Guest Post: Poor Thieves Go To Jail, Rich Thieves Don’t

Tyler Durden's picture

Submitted by John Aziz of Azizonomics,

This is more surreal than Barack “I’ll Bomb Ya” Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize.

From the Mail:

A bank clerk who dreamed of becoming a model stole £46,000 from the tills — and spent it on plastic surgery and shopping sprees.


Rachael Claire Martin, 24, used the cash to fund a boob job, dental work and liposuction, as well as hair extensions and nights out.


She took thousands at a time from her Barclays branch in Liskeard, Cornwall, in an eight-week period.


Martin initially denied 25 counts of theft in 2010.


But on what should have been the first day of a week-long trial, she admitted a single charge of theft covering the full amount of £46,000.

Steal thousands from a bank? You face criminal charges, a trial and jail time.

When that same bank manipulates a $600 trillion market by rigging the LIBOR rate for profit? No criminal charges, no trial, no jail time.

In a better world people who rob a company engaged in a manipulative criminal enterprise like LIBOR-rigging would not face criminal charges. There is a case that this girl should be treated as a hero. In stealing the money, she was just getting back a tiny fraction of the money that Barclays stole by rigging LIBOR. And by spending the money at least she gave the money back to the public instead of stashing it away in the Cayman Islands.

I hope she achieves her dream of becoming a model. And I hope the LIBOR-riggers spend a very long time in jail — but in reality there’s not much chance of that.

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Buck Johnson's picture

I know you can, but she's really hot. 

Bananamerican's picture


she looks like a shallow Hobbit with trout lips packing plastic=dumbsex.

Do you also like those plastic blow-up orifice dolls?


MsCreant's picture

Thanks Bananamerican. She makes me sad. She does not have model potential, and honestly that is okay. 

At least she had reasoning that most of us could understand. In this culture, women are told that is where their power is. It looked like a way to better things.

What was Lloyd and Jamie's excuse? They weren't making enough money? They did not have enough power? Jail is too good for them. 

Bananamerican's picture

like Flacon quoted above "A really efficient totalitarian state would be one in which the all-powerful executive ...control a population of slaves who do not have to be coerced, because they love their servitude.”

That goes to the sex scam perpetrated on american little girls for the last 15 years...

"Be like Brittany, be like Christina! Be a whore. It's not degrading! Be an Orifice! It's Empowering™!!

That dumb English girl STOLE to participate in her own Objectification and to fullfill another debased global Marketing con. The Empowered Whore™

Those "boobs" are as emblematic of our Empty bullshit times as Tats and the last 12 years of amerikan political/financial "leadership"

We are so numbed to our own existence that we reach out for the "Transgressive™" to feel feel ANYTHING

Oh regional Indian's picture

Masculinity is DEAD. Femininity is DEAD.

Pimps and Ho's baby. That and a Webcam is the future it seems...

Well said all around BananaAm and Ms.C. Sad state of Affairs.



Vic Vinegar's picture

Masculinity is DEAD. Femininity is DEAD.

Get into the topic of sex and gender roles buddy and you are entering a house of mirrors, where somebody is going to be there at every turn waiting for you and it's going to end with you showing your insecurities to all.

Better to stick with comments re: $ or macro-trends, O-dog.  No one needs to hear about your sexual hangups.  LOL

Oh regional Indian's picture

Vic, I like you in-spite of who you are.

Carry on commenting on whatever you feel called to comment on. No one is judgng you. 

Anyway the best one can do is judge your avaatar, which is a woman.



Miss Expectations's picture

As in fishing, the kind of bait you use will help determine the kind of fish you catch.  Further, some fish (in particular, the bottom feeders) will hit on anything.  Pathetic really.   She is the female embodiment of Jamie Dimon.

Id fight Gandhi's picture

Dude, you don't want to land there.
Her tattoo budget must be through the roof.

Zymurguy's picture

Landing strip?

I like to refer to it as a "treasure trail"

eatthebanksters's picture

$600 trillion will buy a lot of nice tits...

Tarheel's picture

fuck the OWS hippies, rapists, convicts and Libtards

cpzimmon's picture

Hey nick, why'd you get the down arrows? Some kind of negitive code in Hubba hubba?

fuu's picture

"In a better world people who rob a company engaged in a manipulative criminal enterprise like LIBOR-rigging would not face criminal charges."


Ancona's picture

Perfect. No additional comment.

tmosley's picture

Seems like her theft was for the public good.  Let's just call it a "tax".

JamesBond's picture

but only after we first say it isn't a tax



Shizzmoney's picture

At least the money she stole went back into the community.

I'd make a deposit in her anytime.

Chuck Walla's picture

Hey, doesn't the one percent play golf with Barack?

Forward, Soviet!

Timmay's picture

Hairy bush or racing stripe?

GMadScientist's picture

Who cares? Work the Nair and waxing into the act.

q99x2's picture

Thems some hooters. She should have put it in the mattress instead.

During the collapse there will be rewards for banksters. I guess there already is a reward for the one bankster from Iceland.

JamesBond's picture

investors should at least be able to see what they paid for...

Crab Cake's picture

Laws have nothing to do with justice, theyre there just to keep the little people in line; its as simple as that.

Bunga Bunga's picture

She did not steal it, she just borrowed a little bit of clients money to bolster her assets. Completely legal, you could just ask Corzine's lawyers.

BidnessMan's picture

Rehypothecation.  Borrowed some assets to leverage her assets. She was going to pay it back as soon as the modeling contract came in.

12ToothAssassin's picture

You two should be her defense team

Bunga Bunga's picture

Finally I understand the financial term "Derivatits".

optionking's picture

she should get a refund on the plastic surgery, apparently S&M equipment ain't cheap

nothing says I'm a victim like whips and chains.

MsCreant's picture

She is on a bench that you do bench presses on. Those look like bracelets, not cuffs, though I agree that her pose is suggestive of bondage.

otto skorzeny's picture

scabby-you'll get the drips from dipping it in that panty pot

A Lunatic's picture

You need to eat it so you can see what's in it.

Theos's picture

Dumb bitch should have rev-repo'd her boobs with a 50 year duration. No problem! Dem titties will still be good by then.

yogibear's picture

Angello Mozilo, of Countywide laughed all the way to the bank. Corzine las already slipped away.



runlevel's picture

i dont see the link to the unsensored pic in the comments.. the fuck

Broomer's picture

But it is there.

cites a link and there (in Spanish),

You can see the photos of Rachael Claire Martin naked breasts uncensored at (Rachael Claire nude)




Dr. Engali's picture

Nothing will change until the people stand up and say enough!

EvlTheCat's picture

The plastic Barbie doll was just trying to stimulate your economy?  You guys are just soar because, for a bit, you got beat at your own game.  Sad really.  I think you should be proud of your own creation.  Dr. Frankenstein was.

FuzzyDunlop21's picture

How ironic. This is literally what Alanis Moriessette was singing about

Lore's picture



Boob Job = FRAUD! 

Anybody else smell a good metaphor, something about appearances and manipulation and messing with Mother Nature?

monad's picture

If she didn't get caught they'd promote her to the top. She's got the right stuff.

adr's picture

What she forgot was the middle man. She needed to funnel the stolen money through an intermediary so that her hands were clean. Stealing directly from someone is certainly a crime. "Borrowing" hundreds of billions at less than .5% interest to plow into worthless equities, to pump the price up so you can unload the shares a few minutes later and keep the profit while repaying the loan in full, is just business as usual.

She should have immediately shot some porn and paid back the 46k pounds to the till before anyone knew it was gone. Then it would have been a loan. Any extra money above the 46k would be hers to keep. That is the way the stock market works. Poor girl, working for a bank she should have known better.

Also in the legalized theft department, what the fuck is going on with Nike. They report disaster earnings and the stock plummets, BTFD at the stock is up more than $10 in a week and a half. Did Nike's business have a miraculous turnaround in a couple weeks?

Bankrupt cities and millions of homes in shadow inventories mean REITs should trade through the roof. Massive economic slowdown in China means commodities should also hitch a rocket ride though the stratosphere. Building permits rising, while finished construction craters means homebuilder stocks should double in six months?

The lunacy is so expansive that every nuthouse on the planet wouldn't be able to contain it.