Department Of Labor Tells 49 Unlucky Credit Suisse Bankers They Are About To Be Laid Off

Tyler Durden's picture

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redpill's picture

What an inglorious way to find out you're getting canned.

CPL's picture

HO HO HO!!

 

Fuck off you're fired!  

Eally Ucked's picture

That's not all yet Credit Agricole just announced few thousands lay-off plus closing operations in 21 countries. Just beginning! 

Temporalist's picture

I was just going to post that...

 

Credit Agricole to Eliminate Up to 2,300 Jobs

http://dealbook.nytimes.com/2011/12/14/credit-agricole-to-eliminate-2300-jobs/

 

markar's picture

No surprise there. they were rumored to be the bank going down that triggered the Fed's swap intervention last week.

TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

Rat out your criminal bosses at:

tips [ at ] zerohedge.com

It might be the difference between watching the hangings from the audience or watching them from the stage.

 

iDealMeat's picture

 long thumb drives.  Someone is going to "walk" with some info.

 

SheepleLOVEcheddarbaybiscuits's picture

no one ever cried over spilled bankers

nope-1004's picture

This type of thing happened to a friend of mine.  They were told they could go home early on a Friday, only to have senior management come in a seize all the computers before opening up Monday AM.  He was laid off on that Monday.

I bet the bomb scare was a hoax.  It was to buy time for all the computers to be quarantined and those people were then let go.

blu's picture

It could have been called in by a disgruntled employee, just having learned of layoffs.

Still supports your thesis however.

Miss Expectations's picture

Here's a site to watch...Daily Job Cuts (Layoffs, Bankruptcy, Closings)

http://www.dailyjobcuts.com/

fuu's picture

49 down, lots more to go.

My Taint's picture

Peace you fuckers

Richard Chesler's picture

Dear criminal associates,

There is nothing left to loot.

Now jump you fuckers!

 

topcallingtroll's picture

High quality 99 dollar sniperscopes at shopbarska.com.

Not that I would ever attempt to manipulate emotionally fragile people unlike you, RC.

And you saw it first (in a banner ad) at zerohedge.

Magnix's picture

That scope is piece of shit. It breaks. Had a friend who bought it and the lens inside the scope dislocated and broke.

Walter E Kurtz's picture

In their case, I'm pretty sure it would be a one time use item anyway.

topcallingtroll's picture

So what do you call 49 laid off credit swiss bankers?

CPL's picture

#Occupy?

 

Maybe if they are technical and know people #Anonymous

CPL's picture

Or if they know how to count they could be #FinAnon.

topcallingtroll's picture

Ding ding ding.

We have a winner!

youLilQuantFuker's picture

Meredith was just off a little on timing. Right around the corner Mr. Bloomberg.

slaughterer's picture

To the Credite Suisse 49: Welcome back to the 99%, Join OWS fuckers.   Karma for selling private account info to the US govenment and various unsuccessful looting operations.   No pity.  

non_anon's picture

and they will be the first ones to file for food stamps, welfare and unemployment beneifts to go with their golden parachutes

williambanzai7's picture

Credit Agricole is chopping 2500 investment bankers and consumer finance schlemiels.

q99x2's picture

McDonald's is hiring but I think they run background checks.

Shineola's picture

Please dont tell my folks I lost my bankìng job. I told them I was a piano player in whore house. Not a big stretch.........really.

walküre's picture

OFF TOPIC. Where is the President of Pakistan? Just across the wire that he's been "missing" for a week !!!!!

Crisismode's picture

Visiting his good pals in Beijing.

Jena's picture

Zardori has reportedly had a "mini-stroke", or trans-ischemic attack that can sometimes be a presursor to an actual stroke or it may be inconsequential.  Whether it's true or not?  http://www.washingtonpost.com/world/asia-pacific/pakistani-president-had-mini-stroke-but-will-return-to-office-associate-says/2011/12/13/gIQAx6SUrO_story.html

Shineola's picture

Christians In Action sent him a drone from heaven.

Dr. Engali's picture

I'm sure they will land a good job at a buy here pay here used car lot.

stock trout's picture

Reason stated for filing: Plant Layoff

 

Plant? So a bank is a plant, or maybe the IBM 360 COBOL/RPG program that produces this report hasn't been updated to allow for financial institution layoffs.

Or perhaps they failed a random drug test.

blu's picture

Carefully placing the bad news into a stats column far removed from financials.

The lies never stop.

Saro's picture

Plant Layoff

I think it means they're firing the moles they've placed in strategic positions within the government.

hungarianboy's picture

http://www.portfolio.hu/en/img/dotted.gif); background-attachment: initial; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial; color: #d64703; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 3px; padding-left: 0px; margin-top: 15px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 5px; margin-left: 0px; background-position: 0% 100%; background-repeat: repeat no-repeat;">New Central Bank Act unveiled in Hungary

The draft of Hungary's proposed Central Bank Bill has been posted on Parliament's website on Wednesday. While the rationale section almost exclusively focuses on how the new legislation is designed to ensure the independence of the National Bank of Hungary, the actual changes to the current law suggest otherwise. If the new bill is passed, not only could two additional seats be added to the rate-setting Monetary Council, but the government would also have a mandate to appoint another Vice Governor - both without consulting the NBH first. 

 

In other words, The goverment is taking controll over the Hungarian central bank

firstdivision's picture

They could get jobs working on rigs in Brazil...oh wait no they cannot. 

Brazil is doing a good job of maintaining elevated oil prices.

blu's picture

Makes for a larger bonus pool for the top-tier playerz. Of course they will have fewer workers going into next year and lower expectations, but nobody cares, because there will be no next year.

They are eating their own. And then there were none.

junkyardjack's picture

Nice use of a bomb scare.  The employees will come back in and their desk will be gone

Temporalist's picture

The "scare" is actually the sovereign debt bomb waiting to explode...but nothing to worry about/risk on/green shoots/eurozone fixed/recovery any year now.

Granangry's picture

They deserve all they get and MORE

kito's picture

farming..........thats where its at................

buchesky's picture

Tyler - You may be confused how this works.  The WARN notice is not just to NY State, but also to the employees.  The WARN act requires employers to give the state and the employees 90 days notice when the company is laying off a large number of employees in a single geographical area.  The employees are certainly not finding out via this NYS web site.  Individuals typically find out the same day the notice is filed with the state.

chubbar's picture

Note to any soon to be unemployed banking elite: Immediately copy and secure all material related to the ongoing crimes being committed by central banks, investment banks and gov't officials in order to guarantee a seat at the bargaining table after being laid off.

youngandhealthy's picture

I have no pitty whatsoever for any Bankster being fired. Any.

BluPoint's picture

Lost my job down at the plant honey.  Whatta we gonna do now?

youLilQuantFuker's picture

The obvious answer is that the honey plant must produce.

Unemployment has become discouraging. Despair is in the air and everyone is breathing it.

The slaves are feeling a sense of malaise.

When confronted with unemployment in the current climate they will chose to grab at the brass ring.

Breed, declare insolvency, target social benefits to offset loss of income. Wash, rinse, repeat.

It's the only solution to an upside down pyramid. Increase population.