Tyler Durden's picture

Forget that S&P 500 e-mini futures plunged to four-month lows at 1290; or Treasury yields crashed back to their record lows; or Gold and Silver's surge today; or WTI's plummet to almost a $90 handle; or Citi joining Morgan Stanley in the red year-to-date; or credit markets continuing into the red for the year; or IG9 10Y soaring further to 160bps - widest in 6 months; or VIX closing above 25% for the first time in 5 months (and decompressing to Europe's pain). Today was all about one thing - the disaster that was/is/and will be Facebook - between late openings, overwhelmed systems, a dump to the syndicate bid and almost 600mm shares traded with the syndicate just soaking it all up at $38.00 early and into the close. Is it any wonder that every other social media stock plunged and how do they expect to ever get another internet IPO off again (at anything but a massive discount). No matter what correlation trick was tried to juice markets today - for the tenth day-in-a-row markets saw a BTFD turn into a STFR. Not a pretty end to the ugliest week in six month for the S&P 500 as it nears its 200DMA into the close.


and (h/t Dennis Dick) for the following visual of the HFT tractor beam in FB...

And the massive dominance of the syndicate bid (as who else could it have been) is clear in this chart of the volume profile for today...with Facebook's VWAP perfectly at $40 by the close...


Morgan Stanley = Zuckerpunched



And the S&P 500 e-mini  futures SNAFU continues...


Utilities, Energy, and Materials are all now down YTD with Industrials close...


Gold had quite a week...

and longer-term stocks are catching up to risk-assets (proxied here by CONTEXT)...

And corporate bonds (dark red below) are now starting to get hit by the selling in the indices...

A quick run down of the day's events from Bloomberg TV:

Finally, this is what happens, Larry, when due to lack of real demand, you sell the second largest IPO in history to 25% retail, which has absolutely no idea how to trade a $100+ billion company and preserve the illusion of the ponz.

Charts: Bloomberg and Capital Context

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Bizaro World's picture

Though I'm pleased w/ the rise in Gold, cautiously optimistic is a good description. The jump in Gold was not due to sudden muppet revelations.

Nader_Nazemi's picture

The market is a big Casino. 

The whole thing is rigged. 

CrashisOptimistic's picture

A bit of casino odds measurement:

Close was 1295.  Dec 31, 2011 (and btw also Dec 31, 2010) was 1257.  Yes, for both 2011 and 2010, same close (tiny fractional difference, 2011 was DOWN from 2010).

This puts the silliness up 3.02% for 17 months.  Negative real return.

walcott's picture



facebook is horseshit people. Dump your account immediately.

the original facebook.


el_brio's picture

Meanwhile Theophilus Hodges, a 36-year-old property manager, stopped into an E*Trade branch in downtown Chicago on Friday morning specifically to open an account to buy Facebook shares, he said.

"If it wasn't for Facebook I wouldn't be here," he said as he left the branch to go to his bank and transfer money into his new account. "I missed out on Groupon when it went public, so I'm not going to miss the boat this time."

Mr. Hodges said he plans to invest $10,000 in Facebook shares—including $4,500 of his own money and $5,500 from his mother.

Mr. Hodges expressed confidence in Mark Zuckerberg as Facebook's CEO and said he isn't worried about Mr. Zuckerberg being young. "To me, he's a genius. You know, he created something for the whole world... Everything is social now. The world is a different place with Facebook," he said.



From the WSJ

el_brio's picture

In other words... when your shoe-shine guy starts telling you about a stock, it's time to run.  BUTCHER THIS PIG!!

Frodowise's picture

I hope he enjoys losing all of that money. 

iDealMeat's picture

Theophilus Hodges is $MDB

el_brio's picture

The first name sounds Greek doesn't it?

Normalcy Bias's picture

Yes, it sounds Nubian, Sub-Saharan Greek...

Edit: Go ahead, junk me. I've met a lot of Theo's, but anyone rolling with that full handle...I'm just saying...

gatorengineer's picture

Sounds like his mom liked alphabet soup and almost got a real name............. Almost

drink or die's picture

I didn't know MillionDollarBonus' name was Theophilus...


edit: crap, someone beat me to it

Scalaris's picture

*facepalm*    >    schadenfreudian transition    >    contemplation of darwinian survivalism    >    smirk

The Gooch's picture

Between Rahm and Zuck, Theophilus is FUKKED!

Race Car Driver's picture

> You know, he created something for the whole world... Everything is social now.

"Look, this is just an informal chat. We were wondering what you were working on in your lab?"

"Well, I've invented a pill that gives worms to ex-girlfriends."

"Right. And, what's positive about that?"

"Well, it's a pill, that gives worms to ex-girlfriends."

"Well, could it also give worms to ex-boyfriends?"

"This is a drug, for the world, to give worms to ex-girlfriends."


Global Hunter's picture

I didn't click on the link that's Brain Candy I think!  Great film let me see its been a while...

Taterboy's picture

Six months from now on the phone: "Hello?"

"Hi Mom, it's Theo,(long pause) Mom, Mom?"



TWSceptic's picture

Yes Facebook will make a lot of people less social with each other, the irony...

Taterboy's picture

Late today it was announced that a Mr. Theophilus Hodges was appointed Greece's Minister of Finance.

fuu's picture

That's why the euro surged late.

resurger's picture

is this /sarc?! or are you for real?!!!!!!!!!

Catflappo's picture

I think the real question is - "is your question sarc or for real?"

Waterfallsparkles's picture

Many Real Estate people jumped on the Band wagon in 2000 who never had previously invested their Money in the Stock Market and lost their Ass ets.

Never to trade ever again.

RmcAZ's picture

But, but... GRPN is down 55% since it launched. What exactly did he miss out on?

Monkeyfister's picture


Here's to seeing the end of that POS excuse for a "company" by the end of next week.


Mark123's picture

Check out all the other recent IPO stocks (P, Grpn, Zynga, LNKD etc)....all of them got whacked today.  I smell some fear in the air.

Race Car Driver's picture


No, seriously ... LOL!

Caviar Emptor's picture

They waited too long. Like a fine wine that's faded badly. Like a once beautiful woman. Like a flower that's just starting to fade. 

pods's picture

Like a bloated corpse that sits in the garage long after the car has run out of gas?


Aztec Warrior's picture

Here comes another bubble At least webvan came with paper share certificates which you could sell on ebay in a decade

1835jackson's picture

Zuckerburg is throwing a party tonight at his crib. I wonder if he will get shit faced?

Ned Zeppelin's picture

I think they call it Laughing All The Way To The Bank.


gatorengineer's picture

Monster Energy Drink and Ugly Asians Woooo Hoooooooooooooo...........................


Wont be a real CEO until he figures out hookers and blow......

Caviar Emptor's picture

A Suggestion: Next time, don't focus on FACES. Aim a bit lower......just sayin'

Death and Gravity's picture

I will tell my grandkids - I was there when it happened, and they won't have a clue what I'm talking about.

Zero Govt's picture

they won't have a clue what you're on about because it was floated at $38.00 and probably closed at $38.10 and think, "Grandpa thinks watching paint dry is an event, WTF???"

Barometer's picture

Where will it trade when you can short it

billhilly's picture

It was amazing to watch the bid size at 38.00.  It seemed unlimited.  I had straight 99999s across my size for the longest damn time toward the close.  Seems someone was not nterested in seeing any 37, or lower, print.  Kinda fishy to me.

LarryDavis's picture

Are you intimating the stock markets aren't perfectly efficient or free? What the fuck are you getting at? I think the markets are fine. Another fucking conspiracy theorist. Bob Pisani said in Trader Talk that he wants Facebook to succeed. Maybe people were just following his sage-like advice.

LarryDavis's picture

Just so ZH knows, I went long VIX at 15. What a fucking no brainer. I'm not a particularly gifted investor but YOU CAN"T GO WRONG SHORTING FACEBOOK. BET THE FARM. Unless QE3 rolls into town......

LarryDavis's picture

I actually loathe investing because I don't want to contribute to that system. The only way I can morally justify any kind of financial "trade" is by thinking that there might be some fund or investment bank on the other end. I really like the idea redistributing wealth to me. If anyone has any adivice on expediting that process please chime in.

Winston Smith 2009's picture

"I had straight 99999s across my size for the longest damn time toward the close."


Freddie's picture

There is no way they will let it drop below $38.00.  They closed it at $38.01.  What a joke.

Trimmed Hedge's picture

After-hours trading, bitchez!!

Mark123's picture

You should print out the chart for FB today and frame it.  It will make a lovely curio in years to come when your grandchildren ask you to tell them about the madness at the turn of the last century.