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Dow Jones Crosses 13,000 22 Times And... Closes Under

Tyler Durden's picture




 

It was quite a day for retirement planners everywhere as the decisions to show up to work or not tomorrow have been on-again, off-again no less than 22 times today as the all-important Dow 13,000 maginot line was criss-crossed frequently only to end on a disappointingly negative note - washing away all those glorious gains in the last 30 seconds.

Of course, in reality, Dow 13000 was crossed considerably more times (thanks to the fractal nature of the quotes) but being conservative 22 times seemed enough.

Charts: Bloomberg

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Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:08 | 2201622 Thomas
Thomas's picture

Kabuki Theater. It will cross many more times and victory will be declared each and every time.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | 2201635 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Where are my two minutes of hate?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:19 | 2201650 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Joe Wiesenthal slashed his wrists with a swingline stapler and is threatening to jump from the ledge of his first floor window.

Henry Blodget is trying to get a hold of Jon Corzine to talk Wiesenthal down.

 

In the meantime, special needs James Altucher is calling for Dow 20k within year. You can't make this shit up:

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:21 | 2201683 spiral_eyes
spiral_eyes's picture

lol.

business insider.

lol.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:49 | 2201805 AbruptlyKawaii
AbruptlyKawaii's picture

 

Dow Jones Crosses 13,000 22 Times And... Closes Under

 

 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAto Eternity.....

 

fuking algos

 

rhetorical question: are sapiens the dumbest species ever ? seriously.

 

stoopid humanz DISPROVE Darwin right?

 

i put this question to the ZH "community" (fuk u cog diss and ur kommunitee)

 

okayyy maybe every theory can have an exception or assumption, but then we're in economics territory.....

 

 

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:03 | 2201872 FortyTwoIsTheAnswer
FortyTwoIsTheAnswer's picture

Altucher may be right with a Dow 20K prediction. But only because there will so much money printed.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 19:36 | 2202093 ChrisFromMorningside
ChrisFromMorningside's picture

Exactly. We may well see Dow 20,000 before we see Dow 0.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 19:36 | 2202089 ChrisFromMorningside
ChrisFromMorningside's picture

20,000? Why so low?

I was listening to a financial "advice" show on Southern California radio that said the DJIA "should" be at 39,000, if it weren't for the unwarranted pessimism of retail investors. Not making this up.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 22:46 | 2202480 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Altucher's a piker compared to James Glassman, bitchez.

 

Amazon.com: Dow 36000: The New Strategy for Profiting from the Coming Rise in the Stock Market
  • November 14, 2000
by James K. Glassman and Kevin A. Hassett
"Every stock owner should read this book."
-- Allan H. Meltzer, professor of political economy, Carnegie Mellon University

* A radically new way to determine what stocks are really worth
* Why the Dow is still poised to zoom
* Why the financial establishment is wrong
* Why stocks are actually less risky than bonds
* How to build a maximizing portfolio and invest without fear

"One of the hottest business books around. . . . It has wonderfully clear explanations of financial theory [and] excellent advice on general investing approaches."
-- Allan Sloan, Newsweek

"It may sound like headline-grabbing sensationalism, but the scholarly and punctilious authors make a persuasive case . . . the book is highly readable and witty."
-- Arthur M. Louis, San Francisco Chronicle

"Dow 36,000 is a provocative and well-written treatise that cannot be dismissed. . . ."
-- Burton G. Malkiel, Wall Street Journal

"Dow 36,000: Everything you know about stocks is wrong."
-- Jim Jubak, Worth magazine

 

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:16 | 2201666 HedgeAccordingly
HedgeAccordingly's picture

LOLz. Obama gasoline bubble.. Charted right here.. http://hedge.ly/xkW6Hs

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 23:44 | 2202602 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

It sure is kabuki theater, why not dow 15,000 or 20,000.  Everyone knows that this market is juiced on printed money and that a massive correction must be done.  But they can't have that because it would take down alot of banks and this is an election year.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:08 | 2201627 Tsar Pointless
Tsar Pointless's picture

Catch-22. Get into the market now, and try to catch the wave up to new highs, or stay out and miss out on the rocket-ride.

Decisions, decisions.

I think I'll stay out. I'm not a fan of casinos.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | 2201640 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

It's not a casino. Casinos are strictly regulated, and rogue operators put out of business.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:16 | 2201663 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

OH!! If it's regulated it must be legit!

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:26 | 2201705 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

I'm sticking with Cramer.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:57 | 2201856 JohnKozac
JohnKozac's picture

I'm sticking with my plumber. He is smarter then any PhD in economics.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 19:54 | 2202124 nmewn
nmewn's picture

lol...I was trying to keep track of how many times Pisani has wet himself over the last couple days.

Now we know.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:17 | 2201669 devo
devo's picture

What rocket ride?

Valuations still matter. If they're overbought, you short.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:23 | 2201697 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

"Overbought" cannot be defined without admitting to abject speculation.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 21:06 | 2202289 UP Forester
UP Forester's picture

Come on.

Everyone knows only oil has speculation, and that's evil.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:08 | 2201628 TradingJoe
TradingJoe's picture

Window Dressing for tourists, that is the DOW!

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | 2201632 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

22 x 2 = 66 write in another 6 and you get 666. My point? I have none kinda like this market.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:26 | 2201706 moonman
moonman's picture

Not real good with the math huh?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:42 | 2201779 JPM Hater001
JPM Hater001's picture

Since Gene may chose to edit...the original post was:

"22 x 2 = 66 write in another 6 and you get 666. My point? I have none kinda like this market."

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 21:07 | 2202294 UP Forester
UP Forester's picture

Maths iz fer peepul dat kant spel.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | 2201634 EvlTheCat
EvlTheCat's picture

Roller coaster porn

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:09 | 2201636 Waterfallsparkles
Waterfallsparkles's picture

Traders know that stocks are overbought.

Now it is like a Hot Potato.  Although they pump the Stocks up they all want to pass it on to someone else but do not want to hold it themselves.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:18 | 2201676 devo
devo's picture

Ding ding.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:22 | 2201689 you enjoy myself
you enjoy myself's picture

yep.  its been a little over 2 months now where virtually every negative opening SPX print has rallied back to at least even or slightly down.  when that music stops nobody knows, but its going to be one hell of a bull trap.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:25 | 2201704 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Well, either that, or Bernanke throws in some more liquidity into the markets. It's worked so well in the past, it will surely work forever, right?

 

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:28 | 2201710 devo
devo's picture

With gas lighting up and people blaming the Fed, I'm not sure that's politically viable. At least not a formal QE program.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:33 | 2201719 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Oh don't worry about that.

Soon we'll have the elected teleprompters start repeating the perpetual scapegoat talking points; blaming the evil speculator, again. In fact, Pelosi already did last Friday.

Of course, that they'll never ask who gave these evil speculators all the liquidity to drive up prices is NOT IMPORTANT.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:37 | 2201737 devo
devo's picture

Good point, I did catch her doing that.

Maybe there is some truth to it, though, because the Fed has pumped a lot of money into the system since last year, yet gas is at about the same price. It almost suggests gas is cheaper this year @ $4 vs last year @$4. i.e. a debassed currency buys equal gas? Seems odd. I guess someone is debassing their currency even more or it really is speculation (because we know supply/demand don't drive markets anymore).

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:25 | 2201941 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Nancy Pelosi said that gas station operators (most of whom are franchisees & don't even set the price of the fuel they sell; the franchisor does that - but I digress) are racists who are raising the price of gas to help the party of fat cats and Wall Street and banks (her husband is as intimately tied to all three categories as anyone in history) unseat Obama this November.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:26 | 2201703 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

Traders know that stocks are overbought.

 

But buy-and-hold investors aren't on the margin here, so isn't the notion of "overbought" just a game of chicken between traders (and their alter-ego algos)?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:35 | 2201734 Waterfallsparkles
Waterfallsparkles's picture

Not when the RSI gets over 90.  There are chartists and they will sell.  Never fails when the RSI gets to high they usually have a sharp pull back.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:36 | 2201743 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

Using "never" and "usually" in the same argument supports my point.  Thx, kitty.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 22:26 | 2202449 iraskin
iraskin's picture

Where can you get the report on it?  I know it typically comes from NYSE...

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:10 | 2201643 Dow 36000
Dow 36000's picture

This means stocks are going up....right?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:28 | 2201709 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

That's what CNBC says...that's what CNBC says...that's what CNBC says...that's what

(skipping narrative CD)

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 18:06 | 2201885 John Wilmot
John Wilmot's picture

Bye Bye Bye!

...now I'm off to sell my Lehman shares, they're up right?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:11 | 2201644 Ese Pinche
Ese Pinche's picture

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH... fuckin funny

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:11 | 2201646 PaperBear
PaperBear's picture

While silver bounces up from $35/oz and down from $36/oz.

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:52 | 2201830 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture

 

 

Up and down

and in the end it's only round and round...and round

(Waters)

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:12 | 2201647 surf0766
surf0766's picture

But $14.00 gas isn't bad for our growing economy !. B-cup green shoots !!!

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:13 | 2201648 Irish66
Irish66's picture

I like the vix into the close

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:17 | 2201649 LouisDega
LouisDega's picture

William Shatner : What the fuck you talkin' about?

Mon, 02/27/2012 - 17:14 | 2201656 Wolferl
Wolferl's picture

Can´t you see the famous Swiss mountain formation, stupid? It means everything will go up forever. Durden is wrong with his doom and gloom. Lol.

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