America's New "Trick" To Beat Black Friday Crowds: Wear Employee Uniforms

Tyler Durden's picture

US shoppers’ lust for Black Friday bargains this year has reached absurd new levels, evidenced by a viral joke that morphed into a disturbing new trend to help shoppers beat Wal-Mart and other big box store crowds by disguising themselves as temporary holiday employees. It started when Twitter user @OverlyLiked announcing he would be selling his Walmart vest for $100.

“I’m selling this Walmart vest for $100,” he wrote. “Use it to skip the line during Black Friday. You can even walk in, grab what you want, and walk out."

Although the tweet was reportedly meant as a joke, earning @OverlyLiked more than 30,000 retweets and almost 80,000 likes, it wasn’t long before he was being inundated with real requests to buy his shirt.

“The popularity of the tweet really did not surprise me… What shocked me was the news coverage of that,” @OverlyLiked told RT, explaining that apart from the bidders, he was also sought out by numerous media outlets covering the story.

But @OverlyLiked’s disappointed would-be buyers didn’t need to wait long for other offers to materialize. It seems former and current Wal-Mart employees quickly caught on to the idea and began selling their own uniforms in earnest...

 

 

While others went out looking for them,

Meanwhile, Walmart has apparently caught on to the hustle, and has asked its employees to “question” anyone they see wearing one of their vests, but whom they do not recognize.

The American “Black Friday” tradition has intensified in recent years as big-box stores have sought to fend off the encroaching “Cyber Monday” when shoppers order all their items online - read Amazon - instead of trudging through massive crowds at Wal-Mart, Best Buy or any other retail mecca. Retailers typically open late Thursday evening, before the holiday has even ended, to offer massive bargains, prompting nationwide anarchy as dozens of stories and videos emerge of shoppers fighting one another for the cheapest deals on anything from blenders to widescreen TV’s to underwear. The insanity of Black Friday was perhaps encapsulated best by this meme that made the rounds a few years back:


 

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boattrash's picture

Shopping online is another way...

shitshitshit's picture

Greed is the pinnacle of humanity.

This is absolute moral bankruptcy if you consider the level of ignorance and stupidity that come along.

Up next, fake firemen/policemen/military?

Idiocracy was just too gentle of an oultlook on the future of this fucked up country.

 

 

Pandelis's picture

that is smart, a new innovation  lets hope the jihadis do not get a hold of these walmart uniform and we think it is a domestic terrorist

bluez's picture

I see they sell cheap guns at Walmart. Probably bump stocks too.

The perfect narrative.

I won't be there.

Rule Your School, baby!

https://www.cnbc.com/2017/08/10/wal-mart-back-to-school-signs-hung-above...

Paul Kersey's picture

Nothing illustrates how far this country has fallen like a herd of land manatees storming the doors at Walmart on Black Friday, to fight over shit they don't need, paying for it with money they don't have, to impress other land manatees they don't like.

RafterManFMJ's picture

You forgot to mention the smell

ufos8mycow's picture

Amateurs...I wore my Bill Clinton mask and walked right through the front doors while waving at the crowd and screaming "TITTIES AND BEER!!". I then proceeded to sexually harass the greeter & the asst. manager before I grabbed a case of beer and a 55" TV and walked out without paying.

I stuck my finger in the cashier's ass for good measure too.

 

Rock solid alibi.

Mr Hankey's picture

LOL.Threw the loot in the back of your '69 El Camino w/ astroturf in the bed & outtathere.Any peeps got a problem w/ dat have assadint.

Delving Eye's picture

@ PAUL KERSEY: You had me ROTFL at "land manatee."

Everyman's picture

At Paul,

 

BEST COMMENT EVEAH!!!!!!!!

Hari_Seldon's picture

So you've met my first wife, haven't you?

HisNameIsRP's picture

 

"I’m tryna test something out black Friday"  good one

Déjà view's picture

Black plague...Walmart bullet proof vest option?

847328_3527's picture

Hilarious black Mama caught shoplifting at IKEA denying it while you can see the 18" frying pan sticking out of her ass!

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uNwcYXd1Oo

BandGap's picture

Land Manatees. Thatr will work its way into my personal lexicon.

Urban Commando is another (aka homeless men).

krispkritter's picture

 "Landatees" Friend gave his working big Sony projection TV to a douche who didn't have a dime to his name.  Douche gave up the free TV and fought hand-to-hand for a bigger LED TV on BF to play his Xbox on only to get a 90 day warrantee for the new TV and then posted on FB(I was sent the screen grabs) that his new TV died like 4 months later.  The Sony was still running but he bitched like a POS that he got fucked on the deal.  Currently well in debt, soon to be divorced, and still an asshole.

Blankenstein's picture

What do you have against manatees?   

Mr Hankey's picture

A few well-placed claymores are a great anti-personell weapon,wonder why some jihadi ,I mean spooks,     hasn't done a bunch of Walmartians on Black Friday yet.

Giant Meteor's picture

By even a cursory examination, and likely to a quite large extent, the plebians understand old rules no longer apply . The socio economic structure and presumed "leadership" is merely a mirror reflection of society writ large. As Carlin once pointed out, the congress critters, intellectuals, thought leaders and such come from American families. The apple doesn't fall very far from the tree .. Lawlessness at the top of the food chain, begets lawlessness at the bottom ..

I do not point to this as excuse, merely a simple fact of  life, human nature, as you have mentioned ..  when in Rome.

A great many years, and much effort, energy expended, on marginalizing what was once called, good moral conduct.

The line has been smashed, a veil lifted, and there are no good guys in white hats gonna ride on in and save the day .

Sword of the Spirit's picture

Sad, but spot-on.

America has gone the way of Rome, and will as well reap what she has sown. 

Mr Hankey's picture

"YEAAH BAY-BAY!!!!

BURN,BABY,BURN!!!!!!

Hal n back's picture

a nation without laws or integrity.

SilverDoctors's picture

Babylon indeed, and Babylon is about to fall. 

I RAISE UP NATIONS...AND I DESTROY THEM...I WILL SET YOU AS AN EXAMPLE TO THE WHOLE WORLD

 

I, Mashiach, the King of all creation, the Only Savior for mankind, scour the earth, looking for those who embrace My Truth. 

The warnings from My messengers and prophets have been declared for many generations and now, as you see, the time has come for all to be fulfilled.

The cries of the broken and contrite of heart have been heard in Heaven, and the Just Judge of all now brings recompense where it is due. 

As a loving Father of His children, My heart longs to see hearts desperate for truth, hearts that cry out to Me through the destruction and through their sufferings; but as I look, I see many more still numb to the truth that has been presented, and I see them placing their hopes and dependence on man-made systems. I do not see many people falling on their knees in repentance, nor looking to Me for their hope, protection and provisions. Your leaders, America do not publicly cry out to Me in prayer for your nation, nor do they stand for truth based in My Holy Word. I hear words again such as, 'We will rebuild and restore,' but I tell you, this will not be. For as the sun rises in the east and sets in the west, so shall I allow the judgments to sweep this nation from coast to coast, as Babylon the whore will fall. You will not rise again to a mighty nation, but I will burn you with fire and destroy you with terrible winds and floods, bringing great devastation to your land. I will set you as an example to the whole world, what will be the end of all those mock and scoff Me and blatantly disregard My commandments.

This is not all I will do. You have only now just begun to see the shaking I will cause, as the earth will also violently respond to My commands for justice. I alone can raise up nations, and I alone can bring them down. I will shake the heavens and I will shake the earth and all that is will be undone. 

A serious and dire message this is indeed, but as I have spoken, the time is come. I hear the heart cries of those who seek Me and love Me with all they have, and you My precious ones shall see much, but only for a short while, and then I will draw you to Myself. Do not despair My faithful ones, do not lose hope, for you know that I must do what I must do. I do these things to test and to measure the heart motives of all men. 

I see all and I hear all, and I have each and every outcome. Nothing escapes the Great I AM. 

Prepare in repentance, fasting and prayer first, then prepare as you are able physically, knowing that I have My children's  names written in the palm of My hand, and no evil will befall you. Your security is in Me, regardless of what you see around you and what is imminently coming upon you. 

Watch, wait, pray My loves. Your King is coming for you. Can you not hear the armies of Heaven as they ride? 

YAHUSHUA, YOUR KING, YOUR DEFENSE, YOUR ROCK, YOUR HIGH TOWER, YOUR REFUGE

http://iamcallingyounow.blogspot.com/2017/09/i-raise-up-nationsand-i-des...
Sword of the Spirit's picture

Amen.  That site is one of a small handful of sources online where true prophetic words from the Lord are spoken. 

Mr Hankey's picture

Yup,god wrote the buy-bull.In 1 hour.While drunk.& diddling a little boy.Before eating him.

Mr Hankey's picture

Oh,HAY-ZOOS HECTOR CHRISTO ,SCOURGED& TACKED,STUFF A CUT-DICK IN IT!!!!!

Sword of the Spirit's picture

Agreed. 

In actuality, America is Babylon the Great (Revelation 17:5).

Rikky's picture

there are many theories as to who Babylon is the most popular the Catholic Church.

Mr Hankey's picture

Why does it have to be one centralized entity?

Pernicious Gold Phallusy's picture

My copy doesn't say that. Is it in your footnotes? The Mormons I know say Babylon is the Catholic Church. The Catholics say it's the Protestant churches. There seem to be a fair number of different opinions and John isn't around to explain further.

old_cynic's picture

A nation that has largely turned its back on Christ.

Mr Hankey's picture

Plenty of real ex-cop-soldier-.gov diabetic fatasses stuck in the Li'l Rascal traffic jam.Spending MY money.

yogibear's picture

Up" next, fake firemen/policemen/military"

Already been happening.

ZH Snob's picture

or better yet, turn your back on materialism and don't buy anything you don't really need.

Magnum's picture

Today I’m hauling shit I don’t need to the dump or Salvation Army. Not buying anything. Nice way to spend this day off.

mkkby's picture

Why shop when it's crowded?

Do people ENJOY being miserable, run over by low life dindus, standing in line like cattle, for shelves that will mostly be empty?

Somebody needs to explain this to me. Guess the herd instinct is strong in sheeple.

Miffed Microbiologist's picture

I believe God placed stupid people on earth for our entertainment. So just watch the Roman Colosseum idiocy on TV over a few beers. Too bad they don't throw in a few lions to make it more fun.

Miffed;-)

Parrotile's picture

Or, but things that have use other than entertainment value. Over the years we've picked up some remarkably good bargains in the "non-electronic" camping and DIY categories - things that are no longer "fashionable" but still perfectly useful (e.g. traditional rather than "digital" metrology instruments)

Schlep2's picture

Just starve the beast, and if you do need something shop mom and pop.

Fireman's picture

 

Walfart day is every day. Welcome to the end stage of the USSAN hog farm experiment.

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/

tmosley's picture

Amazon stores already have this handled.

Surprised it took this long for the FSA to figure this out. Walmart is going to have to do a major overhaul on its security now. I guess they could afford the big bucks to bring in some machine learning people to get them set up.

Positive side effect being of such a system is that creeps trying to molest women or children can be easily caught too. The store itself is always watching.

duo's picture

There's tens of thousands of TSA uniforms out there from employees that quit, lost them, etc.  I guess we need a major overhaul of airport security.

tmosley's picture

Can you imagine? ML could be used for that too. Make security seamless for everyone else, but the second someone goes in with machine-detectible bad intentions, security appears out of nowhere to take them for questioning.

Yogizuna's picture

Security guard uniforms also.

b-sugar's picture

is this reddit for edgy teenagers? goddamn, i know thanksgiving is a slow weekend but damn

overmedicatedundersexed's picture

amazon free return policy..now that has possibilities..like the lady who wore the new dress to the ball and returned it the next day..it's only fair.

walmart will take back anything - but the lines are long..LOL

b-sugar's picture

same for eBooks... meaning they will have to pay you back if you don't want the file you've already transfered somewhere else.