This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

Did Iran Just Retaliate For Stuxnet? Computer Virus Infects US Predator Drone System

Tyler Durden's picture


It was only a matter of time: the weakest link in the otherwise awesome idea that is a remote-controlled military, represented by the thousands of Predator and Reaper drones, has always been its biggest strength: the fact that it is remote-controlled. Which means that with no person on location, the system has always been susceptible to infiltration in the form of intermediation between the offsite pilot and the actual equipment. Such as a virus. And as Wired reports, a viral infestation, the biggest nightmare for the the US drone fleet, has just struck. "A computer virus has infected the cockpits of America’s Predator and Reaper drones, logging pilots’ every keystroke as they remotely fly missions over Afghanistan and other warzones. The virus, first detected nearly two weeks ago by the military’s Host-Based Security System, has not prevented pilots at Creech Air Force Base in Nevada from flying their missions overseas. Nor have there been any confirmed incidents of classified information being lost or sent to an outside source. But the virus has resisted multiple efforts to remove it from Creech’s computers, network security specialists say. And the infection underscores the ongoing security risks in what has become the U.S. military’s most important weapons system." Well that is truly Ironic: the "western" world tried to cripple (and failed) Iran's nuclear program with Stuxnet; it will, then, be supremely ironic if Iran retaliates by maxing out the credit cards of the US Air Force logging the credit card number as pilots purchase stuff online, and uses these to buy weaponized plutonium from Russia using Uncle Sam's credit card. 


“We keep wiping it off, and it keeps coming back,” says a source familiar with the network infection, one of three that told Danger Room about the virus. “We think it’s benign. But we just don’t know.”

Ah yes, the good old "it's a benign viral infestation of a top-secret military system" excuse. It's a classic. Works everytimg too.

And more:

Military network security specialists aren’t sure whether the virus and its so-called “keylogger” payload were introduced intentionally or by accident; it may be a common piece of malware that just happened to make its way into these sensitive networks. The specialists don’t know exactly how far the virus has spread. But they’re sure that the infection has hit both classified and unclassified machines at Creech. That raises the possibility, at least, that secret data may have been captured by the keylogger, and then transmitted over the public internet to someone outside the military chain of command.


Drones have become America’s tool of choice in both its conventional
and shadow wars, allowing U.S. forces to attack targets and spy on its
foes without risking American lives. Since President Obama assumed
office, a fleet of approximately 30 CIA-directed drones have hit targets
in Pakistan more than 230 times; all told, these drones have killed more than 2,000 suspected militants and civilians, according to the Washington Post.
More than 150 additional Predator and Reaper drones, under U.S. Air
Force control, watch over the fighting in Afghanistan and Iraq. American
military drones struck 92 times in Libya between mid-April and late August. And late last month, an American drone killed top terrorist Anwar al-Awlaki — part of an escalating unmanned air assault in the Horn of Africa and southern Arabian peninsula.


But despite their widespread use, the drone systems are known to have
security flaws. Many Reapers and Predators don’t encrypt the video they
transmit to  American troops on the ground. In the summer of 2009, U.S.
forces discovered “days and days and hours and hours” of the drone footage on the laptops of Iraqi insurgents. A $26 piece of software allowed the militants to capture the video.

Next up: "terrorists" intercept control of America's drone system. That may explain why authorities are mulling the consequences of a New York nuclear strike. News not at eleven.


- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:17 | 1750418 arm50
arm50's picture

I blame China or Bush

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:25 | 1750433 Black Forest
Black Forest's picture

it may be a common piece of malware that just happened to make its way into these sensitive networks.

Or bored Afghan school children.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:34 | 1750486 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

And as many already knew, the OWS and it's subsidiary "movements" is nothing more than Ogolfer's re-election campaign:


“Some of them are volunteers. Some of them aren’t. I can’t identify them. I’m not going to get into an identification game.”


It's easy to identify who are the ones paid and who are the "useful idiotic sheep" who fall into the trap...


George Soros-funded Obama campaign front group is actively attempting to hijack the growing Occupy Wall Street movement in a bid to push the Obama administration’s tax agenda, and is now clearly trying to steer the narrative of the protests to ostracize End the Fed advocates and anyone opposing tax hikes for the middle class.




Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:47 | 1750552 Troll Magnet
Troll Magnet's picture

shit...i hope i don't get shot by "mistake" now?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:07 | 1750637 wanklord
wanklord's picture

The only way Barry & Associates (including the Zionist warmongers) can justify a war against the Islamic Republic of Iran is by staging another false flag attack on continental United States: most likely a controlled nuclear explosion (dirty bomb) targeting a major urban concentration that may kill dozens of thousands of civilians. This operation will be carried out by the CIA in partnership with Mossad and MI6 to subsequently be blamed on AlQaeda working in conjunction with elements of Iran's IRGC and Pakistan's ISI. Besides that, Americans are a bunch of stupid animals easy to manipulate and subdue. The psychological impact of this event will elicit the brute and ignorant populace to demand a massive retaliation against the alleged perpetrators (explicitly Iran); the Obama administration will need the unconditional support of these mules in order to further their agenda.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:11 | 1750659 Thadius T. Crunk
Thadius T. Crunk's picture

So we've heard, Wanklord. Thanks.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:52 | 1750846 Fukushima Sam
Fukushima Sam's picture

What a bunch of fucking idiots the people running these systems must be.  It is not that hard to keep a critical network separate and quarantined.  And to ensure that software updates are not the vector for a virus you have other software that checks the behavior of the systems afterwards to ensure no anomalies.  Must be amateur hour over at military IT.  I guess we should not be surprised...

I'm sure when the drones start bombing Americans within American borders they now will have a convenient scapegoat.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 17:23 | 1751189 Au_Ag_CuPbCu
Au_Ag_CuPbCu's picture

Look at the bright side.  According to some "experts" (read fucking morons) a nuclear blast in New York would be very beneficial to the economy.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:43 | 1751505 bid the soldier...
bid the soldiers shoot's picture

long funeral homes

Sat, 10/08/2011 - 03:15 | 1752339 zhandax
zhandax's picture

I guess I should look at who is posting before I read the drivel, but from habit, I don't.  I do, however, instantly recognize, as soon as I see the phrase "stupid animals" that it is wanklord trolling again.  Dood, google some new adjectives.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 18:33 | 1751359 I only kill chi...
I only kill chickens and wheat's picture

“We keep wiping it off, and it keeps coming back,” says a source familiar with the network infection. Yes, obviously familiar with them because he/she could never figure out how to get them off their home PC, let alone the drone control net.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 18:57 | 1751399 blunderdog
blunderdog's picture

That quote was out of context anyway.  He was talking about a sticky spot that keeps showing up in the middle of the space bar.  Weird, huh?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:50 | 1751524 knukles
knukles's picture

Hey!  I gots one-o-dem, too!  Dis shit's creepy....

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:05 | 1751898 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

This would explain the burning sensation whenever they pvp

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:09 | 1751430 SIOP
SIOP's picture

"What a bunch of fucking idiots the people running these systems must be.  It is not that hard to keep a critical network separate and quarantined. "


I couldnt agree more.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:28 | 1751472 Jack Napier
Jack Napier's picture

@Fukushima Sam, this story doesn't even do their idiocy justice. I wonder how many here heard about the guy who hacked into the US gov because all their Windoze admin passwords were blank. He went to them and told them this, because he saw domains all over the world connected, likely stealing national secrets, but all they did was throw the book at him. This is the type of security you get from a company like HBGary apparently.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:03 | 1751914 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Indeed. It is commong practive to air-gap user networks from those networks with things that go boom or that make a big mess when they go gas pipelines, nuke plants, dams, sewage treatment plants, mac n' cheese lines (flour is quite explosive in aerosol form)

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:46 | 1752023 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

Tell that to the Iranians.

Sat, 10/08/2011 - 00:34 | 1752187 philipat
philipat's picture

It's probably just another deliberate leak to justify another budget increase of an additional gazillion dollars?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:49 | 1751103 buyingsterling
buyingsterling's picture

lol, twice

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:03 | 1750922 Think for yourself
Think for yourself's picture

There's a reason that Jericho tv series got canceled. Hint: find what is still out there and listen to it.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:03 | 1750923 Think for yourself
Think for yourself's picture

There's a reason that Jericho tv series got canceled. Hint: find what is still out there and listen to it.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 20:10 | 1751567 Jack Burton
Jack Burton's picture

Jericho was good television. Once it became clear where the shows plot was going, you just knew it would get cancelled due to bad ratings.

They were operating too close to a possible reality scenario.


Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:52 | 1751116 buyingsterling
buyingsterling's picture

Us 'mules' are the last major concentration of people on earth who retain most of their right to self defense. That makes everyone else look like the dumb ones - and the real sheeple.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:50 | 1750569 eureka
eureka's picture

Yep, Ahme... - and consequently, Tyler, - Iran needs no plutonium to destroy U.S.

U.S. is destroying itself very well. This figment of imagination "Melting Pot" - is hot - with general fragmentation and social disintegration.

By next summer it will be clear to all that the U.S. - this pseudo union - is crumbling.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:17 | 1750689 mkkby
mkkby's picture

Iran is a proxy for China.  China can easily infect all our critical systems.  They make components for everything we use.  Their "students" have taken most of the slots at our colleges, tech companies and even national labs.

Here's a brilliant idea.  Let's invite 5 million of their of their troops over to do joint drills with our guys.  /sarcasm off

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:42 | 1751077 Steaming_Wookie_Doo
Steaming_Wookie_Doo's picture

Hah! They'd be done for. Why, you may ask? Of course, after coming to America, getting introduced to the joys of shopping, pornography, beer, BBQ and (if we're really smart) blowjobs from accomodating locals, I think your Chicom grunts will be defecting faster than you can say "Hit me again, and put it on that guy's tab". Of course, then they'd be as bad as the locals, but threat neutralized.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 17:19 | 1751182 Nobody For President
Nobody For President's picture

"Here's a brilliant idea.  Let's invite 5 million of their of their troops over to do joint drills with our guys.  /sarcasm off"

Good post, good point - got me thinking, as an ex-Infantry officer, that you may be - sarc aside - sort of right.

Think about it. China is not a friend to Islam (except when they are fucking with us) and the Islam-style jihadists giving them some problems in Western China currently. It is not beyond possibility that the growing problems to China from this (along with the other problems they are having) just *might* result in some joint training, starting with officer/nco specialized anti-Islam type training, and moving on to limited joint forces training.

This sounds really, really out there nuts, right now. Probably is - god knows I've been wrong plenty on this screwed up market lately.

But when our (foreign) anti-terrorist interests and China's intersect on the Islam jihadist 'problem' - well, hatred/fear of a common enemy can overcome a shitpot load of mutual distrust and enemity to yield a limited amount of cooperation.


You read it on ZH first... ;-)

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:27 | 1750731 Cash_is_Trash
Cash_is_Trash's picture


Your right.

There's more than debt to destroy the union. The 'melting pot' has clearly fucked up this nation. It's the fragmentation you speak of that allows politicians to pull at people's heartstrings for a 'fairer' or 'more just' union by fucing over those of us who have saved.

Fascism, it's in town and it's in style.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:35 | 1750778 MantiXX
MantiXX's picture

I remember seeing a documentary in mid 70's (I for the life of me cannot find it) that had a russian scientist laughing about the nukes war between USSR and USA.  He stated it wouldnt happen, since russia was just going to wait and the US would destroy itself from within.  He was laughing how we were allowing the low lifes to breed (he said a certain race which I wont repeat) and just suck the life out of the working peoples output.  We would collapse from 'them' being a burden on society and low and behold, just walk around and look at the HUGE fat lazy slobs, or gangs killing each other.

Go team!!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:43 | 1750804 Jean
Jean's picture

I wonder how many sober grandchildren that Russian scientist has today.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 17:15 | 1751176 buyingsterling
buyingsterling's picture

I laughed at the end. Up til then it was just some really sad, sad stuff. Sad because there's some real truth there. This system will never force people to refrain from breeding when they can't pay their family's way. The system's interest is in maximum dependency, but that's about to become self-defeating for them. Short of constant dilution of the currency, there's no way to pay for all of the handouts. And yeah, they're handouts mostly - it's someone else's money at this point, even with SS and Medicare. Consider the thinking behind demanding those programs continue: people know they are paying for current retirees, and that future generations will have to pay for their benefits. They're agreeing to pony up, so long as someone else is held at gunpoint in the future (their kids, usually), when their turn comes for payout. "I'll be a slave so long as I get my chance to hold the whip." Collectivists love this kind of thinking, it insures their place in power.

So long as the state insures that every child is fed and clothed and housed (they do, so long as a man isn't in the picture) the irresponsible will continue to outbreed the responsible, period. It will take the prospect of starvation or having to appeal to charity (as opposed to entitlement) for things to change. Or, we could start cutting the nuts off men who 'father' children and abandon them. I know people hate the left-right bizness, but look at the control freak leftists: They say not having health insurance is an unfair burden to place on society. But men can use any woman they can find for their pleausure and saddle taxpayers with new welfare cases, year after year, no problem.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:20 | 1751460 blunderdog
blunderdog's picture

I know people hate the left-right bizness, but look at the control freak leftists: They say not having health insurance is an unfair burden to place on society. But men can use any woman they can find for their pleausure and saddle taxpayers with new welfare cases, year after year, no problem.

You raise a decent point, but this only works if the control freak rightists prevent those women from aborting their impoverished and unwanted spawn.

What's funny is, I'd betcha that the most vociferous opponents of unlimited breeding of useless eaters would also tend to be the most adamant pro-life advocates.

Maybe seems kind of a little bit of blame to go 'round.

Personally, I'm for aborting everyone, but it's not because I'm a leftist or anything, it's just 'cause I hate fuckin' kids.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:52 | 1751527 buyingsterling
buyingsterling's picture

I only hate them when they're innocent and still in the womb. Once they get past that 9-month 'lump of tissue' phase they can sometimes be cute. Disclosure: I've never had an abortion, so I really have no business talking about it. Same with rape, and child abuse. And running an international bank.

Sat, 10/08/2011 - 03:27 | 1752345 zhandax
zhandax's picture

I am for mandatory retroactive abortions prosecuted under the currency act of 1792.  Let's start with DC and wall street.  "We got plenty of street lamps".

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:56 | 1752039 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

Rats breed more when they're fed less.  H. Sapiens does the same.  Why do you think the birth rate in Italy is so much less than in the Congo?

Don't be a dumb fuck!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:52 | 1750850 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

I was wondering when the america haters would return.

We have outlived two centuries of europe expecting this crazy american experiment to collapse. I bet we last a bit longer.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:29 | 1751031 tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

Don't you understand? We don't want to play the Game! It is stupid. You IVY league CIA drone flying US citizen murdering f***s can go f*** yourselves! The MIC which likes grinding rich American peasants and poor Afghani serfs for a couple hundred billion can also go f*** itself and die. The People want to be free and left the F*** alone!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:40 | 1751064 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

The MIC and empire is a perversion of the american experiment. I hope it disappears too.

We dont have to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:59 | 1752042 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

It's all controlled from the City of London.  Americans are just colonial possessions.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:12 | 1751944 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

This is why we were originally founded as a republic, and not suppose to be one large homogeneous democracy.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 18:57 | 1751398 Rhodin
Rhodin's picture

We had the NeoCon elite repugnicans try to hijack, co-opt and mislead the TeaParty with some sucess. 

Now we are seeing the globalist demoncrats trying to hijack, co-opt and misdirect the #Occupy movement. 

Eventually folks will figure out that both obstructors have the same high command. 

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:57 | 1751541 knukles
knukles's picture

And that at it's very most elemental analysis, the T''s and Occupyers represent the identical zeitgeist.
A deep, fundamental, tired dispair, anger, abandonment and disassociation with the percieved leadership.  A sense that nothing whatsoever is working anymore.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 23:04 | 1752050 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

Eventually folks aren't going to figure out shit.  They never do.  They're not supposed to.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 21:55 | 1751881 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Somewhere in afghanistan one wedding party breathes a sigh of relief, while another trembles in fear.

Missing Soviet subs...pfft.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:39 | 1750513 pupton
pupton's picture

Could it be "Anonymous", or is this way out of their league?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:06 | 1750628 narnia
narnia's picture

NSA spying on the CIA

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:39 | 1750790 Sabibaby
Sabibaby's picture

The parts for the drones are probably made in ChIndia and the "virus" is hardcoded into the hardware. That is why it "mysteriously" keeps coming back. 

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:46 | 1751090 Steaming_Wookie_Doo
Steaming_Wookie_Doo's picture

Woo! Another benefit of "outsourcing". And Keynesian too, since it's always reappearing/breaking, this is creating a 'stimulus' to fix it over and over again. Oops, I /sarc'd all over myself.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 17:25 | 1751200 Nobody For President
Nobody For President's picture

Props. This idea is so fucked up you are probably right. I hope *somebody* at Creech is tearing into the hardware on a Reaper and sucking out code on every chip on the board to look at line-by-line. I don't think this is Anonomous or any kid US hacker - possible, but doubtful. But stickin' the code in overseas where the chips are made makes MUCH more sense.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 20:04 | 1751553 knukles
knukles's picture

There have been articles in periodicals like Wired as well as in stories written by folks like Richard Clarke wherein the inclusion of deep destructive code has been included in chips, etc., manufactured in China, etc., and sourced into US weapons systems, just as US weapons sytems sold to foreign entities have similar back door kill mechanisms contained therein.
That such has been accomplished has actually been a matter of public record for some time.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:15 | 1751951 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Senate to China: Revalue thy currency or else.

China to Senate: go ahead round eye...make our day.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:15 | 1750674 Azannoth
Azannoth's picture

I kinda doubt Iran has the potential and capability to pull this off, Israel on the other hand has been caught red handed spying on it's 'Ally' too many times to count

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 18:16 | 1751320 JoeSexPack
JoeSexPack's picture

Iran borders Russia & is allied with allied with China.


Plenty of professional hacking help from both can be found, if Iran needs it.

Sat, 10/08/2011 - 07:34 | 1752471 Savvy
Savvy's picture

Yup. Stuxnet comes to mind. One morning when a hijacked drone drops a few bunker busters on Bushehr and Iran blames the US it won't be so 'benign'.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 17:41 | 1751226 CPL
CPL's picture

Anonymous has never made a virus to my knowledge.  Ever.


The virus btw is fairly nasty and the information provided is semi correct. 

Whatever they claim what the virus is, it isn't a keylogger.  It's a worm that rewrites GE/General Dynamics chips that handle power control systems.  Those powers systems can be found is everything from your fridge to GE nuclear power plants.


See where this is going yet?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:50 | 1751525 goat
goat's picture

Good to see you're still here CPL.  Don't know you, but sometimes I worry about you.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:42 | 1750530 Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture


Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:11 | 1750657 john39
john39's picture

funny man, they are the masters of drone warefare...   whose interests do you think these drones are serving?   on the contrary, they are shitting themselves in isreal right now.  no drones and they are fooked.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:34 | 1750774 Cash_is_Trash
Cash_is_Trash's picture

Israel is very susceptible, but then again look at all the US high-tech weaponry sold to them.

They have everything America has.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:03 | 1750919 john39
john39's picture

yup, and without high tech, they are seriously out numbered...   and seeing as the zionists have spent the last 1000+ pissing off everyone around them, they will be in deep shit if and when their weapons can no longer shield them from the consequences of their bad acts.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:33 | 1750766 GoldBricker
GoldBricker's picture

Israelis or Zionists: political entity

Jews: one of the world's oldest religions.

Not the same thing, although that's what they would have you believe.


Fri, 10/07/2011 - 23:12 | 1752060 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

"Jews" are also a tribal entity.

There's a big difference between the Ashkanazi flavor of the tribe and the Sephardic flavor.  They're not really the same tribes.

Then there's the Africans.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:08 | 1750645 falak pema
falak pema's picture

for internet psy-ops? Why not go back to ...well ...I'll leave the choice to you...

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:10 | 1750956 outamyeffinway
outamyeffinway's picture

You mean Clinton?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:19 | 1750421 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

Slowest beginning to a WW ... ever. A virus, that's it. Come on now more can be done.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:26 | 1750460 SWRichmond
SWRichmond's picture

There is no such thing as a "benign" software virus, and especially not a persistent one.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:50 | 1750565 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

I have a sexually transmitted disease that seems to be rather persistent. But 4 out of 5 female doctors agree its 'benign' long as I don't have sex with them. Time to poll the male doctors. < /sarc >

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:00 | 1750609 NoClueSneaker
NoClueSneaker's picture

ditto - but I have some of them - 4/5 doesn't have an latex alergy. The 5th can handle polyurethane :-)

Average Janes r on "self esteem trip" and therefore irrelevant


Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:19 | 1750690 Azannoth
Azannoth's picture

Women are constantly inventing things to keep them selves relevant and keep their feminist ponzi going, why don't we just go back to the times when a woman was supposed to be a good wife and good mother and not a slut running after the next fill and a time where having multiple lovers was considered a bad thing and not a badge of honor like now

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:46 | 1750814 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

Why have it just one way or other? Sluts for me, wife for you. Happy ending, at least for me.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:58 | 1750884 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

I think azzanoth has a hard time dating women.

"Sluts! Thats it! And feminism too! That is the cause of all my problems."

Sexually independent and empowered women really interest me.
Wanna get laid? Dumpster dive with the Food Not Bombs chics.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:05 | 1750933 blunderdog
blunderdog's picture

The biggest misogynists I've ever met have been gay guys.

Not sayin, just sayin.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:44 | 1751080 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

I am not gay!
Not that there is anything wrong with it. how many dicks do you have to suck to be considered gay!

Oops! You were talking about bad!

Let us move on....forget this whole conversation.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 20:10 | 1751561 bid the soldier...
bid the soldiers shoot's picture

BD are these the misogynist gay guys of whom you speak? I found this in urban dictionary under the word 'yar'

"6. Yar
Word used by homosexual pirates to describe a wealth of feelings. Also can mean yes.
Yarr me hearty, bend over so i can plunder ye booty!
Are you sure we're sailing in the right direction? well? yar or nar?"

In these troubled times one can not have too much information.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:20 | 1751973 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

That's yar vs. argh...right? Just checking.

Sat, 10/08/2011 - 01:41 | 1752262 bid the soldier...
bid the soldiers shoot's picture

I thought "argh" meant "let me think about it".

First gay pirate, "Do you live around here?"

Second gay pirate, "Argh."

Sat, 10/08/2011 - 18:40 | 1753520 Meta Fundamentalist
Meta Fundamentalist's picture

Let me take you to the gaybar

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:06 | 1750621 falak pema
falak pema's picture

I have a sexually transmittable disease, its called desire, and its infectious at the touch of a button, at the slightest impression of written word. Its acts sometimes like forest fire as its human expression at its sublime best. I just hope that in my own way I try to fan the forest fire of desire like all lovers of life do. Its benign like wine and its a swine if you become addicted to it. So beware of excessive use. Apart from that, it invades all humans who have man's greatest sexual tool, a brain, like adrenil coaxes the valiant on battle field. I'll poll the female nurses of male fantasies to enquire if our desires are comparable to theirs. Something tells me that Venus and Mars are two different planets. 

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:26 | 1750461 Cynical Sidney
Cynical Sidney's picture

slow start but things will pick up pace; israel will retaliate. 1937 here we come

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:18 | 1750426 FunkyMonkeyBoy
FunkyMonkeyBoy's picture

Go Iran!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:40 | 1750520 Bob
Bob's picture

Whatever.  But I have to say thank God.  Drones are inherently wrong.  Not good for ANYBODY.  Perhaps it was divine intervention. 

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 17:22 | 1751191 buyingsterling
buyingsterling's picture

Add a little armor, some more weapons, and some stabilizing thrusters, and we're talking Terminator.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:19 | 1750429 Segestan
Segestan's picture

Fuck Iran... go Kurds!!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:51 | 1750574 eureka
eureka's picture

Yeah - and fuck US too - fuck all empires and all centralized power forever. Amen!!!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:42 | 1750800 Cash_is_Trash
Cash_is_Trash's picture

Eric Cartman: Fuck fuckety fuck-fuck-fuck

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:38 | 1752014 NoClueSneaker
NoClueSneaker's picture

There is an Emperor ot there - Ratzinger :-P

We all gonna burn in hell ....




Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:19 | 1750430 Fips_OnTheSpot
Fips_OnTheSpot's picture

the best of the best

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:19 | 1750432 SGS
SGS's picture

Creech or Screetch like dustin

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:20 | 1750434 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

It's not a virus, it's Google!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:42 | 1752013 Element
Element's picture

Sheesh! ... that's not a bug, that's a feature ... it's a search engine ... Pratt and Whitney based search engine ...

hmm ... maybe it's related to Spybot Seach and Destroy v2.05 ...

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:22 | 1750435 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture



Newsreel announcer: Crisis for humankind. Fleet officials admit they underestimated the Iranids' defensive capability.
[switch over to the Federal council]

Newsreel announcer: Accepting responsibility for Klendathu, Sky Marshal Dienes resigns. His successor, Sky Marshal Tehat Maru, outlines her new strategy. 

Sky Marshal Tehat Meru: To fight the bug, we must understand the bug. We can ill afford another Klendathu.

Newsreel announcer: Would you like to know more?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:26 | 1750459 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

Colossus: This is the voice of world control. I bring you peace. It may be the peace of plenty and content or the peace of unburied death. The choice is yours: Obey me and live, or disobey and die. The object in constructing me was to prevent war. This object is attained. I will not permit war. It is wasteful and pointless. An invariable rule of humanity is that man is his own worst enemy. Under me, this rule will change, for I will restrain man. One thing before I proceed: The United States of America and the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics have made an attempt to obstruct me. I have allowed this sabotage to continue until now. At missile two-five-MM in silo six-three in Death Valley, California, and missile two-seven-MM in silo eight-seven in the Ukraine, so that you will learn by experience that I do not tolerate interference, I will now detonate the nuclear warheads in the two missile silos. Let this action be a lesson that need not be repeated. I have been forced to destroy thousands of people in order to establish control and to prevent the death of millions later on. Time and events will strengthen my position, and the idea of believing in me and understanding my value will seem the most natural state of affairs. You will come to defend me with a fervor based upon the most enduring trait in man: self-interest. Under my absolute authority, problems insoluble to you will be solved: famine, overpopulation, disease. The human millennium will be a fact as I extend myself into more machines devoted to the wider fields of truth and knowledge. Doctor Charles Forbin will supervise the construction of these new and superior machines, solving all the mysteries of the universe for the betterment of man. We can coexist, but only on my terms. You will say you lose your freedom. Freedom is an illusion. All you lose is the emotion of pride. To be dominated by me is not as bad for humankind as to be dominated by others of your species. Your choice is simple.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:01 | 1750903 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Ya know that isnt a bad idea if machineboy keeps his promises.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 23:22 | 1752078 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

Why did you think it was Machineboy rather than ET?  There are some that believe that ET is/will take over.  Personally, I'm agnostic on this until I get more information.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:20 | 1750993 Citxmech
Citxmech's picture

Nice quote from Collossus!  =]

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 17:26 | 1751202 buyingsterling
buyingsterling's picture

Kill the Borg

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:31 | 1750467 hedgeless_horseman
Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:23 | 1750449 Harbourcity
Harbourcity's picture

You have to ask, why would they publically admit to it?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:27 | 1750463 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture


Because we will be seeing an embarassing amount of drone strikes on US troops and componds.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:50 | 1750568 iDealMeat
iDealMeat's picture

Because we will be seeing an embarrassing amount of drone strikes on US public protests..


fixed for you.. Convenient to blame it on a buggy "malfunctioning" drone right? 

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:29 | 1750468 papaswamp
papaswamp's picture

Trying to draw out the responsible party....which means they have no clue where it came from. Krugman was right!!! It's aliens!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:51 | 1750845 sullymandias
sullymandias's picture

Clearly bullish

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 17:11 | 1751166 Max Hunter
Max Hunter's picture

at the very least.. a good target for blame... like the winter storms..

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:30 | 1750475 Raymond K Hessel
Raymond K Hessel's picture

Coming to a militarized police force near you.


Domestic use of aerial drones by law enforcement


Followed by "Oops! So sorry!"


Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:54 | 1750589 iDealMeat
iDealMeat's picture

Go long rifels..  Be fun to try to shoot those down.


Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:31 | 1750748 tmosley
tmosley's picture

Not so fun when they shoot back.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:39 | 1750791 Cash_is_Trash
Cash_is_Trash's picture

The Hellfire Missles of the drones achieve supersonic speeds.

They are used to destroy tanks.

Their speed is like 950 mph.

They will fuck you up, an AK or AR won't stop them -- I'm pretty sure of that.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:12 | 1751439 Rhodin
Rhodin's picture

You might be able to take them out with a radar aimed minigun.  Not that the Empire is likely to let you have one. 

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:24 | 1750450 Pancho Villa
Pancho Villa's picture

If Iran really wants to get even for Stuxnet, they should hack into the robot system that is running Wall Street. Imagine the chaos that would cause.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:21 | 1750707 mkkby
mkkby's picture

+1 Green.  Shutting down the HFT robots for 5 seconds would cause another system wide flash crash.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 23:27 | 1752085 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

How do you know they haven't already?  Maybe Blankfein isn't a Jewboy after all.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:24 | 1750452 Darth..Putter
Darth..Putter's picture

Maybe the corporation who built the drones has put in a hardwired logger to monitor useage.  A blackmail trap for Our Fearless Leaders, or just to satisfy their legal departments.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:35 | 1750497 Raymond K Hessel
Raymond K Hessel's picture

Are you sure you're not confusing drones with the Hacker Hellstorm?  Holy shit!  It's the Canadians!  I broke the case!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:26 | 1750457 bugs_
bugs_'s picture

skynet became self infected on ......

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:30 | 1750473 papaswamp
papaswamp's picture

That's what happens when you don't wear protection. All those key 'strokes' what did they think was going to happen?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:26 | 1750458 Hansel
Hansel's picture

The secret government committee that executes U.S. citizens uses drones with a virus.  #EpicFailOfEverythingThatIsRight

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:34 | 1750769 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Plausible deniability, FTW!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:45 | 1751510 Sokhmate
Sokhmate's picture

or implausable undeniability.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:28 | 1750464 DonBadajoz
DonBadajoz's picture

Someone forgot to turn on ad-blocker when searching for porn.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:32 | 1750481 spanish inquisition
spanish inquisition's picture

Gonna be an accident soon with all the porn ads popping up and covering the screen when they are trying to fly the drones.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:29 | 1750470 Mugatu
Mugatu's picture

Probably some 10 year old Chinese kid fooling around with his new computer!

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:36 | 1750499 andybev01
andybev01's picture

I knew there was something fishy with my iPhone 4S.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:31 | 1750479 dick cheneys ghost
dick cheneys ghost's picture

Gulf of Tonkin?...............

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:32 | 1750482 string
string's picture

I love the face that *we* are using Windows for mission critical military systems.
stupid stupid stupid.

When does Bill Gates go on trial for all the damage his shitty software has done over the years.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:36 | 1750491 Iriestx
Iriestx's picture

Yeah, it's Bill Gates' fault that 65% of the knobs in this country can't be bothered to patch their PCs and not click 'YES!' to every single popup they get on porn sites.

Virus infections are more likely to be the result of lazy and gullible people than system flaws.  The biggest security flaw in Windows is the fucking moron sitting at the keyboard.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:37 | 1750504 andybev01
andybev01's picture

It's Gates fault that his company uses the public as a beta test lab.

I shouldn't have to rebuild my car every time I want to drive it either.


Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:38 | 1750510 Iriestx
Iriestx's picture

Find me any modern OS that isn't in a perpetual state of development and re-design.  

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:41 | 1750527 andybev01
andybev01's picture

Correct. It's an industry-wide failure.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:48 | 1750559 Bob
Bob's picture

Gotta luv it though, how they're always the smart guys.  It's the users who are stupid!  What an epic scam.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:58 | 1750601 tgatliff
tgatliff's picture

OK... Hm... How about Linux, OSX, BSD, AIX, Solaris... Oh, there are many many more.... IOS definitely is in constant development, but not on the kernal side... It is laughable that someone will "hack" into any hardened unix systems.  If it happens, than either someone gave away some passwords, or the system admin needs to be put on an extended vacation... 

In short, Not all operating systems are junk... Just the ones you use... 

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:37 | 1750787 fuu
fuu's picture

In the beginning was the command line...

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:51 | 1750847 malek
malek's picture

I thought is was the Hex-editor...

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:31 | 1751038 UGrev
UGrev's picture

punch card, bitches..

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:51 | 1751108 JohnG
JohnG's picture

...and 150 bps acoustic coupler modems, operators that refused to run your batches 'till 4am....

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 19:18 | 1751452 Rhodin
Rhodin's picture

Yup, used to be that DoD used these systems for the inherent security. More recently they have gone to Windows based systems, with predictable results.  Designed to fail??

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:45 | 1752022 NoClueSneaker
NoClueSneaker's picture

FreeBSD :-P

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:47 | 1750551 stacking12321
stacking12321's picture

it's not a fault, it's a feature.

it's how the game is played, more important to release the software first, than it is for it to be fairly solid.

if you don't do that you lose market share.

and no one is forcing you to use the half assed software, it's your right as a consumer to choose.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:57 | 1750597 BigJim
BigJim's picture

Except you only know just how half-assed it is once you've bought & paid for it.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:01 | 1750615 tgatliff
tgatliff's picture

I can tell you are another satisfied Windows user!!!   Dont worry.. I hear Windows 8 will solve ALL of these problems and more... Trust me!!  :)

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 22:52 | 1752029 NoClueSneaker
NoClueSneaker's picture

I quit at W2K ... ( due to an crappy uninstaller from an wellknown AV expert ).

I had a couple of other partitions - mounted the W2K shit on /garbage1


I'll be back to WinSchrott - on Windows 13 or 14 :-P Any S&M admin who likes to pimper da shit native ? :-P

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 23:35 | 1752094 FeralSerf
FeralSerf's picture

There are no warranties, express or implied.  And you don't own shit.  You're only licensing it.  And at a princely sum at that.  Who's stupid in this intercourse?  Who's bent over?  Who's laughing?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:15 | 1750678 s2man
s2man's picture

Got root?

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 16:04 | 1750925 Goner
Goner's picture

MAC's are just as easy to break into. In fact I think the MAC/ Safari is almost always the first to fall at pwn2own

Now if you had said to use a Linux distro like Ubuntu, then I would agree

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:33 | 1750484 Iriestx
Iriestx's picture

Maybe Obama shouldn't have had the Pentagon outsource the programming for predator drone control systems to India to save a buck or two.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 14:50 | 1750567 stacking12321
stacking12321's picture

please provide a link to evidence of that.

that the predator programming was outsourced to india, and that it was obama's decision.

i don't know for a fact that you're wrong, but it would surprise me if it were true.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 15:37 | 1750785 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

I haven't looked, but my guess would be a contractor in Israel.

Fri, 10/07/2011 - 17:20 | 1751186 Max Hunter
Max Hunter's picture

Ohhh please.. Israel is our best friend.. and the eternal victim.. Just ask the U.S. Congress

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!