Friday Humor: "I Am Pledging To Cut The Deficit We Inherited By Half By The End Of My First Term In Office"

Tyler Durden's picture

President Obama, February 2009

"We can not and will not sustain deficits like these without end. Contrary to the prevailing wisdom in Washington these past few years, we can not simply spend as we please and defer the consequences to the next budget, the next administration or the next generation. We are paying the price for these deficits right now. In 2008 alone we paid $250 billion in interest on our debt, that is more than three times what we spent on education that year, more than seven times what we spent on VA healthcare. So if we confront this crisis without also confronting the deficits that helped cause it, we risk sinking into another crisis down the road as our interest payments rise, our obligations come due, confidence in our economy erodes and our children and grandchildren are unable to pursue their dreams because they are saddled with our debts. That's why today I am pledging to cut the deficit we inherited by half by the end of my first term in office. This will not be easy - it will require us to make difficult decisions and face challenges we have long neglected but i refuse to leave our children with a debt they can not repay. And that means taking responsibility right now in this administration, for getting our spending under control."

Less than archive footage:

US deficit:

US debt:

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FOC 1183's picture

He didn't build that deficit.  Someone else made that happen

MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

It's so cool that Michelle Obama is getting involved in the Olympics and teaching kids to eat healthy and get fit! This is what the Olympic spirit is a about - important world leaders getting down to earth and speaking to the people from their hearts. I am humbled that our government is going above and beyond their statutory duties and taking an interest in people's health. This is going to kickstart a revolution in healthy eating. 

spastic_colon's picture

especially when healthy food at the grocery store costs 10 times more than a big mac!

nope-1004's picture

So Obammy is full of shit?

Huh.... who would have guessed that?


TruthInSunshine's picture

Wow, good work ZH.

This gem is incredible and shows the utter and complete failure of Obama's pledge regarding spending even more so than the speech he gave in 2006 as a Senator, and he doesn't have the cover of not knowing the extent of the financial and economic crisis we would be in when he made it, as he made this pledge during the height of the financial and fiscal crisis.

The gap between what Obama pledged and what he has done is larger than any POTUS that I can recall.

I make this statement fully convinced that the two party system in the United States is a true illusion of choice, and represents a false left-right paradigm, whereby both parties are financed and work for the same exact people and institutions, and only use social wedge issues du jour to distract and lull the electorate into the belief  that the two parties are different in any significant respect.

economics9698's picture

Thanks MDB I needed a good laugh.

francis_sawyer's picture

I pledge to grow 'magic okra' in the White House Garden for health...

That's the kind that grows itself during the July~August months while I'm in Spain with 3 dozen of my BFN's, then, magically harvests itself & jumps into Tiffany boxes to hand out to foreign wife dignitaries so that their asses can become as shapely as mine (as illustrated here)...


engineertheeconomy's picture

Engineered economic collapse and subsequent Martial Law/civil war will continue as planned regardless of who is the Puppet and who oils the printing press bearings. You will be assimilated

Colombian Gringo's picture

Obamas promise to cut the deficit by half is proof that he has a sense of humor. The sad part is that the joke is on the american people who will pay more taxes to receive less. Revolution Bitchez!

malikai's picture

There are no revolutions. There are only reversions.

strannick's picture

Obama is black therefore he represents working people. We dont even need debates.

iDealMeat's picture

Jesus H. Christ..  What part of "Stop shopping at retail do y'all not understand..???"

You want this crap to end??.  Then STOP.!.  Every time you buy some useless shit at retail

you condone the intl. corp slave machine...  Every time you buy some useless shit at retail

you pay TAX!!..


STOP!  as in fucking  just STOP!!!

Michael's picture

Government Silently Positions for Martial Law as Financial Collapse Arrives in America

Santilli explains that his knowledge of Rex 84 provides that within the document, one of the scenarios that would cause a complete suspension of the US Constitution, Bill of Rights and implement martial law would be a financial collapse. He says once the collapse occurs, the US government and defense agencies estimate they have a 72 hour window to activate all procedures to ensure continuity of government as well as a lockdown of the general population as civilian unrest, riots and outbreaks of violence are anticipated.

A source in the Deutsche Bank claims that in 2008 our financial and monetary system completely collapsed and since that time the banking cartels have been “propping up the system” to make it appear as if everything was fine. In reality our stock market and monetary systems are fake; meaning that there is nothing holding them in place except the illusion that they have stabilized since the Stock Market Crash nearly 5 years ago.

Since this time, the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) in conjunction with FEMA and other federal agencies have been quickly working to set in place their directives of control under a silent martial law.

The Deutsche Bank informant says that the cause for the bailout of the banks was a large sum of cash needed quickly to repay China who had purchased large quantities of mortgage-backed securities that went belly-up when the global scam was realized. When China realized that they had been duped into buying worthless securitized loans which would never be repaid, they demanded the actual property instead. The Chinese were prepared to send their “people” to American shores to seize property as allocated to them through the securitized loan contracts.

TruthInSunshine's picture

Being cynical and inherently skeptical of government intentions as I am, I love a good conspiracy as much as anyone, but, and this is not intended to offend you or directed at you personally, that article reads like something written under the influence of waaaay too much chronic, or by the Department of Homeland Dis-Information in order to portray anyone advocating that government agencies are anything other than completely benevolent is batshit crazy.

When China realized that they had been duped into buying worthless securitized loans which would never be repaid, they demanded the actual property instead. The Chinese were prepared to send their “people” to American shores to seize property as allocated to them through the securitized loan contracts.





Michael's picture

 It makes sense to me as alphabet soup agencies are all playing secret agent man these days, and the 750 million hollow point bullets the government recently purchased to use on American civilians is telling.

Bloodstock's picture

My guess is that the American public owns a sizable amount of bullets as well, so,,,,,,

Western's picture

You're right, that means that there is no martial law and that we should all go buy mcdonalds happy meals and forget about everything.


whoops, no need to actually load those bullets and prepare mentally for a fight!

Bloodstock's picture

Lol, not exactly. Face the facts. The U.S. Government can't keep track of anything except chosen data. With this many bullets laying around, there are reasons for them coming up missing including black market sales, bartering etc. Yes it is a hell of a number but not all of the military and/or police departments, sheriffs, etc., will go along with the insanity of betrayal to the U. S. Constitution and WILL play a large role in a revolution, probably confiscating millions of rounds for the good guys. It is always wise to be aware of the surrounding but to give up hope is not something that I will be party to. Guess we're going to see what happens.

Element's picture

Come on, he's just mis-spoke ... happens all the time ...

And you're not even supposed to be paying attention.

Disenchanted's picture



"that article reads like something written under the influence of waaaay too much chronic"


Read this one then...from August 5, 2000 re: Operation Garden Plot:


Or read the Miami Herald article("REAGAN AIDES AND THE 'SECRET' GOVERNMENT") from July 1987 that's reproduced here(scroll down):


other tidbits here:


Garden Plot & Rex 84
Vic Vinegar's picture

Way to knock my socks off, spacemonkey!  Rex 84 makes me think of this little ditty by Tammy Wynette and Tom T Hall

Disenchanted's picture



little pukes like you are part of the fucking problem...


"lets just put all this(criminality and corruption) behind us and move on, move forward," or whatever/however it's expressed.


I've turned on my special ZH douchebag filter, so your pathetic apologetic posts and paens to Pollyannas everywhere will no longer register on my screen.


Jesus H. Christ you really think that markets/financials/economics/Wall Street/banking and politics/geopolitics are two completely disconnected subjects? Because that's the vibe I'm getting.


Speaking of spacemonkeys...Your obsession with little robot pop music whores is slightly unnerving. But you'd probably like Mikkie from the group Vintage of Russia: (trust me the little robot whore video is there within that link, plus a few others ;)


good day Apparatchik of the Failed USA status quo party...(btw I find the likes of you and nmewn to be good comrades in that all inclusive party)

Vic Vinegar's picture

Little pukes like me are part of the problem.  

If only you'd get a few more greens while doing nothing about nothing, then we'd get somewhere!

I'm totally not interacting with morons and/or gov't trolls!  Reading ZH is a good use of time

Gift Whores's picture

I try to buy my ammo at wholesale.

Or reload it myself.'s picture

"I like my species the way it is." -- Lt. Worf

Vic Vinegar's picture

Not me.  Put me in the pro-transhumanism camp.  Man has to move forward, bitches.

This is actually a genuine comment.  Until then, the trolling only gets worse.  

JDRose1984 - I feel you!

GetZeeGold's picture



OK...we're sorry.


Anything else?




Al Gorerhythm's picture

Hey Michelle, just try growing a people's garden on the verge in front of the WH. The militarized, code violation police from city council would soon have that uprooted and your home surrounded by thought police. Wait a sec, that is the case already.

Al Gorerhythm's picture

How many pledges does it take to buy a president?

How many pledges does it take to buy a nation. 

How many pledges does it take to swear your oath of office?

Muppet of the Universe's picture

He can still fulfill his promise! MONETIZE THE DEBT BRO.  SUDDEN DEATH ENDGAME.

Goner's picture

Another option is we simply change the way we calculate the debt. This is a time tested Govemenment method (or banking) to meet goals. Move liabilties from one column over to the asset side and poof ... the national debt is gone. Of course we still owe 16 Trillion, but that debt is now an asset!

Or hire Corzine to make it vaporise, in exchange we let him off the hook for all the criminal charges currently pending and commute his current prison term. I assume this would be a good deal for him as the law must be all over him


Zero Debt's picture

The appropriate response should state that the deficit is an outcome and not a decision variable, it emanates from revenues and expenses, and expenses itself are consequences of the ambition and scope of activities carried out and promises made. Thus, cutting a deficit requires reducing the ambition of the government, its scope of activities, giving up on the promises it has made, which at this point means breaking a lot of promises, and stopping to make new promises and keeping its ambitions and activities limited.

But reaching a consensus for this requires an attitude shift. To reduce central government scope and ambition requires a different view that favors, encourages, cheers for and supports people and organizationss with vastly different attributes in a society: Decentralization, self-sufficiency, resilience, autonomy, awareness, alertness, positive attitudes to entrepreneurs and trade based on sound money with the risk of failure and pushing responsibility back to a local level in all matters of importance: health care, education, law enforcement, industry policy, agriculture, the list goes on.

To avoid doing this requires the combined skills of a pathological liar that can continue to extend promises as well an overly ambitious mentality with high charisma that can convince voters to approve of overly ambitious grand schemes and plans and government-sponsored activities, such as deficit-driving wars and deficit-driving welfare. This profile fits Obama's skill set exactly. He represents the secret wish of many voters: they want to be lied to, they want to believe in eternal promises, grand plans and be taken care of so they can stop being alert.

Watauga's picture

In which speech did he blabber that if he failed to cut the deficit in half then he SHOULD BE a ONE TERM PRESIDENT?

JohnKozac's picture

"Follow the leaer" is what I see more and more people doing. Don't pay for anything---mortgages, credit cards, doctors bills---just put it on credit (or a loan) and then follow the leaders and don;t pay it off.

It's an infection from the top doan that is changing our "work ethic" culture. Long term looks dismal if leaders and the people who follwo them, go this path. Just another eason why house prices will continue to plunge.....

House too old---walk away;

...don't like your mortgage----just walk away;

move for a job---walk away, forget that old neighborhood;


..and so on....bleak-to-dismal is my forecast.


HamFistedIdiot's picture

Zero Debt -

We can start with the bloat at the Department of Homeland Security, that as of Feb 2010 has nearly 400,000 employees, 12,000 of whom make in excess of $150K per year. I wish Ron Paul stayed in the game and fought the good fight. Will Gary Johnson (libertarian pres candidate) do the job of eliminating half of the alphabet agencies and departments that are bleeding our nation dry? No wonder the feds borrow 40¢ of every dollar they spend. I think they're going to borrow till the whole thing collapses; but it's not going to be allowed to collapse until enough people and businesses are either bankrupt or on the government dole and under their control.

Then the fascists can get on with their depopulation agenda, while blaming everything on the free market that never was -- or on the rural white guy with a gun who wouldn't know a credit default instrument (ie the banker death star built to destroy the planet's economic system born in the City of London) if it stared him in the face.

Widowmaker's picture

"...the free market that never was."

This is all that matters.  Every turd of bullshit stems from this fact.


uncle_vito's picture

Not nice to make fun of Michelle.  She cannot help it.

engineertheeconomy's picture


Vic Vinegar's picture

why don't you do it, sweetie-pie?

GetZeeGold's picture



Howza bout no one does it. Go preach to someone else. I'm done.



Vic Vinegar's picture

And people why many of the more intelligent commenters have left this site.  LOL

Me - I'm just dumb, bored and lack hobbies.  I actually respond to a comment that supposedly wonders why someone doesn't do something.  But then again, I appreciate irony, too.

Tyler - your site is a fuking joke.  I have great respect for you (seriously) but if you cannot see my agenda vs. the rest, then so it goes.  Kick somebody out or the trolling continues.  

Take no hostages!

engineertheeconomy's picture

Just kick yourself out you stupid troll

Roandavid's picture

Milliondollarboner is my new hero.

Vic Vinegar's picture

Why not threadjack here?

Sure buddy.

  • to widen the scope of financial, economic and political information available to the professional investing public.
  • to skeptically examine and, where necessary, attack the flaccid institution that financial journalism has become.
  • to liberate oppressed knowledge.
  • to provide analysis uninhibited by political constraint.
  • to facilitate information's unending quest for freedom.
  • to keep abreast of the most popular Katy Perry videos.


Which of these is not like the other?  More importantly, which of these matters?

Vic Vinegar's picture

and yes the threadjacking will continue until Tyler makes his choice, Bachellorete-style.  

We all gotta choose.  

Disenchanted's picture



Hopefully the choice will be cutting lickspittles who post way too many KP videos...



lickspittle Definition lick·spit·tle [ lík spìtt'l ] lick·spit·tles Plural NOUN  1.  toady: somebody who shows undue deference toward social superiors or powerful people ( literary ) (my edit to this definition:) 2. Vic Vinegar
Vic Vinegar's picture

How do you log onto this site and type "Disenchanted" with a straight face?  More dignity would come from a userid of "Jerry Sandusky's Tuesday afternoon hard-on".  

Just a thought, no?

But per the agenda...let's keep people from staying on topic or talking about making things better.  I get it.

GetZeeGold's picture



I get it.


I don't think you do actually.