Europe According To...
While we have shown this series of images by Bulgarian modern artist Yanko Tsvetkov previously, now that the question of European "unity" is more debatable than ever, and with a Greek referendum in effect guaranteeing the collapse of the Eurozone at least in its current framework, it makes sense to refresh on these pictures which straddle the thin line between reality and satire, which these days is one and the same. But no matter what, the important part is that everyone is hedged. Just ask MF Global... and MS.
Europe according to Greece:
Europe according to Germany:
Europe according to Italy:
Europe according to France:
Europe according to Spain:
Europe according to Switzerland:
Europe according to Britain:
Europe according to the US:
Europe according to Russia:
Europe according Poland:
Europe according Turkey:
Europe according to the Vatican:
and, as a special bonus, Europe according to Berlusconi:
(70 votes)
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so... if according to all these people Luxembourg doesn't even exist; does that mean I can feel safe on my little island?
it always has been a island............
Province number 10 of Belgium!
Only up until that time they learn to speak Luxembourgish!
Only up until that time they learn to speak Luxembourgish!
Love it!
Berlusconi sex tourism Inc.
Europe Rocks!
Free sex, drugs, and food stamps for everybody.
http://fucklloydblankfein.blogspot.com
These are so funny on many levels, I am an Orthodox convert from California, married to a Russian from Moldova, living in Germany, after three years in Zurich. I doubt there are that many Americans who would get the humor, but it was sweet!
Do you realize you are talking about ZH readers? Probably some of the smartest people I have never met. The jokes are not wasted on the US. Going back to my fractals and trying to stay away from Black Swans.
first time I've seen this - it is awesome!
I couldn't agree more. I was laughing alone. I am so glad that I am one of the 10% (whatever) of Americans that actually has traveled across that big, blue ocean. That made it even funnier. I love Beerland. I think I would like to stay there forever.
I agree, been around the world 10 times...at least. Even got married to Berlusconi's "Pussy on Fire" Maidens! She's a great mother, cooks better than any restaurant I've been to, sexy ex-model, and rocks my world! I hope Europe makes it thru this (hope we do as well).
US version FTW
Yeah.. I was hoping they would throw that in there for us..
That was funny. Thanks I needed a laugh.
This shit is hilarious!
Simply Brilliant.!
Reminded me of this old joke.
Only thing is today German police are like the elite force in profesionalism. Ive lost count how many times they let me get away with speeding, there so damm liberal.
The Gestapo relocated to the U.S.
You should see the equipment the NYPD, and their brothers in Jersey, have now. They were working diligently a few weeks ago, with their millions of dollars in equipment, to stop the Occupy Wall Street crowd from performing another 9/11. I was so proud of their patritotism, laziness, and overtime. God bless those thugs with a badge.
Most of them were relocated after WWII
... through the Vatican Rat-lines ... to the CIA....
absolutely hilarious! thank you gojam
The Italians would be the lovers,
The French would be the cooks,
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Just this voids that little US propagandist charade.
Cooking on a world scale is either Italian or Chinese.
Cant expect geographically challenged US citizens to have their stereotypes right though...
I saw the same joke a long time ago, only instead of "administrators" it was "bankers". Brrr!
Holy shit. I can't stop laughing. Made my day.
The Berlusconi one, with the word "pussy" in every country, was worth a million dollars. I would have liked to have seen Merkleland. The words dildo, vibrator and red ball would have had to have been worked in there somehow.
US map -> France = smelly people. Can't stop laughing. Plus Spain as Mexico, so true, Americans and geography don't mix.
They need to get rid of all of those confusing, meaningless border lines. A word cloud would be sufficient.
Besides, it's been decades since "we" bombed there, so it isn't like they are recognizable anyway.
It is always funny to hear somebody call a Spaniard a "spic" because they speak Spanish. It is as funny as when our brain dead media calls somebody from Jamaica or Haiti an "African American" because they are black. The brain dead lemmings in the press can't understand that somebody can't be an African American if they are not an "American".
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go buy some CDS on Hairy Brown Pussy Land.
...Secretary of State William Jennings Bryan, found the Haitian elite rather amusing: "Dear me, think of it, Niggers speaking French," he remarked. The effective ruler of Haiti, Marine Colonel L.W.T. Waller, who arrived fresh from appalling atrocities in the conquest of the Philippines, was not amused: "they are real nigger and no mistake...real nigs beneath the surface," he said, rejecting any negotiations or other "bowing and scraping to these coons," particularly the educated Haitians for whom this bloodthirsty lout had a special hatred. Assistant Secretary of the Navy Franklin Delano Roosevelt, while never approaching the racist fanaticism and thuggery of his distant relative Theodore Roosevelt, shared the feelings of his colleagues. On a visit to occupied Haiti in 1917, he recorded in his diary a comment by his travelling companion, who later became the Occupation's leading civilian official. Fascinated by the Haitian Minister of Agriculture, he "couldn't help saying to myself," he told FDR, "that man would have brought $1,500 at auction in New Orleans in 1860 for stud purposes." "Roosevelt appears to have relished the story,"... .
from Chomsky's Year 501
FDR. What an angel that man was.
right up there with Hitler and Stalin for some i imagine. Best funeral in history...FDR's. I don't recall any tears as was the case with Stalin.
The effective ruler of Haiti, Marine Colonel L.W.T. Waller, who arrived fresh from appalling atrocities in the conquest of the Philippines,
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Hush hush, cant remember US propaganda? Marines are only one colour, green?
US world order.
Burlusconiana!!
Where's Bang Dae Ho when we need him?
Too funny - btw
The WH told us today over the first two quarters of the budget US will have an $861B deficit (annualized at $1.7 Trillion)...do a little quick math that the Fed, state, local gov now constitutes 45%+ of GDP at $7T and no, no we are not growing anything but our indebtedness. Growing debt by $1.7T'ish annually to gain 1.5% annually GDP or $300B. Rather than a multiplier effect this has a divisor effect...but soon gov spending will eclipse 50%, 60%...man, we are more like Greece every day.
All I took from your post is that I should be buying stocks right now. Did I miss anything?
Never fails. Everytime I see White House abbreviated as WH, I have to stop my brain from translating it to Wehrmacht.
It's more of a tan color these days....
Accordijng to Germany, Switzerland should be "Tax haven". Turkey "source of welfare Migrants".
There is more than a little bit of truth in these maps. Fascinating how well this guy knows the mentalities of the people of the European nations.
I could go for some melancholic pussy right now!
Your avatar has a lot of blue in it.
If you look closely there's a little pink also ;)
Mystique's g-spot.
+1oo m's g spt
Post of the day.
Yes, Tyler, yes! Keep publishing articles on Europe! Europe is very important and it is hard for me to get ANY decent news anywhere (ex. ZH).
PS
Very funny!
Here's my favourite - from the early 80's. Spitting Image Tory map of the world. The world hasn't changed much since then.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/jonanamary/231354631/sizes/o/
Thank you
"...people who'll shit in your airing cupboard if you'll let them" - comedy gold
Green for excellent map Grimbert!
Greek Homo Fellows and Kebab World? Mercy Buckets!
Perceptual bias, what a wonderful thing.
....uh, where's Europe according to AIPAC? What's with this obvious anti-semitic discrimination?
One word---------awesome
I don't see "The Meek" on any of those maps. Whadup?
Oh, that made me laugh. Well done whoever is responsible
Americans are geographically challenged. The US graphic above nailed it. lol @ Brazil / Mexico.
Americans are no more challenged than their Euro trash counterparts. I have never met a European who could name all 50 states, their capitols, the largest lake in the US, etc. I am sorry all of Western Europe fits into Texas (you know, that large state that borders Mexico). Quiz: what other states border Texas? That is what I thought.
Hmm, arent the Spanish folks and Mexican folks related somehow? Seems to me I read that somewhere. Something about the same language and lineage? Nevermind.
There is a huge difference between a foreigner being able to name all 50 states or their capitals, and an American who can't find a frigging country on a world map. It's been my experience in my travels that Americans are decidedly behind the curve in this regards. YMMV.
And, reasonably, since most US states are as big and have as big of economies as most Friggin European countries, why cant you name all 50 and show me where they are on a map? Oh yeah, geographically challenged. I mean, it is so obvious, isnt it?
Fewer than 1% of Americans can name all 50 states!! And fewer than 10% in each state could name their own state capital!!
Citation please, and of course, the comparitive statistics for Euro trash or your comment becomes meaningless.
And, from the two above posts, a smaller percentage of Euro trash know the difference between capital and capitol, this is a financial website right?
(dup)
Look it up on Wilkapedia did we?
Now, if Europeans could discover deodorant!
LOL! The capitol is the legislative building within the capital city, knuckle-dragger!!
You merely serve to emphasise my point and make yourself look more stupid every time you post!
And you know that difference? And you know "capitol" is not American also?
Seeing as many foreign countries are larger than some US states, according to your logic, US citizens should recognize those before their own states.
The equivalent of expecting foreigners to know all our 50 states, would be for them to expect us to know all their provinces.
Don't you get embarrassed saying so many mind-numbingly stupid things?
My dear lad, your logic is clearly flawed, two inconsistent propositions. So, which is it: (1) that people should adopt my proposition that because states are large and economically important they should be known, or (2) that knowing insignificant sized and economically insignificant provinces in Europe is the same as knowing US states? Which point are you arguing? Your ad hominen post makes no sense.
I am American, I grew up in a town of 17,000 people, and I know all states, all capitOLS, and I can point to every country in the world. To say that I know less geography than Europeans, (when I have seen first hand the Euro trash trolling the streets of London, Moscow, Geneva, Paris, et al) is nothing but pure prejudice and ignorance.
I think insecure Euro trash likes to beat this drum, but the Europeans are just as dumbed down as most Americans, and are a lot less gentile, less kind, less forgiving. Europeans are generally brutes.
...My dear lad, your logic is clearly flawed, two inconsistent propositions. So, which is it: (1) that people should adopt my proposition that because states are large and economically important they should be known, or (2) that knowing insignificant sized and economically insignificant provinces in Europe is the same as knowing US states? Which point are you arguing? Your ad hominen post makes no sense.
Nice false dichotomy. But the reason one could expect to be able to point out sovereign European countries on a map is because of their cultural divergences, their different languages, their differing economies, cuisine, political systems. Not to mention that many of them were centers of enormous empires at various stages throughout European history, which spans thousands of years.
As I said, expecting foreigners to be able to differentiate North from South Carolina on a map would be like a Russian expecting a US citizen to be able to differentiate Tambov from Tartarstan.
As for how gentle, kind and forgiving we Americans are compared to brutish Euros - I see you're now attempting to change the subject. But I leave you with this question - for all their loving, gentle kindness, who has higher rates of the incarceration and prisoner executions? The US or their brutish Euro cousins?
Once again, logic escapes you. What causal relationship exists between the fact you cite and the conclusion you attempt to derive. A statistician would call your argument spurious. Try to open the mind and think, think, think....could there be other causes?
Doesn't matter, bottom line is Europeans are generally well dressed pricks that fail to bathe, usually smell and have bad teeth, and like to demean others for not having skills they themselves lack. Europeans are generally insecure and use ad hominen attacks as a self defense mechanism to mask insecurities, I have witnessed it time and time again.
You don't know when you're beaten, I'll say that for you.
What a fucked up cowboy!
You mean there's a country other than America? Says who? It say's right in the Constitution "We the People." What else do we have to know?
Oh man.....tooooo funny. Windshield for spain was priceless
EPIC LOL
wonderfully accurate and so so funny
very cool, thanks.
I'd like to see one from the Irish perspective.
It looks pretty similar to the standard map. It's just missing Great Britain.
"we invented beer here. we invented beer here, too. we invented beer here. And here as well. Oh, yeah...and then they killed us for it." To beer!
http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2011/10/30/cain-campaign-responds-t...
the mark of cain. good grief, why is anyone giving this loser the time of day. the man is a nutjob. he has bodies all over the place.......president cain. oh boy has a nice ring to it doesn't it? yeh sure cain. God told you to run for office. yeh sure pal..
Goes far in showing it'll never be a UNION!!!
Funny Shit though!
Still laughing. Best maps of Europe, ever.
Say hello to my new screensaver.
Eye opener
Very funny maps!
But I want to differ re the Greek referendum. Other EU leaders may claim to be shocked by G-Pap's proposal to introduce a referendum, but I wonder... Thus far, G-Pap has done nothing without the ok of higher powers (EU, IMF, etc). Unless he has made contact with some extraterrestrials who have guaranteed him a luxury retirement home on Mars, I cannot believe he would disappoint his bosses... He already knows he can't live in Greece (assuming the country still exists) after his term is up. He would have to look outside of earth if he also angers the EU leaders.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=0_C2HJvtRDY
current Greek national anthem