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Deus Ex Alpha Centauri: Buy Euros Now As SETI May Have Discovered Aliens
It just may turn out that Europe's strategic "plan" of kicking the can down the road indefinitely, or at least until aliens can come down and bail out the global central banking cabal - aka the Deus Ex Alpha Centauri plan - may have worked! In a rather curious announcement, the SETI website of UC Berkeley has announced that it has found signals that "look similar to what we think might be produced from an extraterrestrial technology. They are narrow in frequency, much narrower than would be produced by any known astrophysical phenomena, and they drift in frequency with time, as we would expect because of the doppler effect imposed by the relative motion of the transmitter and the receiving radio telescope." And in the off case that said aliens prove to have an atavism to rude European waiters, at least Paul Krugman will be delighted: after all there is nothing better for the economic voodoo shamans out there than intergallactic warfare. Then again, since Keynesianism appears to be a popular universal delusion, we wouldn't be surprised if it is us who ends up having to bailout them...
From SETI at UC Berkeley:
We've started searching our Kepler SETI observations and our analyses have generated some of our first candidate signals. Each of the signals below is shown in a pair of plots, one from an observation of Kepler Object of Interest (KOI) 817 and one from an observation of KOI-812. During an observation, we alternated between targets to enable us to rule out signals seen coming from two different places in the sky. If we see a signal coming from multiple positions on the sky, like the ones below, it is very likely to be interference. The signals below are undoubtedly examples of terrestrial radio frequency interference (RFI).
What do these plots represent?
These are plots of electromagnetic energy as a function of frequency and time. Brighter colors represent more radio energy at a particular time and frequency. For example, a radio station transmitting at 101.5 MHz would produce a large amount of energy near that frequency.
Why are these signals interesting?
These signals look similar to what we think might be produced from an extraterrestrial technology. They are narrow in frequency, much narrower than would be produced by any known astrophysical phenomena, and they drift in frequency with time, as we would expect because of the doppler effect imposed by the relative motion of the transmitter and the receiving radio telescope.
What's next?
These first results are tests of the algorithms we'll apply to all our observations of Kepler planets. During the coming weeks, we'll be posting more of our results as we process the nearly 50 TB of data we collected in early 2011.



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ANother Propagana set-up. We be the good guys, see? So how the fuck can they ever tell us not to transit any international waters.
Gulf of Tonkin Redux Plan 9
This just out from the President of Iran..."Can we have our guys back? Please?"
Yes! Finally time to launch an interstellar expedition! Count me in
When a SETI meets a yeti coming through the sky...
Good take off rhyme. Milestones
Nice post. Time to create a sister site on research regarding alien life. ZeroExraterrestrials.
Nice post. Time to create a sister site on research regarding alien life. ZeroExraterrestrials.
is there an ETF on that underlying?
3X Bull Armageddon ETF. Symbol: SOL
Let's send over a nuke!
But, they may not have any oil.
No oil?....
Let's put 200 life bankers in a capsule and fly them over!
Let's pray they survive the trip... With no air and all...
These signals look similar to WHAT WE MIGHT THINK be produced from an extraterrestrial technology.
Sounds a lot like the central banks. Definitely a Crox news headline story tonight.
Way to solve 1 simultaneous equation with a million unknows through imagination.
Targeting has begun.
Duck and cover.
(sarc)
Martians Bitchez!
HAARP bitchez
Those charts don't instill much confidence - upper left to....
the signal is a warning to stay away.
and whatever you do, do not stick your face in the small leathery pod looking like things.
it doesn't matter what kind of helmet you have on those damn face huggers can punch through anything...
They better hope they don't have any resources that the US would like.
This could be the most important discovery in the history of our species.
you dumb cunt, the most important discovery in the history of our species will be that YOU CANNOT PRINT YOUR WAY TO GROWTH
when these aliens show up im sure they will want to trade tech for the US Dollar, not silly gold or silver
All they really want is a bunch of 1s and 0s in their bank account.
From the article:
Aren't they specifically admitting here that the signals are NOT from aliens?
.
exactly! these signals are interferences from earth.
important update today on their website:
"Update: Friday, January 6, 2012 After posting the plots below on January 5, it became clear that we had not stated as definitively and absolutely as possible that these signals are interference. We have update the post to make this clear. Sorry for any confusion."
nothing to see here, unfortunatly
so this is the False Flag, everyone to FEMA camps to get vaccinations
no one could have imagined at the beginning of the 21st century, that across the gulf of space, intelligences vast and unsympathetic regarded our planet with envious eyes.
and slowly but surely drew their plans...against us.
duplicate
no one could have imagined at the beginning of the 21st century, that across the gulf of space, intelligences vast and unsympathetic regarded our planet with much hilarious amusement.
and slowly but surely pissed themselves as the human race fucked themselves and the planet up beyond redemption.
2012 edition.
So now all we have to do is build crafts capable of traveling there by distorting the space-time continumm, then declare war. SPX 1600 here we come!
I'll take one of those phased-plasma rifles in the 40 watt range, and a pack of Salem Lights, thank you.
That "take me to your leader" message has everyone baffled and confused.
Quote of the year.
This is getting fucking deep. I think i will watch reruns of Sanford and son on Antenna tv to take me back in time to when things made sense
"Take me to your Central Bank Chairman"
Dear aliens: please study human pyschopaths to learn exactly how not to run a world and then please transport the rest of us out of this hellhole!
No - take the damn psychopaths out of here.
I like my little space on this planet, and see only improvement sans the psychos.
long tripods, death rays and HG Wells
he wrote the alien apocalypse survival manual, even broadcast it on the radio once, might be a good time to check it out...
Prettyyyy
What do these plots represent?- More funding for SETI?
A fake alien invasion is overdue..
PREPARE URANUS
my spirit guide tells me they need gold and silver to line the atmosphere or their ailing planet..
Per NASA, KOI 812.03 looks to be an interesting celestial body. Much higher gravity than Earth, but 2x the radius. Equilibrium temperature in the low 80's farenheit, but lots of potential error in that number.
This has got to be bullish for those folks who got smart and bought land in Chile near the Nazca plains.
Everyone knows they dont use radio waves of any sort. It is all dont with mental telepathy. And the Beatles...All we need is love.
Check out "Billie Meiers" sometime. I'm slightly embarrased to admit this but I am fascinated by this stuff...
I prefer this version of the story: http://youtu.be/GsJlhV6Vk3s
Orson Welles wannabees
"The signals below are undoubtedly examples of terrestrial radio frequency interference (RFI)....These signals look similar to what we think might be produced from an extraterrestrial technology."
http://seti.berkeley.edu/kepler-seti-candidate-signals
Read slowly ... these are example of what a signal might look like. They're not extraterrtrial.
Good I am not alone in "Carefully Reading" the statement before jumping to wild conclusions.
Zerohedge sometimes sounds a lot like Slashdot.
RTFA
Ask if they are interested in buing UST or any European debt? We need urgently a buyer.
Thanks in advance
with our luck and the way things have been going, they'll prob want to land and set up their base camp as a flotilla @ the straights of hormuz
i hope tyler keeps a lookout for a shirley maclain statement. she invited them, ya know?
if we're really lucky, they will like to blog
and fight
and they'll be small
maybe tiny unicorns would be nice
just in case they're listening... or already blogging here...
Shazbot.
Funding ploy
I wonder if the PTL club is now broadcasting from KOI-812??
"The signals below are undoubtedly examples of terrestrial radio frequency interference"
I smell a vastly expanded tax base.
If it turns out that there are REAL aliens behind these signals, I wouldn't bet my last five quatloos on the humans!
awesome that I just went long ALYN. To the fucking moon bitchez....
Deleted post...Bill took care of it.
On the SETI website .. in the article that this ZH article is referring to .... the phrase "but all are undoubtedly examples of terrestrial radio frequency interference (RFI)" would seem to put kind of a damper on the whole "we have detected a signal" idea.
They are looking for jobs too. Sorry, UE is about to go up!
"...to serve man." They're not here to help us... it's a cookbook!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/To_Serve_Man_(The_Twilight_Zone)
Then tell them Barry and Holder are Gourmet Cuisine.
the great father said "Perhaps we need some outside universal threat... Is not an alien force not among us right now?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QK-XATA-5gs
and his cousin Roddy Piper has noticed as well:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFo8n3sZFT0
Hey Folks, Read the fine print.
"If we see a signal coming from multiple positions on the sky, like the ones below, it is very likely to be interference. The signals below are undoubtedly examples of terrestrial radio frequency interference (RFI)."
You got it all wrong.
If we see a single such signal, it is from an extra-terrestrial starship.
If we see them in multiple locations, that means they have us surrounded.
If we don't see any ... fuck! That means they're cloaked!
What black swan?
That's the cover so no one will panic....that line will be modified and then ultimately deleted from future reports....
You dudes be laughing out of the other side of yr faces when it comes out Keynes is a God on Planet Epsilon.
(They come to Earth looking to borrow some cash ...)
ZH has gone full retard.
del
Timmah isn't aware that holding the fraudulently executed Form 1040 behind the back cannot fool the bot.
I began to suspect that "Lost in Space" was not an entirely serious sci-fi series when they introduced the space Vikings ..... and the space hippies ..... and Mr. Sumdish from the Intergalactic Department Store ..... and when Dr. Smith was turned into a giant carrot ..... and when the traveling space circus paid the Robinsons a visit ..... and when .............
is that one of those HFT robots ?
Don't be Troubled. It's just radio waves from Tribbles.
Seems the Euro bailout scheme count is now up to Plan 9 from Outer Space.
Death Star radio
comes in great on clear nights...
Oh, Lord, please send your aliens to pick up Barry Soetoro and all his Red Queen friends..........
The Truch is out there Bit Cheze!!
MILLERThere ain't no difference between a flying saucer and a time machine. People get so hung up on specifics they miss out on seeing the whole thing. Take South America for example. [In] South America, thousands of people go missing every year. Nobody knows where they go, they just, like, disappear. But if you think about it for a minute, you realize something. There had to be a time when there was no people, right? Well where did all these people come from, huh? I'll tell you where. The future. And where did all these people disappear to? [Otto: The past?] That's right! And how did they get there? Flying saucers. Which are really..? Yeah,..... you got it, time machines. I think a lot about this kind of stuff. Repo Man (1984)
Space aliens don't do drugs!
BRAINWAVES!
The web-site itself says that these are interference patterns but that they LOOK LIKE what SEIT algorithms are looking for. This is noise. It is a publicity stunt. sheesh.
"They are narrow in frequency, much narrower than would be produced by any known astrophysical phenomena, and they drift in frequency with time..."
Obviously these are the remnants coming to us from a long dead planet...they appear to be caused by HFT's gone amok.
Turn the charts accompanying the article on their side and it is clear.
Dont worry about the economy.
We're all gonna be made into batteries by our new extraterrestrial overlords anyway, so you might as well run up the credit cards and do all the hookers and blow you can get your hands on.
Nice knowin' y'all.
Peace.
ha ha, SETI has been deemed dead, they are just justifying their "existence" to keep funds from "drying" up
I could just as well put up a website, with pictures of the first 6 (?7 ?N) Chairmen of the Federal Reserve, and the declaration "If grand-theft larceny is reported in Manhattan borough, these are examples of the faces you would see in the lineup at the police station." Please donate.
Attention!
Krugmaaaaan...
Krugmaaaan...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3Xj_SFqPw8
We are the Central Bankers. You will be impoverished. We will add your gold and silver stockpiles to our own. Lower your firewall and surrender your freedom. Resistance is futile.
Apparently people do not know how to interpret what's written - these are but test signs, that is, how to distinguish human-generated signals bounced from other astro bodies or captured directly from source from those generated from other planet sources.
So these are samples of
It definitely proves the Austrian School of Economics closer to what is Economic allocation of resources in modern society.
how close a breakthrough they get
every time cuts and layoffs are imminent.
when bankrupt universities start getting closed, a shocking flood of "discoveries" will suddenly hit the news. unbelivable what global deleveraging does to global science advances.