What Happened To "What Happened": Amazon Slashes Hillary's Book Price 40% Before It Hits Shelves

Tyler Durden's picture

Last Friday, in an attempt at humor, we shared a satirical note from The Onion suggesting that Hillary had already begun work on a follow-up book, entitled "What Also Happened," intended to define precisely who was to blame for the failure of her first book, "What Happened."

Alas, if prices are any indicator of demand, which they're pretty much universally accepted to be unless you're discussing minimum wages with Bernie Sanders, then Hillary may want to double down on efforts to rush out the sequel as both Amazon and Walmart have decided to slash prices of "What Happened" by 40% before the books even hit shelves.

After Hillary's publisher Simon and Schuster suggested a price of $30, Amazon slashed prices to $17.99 earlier today...


...and Walmart quickly matched...


Of course, the reviews have already started to pour into Amazon even though no one has a copy of the book yet.  Isaac apparently hated the book because he's tired of hearing Hillary "blame her failure on sexism."

"What happened is she can not take responsibility for many of her own actions and blames her failure on sexism.


Ironically, it's things like this that cause people on the fence go to the other side just to spite her."


Meanwhile, DirtBird thought the book was great...at balancing out his uneven table...


Finally, for those who are interested in what Hillary has to say in "What Happened" but just don't have time to read a book right now, we found this summary to be a fairly accurate portrayal:


* * *

For those who missed it, here is The Onion's uncanny prediction of Hillary's latest failure from last Friday...

Fact or Fiction:

CHAPPAQUA, NY - Saying it would provide a candid account of her experiences writing an unsuccessful tell-all, sources confirmed Thursday that Hillary Clinton is already working on a follow-up book casting blame for the failures of her previous memoir What Happened.



“From my agent negotiating that underwhelming deal with Simon & Schuster, to the graphic designer’s lackluster cover art, to my so-called supporters who couldn’t be bothered to drop $17.99 for the hardcover copy - everyone had a hand in undermining my last book’s success,” reads a passage from the introduction to Clinton’s What Also Happened, which repeatedly decries her prior book’s “indecipherable” font and dedicates an entire chapter to lashing out at her copy editor for making her look like “an idiot third-grader.”


“I’ll never forget how Amazon buried me and how Barnes & Noble completely sabotaged me by displaying my book way in the back in that no man’s land by the CDs. Frankly, it’s obvious I got screwed on all sides.”



Accusing them of stealing her spotlight, the book reportedly concludes with a long list of every other celebrity who published a memoir in the past year.

Source: The Onion

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konadog's picture

Losing was a setback, but as long as it's breathing, it can continue doing "good deeds". Only when it finally meets up with Janet Reno holding hands with Lucifer will I breathe a sigh of relief. Maybe Seth will get a chance to say "howdy" with his fist before it boards the elevator.

Eyes Opened's picture

"she can't do anyone any favors anymore"

She can do me a favour and FOAD !! 

New_Meat's picture

I'm waiting for a copy in the used book exchange at our trash transfer station.  They do a brisk business of free books.

morongobill's picture

Gotta clear out all the John Grisham books first.

Mazzy's picture

Who the fuck even buys books like that?  To actually read it from cover to cover?  Just for the laughs?

I'm guessing one of her biggest subset of customers are going to be conservative blog posters just so they can skim through the book and pick it apart.

freedogger's picture

It would make a decent gag gift for my friends that truly hate her like I do.

Eyes Opened's picture


I could tell you ... but I'd have to kill you....

konadog's picture

I'm here to help poor little crooked Hyena Rodent get her side of the story out into the public domain:


InnVestuhrr's picture




"it takes a village"




kiwidor's picture

it takes a village to smash her skull in with clubs, so no one can be indicted because it was impossible to determine who delivered the final fatal blow.

F em all but 6's picture

It takes a village! YUP. And every village has its idiot. And now the idiot has her own book

wisehiney's picture

What book does hitlery like the most?

The foundation check book.


har har

insanelysane's picture

Maybe they should have published it in Spanish???

PlayMoney's picture

"puta Hillary....que pasa"?

yaright's picture

Go away just go.  You got away with it all your slimmy, pizzia, MSM in your pocket DNC in your pocket and you fucking lost! now just leave or eat a bag of dicks oh wait you dont like those

Dickguzinya's picture

The harridan knows no shame, just like the man of the people who lives in a mansion in Chicago.  We just spent eight years being used as the world's toilet bowl, while every misfit was glorified and lauded as exceptional, and those who are truly exceptional, and could have added to our country, were dumped on and shoved to the back of the bus.  The mental illness is so thick, you could cut it with a knife.  Just be thankful that you don't have to sleep next to this disgraceful faccia brute.

ForWhomTheTollBuilds's picture

I know a lot of you are worried, but put your minds at ease:


Hillary would have goten paid in advance for this one like she did for "Hard choices" ($14 million).  She's gonna be ok.

corporatewhore's picture

It was a payoff much like a former Speaker of the House--Jim Wright for his written tripe.  No one cares about her or whom she blames.

lumen ex lumine's picture

"No one cares about her or whom she blames"

I think you mean, "who she blames". This is America dammit !

morongobill's picture

They came, they saw, they burned the books


aliens is here's picture

The book advance is a DemonRats payment for Hillary's lost in 2016.

WALLST8MY8BALL's picture

I will add this book to my Ironic Library - right next to
Bill Cosby's "Love and Marriage"

Ubernostrum's picture

It'll make the best seller list @ Dollar Tree fo sho.

taketheredpill's picture

What The Fuck Happened


Omen IV's picture

A door stop costs $.67 cents

Victory_Garden's picture














SillySalesmanQuestion's picture

"She's a fucking tree killer, I tell ya..."

Ubernostrum's picture

Maybe it's just simple leftist economics - rather than just 1 of what you need none of, you can instead get 4 for the price of 3 plus 1 free.  

Also I'm certain ol' Hitlady will blame 'leaked' copies of the book for poor sales while sheepishly accepting credit for recycling the millions of unsold copies to save the environment from climate wishywashyness.

VWAndy's picture

Its only going to sell in bulk sales. Maybe as text books. Other than that who buys a loosers book? Burnie voters?

Antivenom's picture

She has gone out and flapped her lips about the whole book. Had she quietly gone away, wrote the book and kept her mouth shut, some idiots would have bought the book. She just isn't very bright.

aloha_snakbar's picture

I would not even use that tripe to line my bird cage. What a joke that cunt is

ted41776's picture

they're betting on the audiobook version instead, you know, since most of her supporters can't read

1777's picture

They should have given a bigger discount...,.oh wait....I wouldn't read it for free!!


PGR88's picture

Who the fuck wants to read a 300 page cocktail of Clinton political narrative-building and fairy-tale telling, group-tested slogans, and so-called MSM hot-button issues?

are we there yet's picture

How much would Hillary have to pay me to get me to read her Thought provoking analysis? About $100 an hour if I was not doing anything interesting on the toilet.

Bad_Sushi's picture

Who gives a flying rat's ass about that cunt? 

are we there yet's picture

Another problem with book sales is that Hillary's voting base either can not read or is in Chicago cemeteries.

hangemhigh77's picture

This is a GREAT book!! The prosecution can use it when this witch goes on trial for treason.

WTFUD's picture

It's selling like hot cookies in Kiev, to be fair. Sold 6 yesterday and that's great for Kiev folks who can't read or write.

Ilmarinen's picture

This whole comment section has been a delighttful read.  Thank you all for brightening my day.

directaction's picture

Quick Poll. Pick One:
<--- Row a canoe into a hurricane
<--- Buy her book.

WTFUD's picture

What happened next?

Did she complete/plan this masterpiece before or after she had Seth murdered?

tahoeguy's picture

That miserable whore would have to pay me a substantial sum to read that trash.  To attach a price tag is an insult to anyone with an IQ that registers.

peippe's picture

Don't fear anything on this planet....

but IF there is a hell & I gotta go, I know what will be on the shelves of ole' Nick's library:

Hillary's crap, obama's my father BS & Judy Blume. : (         

Robert Trip's picture

You can order the Coles Notes version for $3.99 and it's only 6 pages.

Just the hard-hitting juicy stuff.

Stormtrooper's picture

Does it include who offed Seth Rich?