Guest Post: Poor Thieves Go To Jail, Rich Thieves Don’t

Tyler Durden's picture


Submitted by John Aziz of Azizonomics,

This is more surreal than Barack “I’ll Bomb Ya” Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize.

From the Mail:

A bank clerk who dreamed of becoming a model stole £46,000 from the tills — and spent it on plastic surgery and shopping sprees.


Rachael Claire Martin, 24, used the cash to fund a boob job, dental work and liposuction, as well as hair extensions and nights out.


She took thousands at a time from her Barclays branch in Liskeard, Cornwall, in an eight-week period.


Martin initially denied 25 counts of theft in 2010.


But on what should have been the first day of a week-long trial, she admitted a single charge of theft covering the full amount of £46,000.

Steal thousands from a bank? You face criminal charges, a trial and jail time.

When that same bank manipulates a $600 trillion market by rigging the LIBOR rate for profit? No criminal charges, no trial, no jail time.

In a better world people who rob a company engaged in a manipulative criminal enterprise like LIBOR-rigging would not face criminal charges. There is a case that this girl should be treated as a hero. In stealing the money, she was just getting back a tiny fraction of the money that Barclays stole by rigging LIBOR. And by spending the money at least she gave the money back to the public instead of stashing it away in the Cayman Islands.

I hope she achieves her dream of becoming a model. And I hope the LIBOR-riggers spend a very long time in jail — but in reality there’s not much chance of that.

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Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:33 | 2630582 Buck Johnson
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I know you can, but she's really hot. 

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 23:39 | 2630720 Bananamerican
Bananamerican's picture


she looks like a shallow Hobbit with trout lips packing plastic=dumbsex.

Do you also like those plastic blow-up orifice dolls?


Thu, 07/19/2012 - 00:32 | 2630794 MsCreant
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Thanks Bananamerican. She makes me sad. She does not have model potential, and honestly that is okay. 

At least she had reasoning that most of us could understand. In this culture, women are told that is where their power is. It looked like a way to better things.

What was Lloyd and Jamie's excuse? They weren't making enough money? They did not have enough power? Jail is too good for them. 

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 01:07 | 2630829 Bananamerican
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like Flacon quoted above "A really efficient totalitarian state would be one in which the all-powerful executive ...control a population of slaves who do not have to be coerced, because they love their servitude.”

That goes to the sex scam perpetrated on american little girls for the last 15 years...

"Be like Brittany, be like Christina! Be a whore. It's not degrading! Be an Orifice! It's Empowering™!!

That dumb English girl STOLE to participate in her own Objectification and to fullfill another debased global Marketing con. The Empowered Whore™

Those "boobs" are as emblematic of our Empty bullshit times as Tats and the last 12 years of amerikan political/financial "leadership"

We are so numbed to our own existence that we reach out for the "Transgressive™" to feel feel ANYTHING

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 01:13 | 2630845 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

Masculinity is DEAD. Femininity is DEAD.

Pimps and Ho's baby. That and a Webcam is the future it seems...

Well said all around BananaAm and Ms.C. Sad state of Affairs.



Thu, 07/19/2012 - 01:25 | 2630851 Vic Vinegar
Vic Vinegar's picture

Masculinity is DEAD. Femininity is DEAD.

Get into the topic of sex and gender roles buddy and you are entering a house of mirrors, where somebody is going to be there at every turn waiting for you and it's going to end with you showing your insecurities to all.

Better to stick with comments re: $ or macro-trends, O-dog.  No one needs to hear about your sexual hangups.  LOL

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 03:05 | 2630910 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

Vic, I like you in-spite of who you are.

Carry on commenting on whatever you feel called to comment on. No one is judgng you. 

Anyway the best one can do is judge your avaatar, which is a woman.



Thu, 07/19/2012 - 07:50 | 2631107 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

As in fishing, the kind of bait you use will help determine the kind of fish you catch.  Further, some fish (in particular, the bottom feeders) will hit on anything.  Pathetic really.   She is the female embodiment of Jamie Dimon.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:47 | 2630608 Id fight Gandhi
Id fight Gandhi's picture

Dude, you don't want to land there.
Her tattoo budget must be through the roof.

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 09:03 | 2631344 Zymurguy
Zymurguy's picture

Landing strip?

I like to refer to it as a "treasure trail"

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 09:23 | 2631454 GMadScientist
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Pussy Mohawk.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:29 | 2630576 eatthebanksters
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$600 trillion will buy a lot of nice tits...

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 23:45 | 2630734 Sabibaby
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a lot of fembots too!

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 23:17 | 2630677 Tarheel
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fuck the OWS hippies, rapists, convicts and Libtards

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 23:40 | 2630724 Bananamerican
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no, Fuck YOU, Lloyd B.

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 02:04 | 2630880 cpzimmon
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Hey nick, why'd you get the down arrows? Some kind of negitive code in Hubba hubba?

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 06:13 | 2631004 Strange-Currencies
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Bunga Bunga

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 21:54 | 2630479 fuu
fuu's picture

"In a better world people who rob a company engaged in a manipulative criminal enterprise like LIBOR-rigging would not face criminal charges."


Wed, 07/18/2012 - 21:55 | 2630485 Ancona
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Perfect. No additional comment.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 21:57 | 2630495 tmosley
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Seems like her theft was for the public good.  Let's just call it a "tax".

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:08 | 2630523 JamesBond
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but only after we first say it isn't a tax



Wed, 07/18/2012 - 21:58 | 2630499 Shizzmoney
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At least the money she stole went back into the community.

I'd make a deposit in her anytime.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 21:59 | 2630501 Chuck Walla
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Hey, doesn't the one percent play golf with Barack?

Forward, Soviet!

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 21:58 | 2630502 Timmay
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Hairy bush or racing stripe?

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 09:24 | 2631457 GMadScientist
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Who cares? Work the Nair and waxing into the act.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 21:59 | 2630503 q99x2
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Thems some hooters. She should have put it in the mattress instead.

During the collapse there will be rewards for banksters. I guess there already is a reward for the one bankster from Iceland.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 21:59 | 2630504 Ineverslice
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Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:10 | 2630525 JamesBond
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investors should at least be able to see what they paid for...

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:24 | 2630564 tmosley
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Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:05 | 2630515 Crab Cake
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Laws have nothing to do with justice, theyre there just to keep the little people in line; its as simple as that.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:10 | 2630526 Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

She did not steal it, she just borrowed a little bit of clients money to bolster her assets. Completely legal, you could just ask Corzine's lawyers.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:53 | 2630621 BidnessMan
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Rehypothecation.  Borrowed some assets to leverage her assets. She was going to pay it back as soon as the modeling contract came in.

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 00:04 | 2630765 12ToothAssassin
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You two should be her defense team

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 17:31 | 2633791 Bunga Bunga
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Finally I understand the financial term "Derivatits".

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 23:02 | 2630635 Real Estate Geek
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Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:11 | 2630529 optionking
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she should get a refund on the plastic surgery, apparently S&M equipment ain't cheap

nothing says I'm a victim like whips and chains.

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 00:47 | 2630810 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

She is on a bench that you do bench presses on. Those look like bracelets, not cuffs, though I agree that her pose is suggestive of bondage.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:11 | 2630530 hustler etiquette
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because boobs

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:13 | 2630534 otto skorzeny
otto skorzeny's picture

scabby-you'll get the drips from dipping it in that panty pot

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 23:01 | 2630637 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

You need to eat it so you can see what's in it.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:21 | 2630554 Theos
Theos's picture

Dumb bitch should have rev-repo'd her boobs with a 50 year duration. No problem! Dem titties will still be good by then.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:22 | 2630558 yogibear
yogibear's picture

Angello Mozilo, of Countywide laughed all the way to the bank. Corzine las already slipped away.



Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:23 | 2630559 runlevel
runlevel's picture

i dont see the link to the unsensored pic in the comments.. the fuck

Thu, 07/19/2012 - 07:51 | 2631108 Broomer
Broomer's picture

But it is there.

cites a link and there (in Spanish),

You can see the photos of Rachael Claire Martin naked breasts uncensored at (Rachael Claire nude)




Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:25 | 2630566 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Nothing will change until the people stand up and say enough!

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:28 | 2630568 EvlTheCat
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The plastic Barbie doll was just trying to stimulate your economy?  You guys are just soar because, for a bit, you got beat at your own game.  Sad really.  I think you should be proud of your own creation.  Dr. Frankenstein was.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:27 | 2630570 FuzzyDunlop21
FuzzyDunlop21's picture

How ironic. This is literally what Alanis Moriessette was singing about

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:33 | 2630585 Lore
Lore's picture



Boob Job = FRAUD! 

Anybody else smell a good metaphor, something about appearances and manipulation and messing with Mother Nature?

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:40 | 2630596 monad
monad's picture

If she didn't get caught they'd promote her to the top. She's got the right stuff.

Wed, 07/18/2012 - 22:49 | 2630611 adr
adr's picture

What she forgot was the middle man. She needed to funnel the stolen money through an intermediary so that her hands were clean. Stealing directly from someone is certainly a crime. "Borrowing" hundreds of billions at less than .5% interest to plow into worthless equities, to pump the price up so you can unload the shares a few minutes later and keep the profit while repaying the loan in full, is just business as usual.

She should have immediately shot some porn and paid back the 46k pounds to the till before anyone knew it was gone. Then it would have been a loan. Any extra money above the 46k would be hers to keep. That is the way the stock market works. Poor girl, working for a bank she should have known better.

Also in the legalized theft department, what the fuck is going on with Nike. They report disaster earnings and the stock plummets, BTFD at the stock is up more than $10 in a week and a half. Did Nike's business have a miraculous turnaround in a couple weeks?

Bankrupt cities and millions of homes in shadow inventories mean REITs should trade through the roof. Massive economic slowdown in China means commodities should also hitch a rocket ride though the stratosphere. Building permits rising, while finished construction craters means homebuilder stocks should double in six months?

The lunacy is so expansive that every nuthouse on the planet wouldn't be able to contain it.

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