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Surrealistic Pillow talk. Wunderland stuff smoking and mirroring spreads and fall-down CDS counterparty support.
C didn't make any money...who is shocked by this?
At least they didn't lose eleventy billion like past quarters. There isn't going to be profit growth in the aggregate going forward...we're not in the Age of Growth any longer
I'm sure everything is just fine over at Citi...
Potemkin had to build actual fake frontages of his imaginary villages; C needs only to chat amongst itself.
Green shoots, red streams, same difference. 1.23 or 0.16, who cares? It is all worthless.
Of course it was a bloodbath.
That is why apologist Reuters is running, "Citigroup Beats Street, Sets Aside Less to Cover Bad Loans." The Powers That Be simply cannot be seen with even a single protein molecule of egg on their faces.
Are you that's not another protein molecule?
Trust me, I'm a Doctor!
LMAO! Awesome hilarity.
We're going to need a bigger vault
A little optomistic on the tubes learning curve.
Yup. And there's your preview of the squid which should be VERY interesting.
Time to max out your Citi visa card boys and girls!
and settly to pay back 1/5 of the amount for total redemption of the rest of the amount! :)
LOL- as a former Citi Investment Services exec, I can say with certainty that they are even fluffing the 16 cents.......
What do you mean by 'fluffing', what exactly goes on in Citit?
Take a pick: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fluffing
subtract out the $1.9 Billion CDS on itself, that is priceless...Time to throw a TARP over Citi
Tell your avatar to get to it. (Avatar is actual size of the real Timmay, by the way.)
Is it true that part of the bonus at Citi and the other TBTF are stock options...put options? Seems to be the better deal all things considered....
They're giving out CDS as bonuses, right after they buy it and generate all that revenue, of course.
Run into the ground by none other than the White House friend and Wall Street insider Robert the con man Rubin.
Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies. (and german media eating the bait.. CHEERIO)
Sets the stage nicely for the rest of financial 'earnings' reports...
i should be learning how to work these banks' magic on my P&L statement especially if i want a loan from one them.
I am now more excited for the weekdays than the weekends... The unraveling is intense
Citi earnings are, without fluff and accounting tricks, really losses, i.e. negative. Pandit the Bandit will not let his ego get in the way of a truckload of fluff though.
How in the world this "earnings report" passes muster with even the most positive perma-bull is beyond any rational comprehension
The bulls are happy that C picked up some European debt, there's only one direction that stuff can go
Cannot wait to see the Squid's CVA adjustment. We should start a betting pool here. I bet $1.22.
Hilarious. On Bloomberg Tom immediately called horseshit on C's beat while Ken flailed desperately to spin it gold. Interpretation?
Tom = at least smart enough to be out or short
Ken = still humping his 201K.
The banks must be seeing something that we aren't since they can release more of their loan loss reserves. Those OccupyWallStreet folks are going to feel a bit silly when the US storms back out of a recession in like 2 weeks and pulls out some China type growth. There will be so many jobs people won't know what to do.
Isn't it odd that banks could buy CDS on themselves? They already build into their employees the short termed thinking of you benefit from any upside and don't see any of the downside but now the entire firm will be operating on we'll pick up some extra revenue the closer we get to bankruptcy? They hold the country hostage being too big to fail and then they try everything they can to actually fail. Hopefully the Occupy Wall Street movement will help some saavy politicans realize that they could benefit from creating policies that help out the actual citizens of the US instead of the corporations that are trying to run the country into the ground.
New York Police Department said at least 88 protesters were arrested in New York on Saturday and overnight, including two dozen for trespassing at a Citibank branch and 45 in Times Square.
On Sunday, President Obama honoured Martin Luther King at a dedication to a new memorial on National Mall in Washington. Referring to protests that have spread from Wall Street to London, Rome and elsewhere, Mr Obama said: “Dr King would want us to challenge the excesses of Wall Street without demonising those who work there.”
another boondoggle on the Mall, and of course "mistakes were made" but nobody is actually culpable. Everyone was just "doing their job" and "following orders," just like Wall Street.
Why isn't the MLK memorial 556' tall? He is literally the most significant person who ever existed, as he invented dreaming. We need more streets, buildings, memorials for MLK. And at least 2 or 3 more holidays.
There's probably a 'banking holiday' in the near future...
Find an MLK boulevard near you and drive down it. It will be completely self-evident this smiley asshole is spot on.
I don't recommend driving down any MLK street.
Citi up pre-market, of course.
Incredible. Simple incredible. <golf clap>
Pre-markets are almost always up because the early morning coke deliveries.
Heh heh heh...Luv it...
Sorta brings to mind= Dinosaurs in the Tar Pits..!
The new golf clap is called "upward sprinkles".
But...don't the expectations take the CVA adjustments into account now?
Same bullshit like JPM. Extra money made by CVA/CDS
Tyler that's not a problem for Citi, that's their game plan. All they have to do is wrap themselves even tighter to Europe. They and the rest of the TBTF banks will all force a global collapse and whether we like a global federal government or not, it will be forced upon us by the banksters.
This is so sad...even Our Dear Banks cannot make money by making money?!
Can't they just buy some encouraging signage for the Frogs like they do for the American girls and boys at Bailout Ballpark?
Citi acct got hacked while in Asia last month...didn't even have to close acct...they did it for me...sometimes its better to be lucky than right...
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