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Dow Jones Crosses 13,000 22 Times And... Closes Under

Tyler Durden's picture





 

It was quite a day for retirement planners everywhere as the decisions to show up to work or not tomorrow have been on-again, off-again no less than 22 times today as the all-important Dow 13,000 maginot line was criss-crossed frequently only to end on a disappointingly negative note - washing away all those glorious gains in the last 30 seconds.

Of course, in reality, Dow 13000 was crossed considerably more times (thanks to the fractal nature of the quotes) but being conservative 22 times seemed enough.

Charts: Bloomberg

 


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Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:08 | Link to Comment Thomas
Thomas's picture

Kabuki Theater. It will cross many more times and victory will be declared each and every time.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | Link to Comment EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Where are my two minutes of hate?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:19 | Link to Comment TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Joe Wiesenthal slashed his wrists with a swingline stapler and is threatening to jump from the ledge of his first floor window.

Henry Blodget is trying to get a hold of Jon Corzine to talk Wiesenthal down.

 

In the meantime, special needs James Altucher is calling for Dow 20k within year. You can't make this shit up:

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:21 | Link to Comment spiral_eyes
spiral_eyes's picture

lol.

business insider.

lol.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:49 | Link to Comment AbruptlyKawaii
AbruptlyKawaii's picture

 

Dow Jones Crosses 13,000 22 Times And... Closes Under

 

 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAto Eternity.....

 

fuking algos

 

rhetorical question: are sapiens the dumbest species ever ? seriously.

 

stoopid humanz DISPROVE Darwin right?

 

i put this question to the ZH "community" (fuk u cog diss and ur kommunitee)

 

okayyy maybe every theory can have an exception or assumption, but then we're in economics territory.....

 

 

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:03 | Link to Comment FortyTwoIsTheAnswer
FortyTwoIsTheAnswer's picture

Altucher may be right with a Dow 20K prediction. But only because there will so much money printed.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 19:36 | Link to Comment ChrisFromMorningside
ChrisFromMorningside's picture

Exactly. We may well see Dow 20,000 before we see Dow 0.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 19:36 | Link to Comment ChrisFromMorningside
ChrisFromMorningside's picture

20,000? Why so low?

I was listening to a financial "advice" show on Southern California radio that said the DJIA "should" be at 39,000, if it weren't for the unwarranted pessimism of retail investors. Not making this up.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 22:46 | Link to Comment TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Altucher's a piker compared to James Glassman, bitchez.

 

Amazon.com: Dow 36000: The New Strategy for Profiting from the Coming Rise in the Stock Market
  • November 14, 2000
by James K. Glassman and Kevin A. Hassett
"Every stock owner should read this book."
-- Allan H. Meltzer, professor of political economy, Carnegie Mellon University

* A radically new way to determine what stocks are really worth
* Why the Dow is still poised to zoom
* Why the financial establishment is wrong
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* How to build a maximizing portfolio and invest without fear

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-- Arthur M. Louis, San Francisco Chronicle

"Dow 36,000 is a provocative and well-written treatise that cannot be dismissed. . . ."
-- Burton G. Malkiel, Wall Street Journal

"Dow 36,000: Everything you know about stocks is wrong."
-- Jim Jubak, Worth magazine

 

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:16 | Link to Comment HedgeAccordingly
HedgeAccordingly's picture

LOLz. Obama gasoline bubble.. Charted right here.. http://hedge.ly/xkW6Hs

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 23:44 | Link to Comment Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

It sure is kabuki theater, why not dow 15,000 or 20,000.  Everyone knows that this market is juiced on printed money and that a massive correction must be done.  But they can't have that because it would take down alot of banks and this is an election year.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:08 | Link to Comment Tsar Pointless
Tsar Pointless's picture

Catch-22. Get into the market now, and try to catch the wave up to new highs, or stay out and miss out on the rocket-ride.

Decisions, decisions.

I think I'll stay out. I'm not a fan of casinos.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | Link to Comment EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

It's not a casino. Casinos are strictly regulated, and rogue operators put out of business.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:16 | Link to Comment Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

OH!! If it's regulated it must be legit!

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:26 | Link to Comment TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

I'm sticking with Cramer.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:57 | Link to Comment JohnKozac
JohnKozac's picture

I'm sticking with my plumber. He is smarter then any PhD in economics.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 19:54 | Link to Comment nmewn
nmewn's picture

lol...I was trying to keep track of how many times Pisani has wet himself over the last couple days.

Now we know.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:17 | Link to Comment devo
devo's picture

What rocket ride?

Valuations still matter. If they're overbought, you short.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:23 | Link to Comment mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

"Overbought" cannot be defined without admitting to abject speculation.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 21:06 | Link to Comment UP Forester
UP Forester's picture

Come on.

Everyone knows only oil has speculation, and that's evil.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:08 | Link to Comment TradingJoe
TradingJoe's picture

Window Dressing for tourists, that is the DOW!

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | Link to Comment GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

22 x 2 = 66 write in another 6 and you get 666. My point? I have none kinda like this market.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:26 | Link to Comment moonman
moonman's picture

Not real good with the math huh?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:42 | Link to Comment JPM Hater001
JPM Hater001's picture

Since Gene may chose to edit...the original post was:

"22 x 2 = 66 write in another 6 and you get 666. My point? I have none kinda like this market."

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 21:07 | Link to Comment UP Forester
UP Forester's picture

Maths iz fer peepul dat kant spel.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | Link to Comment EvlTheCat
EvlTheCat's picture

Roller coaster porn

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | Link to Comment Waterfallsparkles
Waterfallsparkles's picture

Traders know that stocks are overbought.

Now it is like a Hot Potato.  Although they pump the Stocks up they all want to pass it on to someone else but do not want to hold it themselves.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:18 | Link to Comment devo
devo's picture

Ding ding.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:22 | Link to Comment you enjoy myself
you enjoy myself's picture

yep.  its been a little over 2 months now where virtually every negative opening SPX print has rallied back to at least even or slightly down.  when that music stops nobody knows, but its going to be one hell of a bull trap.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:25 | Link to Comment EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Well, either that, or Bernanke throws in some more liquidity into the markets. It's worked so well in the past, it will surely work forever, right?

 

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:28 | Link to Comment devo
devo's picture

With gas lighting up and people blaming the Fed, I'm not sure that's politically viable. At least not a formal QE program.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:33 | Link to Comment EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Oh don't worry about that.

Soon we'll have the elected teleprompters start repeating the perpetual scapegoat talking points; blaming the evil speculator, again. In fact, Pelosi already did last Friday.

Of course, that they'll never ask who gave these evil speculators all the liquidity to drive up prices is NOT IMPORTANT.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:37 | Link to Comment devo
devo's picture

Good point, I did catch her doing that.

Maybe there is some truth to it, though, because the Fed has pumped a lot of money into the system since last year, yet gas is at about the same price. It almost suggests gas is cheaper this year @ $4 vs last year @$4. i.e. a debassed currency buys equal gas? Seems odd. I guess someone is debassing their currency even more or it really is speculation (because we know supply/demand don't drive markets anymore).

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:25 | Link to Comment TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Nancy Pelosi said that gas station operators (most of whom are franchisees & don't even set the price of the fuel they sell; the franchisor does that - but I digress) are racists who are raising the price of gas to help the party of fat cats and Wall Street and banks (her husband is as intimately tied to all three categories as anyone in history) unseat Obama this November.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:26 | Link to Comment mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

Traders know that stocks are overbought.

 

But buy-and-hold investors aren't on the margin here, so isn't the notion of "overbought" just a game of chicken between traders (and their alter-ego algos)?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:35 | Link to Comment Waterfallsparkles
Waterfallsparkles's picture

Not when the RSI gets over 90.  There are chartists and they will sell.  Never fails when the RSI gets to high they usually have a sharp pull back.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:36 | Link to Comment mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

Using "never" and "usually" in the same argument supports my point.  Thx, kitty.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 22:26 | Link to Comment iraskin
iraskin's picture

Where can you get the report on it?  I know it typically comes from NYSE...

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:10 | Link to Comment Dow 36000
Dow 36000's picture

This means stocks are going up....right?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:28 | Link to Comment mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

That's what CNBC says...that's what CNBC says...that's what CNBC says...that's what

(skipping narrative CD)

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:06 | Link to Comment John Wilmot
John Wilmot's picture

Bye Bye Bye!

...now I'm off to sell my Lehman shares, they're up right?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:11 | Link to Comment Ese Pinche
Ese Pinche's picture

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH... fuckin funny

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:11 | Link to Comment PaperBear
PaperBear's picture

While silver bounces up from $35/oz and down from $36/oz.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:52 | Link to Comment mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

Up and down

and in the end it's only round and round...and round

(Waters)

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:12 | Link to Comment surf0766
surf0766's picture

But $14.00 gas isn't bad for our growing economy !. B-cup green shoots !!!

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:13 | Link to Comment Irish66
Irish66's picture

I like the vix into the close

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:17 | Link to Comment LouisDega
LouisDega's picture

William Shatner : What the fuck you talkin' about?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:14 | Link to Comment Wolferl
Wolferl's picture

Can´t you see the famous Swiss mountain formation, stupid? It means everything will go up forever. Durden is wrong with his doom and gloom. Lol.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:15 | Link to Comment Bold Eagle
Bold Eagle's picture

Have to keep public in suspense, that's rule #1 for a soap opera. The next episode is at 9:30 am tomorrow.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:15 | Link to Comment realtick
realtick's picture

How come no one is talking about Morgan Stanley? That stock is falling apart.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:16 | Link to Comment Kristian
Kristian's picture

The cynical remarks of Zerohedge on the efforts of the powers in charge that do their utmost best to deliver us the wealth effect, just make this website so lovable.

 

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:43 | Link to Comment TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

The wealth affect is antiquated, and has been retired, and The Bernank replaced it with 'virtuous circle'

It's sort of like the 9  circles in Dante's Inferno.

Interview with Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke - 60 Minutes (virtuous circle jerk)

 

http://lh6.ggpht.com/-rJ6zOzQfKrc/Tz4nRHLPsuI/AAAAAAAAJQU/9JJVE_At0XA/im...

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:07 | Link to Comment EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Well, let's see. The "wealth effect" didn't work, and neither did "trickle down economics". What's next? Us just handing the top 0.01% our money?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:16 | Link to Comment adr
adr's picture

The Dow better get cranking. It has to cross 14k by the end of march to keep with the pattern. Anything else will be considered failure. It has to hit 15k by April 15th, 16k by May 1st, 17k by May 7th. And then start 1k days, hours, minutes, and seconds. By July the Dow will be at 1 million. Everyone will be trillionaires, but gasoline will be 5 trillion per gallon. The 1%ers will be what? Septillionaires? I can't remember what comes after quintillion. 

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:30 | Link to Comment Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

James Altucher says the Dow is going to 20,000 by the end of the year. However he neglected to say that if it does we will be paying $20.00 for a loaf of bread.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:29 | Link to Comment Debt-Is-Not-Money
Debt-Is-Not-Money's picture

"James Altucher says the Dow is going to 20,000 by the end of the year."

Did he say which year?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:17 | Link to Comment Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

I wore a bald spot in my head putting on and taking off my dow 13,000 cap.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:18 | Link to Comment Herman_the_German
Herman_the_German's picture

PPT in full force !!

After european markets went down they came in with a vengeance with the US opening. Ramping up to Fridays levels and then - flatliners. What a farce of a market.

But they had to keep the FDAX above the critical chartlevel of 6840.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:21 | Link to Comment taniquetil
taniquetil's picture

I may not be nearly as sophisticated as some of the people who read and comment on ZeroHedge, but I've loaded up my inverse ETFs.

 

Crash away.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:32 | Link to Comment mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

So you've got yer whole stack-o-chips on 00?  Should be good test of stamina.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:30 | Link to Comment RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture

Gerald Celente, Greg Weldon, Greg Hunter, Nigel Farage, etc. must all be having a stroke.

http://www.wallstreetbear.com/board/view.php?topic=95468&post=346944

And PCLN is up $24 after hours, sheesh!!!

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:35 | Link to Comment mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

Recovered so quickly from your February bloodpuke-fest, Robo?  We thought a tickle of the 13k might get you crawling out from some manhole (pun intended) somewhere.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:15 | Link to Comment EvlTheCat
EvlTheCat's picture

What?  ZH revoked your privilege to post chart porn, so now you're pimping your posts at a different site??

LOL

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:20 | Link to Comment Iwanttoknow
Iwanttoknow's picture

Welcome back,ZH is never the same W/O you.

Tue, 02/28/2012 - 00:58 | Link to Comment LouisDega
LouisDega's picture

I just gave you a green arrow Robo

                  With love, William Shatner

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:41 | Link to Comment the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

It is like trying to break the warp barrier, we just can't do it the engines can't take the strain!!!

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:43 | Link to Comment lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

Bullitshez!

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:48 | Link to Comment monopoly
monopoly's picture

Oh good. Robot is back. 

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:48 | Link to Comment gimli
gimli's picture

I really felt that the 23rd time would have been the charm --- let's go for the Guinness record tomorrow ......... on 2nd thought, I'll just go for a few Guinness's instead

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:50 | Link to Comment G Mann
G Mann's picture

You guys have any luck Twitter-fucking Black Box One? (Goldman)

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:52 | Link to Comment blu
blu's picture

In and out 22 times.

Some people act just like animals, really.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:10 | Link to Comment navy62802
navy62802's picture

If you have your retirement tied up in this market you are both dumb and fucked.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:16 | Link to Comment third world
third world's picture

I am curios ... Who is buying this rally??? the hedge funds are again behind the curve as usual; the data show just outflows form retail (i kwon it change a lit bit recently, but not enought to justify the rally); buybacks??? it sounds strange (january/february, i don't tinhk so) ... So the props??? problably ... props and the no short strategies anymore??? maybe ... i don't kwon ...  

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 21:29 | Link to Comment chump666
chump666's picture

Scary.  Rangy trading of top and it cannot hold 13000...we got the LTRO coming up and it's already priced in as a potential risk averse event.  PIIGS yields should start to blow out again on oil inflation and euro zone debt being dog sh*t, no one wants it. Better off with IBM bonds.  Sovereigns are going to get punished and the ECB can't do anything about it.

LOL they blew the oil price out is precisely why the bond market will start to look worst for ware.

Correction (stocks) about to rev up into a panic sell.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 22:13 | Link to Comment iraskin
iraskin's picture

chump, where are you coming up with this bullshit from? Do you have some method to derive your view?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 23:53 | Link to Comment chump666
chump666's picture

huh?  Well discussing it with the braindead isn't one of them.

:)

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