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Eurogroup Press Conference In Progress
Update 3: Conference begins now
Update 2: At this point the conference, if at all, will be held at 3:30 am CET. Probably would be better to just scrap it all, put a fork in Greece and go home. The second the 10 page Greek "sustainability" report hits the public it's lights out.
Update: 23:00 CET has come and gone. Next stop: midnight. As a reminder, the October 2011 official second Greek bailout announcement was delayed until 4 am.
According to a just released update on the website of the European Council, the much anticipated press conference "to end all press conferences" will take place at 23:00 CET, or 5 pm Eastern. What will then likely happen is another delay until midnight, then later, then finally when Europe is sleeping a few finance ministers will say that the Deal is virtually done, the terms of the PSI are agreed upon (except that "some" creditors, those who have a blocking stake, will vote no and force the use of CACs and thus trigger a default before March 20) with the exception of a few minor outstanding items, such as whose debt is cut to bring total Debt/GDP to 120% by 2020, which they hope to get resolved shortly. And so this latest and greatest meeting will come and go, and anyone who shorted the Belgian caterers will be broke when the market opens up tomorrow, when Belgian catering ETFs all go limit up.
Watch it live, or dead, or zombie, or however the mood suits, at the following webcast.
And the full statement:
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Front row seats still available..BYOB
The shuffling of the deck continues.
Only difference here is that extra cards in this deck can be printed at will, with the rules of the game changing as the game is played. Only in Olympia!
The suspense is killing me!!!!!!!!
/sarc/
*Long Belgian catering industry
The EU, EZ, ECB and IOC may be about to announce, with the FinMin group, that the Summer Olympics will be held in Greece, not London, this summer. The Germans will supply security, the Belgians will cater meals, and the UK will set up cheap housing ala the Costa del Sol.
Most sporting events will be as expected except the marathon. This year, the marathon will be held on the Pelaponnese and run through Marathon. The competitors in this event will be TBTF bankers, hedge funds, and issuers of sovereign debt - sometimes Treasury type officials, sometimes legislators that just keep deficit spending. It is expected to take months before a medal is awarded.
Photograph from the Daily Telegraph of a certain IMF person and a Greek person..
http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02145/lagarde_2145042c.jpg
she looks like darth mall's mom.
Looks like Darth Vador's mom
Tyler, stick a fork in it? Can't we keep pretending there will be a bailout soon? C'mon! DJ 14k! What about DJ 14k?!
Thank god they were respectful enough to wait until Presidents Day was concluded here in the US, because that is the super nice respectful thing to do.
Next up Mardi Gras, followed by Ash Wednesday, so maybe they should just wait until Thursday at this point.
Shamrock Shakes back in the house too! Yippie Ky Ay Motherfuckers - Just the way St. Patrick would have wanted it.
And I thought the O J Simpson trial was a sideshow. They are just distracting our attention away from Ben's ponzi, which is at least a hundred million times bigger than any euro ponzi could ever hope to be. The euro is a non-event
And while we're waiting, in other news, one of the Kenyan National Ski Team's long-time and best boosters takes to the slopes.
After a challenging run down the double black diamond face wall she was heard to have exclaimed "It's so nice to take a break from all the grueling official state vacations to participate in one of my people’s ancient pastimes!”. Afterwards she joined her royal entourage for a traditional après-ski mug of hot coconut grog followed by a sit down roast antelope dinner.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2103173/Just-weeks-17-day-Hawaii-holiday-Michelle-Obama-takes-daughters-ski-trip-Aspen.html
Greenwich has been replaced with Rip Van Winkle.
Winkle Mean Time.
I'm watching the newscast.... All I have to say is that Central Planners are the scum of the earth!
IT. WILL. NEVER. ENNNNNNNNNNNNDDD!!!!
It started! Finally....wait, second to last question????? This is going to end quicker than an Obama speech!
legard said she will take it to imf bord and have a decision by the 2nd week of march that is if greece takes care of its end by end of february...........it will never end
Last question...how many questions were there? Three?
lmao! u got it!
EFS?! What the fuck is that? The next acility? How many of these facilities are there? Europe is giving QE a run for its $$!
lol wtf, i never herd of esf, it aint gonna end man......its not gonna end man....nerver gonna end...
They don't want too many questions to be asked... just "TRUST US" we've got it under control. .... now... it's time for bed.... and that Finnish guy (Ollie) needs to learn how to speak without saying "Uhhh... uhhh..." all uhh.... the... uhhh... time... uhhh....
very freking annoying!!!
Whew!
I'm glad it's all resolved now.
Yikes!
That was a close call.
We march to March 20th. The sound of ineviatbility.
It needs a theme song....
Uhhh... yes... uhh... it... uhhh... is... uhh... isn't... uhhh... it... uhhh....
I wonder if they transcribe that into the official minutes.... I hope... uhh... so... uhhh...
So a phone call between him and Bernanke would be:
"Uhhh....uh...uh....."
"Uhhh.....uhhh....uh....."
"Uh....uh....uh....uh...."
"Uhhh....uh....uh.....uhhhh....."
Uhhh....uhhhhh....
huh huh,
hey Beavis, pull my finger.
none of them believe a word of any of this and they know it!
nice cut off ending, what a farce. that was like the time i gave cash to a hooker only she just danced and left...
Did you like that "enjoy your breakast" line? Wink wink......
Deja vu?
On 9/6/11, at the conclusion of a U.S. 3-day weekend, the SNB announced a euro peg for the swissie, effectively devaluing by 10%. Though this was extremely gold-positive, gold was smashed in the minutes before the announcement. The raid continued thru Tuesday, the 7th and gold finished down almost $50.
Fast forward to tonight. The end of a 3-day weekend. Some gold positive news out of Europe. An overnight beatdown coming? Watch the price action at the 3:00 am EST LBMA open and be prepared for anything.
This is the most insane shit I have ever heard. Greece must implement austerity, or else the loans will not be secured.
It's like kicking a man while he's down and telling him to get up.
ESM/ESF/BDSM......IMF/ECB/BB....
Turd, I'll be buying everyday next week...and the next. I'm looking to unload cash at $1680. Hopeully it happens sooner than later.
Bring it, bitchez!
indeed. This is what the turds all looked like during the flush:
http://flic.kr/p/bm3HdM
Das racist http://www.myspace.com/dasracist
Not a babe you would want to meet in a dark alley...
"Do I make you horney?"
That is one unhappy fella.
They keep delaying this. How can they be so cruel?
That's like delaying the Superbowl....or the World Cup....or Jon Corzine delaying answering how he made 1.6 billion disappear.
John Corzine: I Did Not, Have, Sexual, Relations, with THAT Woman, M.F. Global
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSDAXGXGiEw
lol
"delaying" reality is the new normal.
TWEET FROM DJ FX TRADER: "Greece's official creditors have asked private bondholders to write down at least 53% of the face value of their holdings"
Reuters Breaking 5 Minutes Ago:
"Euro zone reaches deal on second Greek bailout package"
I assume this means IF the Private hoilders agree to get screwed, and not trigger a credit event.
Kicking the can on meeting to plan for...kicking the can.
Read this stuff: http://www.spiegel.de/international/europe/0,1518,816498,00.html
the conclusion to that article is still " we have the answer and it is more debt just not for the greeks" .
+1 for the Euro Viagra.
Based on what Christine Lagarde said (overnight they managed to reduce Greece's debt to GDP ratio from 129% to 120%), I think they have the accountants huffing chloroform and eating roofies.
In Greece that's going to be known as the Everlasting Jobstopper
Make erections, not elections!
Bring your own bank lol
Noz
Bernanke thought it meant Buy Your Own Bonds.
Bring your own bitches, Bitchez !
I gatta have more nascar and football.....
...and cowbell
Update 4: Enjoy your breakfast...Bitchez!
Speaking of The Bernank, here's some of his brilliant forecasting as he speaks with Steve LIESman & Maria 'Woo She Got A Big Ass' Bartiromo while everyone anxiously awaits this incredible EU moment in time:
A Short Video Which Proves Why The Bernank Gets The Captain's ChairBring your own BARF
Germany would then be in isolation and the blame game would start and anger among European nations would rise. Who knows. Armada fx traders are talking about Germany leaving the eurozone shortly.
Greece defaulting and leaving the EU would send the Euro to $2.50.
Germany leaving the EU would send the Euro to $0.01.
Wrong.
Both scenarios are euro negative.
Will AAPL rally tomorrow? I am looking for undervalued, fairly priced and promising equities.
AAPL may have to dig into its $100B cash stockpile to continue doing business in China.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/20/proview-apple-ipad_n_1288607.html
Bullish, I say!!!
Phew
Why does AAPL just buy Greece?
Millions of workers... nice food, nice weather... good shipping infrastructure...
Could be a winner...
can greek people work 18 hours a day with sub-minimum wages?
We can have all the fucking stupid retard cops threaten them all with batons and pepper spray. That would be ideal, we could get the useless Idevice produced for less than three cents per unit. AAPL stock to $5000 and we'll all be millionaires... Sarc...
can greek people work 18 hours a day with sub-minimum wages?
@21, have been looking at stock prices for only the last few years of my life. IMO... Forget about MICRO fundamentals. Bet on a company, product, invesment, asset, commodity, stock... based upon a macro economic thesis that the whole economic/geopolitic system will implode soon... there is NO 100% safe haven investment... I however think the inflation trade will be on for sometime, thus I think AAPL will benefit from all future rounds of QE and other forms of stimuls. Physical GOLD and other hard assets also benefit in expansionary liquidity enviornments. I have gotten physical gold over the past several years as gifts and plan to hold for sometime.
bring your own bonds lol
I HAVE TO PULL ANOTHER ALL NIGHTER TO LISTEN TO THE ELF VON ROMPUY AGAIN AT 4 AM? FUCK THAT.
LOL at the well worded depiction.
thanks Tyler.
..this is alll just bullish Silver.........
biches
If you can only add numbers in the trillion range, you might be a central bankster.
If you've spent the last several months on an 'imminent solution', you might be a central bankster.
If your calculator is two feet wide......you might be a central bankster.
if you just mortgaged the future of 300 million people to buy yourself one month....you might be a central bankster
They keep delaying because whatever deal they are making will be nasty and not sufficient.
Wait... whats the show about..
And how much Popcorn would we need...
BYOB = beg your own bailout
There was no one from the government of Greece sitting at ANY of them!
What kind of ''agreement' is this when the party who must agree to the deal is not even in the room!
Jumped the Shark already.
dont you love the illuminati eye symbol on the waiting screen?
It seems more like an illuminati pussy to me.
seems more like part of the Walmart happy face
Speaking of illuminati pussie...
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2103755/Monacos-Prince-Pierre-Casiraghi-hospital-vicious-brawl-Manhattan-nightclub.html
What I would give to see the "men" in the article dropped off in Syntagma Square with a "Thank You For Bailing Out My Trust Fund" tattoed on there asses.
Do you suppose he bones the dog?
Only if the dog is a male.
Knick-knack, patti whack, give a dog a bone...
He must be Prince Charming.
Alternate caption...
Pepe the dog made the best of a bad situation by dressing his giant constipated turd in striped shirt and floral pants...
Stop it you two, its almost dinner time...
They neutered the wrong one, me thinks.
>>>Do you suppose he bones the dog?
other way around.
I thought the football carry was for convenience of placement.
Notice the shell shocked look of constant surprise on the dog's face, the alert ears. He could get it any minute now.
But I see your point, it could reflect, as hedgeless suggests, his pussie status to the dog.
I learn so much on this website.
Why have all banking cabal men (and apparently their offspring) become such pussies under TBTF and bailouts? Answer the question, "What kind of man is he that never loses?"
HH - Thanks for the link to the delicious Daily Mail article, one moral of which is "Don't mess with the old guys".
the banker god is androgynous, the minions come to reflect the master...
This kind. I did my own investigation of the situation and found these. Keep scrolling down:
http://www.popnografia.com/2009/07/pierre-casiraghi-desnudo-tias.html
He looks like a "catcher".
WHAT you expect them to do? Join communist party? We created that world!
Good for them that at least they fuck, and celebrate bestiality. Too many wimps do not get the wang out and do it anymore. Too much virtual sex (porno) in this world. I want to be fiucked in reality. Anyone wanna hang on my tits here?
His name was Robert Paulson.
Narrator: [V.O] This is Bob. Bob had bitch tits.
Narrator: [V.O]This was a support group for men with testicular cancer. The big moosie slobbering all over me… that was Bob.
Robert ‘Bob’ Paulson: We’re still men.
Narrator: Yes, we’re men. Men is what we are.
Narrator: [V.O] Eight months ago, Bob’s testicles were removed. Then hormone therapy. He developed bitch tits because his testosterone was too high and his body upped the estrogen. And that was where I fit…
Robert ‘Bob’ Paulson: They’re gonna have to open my pecs again to drain the fluid.
Narrator: [V.O] Between those huge sweating tits that hung enormous, the way you’d think of God’s as big.
Good for them they do not know what a trust fund is, otherwise they would tell their mommies: <<Why don't you trust me?>>
/trolololling 'till 23,00
Poor college drop-out. Cocaine bravery may get him killed.
Hope springs eternal.
That one is on the dollar, isn't it? ;-)
A massive Japs eye, scary.
nope, just the banker god. that is all.
long popcorn
Short excitement
..this is going to be a Wafflefest.. excruciating diplomatic double-speak tedium
They will announce a super duper deal and the dow will surge!
GREAT intro/set-up, Tyler. You still da Man. Yeah, just a few little insignificant, niggling details to hash out before they can ink a deal, huh? Go caterers.......
They will announce a super duper deal and the dow will surge!
They will announce a super duper deal and the dow will surge!
you are suffering from the ZH post yips, go and fix yourself a strong drink.
Even if you are not suffering, fix yourself a strong drink. I will in just a couple hours.
Does straight bourbon count as strong? I have to celebrate early for tomorrow's DJ 13k explosion! Explosion!!!!! Did I say EXPLOSION!!!
Explooooohhhh-sion!!!!!
Dow is sittin on go right now!
WHO? Dow Jones....
Who? Dow Jones....
Who? Dow Jones....
Phyzzz To The Moooooonnnnnn and Beyond :)))))
Das Reich shall last 1,000 years!!! or much shorter...
..sell the news..
I've been thinking that for quite some time. Trouble is the sell never seems to follow the news.
"Trouble is the sell never seems to follow the news."
Be sure to thank the PPT for that. What's a few billion more tax dollars propping up the markets, compared to the glorious reelection of THE ONE!, THE! ONE!, the Holy Messiah?
The press conference will announce the success that every Euro zone member contributed to.
The Germans brought the pig.
The French brought the Dior dress with décolletage revealing the pig's teats.
The Italians brought the sexy stiletto high heels for the pig's feet.
The Belgies brought the lipstick.
The Portuguese and Spaniards brought the smoke and mirrors.
The Greeks brought the duct tape.
LOL Too bad nobody brings the blow and hookers...
I'm long hookers blowing.
The Germans are buying a pig
The Greeks are rioting big
The whole thing's a joke
Since the pig's in a poke
And the hole they continue to dig
turned on Bloomberg TV to check in ...nothing...nothing on the scrawl -- Zerohedge Rocks!!!
Perfect! They are the masters of the univers! 200 West street is getting jealous. Demagogy of the finest quality.
"Good Evening.
A deal is imminent.
Hier ist nichts zu sehen.
Jetzt bewegen sie bitte entlang..."
Entlang wohin denn?
"Überall, nur nicht hier!"
in das REICH der Märchen, der Elfen, der Trolle...
Scheisse, nicht mal Google funktioniert mehr, eh?!
Jetzt geht die Scheisse los, Griechenland ist insolvent, Deshalb haben wir kein Geld mehr fuer die Banksters.
Korrigieren. Wir Amerikaner können kaum Englisch sprechen ...
They should have plenty of priceless ancient treasures. A couple of them ought to cover $200 billion and then they can sue Germany for WW2 and then start working on something. Everybody else will probably need to sue Germany too.
Germany recalls its Gold from New York
New York 'discovers' it "just fuking disappeared" ...vapourised
WWIII begins
If Nixon denied the transfer of physical to Europe in 1971, why should Obama allow it in 2012?
Obama's not as smart as Nixon was....scary.
i don't think that thicko Bumma would ever be allowed near taking a decision
..."send flappy ears on another round of Golf would ya, we need to take a decision for him on ..."
Indeed Bumma has surpassed George Bush for days spent on the Golf course.. probably what the White House movers and shakers call 'Regime Change'
I am not even sure Barry Soetoro is smarter than Shrub...
Obama Bin Lyin'
Useful Idiot, Wall Street Puppet, Douche Bag Front Man and 'Prompter Readin' Fool Extraordinaire...
sodden_debt is our resident belgian caterer
he deliverz!
[he's probably a little short, too]
with a little tash and plump belly and very adapt at carrying a tray
I never used to be much of a conspiracy theorist.
But an "all seeing eye!?"
Can they make it any more fucking obvious?
Perhaps they are moving from conspiracy theory to conspiracy fact?
"We're from the government and we're here to help."
Thank god. For a second there I thought it was just going to be the same old shit on a different day...
L0L!!! sorry if UR not as excited as everybody else is or perhaps is not, or somebody, or more likely nobody is or is not, or something
not in february, t_k
we're grindin w/ the groundhog, BiCheZ!
Ever notice how there are always 6 more weeks of winter when that fat woodchuck pokes his head out? Cross quarters ftw.