It's Here, The Kindle Paperweight... Er Paperwhite

Tyler Durden's picture

Please sit down before reading the stunning list of new features that Amazon has unveiled this morning for the new Kindle Paperwhite:- (ready)...

  • Front-Lit
  • Changeable Fonts
  • Better Resolution
  • Better Battery

Compelling stuff! No happy-ending? No buying of Spanish bonds, and (pseudo) sterilized money printing? No coffee-making attachment? Odd, it seems the news is being sold as AMZN slides from intraday highs...

 

 

What features were you expecting?

Finally, via the LA Times, here is one reason why soon not even Amazon will be able to offset its negative profit margins with volume: California Sales Tax which is coming to a virtual Amazon store near you in 9 days.

With Amazon.com set to begin collecting sales taxes on California purchases Sept. 15, many tech-savvy consumers are cramming in some last-minute tax-free shopping.

 

Chris Cheng doesn't need 40 hand warmers right now, but the longtime Amazon.com customer is loading up on them anyway.

 

With the Internet retail giant set to begin collecting sales taxes on California purchases Sept. 15, the San Francisco resident is among many tech-savvy consumers trying to cram in some last-minute tax-free shopping.

 

Depending on where they live, Californians pay 7.25% to 9.75% in sales taxes, so the savings are substantial — especially on big-ticket items such as electronics. But bargain hunters are also stocking up on inexpensive goods such as food, DVDs and carpet cleaner.

 

"I've ordered nine things in the last two weeks," said Cheng, 32, whose purchases include a hands-free roaming camera for $199.99, five pounds of protein powder for $53.99 and exercise resistance bands for $26.99. "Any time you can save money, that's a good thing."

 

He's not the only one looking for a deal.

 

Abdel Ibrahim, a tech entrepreneur and trader from San Diego, said he would buy a MacBook Air and MacBook Pro with retina display on Amazon before the cutoff, a move that will save him about $270 in sales taxes.

 

"It makes a huge difference," the 30-year-old said. "If there's anything else I can think of where I can fork up some money and save a couple hundred bucks, I probably will."

 

Amazon won't say whether sales to California customers have spiked in recent weeks. But judging from comments on social media sites and reportedly increased buying activity in other states before similar sales tax laws went into effect, many shoppers see these final days as an excuse to shop freely

...

It remains to be seen how shoppers will respond once the sales tax law kicks in. Many said Amazon's convenience still couldn't be beat. Others said they'd be more inclined to shop at local stores and get their purchases right away.

 

Self-professed "Amazon junkie" Lauren Anderson, 27, isn't taking any chances. The Burbank resident has been splurging on Amazon purchases in recent weeks, buying a coffee maker, video games, cable connectors and a phone charger. She might also buy a laptop.

 

"When I first read about the fact that Amazon was going to have to start collecting taxes in September, I seriously thought I was having a bad dream," she said. "My mailman probably thinks I've lost my mind, all these packages coming and coming."

One can only hope Lauren did not use her EBT card to pay for all those purchases...

Read on here.

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Aziz's picture

I can't eat this.

vast-dom's picture

if anyone can eat this, it's you Aziz!

camaro68ss's picture

Nice! sign me up for 2 then. S&P's up so its all good!

Carl Spackler's picture

If the Kindle comes with:

1. A virtual dog whistle

2. A pick-up line generator

3. And an app that tells you if any of your relatives are dinosaurs

ONLY THEN, I will buy one.

ACP's picture

Don't forget what he said next..."Are you...German?"

That's it, I'm calling a top for the market!

Gully Foyle's picture

Aziz

fuck that try selling it as a first edition


Doublescythe's picture

HAHA what a piece of shit.

Buying Apple with both fucking hands at this point.

TPTB's picture

If you already own a Kindle you won't want to miss out on this new updated edition, because now the screen comes complete with a lightbulb.

Squid Vicious's picture

just ripped $3 to 252.6, should have BTFD muppetz!!

duo's picture

AMZN got a huge sales boost in June before the Texas sales tax fiasco began.  This is a way to ramp the top line and cash in options.  Look for c rappy comps a year from now.  You heard it here first.

I, too, bought $1000 worth of stuff I didn't need to avoid sales tax back in June.  The UPS delivery guy said it was a madhouse.

Stoploss's picture

Oh, so it's the same as my three year old iphone 3gs 16g.

Except my iphone will hook up to the internet without a wifi or router.

A Nanny Moose's picture

as a bonus, the iPhone sometimes works as a phone.

Stoploss's picture

Holy shit i forgot all about that. Thanks for the reminder.

hannah's picture

so you have to also buy the kindle thru att and pay a huge monthly fee...?

chunga's picture

Nope, the only thing you have to buy from them is the Kindle.

If you have wi-fi you can download thousands of books (and keep them, give to friends, whatever) from http://www.gutenberg.org/

Tons and tons of books for free. Good books.

I hate being a "consumer" as much as the next guy...but I bet just about everyone on ZH has a computer of some sort LOL.

hannah's picture

chunga - i was being facetious. stoploss's stating that the kindle is old tech just shows how stupid the apple fanboi's are.....

chunga's picture

ok, I'm not trying to convince anyone to buy anything or throw away paper books or ipads.

We love the Kindle Fire and it has paid for itself already with all the free books we have on it. That has to frost AMZN's ass 'cuz they want to sell you their content.

(including the donation to gutenberg)

 

duo's picture

you didn't eat that, the government did.

zanez's picture

No free Spiderman towel?

 

Xibalba's picture

P/E of 305?  What's not to like? 

Caviar Emptor's picture

This is the cheapest market in American history.

spdrdr's picture

You can say that again!

 

Caviar Emptor's picture

This is the cheapest market in American history.

disabledvet's picture

Not an owner...definitely a buyer.

gjp's picture

And just like every earnings miss (and they missed sales last quarter too, all you 'they're-investing-for-future-growth' types) stock briefly drops and then heads for the stratosphere.  Didn't you hear, Mario is buying unlimited Eurobonds!  Buy Amazon!

RacerX's picture

Will it read the books for me?

centerline's picture

+1.  I am waiting for the osmosis attachment.  Probably will give me a brain tumor though.

Gully Foyle's picture

RacerX

My A500 will, and in a hot British accent.

Plus the little woman can't complain.

larz's picture

I was hoping for each page printed on its own sheet of paper.

 

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Paper? That's a barbarous relic.

Example........the dollar bill.

Patriot Eke's picture

Bills are cloth, not paper, though.

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Now that would make them much more valuable tasty. :>)

ParkAveFlasher's picture

...and much easier to sew into garmets ala Hungarian druids.

TWSceptic's picture

That's even more barbaric, paper was invented after cloth.

Gully Foyle's picture

TWSceptic

One of the first things men discovered after fire was lighting farts.


blunderdog's picture

FRNs are paper.

Paper can be made from wood-pulp OR from cotton/linen.

What makes it paper is the way it's made, not the ingredients.

Dr. Engali's picture

Bring back the Lincoln greenback.

knukles's picture

Front lit?
Like a deer in the headlingts?

Front lit.

 

New and Improved.

 

 

Who the fuck buys this shit?

El Viejo's picture

Romance novel aficionados.

 

Ying-Yang's picture

Though Amazon does not release sales numbers, the company did recently claim to own 22 percent tablet market share, whichAnthony Diclemente of Barclays Capital estimates as 7 million tablets sold.

7 million tablets, baby!

Conrad Murray's picture

Where's the FBI phone home feature?

ParkAveFlasher's picture

Collector's edition gold binding?

Yen Cross's picture

 A preloaded file with all the "major" fiat templates.

Patriot Eke's picture

Why would anyone bother now that the Nexus 7 is out?

Element's picture

Don't have a Kindle, don't intend to either, but I personally love it when shit that works doesn't get changed for no good, or needed reason.

Less is often more and minimalist change is often more than enough, and entirely appropriate to the intended purpose.  And most people don't use the shit they already have, because ... it's really just peripheral useless shit, you'll never use ... or it is some digital bandit's scam ... lot of that on new schmartyphones

Most times when I get something upgraded or improved now, I cringe and have no patience whatsoever left for all the painful insulting BS from gurus and marketeers, because I know I'm going to more-or-less detest it, for they will have vandalised it and called it somehow 'better', than before, merely so they can cynically lever a new wave of suckers to buy into it, and its assault on reason.

It's virtual never actually 'better', it's just been 'changed', made more stupidly glossy, and usually functionally much worse.  Windows8 is the mother-of-all shitty fucked-up examples of this vandalising marketing BS process, of taking something that was already marginally intuitive and functional (Windows7) and completely destroying it, just to release a new but completely fucked-in-the-head 'product', so they can prop their stock, but that is a total pain in the arse to use.

Usually the new lesser-gadget 'features' on phones are more or less useless shit, that just distracts from what they once did.  Like make phone calls and communicate, 'n stuff.   Why anyone needs version 7 of a phone. as version 6 is just not cutting it any more, is lost on me.

 

Bravo to any company who 'gets-it', and doesn't go down this cynical glossy 'feature-set' road to an actual digital wasteland.

A Nanny Moose's picture

Personally, my killer app is battery life.

BigJim's picture

Yup, and the ability to download 10,000's of pages of libertarian literature and store it on something I can slip into my jacket pocket.

Rothbard's History of Economic Thought... Man, Economy & State... you name it, my Kindles got it.

No serious Austrian student would be without one, unless he (and yes, students of Austrian economics are virtually always a 'he') only wants to read them at home.

NidStyles's picture

A serious Austrian student wouldn't need the books, he would able to answer questions on Economics on the fly from his complete understanding of Praxeology and how to apply A Priori.