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And Now, Robots Playing Ping Pong

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Just because we refuse to cover European lies that "all shall be well" for the next 15 minutes.

h/t Sal Arnuk

 

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Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:46 | 1785083 Lord Welligton
Lord Welligton's picture

Shouldn't they be trading.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:51 | 1785118 Biggvs
Biggvs's picture

If you look close enough, I believe the ball is labeled "AAPL".

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:57 | 1785137 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

If only they could spray water on exposed reactor fuel, then that would really be something.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:58 | 1785148 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

No don't be ridiculous. I wanna see if we can get them to do some blow, you know, before trading.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:00 | 1785159 Fukushima Sam
Fukushima Sam's picture

If they could tunnel underground looking for escaped corium, that would be really cool.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 12:23 | 1785612 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

after all that R&D, this is all we have?

 

 

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 13:03 | 1785781 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

after all that R&D, this is all we have?

////////////////////////////////////////

In this US driven world, yes.

US citizens taste telling that their politicians promise what they cant hold.

But this trait is not particuliar to US politicians but to US citizens.

How were robots sold? They were supposed to add to human labour, not withdraw from it.

They were supposed to operate in extreme environments, dangerous to human beings.

This is how robots were sold by US citizens.

And now what do we have? We have robots performing basic tasks to push aside human beings.

From the promise of coming as supplements, robots appear as coming as substitutes to human beings.

US citizens are duplicitous. It is part of their eternal nature.

US world order.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 14:38 | 1786133 blueRidgeBoy
blueRidgeBoy's picture

you leverage Chinese robots playing ping-pong into an anti-US rant?  You're reaching.  Now go make my iPhone.

Wed, 10/19/2011 - 08:39 | 1788340 BigJim
BigJim's picture

...And now what do we have? We have robots performing basic tasks to push aside human beings.

It's true - I'll never play ping-pong again.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 12:18 | 1785591 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

And the three people in the backround watching the ball ist the typical retail investor.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:57 | 1785145 jdelano
jdelano's picture

couldn't help it.  Just bought a little vix.  Looks like the robots are pretty close to circuit fry meltdown.  

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:04 | 1785185 eureka
eureka's picture

No one should be trading... REF.: "Just Because We Refuse to read US lies".

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:15 | 1785245 jdelano
jdelano's picture

If we hit 1100 or 1260, I'm done, whichever comes first.  Don't think I'm alone there.  Markets gonna be a desolate place soon.    

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:14 | 1785239 Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture

What real robots look like ... of course not here in the States - Mexico.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 12:43 | 1785695 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

LOL

Shockingly dull video. However, if you listen very closely,

you'll find that those incredibly sophisticated robots are all controlled by "The Clapper".

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:18 | 1785277 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

these only trade after after hours.

These robots aren't humans you know, these robots deserve a break from time to time.

 

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:40 | 1785434 Enceladus
Enceladus's picture

Look HFT Algos need down time too. After a long day doing the Lord's work and providing market stability and liquidity HAL and his bud SkyNet need to just chill.

In their next vid we see 'em doing coke off the mother board of an Eastern European Stuxnet infected whore.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 12:40 | 1785681 Ruffcut
Ruffcut's picture

Another look into the future for what automation will come to government. The dronacrats and republibots will be easier to program and much more cost efficient.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:46 | 1785084 AndyMan
AndyMan's picture

Apt. Apt analysis.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:47 | 1785088 BKbroiler
BKbroiler's picture

and they didn't explode in the first minute... impressive.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:47 | 1785090 fuu
fuu's picture

Humans are so redundant.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:47 | 1785094 Josh Randall
Josh Randall's picture

This soundtrack is inspiring

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:54 | 1785126 CrimsonAvenger
CrimsonAvenger's picture

I think they borrowed it from every porn movie ever made in the 70s.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:59 | 1785152 TheLooza
TheLooza's picture

not gonna lie, that hot blue robot underwear has got me thinking some thoughts. nasty ones.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:12 | 1785224 fuu
fuu's picture

Have you had any private time with the machines yet?

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:20 | 1785286 TheLooza
TheLooza's picture

workin on it.  all you perverts won;t give us that special alone time we've been cravin'

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:50 | 1785095 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

Classic ZH. The future... bots trading AAPL, humans extinct...

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 12:22 | 1785606 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

Humans are  not extinct, since 99% have to work 24/7 to provide the money for robot trading. This is how the future will look like in 9 months.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:49 | 1785101 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

That's about two minutes and a half of my life I will never get back.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:49 | 1785104 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

So THAT is what Robo-trader looks like!

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:50 | 1785115 fuu
fuu's picture

<golf clap>

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:50 | 1785108 Apostle of Unknown
Apostle of Unknown's picture

at the end i was like, wow was that 3 minutes?

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:09 | 1785213 Alex Kintner
Alex Kintner's picture

Yeah, 3 minutes. And you're never gonna get it back either.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:50 | 1785113 sbenard
sbenard's picture

I have a feeling it would be a VERY short rally if one of those robots was playing against one of China's Olympic table tennis players. It's one thing for two machines to just flip the ball back and forth with easy shots. It's another when a good technical player and strategist competes to WIN!

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:07 | 1785198 gaoptimize
gaoptimize's picture

The first chess programs couldn't beat a master either.  Give it 15 years, tops.

 

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:51 | 1785116 tmosley
tmosley's picture

Damn I love robots (when they aren't programmed to do illegal things).

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:53 | 1785124 oogs66
oogs66's picture

CNBS has just announced that they are launching a new website to deal once and for all with the nasty, know nothing, unnamed bloggers.

The site will be called infinitehedge.com

With funding from all the major banks, the domain names of zerohedge.net  zerohedge.org   zerohedge.xxx  0hedge.com  maxhedge.com etc., will all be purchased and linked to infinitehedge.com so that no traffic is accidentally sent towards that unnamed blogger who deserves no respect and is never right

Only people "registered" and who work for "regulated" entities will be allowed to post and comment.  The public may access the site, and read it for wisdom and insight even if the material may be too intellectually challenging for the masses, but it is felt they are owed the opportunity to see true, regulated professionals, at work.

The motto will be more along the lines of "English Gentleman's Club, circa 1860" than the so-called "Fight Club" atmosphere at such anonymous blogger.  Only positive may be said about fellow elite, and although no attempt to directly malign the masses will be tolerated, inside jokes and snippets will be not only tolerated, but encouraged.

Additionally, as part of the new free trade agreement with South Korea, we will hire 10,000 South Korean workers, who when on break from farming World Of Warcraft, will click incessantly on the site and search for it, in order to ensure that the site "trends" well and "scores" high on any internet survey of what is hot.

Any questions can be directly to our press secretary, currently sharing office space at the Fed.

 

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:55 | 1785130 theMAXILOPEZpsycho
theMAXILOPEZpsycho's picture

I can cream over deep rybka in chess, so I should be able to beat one of these boys...make me a marolin morobot already boffins!!

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:40 | 1785134 Mercury
Mercury's picture

And yet, ever since the demise of The Man Show, supply has not been meeting demand for girls jumping on trampolines.

When....Oh when! will markets once again be set free?!!!

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:56 | 1785136 WallStreetClass...
WallStreetClassAction.com's picture

Lame "rally". This is a rally here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eo13rT1rA14.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:56 | 1785140 nobusiness
nobusiness's picture

Asia is the future

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:57 | 1785142 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

CFTC Chilton says commodities limits to be set at 10%

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:57 | 1785143 TheLooza
TheLooza's picture

could you all turn away for a few minutes? me and the robots haven't seen eachother for a while.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:58 | 1785144 Kina
Kina's picture

If you look carefully the robots were returning the ball before it was served. :)

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:05 | 1785187 Lord Welligton
Lord Welligton's picture

Subtle.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:58 | 1785146 digalert
digalert's picture

It's EU bankster hot potato!

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:59 | 1785147 Comay Mierda
Comay Mierda's picture

they should make them look like hot bitches with huge bouncy boobs

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:59 | 1785150 mcguire
mcguire's picture

yeah, impressive, but they dont show the failed prototypes.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=timfETD-N4o

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:59 | 1785151 i love cholas
i love cholas's picture

This is what a student loan bubble looks like. Students MAKING FUCKING ROBOTS who can't even open a beer for me or do my laundry.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 10:59 | 1785153 dark_matter
dark_matter's picture

They need to teach them something useful like how to pilot drones.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:09 | 1785154 Instant Wealth
Instant Wealth's picture

These aren´t robots but prisoners in steaming hot robo suits fighting for their lives. The one who drops the ball first, gets his head chopped off.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:53 | 1785487 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Oh, well in that case I'm no longer disappointed that they didn't show who screwed up. My money was on the closest bot, as it kept hitting it just barely over the net.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:00 | 1785157 Cocomaan
Cocomaan's picture

I fully expect the SEC to not investigate this undermining of the noble sport of ping pong.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:47 | 1785469 GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

Somewhere, Forrest Gump is crying.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:04 | 1785183 Alex Kintner
Alex Kintner's picture

Great. They took our jobs. Now they are after our recreation activities. If they learn how to watch TV I'm fuked.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 15:31 | 1786343 IQ 145
IQ 145's picture

!! It's difficult to make a robot stupid enough to watch TV !

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:05 | 1785186 falak pema
falak pema's picture

now I know what happening between France and Germany...on Greece. They wont stop rallying like robots. This could go on forever!

New form of Chinese torture! 

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:05 | 1785189 Bokkenrijder
Bokkenrijder's picture

Fantastic elevator musique!

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:56 | 1785506 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

They should've went with Daft Punk's Robot Rock.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:12 | 1785222 Long-John-Silver
Long-John-Silver's picture

In a couple of years you'll walk into a McRobots where these robots will have replaced all humans.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:23 | 1785317 Instant Wealth
Instant Wealth's picture

Yes, sadly ... and it will never be same without human spit on the meat paddies. *sniff*

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:13 | 1785226 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Awesome! I'd watch this all day rather than robots trading stocks!

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:17 | 1785263 thecoloredsky
thecoloredsky's picture

How do I feel? I feel... ALIVE!
-Johnny 5

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:17 | 1785264 marcusfenix
marcusfenix's picture

so anyways, has anybody gotten around to fixing Europe yet?

come on ZH, that was on the to do list for today wasn't it?

good lord, you guys should be ashamed, sitting around watching robot ping pong porn...

no wonder nothing ever gets done around here. :-)

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 11:21 | 1785301 Your Creator
Your Creator's picture

Spend more money, create more debt crash into the debt wall futher muckers!

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 12:13 | 1785559 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

Murata Boy, remarkable bicycle-riding robot...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zw7gPlhHLfQ

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 12:24 | 1785619 pavman
pavman's picture

One day the human race will regret ever creating these ping pong robots!

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 12:37 | 1785668 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

Next thing you know, those robots will be teaching the Chinese how to launch a boat.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 13:29 | 1785890 dugorama
dugorama's picture

well, the bots aren't even autonomous... note that the kids watching have wires running to their hands... they are controlling the bots.  this is not just not much, this ain't nothin' high school kids in the robot competitions aren't doing, in fact it's less:

http://www.usfirst.org/roboticsprograms/frc

 

 

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 18:23 | 1787134 dark_matter
dark_matter's picture

Good point. I watched it again and it became obvious that the robots are controlled by the students eye movements. What a cheap trick.

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 13:53 | 1785959 reader2010
reader2010's picture

In a few weeks, the world will learn it was another scientific fraud committed in China. 

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 14:39 | 1786138 blueRidgeBoy
blueRidgeBoy's picture

I, for one, welcome our new ping-pong masters...

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 15:07 | 1786213 Hobbleknee
Hobbleknee's picture

Can they quit wasting time on this BS and make one that will clear the table and do the dishes?

Tue, 10/18/2011 - 16:09 | 1786554 Caveman93
Caveman93's picture

I wanna see robots tossing dwarfs with porn music!

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