It's Baaack: FT Deutschland Pronounces Deutsche Mark's Return, Prices Itself At 4.11 DM

Tyler Durden's picture

Curious what the talking heads will be discussing all weekend parallel to the joke that is the European Summit #1, not to be confused with summit #666? Here is the answer, courtesy of the FT Deutschland, where not too subtly, right next to a lede saying "the Euro rescue has turned into a farce", the publication has for the first time, set its price not in zEURo.qq but in Paul Tudor Jones' favorite currency: the Deutsche Mark, or 4.11 DM to be precise. And courtesy of the FTD, we now know the When Issued exchange rate for the EURDEM is: 1.95, the same as was locked at the EUR inception. Said otherwise, stick a fork in the euro, it's done.

h/t Peter

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GeneMarchbanks's picture

BOOM! Goes the EUProject!

How ya like me now? bitchez.

4xaddict's picture

Amusing in theory but if you believe the 5h1t printed there you also need to believe the UK will single handedly be at war with China based on the ad campaigns they are running in the London underground too...... ppl are either going to agree with me here or their tinfoil hats are going to light up like christmas trees :) 

Oh regional Indian's picture

Hey 4X, where have you been? Long time.

And the UK will never fight with China, it's chief partner in the global opium/heroin trade. Too much monies involved. 

But, if it's  being said this openly, then a meme is planted. it is after all the FT, nein?



4xaddict's picture

hey mate,

Just busy trading away - check this out and tell me it's not from the FT school of propaganda -

These are all over London, lol.

Pladizow's picture

The Euro and Europe will simply be moved to the top grill in the BBQ and left there for a while to dry out, before it inevitablly has a fork stuck in it and thrown away - because at some point no one will want it!

Pure Evil's picture

Did they say Douche Mark or Deutsche Mark?

I get so confused this early in the morning.

Fukushima Sam's picture

First comes love, then come marriage, then comes... war!

flacon's picture

FT updated their heading:


"Es gibt kein Zurück zur D-Mark!"

"There is no going back to the D-Mark!"


In the poll on the web page it shows 53% want the D-Mark back. 

GeneMarchbanks's picture

Exactly. Also the denial is what makes it so true.

Ahmeexnal's picture

Interestingly, the FT has not only revived the Douche-Mark.
It has also resuscitated the ß.
Wasn't the Eszett declared dead and buried along with other ghosts of Germany's past?
What's next, a return of the national socialist party?

i-dog's picture

"What's next, a return of the national socialist party?"

Not right now ... they're busy governing the US.

Oh regional Indian's picture

Well then, it's surely a meme plant. Quick retraction, but th erumor is out.


Rynak's picture


In the poll on the web page it shows 53% want the D-Mark back.

Not the entire truth.... the current stats of the poll are:

54%: Yes.

33%: No.

13%: Yes, but what then?

So, the poll on an euro-pushing german website, currently lists 67% of the audience rejecting the euro, and the agenda of the website itself.

Problem Is's picture

I voted "Ja" on that poll...

I figured ZHers should weigh in...

Rynak's picture

By the way, as for the articles contents, they can be summarized like this:

- There is no way to go back to the d-mark

- Oh noes, they didn't decide to agree to the bailouts yesterday!

- How could this have happened?

- Typically europe, they cannot agree on something this important.

- All measures have already been discussed and are ready to be put in place. It is completely absurd, that they now retreat.


The article itself is currently by registered members rated with 2 out of 5 stars. In other words, the article got junked by the readers.

i-dog's picture

"the article got junked by the readers"

Must be some ZH readers in there. Good ... now we are infiltrating them!

Must order more popcorn ... this is getting interesting. Go, Germans!!!

Oh regional Indian's picture

Whoa. More meme meme meme. Anyone notice meme, is me me, such a tell for our times.

Thanks 4X, trippy stuff.


Kingbingo's picture

"the UK will single handedly be at war with China based on the ad campaigns they are running in the London underground too"


What are you talking about, who is they?


eureka's picture

Good for US Empire - it has been aiming for this end, i.e. destruction of the Euro and EU for a while.

This will allow US to continue to bamboozle the rest of the world - and its own minions - the 80% of the US population who doesn't and never will own anything at all.

topcallingtroll's picture

Then u best be advised to work harder, invest, and live beneath your means so you and your family line can get out of the bottom 80 percent.

eureka's picture

Fuck you idiot - I'm not a US'ian - I'm in the top 3% - I'm not a competitive hegemon pseudo individualist - I help my fellow man - fuck the elite - fuck US empire and fuck your ignorant snootiness

bullonparade's picture

Whats US empire, u mean a country with 3d world credit ratings thats been lead by the inept for decades? thought u meant America?

Besides a selective default or back door exit would expose America's: "oops, lets cut some trees and make some paper" policies to the market. As a European seeing Europa fecate itself is rather unnerving, however Americans rejoicing over it, proves the ignorance that shrouds the global economy dealing with its own backoffice.

eureka's picture

US Empire is the Ivy Leagues/Wall Street/FED/DC/Langley/Pentagon - extensions and heirs of old UK Empire - all institutions serving the upper 200 or so billionaires and their corporations via "anglo-saxxon" methods of fiat leverage, colonialism and mafia-ponzi bamboozlement.

THEY/IT - are behind globalism, fiat leverage, CDS, derivatives, arms-sales, wars etc.

They are satanists/materialists/egomaniacs - whichever word you prefer.

Anyone who buys into their institutions, as a majority of the income-wise upper 20% of US population, are enablers and enforcers.

US + UK = THE USUKs (my term) - the ponzi-scum of the world.

Those who doen't see it, are blind, who support it, worships Satan/matter/ego and their own little and pathetic individual dominatrix psyche.

It will come to a confrontation. NATO will dissolve. The USUKs are now celebrating their orchestrated and anticipated demise of EU and EUR. Little do they know the horrors that will be visited upon them, when the world at large unleashes the subconscious and strategic and pent up forces upon them.

The USUK hegemons, who think they can screw China by defaulting/deflating USD - AND - EU by rigging it with financial weapons of mass destruction - i.e. US rigged EU bank & sovereign debt - AND GET WAWY WITH IT - and still have the world suck up to its mindless entertainment and lies and infantile myths - have some big surprises coming to them.

I strongly suggest US prepares to close it embassies and pull its personell out of the rest of the world - for it will be fortress US against the rest of the world - very, very soon - and 911 will look like a warm-up - all courtecy of none but US Empire.

SDRII's picture

Wouldn’t be so quick to say the EUR breakup is dollar favorable other than very short term. A benchmarked DM? Russian central bank out this morning saying they will be buying more gold. China biggest gold producer. EUR fight is just a warm-up for the IMF. Lagarde move to appoint China national and the reapportionment of votes is the real tell










DaBernank's picture

When you work for cheaper than the Chinese, you can have your jobs back, stoopid lazy Amerikaner!

Problem Is's picture

Power of the Non-Corporate Local Economy
I don't need your stinkin' corporate job...

I sell my surplus farm produce, reload ammo, clean and repair generator motors and firearms...

Business couldn't be better...

But YOU pay in silver... none of those funny Bernankster Bucks...

Al Gorerhythm's picture

Let's start a movement. Let's occupy the OWS crowd.

TMLutas's picture

The Boston Consulting Group came out with a study earlier this year. Production equality date is set for 2015.

sqz's picture

End of EU project is a bit of a stretch. There are several countries in EU not in EMU/EZ. I doubt even those countries would welcome/accept failure of EU at this point, though I'm almost certain they would want no part of further integration.

To be perfectly honest, the best solution is for the Germans to leave and possibly form their own currency block which includes only a family of traditional creditor nations: Austria, Netherlands, Luxemburg, Finland and possibly Switzerland.

An EU with one more strong currency or two currency areas would work and be far less unstable than the current system. It would free the Eurozone's ECB, now full only of large debtor nations, to ZIRP, QE, devalue and print to their little heart's content - so solving their debt problems the debtors way.

Also, it would make a lot more sense for both *those* blocks to attempt fiscal unions and have their own unified public debt markets in the long run, than attempting to do the same with the current EZ.

fredquimby's picture

It took 31 years to implement the EURO. How long to do what you suggest?


gojam's picture

within 31 days. The DMs are already being printed.

FEDbuster's picture

I think the drachma is ready and waiting.  Should give the Zimbabwe dollar a "run for it's money".

Al Gorerhythm's picture

Let's call it the Zombibwe dollar, shall we?

Problem Is's picture

The Irish Punt is being printed and warehoused...

sqz's picture

Germans prepare for every eventuality.

You are aware that Germany has been pulling out their old stock and printing new stock of DM this year, right? And that over 70% of the population think the Euro is unworkable?

A country merely changing currency would not take long at all, especially with sufficient preparation. And, yes, Germany is well used to doing this, if you read your history.

Problem Is's picture

The days of the pro EU, pro Euro, Chancellor (M)Urkel-ator are numbered...

Freddie's picture

Where are you guys hearing about the punt, drachma and DMs being printed?  Didn't gGErmany warehouse and store the old DM currency?  I thought they saved it just in case.   Most Germans hated the Euro when it was launched - ditto most Italians.

Ned Zeppelin's picture

Lesson of the Euro: One size does not fit all. 

Ghordius's picture


the DollarZone is quite similar to the EuroZone and the States can have budget deficits and all...

TMLutas's picture

Just about every US state has a balanced budget requirement. Depending on how you count it, it's 45+ and as high as 49.

AbelCatalyst's picture

Um, I called this two days ago.

See the first post here:

Admittedly, I was not alone as others pointed out, but not a bad call!!

Double down on EUO while it is down today!! Great opportunity (maybe - who knows in this blizzaro market!!)

i-dog's picture


[original hasty [enthusiastic!] comment deleted after reading the actual FTD article titled: "Es gibt kein Zurück zur D-Mark!" (There's no going back to the D-Mark!). Apologies to those who uprated me.]

I still do hope that Germany will go back the the DMark, because it is our only strategic hope against the globalists. We must destroy their home base: the EU/EZ.

Ghordius's picture

I was not aware of being a globalist. The horror!

I'll send my Euro-Armies and my Euro-Fleets to find and trash you ;-)

i-dog's picture

I'm talking about the control structures and bEUROcrats, not the people ... just to clarify [for others who may be tempted to junk you].

BTW, when you send out the Euro-Fleet, check out the Spanish navy ... They have glass-bottomed boats so that they can view the last Spanish navy they sent out! ;)

RemiG2010's picture


Well, Europeans will have to work on new EuroProject. What's the big deal! The political EUProject stays intact, maybe with few changes in Lisbon Treaty and this time around no one is allowed to f..... it up! No more GSquid currency swaps! No more eurostat data manipulation, metodology tweaks! No more other goodies....

Stoploss's picture

I made a rather large bet with someone that the DM would be back by today. Guess what, i won.

Should i collect, or let him off the hook?