Italy's Unelected PM Mario Monti: "Eurobonds, Or I Resign"

Tyler Durden's picture

Update: According to subsequent press reports, Monty has denied he threatened to resign. i.e., Monti just blinked. So now it is up to Merkel who will either have a very short life, or Monti will have to come up with a different professional suicide gambit.

Just when we thought the European drama couldn't get any more poignant following Merkel's statement earlier which boils down to "No eurobonds or death", here comes Italy's unelected PM and former Goldmanite, Mario Monti, threatening that the beggar will pull the trigger on his own political career if he is not allowed to be a chooser. From Il Giornale: "If the Chancellor does not give up I will tell you that I resign because if things do not change are not able to bring Italy out of the abyss", he suggested relying on the bogeyman of the crisis that would bring Italy under attack of speculators. On the other hand, Merkel knows all too well that the fall of Rome would mean the collapse of the definitive ' euros by prospects that would put the shivers even in Berlin." So one hand for Merkel Eurobonds are a matter of life or death, while an elected technocrat with no leverage at all, threatens to quit. Our money is on the German.

One person who we are quite certain would be delighted if Merkel were to call Monti's bluff, is none other than everyone's favorite Bunga Bunga specialist: Silvio Berlusconi.

After all the plane has obviously crashed into the mountain. Might as well make the last few hours entertaining.

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sbenard's picture

Go ahead! Make my day, Mario! Resign!!

silver500's picture

Next, Eurobonds or the world ends...

HelluvaEngineer's picture

NATO tanks in the streets, bitchez!

knukles's picture

Just say no!

Hold that man to that promise.

Just like we shoulda held all the uberliberals to their promise to leave the US if Bush was elected and all the neo-cons to leave if Obama was elected.
Send 'em to MarioLand

Colombian Gringo's picture

Monti threatening to Resign?


Go one better and hump off a building, you Fucker!

francis_sawyer's picture

Freeze! Or the dummy gets it!... I didn't realize Monti was a ventriliquist...

11b40's picture

This is exactly the scene I was thinking of when reading this.  One of the funniest movies ever.  You have to watch it at least twice to catch all the lines.

Day_Of_The_Tentacle's picture

I was thinking about Mannequin.

Arius's picture

CD - pull up that picture from the 80s movie of the white guy putting the gun on black guys head warning everyone: none moves or the black guy gets it!

... yeah right ...

francis_sawyer's picture

How come the picture up there is of Berlusconi grabbing his dick?

knukles's picture

It's the formal, respectful form of greeting to refined, cultured Italian females.  Best accompanied by the salutation; "Yo' Angeline..."   Which when translated into English means "Mount me." which is a derivation of the name Monti.

What a fucking circus.

Iwanttoknow's picture

Knuckles,coffee on my screen.really funny.

Arnold Ziffel's picture

Did Michael Jackson copy Mario? ...or other way Mario doing the "Jackson Grab & Lift"?

...or is he sending a secret signal to the Germans?

In any case, Seemed much better when Jackson did it.

CrazyCooter's picture

I think the similar scene from Blazing Saddles would be even better ... I can't youtube (at work), so maybe some old timer will share that moment with the younger ZH audience ...



CPL's picture

I counter with tits or GTFO Monti


gold has now been designated a zero risk asset....after 40 years.

NotApplicable's picture

I like this line (emphasis mine).

For the first time, unencumbered gold bullion is to be classified as zero risk, in line with dollar cash, US Treasuries and other explicitly government-guaranteed assets.

Not for long.

Exeter's Pyramid, bitchez!

insanelysane's picture

Rephased.  Let us create more worthless paper (eurobond certificate) or the world ends.  Germany is going to get kicked out of the Zone.

Urban Roman's picture

Don't let the screen door hit ya ...

(and quit playin' with yer dick)

[edit] Never mind, I see, it's a picture of that other Italian. Does anyone have a picture of Mario?

battle axe's picture

Mario Resign, Greece default, Germany bail on the Euro, etc etc etc. We all sort of know what will and should happen, lets get on with it, Euro go Boom. 

azzhatter's picture

but...but...what about the belgians

Sudden Debt's picture

We keep a low profile for now....
But soon....



Ghordius's picture

+1 OK, count me in. but only if you keep having often no government, this is the most appealing part of Belgium

milanitaly's picture

Exactly. If we crash, germany will crash too.

Germany didn't learn Mussolini's lesson.

Sudden Debt's picture

So if... The italians... Dn't get what they want....
They'll hang one of their own?.....
And this will scare the germans.... Because....

milanitaly's picture

They said as you the same thing during the second world war.

German never won a war and never paid enough for that.

We will see this time.

EscapeKey's picture

Amazing how lippy an Italian can be on the topic:

According to the Paris Peace Treaties, 1947Italy agreed to pay reparations of about US$125 million to Yugoslavia, US$105 million to Greece, US$100 million to the Soviet Union, US$25 million to Ethiopia, and US$5 million to Albania.


After World War II, according to the Potsdam conference held between July 17 and August 2, 1945, Germany was to pay the Allies US$23 billion mainly in machinery and manufacturing plants.

"intellectual reparations" taken by the U.S. and the UK amounted to close to $10 billion

Germany paid Israel 450 million DM in Holocaust reparations, and paid 3 billion DM to the World Jewish Congress to compensate survivors in other countries.

So, that makes Italian reparations less than $500m, and German about $34bn, and of all things you choose to pick on Germany for this?


Analyse2's picture

True, but it is Germany which began the war, and also Italy did less harm than Germany, by far ...

walküre's picture

Dare to make a wager on Thursday's game? If Germany wins, no ESM. If Italy wins, all the ESM you canna stuffa in your pantsa (but without Germany).


gjp's picture

Love it!  WB, you're the best

Clayton Bigsby's picture

That picture is fucking priceless - LOL'ed on that deal - nicely done...

noses's picture

Merkel: No Euro-Bonds as long as I'm breathing

I guess Monti just shot his own foot.


Fips_OnTheSpot's picture

Greek PM accepts resignation of deputy minister over links to offshore firm

Conman's picture

Time to go long popcorn and comfy seating.

fuu's picture

Pretty sure Angela wants to live more than you want to work so...

Raynja's picture

But it's God's work

NotApplicable's picture

Can't they just settle this like adults and conduct a duel?

fuu's picture

I volunteer to be the second for both of them. I know I am better with a rapier, epee, and pistol than either of them.

JackT's picture

Don't let the door hit ya where the Good Lord split ya!

doomandbloom's picture

Hand over the money...else ill shoot .,..( myself)

mrktwtch2's picture

how do you say fuck off in german..she should tell that greasy wop to go take a hike..

Abraxas's picture

Fuchen absiegatchen willen umschtrauflindenberg!!!

edit: if German speaking folk can't understand the above, it's because it's not in the hoch Deutsch. It's one of the dialects.

BlueCollaredOne's picture

Good god I feel sorry for german third graders.  Spelling class must be a bitch.