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Friday Afternoon Humor
Our joke di giorno has an unusual source: a Prime Minister with a penchant for buggery, who in this case has discovered a very curious source for all of Italy's woes...
ITALIAN PM BERLUSCONI:U.S FUNDS DIVESTED FROM INTALY, SPARKING CRISIS
So you see, it is now not the evil CDS speculators, nor the just as evil short sellers, nor even the vile blogs spreading seditious truth, that is to blame for Italy's imminet bankruptcy. It is... America (granted it is not quite Bush, but close).
Souce: Bloomberg
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Those darn Americans. How could they be so selfish as to not throw additional money at the European markets?
the gringos ... but hey, they got to make a living too. ... sorry, amigc and Ciao bella ...
Hahaha!
Hoho! & Heehee!
at least he isn't committed to having anal sex w/ ron.paul.con for the next 14 months like you are, tyler! TPTB rule zeroHedge!
here's slewie's candidate (if he runs) and, as we remember the "reason" that the USA now has a policy of torture and denial of, NOT "human rights", but denial of LAW & JUSTICE to all, please consider what the best freaking presidential candidate of the century has to say about this 9.11 weekend~~~yeah, the guy who has been on the ballot in all 50 states for the last two elections, ralphie-boy nader:
The Empire is Eating Itself » Counterpunch: Tells the Facts, Names the Names
L0L!!! (if you take a few minutes to read this piece, you will understand why he is the best candidate. if he runz, of course, no matter wtf tyler is hallucinating, politically, these daze)
i know...he can't ever win! he's just not mainstream enuf for the MSM and...zeroHedge...not one of the "tyler durden-approved" two-party system in america...
BULLSHIT!!!!!
fight club, BiCheZ!!!!
No way Nader can win Slewie... He disapproved of Pintos and Corvairs... and that is not a spicy Mexican meal...
If 1150 breaks hard on the spooz, this will be the ugliest close this year.
edit - 1151.40 @ 2.49 pm est, bitchez. 11 minutes away from seeing the major move.
didya read what ralphie-bot wrote abt 9.11, snidley?
and america?
that's a Y/N question
The Empire is Eating Itself » Counterpunch: Tells the Facts, Names the Names
if yep, whaddija think? your opinion is respected by others beside slewie, i'll bet
beyond that, i gave you the green fer yer fri PM humor, old sport!
Ok, Ok... I'll go read it... You're a persistent little mammal... back after perusal. Greenie to you...for courage of conviction, which few have.
must go play video poker & slots!
see ya later, snidley!
and, thxz! [for reading it]
I read and agree with it. You will find few who dispise the nonpatriot act more than I do. You will find few who are more aware than me of the destruction of our country caused by the parade of rotten pols and bankers since at least the 1960s.
Nader is fighting an unwinnable battle until the collapse... I hope he is around and can take the reins after the inevitable happens.
Thanks for the link
y.w.
you are most welcome S_W!
i know a lotta zeroheadz are waaay into r.paul, and i actually think he's the second best candidate after ralphie-boy, if r.nader is a candidate
i'm hoping some of r.pauls's peeps take nader as their #2 guy b/c if he doesn't get the republican nod or the VP slot, what the hell they gonna do?
if he does get the nod, nader might be able to put him in the WH, just by running
anyhow, thxz for your time and attention, here, snidley; that is one heluva piece of timely political writing for USA 2011, in my book!
i'll change my drift on tyler and r.paul. maybe. but, i do want to get people's attention, here, and it's quite hard w/ tyler throwing all these articles at the bloggerz
thxz again to you and any others that took the time from tyler's non-stop stuff to take a look at someone many may certainly see as their #2 and some as a # 1, with NO mainstream political baggage
p.s. i won $37.75! Yay!
slewie-
Ralph Nader was on our ballot for the McCain vs OBama show.
He got my vote.
Thanks, Slewie
Unfortunately for all of---I think that you are too bright and too honest for ZH. Maybe, it is time to move on.
You nearly inspire me to vote for my favorite candidate, Mr. Nader, but I definitely will not be here for the election. Thanks for your recent posts, they prove that not everyone is brain-dead in the US of A or ZH.
Good luck to you, brother om no sarcasm in this
You're not the only one who is angry at the overwhelming majority of reactionaries commenting on ZH, Slewie. But I don't think the blame lies with Tyler (though some of his "assistants" sure put out a stream of globalist and MSM fodder!). TD has never actually suggested Ron Paul as a solution [I could be wrong here, but I've never noticed it ... so, link/s please to any TD endorsement/s] ... even though, like many other alternative media sites, he sure gives RP plenty of coverage.
Everyone has a different understanding of the true nature of the root cause of the collapse ("it's the jooz", "it's the raghedz", "it's the bankstaz", "it's the borrowerz", "it's the layaboutz", "it's the unions", "it's the corporations", "it's the corporate executives", "it's the communists", "it's the capitalists", "it's the Austrians", "it's the Keynesians" ... ad infinitum) and that is a fundamental objective of those really behind the collapse ... to confuse, to misdirect, to create false trails, to finance and promote gatekeepers ... in short, to employ the Hegelian dialectic to progressively divide into smaller and smaller sub-units, or "teams", of supporters running in all the wrong directions in order to synthesize a solution (feudalism) to all of the above contrived theses and antitheses.
With all of those misdirected assumptions of the cause, comes a plethora of suggested 'solutions' and, quite frankly, I don't see ELECTING Ralph Nader (or anybody else, for that matter) as a sensible solution. Nader (he seems to be "clean") might be a more sensible choice than electing Ron Paul (just another gatekeeper, with deep connections to TPTB), or Perry (another Obama: not what he seems, and very dangerous), or Obama again (we all know he is not what he seemed, and has already proven to be exceptionally dangerous). Washington DC is an enemy of the American sovereign states and therefore of the American people ... so continuing to rely on electing a supreme puppet to control the puppet master is a fool's errand!
Back to Tyler and ZH: There is no doubt that ZH is a honeypot to flush out dissenters destined for Camp FEMA (whether TD intended it as such or not), but there has been no more critical voice than TD of the Fed, the Treasury, the policies of the Administration, the lies of the politicians, the regulators asleep at the wheel, the manipulations of the big financial insiders, and the blatant cheerleading by the MSM for the globalists. Nobody reading ZH can claim to be ignorant of what's going down and who's actively sinking the ship. Even Alex Jones (the master gatekeeper for those he will not name), who used to reference ZH many times each day on his sites, now only quotes ZH once in a while ... primarily because ZH is so effective at exposing the lies and has too many commenters critical of Ron Paul.
You may be "mad as hell and not going to take it any more", but don't shoot the messenger(s).
SECEDE NOW!!!
it was last weekend i-dog
i'll go dig it out
i'm not mad, i'm just fighting!
oldman: thxz for the nice vibes and ditto to you; it's pretty good here for slewie. i'm most thankful that tyler let's us publish our ideas here and try to beat the stuffin outa each other too
i really do like trying to kill trolls and plants and working with others to try to keep the site cookin for the real; fight club is a heluva book of psychological truth and the movie is awesome, the whole cast being one of the finest ensembles in celluloid history; it is a true honor to be part of that tradition and zeroHedge is the best site on the web, imo
our tyler(s) are fabulous writers and humor/satirist(s) and extremely knowledgeable about business, trading, bankstering, PMs, people, culture, the world, psychology and that's enuf for now. if i don't like something, i just go ape-shit and have made a fool of myself here almost as much as in my family and "social" life!
i found it i-dog!
i'm not against tyler, but i'm not afraid to mix it up w/him, either; i think t.d. understands where i'm coming from; i certainly hope so! again. i'm just so grateful for the opportunity to have my say, and i've learned so much here in 7+ months, that i quess i should take a minute to thank tyler et al and the other legit bloggers here: brothers & sisters, thank you all!
this "link" prob won't work, b/c i'm signed in and it opens to "welcome, slewie...", but here's the post: "I Am Jim Rogers And I Support Ron Paul" Submitted by tyler durden on 08/27/2011 13:24 -0400
there's a 31 sec youtoob of jim endorsing r.paul.
tyler's first sentence (paste): Ron Paul has another illustrious supporter - Jim Rogers.
2nd sentence: The Quantum fund co-founder, who has been spot on about pretty much everything for the past 3 years...
last sentence: Zero Hedge agrees on all counts. (emphases mine)
now, if i've misunderstood t.d., he can clarify things any time he wishes, right? but it's been two weeks, i_d, and if this isn't an endorsement of a candidate for president 14 months before the election, then i think tyler needs to clarify. there are 112 tweets and 430 facefuk "sends" on this puppy, big dawg! almost 500 blogs and shit and punches flying all over the place!
slewie, of course, called out rogers for being an ex-pat and questioned whether he or t.d. were even able to vote in the US and got in tyler's face and when jay-dub stepped up to "correct me" about for pushing back @ t.d. that was the end of any "friendship" we had!
at the same time i acknowledged tyler's absolute right, as our publisher to endorese any candidate he felt was the best
you were prob out burying gold!
thxz for asking!
peace
Bugger ... I just knew you'd catch me out. I didn't see that one.
One other thing to keep in mind is that we all let our language slip for the sake of brevity from time to time. For example, I might say that "I agree with Ron Paul", when in fact I really mean to say "I agree with Ron Paul on this and a couple of other issues, but I disagree with him on most others and I don't agree with electing a president or a federal government to solve all our problems anyway". That''s obviously not what TD meant, but I do try to pull myself up when making blanket statements.
However, I shouldn't be answering for TD ... since this site is in all probability a limited hangout to draw you and I into displaying our dissent from the status quo. (But I have never cared that it might be, since even just viewing this site will put one onto a FEMA invitation list, so expressing how I really feel won't change much ... maybe just losing the top bunk to an occasional viewer). LOL!
Keep up the good fight, you feisty pi-rat!!
hey, thanks!
at the poker table there are only two "social" rules
now, this isn't a poker table, ok?
but, still, i don't think jim was ambiguous in his endorsement of r.paul
and i don't think tyler was, either
he's down as agreeing entirely w/ jim on r.paul
tyler thinks he's the best guy a`la jim. clearly
i don't
no biggie, but, as a publisher, tyler cannot both endorse and not endorse a candidate at the same time
at least not on my watch
tyler coulda presented jim's views just as well w/out the last sentence
but, he didn't
no "partisan" is objective about politics
tyler included
he surrendered his objectivity on the nov, 2012 preZidential election on 8.27.11
again, that's his play, and he's entitled to make it
but he can't pretend to be objective at this point
"everybody's got an agenda" (t.d.)
so, he's down
i'm down
so fuking what?
i just checked. nader's running. he will be on the ballot in all 50 states for the third time. he will probably not be "invited" to a debate. again. he will probably not be "endorsed" by jack shit. again.
but slewie is gonna give him some copy here (poor bastard)
alex & jeff already publish him extensively on CP
i think there is a 99.9% chance every american will be able to vote for ralphie-boy, again, in 2012, if he or she so chooses
wtf! i'll take that and run all day long w/ it!
so go ahead and spend the next fuking year trying to get paul on the ballot, tyler; make my day!
Alright...who told? There's no way he could have figured that out on his own.
And then there was Bernank Two Times, who got that nickname because he said everything twice:
LMAO, classic Goodfellas. It never gets old
Pentagon has lots of money. Maybe Berlusconi would be willing to sell Sicily to be used as a forward staging base for Middle Eastern operations. Might be cheaper than the latest new carriers.
Is Berlusconi playing his fiddle while watching the Euro fiat burn?
Sicily is too far from Mid East... but the Lambrusco is great...
Malta would be better.
Deep water port.
+1
Sigonella near Cantania is a good naval air station... Not much of a port except for fishing smacks.
consider the birds of the air...
not to mention the no coast of libya!
[libya: once a "playground" for rommel, patton, and monty, then, a great "place" for the frog for'n legion, a "colony" of italy, a "kindom", a "dictatorship" the US cuddled up to earlier this decade so we could render our 'prisoners' there 2B tortured, and now a "complete fuking mess", ruled by winners, and soon to be a "democracy" according to that most beloved document of the "early" enlightenment,...and so on...and so forth,...and scooby dooby dooby...]
Libya had no central bank practicing fractional reserve banking, and it was resistant to OPEC and the USD/oil mechanism.
Amazingly enough, it now has a central bank (practicing fractional reserve banking) and is all aboard the USD/oil mechanism (with the big boys already carving up its oil fields).
I'm sure all of this is just a coincidence, after the fact, however (/sarc/).
Patton never fought in Libya...that was Tunisia, 1943.
you may be correct, but are you sure he never crossed the "border" to either engage, pursue, or retreat? no one from his div ever went across or fired across?
link?
a very close freind of my family was w/ the 3rd in europe and was the first allied officer to enter buchenwald, which was surrendered to him. so, i'm not trying to give you a hard time, i'd like to know. i'm not too up to speed on the no. africa campaign, tho...
Bush's America did it!
He's clearly learned well at the knee of the master scapegoater Obama.
Most soytainly not. It was Bush himself single-handedly, although I am still trying to figure out how someone considered so dumb, he became the butt of even kindergarten jokes, have been so competent and intelligent to be the root of just about everything evil some going back long before even his old man was born. Was the a dope with a disengaged managerial style? So me thinks, was he the evil as every tom dick & harry have been making the dope to be? Me no thinks so. Can't have it both ways.
Providing enough people will be left alive, and will give a shit, when all this shit is said and done, will show that the clintons, individually and together have been, and continue to be far worse and have done more damage to America than the worst traitors in our history - I doubt it we knew/know of them all. Obama is following in their footsteps. They all are on the same payroll and do not mean the US government.
You left Dick Cheney out of your cast of characters. That explains some of your dilemma about Dubya.
Evil does not necessarily equate with high intelligence, and if you really want to talk about traitors, take a close look at GWB's grandfather and his attemped coup.
http://www.arkancide.com
'sti stronzi!
hijos de puta!!!
It's going to be an ugly close, today - maybe -5% or more ugly.
Bunga-Bunga.
Yay! Finito.
BAC printing 6.97.... burn bitch.
I SAID BURN, BITCH!
Obamao acquired Italy's funds indirectly! And it was cause of Bush!
sigh.
We need your big american dollars.
LOL classic
i thought the worst of political scum all lived here.
He didnt blame, he explained the situation.
STFU and go make me a calzone
and make it just like mama used to make it...
where is the ****** gabagool?
ahaahaha.. you've been watching too much Soprano's or something ;)
not directly, but i watched this parody here maybe a dozen times:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w08YyikFm-8
Getting warmer.
A Prime minister with a penchant for buggery? Well that doesnt narrow the field at all.
this one's nicknamed "il douche"
The man has no shame. Like all the others in his profession, from Athens to Washington DC to Tokyo to London.
Someday these guys will be back to selling actual snake oil for $3US a bottle. And the world will still not be safe.
You think contemporary leaders are sociopaths?? Compare to 1930s fuckups: Mussolini, Churchill, Tojo, Hitler, Stalin, Roosevelt. Of course, reincarns of these guys are waiting in the wings. Hitler: "I'll be back....and next time no more Mr. Nice."
Divesting?
Isn't that the same thing as picking up your toys and going home when the kid whose house you're playing at shits in the sandbox?
Those damn Americans- how dare they not throw good money after bad on behalf of the European Kleptocracy...?
Well, Europe- I'm sorry, but we've got our own kleptocracy over here on this side of the Atlantic that also needs to be fed.
The Devil you know... blah blah blah.
No. It's picking up your toys and going home after you shit in the other kid's sandbox at his home.
We Must Get Tough.
Better yet, as you're leaving you take his head and push it into his poop in his sand box, each push being accompanied by a word consisting of;
God (push head in shit, pull back out)
Set (push, pull)
Me (push, pull)
Here (repeat)
To (again)
Straighten (again)
This (you get the drill)
Shit (encore)
Out (hold his head down a long time)
And then when you let his head back up and he's starting to scream, you take a big handful of "shit n' sand"* jam it in his mouth and as he's just becoming somewhat catatonic, slipping into shock, tell him that if he so much as breathes about this to his mommy or daddy, you'll tie him to a tree in the woods and set him on fucking fire.
Then see what he'll give you to make you go away.
And that's what Greece is doing to the rest of Europe. Skullfucking them for everything they can get.
Yahoo!
Ride 'em OuzoButtBoy
Knukles, That has to be one of your best. I can't stop laughing!
Underage prostitution is no joke.
"Berlusconi faces four criminal trials in Milan, including for corruption and underage prostitution. He says he has broken no laws."
http://www.adnkronos.com/IGN/Aki/English/Politics/Italy-Berlusconi-prost...
yes, if your name is DSK...it all depends ...
Berlusconi's version of a stimulus package
Well of Corsica.
You cannot breaka the law if you are abova the law.
Aya, she tolda me she was'a twenty'a two'a.
It's not'a mah faulta
...response from Rosemary's Baby's Team America, Fiat will now be called Freedom Cars. lol
I'm a yankee doodle dandy....
But hey, Berlusconi just wasn't up to being in the Macroni Club, eh?
stugazt foogayzie!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TiGEhCuD9Q&feature=related
Speaking of humor, this from Marketwatch...
Gold no safer than stocks? September 9, 2011, 1:44 PMIn a sign of just how unpredictable the markets have become, a gold volatility index is now showing the precious metal carrying risks comparable with the S&P 500, according to a Dow Jones report.
The Gold Volatility Index XX:GVZ rose 3.8% to 35.75 in late-morning trade, while the VIX VIX rose 17% to 40.02.
-Tom Bemis
Yeah, but that's just paper gold, so there is a kernel of truth to the story. That tree is gonna have the shit shaken out of it, right up until they snap it off.
2011. The year everybody turned into a fucking comedian.
Not everyone my friend, not everyone.
A margin increase forthcoming for the S&P then?!
we are just taking our money out of his shithole country.
Which country were you referring to?
Which country was Berlusconi referring to?
Fixed it for you.
The betrayal... Et tu, Americay?
Friday Humor... eur/usd short covering?
voglio andare per una birra con lui. Fa bene con le donne.
Fist pumping guido... fight the beat.
Tenere la birra. Dammi solo le sue donne.
J/D e'well spoken. Keep posting.
Why doesn't Silvio get a loan from the Pope? They might as well own all of Italy again.
Hey, who's the pointy hatted guy over there in the "shadows"..
It's pretty obvious that you need to check out the meaning of the term buggery. Last I heard, it was an English thing. (PS Try the UK Foreign Minister)
There once was a bunga Prime Minister
Whose penchants were really quite sinister
When asked if she'd whined,
To reply he declined
Saying 'chi lo sa? I haven't quite finished her.'
FLOWmax
...like the chef at la cucina finding the fridge is out of tomaters. mucho pessimo
Tomatoes are not indigenous to Europe.
Neither are USDs. ;)
Can some one give me a 200 daily on the ( DXY )? I have simple under the (6) handle and a conflicting (6.25) handle.
Am I missing the simple/exponental train?
I give up. Who picks up those that can't make the simple train?
Not a site I like but easy to get to:
http://www.marketwatch.com/investing/index/dxy/charts?countrycode=us&cha...
75.51 simple 200 DMA
75.72 exp 200 DMA
Hope it helps...there is about 0.21 delta...much narrowed...and exp just went north of simple.
Thanks Jim. I was using ) http://www.forexpros.com/quotes/us-dollar-index-advanced-chart
'Fantastic Words, But...'
Fridat afternoon humor: Yo mama's so fat that when she fell in love she broke it
Yo mama's so fat she needs a GPS to find her a..hole!
did he say at one of his bunga bunga parties?
This is what was sent prem subscr 24 hours back
http://capital3x.com/?p=935
dollar come back reign
.
.
Faaaaaack dis shit.
Looks like my drinks cabinet is not up to the task in providing the necessary liquor to get by this friday night rolling to quench all the bad news and so i'm aheadin' to the tool shed to make an ol'fashion home wrecker......drink that is.
2qt paint stripper
4cl of diesel
3 tablespoons of caustic soda
1 handful of cement
1 squished black widow spider
Serving Suggestion.
Shake thoroughly and carefully and pour over the head of ya mother-in-law when ya see 'er.
3 measures of Gordon's Gin, 1 of Vodka, 1/2 a measure of Kina Ole, which is not Vermouth. Shaken well until it's ice cold. Then served with a large thin slice of lemon peel.
Cheers bro,i'll drink to that.
I am shaken by the fact that you don't want it stirred:)
Speaking of fucking ridonculous...looks like "someone" is holding the floor under BAC @ $7...hmmm, BAC beckons, come to me bail out afficionados and TBTF fans, come and ye shall all be made rich on sheeples backs.
Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet and a penitentiary?
A: One is filled with
tax evaders, blackmailers,
and threats to society.
The other is for housing prisoners.
--David Letterman
Liberals only have limited choices: a) blame Bush or b) blame global warming or c) blame any corporation.
I'll stick with blame the government (generally)....given its strong track record of inept, inefficient, self-aggrandizing, all-knowing, stifiling, liberty-stealing, know no bounds, redistributionist, power grabbing laws, rules and regulations.
Ahh yes, the ever easy short sighted target, the bwig bwad gwovewnment. Interesting that government is just a tool, like a gun, or a hammer. Either of those things can be used to steal life or liberty from someone, yet, we don't blame them, we blame the people behind them.
I wonder, could it be that having people raised in a capitalist society, where everyone is a "king" and is enticed into needing more and more, not only to keep the economy going, to keep the rich wealthy, and the poor on credit, but also to try and satisfy the emptiness inside of everyone. The emptiness that has been created by supporting social class/race divisions, encouraging selfishness, greed, and competition as the primary drivers for everyones motives....
Nah, it couldn't be that, it must be the government.
So government does not fan the flames of "social class/race divisions, encouraging selfishness, greed??" (e.g., the government loves to carve up people into classes -- look at any govt form, listen to any speech; who is more greedy than the governrment with never ending growth in spending -- even money they do not have!; government is beyond selfish - they are consumed with themselves; etc, etc.). There are greedy rich people and there are greedy poor people - government stokes the greed of poor people and seems to want to "punish" (a BHO word) those it deems to be rich (reportedly >$200,000 income).
Capitalism is not perfect - just better than the alternatives. Competition drives advances. Economic growth is not a zero sum game (i.e., for every "winner" there is a "loser"). Our bottom quartile "poor" are among the richest quartile in the world -- and not because of government. The government is not going to solve personal "emptiness." "The size of the federal budget is not an appropriate barometer of social conscience or charitable concern."
Some see no danger in the government on a continuous growth curve of taking power over lives (as has been the case for about 100 years). Others like me see it reaching a point where it is very harmful and want reduced government authority. Those on the left will disagree.
In the meantime, I will look to make money from the lurch towards the bigger government you crave, taking advantage of how it will harm our economy (like everyone else on this site). Then, hopefully, with the grace of God, I will have sufficient means to take care of my family, not be a burden on others (which folks seem to do without a second thought these days) and give away wealth to those in need. I encourage you to do the same.
Kinda funny coming from a guy whos top correlated search terms to his name are: scandal and prostitution.
Missed it by that much!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SDrqa-eTXU
Do weak ends exist?
Ma. Che cazzo fai. Questo fillio di puntana e una grande schemo. Minchia!
Your ? Mama is the satellite!
It is really funny. Don't these clowns know that most people with money are smart enough not to listen to politicians?
Actually we do listen. Once they quit denying there is a problem and start blaming someone else, then you know they are getting desperate.
I guess this gives Obama his next line about the economy.
i see dead sheeple
.
.