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Diebold Leaks Election Results Early... Again

Tyler Durden's picture


Yes, it has happened before, but since truth is timeless, we were not surprised to find that it has been "leaked" again, in this timeless clip from TheOnion which explains everything one needs to know about the upcoming "elections"

h/t Mike Krieger


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Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:32 | 2111100 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Step into the booth, draw the curtains closed, and cast your hologram, bitchez.

We'll get who they like.



***Breaking News Scroll - We interrupt your batin' to report that a possibly armed & dangerous Not Sure has escaped from prison. President Camacho has issued a declarum maximus, sponsored by Brawndo (its got electorolytes!), to say something if you see something. Costco loves you. Eat your Green Giant Peas.***

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:32 | 2111122 dexter_morgan
dexter_morgan's picture

Right, kick ass. Well, don't want to sound like a dick or nothin', but, ah... it says on your chart that you're fucked up. Ah, you talk like a fag, and your shit's all retarded. What I'd do, is just like... like... you know, like, you know what I mean, like...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:10 | 2111200 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

Carroll Commission Spokesman: Ladies and gentlemen, you have been invited here today for the official announcement of the inquiry into the death of Senator Charles Carroll. This is an announcement, not a press conference. Therefore, there will be no questions. A complete transcript of the investigation is being prepared for publication on March 1st. At that time, the committee will hold a full-scale press conference. After nearly four months of investigation, followed by nine weeks of hearings, it is the conclusion of this committee that Senator Carroll was assassinated by Thomas Richard Linden. It is our further conclusion that he acted entirely alone, motivated by a sense of patriotism and a psychotic desire for public recognition. The committee wishes to emphasize that there is no evidence of any wider conspiracy; no evidence whatsoever. It's our hope that this will put an end to the kind of irresponsible and exploitive speculation conducted by the press in recent months, as I've said in the complete text of the hearings, which provides the bases for the committee's findings which will be published on March 1st. When you've had a chance to examine the evidence, you'll have every opportunity to ask those questions which remain unanswered, if they are any. That is all. Thank you.


Hammond Commission Spokesman: Ladies and gentlemen, you've been invited here today for the official announcement of the inquiry into the death of George Hammond. A complete transcript of the investigation is in preparation. This committee has spent nearly six months of investigation, followed by eleven weeks of hearings. After careful deliberation, it is concluded that George Hammond was assassinated by Joseph Frady. An overwhelming body of evidence has revealed that Frady was obsessed with the Carroll assassination, and in his confused and distorted state of mind seems to have imagined that Hammond was responsible for the senator's death. He was equally convinced that Hammond was somehow plotting to kill him. And it is for those reasons that Frady assassinated him. Although I'm certain that this will do nothing to discourage the conspiracy peddlers: there is no evidence of a conspiracy in the assassination of George Hammond. Those are our findings. The evidence will be available as soon as possible. Thank you. This is an announcement, gentlemen. There will be no questions.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:51 | 2111255 asdasmos
asdasmos's picture
Fed Members Laughed As Housing Bubble Grew


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:27 | 2111331 Henry Chinaski
Henry Chinaski's picture

Just liked Snoop Dogg, but know Romey will win.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:06 | 2111419 trav7777
trav7777's picture

GWB 3.0...the band played on

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:13 | 2111567 Milestones
Milestones's picture

NO! You took out Casey and the bucket of shit part---Damn ferniers.           Milestones

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 02:38 | 2112009 Dave Thomas
Dave Thomas's picture

I heard that this guy named Mario Monti was voted in democratically after Silvio Berlosconi stepped down, is that the same thing? I mean he wants to help Italy right?


Tue, 01/31/2012 - 04:13 | 2112060 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

Monti was not elected, he was appointed by the President of the Italian Republic and de facto confirmed by the parliament. Radically different political system.

feel a bit grumpy to have to make a serious comment after this hilarious Onion piece...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:34 | 2111126 hannah
hannah's picture

truth...that reminds me i need to have my taxes done with a happy ending

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:55 | 2111172 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

"Vote early and often."

Message sponsored by: Happy Valley Nails, Massage & Tax Preparation

Because it's your money, and you need it now.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:10 | 2111196 whstlblwr
whstlblwr's picture

Serve on Vote Watch

"There is only one way to immediately find out whether Scytl/SOE/[Diebold] reported the right results*, and that is for members of the public to capture evidence of reported precinct results when polls close. Think of it as a giant neighborhood watch.

Precinct results should be posted at each polling site. In addition, during poll closing the public has a right to be in the polling place watching and videotaping what goes on.

Here is a four-minute video showing exactly what to do:

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:53 | 2111259 macholatte
macholatte's picture


here's one way to buy the election


It is enough that the people know there was an election. The people who cast the votes decide nothing. The people who count the votes decide everything.
Joseph Stalin


Tue, 01/31/2012 - 01:23 | 2111936 Pike Bishop
Pike Bishop's picture

Funny you should mention that.

Romney's SuperPac is already drafting an outline for legislation in his platform regarding the fiscal policy plank.

For taxes and The Deficit, you will be able to pre-pay your income taxes for 2012-15. It's on the Honor System. Whatever you pay is good, and you're clear till the next Presidential election year..

The catch is that it's to be paid in gold, and the minum is 10 oz./yr. Drop off points will be banks held by Primary Dealers.

For Energy policy, they plan to work with Congress on a bill where Negroes and/or Food Stamp recipients will legally be declared firewood.

You heard it first here.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:07 | 2111195 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

I don't vote. Two reasons. First of all it's meaningless; this country was bought and sold a long time ago. The shit they shovel around every 4 years *pfff* doesn't mean a fucking thing. Secondly, I believe if you vote, you have no right to complain. People like to twist that around – they say, 'If you don't vote, you have no right to complain', but where's the logic in that? If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain. I, on the other hand, who did not vote, who in fact did not even leave the house on election day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done and have every right to complain about the mess you created that I had nothing to do with.”

“The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election”"Now, there's one thing you might have noticed I don't complain about: politicians. Everybody complains about politicians. Everybody says they suck. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? They don't fall out of the sky. They don't pass through a membrane from another reality. They come from American parents and American families, American homes, American schools, American churches, American businesses and American universities, and they are elected by American citizens. This is the best we can do folks. This is what we have to offer. It's what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're going to get selfish, ignorant leaders. Term limits ain't going to do any good; you're just going to end up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans. So, maybe, maybe, maybe, it's not the politicians who suck. Maybe something else sucks around here... like, the public. Yeah, the public sucks. There's a nice campaign slogan for somebody: 'The Public Sucks. Fuck Hope.'"

"I have solved this political dilemma in a very direct way: I don't vote. On Election Day, I stay home. I firmly believe that if you vote, you have no right to complain. Now, some people like to twist that around. They say, 'If you don't vote, you have no right to complain,' but where's the logic in that? If you vote, and you elect dishonest, incompetent politicians, and they get into office and screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. You voted them in. You caused the problem. You have no right to complain. I, on the other hand, who did not vote -- who did not even leave the house on Election Day -- am in no way responsible for that these politicians have done and have every right to complain about the mess that you created."

George Carlin

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:23 | 2111215 whstlblwr
whstlblwr's picture

Carlin was funny, but if he said this it's bullshit. First, Hitler was never elected, he only had 37 percent of vote. Hindenburg won majority vote.

It's not easy to take power from the status quo, you can lay around spitting anger at your computer or you can do something.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:47 | 2111248 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Wow, that's a pretty serious effort at missing a point.

As for doing something, how about STOP supporting the evil called voting?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:43 | 2111369 Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture

The Onion has more credibility than Fox News - now that is pathetic.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 00:49 | 2111894 divide_by_zero
divide_by_zero's picture

Perhaps you get you news from the truly pathetic Soros media network; MSNBC, HuffPoo, any of George's direct sites and associated blogs(thinkprogress, media matters,..), CBS, NBC, ABC, NPR/PBS, CNN, NYT, WaPo etc. He's even gotten into Columbia School of Journalism.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 08:09 | 2112187 memyselfiu
memyselfiu's picture

I smell something....did I just step in a pile of Glen Beck?

Funny, I didn't notice a chalkboard......

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 23:40 | 2111770 Desert Irish
Desert Irish's picture

I guess it was Churchill that stated something about democracy being the lesser of all evils.

I'm hoping there was a sarc missed on the above post. I originally came from a country that has compulsory voting which is an oxymoron hence I refused to vote because it went against the spirit of democracy. Then I grew up and realized if I could'nt be bothered to spend 30 minutes once every 4 years to decide whom would govern me then I deserved what I got. I think that's called maturity.

When American Idol recives more votes tha the US president it's game over unless we start eductating our youth what excactly a vote entails...

Sorry mate you get a downtick.



Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:26 | 2111593 el Gallinazo
el Gallinazo's picture

But President Hindenburg appointed him Chancellor, just as W and O'bumma appointed the Bernank Chairman.  All part of "democracy."

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:45 | 2111515 Road Hazard
Road Hazard's picture

Let me do some fixing up..... "They come from WEALTHY American parents and WEALTHY American families, WEALTHY American homes, WEALTHY American schools, WEALTHY American churches, WEALTHY American businesses and WEALTHY American universities, and they are elected by machines and out right voter fraud. "

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 13:28 | 2112910 Christophe2
Christophe2's picture

Well said.


I think the biggest issue with our system is that all of the politicians come from the 'Machine', and hence they are selected from the very start to be sellouts.  Even places like Zerohedge ONLY discuss candidates from the main parties - HOW ABOUT COVERING INDEPENDENT CANDIDATES?

=> Why is Ron Paul only compared against the pukes in the 2 main parties?  It's easy to look good when you limit the field as they do...


To wit: there are (surely) candidates out there who are not only against the Fed, but who also agree that 9/11 was an inside job and that Israel is NOT A FRIEND.  Ron Paul is a Washington political insider so well connected that he played a major role in getting Reagan nominated, and the guy is also deeply involved in free masonry: RP's father was a mason, and his wife and daughters are members of satellite orgs (Rainbow Girls, etc.).


I'm sure I'll get blasted by the RP machine for posting this, but I hope you'll notice they never have answers to these key questions (eg: watch them rationalize why their man is lying about 9/11).

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 15:17 | 2113637 fuu
fuu's picture

How about writing an article about them and submitting it? Quit waiting for other people to do your work for you.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 15:20 | 2113645 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Go fuu!

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 01:40 | 2111960 falun bong
falun bong's picture

Anyone who doesn't vote gets no further right to bitch. So go vote, and teach your friends whom to vote for. Yes we do have the power, if enough of us stick together and get going. My generation stopped a war and threw out a president who was a crook. We can do it again. Apathy is just what TPTB want from you...don't give it to them!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:40 | 2111361 Parabolic
Parabolic's picture

This is a MUST watch documentary. MAJOR props to Bev Harris and her crew for really sticking their lives and necks out on the line to find the truth behind these machines. This was featured on HBO--It's called Hacking Democracy. After watching it, I don't even know what to say or where to begin...but really confirms my initial gut reaction about the South Carolina primaries...!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:53 | 2111530 kridkrid
kridkrid's picture

Yeah... they did a great job with that film.  Amazing (not really) how little publicity it got, though it did make it onto HBO, which was surprising to me.

Our elections have been "fixed" for a very long time.  They were fixed without fudging the vote.  They were fixed in that people assumed that one candidate would provide some alternative to another, but clearly that's not the case.  But voter fraud is important now that politics have become an important diversion to our grim reality.  While American politics have been a form of loosely scripted reality TV for a couple of generations; like everything else, now that the entire system is beginning to buckle, it's a full on circus.  Bread and circus if you include food stamps.

2012 needs to top 2008 to keep people interested.  Obama vs. Hilary was tremendous theater... a black man with a Muslim sounding name vs. a former first lady... wow.  The R's have provided train wreck theater... but I think there's more to come.  There has to be.  The D's will have Chicago under siege for their convention... the R's will have a brokered convention and draft their nominee (or something equally enthralling).

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 08:39 | 2112213 blindfaith
blindfaith's picture




They used to fix the vote by handing you cash to vote for some guy.

Boy I miss the old days.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:49 | 2111657 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Thanks for the link to that documentary, Parabolic.

It's pretty incredible how far we've let ourselves fall since we were a collectively proud, but independently stubborn people, who knew what was up, and who served whom.

How far we've fallen.... sad...


p.s. - nice avatar.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 01:13 | 2111926 DollarMenu
DollarMenu's picture

Thanks Parabolic.

Great information in that movie.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:25 | 2111101 ian807
ian807's picture

Sigh. Remember when the Onion was satire.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:35 | 2111131 midtowng
midtowng's picture

That was a long time ago. They've actually been unintentionally predicting the future for the last decade.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:13 | 2111203 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

Trixie: You will be free to come and go through your own front fuckin' door, and as you lay in your beddy-bye, I'll pop from the wall like Grandma Groundhog in a story book and attend to your johnson, as he'd not see you jeopardize your mayor's campaign whore-fuckin' in your place of business. And I'll have installed in room 3-fuckin'-C or the like of Shaunessey's adjacent shitbox, that he's paid Shaunessey to cut a hole through to ease my fuckin' fuckin' you.
Sol Star: Swearengen has?
Trixie: Who the fuck was I just talking to?
Sol Star: I don't know, you said you'd just gone to piss.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:58 | 2111400 Sunshine n Lollipops
Sunshine n Lollipops's picture

The best show evah. They made Mamet seem pedestrian.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:57 | 2111539 4horse
4horse's picture

B: pedestrian?

A: pedestrian.

[significant staring]

A: made it seem pedestrian.

[significance itself]







C pedestrian

                      {not step1 without stepping in it}

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 13:14 | 2113203 Sunshine n Lollipops
Sunshine n Lollipops's picture

That certainly clears things up.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:25 | 2111104 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

Wouldn't surprise me if that hack Rove gave the primary results before the polls even closed like in Iowa.

Election fraud? Not happening in America... right? Right?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:46 | 2111145 RiverRoad
RiverRoad's picture

It's all done with the absentee ballots, folks......(no joke).

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:50 | 2111252 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Who cares? It's all factional in-fighting anyway, and matters not a lick which puppet wins the throne (other than the flavor of lies).

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:46 | 2111375 HK
HK's picture

So true NA, here's a copy of Ron Paul's platform..... from 1958:

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:17 | 2111448 DosZap
DosZap's picture


Yes, the sitting PompousPotus,makes sure the military never gets their absentee ballots in time to be counted.

And if the winner is actually losing, or lost, a few TRUNKFULS show up, and the people in charge make sure these FOUND votes get officially counted.

When you see those votes allowed you know the game is rigged.(like for Mr.Clitorus )

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:25 | 2111105 a growing concern
a growing concern's picture

Bullish for hanging chads.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:36 | 2111132 tmosley
tmosley's picture

I'd trade all the hanging chads in the world for one hanging Ben and one hanging Timmah.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:45 | 2111165 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

DIEBOLD (With a Vengance)... bitchez!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:05 | 2111192 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

They are all chads now...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:05 | 2111193 wisefool
wisefool's picture

I see them ...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:51 | 2111254 blindman
blindman's picture

i have a vial of chads from the florida
2000 election. i saved them thinking that
someday someone would want to buy them for
lots of federal reserve notes as like ...
a piece of history, americana of the extinct
and abstract, like anti-artifacts or something?
anyone interested?
item description: little pieces of circular
type paper in a plastic vial labeled
" certified florida chad , 11/2000 " or something like that.
also, if there is interest i can make more !
you can leave your orders here or if you are in
a hurry just make your own.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:33 | 2111347 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

I sold my VIAL (venetian glass ~ not PLASTIC), last week for:

I printed them all up out of thin air!

You're late to the Ponzi there Bernie...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:51 | 2111384 blindman
blindman's picture

you sold too soon !
i will buy your venitian vial and sell
for ........
100o ta,ta, t trillion dollars !

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:57 | 2111397 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

As soon as 'the Bernank' puts down his glass of Manischewitz, he'll print that up for you...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:35 | 2111490 Nobody For President
Nobody For President's picture

Raise you one Dimon..,.



Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:27 | 2111110 bank guy in Brussels
bank guy in Brussels's picture

Always worth repeating for the fake American elections:

"You know, comrades," says Stalin, "that I think in regard to this: I consider it completely unimportant who in the party will vote, or how; but what is extraordinarily important is this - who will count the votes, and how."

- Joseph Stalin, quoted in 'Memoirs of Stalin's Former Secretary' (1992), by Boris Bazhanov

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:34 | 2111127 omar
omar's picture

It clear thinking like that, thats seen him rise to the very top! 

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:31 | 2111112 Pretorian
Pretorian's picture

Vote counting is alwyas at secret location. Thats why Ron Paul leads in every poll and loses even to the third runner! But this video is LOL the best for the oldest democracy in the world!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:29 | 2111115 W10321303
W10321303's picture

Watch out Kenilworth, Karl Rove knows where you live! AND he knows which airport you fly your Cessna out of too!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:30 | 2111116 distopiandreamboy
distopiandreamboy's picture

Good thing I plan to vote twice

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:46 | 2111168 Agent P
Agent P's picture

You write well for a dead person in Chicago.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:47 | 2111247 Papasmurf
Papasmurf's picture

I will 2

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:47 | 2111249 Papasmurf
Papasmurf's picture

I will 2

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:31 | 2111117 hannah
hannah's picture


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:37 | 2111134 dexter_morgan
dexter_morgan's picture

Don't worry, scrote. There are plenty of 'tards out there living really kick-ass lives. My first wife was 'tarded. She's a pilot now.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:37 | 2111138 Matt
Matt's picture

Actually, it just showed Romney with 48% of the vote. 52% for Barry?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:41 | 2111150 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

I think it's the republican nomination.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:32 | 2111123 hannah
hannah's picture

planeo en la votación de varias veces y no soy incluso legal...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:32 | 2111124 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:40 | 2111147 Tyler Durden
Tyler Durden's picture
Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:10 | 2111432 erg
erg's picture

Kang: (as Bob Dole) Abortions for all!

(Crowd boos)

Kang: Very well, no abortions for anyone!

(Crowd boos again)

Kang: Hmm...Abortions for some, miniature American flags for others!

(Crowd cheers and waves miniature flags.)

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:04 | 2111554 Diet Coke and F...
Diet Coke and Floozies's picture

Awesome... I was in college when I first saw that... Brings back the memories...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:46 | 2111164 carguym14
carguym14's picture

No,No!Vote for Kodos!!!

 eta-That was a classic episode!!!And why we are where we are today.......


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:35 | 2111130 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

altho this is humor, when you consider that the election fraud has been contracted out along with everything else, it's kinda sad, too...

people usta make good livings doing this!

now?  rent-collecting machines!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:37 | 2111136 midtowng
midtowng's picture

By contracting it out to a private firm that makes it more efficient.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:53 | 2111176 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Frankly I'd rather toss it up for debate than do any reasearch on it... but...


Here's as far as I was even motivated to seek...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:08 | 2111286 Dapper Dan
Dapper Dan's picture

a Thomas W. Swidarski

Born: c. 1959
Birthplace: Pittsburgh, PA

Gender: Male
Race or Ethnicity: White
Occupation: Business

Nationality: United States
Executive summary: CEO of Diebold

University: BA Marketing and Management, University of Dayton (1980)
University: MBA Business Management, Cleveland State University (1983)

Diebold CEO (2005-)
Diebold COO (2005)
Diebold President (2005-)
Diebold Senior VP Financial Self-Service Group (2001-05)
Diebold VP Global Marketing (1999-2001)
Diebold Senior Director WW Marketing (1998-99)
Diebold Director of Financial Industry Marketing (1996-98)
PNC Financial VP and Director of Consumer Marketing, PNC Bank (1985-96)
AmeriTrust Retail Analyst (1980-85)
Member of the Board of Diebold (2005-)
Bush-Cheney '04


Past CEO

Wally O'Dell

AKA Walden W. O'Dell

Born: c. 1945
Birthplace: St. Louis, MO

Gender: Male
Race or Ethnicity: White
Sexual orientation: Straight
Occupation: Business
Party Affiliation: Republican

Nationality: United States
Executive summary: CEO of Diebold, 1999-2005

In August 2003, corporate CEO Walden O'Dell mailed out 100 invitations for a political fundraiser at his 10,800-square-foot home outside Columbus, Ohio. The $1,000-a-plate dinner was to benefit the Ohio state Republican party's 2004 campaign fund. A diehard Republican and Bush Pioneer, O'Dell stated in the letter that "I am committed to helping Ohio deliver its electoral votes to the President next year."

The problem? O'Dell was President, Chairman, and CEO of Diebold -- an electronic voting machine manufacturer. They make the actual touchscreen systems that record votes on election day. When asked about the partisan fundraiser, a company spokesperson averred: "It's not part of Diebold. It's what Wally does in his own home."

O'Dell eventually resigned as CEO in December 2005.

November 2002 interview with CNBC:


BILL GRIFFETH: How tamperproof are these voting machines? That seems to be a concern of some who feel that it only takes one person, one hacker who can screw up an entire election. How valid is that criticism, Mr. O'Dell? O'DELL: Well, there's always risks, but, you know, these things are not connected to the Internet. They're individual -- precinct by precinct, location by location. They're doublechecked before they're sent out. We think the technology is fabulous and very bulletproof.

Father: Lou Ruvo
Wife: Patricia (four children)
Son: Michael
Son: Patrick
Daughter: Jennifer

University: BS Electrical Engineering, Ohio State University
University: MS Electrical Engineering, St. Louis University
University: MBA, Stanford University
Administrator: Trustee, Ohio State University (2003-)

Diebold President and CEO (1999-2005)
Member of the Board of Diebold (as Chairman, -2005)
Member of the Board of Lennox International (2003-06)
Boys & Girls Clubs of America National Trustee
Columbus Association of Performing Arts Board of Directors
Bush-Cheney '04
Ohio Business Roundtable
Ohio Foundation of Independent Colleges Trustee
United Way Greater Stark County Board
Bush Pioneer 2000
Dubya Ranch Hand Aug-2003
Bush Pioneer 2004

Ripped from

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:36 | 2111357 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

They're doublechecked before they're sent out

Hear that people?... They're DOUBLECHECKED...

Wow... Now I can sleep tonight! Thank you so much!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:06 | 2111420 Bringin It
Bringin It's picture
Princeton University Exposes Diebold Flaws


UCSB Scientists Reveal Vote Hacking

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 05:29 | 2112105 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture


O'DELL: Well, there's always risks, but, you know, these things are not connected to the Internet. They're individual -- precinct by precinct, location by location. They're doublechecked before they're sent out. We think the technology is fabulous and very bulletproof. [Not to mention a profitable monopoly!]


That is, until the numbers are fed into the master computer, which will count the votes whichever way the programmers have set it up!


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:38 | 2111141 RiverRoad
RiverRoad's picture

Diebold predicts Dewey WIN!!!!!!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:40 | 2111146 kill switch
Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:40 | 2111148 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

Slightly off topic, but well worth it...The American Homeland Security all it's glory and splendor.


Here are a few highlights from the story:

British pair arrested in U.S. on terror charges over Twitter jokes

Two British tourists were barred from entering America after joking on Twitter that they were going to 'destroy America' and 'dig up Marilyn Monroe'.

The Department of Homeland Security flagged him as a potential threat when he posted an excited tweet to his pals about his forthcoming trip to Hollywood which read: 'Free this week, for quick gossip/prep before I go and destroy America?'

After making their way through passport control at Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) last Monday afternoon the pair were detained by armed guards.

Despite telling officials the term 'destroy' was British slang for 'party', they were held on suspicion of planning to 'commit crimes' and had their passports confiscated.

Leigh was also quizzed about another tweet which quoted hit US comedy Family Guy which read: '3 weeks today, we're totally in LA p****** people off on Hollywood Blvd and diggin' Marilyn Monroe up!

Federal agents even searched his suitcase looking for spades and shovels, claiming Emily was planning to act as Leigh's 'look out' while he raided Marilyn's tomb.

Bar manager Leigh, from Coventry, and Emily, 24, from Birmingham, were then quizzed for five hours at LAX before they were handcuffed and put into a van with illegal immigrants and locked up overnight.

They spent 12 hours in separate holding cells before being driven back to the airport where they were put on a plane home via Paris.

Emily said: 'The officials told us we were not allowed in to the country because of Leigh's tweet. They wanted to know what we were going to do.

'They asked why we wanted to destroy America and we tried to explain it meant to get trashed and party.

'I almost burst out laughing when they asked me if I was going to be Leigh's lookout while he dug up Marilyn Monroe.

'I couldn't believe it because it was a quote from the comedy Family Guy which is an American show.

Leigh said: 'It's just so ridiculous it's almost funny but at the time it was really scary. The Homeland Security agents were treating me like some kind of terrorist.

'I kept saying to them they had got the wrong meaning from my tweet but they just told me "you've really f***** up with that tweet boy".

Leigh and Emily have now been told they must apply for visas from the US Embassy in London before flying to the US again.
Read more:


And that's your tax dollar at works boys and girls! Ain't ya proud?


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:46 | 2111167 duo
duo's picture

Humor, the new subversive element.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:10 | 2111199 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

The oldest, I think. 

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:19 | 2111209 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Laughing all the way... to Gitmo...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:16 | 2111205 seek
seek's picture

This story is much more imporant than it appears. I know most of the coverage has been along the lines of either "look how stupid homeland security is" or "look how stupid these people are."

The significance is twofold: time and integration. The tweets happened a relatively short time before the trip, and while the names on the twitter accounts were close to their actual names, they weren't exactly the same, and DHS was able to connect the tweets to the persons traveling and intercept them on arrival.

Seems silly, but think of the level of processing that's taking place here, with millions of travelers, and hundreds of millions to billons of tweets, and the DHS has to be sucking them all up and correlating. Granted the processing is brain dead because of not understanding context and slang -- but it happened.

Shit like this has me very close to deleting several online accounts and switching to randomized proxies for everything, because, as Cardinal Richelieu said, "Give me six lines written by the most honest man in the world, and I will find enough in them to hang him." DHS obviously didn't care if they were innocent or not -- Maslow's maxim of when your only tool is a hammer, all problems are nails applies.

This is really troubling stuff.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:30 | 2111221 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

They can find this inane tweet and detain two innocent people....yet 1.2 billion dollars can "vanish" from MF Global...and all the kings horses and all the kings men can't seem to find a single person to hold responsible.

Go figure....

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:40 | 2111230 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Ummm......excuse me.

The MF Global money did not "vanish". It "vaporized". Resistance is futile.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming already in progress.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:01 | 2111275 nmewn
nmewn's picture

It is fascinating how fiat paper tends to do that on a regular basis.

Why, its almost like it never comes from nothing and returns to nothing...poof!!!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:08 | 2111284 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Just like your VOTE...

What a cornucopia of coincidences we have going here tonight... "Unified Field Theory" to come along in 5...4...3...2...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:36 | 2111491 nmewn
nmewn's picture

lol...well, at least tomorrow when I vote and again in November, I will have paid in full for my privelge to bitch & moan at whatever the outcome.

No one will ever be able to point at me and say I'm part of the problem instead of a part of a peaceful solution no matter what happens. Its not that I'm diametrically opposed to the other...its just that I'll do anything to derail the broken window theory of Krugman & his ilk ;-)

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:50 | 2111528 John_Coltrane
John_Coltrane's picture

Yep, money creation is like a vacuum fluctuation, such as virtual electron-positron pair (e.g. debit and credit).  Now you see it now you don't!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:53 | 2111257 fuu
fuu's picture

Well said alien-IQ and Seek.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:33 | 2111223 ThisIsBob
ThisIsBob's picture

ex-spam there are 600 tweets per second, says Twitter.

Apparently "they" are reading and remembering them all.


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:11 | 2111293 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

"They"... apparently referring to the 4 million EMPLOYED people whose jobs were "created or saved"?

Or "Gupta" and his friends in India?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:11 | 2111547 Think for yourself
Think for yourself's picture

It's much more than that, because not only tweets are monitored, but also all major forums, chatrooms, blogs, social networks. If one is not monitored yet you still have to assume it is since it can be monitored retroactively by scanning through past content.

Then you also have to remember that it is not only read but analyzed semantically and cross-referenced with reading habits, interests, opinions, all of these being extracted from cookies, browsing history, search queries. This allows the identification of the different personaes that are embodied by the same individual - it does not matter if the label is different if the node is in the same exact position in many different cross-referenced networks you place it in, you know it is the same node. Again if something is not yet done you still have to assume it will be soon, retroactively.

Then also take into account that your interactions as an agent, an individual social node in the variety of environments - work, extended family, friends, different communities you hang out at online - can be modelized as well, extracting cultural, social, intellectual, philosophical influence on peers of different types and social proximity, while your suggerability may be analyzed as well in the different direction. This would be done by analysis of retweeting, +1s, "likes", quotes, and other manifestations of active interaction, as well as of passive interaction through network analysis. This might be somewhat easily be conflated into an ominous threat factor which goes far beyond what the individual believe, says or does, but rather an organic measure of the subject's inherent destabilization potential to the system.

Now, I have seen crude version of this - free, public analysis that tracks down an individual multiple online personas and extracts measurements of how central to his networks he is and how influential/influenced he is. As a programmer I can understand how this is modeled and how this might (has already, in all likelyhood) be extended and deepened into what I described. Googling your name is so late 90's. We're now talking bleeding edge data-mining and network analysis applied to the reality of the connected individual. Again, if not done yet you have to assume it will be done, retroactively, although knowing I am at most a below-grade programmer and no cyberneticist, systems analyst or what have you, what is currently brewing in labs is probably a decade ahead of what I do already conceive. Deleting your facebook profile won't help nor will cleaning other profiles either, not when the data has already been extracted and backups of the most travelled parts of the internet are available to be re-analyzed with new methods retroactively.

Even by clearing all the online history you can, the node that represents you will still exist, waiting for new data entries which fits the patterns already observed to connect that node with new personas. You're even more fucked if you were vocal at some point on accounts that were directly linked to real name, and your real name is not that common. I mean, the only reason I don't state my name here is by principle, and that I like thinking about ideas that stand for themselves, irrespective of the anonymous nature of the alias behind it. I have a gmail and youtube tab open in this same browser, running on windows, and no expectations that TPTB should be unable to identify this alias solely for the fact that there is no directly referentiable personal data on this account.

Funny thing is, the realization of this drove me in the opposite direction to the GP. When it clicked that I had already tagged myself as a hellraiser by my online behaviour a few years ago, I simply radicalized and started saying exactly what I wanted to say about anything I had to say. When there is nothing to fear anymore you can just go full throttle. Be a light unto yourself and fucking be a man about it.

We're talking 2012. Time to remove the training wheels, bitches! 

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:42 | 2111239 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

I see all this, but have a different slant.

They can put a case together fast. They are out there "putting cases together" in the first place. These things are true.

But this is the one they chose to flex for us on? Seriously? Are they trying to look like Keystone cops? Or are they just Keystone cops? As in "I don't give a shit, where is my check, Keystone cops."

Everyone who plays on this blog here is in soooooo much trouble if that story is what it seems. And folks on many other blogs. All of us. And they should have come for at least some of us by now. We joke, hoot, and holler here like crazy. If they are that dumb, they are really scared of us.

If they want to put together a bad story about you, they can and will. Something is missing. Like the homeland security employee is an "ex" of one of these two travelers who has a stupid, ladder climbing boss who is trying to look tough so they hand him/her this and express "concern."

I say this as I watch things like it unfolding around me personally.  


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:07 | 2111282 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Someone posted this earlier:

And then there was this:

Anyone giving a tip that you may be in possession could potentially cost you your life. This stupid 'War on Drugs' is actually a war on minorities, the poor, and you...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:14 | 2111300 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

In 1997 Newt Gingrich Proposed The Death Penalty For Marijuana Possession.

How do you like them apples?

And people really want this man running the country?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:24 | 2111322 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Hell, I don't even want that fucker IN this country anymore...I think he and Obama share the same agenda but they are polar opposites in demeanor. I think G-boy would order you dead, with the full faith and power of the Office, if you so much as farted in his general direction. None of this Hopey Changey stuff, more like Hang'em or Bang'em...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:25 | 2111325 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:17 | 2111309 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Are they trying to look like Keystone cops? Or are they just Keystone cops?

Answer: YES


Don't TEAR OUR RISE (in EEEEE-Bon-ICKS) & you're probably ok... If I'm WRONG then you were just fucked in the first place and never stood a chance anyway...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:43 | 2111367 PY-129-20
PY-129-20's picture

Unfolding? Papperlapapp! I will bring my old and rusty Panther Tank to America (in my secret, well-hidden German submarine of course) if something happens to you or your family. I mean - come on - what could go wrong? A crazy German in an old, rusty Nazi tank playing a bit Blitzkrieg in your front garden...

I will put a liberation flag on it. A sweet, freedom loving Germania - a bit shy with her new sword and the chains broken - with her girlfriend, Lady Liberty.

Trust me - I know what I am doing.

And now back to Lala-Land - I mean Middle-Earth (I mean this sleep thing) It's late here in Germany. And cold. And when I will wake up tomorrow - I will see Mutti - I mean Merkel on the front pages, smiling with her superfriend Sarkozy. And all those darn journalist will hail her new efforts. Ooops. She did it again. She rescued Europe again (euro rescue meeting no. 418). And after reading the newspaper I will be surrounded by my brave and very grumpy fellow-countryman. You see why I need these fantasies? Let's hope my brain produces some good dreams. Good night, Ms Creant. (And please, don't let Lady Liberty down. She is an old lady, but still looking good (especially on those silver coins.) ;)

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:03 | 2111551 nmewn
nmewn's picture

"I will put a liberation flag on it. A sweet, freedom loving Germania - a bit shy with her new sword and the chains broken - with her girlfriend, Lady Liberty."


Tue, 01/31/2012 - 00:49 | 2111896 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Sweet dreams indeed!!

We may need you and your tank yet. The sub would be handy too. 

When I was a girl, I had a secret seven story complex beneath the ground in my back yard. Each level had a function, one for planning missions, one for training on equipment (firing range, workout studio) etc. Seven was the number needed. All the boys I had crushes on were in the organization. They all wore white jeans and white denim jackets, each with a different colored turtle neck that was his special color. My girlfriends were agents in my organization as well. We had a giant olympic sized swimming pool on the the lowest level where we swam all the time. It would make sense for you to park the sub there. ;-)

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 05:37 | 2112110 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Ahem!  I don't know what you're talking about; I've NEVER espoused assassinating Obamatron on the Intrawebz, and I will turn you in to DHS/TSA if you say otherwise!  (I LUV Big Brother!!) </sarc> [for all the lurkers at the NSA/FBI/DHS/Secret Service and the BFD]

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:29 | 2111340 spankfish
spankfish's picture

This well beyond carnivore.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:15 | 2111568 pods
pods's picture

The speed that they pieced this together absolutely means that carnivore, TIA, or whatever new name the system is running under.

Seems we are closer to the Jason Bourne movies than we could ever believe.

"Black Briar."

Who wants to be that all those real big Google server farms are a bit bigger than Google needs?

Or why there is a real status quo effort to make "social networks" as saturated as can be? 

Single biggest open source intelligence gathering operation ever run.


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 23:48 | 2111789 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

Google Camps............

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:41 | 2111362 Bwahaha WAGFDSMB
Bwahaha WAGFDSMB's picture

Engage in arbitrary detention and release is step 6 on the road to fascism.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:33 | 2111485 Bringin It
Bringin It's picture

And step #7 is Control the Press?  That was step #1 wasn't it?  What's Naomi up to?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:50 | 2111253 Goldilocks
Goldilocks's picture

Amy Winehouse - Rehab (3:42)

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:55 | 2111266 rosiescenario
rosiescenario's picture

So, if you are a real terrorist, do not tweet in English, especially if you are announcing your plans and soon to make a trip to the U.S.


This reminds me of something that happened right after 911: I tried to mail some letter, but had not put my return address on them. The local post office informed me that it was now required so I provided it thinking all the while this must be an IQ test for terrorists....I knew right then that we had some real idiots running this operation.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:17 | 2111444 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

Did you, quite properly, make up a return address?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:13 | 2111299 GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

Perhaps the current administration doesn't like competition: "It's MY country and I am going to destroy it, not some British imperialist!"

Gotta go see who's banging on my door....

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 05:32 | 2112107 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Well, Marilyn's tomb is a matter of national security...

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 07:11 | 2112143 Benjamin Glutton
Benjamin Glutton's picture

I guess I can expect a visit from DHS nazis any day. This is tame compared to my daily dialog with other internet comedians.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:42 | 2111155 Stax Edwards
Stax Edwards's picture


We have gotten the megaphone we have been seeking.  Big money endowments are moving in our favor, and there is a chance, however slight, that we may see justice in due time.  There is a new state of duress on our most well bought and paid for politicos to settle with the big banks this week for their misdeeds.  While I will reserve judgement of those proceedings to the individual, it seems pivotal, IMO, that we hold off onthis sort of thing at present.  There are now statesmen putting their money behind our efforts to return our country to the rule of law, so holding off on a settlement at this time is essential.  Lets dig deeper before we give another sweetheart deal to our banker overlords.  Contact your well paid for congress critter and tell them to hold off.  The backing we are now finding is a seminal event in the future of our idiocracy.  Keep pushing and fighting the good fight, brothers.


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:39 | 2111232 Stax Edwards
Stax Edwards's picture

Anybody home?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:48 | 2111250 my puppy for prez
my puppy for prez's picture

What in the heck are you saying?

Are you being "Onion-ish", or just cryptic?  

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:36 | 2111492 Stax Edwards
Stax Edwards's picture

Neither.  I am saying that their are good people putting good money behind solid crowd sourced ideas.  So expound your wisdom change is coming.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:45 | 2111159 dexter_morgan
dexter_morgan's picture

President Camacho: Now I understand everyone's shit's emotional right now. But I've got a 3 point plan that's going to fix EVERYTHING.
Congressman #1: Break it down, Camacho!
President Camacho: Number 1: We've got this guy Not Sure. Number 2: He's got a higher IQ than ANY MAN ALIVE. and Number 3: He's going to fix EVERYTHING.

sub Obummer for Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho.......and u get the idea

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:54 | 2111178 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

You left off Dear Leader's best quote:


And we runnin' out of French Fries and burrito coverings.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:55 | 2111183 wisefool
wisefool's picture

Wasn't that Hank Paulson? I mean Timmy? I mean Corzine?

And I think Biden is actually playing the role of Camacho.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:50 | 2111174 kill switch
kill switch's picture


Coping With Democracy

Fred Reed

Overcoming The Shame Of Voting

I guess I need my consciousness raised. The newspapers keep fussing and fidgeting because Americans don't vote. Something is wrong with us Gringos, they say. We're shirking. We're no damn good.


I look at the last ten or so presidents we've had, and think: hooboy, is that what comes of voting? Every one of those reprobates was elected. It's a historical fact. If we can't get any better results by voting, I figure we ought to make it a misdemeanor.

How much faith can you put in a system that, out of 280,000,000 people, comes up with Al Gore? Besides, there's the question of culpability. If I voted for one reprehensible nonentity in preference to another, and he won, I would reckon that he was my fault. I don't want a President on my conscience. Further, I do not see how anyone with the slightest self-respect could vote.

Anyway, you can't vote for a candidate, because there aren't any. The apparent existence of candidates is a sleight-of-hand.

Do you believe that, say, Gore is a candidate? No. He, like any candidate, is a committee consisting of three speechwriters, a gestures coach, two pollsters, a makeup artist, an image consultant, and several crooked advisers. An alleged candidate is a phantasm, a blank slate or, in the case of Al, a mass of unflavored bean curd.

A candidate is what his advisers tell you he is. Think about it. Often you can read in the Washington Post that the candidate, Senator Palmoil, say, is having image problems. Focus groups have discovered, the writer will explain, that he is seen as Insufficiently Manly, that he is not thought by the voters to be adequately decisive, and that his delivery of a speech is positively Caesarian.

The paper will announce that his handlers have decided that he needs to Adjust His Image. That is, the principal organ of Washington will announce to all the world that the Senator Palmoil is about to pretend to be something he isn't. It will also name the advertising agency hired to perform the mummery.

Sure enough, in his next appearance on television, Palmoil will appear wearing a codpiece. It may have a NOW sticker on it so as not to be threatening to women, and not be excessively protuberant, and perhaps be in an ambiguous beige so as not to be clearly black or white, but it will look no end manly. He will then say Something Decisive, invented for him by the speechwriters and crooked advisers. He will contemplate at the teleprompter with an unblinking pole-axed stare, to communicate firmness, and avoid waving his hands around as if he were swatting bugs.

For the next week the talking heads of the Yankee Capital will drone about the effectiveness of the candidate's access of masculinity, about the precise tone of voice in the saying of Something Decisive, and whether the NOW sticker on the codpiece was overkill. In short, the mechanism of deception will be discussed until it collapses into rubble.

Yet, though detailed in advance, though explained in its every calculated nuance, it will work. The polls will show that, yes, the Merkun People now believe that Senator Palmoil is now of one blood with Clint Eastwood, and that his newly-acquired earnest intonation has satisfied voters of his warm and rich inner life.

I'm going to vote for that?

Anyway, you won't know who you're electing until after you have elected him. A campaign is intended to hide the candidate, not to reveal him. The truth is that few candidates have the knowledge or experience to run a Shriners' picnic. Occasionally the veil slips. Recently it was revealed that George the Shrub, son of Bush, didn't know the names of the leaders of several mildly important countries. Do you believe that any of them do? The candidates usually are provincial governors, men who have spent their lives crawling up the ladder from law school to county chairman. How could they know of the likelihood of a Baluchi irredentist movement or where to find Bishkek?

Now, the professionals of Washington, the reporters and chattering craniums and mechanics of the image trades, do not see things just this way. They take elections seriously, odd though it may seem. They do not understand that they are hucksters playing an elaborate shell game, yet they carefully shield the scam from public gaze. The rule in journalism is that it is acceptable, indeed career-promoting, to trick the candidate into saying something unwise about abortion. It is not acceptable to show that he knows far less about the world than most of the reporters covering him.

Note that a news weasel will ask a candidate, "Governor, what is your position on Afghanistan?" The reporter will not ask, "Governor, precisely where is Afghanistan?" The governor will respond to the first question by saying that he favors decency and motherhood, a better life for all Afghans, and human rights for everybody. The response would equally apply to Key Largo or central Illinois. He doesn't know where Afghanistan is.

Oddly, keeping the voters from learning that the candidate does know anything (an unlikely circumstance, but it has happened) is as important as concealing that he doesn't. The voters will resent anyone more intelligent than they are, which we in Washington assume means anyone at all. If a candidate ever mentioned the influence of Sophia of Anhalt-Zerbst as empress of Russia in continuing the policies of modernization of Peter the Great, he would (or so it is feared) lose the election immediately.

The French will elect a man because he is intelligent and cultured. We want someone we can imagine managing a minor Safeway.

A crucial point however is that American elections are not about policy, but about the division of spoils-appointments, contracts, invitations to parties at the White House. Sure, Republicans behave slightly differently from Democrats-but only slightly. Which is to say that elections don't matter.

The economy determines the fate of this country. Presidents don't. They are at worst annoyances and embarrassments, at best a sort of national hobby. What counts is Intel, Microsoft, Boeing, Lucent Technologies, Cisco, AT&T, agribusiness, the Internet. We survive on a strong economic back and a weak governmental mind. Always have, always will.

Vote? Why?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:07 | 2111194 Sweet Chicken
Sweet Chicken's picture



WHY VOTE??????

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:28 | 2111217 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

The French will elect a man because he is intelligent and cultured. We want someone we can imagine managing a minor Safeway...

- Last time we voted for someone for someone who was a community organizer (& hadn't "managed" so much as a Dairy Queen)

- The time before that, some dude who bought & sold a major league baseball team with daddy's money

- the time before that... well I don't know ~ don't ask me (but there were a lot of dead people in his trail)

- the time before that... the father of the guy whose kid had the baseball team

- before that... an actor

- before that... a peanut farmer...

My summary??? YES, I suppose you're right... Vote? Why?


Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:39 | 2111233 RiverRoad
RiverRoad's picture

The candidates that the Fed gives us to vote for every four years gets more ridiculous each time.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:41 | 2111364 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Well... In their defense (or support), I have to say that since it's been determined that they:

- have zero effect on employment

- have zero handle on inflation targets

...all that leaves them time to do then is to conjure up ridiculous candidates... SEE? At least there's 'something' they're good at...

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 03:02 | 2112022 baby_BLYTHE
baby_BLYTHE's picture

sadly enough, Benocide was actually congradulated on achieving his desired inflation target at his latest press conferance by an economic reporter. When Hyper-Inflation comes in earnest and we see 1,000% inflation every quarter, these shills will have the last laugh!

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 03:15 | 2112029 Vic Vinegar
Vic Vinegar's picture

sadly enough, the quality of my life has actually diminished as you have started commenting here less due to reasons I cannot understand.  When I get to meet you on the Rockstar Energy Drink Mayhem Tour, perhaps we can both have a laugh!

(great pic BTW)

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:54 | 2111179 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

OT : Intervention is close.

White House: UNSC should not allow Assad regime to continue with violent crackdown (Reuters)

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:27 | 2111218 ozziindaus
ozziindaus's picture

Add Syria to the list of western prostituted sovereign nations.

There is absolutely no escape from this globalization shit. How do I form my own Axis of Evil nation? I'll take an island anywhere (sunshine, fresh water, coconuts and a dirt bike trial). Just leave me the fuck alone. 

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:55 | 2111265 nyse
nyse's picture

This will likely have to be off planet somewhere. Good luck!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:17 | 2111310 GeezerGeek
GeezerGeek's picture

May I suggest you adopt the Gadsden flag, using your last sentence as the motto?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 18:54 | 2111180 Misean
Misean's picture

I vote when I trade Feral noReserve TP into gold, silver and lead.

I sleep better. Virtual voting is for American Karaoke.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:02 | 2111188 celticgold
celticgold's picture



Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:13 | 2111201 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Two Senators voted AGAINST (93-2) the Stock Act today (act that prevents congressional members from insider trading).

Senator Coburn (GOP Oklahoma)

Senator Burr (GOP North Carolina).

For those people living in these states, remember this at election time.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:35 | 2111226 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

More importantly...

What are they short & long on?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:41 | 2111237 HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

I doubt they are short anything.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:10 | 2111292 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Brains? Morals? Scruples? Balls?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:21 | 2111316 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

...all conveniently contained in the same scrotum sack... It's a bio-engineering wonder I tell ya!

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:09 | 2111279 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

I hope you don't actually believe this legislation is going to mean anything. When have they ever passed legislation that they didn't profit from? I'd rather have the two who are honest about being a crook than the other 98 who are going to lie and pass meaningless legislation so you think they aren't.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:11 | 2111294 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Just as importantly...

Not Voting - 5 Isakson (R-GA)
Kirk (R-IL) Landrieu (D-LA)
Menendez (D-NJ) Wicker (R-MS)

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:21 | 2111454 RmcAZ
RmcAZ's picture

Anyone know by chance why Coburn voted against? I was under the impression that he was in the same "mold" as Ron/Rand Paul. I wonder what other BS was put into this bill... haven't read it yet.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:31 | 2111481 RmcAZ
RmcAZ's picture

Nvm, found here:

He proposed some pretty sensible amendments to it IMO. To me this feels like something they are just trying to shove through to make it look like they are doing something... but my best guess is there will still be more than enough loopholes for congress to capitalize on insider info.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:59 | 2111234 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

Who cares what immoral President we have when we are clearly living in a society wallowing in the depths of it's own moral depravity. We live in a society that lacks the value of family (55% divorce rate), a society that is reliant on government handouts (over 50% of households now on the receiving end of government aid), a society that values idols like Lady Gaga, a society where a residential robber can sue you for hurting himself robbing your house. 

This is a country that lacks a homogenous vision. It's a country that lacks leadership. And it's a country that does not respect it's tradion and history. 

When the time comes for America to pay it's bill it will be said that no one saw the collapse. The collapse has been ongoing and visible to anyone with a set of eyes, and there is no bastion to stop the ultimate eventuality when it arrives in due course. When the stinging reality finally strikes, it then like now, will be someone elses fault, when if one wants to know the true culprit one only needs to look into a mirror.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:17 | 2111308 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

I'm voting based on which candidate looks the best in a suit made of free range beef.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:21 | 2111314 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

Nancy Pelosi's face isn't running (sorry). Best second choice would be Mitt Romneys hair.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:23 | 2111320 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

don't pepper WB7 with any ideas like that... I might accidentally "click" on it & I doubt I'd ever recover...

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