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ECB Eases Collateral Requirements

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Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:40 | 1692015 speconomist
speconomist's picture

Misread headline as Collateral Requiem.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:45 | 1692032 TruthHunter
TruthHunter's picture

Misread headline as Collateral Requiem.

Are we trying too hard to read between the lines?  

I misread illiquid as illicit.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:43 | 1692022 Apostle of Unknown
Apostle of Unknown's picture

Finally, a chance to swap my pog collection

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:43 | 1692024 Fips_OnTheSpot
Fips_OnTheSpot's picture

It's scripted! Hollywood couldnt do better.



Oh wait -- I forgot:


Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:44 | 1692026 qussl3
qussl3's picture

Making it rain euro style.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:45 | 1692029 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

What's next? Free houses for Gypsies? They won't take 'em those wise nomads.

Fuck Trichet.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 10:40 | 1692307 falak pema
falak pema's picture

no point fukking one nutter and not the other bigger nut : Bernanke, the king fiat printer.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:46 | 1692031 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

The ECB has agreed to pick up 147 rusting, old power transformers I've been storing for a rainy day.

They're chock full of PCBs.

Trichet will be here to pick them up tomorrow at 8 a.m., and I'll get 84 million EUR for my 'collateral.'

It really surprised me because The Bernank had been not returning my phone calls or emails on a request for a Fed loan.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 11:06 | 1692426 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

First, you need to swap them for a debt instrument.

I've got some grade AAAAA++WOULDBUYAGAIN Lehman Bros 10-year debt issues, which I picked up for pennies on par, post-bankruptcy. Great to know I can finally cash in.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:46 | 1692033 Quintus
Quintus's picture

Could Trichet not have found a more explicit way of announcing the ECB's desperation and panic?  

Seriously, there may possibly be someone out there who does not recognise this as the "Oh my God we're all going to crash and burn!!!" signal it clearly is.


Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:46 | 1692036 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Doesn't the benchmark have to be Defaulted bonds as collateral like bernanke accepted in 2008 http://www.zerohedge.com/article/how-fed-gave-goldman-millions-exchange-defauted-bond-collateral ?

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 11:52 | 1692642 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

I think you first have to ask "what is a reserve currency" before you answer that. Indeed a central bank can take "defaulted on" paper. But it can also drive down interest rates to zero and literally "flatten" all banks so called "risk free" returns. This is to be respected precisely because "he don't get paid shit" like "all us big-wigs" (and of course big-wig wannabes). The fact is governments throughout the West were attacked in 2008 and only now as the dust has settled have these governments discovered a: who did it and more importantly b: they will not stop unless and until governments stop them. Needless to say "there's an infinite number of tools in that toolbox."

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:49 | 1692044 Peter K
Peter K's picture


Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:49 | 1692051 Curtis LeMay
Curtis LeMay's picture

At this point the ECB would probably cash an I.O.U. from Charles Manson...

This is pathetic. Why not just start the printing presses and give the monopoly money away first come first serve?? 

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:57 | 1692085 schadenfreude
schadenfreude's picture

DSK's sperm is admitted as well.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:51 | 1692058 Fips_OnTheSpot
Fips_OnTheSpot's picture

I had "2008" on the phone - it wants the money back! Collateral damage, bitchez!

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:53 | 1692063 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

A 5 billion Euro ECB loan using 20 goats as collateral. What's not to love about that?

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:56 | 1692083 Vincent Vega
Vincent Vega's picture

Should read: ECB Removes All Collateral Requirements. 

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 09:59 | 1692100 youngman
youngman's picture

I wonder if they have any used Bunga Bunga party panties they could trade in...they have to be worth quite a lot...

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 10:01 | 1692104 Alvaro de Esteban
Alvaro de Esteban's picture

A slightly stained Baby wipe will be enough...


Wed, 09/21/2011 - 10:04 | 1692119 Nothing To See Here
Nothing To See Here's picture

I got plenty of ink and paper which I would be glad to give as collateral on my mortgage to my bank. Might work in a future near you.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 10:09 | 1692144 gball
gball's picture

Brilliant.  Just brilliant.

Those pesky collateral requirements have been the problem all along.

Everything's fixed now.  The solution to rising leverage due to deposit withdrawls is to allow more leverage to inspire confidence.  This will surely encourage business and consumers to put their deposits back in banks. 

Shoot...I'm opening a BNP checking account right now, cashing all my gold and silver in, and going to put it in their no interest checking account I'm so inspired.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 10:09 | 1692147 unununium
unununium's picture

Finally, CDS can be offloaded to the central bank.

Unregulated market.

Then things go boom, and central bank makes all the payouts.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 10:15 | 1692175 Calculo Ergo Sum
Calculo Ergo Sum's picture

This is a bazooka exploding in the hands of the shooter.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 10:17 | 1692186 Calculo Ergo Sum
Calculo Ergo Sum's picture

This is a bazooka exploding in the hands of the shooter.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 10:17 | 1692189 oogs66
oogs66's picture

bring out your dead

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 10:49 | 1692355 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

This is ridiculous.

Next, they'll let banks give stars and planets they say they own in other galaxies as collateral.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 11:25 | 1692484 Miles Kendig
Miles Kendig's picture

Somewhat interestingly they dropped the requirement that the collateral be 'traded on a regulated market' - does that mean they will accept defaulted GGBs?

Tyler, looks like the ECB may be following in Japanese example and will accept the personal IOU's of leading figures, backed by their personal holdings .. and perhaps the off the books transactions within emerging nations.  Classic tell tale beyond D paper that appears especially noteworthy in the case of France with possible spillover to Austria, Spain and Italy.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 12:33 | 1692848 Coldfire
Coldfire's picture

Jean-Claude Dechet, the Gallic Garbagemonger.

Wed, 09/21/2011 - 16:10 | 1694222 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

ECB takes even Ruby's hot panties as collateral.

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