First Chevron, Now Shell's California Refinery Issues "Civil Emergency"

Tyler Durden's picture




 

UPDATE: Local Police have said that this is a false alarm and there is no emergency at the Shell Refinery.

In what can only be the strangest and most worrisome coincidence, the Shell refinery in Martinez has just issued an Immediate-Severe-Likely public "Shelter-in-Place" emergency alert:

RESIDENTS IN MARTINEZ. ARE ADVISED TO SHELTER IN PLACE. GO INSIDE. CLOSE ALL WINDOWS AND DOORS. TURN OFF ALL HEATERS. AIR CONDITIONERS AND FANS. IF NOT USING THE FIREPLACE. CLOSE FIREPLACE DAMPERS AND VENTS. AND COVER CRACKS AROUND DOORS AND WINDOWS WITH TAPE OR DAMPED TOWELS. MEDIA NEWS NETWORKS WILL CONTINUE TO CARRY UPDATED EMERGENCY INFORMATION. STAY OFF THE TELEPHONE UNLESS YOU HAVE A LIFE THREATENING EMERGENCY.

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Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:35 | 2687523 valkir
valkir's picture

Very soon Beverly Hills properties will be 2 for 1 $.After everyone realises what is comming from Fukushima.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:36 | 2687525 Clayton Bigsby
Clayton Bigsby's picture

rut-roh

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:36 | 2687526 Deathrips
Deathrips's picture

Maybe we could get all those talking head windbags from all over the globe and they could suck it all up ....or blow it all away.

 

All joking aside..this sucks.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:38 | 2687529 divide_by_zero
divide_by_zero's picture

Big Sis shoulda been watching them real terrorists a bit closer and not so focused on patting down granny. Chem and Refinery plants were known primary targets.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:38 | 2687541 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Hell Jerry Brown probably invited them if they'd just pay a little taxes

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:47 | 2687581 BliptoP3
BliptoP3's picture

The more they pat granny down the more refineries she blows up - when will they learn: "The more you tighten your grip - the more star systems will slip through your fingers."

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:47 | 2687582 BliptoP3
BliptoP3's picture

DP

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:52 | 2687616 Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture

 

 

I often thought that refineries would be an easy terrorist target. 50 Towel Heads with 50 calibers (what’s their range?) could probably do a lot of industrial damage. Next up: key transformers in the power grid?

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 12:47 | 2688048 LFMayor
LFMayor's picture

how about one wiith the welding supply company truck he just jacked, loaded with o2 and c2h2 weld cylinders?   That's less overhead and lots more bang for the buck.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 13:04 | 2688092 mick_richfield
mick_richfield's picture

50 cal M82 Barrett has an effective range over a mile.

Key transformers are EHV giants near large power stations, waiting time of 3 years for a new one, and no spares to speak of in the country.  They are huge things, and I doubt 50 cal would harm them much, but not sure.   They are the things we are woried about in case of large EMP event.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 11:11 | 2687688 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

Big Sis is in on the game, so why would she rat out her own crew?

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:36 | 2687530 Hype Alert
Hype Alert's picture

Conditioning.  Stay indoors.  Do not attempt to move about.

In the past they would evacuate people.  Maybe there is no where to go?

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:54 | 2687631 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

No shit.  Stay put....we are from the government and we are here to help.

Just like the military training excercises taking place on each corner of Amerika.  The traning is not for the military, but for the plebes. 

Step 1. Condition population that military activity on US streets normal.

Step 2. Condition population to stay put during any and all situations and wait for further directions from government.

Step 3. Start PR campaign "All Aboard To Auswitch" - We restrict your calories so you don't have too.  You will love it.  (credit to Gerald Celente."

Step 4. Collect gold teeth, shoes, and disenters.

Step 5. PROFIT!!!!

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 11:10 | 2687684 Winston of Oceania
Winston of Oceania's picture

Why do you suppose that playgrounds at the local indoctination centers ALL have fences with gates around them now. Conditioning for the sheep so that they feel safe and secure.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:37 | 2687531 Central Wanker
Central Wanker's picture
co·in·ci·dence/k??ins?d?ns/ Noun:
  1. A remarkable concurrence of events or circumstances without apparent causal connection.
  2. Correspondence in nature or in time of occurrence.
Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:46 | 2687580 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Well... Passports seem to hold up well against kerosene fire, pulverization, & nano thermite... So benzene ought to be a cinch!

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:37 | 2687534 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Nothing to see here...certainly not an attack...all is well move along people resume buying stocks.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:37 | 2687535 wcvarones
wcvarones's picture

Q. What do you call a shutdown at the Shell refinery?

A. A dry Martinez.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:38 | 2687538 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

We're from FEMA & we're here to help...

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:39 | 2687545 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

There are no coincidences. Why is gas and food cost rising? It's certainly not because of QE forever......it's that pesky drought and old refineries.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 11:15 | 2687704 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

I've always wondered how a giant steel structure that is not exposed to elements that would cause it's deteriation would wear out or become obsolete. It's also worrying that even that same structure was updated regularly to maitain safety standards. They must have been using steel from the WTC pours. 

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:39 | 2687546 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

'Worrisome'? Nonsense....muppets resume your normal daily activity of buying stocks.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:39 | 2687547 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Helluva job Brownie

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:40 | 2687550 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Hide the guns, women and children.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:41 | 2687553 Börjesson
Börjesson's picture

To have an emergency at one refinery may be regarded as a misfortune; to have an emergency at two smacks of carelessness.

 

(With apologies to Oscar Wilde.)

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:50 | 2687607 Mysteerious Roo...
Mysteerious Rooshian Vooman's picture

 

 

Dear Aunt Augusta:

LOL! +10.

Mysteerious Rooshian Vooman

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:41 | 2687556 101 years and c...
101 years and counting's picture

jacking up oil due to refinery problems is just another way to "turn risk on".  to hell with the people that may suffer.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:43 | 2687569 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Maybe the Syrian situation isn't going as well as planned since the Russians showed up...

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:46 | 2687585 magpie
magpie's picture

I thought they already abandoned Syria, right until the Rebels deciced to blow up a general of theirs yesterday.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:50 | 2687610 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Central Planning is hard when the central planners want paid vacations in their bennies packages...

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:42 | 2687564 zilverreiger
zilverreiger's picture

SCADA viruses backfiring? ;p

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:43 | 2687568 Ignorance is bliss
Ignorance is bliss's picture

The Iranians did it. Let's bomb them back to Babylon !!!

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:44 | 2687571 Sean7k
Sean7k's picture

Refineries are having a baddddddd month. Wisconsin, Chicago, Oklahoma, and now two in the bay area. Major media reports? Stay tuned, looks like it's going to get interesting- especially since Congress is on vacation and the EU is on vacation.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 11:16 | 2687708 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

I notice that all hell breaks lose when Congress is not in session. I wonder why that is...

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:45 | 2687573 The Wizard of Oz
The Wizard of Oz's picture

Inadvertent alert. All is okay. Please continue to buy WTI. 

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:46 | 2687577 You Didn't Buil...
You Didn't Build That's picture

What will the leukemia cancer rate be in California in ten years? Oncology may be the next growth industry.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:49 | 2687598 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Then they'll have to take out the marijuana plantations & the apricot orchards too...

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:46 | 2687583 dow2000
dow2000's picture

Iran claims resposibility for these two attacks in response to the Stuxnet virus deployed by the currecnt US administration against Iran...

Check to you...

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:47 | 2687586 WTF_247
WTF_247's picture

No way that is coincidence.  Sounds like sabotage to me but what do I know.

California has not allowed anyone to build a new refinery in over 30 years - they have made it so cost prohibitive to the point no one will do it.  Just the environmental studies to do so would likely take a decade, then end up in endless litigation in court from every environmental group out there (which all use gasoline and drive cars to the courthouse ...)

Even if every refinery shut down and gas went to $12.00 per gallon I doubt the retards that run this state would even care.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 11:04 | 2687671 Winston of Oceania
Winston of Oceania's picture

They're long bicycles the bastards...

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 11:13 | 2687697 LouisDega
LouisDega's picture

Huffy Biatchezz

images

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:49 | 2687602 DeFeralCat
DeFeralCat's picture

Knight algos doing community out-reach.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:50 | 2687604 WarPony
WarPony's picture

false alarm

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:53 | 2687623 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

So that makes two 'false alarm' fires on 8/8 just before the hour of 8 (the other one was the 88th floor of WTC1)...

Where's #3 going to come from?

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:52 | 2687617 strongband
strongband's picture

There was a misprint - it was meant to end with

 

STAY OFF THE TELEPHONE UNTIL YOU HAVE A LIFE THREATENING EMERGENCY.

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 10:52 | 2687624 moonman
moonman's picture

If they keep blowing up these True Blood factories what will the vampires feast on?

 

 

 

 

 

Oh yeah us

Wed, 08/08/2012 - 11:02 | 2687660 Bugsquasher
Bugsquasher's picture

Is that you Dirtdigger?

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