Dimon Doubles Down: "My Daughter Bought Bitcoin. It Went Up, Now She Thinks She Is A Genius"

Tyler Durden's picture

Having slammed bitcoin earlier in the day during a Barclays financial conference, calling it a "fraud" which is "worse than tulip bulbs, it won't end well" and that any JPMorgan "trader trading bitcoin" will be "fired for being stupid", the JPM CEO doubled down later in the day during an interview on CNBC's Delivering Alpha conference, saying bitcoin "is just not a real thing, eventually it will be closed."

Making the bitcoin advocates' case for them, Dimon said he’s skeptical authorities will allow a currency to exist without state oversight, especially if something goes wrong. “Someone’s going to get killed and then the government’s going to come down,” he said. “You just saw in China, governments like to control their money supply.”

Which, of course, is the whole point behind cryptocurrency: a method of exchange that is independent of and in apposition to conventionally accepted fiat and monetary mechanisms, one which the government frowns upon if not outright rejects, even if it is ultimately unable to block it. As an example of that, observe the reaction in bitcoin to this weekend's news that China is (allegedly) closing bitcoin exchanges: BTC dropped from $4,700 to $4,200 and... that was about it. Of course, to the CEO of JPMorgan, which incidentally is a founding member of the Enterprise Ethereum Alliance and which nearly two years ago started a trial project using blockchain to cut trading costs, such positioning only has negative connotations:

“If you were in Venezuela or Ecuador or North Korea or a bunch of parts like that, or if you were a drug dealer, a murderer, stuff like that, you are better off doing it in bitcoin than U.S. dollars. So there may be a market for that, but it’d be a limited market.”

He is right: the market is limited right now because only a handful of modern countries have experienced catastrophic hyperinflation, but the number is rising. And what bitcoin - like gold - provides is protection if the monetary insanity unleashed by "developed market" central banks eventually results in the same outcome as Venezuela, North Korea and so on. It's insurance, and judging by the soaring price, more and more are eager to buy this insurance.

Imagine what will happen when the market is no longer limited?

Ultimately Dimon does grasp the implications, because as he told CNBC, "I'm not saying go short. Bitcoin can hit $100,000 before it goes down. This is not advice of what to do."

No, his advise is simpler: stop trading bitcoin and instead trade commission-generating equities ideally with JPMorgan: earlier in the day Dimon warned that JPM's trading revenue in Q3 will tumble 20%.

And then there was the amusing anecdote involving his own daughter: "My daughter bought bitcoin, it went up and now she thinks she's a genius."

Well, she is more of a genius than equity investors: bitcoin has soared without the Fed and other central banks having to inject $15 trillion in liquidity to keep it from crashing...


Amusingly, a reader sent in the following terse comment on Dimon and Bitcoin:

Two numbers that stand out:

  • Over $13b in fines paid by JPM because of fraudulent mortgage practices
  • Over $1b in separate fines paid because of its role in the Madoff scheme.

All under Jamie's watch. But it's Bitcoin he's worried is the fraud?


Actually, I'm quite grateful to him. Not only does he reconfirm the existential threat the underlying tech poses to his business, but he's becoming the perfect contrarian indicator.


Once JPM announces it's own crypto research and trading desk, complete with structured products and derivatives built around Bitcoin, we'll know it's time to sell!

And speaking of contrarian indicators, Bitcoin has already recovered more than half the losses it sustained after today's Dimon slam.

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wisehiney's picture

These mofos are the best contrary indicators on earth.

Bitcoin will fly now.

And gundlach says rates are too low again.

Sub 2% ten year here we come.

nope-1004's picture

I'd fire anyone that trades Bitcoin.

But did I mention, my daughter bought some.....



YUNOSELL's picture

I called my good friend Jamie up and said "Jamie I just sold my bitcoin at a high -- can you now announce it is a scam and you won't let your traders trade it?", and after it went down, I called him back saying "OK Jamie, I bought it back when it was low -- now can you make that comment about your daughter buying it to push it up again?"

Thanks Jamie!

Creepy_Azz_Crackaah's picture

Jamie, Just remind your daughter about the Beanie Babies that she bought at $1500 each.

Pladizow's picture

What! --- The manufacturer of the horse and buggy thinks the automobile is a fraud?

Pladizow's picture

Fraud? Was it Bitcoin or JPM that got the tax payer bailout?

Croesus's picture

Everything connected to the status quo is a fraud.

AtATrESICI's picture

Jamie Dimon should have been prosecuted. Too big for laws. God bless the US...

tmosley's picture

>yfw Jamie Dimon is such a weak bitch he can't stand being outperformed by his own daughter

CH1's picture

Class act, insulting his daughter.

tion's picture

Tmos, could you tell me where to read more about the Exodus comment, or must I dive into the rabbit hole? 

tmosley's picture

TBH it's pretty surface level. The fall of the Hyksos Dynasty matches up almost exactly with Exodus, datewise. Little bit too much of a coincidence.


Suspect the Torah was made up during the Babylonian captivity using a number of oral (and a few written) traditions that were around at the time, re-written to put the captive citizens of Judah at the center of everything, and painting them as a people who had always been united as a single people, under the patron god of Judah, who, of course, is ALL POWERFUL, and clearly superior to the gods of the people who beat their asses and raised their capital to the ground.

TahoeBilly2012's picture

Yea, why buy Bitcoin when you can dump 20,000 silver contracts sunday night when the market opens.

MANvsMACHINE's picture

Is Jamie saying that he would fire his daughter?

tion's picture

Hmm thank you,  I will do some reading 

rccalhoun's picture

Jamie's daughter didnt buy the beanie babies for $1500. jamie (himself) bought them--a lot of them.

The only thing jamie des right is have his nose up the right asses.....and that is the only thing anyone need do right on wall street or in

wash dc.  so he a king, because his nose is 100% constantly brown.


greenskeeper carl's picture

Funny because although he is probably right about bitcoin, EVERYTHING his banks trades in isn't "real" either. The idea that bitcoins are any more fraudulent than dollars borrowed into existence, at interest, or printed out of nothin, or just conjured out of thin air on a computer, is patently absurd. Also funny because his firm, his wealth, the entire ediface upon which he exists, is nothing but a mountain of fraud, deception and bullshit

caconhma's picture

Fed and other Central banks WILL NOT tolerate any currency outside of their complete control.

So, grow up and think: why did FED & US Treasury tolerate bitcoin for so long? Who is really behind it? Remember that even gambling is highly regulated in America either by the government or the CIA/FBI controlled mafia.

Exponere Mendaces's picture

So they've tolerated it for about 8+ years, but NO LONGER?


Yeah, you really should think about what you type, it would prevent you from looking like a complete idiot.

Oh man, you kill me.


Is tmosley Jamie's daughter ? 

Sure talks a mean pumper book like she does.................... 

cheeseheader's picture

Boy I sure hope Dimon doesn't turn into another ZH fav like Musk, and we are forced to read about him way more than we should.

TruthHammer's picture

Tommy boy is a lil' b, but not that one

mmanvil74's picture

“If you were in Venezuela or Ecuador or North Korea or a bunch of parts like that"...

It turns out, most countries in the world do not trust the long term value of their national currency, nor should they. The market size of "parts like that" dwarfs developed world currency holders.

Developed nations' currencies are also in decline albeit more slowly, just look at how they are falling in value against stocks, real estate, food, etc.

With the mainstream banks getting increasingly nervous about the new coin on the block (pun intended), smart people are asking the question, who do you trust with your money? JP Morgan or Bitcoin?

(Ecuador uses USD by the way, Mr. Dimon)

tmosley's picture

Nice argument free post, per the usual.

Wonder how long you will last? You know, until you commit suicide. Such is the inevitable consequence of ENVY.

ZH Snob's picture

this will be a tough one for the average ZHer.  do I fall on bitcoin's side or Jamie Dimon's?

tmosley's picture

If they were smart, they would come out against Dimon and state that such words from him are either unpersuasive or the opposite of persuasion.

But then, if they were smart, they would already be in crypto.

Bay of Pigs's picture

Most ZHers have been speaking against Dimon and the Morgue since this site went online 8 years ago. I've been bashing that particular bank since the 1990's.

Where the fuck have you been and what the hell are you talking about?

tmosley's picture

Perhaps you missed the part where he came out against bitcoin and the peanut gallery started singing his praises?

Bay of Pigs's picture

Generalize much?

Read your own post you idiot.

Raffie's picture

Silver is always in Pre-Teen nerd rage about cryptos.



You and tmosley should get a room,and go all Brokeback Mountain on each other. Or, the sheep. 

Exponere Mendaces's picture

What a tard. Look what holding metals does to you folks, it isn't pretty.

So when you nutjobs get together for the grope-and-poke, do you moan Tmosely's name?

tmosley's picture

I'm sure the kikes made fun of tally sticks too. I can just see them mocking it. "Sticks as money, lol!!!!"

Well, it outlasted them by several hundred years. Their descendants finally gathered them all up with money stolen from Germans via their central bank and used them to open the BoE.

Wonder if people will remember the lesson this time?

Creepy_Azz_Crackaah's picture

LOL! So many desperate ZHers needing their bitcoins to go to the moon for retirement. I hope that you all do well and get out at the right time. I'm paying for WAY too many free shiters with my taxes as it is! Don't go broke on your "smarts."

tmosley's picture

You do realize you can offset your taxes with silver losses, right? You won't have to pay taxes for DECADES!

TruthHammer's picture

always the racist garbage, sorry a jewish guy stole your sister away from you, but get over it

tmosley's picture

Aww, the little doxxer doesn't approve of my knowledge of the Jews and Their Lies.

You gonna tell my mommy on me?

TruthHammer's picture

its cute that you reply thinking I even look to see what you say in reply

1.) Doxxing requires publishing information, even if i know your age, address, phone number, etc, it wouldnt be doxxing unless I printed, or threatened to come and pound the shit out of you, etc.

2.) You dont have a real job, so obviously you can get away with being part of the racist herd that ruined zerohedge's comment section, without fear of consequences.  Had you actually succeeded in Chemistry and managed to get a position, instead of minor co-authorships, then I am sure you would behave differently.

3.) Being in your mid 20s when first stumbling across ZH and its early days, its not surprising the high Finance and Economic conversations vastly exceeded your understanding.  In a way, someone as pathetic as you needed zerohedge comments to descend to 4chan levels for you to participate


tmosley - with your past silver losses, according to you, you won't have a tax liability for 10 more generations. 

Add that to your future Bitcoin losses, and you got the descendants covered until the year 3000 or so.  

tmosley's picture

Oh no, I won't be able to contribute to the warfare/welfare state?

Such a shame!

overbet's picture

I dont need shit which is why I have discretionary income to throw at it.  I cheer for it for the same reason I cheer for metals. Profits of course, but also to keep our earnings, to not have our earnings stolen by corrupt government organizations and scheming bankers. 

The_Juggernaut's picture

The lesson that gold talks and bullshit walks?

tmosley's picture

The lesson is that oldbugs let jews get control of their precious and they are going to die in poverty as a result. The young people came up with a solution that mirrors an ancient one that WORKED.

VD's picture

now the resident antifa crypt0-turd goes on his anti-semetic bullshit rant.


 silver bug loser setting up to be the ultimate loser.

silverserfer's picture

no the lesson is that you are the definition of weak hands. Chasing parabolic fads is all you know. 

tmosley's picture

You know, they call it a "death grip" for a reason.

silverserfer's picture

I have two sons, and the word legacy means something to me. That is perspective. Fuck the shysty bullshit. 

TruthHammer's picture

Career opportunities passed him over, and this is all he has left to hold on for meaning in life.

tmosley's picture

God forbid that I pass up an opportunity to take a position that paid 40% less than what I was getting paid back then and had no opportunity for advancement.