This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

Friday Funny: Sino Forest Seeks $4 Billion From Muddy Waters In Damages... As It Files For Bankruptcy

Tyler Durden's picture





 

Actually, in retrospect this may well be the funniest pair of headlines in one place ever.

  • SINO-FOREST TO FILE FOR BANKRUPTCY, MAY SEEK SALE OF COMPANY

But...

  • SINO FOREST SEEKING $4B IN DAMAGES AGAINST MUDDY WATERS

Uh? What? #Ref! #Ref! #Ref! We wonder: if Sino Forest files for bankruptcy in its forest of imaginary trees, did it really file for bankruptcy.

In other news, how many of the following analysts who had a buy on the stock as of the day the Muddy Waters report saved countless other investors the 100% certainty of a full wipe out by putting their money in Sino Forest, have been terminated.

The Following Sino Forest Sell-Side Analysts Should Be Terminated Immediately

As we pointed out the day after we broke the news that Paulson is about to suffer a historic loss on the Sino Forest Chinese fraud (a loss that has now been realized), the Paulson analyst who suggested this humiliating investment for the man who is now best known for hiring Paolo Pellegrini, have long since seen the pink slip. The story however does not end there: below we present again the sell side analysts who had Buy and Outperform ratings on what is now the biggest financial ponzi fraud since Madoff. In order to protect the reputation of such host firms as Raymond James, Dundee Securities, TD Newcrest, Credit Suisse, RBC, BMO and Scotia Capital, we urge the management teams to immediately terminate the following sell-side "analysts" whose work on TRE.TO was nothing but piggybacking on groupthink, doing absolutely no actual due diligence, costing clients billions in losses, and whose names will now forever be enshrined in the pantheon of "most worthless sellside analysts" ever.

TRE.TO analyst coverage as of June 3.

Funny how quick Kelertas changes his opinion on a topic in which he was absolutely certain as recently as 6 days ago:

Mr. Kelertas didn’t mince his words. From the get-go his goal was to explain “why Muddy Waters’ research is a pile of crap” and he went about his attack by addressing specific issues that Mr. Block has raised.

 

“All indications are that there are no fraudulent activities, no overstatements. We believe in the company. We trust the company after they have come through with various disclosures,” Mr. Kelertas said.

 

If Sino-Forest has done nothing wrong, why hasn’t its stock rebounded from its devastating drop? Mr. Kelertas has a theory. For starters, before the report was released, markets were already nervous because QE2 is winding down and there are fears of a Chinese economic slowdown. But more important, there was a growing short position in Sino-Forest’s stock so investors were primed to jump at anything overly negative. Plus, allegations of wrongdoing against China Forest Holdings Co. Ltd., another Chinese forest plantation operator, broke earlier this year, so investors had that weighing on their minds.

Or, and here's a thought, sellside analysts are worthless, piggybacking, groupthink-pursuing pieces of s....cum?

 


- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:41 | Link to Comment lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

Didn't BAC hold a boatload of shares from them??

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:56 | Link to Comment Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Did it use imaginary paper from the imaginary trees of its imaginary forests to file this imaginary suit?

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:43 | Link to Comment Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

What I don't understand is how did people ever believe there were trees left in China?  Hello, they are sneaking over the border into Siberia, paying off officials, and logging the shit out of the Taiga.  Is this news to people?  Let alone supposedly well-informed intelligent investors???

No trees in China = SinoForest is a scam.  Oh well, at least people know now!

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 18:35 | Link to Comment DorseyCecil68669
DorseyCecil68669's picture

my friend's aunt makes $72/hr on the internet. She has been without work for six months but last month her payment was $19183 just working on the internet for a few hours. Here's the site to read more .....  http://lazycash9.com

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 19:26 | Link to Comment Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

They sure did, but BAC is hiding this along with other financial problems so as to not have a bad financial situation.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:44 | Link to Comment g3h
g3h's picture

Good news: "90 percent of U.S. adults aged 15 and older describe themselves as being in good health"

Factbox: U.S. healthcare by numbers
http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/03/27/us-usa-court-healthcare-idUSBR...

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:05 | Link to Comment lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

89% are crazy.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:06 | Link to Comment Jason T
Jason T's picture

lol ..

"First in Good Health Self-Assessments - 90 percent of U.S. adults aged 15 and older describe themselves as being in good health versus an OECD average of 69.1 percent.

First in Obesity - More than one-third of American adults are obese, up from 15 percent in 1980."

No country for Thin Men.. lol
Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:15 | Link to Comment SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Obesity in america is due to welfare and food stamps.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 14:05 | Link to Comment overbet
overbet's picture

and genetically modified food

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:46 | Link to Comment Seorse Gorog fr...
Seorse Gorog from that Quantum Entanglement Fund. alright_.-'s picture

I see-no-forest.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:31 | Link to Comment Goldilocks
Goldilocks's picture

sometimes i wonder...
how fiat "vaporizes" when it didn’t really exist to begin with?

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:48 | Link to Comment Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

Oh sure, you raugh.

But we win rible suit.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:48 | Link to Comment fuu
fuu's picture

Mu.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:48 | Link to Comment SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Raymond James, lol douchebags.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:54 | Link to Comment WillyGroper
WillyGroper's picture

Didn't ANON expose their skullduggery by hacking them?

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:48 | Link to Comment Herd Redirectio...
Herd Redirection Committee's picture

All this talk of 'hacking'... Let me say that IMO a lot of the 'hacking' is insiders leaking information, but you can't admit that, because then people are looking for the mole, so instead 'we got hacked'.  Keep up the good work moles and hackers, we will bring the entire edifice down with time.  We just need to make up our minds as to what we want to replace it with!

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:54 | Link to Comment PaperBear
PaperBear's picture

Is Sino-Forest owned by an Obama donor and has Sino-Forest been given a government loan ?

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:55 | Link to Comment Dermasolarapate...
Dermasolarapaterraphatrima's picture

"... Raymond James, Dundee Securities, TD Newcrest, Credit Suisse, RBC, BMO and Scotia Capital..."

Just wondering how they can miss blantant fraud.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:55 | Link to Comment williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Looks like they can't see the forest from the bankruptcy.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:56 | Link to Comment bobola
bobola's picture

Tyler, thanks for this story.

Your reporting of Muddy Waters was spot on, as was their analasys.

 

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 12:59 | Link to Comment blu
blu's picture

Don't laugh. "Kill the messenger for money" will become the new business model for these kinds of frauds. I'll go out on a limb and predict that bottom-feeding lawyers and plutocrats will move in on the carcasses of these shell companies, buy them up for material rights, and use them as a front for endless lawsuits. It would be a good way for an inside player to exact some punishment from a goodie-two-shoes and prevent the next one from coming forward.

The PTB will not go down without a fight. And they fight always via the courts.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:03 | Link to Comment LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Yes, but now they will be fighting each other. Pass the popcorn.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:34 | Link to Comment blu
blu's picture

Then my whistle-blowing days are certainly over. Such as they were.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:05 | Link to Comment bobola
bobola's picture

"...An independent committee of Sino-Forest directors spent more than $50 million on an eight-month investigation. The committee published a report in January in which it said Sino- Forest may not be able to disprove some allegations as the information may not exist or be retrievable..."

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2012-03-30/sino-forest-to-file-for-bankruptcy-protection-in-canada.html

Information=trees

 

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 13:43 | Link to Comment JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

 

 

Or, and here's a thought, sellside analysts are worthless, piggybacking, groupthink-pursuing pieces of s....cum?

I Love You Bro!

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 14:08 | Link to Comment swissaustrian
swissaustrian's picture

Truth is treason in an empire of lies - Ron Paul

Muddy Waters ftw!

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 14:15 | Link to Comment Stroke
Stroke's picture

That is my laugh of the fucking day..,.......Ha!

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 14:16 | Link to Comment Stroke
Stroke's picture

Oh Yea....FTW!

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 14:20 | Link to Comment Blue Horshoe Lo...
Blue Horshoe Loves Annacott Steel's picture

Why is Sino-Forest seeking damages from an old blues musician?

Sat, 03/31/2012 - 01:55 | Link to Comment StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

His mojo is working, theirs ain't! :>D

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 14:23 | Link to Comment Blue Horshoe Lo...
Blue Horshoe Loves Annacott Steel's picture

"First in Good Health Self-Assessments -

90 percent of U.S. adults aged 15 and older describe themselves as being in good health = 90 percent of adults aged 15 and older are delusional & should seek help".

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 14:28 | Link to Comment yogibear
yogibear's picture

LOL, get invetors to load up, pull the money/cash  out and offhore it, then bankrupt it. Fraud makes some very wealthy people.

THe SEC's policy is to watch porn and look the other way with fraud in the major corporations. Cook the books, make your company look good and run it into the ground.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 14:40 | Link to Comment Head_Shots_Work
Head_Shots_Work's picture

Ha ha - jokes on them - old Muddy died back in '83. Plus those English pricks took all his money from his songs "Rollin' Stone", "Mannish Boy", and all.

Oh - not that Muddy? Well - they have about the same chance of getting 4B from either.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 15:18 | Link to Comment Scalaris
Scalaris's picture

Advice to Sino Forest: since the whole operation was yet another ponzathon, there's a better chance to get some money if they start operating Sino Forest through zynga games, and do the whole forestry biz in the virtual realm, while charging zynga dollars and perhaps IPO on a virtual market.

Fri, 03/30/2012 - 16:03 | Link to Comment weltvermesser
weltvermesser's picture

They should have announced some sort of joint venture with $AAPL for wodden iphones (very good for all those sustainability hippsters) and place some apps as colletral. non need to file for chapter11 then, but up to a trillion in marketcap.

ask me next time, or phone bernie @ 001 jailhouserock

Sat, 03/31/2012 - 01:57 | Link to Comment StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Now here's a creatific thinkerizer! :>D

Sat, 03/31/2012 - 07:21 | Link to Comment overmedicatedun...
overmedicatedundersexed's picture

how many more sino forests are out there hopped up on sell side rec's..a much larger forest than sino ever had,  me thinks

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!