Any North Koreans Found Not To Have Cried Hystrically At Kim Jong-Il's Passing May Spend 6 Months In A Labor Camp

Tyler Durden's picture

Well, it is a slow news day, so we focus on the patently absurd, such as this news out of Interfax confirming that TheOnion can now close up shop as reality is far, far better. From Interfax: "North Korean citizens, who did not take part in the mourning ceremonies for the country’s late Leader Kim Jong-il, are facing up to six months in labor camps, Interfax reported January 11. According to the South Korean media sources, “People’s Courts” took place all over the country starting December 29 to condemn those who did not show enough emotion after the death of “the great leader” Kim Jong-il. The People’s Court hearings were reportedly over by January 8. The behavior of those people, who criticized the three-generation principle of ruling the country, was also a matter of discussion during the court meetings.  It was reported earlier that 2012 calendars were fully taken out of stores because the date of death of the late Leader Kim Jong-il was not marked in them." That said, we doubt anyone will punish the capital markets for crying hysterically should Bernanke's printer finally kicks the ghost.

More brainwashed theater below - the guy at 1:23 minutes in however is sure to get an extra portion of rice for his performance:

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firstdivision's picture

Coming soon to America.

??'s picture

already here

San Mateo  January 11, 2012

Man gets 35 to life for theft from dog-walking clients ($5,000)

mandatory - no parole for 30 years

trav7777's picture

2 minutes of hate, throw your shoes at Emmanuel or else!

How many fingers do you see, bitchez?

Hugh G Rection's picture

Throw your shoe at a Mossad spy like Emmanuel, and expect a white panel van snatch team outside your house.

TruthInSunshine's picture

This reminds me of ObaMao's Informal Inauguration in Chicago, with tears of joy, flowing down the faces, against a stage & props (like huge, styrofoam/EIFS Roman Columns) lifted right from a broadway production of Julius Caesar. Hope & Change (now hopeless without spare change) ringing loudly sharply in the cold November Chicago air:


Anyways, since this is a slow news day, and going off topic, I have proof that The Mayans were correct in their assessment and timing:

Twinkies maker Hostess seeks bankruptcy protection


It's the first step of 'no more twinkies.' If they don't fix this company and maintain production, who will deliver the indispensable, nutritionally dense, spong cake filled with Great Stuff foam that can be used for insulation & as a fire retardant, to the Amerikan Sheople?

Twinkies got Bernank'd.

i-dog's picture

They created it. Obama bought it from them!

General Decline's picture

My family and I were on vacation over Christmas break and the TV in the breakfest area in the hotel we stayed was tuned to CNN. (I would never turn that crap on in my own home) They were, that morning, showing video footage of Kim's funeral.  My 11 year old saw the people's exagerated reaction to his death and looked at me with a puzzled face.  He said "Dad, why are those people acting like that?" I expalined to him what kind of regime those people live under in N. Korea and if they didn't pretend to be so upset, they would probably be killed or arrested.  I will use this ZH article, tonight,  as an excellent example to teach him of they kind of propoganda he will be facing as he goes through his adult life. 

Teach your children to be wisely skeptical.  It's up to you as a parent. They don't teach that skill in public school.

The Big Ching-aso's picture



When asked, I would've told them I threw up during the ceremonies because of nausea caused by so much grief.


Momauguin Joe's picture

I recall reading Solzhenitsyn's 2nd or 3rd hand description of a party meeting wherein the Great Stalin appeared at the head table. Supposedly, all rose and cheered; enthusiatic clapping erupted. The clapping continued, 5 minutes, 10, 15 minutes! None dared stop clapping for fear of being accused of some bogus antiparty sentiment and being thrown into the labor camps.  People began collapsing from the stress. Finally, someone stopped clapping and everybody else soon followed and sat down. Afterwards, the clap stopper was charged and sentenced to 10 years hard labor. 


trav7777's picture

and not ONE person in the room wanted to clap, yet the system put them to death (by other people who agreed with them) if they did not conform to something that NO PERSON desired to conform to.

Haddock's picture

And here is ZH, mocking the current generation of poor fuckers who have to live the lie under the same shit.

Shame on Tyler for the angle of attack in this post.

BigJim's picture

I notice a lot of people in the video have their hands clapped over their mouths - I presume this is to hide their giggling at the ridiculousness of 'mourning' for their chief oppressor.

Eternalko's picture

Dear Momauguin Joe,

I consider ZH as place where you meet some more intelligent people capable of reasoning. So please, let me consider your story not as bullshiting, but as lack of knowledge about the period and Solzhenitsyn himself.

First of all Solzhenitsyn is a liar. He was caught lying so many times, that they’ve published some books where true historians scientifically point where he is wrong, where he is lying and where he is clearly out of his mind. Really. The guy was telling that 50 mln. where sitting in gulags. That’s like every second man, woman and child in exUSSR. Totally nuts.

Secondly, such as stories as this “clapping story” really could not take place. Really. Better not say such things in public.

Sorry for this “lesson”.

Conrad Murray's picture

Is it any wonder there is so much hate in the world when the president won a Nobel Peace Prize for conducting wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya, Pakistan, all over Africa, and who knows where else.

Or when his wife was a person who never had been proud of America?

Or that Barry Soetoro's pastor of 20+ years, Jeremiah Wright, is more racist than any klansman has ever been? Don't believe it, see for yourself -

Hugh_Jorgan's picture

Be careful, the Anointed One has many eyes and ears...

Blano's picture

Not nearly as large as his wife's ass.

brew's picture

musta got junked by a woman with a big ass...

Randall Cabot's picture

Or a guy who likes women with a big ass.

john39's picture

Didn't that dirtball kissinger win one of those as well?  i think that says it all.

Randall Cabot's picture

And the jew supremacist terrorist Menachem Begin.

covsire's picture

Since you're about to be an arugula farmer and bon-bon maker for the rest of your life in a dark corner of the Obamatopia, can I have your stuff?

DionysusDevotee's picture

Damn, you beat me to it.  Was gonna say; "Wow, its the opposite of hate week."

Zero Debt's picture

But if your name is Jon Corzine it is A-OK to steal a billion dollars of commodities from segregated accounts.

"We don't know where the money is!"

Commander Cody's picture

No parole?  That's OK, because he'll be released when the jails fill up again and they declare another jail "holiday".

Dark Space's picture

Whoa - this is no Jean Valjean. This was the 6th (SIXTH) conviction he had for burglarizing people's homes, and his defense stated "Thompson said his client was not a career criminal and that he was simply attracted to “shiny things.”... yeah, the burglaries that he actually got caught for started when he was teenager, expanded over a  15 year period, picked up steam with 4 convictions in 2009, and culminated with this 6th conviction in which he was attracted to the shiny things that he later sold to a pawn shop. I cannot imagine a better place for this guy to be then in prison.

Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

TPTB need to take a salt bath and turn up the Lorenna McKennitt.  They take this whole thought control thing way to seriously.  Afterall, they, through their Scull and Bones fantasy, know that it's ashes to ashes.  So why they care so much just seems like a waste of a great amount of energy.

Don Birnam's picture

Meanwhile, back across the Pacific...

There will be no Order of Lenin awarded "Red" Rick Santorum, for his gulag-meriting finish in New Hampshire.

Hugh G Rection's picture

"And the winner is, David.....Cook!"


Archuleta fans were grief-stricken beyond despondence after the earth shattering news.

I don't know which is more ridiculous.

SheepDog-One's picture

And just think...6 months in a hard labor camp is considered a pretty sweet gig in N Korea!

Hugh_Jorgan's picture

Three hots and a cot... or something like that

trav7777's picture

uh, no it isn't.  Try rocks and punishment for eating bugs you can find.

Labor camps are places in PRK where you go and never come back from.

viahj's picture

at least you'll have the company of your entire family

TruthInSunshine's picture

Yes, solidarity confinement.

DaveyJones's picture

if I laugh till I cry, do I get credit for time served? 

brew's picture

this post is hilarious.  i'm glad i belong to the 1% of non-retards...

covsire's picture

The worst of it was those communist, leftist cows on the View praising this shitbag leader who needed a patriotic bullet in his head 40 years ago.  Kinda tells you how anything is possible, even in western society, when shitbag leftists can't see the evil in front of their faces.

Freddie's picture

Already here.  Annoced yesterday that DHS is monitoring journalists comments.  I thought it was a joke at first.  I wish it was.  Hope & Change.  

Beard of Zeus's picture

No joke.

Coming soon to a country near you:

Any Americans Found Not To Have Shown Sufficient Respect and Deference Towards Jews-Africans-Hispanics-Asians-Muslims-Homosexuals-Women, etc., May Spend 6 Months In A Labor Camp.

Eally Ucked's picture

Oh, give me a fucken break with news like that.

Max Hunter's picture

In America, if you don't like someone or something, you are called a racist..  I have to admit, that's less severe..  Aren't we lucky..

Azannoth's picture

Western version: "anyone found not crying at the Anniversary of Auschwitz Liberation will be sentenced to 6 months community service in a black neighborhood"