And Now, Robots Playing Ping Pong

Tyler Durden's picture

Just because we refuse to cover European lies that "all shall be well" for the next 15 minutes.

h/t Sal Arnuk

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Lord Welligton's picture

Shouldn't they be trading.

Biggvs's picture

If you look close enough, I believe the ball is labeled "AAPL".

hedgeless_horseman's picture

If only they could spray water on exposed reactor fuel, then that would really be something.

GeneMarchbanks's picture

No don't be ridiculous. I wanna see if we can get them to do some blow, you know, before trading.

Fukushima Sam's picture

If they could tunnel underground looking for escaped corium, that would be really cool.

AldousHuxley's picture

after all that R&D, this is all we have?



AnAnonymous's picture

after all that R&D, this is all we have?


In this US driven world, yes.

US citizens taste telling that their politicians promise what they cant hold.

But this trait is not particuliar to US politicians but to US citizens.

How were robots sold? They were supposed to add to human labour, not withdraw from it.

They were supposed to operate in extreme environments, dangerous to human beings.

This is how robots were sold by US citizens.

And now what do we have? We have robots performing basic tasks to push aside human beings.

From the promise of coming as supplements, robots appear as coming as substitutes to human beings.

US citizens are duplicitous. It is part of their eternal nature.

US world order.

blueRidgeBoy's picture

you leverage Chinese robots playing ping-pong into an anti-US rant?  You're reaching.  Now go make my iPhone.

BigJim's picture

...And now what do we have? We have robots performing basic tasks to push aside human beings.

It's true - I'll never play ping-pong again.

Bunga Bunga's picture

And the three people in the backround watching the ball ist the typical retail investor.

jdelano's picture

couldn't help it.  Just bought a little vix.  Looks like the robots are pretty close to circuit fry meltdown.  

eureka's picture

No one should be trading... REF.: "Just Because We Refuse to read US lies".

jdelano's picture

If we hit 1100 or 1260, I'm done, whichever comes first.  Don't think I'm alone there.  Markets gonna be a desolate place soon.    

Taint Boil's picture

What real robots look like ... of course not here in the States - Mexico.

Schmuck Raker's picture


Shockingly dull video. However, if you listen very closely,

you'll find that those incredibly sophisticated robots are all controlled by "The Clapper".

Sudden Debt's picture

these only trade after after hours.

These robots aren't humans you know, these robots deserve a break from time to time.


Enceladus's picture

Look HFT Algos need down time too. After a long day doing the Lord's work and providing market stability and liquidity HAL and his bud SkyNet need to just chill.

In their next vid we see 'em doing coke off the mother board of an Eastern European Stuxnet infected whore.

Ruffcut's picture

Another look into the future for what automation will come to government. The dronacrats and republibots will be easier to program and much more cost efficient.

AndyMan's picture

Apt. Apt analysis.

BKbroiler's picture

and they didn't explode in the first minute... impressive.

fuu's picture

Humans are so redundant.

Josh Randall's picture

This soundtrack is inspiring

CrimsonAvenger's picture

I think they borrowed it from every porn movie ever made in the 70s.

TheLooza's picture

not gonna lie, that hot blue robot underwear has got me thinking some thoughts. nasty ones.

fuu's picture

Have you had any private time with the machines yet?

TheLooza's picture

workin on it.  all you perverts won;t give us that special alone time we've been cravin'

GeneMarchbanks's picture

Classic ZH. The future... bots trading AAPL, humans extinct...

Bunga Bunga's picture

Humans are  not extinct, since 99% have to work 24/7 to provide the money for robot trading. This is how the future will look like in 9 months.

Dr. Engali's picture

That's about two minutes and a half of my life I will never get back.

slaughterer's picture

So THAT is what Robo-trader looks like!

Apostle of Unknown's picture

at the end i was like, wow was that 3 minutes?

Alex Kintner's picture

Yeah, 3 minutes. And you're never gonna get it back either.

sbenard's picture

I have a feeling it would be a VERY short rally if one of those robots was playing against one of China's Olympic table tennis players. It's one thing for two machines to just flip the ball back and forth with easy shots. It's another when a good technical player and strategist competes to WIN!

gaoptimize's picture

The first chess programs couldn't beat a master either.  Give it 15 years, tops.


tmosley's picture

Damn I love robots (when they aren't programmed to do illegal things).

oogs66's picture

CNBS has just announced that they are launching a new website to deal once and for all with the nasty, know nothing, unnamed bloggers.

The site will be called

With funding from all the major banks, the domain names of etc., will all be purchased and linked to so that no traffic is accidentally sent towards that unnamed blogger who deserves no respect and is never right

Only people "registered" and who work for "regulated" entities will be allowed to post and comment.  The public may access the site, and read it for wisdom and insight even if the material may be too intellectually challenging for the masses, but it is felt they are owed the opportunity to see true, regulated professionals, at work.

The motto will be more along the lines of "English Gentleman's Club, circa 1860" than the so-called "Fight Club" atmosphere at such anonymous blogger.  Only positive may be said about fellow elite, and although no attempt to directly malign the masses will be tolerated, inside jokes and snippets will be not only tolerated, but encouraged.

Additionally, as part of the new free trade agreement with South Korea, we will hire 10,000 South Korean workers, who when on break from farming World Of Warcraft, will click incessantly on the site and search for it, in order to ensure that the site "trends" well and "scores" high on any internet survey of what is hot.

Any questions can be directly to our press secretary, currently sharing office space at the Fed.


theMAXILOPEZpsycho's picture

I can cream over deep rybka in chess, so I should be able to beat one of these boys...make me a marolin morobot already boffins!!

Mercury's picture

And yet, ever since the demise of The Man Show, supply has not been meeting demand for girls jumping on trampolines.

When....Oh when! will markets once again be set free?!!!

nobusiness's picture

Asia is the future

Temporalist's picture

CFTC Chilton says commodities limits to be set at 10%

TheLooza's picture

could you all turn away for a few minutes? me and the robots haven't seen eachother for a while.

Kina's picture

If you look carefully the robots were returning the ball before it was served. :)

digalert's picture

It's EU bankster hot potato!

Comay Mierda's picture

they should make them look like hot bitches with huge bouncy boobs

mcguire's picture

yeah, impressive, but they dont show the failed prototypes..

i love cholas's picture

This is what a student loan bubble looks like. Students MAKING FUCKING ROBOTS who can't even open a beer for me or do my laundry.