What Happened To "What Happened": Amazon Slashes Hillary's Book Price 40% Before It Hits Shelves

Tyler Durden's picture

Last Friday, in an attempt at humor, we shared a satirical note from The Onion suggesting that Hillary had already begun work on a follow-up book, entitled "What Also Happened," intended to define precisely who was to blame for the failure of her first book, "What Happened."

Alas, if prices are any indicator of demand, which they're pretty much universally accepted to be unless you're discussing minimum wages with Bernie Sanders, then Hillary may want to double down on efforts to rush out the sequel as both Amazon and Walmart have decided to slash prices of "What Happened" by 40% before the books even hit shelves.

After Hillary's publisher Simon and Schuster suggested a price of $30, Amazon slashed prices to $17.99 earlier today...


...and Walmart quickly matched...


Of course, the reviews have already started to pour into Amazon even though no one has a copy of the book yet.  Isaac apparently hated the book because he's tired of hearing Hillary "blame her failure on sexism."

"What happened is she can not take responsibility for many of her own actions and blames her failure on sexism.


Ironically, it's things like this that cause people on the fence go to the other side just to spite her."


Meanwhile, DirtBird thought the book was great...at balancing out his uneven table...


Finally, for those who are interested in what Hillary has to say in "What Happened" but just don't have time to read a book right now, we found this summary to be a fairly accurate portrayal:


* * *

For those who missed it, here is The Onion's uncanny prediction of Hillary's latest failure from last Friday...

Fact or Fiction:

CHAPPAQUA, NY - Saying it would provide a candid account of her experiences writing an unsuccessful tell-all, sources confirmed Thursday that Hillary Clinton is already working on a follow-up book casting blame for the failures of her previous memoir What Happened.



“From my agent negotiating that underwhelming deal with Simon & Schuster, to the graphic designer’s lackluster cover art, to my so-called supporters who couldn’t be bothered to drop $17.99 for the hardcover copy - everyone had a hand in undermining my last book’s success,” reads a passage from the introduction to Clinton’s What Also Happened, which repeatedly decries her prior book’s “indecipherable” font and dedicates an entire chapter to lashing out at her copy editor for making her look like “an idiot third-grader.”


“I’ll never forget how Amazon buried me and how Barnes & Noble completely sabotaged me by displaying my book way in the back in that no man’s land by the CDs. Frankly, it’s obvious I got screwed on all sides.”



Accusing them of stealing her spotlight, the book reportedly concludes with a long list of every other celebrity who published a memoir in the past year.

Source: The Onion

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tahoeguy's picture

no but it does have a scratch and sniff chapter...

Hulk's picture

I wouldn't wipe my ass with its pages....

TRM's picture

Yea a paper cut from that skanky war hag's book could be fatal.

Fedtacular's picture

But think of all the other uses.

Dilluminati's picture

The show "CBS Sunday Morning" which owns Simon & Schuster (and provided the disclaimer as they did the free book pimiping interview) this last Sunday seem to be oblivious to the fact that people see right through this phony piece of shit of a politician.  That it isn't sexist, misogyny, or any other excuse except to say we knew her well and DIDN'T FUCKING LIKE HER.  I mean she earns the title ridiculous cunt when she stated on TV that somehow the public misunderstood her and nothing could be further from the truth.  Every subsequent behavior since she lost the election enforces the relief that many of us have that she is not POTUS.  

This woman is like some twisted narcissist who still can't come to terms with the fact that her negatives with voters irrespective of the grab them by the pussy argument, the media collusion, Sychophant followers, and corrupt contributions, wasn't enough to do anything better than what she did.  Truth be told, TRUMP might have run a cleaner campaign if you look back on it, and really: BERNIE SHOULD HAVE BEEN TREATED BETTER.  This ridiculous cunt of a woman still is in denial of her legacy which frankly isn't that fucking impressive with the voters who really do know who the fuck she is! 

Bernie would have done better, Joe Biden would have done better, but the media tried to coronate two fucking hated political dynasties that the voters rejected: Bush and Clinton!  So she needs counseling, chardonnay, medication, whatever the fuck.. and really she never did account for the emails and the poorly handled Haitain relief effort, and the media was so complicit in her enabling we have a new memme for them: FAKE NEWS.  

So if Sunday Morning had challenged her account of history, pointed out that her arrogance, entitlement, reliance on the black vote to win it all, race politics, identity politics, and all the other ugly stuff that her party brough to the show.. if she would take ownership of an ugly performance and crooked convention and DNC, well we might give a fuck what she thinks... uhmm think of it.. no. we don't

We know this stupid selfish cunt well, nothing in her book negates the truths about her.  Nothing.. we know her by her acts.

Ridiculous Cunt Hillary, crooked DNC, Donna Brazil, email server in her bathroom, emails on laptop of weinners sex laptop with minors, Bill at the tarmac with Lorretta.. fuck them all and adios..  And where is the fucking money for Haitai?  http://charlesortel.com/

We know her oh so well


Stan Smith's picture

+ 1 gazillions more.   In spades.

She's truly a disgrace.   But she's to stupid to notice.

EnragedUSMCExpat's picture

It is a continuing source of wonder WHY the public refuses to hold Clinton News Network accountable for anything. Even after the damage they caused with their bogus, bullshit fake news "reporting" of Irma, where it is documented and the damage may be directly linked to them. And yet, attention-seeking idiots still continue to give them the time of day simply to get their vacuous, sheeple mugs on camera along with the ass-licking politicians and cops that allow themselves to be stampeded and threatened into doing their bidding. Un-fucking-believable. 

And some readers here have the temerity to rag on ZH? Give me a tiny, little fucking break.

acett's picture

"At this point, what difference does it make?"

Robert Trip's picture

No per-orders from Libya yet.

Patience dear, patience.

Robert Trip's picture

If a DVD sex tape of her and Huma was included sales would be bolstered somewhat.

Maybe run it by some marketing people.

tahoeguy's picture

Thats some twisted shit... Nobody even wants to envision something that repulsive.  If you really want to pump that segment of the population, a hildabeast mexican quarter or donkey show would probably be more appropriate.

J Jason Djfmam's picture

I kinda felt bad for the donkey.

macdavy's picture

fucking the paper is only good to wipe your ass with

Fedtacular's picture

If you routinely wipe with used toilet paper I concur.

Sudden Debt's picture

Shit... happened.

GunnyG's picture

It was never about the book, it was about a payoff to Cankles for access in the future. The publisher gets access, Cankles makes bank, and the loss gets written off on their taxes, screwing the American taxpayers. One big scam orchestrated by the Dems. and their enablers in media.

UselessEater's picture

LOL - following is from a newsletter I got from American Free Press recent;y. Wish I could show Billary.


Did you know that Mike Piper's book, Final Judgment: The Missing Link in the JFK Assassination Conspiracy, sells for $200 (new) on Amazon? If you don't believe us, here is the link:


The lowest - used - price on Amazon is $65. And it is easy to understand the demand.

When this book was first published, it was the most radical JFK assassination investigative work ever. The fact that Piper dared to link the crime directly to Israel shocked the world and caused the book to be widely banned.

We cannot understate the power and importance of this title.

But now, AFP has this book for sale once again!

Final Judgment: The Missing Link in the JFK Assassination Conspiracy, Volumes 1 & 2, now in its Seventh Edition.


edit: AFP sells it at the regular price (Billary can't even get that!!!!)

Mr. Class and Quality's picture

I don't normally condone book burning, but for this heap of trash...by all means.

LadyAtZero's picture

Hillary gives cheating, lying, hypocritical, power-hungry narcissists a bad name. 

UselessEater's picture

As long as PewDiePie does not say Nigger!!!!!!!!!!!!!

J Jason Djfmam's picture

I have decided to replace that word with "looter" and suggest that others do the same.

tahoeguy's picture

The only thing I want to know "What Happened?" to is the Amazon reviews.  I was looking forward to a good read!  That whore is literally good for nothing.

Robert Trip's picture

The Snowflake Bible.

It will sell big time.

gdpetti's picture

Only if their parents buy it for them, as most of them won't spend their little paychecks on this stuff... which they can probably get for free on the net anyway, right?

As for the Hillarious One, if there is any public example of a psychopath in society, she fits the bill. They never take blame. They always blame others, even when it seems like they are seeing a fault in themselves... it still comes out that it was someone else's fault... this is classic...  Psycho 101.

Don't expect a psycho to change their spots... they were 'born that way'... genetic feature that allows them to operate without a conscience... like any 2nd level predator... think of them that way... only the out of control physical ones are put in jail.. the rest get off easy.... find that manipulating those 'regular' people with consciences an easy thing to do.

TwelveOhOne's picture

Met one last year.  Stil recovering, emotionally.

tstpilot00101's picture

No one cares what happened to this sick, psychotic bitch.  What happened is that she's CORRUPT to the core and a better candidate came along and kicked the shit out of her sorry ass campaign.  Canckles, just go away! (and I mean 6 FEET UNDER away)

Robert Trip's picture

"What Happened?"

You got your ass kicked, that's what happened.

Don't need 300 pages to explain that.

Eeesh's picture

I hope Hillary reads this article and its comments. 

What are the odds she reads ZH? 

redmudhooch's picture

The spooks read ZH, they'll tell her.

No they won't, they don't want to die.

Able Ape's picture

"Campaigning?  I'd rather be licking Huma's Carpet!..." Reason #1 she got shellacked.

Arthur Two Sheds Jackson's picture

If you have to write a book explaining why you're a loser...

I can't even make myself understand this, tbh.


juicy_bananas's picture

We grabbed some folks by the pussy.

Wannabee's picture

Will make a great white elephant Christmas gift this year!

Fedtacular's picture

U couldn't use a shredded copy of this shit to line a hamster cage.

PlayMoney's picture

S & S gonna lose big money. Now the question is what to do with all the copies. Don't think would even make good shit paper in an emergency.

Fedtacular's picture

Shit on every page already. Tree had to give its life so it's only right.

saldulilem's picture

Sex tape > Memoirs

Swamidon's picture

Ship these books to outhouses in Africa to use as cheap tear out toilet paper.

Apocalypse Wow's picture

Arm yourself with a wooden stake, the HildaBeast keeps rising from the dead.


GoldHermit's picture

What happened? The publisher just took it in the shorts. God knows who she's going to blame for this one – I guess each and everyone of us that don't give a shit about her book.

smacker's picture

Her first book ((What Happened)) won't sell much except maybe to wannabe historians because people are waiting for Vol 2 ((What Also Happened)). Some are even waiting for Vol 3 ((What Really Happened)).

Rumours of a Vol 4 ((What Never Happened)) are also doing the rounds.

Even Vol 3 may never get ghosted because her health is following her political career: it's failing.

SmedleyButlersGhost's picture

I wouldn't take the book for free but would pay the $18 for an unedited YouTube clip of her having a seizure complete with a full on mud blowout on her Depends with a Huma hazmat cleanup.

Jballsquared's picture

It's nearly impossible for a strong progressive female leader to sell books at the same price as a man in a society of misogynist racist shite patriarchy. The books failure will merely prove the points she made in the book about why everyone hates her because they were duped into believing she was a lying crooked slag.

SmedleyButlersGhost's picture

I'm a little unclear. Is her being a lying, self serving, Traitorous cunt a factor or not?

Anunnaki's picture

+1 if snark
-1 if sincere

CRM114's picture

W(h)ine should come in bottles, not in books.

MuffDiver69's picture

Somewhere a pajama boy is buying this for his blue haired land whale...Anticipating later that night when she ties on the strap on and rams it home as he reads the first chapter out loud between screams...