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Diebold Leaks Election Results Early... Again

Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/30/2012 18:23 -0400

Yes, it has happened before, but since truth is timeless, we were not surprised to find that it has been "leaked" again, in this timeless clip from TheOnion which explains everything one needs to know about the upcoming "elections"

h/t Mike Krieger

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Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:46 | 2111373 Dr. Engali

So you're voting for Lady GaGa?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:26 | 2111468 BLOTTO

Lady Gaga is a scum bag piece of shit singing the tunes for her illuminati masters.

And dont forget she is the godmother to Elton John and his partners baby. She even met the Queen - the royal occult highness herself...

http://ca.images.search.yahoo.com/search/images?_adv_prop=image&fr=yfp-t-715-s&va=lady+gaga+and+queen+elizabeth

They are all scum bags.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:42 | 2111241 junkyardjack

Thank god, I had sobered up so I could figure out which guy to vote for. Back to popping pills

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:43 | 2111242 tony bonn

i actually believe that the onion outcome may occur if obama suddenly becomes a liability or his fake birth certificate is exposed...but he has been great for banksters and the mic so he still has a chance....it all depends upon whether the sheople want to believe that cock and bull story about his natural citizenship and whether they have bought into george bush's exposure of the constitution as nothing but a goddamned piece of paper..so far bush has proven prophetic.....

www.familyofsecrets.com

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:45 | 2111246 nyse

"He'll give up on election day - when he's supposed to."

This is awesome.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:49 | 2111251 Dr. Engali

"Newt GinGrinch will not give up Just because he lost the election. He will give up like he is supposed to in election day "

Hilarious. At least we can laugh at the absurdity of it all. I think that if I couldn't laugh about it I'd go mad.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 19:57 | 2111268 rosiescenario

Don't blame me....I voted for Ron in the last presidential election. My friends said that was a waste....I say it was less of a waste than casting it for the alternatives presented.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 01:57 | 2111976 DollarMenu

Ron who?

McCain was the R candidate.

Ron Paul did not get to the nomination connvention.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:03 | 2111278 Born Right the ...

gotta love the onion.But seriously folks,this shit ain't funny. I got motivated on this subect after my state,under Tom Delay's say so,re-redisricted in 2002 after GOP takeover. They split my small population county into a gerrimandering mess.split our votes into 4 districts,some areas of my little town litteraly, physically, disconnected from the district they voted for. Then came the help america vote act {HAVA}.I got informed and went to the meetings of county commissioners.The only good thing is I got them to preserve is paper ballots for early voting,as well as absentee.The paper sheets and electronic voting all done on Sequoia systems.And get this,they cannot do recounts of actual paper votes by hand,due to the contract they singed.You can't make this shit up.Needless to say,there has been some interesting results for the past few elections.Bradblog does a good job of covering these subjects nation wide. Also see black box voting. Arn't we all tired of voting for the lesser of two EVILS everytime. As for my politics,I ALWAYS vote for the one that's not in office already.NONE of those FUCKTARDS are working for my benefit. And I vote because I bitch.If you don;t vote,don't bitch about the results.And I know that if voting made a difference,it would be illeagle

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:05 | 2111280 junkyard dog

That was very well done-had me there in the title. Quality stuff.

Now, I read some of the comments here, something I swore I would never do. I just want to know one thing, do you dick licks suck off your own ipad or, do you share like on Facebook.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:22 | 2111295 ThisIsBob

All of facebook is archived and parsed by "them." Dick licks are not permitted to enter the country.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:33 | 2111346 BLOTTO

Interesting that you mention FACEBOOK...CIABOOK...

On the front page of yahoo...1/50...is the story of the guy who is friends with Zuckerberg that made the $400million dollar mistake...blah blah blah...

And 'he walked away from it'...hence the 400mil mistake...

And now coincidently, FACEBOOK is about to launch the IPO for the massess.

Pysch. COnditioning (by the illuminati controlled mass media) is saying DONT make that SAME mistake and make sure you buy the stock.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:10 | 2111289 BLOTTO

So, what does all this add up to?

The truth is we are facing a totalitarian threat... while they maintain the illusion you live in a democratic society - that you are free - in order to decieve the massess...almost like a 'friendly fascism'

What is your point that you drawn a line in the sand? Those of you on the fence...another false flag event?- 10 more flase flags? At some point you will have no choice but to think all occult like...because thats exactly what it is.

We are being ruled by the worst of the fuckin worst - Luciferians - satanists.

We are being duped. We've been lied to about history.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:25 | 2111323 francis_sawyer

So, what does all this add up to?

I've painstakingly done the math on that...

The answer = "1.618"

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:30 | 2111604 Diet Coke and F...

He he he... very good...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:10 | 2111291 lolmao500

Europe should do like Hitler.

http://www.webofdebt.com/articles/bankrupt-germany.php

Hitler and the National Socialists, who came to power in 1933, thwarted the international banking cartel by issuing their own money. In this they took their cue from Abraham Lincoln, who funded the American Civil War with government-issued paper money called "Greenbacks."

Hitler began his national credit program by devising a plan of public works. Projects earmarked for funding included flood control, repair of public buildings and private residences, and construction of new buildings, roads, bridges, canals, and port facilities. The projected cost of the various programs was fixed at one billion units of the national currency. One billion non-inflationary bills of exchange, called Labor Treasury Certificates, were then issued against this cost. Millions of people were put to work on these projects, and the workers were paid with the Treasury Certificates. This government-issued money wasn't backed by gold, but it was backed by something of real value. It was essentially a receipt for labor and materials delivered to the government. Hitler said, "for every mark that was issued we required the equivalent of a mark's worth of work done or goods produced." The workers then spent the Certificates on other goods and services, creating more jobs for more people.

Within two years, the unemployment problem had been solved and the country was back on its feet. It had a solid, stable currency, no debt, and no inflation, at a time when millions of people in the United States and other Western countries were still out of work and living on welfare.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 23:19 | 2111335 nmewn

Yeah, he was a swell guy. Just don't dare disagree with any of his policies.

When you do, the gate you go through will still say..."Arbeit macht frei".

http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/interactive/animations/auschwitz_map/index_embed.shtml

////////////////////////////

Speak up for yourself dickweeds, don't junk and skulk away in silence. Be the Teutonic Knights of your ancestors, of your fantasy, you fearless warriors you...ROTFLMAO!!!

Pussies.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 12:34 | 2113011 Disenchanted

There's always more to the story than what 'accepted' history tells you...and it takes more than one to tango

Headline

London Daily Express

March 24, 1933

Judea Declares War On Germany

Jews Of All The World Unite In Action

see: http://iamthewitness.com/books/Albert.D.Pastore/img/Image155.gif

background:

Zionism and World War II

Let us fast forward our time machine to the early 1930's. Again, there is no need for a detailed analysis and debate of the causes and major events of World War II. The purpose here is to again illustrate yet another case of selfish Zionist agitation for American entry into a war.

The German people were bitterly resentful of not only the Zionist role in bringing about their defeat in World War I, but also over the brutal monetary reparations which had been imposed upon them by certain Zionist bankers who helped craft the brutal Treaty of Versailles after the war. Stripped of formerly German territory, and with the German economy in ruins, the people of Germany elected Adolf Hitler as their Chancellor. Hitler and the Nazi party soon seized control of the German media, banks, and universities away from the influential Zionists who had reigned supreme in those institutions.

Almost immediately, Zionists all over the world began to agitate for action against Germany. Boycotts of German imports were imposed and calls for the UK and USA to take immediate action against Germany began to emanate from Zionist circles. On March 24, 1933, The Daily Express of England carried the bold headline; “Judea Declares War on Germany. Jews of All the World Unite in Action“. (17) The front page story revealed that the Zionists had announced a concerted worldwide effort to isolate Germany and turn other nations against her.

more at: http://iamthewitness.com/books/Albert.D.Pastore/Stranger.than.fiction.ht...

feel free to junk away, it makes no never mind to me. :)

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 20:25 | 2114863 nmewn

The discussion started on Hitler's grand monetary policy and its fantastic relationship with labor.

It fails (naturally) when one observes that this "great labor/monetary policy" was quickly augmented with slave labor where no wages were paid at all. German citizens were worked until they died or were killed outright.

All quite legal and very humane and appreciative of the workers rights.

It was not just the jooos who were slave laborers pilgrim.

It was political dissenters who died under "this law", it was also gypsies, it was common criminals, it was prostitutes, it was communists (of which he was one), it was pacifists, it was the "racially impure", it was those who had sex with the "racially impure", it was the retarded, it was the infirmed and sick...it was whoever didn't conform to what the nazi state thought of as a model citizen.

I've always found it bizarre how people can justify just about anything. The corruption of both mans law and natures, along with the corruption of the soul itself. All within the comfortable confines of their classrooms and homes.

Here is the law of the Volksgerichtshof...the Peoples Court...where the judge also acts as the prosecutor...this is your Nazis Judge Roland Freisler...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8WRJbcLlWE&feature=player_embedded

...the only good thing that ever happened in his life is he died too quickly.

Where I come from its an eye for an eye, you fucking dipshit.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 20:59 | 2114969 Disenchanted

Funny you mentioned none of that in your post prior to mine...and I can't get your BBC link to load at the moment.

But seeing as how that link has the words auswchitz_map in it...

Ah well...such is life.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 22:14 | 2115209 nmewn

Funny you took almost 12hrs to work up the nerve to respond to a comment that wasn't even addressed to you and then you complain you weren't prepared.

Ah well, such is your life.

Dead thread...see ya round the ovens Fritz.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 04:07 | 2112058 Dr. Engali

Wow you actually got up arrows. It's sad to see there are other fascists besides you on this board.

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 07:49 | 2112178 nmewn

You see it every day.

The weak will always give themself over to tyranny for nothing but a grand promise and a soft lie. The different tribes of Marx & Engels will forever be with us, with the grand promise and the soft lie of, if you will give us just one more chance we'll get it right this time...we promise.

No more inequality, no more broken treasuries, no more bodies stacked like cord wood, just grant us the power.

Detestable, sniveling, utopia seeking fucktards.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:14 | 2111301 FubarNation

It is funny because it is true.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:15 | 2111302 tempo

stat of the day from www.tradingeconomics.com (lists debt/gdp, economic growth for world countries)....Mexico's unemployment rate 5%. If true why does the USA have 20 million undocumented workers sitting around collecting entitlements like food stamps, health care, and now student aid with a real 16% underemployment rate in the USA.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:30 | 2111343 GeezerGeek

Maybe we import unemployed Mexicans? And how can they be undocumented "workers" if they're just sitting around collecting freebies?

And are they really "undocumented" if they have fake drivers licenses, fake voter registration cards, SNAP cards, etc.?

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:16 | 2111305 Questan1913

Beam me up Scotty! I can't take anymore of planet Dearthumb.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:20 | 2111313 mendolover

I have a rule of thumb since I woke up in 2009. I never say or let my acquaintances say anything in a phone convo I wouldn't want a federal grand jury to here

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:27 | 2111329 francis_sawyer

...says the man with the police 'arrest' foto avatar...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:30 | 2111342 Alex Kintner

Of course, it depends on your definition of the word 'here'.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:44 | 2111368 A Lunatic

You sound like somebody who has something to hide. A potential "terrorist" even..................

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:08 | 2111428 ebworthen

Hear, but I know what you meant.

I won't beat you for misspellings, but the SS might.

"mendo"? You're either from a Brazillian tribe or in God forsaken Mendocino county, in which case don't worry about what you say; you will be sent to work in the Mexican pot plantations in our national parks regardless.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:26 | 2111328 Alex Kintner

Will Vote For Food. I am cheap and I can be had.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:02 | 2111410 ebworthen

Don't forget potable water, and booze, and tobacco, and...

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 00:17 | 2111846 toomanyfakecons...

I'm sure a certain political party will buy you a hamburger and bus you to the polls. No ID necessary.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:27 | 2111330 Cole Younger

Hmmmm...

http://www.micheleammon.com/onion_diebold.html

Redone...

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:01 | 2111409 ebworthen

There's a hottie; love the aqualine nose and that glint in her eye:

http://www.micheleammon.com/headshot4.html

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 20:59 | 2111403 ebworthen

When humor has as much truth as laugh factor you know you're not in Kansas anymore.

Diebold results are wired to Spain before crossing the Atlantic back to U.S.A.

Reminder: Any computerized voting system deals in binary data, 1's and 0's. At least with hanging chads you had a physical manifestation of reality versus Beelzebub's.

You can't secure a system from the administrator; and in the case of electronic voting there is at least one if not hundreds of administrators.

http://www.blackboxvoting.org/

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:26 | 2111469 Bringin It

Diebold makes bank ATM's. If they did not know how to make secure systems, they would have no bank business. Why would they make their voting machines w/o??

Princeton University Exposes Diebold Flaws

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZws98jw67g

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:17 | 2111445 Atlantis Consigliore

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zdJ8x6lyrfo&feature=related its laughable. suckers

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:17 | 2111447 Atlantis Consigliore

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zdJ8x6lyrfo&feature=related its laughable. suckers

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:28 | 2111476 MrBinkeyWhat

Noooo! Say it is not true. Our "VOTES" really DO count. Yes they do.

/SARC (I really can't pretend any more.)

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:38 | 2111496 Mercury

*Sigh*

Say what you will about constitutional monarchy but at least it's transparent.

Who's the brand manager these days of that form of government?

Tell him to call my office.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:42 | 2111507 MrBinkeyWhat

Wait...This is somehow surprising? The Onion is the ONLY "News" I seem to take seriouser (more seriously) with greater veracitiousness than ZH. WTF! Is there no truthieness more than this?

WTF...I guess I am on my own.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 21:48 | 2111525 EndTheMedia

Here is a simple statistic proving we will have no real change in the 2012 election. http://bit.ly/xgCYiz

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:33 | 2111610 Downtoolong

Funny.

The fact that this same kind of sham is actually real in many securities and commodities markets - not so funny.

Mon, 01/30/2012 - 22:35 | 2111616 monopoly

That was great Tyler. "Might there still be a surprise during the election". NO, lol

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 00:15 | 2111839 toomanyfakecons...

Nice piece. Elections are delivered to TPTB like room service. Dessert anyone?

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 01:58 | 2111978 connda

Classic! +1

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 07:25 | 2112157 Disenchanted

Reasons why electronic election/electoral fraud must be employed in the USA...to the disadvantage of candidates such as Dr. Ron Paul.

From Bill Bonner's Daily Reckoning January 30, 2012:

More on why the US is going to hell...

The country has been at war in two out of three years since 1989. The interesting thing about it is that 1989 marked an historic juncture. It was the year that the US had no more worthy enemies. The Berlin Wall fell that year. The Soviet Union bit the dust. Francis Fukayama said it was maybe the “end of history.” Charles Krauthammer said it was the beginning of a new world, with only one superpower. He called in a “uni-polar world.”

But a country that has been taken over by its military industry cannot permit peace. It must make war — either against its own people or against some other people. Having no suitable enemies, the deficit-fatted pentagon, its rich lobbyists and the nation’s lard- butt patriots had to find some unsuitable ones.

One of our new, old-fashioned conservative friends explained what happened next:

They turned to the Mideast. Why? As enemies, the Arabs/Muslims have several advantages:

There are not many in the continental US; not enough to influence elections or run much of a counter-propaganda campaign

There’s oil in the Mideast; the oil companies contribute a lot of money to campaign coffers. And oil really is a strategic commodity

Americans don’t understand Arabs or Muslims...yahoo Christians don’t trust them. The Jews hate them.

They can’t really do us much harm. We can fight them forever...at huge expense and never win or lose.

It allows us to make common cause with Israel’s right- wingers...and brings in a lot campaign money from Jewish groups. That’s why all the Republican candidates — except Ron Paul — are pro-war.

Regards,

Bill Bonner,
for The Daily Reckoning

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/f/f8/Fiat_justitia_ruat_c...

Tue, 01/31/2012 - 07:46 | 2112176 overmedicatedun...

new zen koan:show me a write in on a diebold touch screen..

Diebold Leaks Election Results Early... Again

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