Manic Tories Trump Monty Python

Tyler Durden's picture

Authored by Raul Ilargi Meijer via The Automatic Earth blog,

There can be little doubt that the British, in general, have a sense of humor. And that’s perhaps the lens through which we should view the country these days. After all, what other options do we have? A comment yesterday to a Guardian article sums up the situation quite perfectly in just a few words (note: Dignitas has something to do with assisted dying):

Brexit is rapidly becoming like someone who booked a trip to Dignitas when they were told they were dying and has now been told there’s a cure. But they’re going to Switzerland anyway, because they can’t face dealing with Ryanair’s customer service team.

There are two main British political parties, Tories and Labour, which fight each other whenever and wherever they can. Moreover, each party has several camps that fight each other even more, if at all possible. The George W.- friendly Tony Blair Orchestra in the Labour Party seems to have lost out to the actually left-wing Jeremy Corbynistas for now, but they won’t give up without a fight (power is their only hobby). Blair is still commenting from the sidelines on Corbyn’s perceived follies while his faithful lament about how their Tone was misled by 43 into bombing Iraq.

The Tories have gone full-monty Monty Python. John Cleese et al must feel at least a pang of jealousy. 40 Tory MPs have allegedly gathered to demand for PM Theresa May to quit. A whole bunch of both Labour and Tory lawmakers threaten to tackle her over not allowing them a vote in any Brexit deal (which for now is entirely hypothetical). Other voices across party lines demand the resignation -or sacking- of foreign not-so-very-ministerial Boris Johnson.

One Tory MP, the Rt. Hon. John Redwood MP, who’s also Chief Global Strategist for Charles Stanley, wrote an op-ed in the FT telling investors to pull their money out of the UK. You can’t make that kind of stuff up. Or you can, but no-one would believe a word. The Python crew would have never made a dime if they had started out today, because life in Britain has now seriously trumped art. When the other guys are funnier without even trying, maybe comedy’s not your thing.

And that’s how we slide seamlessly right down into Theresa May and the Holy Grail, the probably best representation of what is going on. May never wanted a Brexit, but she’s so power hungry that she jumped at a chance of defending what she doesn’t believe in. By the way, apart maybe from Corbyn, all the actors in this comedy are in it not because they care for their country, but for themselves, exclusively. Brilliant video, by the way.

Not that Brexit is necessarily such a terrible thing. Putting distance between yourselves and the European Union may well be the most sensible thing there is. Because Brussels is now defined more than anything by what it has done -and failed to do- to Greece, to the refugees and to Catalonia. And it will never be able to shake that off. The EU, just like the UK, is ruled by people who care only about themselves. Our political systems self-select for sociopaths, with precious few exceptions.

Even if you see Brexit as a purely economical move, which most people do even though it’s very much not true, the British people should rejoice knowing that they won’t be the ones forking over for the next pan-European bank bailout. Then again, they’ll have to bail out their own banks. Which have grown way out of hand, the price paid for wanting to become a global finance center.

Nor will the British people be forced to pay up for the newly-revived, scary-as-hell and unholy idea of a European army, an idea that originated in the 1950s and has re-gained support the very moment Britain voted for Brexit:

EU To Sign Defense Pact, May Allow Limited British Role

France, Germany and 20 other EU governments are set to sign a defense pact on Monday they hope marks a new era of European military integration to cement unity after Britain’s decision to quit the bloc. In Europe’s latest attempt to lessen its reliance on the United States, the 22 governments will create a formal club that should give the European Union a more coherent role in tackling international crises.

 

“We’ve never come this far before,” said a senior EU official said of EU defense integration efforts that date back to a failed bid in the 1950s. “We are in a new situation.” The election of pro-European Emmanuel Macron as France’s president and warnings by U.S. President Donald Trump that European allies must pay more towards their security have propelled the project forward, diplomats said.

 

[..] A system to spot weaknesses across EU armed forces, in coordination with U.S.-led NATO, is due to start in a pilot stage, while a multi-billion-euro EU fund to support the pact is still under negotiation. Long blocked by Britain, which feared the creation of an EU army, defense integration was revived by France and Germany after Britons voted to leave the EU in June 2016.

 

[..] London is not part of the initiative but British officials have been pressing for third country involvement. Britain’s aerospace industry and its biggest defense firm BAE Systems fear losing out, diplomats said. Britain may be able to join in, but only on an exceptional basis if it provides substantial funds and expertise.

They don’t even know who’ll be the leader of this European Army. There are plenty of reasons this was voted down 60 years ago and left in the dustbin ever since. A German supreme commander, anyone? The female German minister of defence just yesterday let slip that she supports regime change in Poland. That’s all you should need to know.

This is presented in Brussels as a money saver. European countries have too many different weapons systems, is the reasoning, and need to become ‘more efficient’. I bet you right here and now that it will cost Europe an arm and an extra leg or two-three. But not Britain. Which can also, simultaneously, if and when sensible people are in office, ditch its grandiose notions of being an empire or world power, and cut its armed forces by 50 or 75%.

And while they’re at it, cut its arms industry into little pieces and flush them down the Thames. Brexit can be an opportunity, a chance for the country to fully re-invent itself. But first, the Python-styled tragic comedy starring Theresa and Boris will have to be played to its tragic finale. To that end, and since it just wouldn’t feel fair to leave him out, let’s make sure we reserve a role for George Orwell as well – it comes natural:

UK Government Tensions Rise After Leak Of ‘Orwellian’ Memo Sent To May

The tensions in Theresa May’s government intensified on Sunday night ahead of this week’s vital votes on the Brexit bill, as ministers accused Boris Johnson and Michael Gove of sending an “Orwellian” set of secret demands to No 10. As an increasingly weakened prime minister faces the possibility of parliamentary defeats on the bill, government colleagues have said they are aghast at the language used by the foreign secretary and the environment secretary in a joint private letter.

 

The leaked letter – a remarkable show of unity from two ministers who infamously fell out during last year’s leadership campaign – appeared to be designed to push May decisively towards a hard Brexit and limit the influence of former remainers. It complained of “insufficient energy” on Brexit in some parts of the government and insisted any transition period must end in June 2021 – a veiled attack on the chancellor, Philip Hammond.

A decision as big and defining as Brexit should always have been executed by a government, or a coalition, in which as broad a spectrum of the population as possible is represented. It’s crazy to let just one party push through their version, especially when views are so divergent and tensions run this high. The Tories have just a slight majority.

But really, all Labour have to do is wait until May and Boris and Gove and all the others run out of gas and their engine seizes. They lost two ministers in a week and more will follow. So Labour makes a peace offer, knowing full well it won’t be accepted, but has to be made just for form.

As per tomorrow, May’s EU Withdrawal Bill will be discussed in Parliament and the next episode of Theresa May and the Holy Grail can start. John Cleese will be watching, thinking every five minutes: “Why didn’t I think of that?”. The Bill will be ripped to shreds, between a Hard Brexit and a No Brexit side, and hundreds of amendments, and May will be ripped along with it.

Even her chances of lasting just the week are slim. She has to turn to Labour for support, but she can’t. If she does, Boris will smell his opportunity for the top post. He might even get it, but that would lead to something awfully close to civil war; still, maybe that’s inevitable anyway, and perhaps it would be a good thing. Cards on the table.

UK Labour Makes Brexit Offer to May as Future in Balance

Keir Starmer, the party’s Brexit spokesman, wrote to May on Monday telling her there was a “sensible majority” in Parliament to secure a two-year transition deal for after Brexit. That would allow Britain to stay inside the European Union’s single market and customs union after 2019 while it completes trade talks with the bloc. He said the opposition to such an arrangement came from Conservatives.

 

“Over recent weeks, it has become increasingly clear that you alone do not have the authority to deliver a transitional deal with Europe and to take the necessary steps to protect jobs and the economy,” Starmer wrote in the letter, which was released by his office.

 

May is unlikely to welcome Labour’s offer, which highlights the fragility of her position. The premier, who lost two cabinet ministers in a week to different scandals, has received a letter from pro-Brexit rival Boris Johnson demanding a bolder approach to the divorce, the Mail on Sunday reported. And 40 Conservative lawmakers back a challenge to her leadership, The Sunday Times said, just eight short of the number that triggers a vote.

 

[..] May’s landmark Brexit legislation, the EU Withdrawal Bill, returns to Parliament on Tuesday, where it faces hundreds of proposed amendments to be considered over eight days of debate. Even with the backing of Northern Ireland’s Democratic Unionist Party, May only has a slim majority. Tories who want to keep close ties to the EU have put their names on many of the measures, suggesting the government will have to back down or be defeated.

They’re talking about dates and timelines to present proposals to the EU, but they’ll never agree on any. And even if they do, Brussels will be ready to tear them to pieces.

It’s hard to see how a Brexit will ever happen, but it’s easy to see that if it ever does, it’ll be an absolutely fabulous mess. And then even John Cleese won’t be laughing anymore.

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BritBob's picture

Gof help us if Corbyn get's elected. God help the Falkland Islanders -

Corbyn and the Falklands - Alicia Castro said regarding Corbyn: "In the end, he is one of 'ours'. Even today, when he comes to our embassy, he arrives with the same bicycle and the same enthusiasm. He is a friendly person with a sense humour, who knows how to listen." Alicia Castro, Argentinian ambassador quoted in Daily Telegraph 14 Sept 2015.

I suppose the world has to go back to its 19th century borders because of a political whim?

Falkland Islands – The Usurpation (1 pg): https://www.academia.edu/34838377/Falkland_Islands_The_Usurpation

 

cherry picker's picture

One day I will go to the Falkland Islands and put my flag on it and tell the British and Argentinians that it is now ruled by itself.

That way no one has to fight over it anymore.

There are no borders in heaven or hell and before the dang Europeans came to the Americas there were none here.

Pliskin's picture

I spent 6 months in the Falklands, working for the MOD, I can tell you with all sincerity...IT'S A SHITHOLE!

I went to Stanley...it was closed..!   But seriously, there are over 30 bars at Mount Pleasant, and it's all VAT free, I even got a poke with some hot St. Helena chick.   I was making serious money for being there, I don't need the money now, but even if I did I wouldn't go back, I'd rather sell my arse in Burton's window!

BritBob must be a 'Benny' (Falkland Islander) he's obviously a troll, and I don't mean an internet troll, I mean a real 'Troll' living under a bridge somewhere with a laptop and a wifi connection!!

 

gmrpeabody's picture

Brush up on your history.., there are, were, and always have been borders everywhere.

Offthebeach's picture

ALL PEOPLES RISE TO JOIN THE PEOPLES MALVINAS LIBERATION FRONT!

( down with the Liberation Peoples Malvinas Action Front, the fkn SPLITTERS! )

HowdyDoody's picture

Splitter! Long live the Malvinas Peoples Liberation Front!

Thoresen's picture

I think BritBob is actually in Gibraltar and doesn't want the Spanish messing up his lifestyle. Falklands has indirect similarities.

AurorusBorealus's picture

Bob, your posts do more to garner support for Argentine control of the Malvinas oilfields than anyone else on the internet.  On behalf of YPF (the Argentine oil company) I want to thank you for the great work.

jin187's picture

Well, if you ask the Arabs and Hispanics, those borders are sacrosanct. Apparently someone realized how much those guys suck at winning wars, and so it was decided around 1840 that the current borders were to be the true borders for everything for all time. That we were done fighting over land, and any wars or political bargains that changed them after that was theft.

Welcome to bizarro world, where we send in jackboots to kick over ballot boxes in the name of freedom and democracy. Where most of the countries on the human rights council have gulags. Where the Nobel Peace Prize is something we automatically give to every black guy that runs a country built by honkeys. Where football players kneel defiantly in the name of racial equality, before running onto the field wearing offensive caricatures of everyone that's not black. Where the losers can whine their way to being winners.

Dame Ednas Possum's picture

Yes to Europe, no to EU. 

Yes to peace, no to NATO. 

 

webmatex's picture

Upvoted but no EU and NATO seems impossible - except in Iceland maybe.

Europe should leave EU and join Icelandic Alliance and Lap dancing Party.

absente reo's picture

Anything is preferable to remaining chained up in the EU superstate.

lucitanian's picture

If you were part of an EU Superstate, that is aware of its own demise unless it is reformed, would you want clowns like these in the UK "IN" or "OUT" of the discussion on how to achieve a functional EU?

The question is rhetorical.

Joe A's picture

Brilliant video. Excellent work.

That European army is a good idea if it means Europeans responsible for their own defense but not under the command of some EU command in Brussels please. And while it is presented as a money saving initiative, the danger is that in an EU of equals (</sarc>), some will be more equal than others, meaning that German and French producers of militairy hardware will benefit over other countries' producers.

OverTheHedge's picture

"meaning that German and French producers of militairy[sic] hardware will benefit over other countries' producers."

What other reason could there possibly be? Obviously there will need to be an increase in EU bureaucracy, and a whole new department created etc, so all the incumbents get to shuffle up the ladder, with extra pay & benefits, but the big money will be in the tank and aircraft supplies business. I wonder how many aircraft carriers will be built in German shipyards?

Doom and Dust's picture

None of you have the slightest idea what the EU is. It's all muh communist superstate swivel eyed libertarianism that has no place in Europe.

Even the writer is a dimwit, saying Greece or Catalonia had anything to do with the EU.

Amerimutts really need to stfu.

Folkvar's picture

No, it's you that clearly has no idea what the EU is. It's clearly you that has no idea who rules over the world and how that ties into the EU. It's clearly you that knows nothing of history. 

Dr. Bonzo's picture

There can be little doubt that the British, in general, have a sense of humor...

Omfg....

Blackfox's picture

That Monty pyhon vid... haha

NoWayJose's picture

Now I have to pull out the DVD... again

Demologos's picture

Boris should toss May into a lake to determine whether she floats or sinks.

Demologos's picture

Before she turns him into a newt.

JDFX's picture

As long as we regain full Political and legal Supremacy from seperating with EU , enjoy the theatre of it all. 

 

The British have gone through, and recovered from much worse.

 

Same generational shit, different generations. 

 

 

BarkingCat's picture

No, ypu have not gone through a lot worse.

Blair and his minions shit snd pissed in your gene pool. You are not coming back from that.

Norse invasions are quite different from Nigerian ones.

You're fucked and the EU had nothing to do with it. 

OverTheHedge's picture

It's not as clear-cut African and Muslim as you seem to think: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethnic_groups_in_the_United_Kingdom

There are more Indians than there are Pakistanis, more Chinese than Bangladeshis: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethnic_groups_in_the_United_Kingdom

The one thing you can say about the UK is that it is very cosmopolitan - people from EVERYWHERE have been swimming to the UK for centuries. Also, bear in mind that London is NOT the entire UK.

The only issue is assuming that the small number of foreigners have the right to take first place in any queue, because of racism.

Rex Andrus's picture

Due to a gift from inbred needle dick khazars Europeans are much more resistant to bubonic plague than africans and semitic beaners. Just sayin =))

jin187's picture

Sneak some SAS guys into the bedrooms of all these cocksuckers in Brussels at 3am to fuck them to death with broomsticks. Their weekly replacements will get the message eventually.

youngman's picture

Great video..boy do I miss Monty Python...I just spent an hour in a government line...just watching the Government employee shuffle papers....doing nothing...

shovelhead's picture

Ministry of Silly Walks?

1 Alabama's picture

Rule #1: gvt is useless.

Rule #2: gvt is corrupt.

Rule #3: gvt is on the wrong side of nature.

Rule #4: Reform gvt.

Rule #5: Rinse and repete.

pparalegal's picture

It is universal. I spent two hours sitting in the police department lobby along with every other ex-con, ne'er-do-well, probationer and crime victim waiting for the one 77 year old snail lady behind the bullet proof glass to call my number. I left after figuring out it would be at least another hour. Paid the luxury government parking lot cash-o-meter and went home. Out of frustration I checked the city/ police website and discovered I could get an instant printable .PDF of the 3 page traffic accident report I wanted. For awesome tax payer only price of $10.00 via credit card or PayPal. Doh!

44magnum's picture

Its a business and you are the unlucky consumer

jin187's picture

Take comfort in knowing you supported some government jobs. Those TP reports aren't going to move themselves back and forth between piles.

booboo's picture

If you want something done from government and if the policy is to have you issue completed by end of day (say iossue a building permit for an illegal bird house you put up over the week end) go on a friday afternoon. There can be 500 people in line but by God they will get your shit done lickity split in order to clear their desk for the weekend. It is an amazing sight. They don't even review your shit they just start blindly stamping shit "approved" and give you the bums rush.

Cassandra.Hermes's picture

Lol Trump just did Monty Python in East Asis. Melania did conundrum to go home and Trump abdicated East Asia to China and left the forum. Didn't he claim that he is extending his trip with extra days to attend the forum and assure the countries that they have US support after he cancelled the trade deal with them?
Now they are signing a deal with China without USA, Trump can be witness of his own defeat of course!

iadr's picture

 Can the Tylers please ban this ugky brown troll?

jin187's picture

The only one we need is China anyway. We'll keep winning, so long as China keeps using slave labor to supply us with computer chips and Nike shoes in exchange for our worthless fiat currency. China keeps winning as long as they can keep using those junk notes to buy up US real estate and megacorps.

A. Boaty's picture

EU and what army?

medium giraffe's picture

Great vid.

Now go away, or ah shall taunt you a second tahm-ah!

Joe A's picture

Some more British humour, here is Nigel Farage in the European Parliament blasting away at collusion by George Soros trying to buy influence in the EP. He calls for a special committee to investigate this.

https://twitter.com/Nigel_Farage

(scroll down a bit).

exi1ed0ne's picture

LOL at the #NeverForget tweet.  It may just be a persona or "brand" like so many political hacks these days, but that guy goes right for the fork.

DelusionsCrowded's picture

Brexist was nothing more than a Masonic canard from the get go , to distract the population from the more important game of getting a war going with Russia . Once such a war was off and running the Brexit would will be dropped . The Illuminati don't neccessarily need to start shooting , what they want is martial law to kill off democracy .

I am of the insight now that the big thing going is to discredit all the Masonic States Democracy governing systems . We see this in Australia where the High 'court' (which I assume is just a bunch of Mason Lawyers who have show PC and loyalty ) has deliberately saboutaged our Governement by making a very odd ruling of duel citizenship , that gets inherited though a parent of a foriegn country ,even if the Australian citizen hasn't applied or recieved a passport or citizenship from the foriegn cournty . This my friends is a classic Masonic scam ; the brotherhood is alway out collecting stuff to blackmail and sabotage so they have had this duel citizenship nonesense up their sleve for years . This sort of bs is no different from using lawyers and the tax departement to persecute someone they don't like . Another reason is for the sabotage of the Turnbull gov is they are too competant and not hostile enough to China and Russia , who's independant existance blocks the NWO world masonic gov . 

Anyway , All the Western Democracies are being brought into to disrepute by these sort of scams and the Masonic Media (which they controlled long ago , but usually use a light hand with , secrecy being essential ) . Just go through on your fingers all the 'Democracies' where the governements are disfuntional (or being made to look disfunctional with the MSM) in one form or another Spain , Germany , France ,Italy (Belisconie was rolled for trying to protect Italy ! ) , Canada ,Australia .BUT so much of the disfunction is a factor of prestitute magnification and spin ; agitprop pure and simple . 

The real disfunction is the horrific immigration rates of peoples of completely different genetic makeup and culture-religions .This deliberately destructive immigration is making the Caucasion Democracies unworkable , which is exactly what this Masonic rats are trying to do . They are going to 'save us' from the chaos they are causing but setting up a Masonic Dictatorship . Once martial law is declared , by virtue of declaration of war against Russia , then all internet freedoms will be stripped away and discenters and knowers will be arrested (or murdered ) like me . Then the MSM media will suddenly start promoting an illusion perfect harmony and good gov by trusted officals  

The sheeple just don't get that this slavish organization has millions and millions of members across the West and the organization is broken up into thousands of differant branches and sub orders penertrating all public organization (I seen it I know)  . The only people within this organization that really know whats going on is the Illuminati heads , everyone else down the Masonic ladder is either under deception or (as in the case of many politicans) blackmail . And this organization is ruthless in its quest for world domination or as they imagine it 'the brotherhood of humanity' breeding humans to a brown uniform standard  ; that is whats left of humanity . The obelisk represents fertility = Nature = good and bad or perditor and prey ; thus they have decided to rule by controlling bad and using it to attack 'bad' , which conviently represents anybody that opposes their organization . 

ByTheCross's picture

Covert world domination is superior to overt, so you're barking up the wrong tree there.

jin187's picture

The only hole in the theory of the Illuminati controlling everything, is that if they are unhappy with the current state of affairs, why did they let it get that way? Why not simply continue running the world as the Romans, Holy Romans, Spanish, or British? They let the empires they control collapse, just so they can control, and then collapse the next one? Let the internet be built, just so they can ruin it a few decades later? Sounds like it's run by cartoon villains.

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ForTheEvulz

https://imgur.com/7VVnjDO

ByTheCross's picture

Well, there's your dilemma: either they're a bunch of cartoon villains missing out on your insight, or they're not, and it's actually you who's missing something - something *crucial*.

falak pema's picture

Nigel Farage, Puigdemont and the Duck are three of a kind.

They start forest fires and then run for their lives.

"Its not me, THEM!"...

Irresponsibility and manic ego trips, with total under the carpet scamming behind the curtain, 'cos in fact they are blue-blooded Oligarchs behind their veneer of populist leaders; so called bleeding hearts of swamp clearers to free the Deplorables; some Internet scam worthy of a Nigerian trickster "I have a gold mine for which I need a 1000$ to start up. Send me the money and you will be rich beyond your dreams".

Only its in BILLIONS  for these political T-rexs, as they ruin the world.

And those guys in Philippines, Nork, Stamboul, Tel Aviv, Damascus, Cairo... and you name it; 'cos its now a world disease; live by the same rules.

The Duck is now a truly global world icon, a trademark for manic irresponsibility : #MAGA !

Duck Dynasty! 

DelusionsCrowded's picture

I agree . There was always something too brave and bold and certain (almost demogogic) about Farage . Though it is possible he is just a mad egotistal clever ass the establishement let push the Brexist smokescreen hoax over the line . You know , give the mob something to root for . 

He might have lost favour for helping Trump and has realized he'd better disappear or end up a chicken for monkey's . 

 

malek's picture

Don't you love a nice statist viewpoint!

Because
- forest fires never start by natural causes
- the large amount of tinder built up is the fault of... nobody.

Joe A's picture

Excellent video but I miss the "I fart in your general direction" part.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QSo0duY7-9s