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Eurosis For Dummies - A Timely Reminder

Tyler Durden's picture


Just over six months ago the following clip provided the most succinct explanation of the European crisis. It seems after this weekend's debacle and today's market wake-up call that a reminder is needed. Perhaps summed up best by the following interchange, this is five minutes well-spent:

Where does the money for the bailouts come from?
All the governments in Europe including Greece, Italy, and Spain.

And who is allowed to receive money from it?
All the governments in Europe including Greece, Italy, and Spain.

How can that possibly work?
It can't, but Europeans like bad ideas that sound nice!

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Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:19 | 2515265 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture



All bailout money comes miraculously from Saint Gutenburg, the patron saint of bankers.  I believe his cathedral relics are located in Heidelberg.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:20 | 2515296 Roy Bush
Roy Bush's picture

Taxpayers have nothing to do with the issue.  Taxes are never ever going to pay off the debts incurred by these governments. To imply they do is just a ruse to keep people voting and hoping for change that will never happen.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:28 | 2515327 Leopold B. Scotch
Leopold B. Scotch's picture

Yea! 99% 'ers.  Keep'n alive the audacity of HOPE, dammit!

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:32 | 2515332 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture



Taxpayers have nothing to do with the issue

The Inflation Tax we all pay has everything to do with this issue.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 15:22 | 2515701 Panafrican Funk...
Panafrican Funktron Robot's picture

I would give you gold stars, but I need that gold to cover my ass because of this.  

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 19:08 | 2516305 Hugh_Jorgan
Hugh_Jorgan's picture

The female character has the fundamental misconception that Government services and government jobs drive the economy.


Even the Europeans that get it, don't get it.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 17:47 | 2516127 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

+1 - still, it's smooth, too smooth. Well crafted propaganda. Well coordinated shorting advice. Lots of preparations...
We'll see, I'm skeptical of this one.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:37 | 2515350 goldfish1
goldfish1's picture

Next question:

Where do all the governments in the EU get the money for the bailouts?


Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:46 | 2515368 eclectic syncretist
eclectic syncretist's picture

Next question:

Where do all the governments in the EU get the money for the bailouts?

Answer - they get it from the imagineering departments at their local central bank


Mon, 06/11/2012 - 15:22 | 2515704 Not Too Important
Not Too Important's picture

As I understand it, when an EU country officially asks for a bailout, they are no longer obligated to contribute to future bailouts. So now, we've got four countries not contributing. Cyprus is probably next, followed by Italy. So the percentages of the remaining contributors are climbing mightily.

Now, even if an EU country didn't need a bailout (if there is such a thing) it would make financial sense to ask for something, and eliminate their percentage of bailout risk entirely. Ask for a few million, nothing much, and the responsibility is gone.

Ireland may want a rewrite, but all the others are looking at eliminating their group risk, vs. keeping their EU standing. A small bailout is all it takes.

And if Germany and/or France pulls out of the EU, who's left to fill the gap? And they're still owed on whatever debt they haven't sold to the ECB. Sell that debt to the Russians and let them collect. Brutal.

Russia and China (and all the rest of the non-western countries) are running away from Those Who Rule Canary Wharf as fast as they can. But they will buy the debt for pennies on the dollar and send in their "collectors". There won't be anything left if the western debtors want any energy.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 17:25 | 2516081 kraschenbern
kraschenbern's picture

But paying off the debt is not the issue.  Debt service is.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:54 | 2515394 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture


this whole discussion is based on an illusion that you are pointing at.

Nothing is real it is all digital.

Ones and zeros on a server somehwere.

In a sense it is miraculously created, like Aphrodite from Zeus head it springs full grown. A thought turned "real".

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:15 | 2515272 fourchan
fourchan's picture

systematic problems can not be fixed piecemeal.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 16:38 | 2515947 OldPossum
OldPossum's picture

...don't you mean "systemic"? ;-)

but then, of course, you are right. The first systemic problem is capitalism, a system depending on perpetual annual growth on a planet with finite and nearly exhausted resources. And the second are interests, leading fo exponential growth of debts. 

Btw: Occupy's David Graeber wrote "DEBT - The First 5000 Years" --  a good read. Looks like "debts" are the third systemic problem..!

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:15 | 2515273 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

Another reminder from Clarke and Dawes:

Clarke and Dawes ask the million dollar questions ABC News Australian Broadcasting Corporation



Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:20 | 2515297 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



Priceless.  I like the "you're wasting a lot of valuable time here, Roger..."

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:15 | 2515276 icanhasbailout
icanhasbailout's picture

the money comes from you, at gunpoint

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:16 | 2515277 txsilverbug
txsilverbug's picture

baffle em with bullshit.. that seems to be what has been working lately..

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:31 | 2515335 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

The cirlce argument of bailing out countries is often blamed on the social progams of said country, yet the bailout money goes to the banks and the people of those countries get higher taxes.  I wish more would see the banks are the pivot man in this game of limp biscuit.

I guess there are still millions in this world that are fooled by "Look over there!" act of distraction.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:36 | 2515348 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Nah, it's all connected. If not for all of that social program spending (of all stripes), they wouldn't have had to borrow all of that "money" from the banksters.

Which isn't to say I consider any "citizen" liable for these debts incurred. But there's a connection, all right, as it is the core problem.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:40 | 2515356 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Yet the banks lend out this money, knowing full well said countries will default or have to restructure (i.e. bailout) and the banks make out again.  The intermediary money changers are what allows for these hollow promises for social welfare to even be uttered and propped up.  In the end, the resources going to the banks FAR outweigh any social safety net outflows, no?

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:47 | 2515374 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture


Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:49 | 2515378 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Is that a cookie?  I swear that looks like a cookie.  I'm gonna go check it out.  What were we talking about again?  Damn, this is one good cookie.  Did you guys try this cookie over here?

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 17:26 | 2516083 kraschenbern
kraschenbern's picture

Nothing to see here; move along.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:44 | 2515364 goldfish1
goldfish1's picture

B U L L S H I T. Core problem your ass. Social programs are the fraction that keeps the rubes in line while the whole is stolen out from under their noses. Wake up, rube.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:51 | 2515386 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

That is the way I tend to look at it.  Chances are I will continue to view it this way until someone can provide me truth otherwise. 

In the end, I am tired of being collateral for some bankers who end up extracting taxes from me because of some arbitrary national boundries that came as a result of someone else's fight.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 17:11 | 2516058 Umh
Umh's picture

I'm not even going to say that bankers are innocent, but they did'nt want to buy all that sovereign debt. If they did want to buy massive quantities of sovereign debt they would at least diversify and buy other countries debt. It's like the old saying that you don't want your retirement account invested in your employers stocks or bonds.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:16 | 2515279 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



Is it wrong if my eyeglasses fetish extends to computer-animated office workers?

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:22 | 2515306 cdude
cdude's picture

Nothing wrong with it as long as it's "consensual". 

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:16 | 2515281 Snakeeyes
Snakeeyes's picture


Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:20 | 2515301 Boilermaker
Boilermaker's picture


Just as they equities markets gets rammed back to parity.  Direct intervention at 12:30 and constant bid up since in a straight line.

Why don't you create an animation about that.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:22 | 2515304 ArrestBobRubin
ArrestBobRubin's picture

And what did the "governments" do with it?

Handed the "money" right back to their true paymasters, the very same global bankster trash who brought their once-great nations into a state of financial, societal and cultural ruin. For fun and profit.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:25 | 2515312 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

I want to take that British office woman with glasses home with me.  

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:27 | 2515320 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

so ~ you're a jogger are you?

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:30 | 2515336 Temporalist
Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:34 | 2515343 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat...

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:26 | 2515314 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture


Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:26 | 2515316 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

It's called working together as in we need to get out of this deep hole buy using shovels and digging some more.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 17:32 | 2516093 Umh
Umh's picture

Could you at least dig on an upward slant:)

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:26 | 2515318 junkyardjack
junkyardjack's picture

In the meantime while everyone is trying to figure it out, BTFD....

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:27 | 2515322 sockratte
sockratte's picture

if you sink, you must spread your arms...

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:28 | 2515329 Peter Pan
Peter Pan's picture

The European leadership are about as useful as a plumber on the Titanic.

Just remember, there AIN'T any real money funding these hare brained schemes. Just useless guarantees.

Anyone who says after the collapse that it all happened too fast, will need to be shot. This collapse is about the slowest one could wish for in terms of preparing.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:55 | 2515395 Sweet Chicken
Sweet Chicken's picture

True dat!

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:28 | 2515330 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

BTFD is over, it is now time for STFP

Short The Fucking Pop

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:29 | 2515331 TNTARG
TNTARG's picture

2nd. statement is wrong.

The money doesn't go to "Italy, Spain", etc., but tu PRIVATE BANKS of those States.

That is to say: The bank's gambling has to be paid by the citizens.


Nice "socialism" for the banks!!!

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:36 | 2515346 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Bingo!  Bank execs decry socialism for the people, while at the same time taking socialism for the banks.  Yet people buy this load of bullshit and start arguing that it is the fault of people on welfare.  I don't agree with any form of socialism, as it relies on enforcement of said socialism through violenc, yet the masses fall for it hook, line, and stinker.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:33 | 2515337 rwe2late
rwe2late's picture

 The video is a dummy's explanation for other dummies.


Who pays for the bailouts?: The citizens of every country

Who gets the bailouts?: The financial syndicate of no country.

How can that work?: The swindle works by misdirection and lies, primarily through the mainstream media. But often with the help of uncritical dupes (or dopes?) who, after subtle and not-so-subtle appeals to their prejudices, parrot the MSM narrative.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:36 | 2515345 THE DORK OF CORK
THE DORK OF CORK's picture

What a load of Horseshit.


Lets look at real resourse usage.

 Spain - 8.6% decline in oil consumption YoY (March)

Italy can take more Leeches as it is much less Leveraged then Spain but a decline of 12.2% YoY is quite something.

But Nobody is asking where this blood / oil / credit is going ?

If America reduced its oil consumption 12.2 % in one year many thousands would die walking to the Supermarket.

Mon, 06/11/2012 - 13:45 | 2515367 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

Let's focus on resource usage. The Libs tell us that we use more than our fair share of the natural resources of the world.  But notice they also say that the US debt means nothing.

Let's look at it this way, if the US wasn't borrowing $1 trillion per year to "fund" the government, investors would be able to lend that money to all of the "poorer" countries around the world.  The US Government is consuming most of the available credit available in the world and no one says a thing.

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