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Update: It's Not On Just Yet: Iran Denies Earlier Reports:... Iran Closes Straits Of Hormuz, Oil Explodes

Tyler Durden's picture





 

And update from Bloomberg:

  • HORMUZ STRAIT IS NOT SHUT: IRAN FOREIGN MINISTRY SPOKESMAN - Bloomberg

Earlier:

Iran has closed the Straits of Hormuz for military training as was expected yesterday, according to RanSquawk. Oil, and all other commodities, are outtahere.

And entire commodity complex:

And for those curious about more, RanSquawk speculates that the source of the data is a report in the Tehran Times saying that Iran will hold War Games in which it would close the Straits. Unclear if this is what Ran referenced when they said the Straits were already closed.

TEHRAN - MP Parviz Sorouri of the Majlis National Security and Foreign Policy Committee has said that Iran plans to practice its ability to close the Strait of Hormuz, one of the world’s most strategically important chokepoints, which accounts for about 30% of the world’s seaborne oil shipments.
“Currently, the Middle East region supplies 70 percent of the world’s energy needs, (most of) which are transported through the Strait of Hormuz. We will hold an exercise to close the Strait of Hormuz in the near future. If the world wants to make the region insecure, we will make the world insecure,” ISNA quoted Sorouri as saying on Tuesday.
 


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Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:57 | Link to Comment Cdad
Cdad's picture

LOL!  Iranians selling all crude fwds...as fast as possible...probably faster than their boats in the  Straits Of Hormuz.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:40 | Link to Comment ActionFive
ActionFive's picture

Has to make bankers jealous.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:57 | Link to Comment rambler6421
rambler6421's picture

WWIII bitchez!

 

libertarian86.blogspot.com

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:01 | Link to Comment Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

It's not war.  It's operation kinetic twist....bitchez.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:58 | Link to Comment MarcusLCrassus
MarcusLCrassus's picture

Good thing the oil pipeline they have been building to bypass Hormuz is almost done.

Problem, Iran? 

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-505245_162-57336490/uae-says-oil-pipeline-by...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:20 | Link to Comment Bicycle Repairman
Bicycle Repairman's picture

Building pipelines to bypass "chokepoints" is a complete no-brainer.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:33 | Link to Comment Pegasus Muse
Pegasus Muse's picture

It's a not-so-good thing for oil producers that oil pipelines are tempting High Value Targets that are hard to defend and tend to get blown up with disturbing regularity when TSHTF. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:02 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

yup kinda hard to protect a really long snake like that especially when those around it consider the builder a snake too.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:58 | Link to Comment Zero Debt
Zero Debt's picture

Pixel perfect spike

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:59 | Link to Comment LookingWithAmazement
LookingWithAmazement's picture

Finally, Armageddon.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:59 | Link to Comment topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

You cannot close international transitways for military exercise.

It is considered an act of war.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:09 | Link to Comment CIABS
CIABS's picture

good point.  whether they actually did close it seems to be in doubt here.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:12 | Link to Comment SixFeetFromTheHedge
SixFeetFromTheHedge's picture

You mean the Iranian water borders which the US had drawed and then called "international waters"? 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:04 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

we and England redrew every other line in the greater area, why stop there

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:16 | Link to Comment lunaticfringe
lunaticfringe's picture

Yea...so watcha gonna do about it?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:27 | Link to Comment infotechsailor
infotechsailor's picture

"its an act of war"

 

... but western led sanctions and flying drones over their airspace, that's just 'non-kinetic action'

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:00 | Link to Comment Fips_OnTheSpot
Fips_OnTheSpot's picture

Weee...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:00 | Link to Comment Iranian Dictator
Iranian Dictator's picture

I told you bitchez I was going to close it. Now I got your drone and your oil.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:01 | Link to Comment MountainMan
MountainMan's picture

Hormuz, bitchez.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:02 | Link to Comment maximin thrax
maximin thrax's picture

It's been reported that someone just littered the Straits of Hormuz with targets for an impending American naval exercise. /

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:03 | Link to Comment Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Send in the drones! 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:45 | Link to Comment MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Don't you love farce? 
My fault, I fear. 
I thought that you'd want what I want - 
Sorry, my dear. 
But where are the drones? 
There ought to be drones. 
Quick, send in the drones.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:54 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

must you drone on?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:16 | Link to Comment MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

And where are the drones? 
Quick, send in the drones. 
Don't bother - they're here.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:26 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

and just like Emmett Kelly, it's all driven by a sad clown

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:03 | Link to Comment Macca
Macca's picture

Maybe it has something to do with this:

OPEC SAID TO AGREE TO 30M B/D OUTPUT CEILING, DELEGATE SAYS 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:53 | Link to Comment Savvy
Savvy's picture

Interesting. It is, of course, a senior commander of Iran's revolutionary guards that is president of OPEC this year

 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/jul/27/iran-revolutionary-guards-opec-rostam-ghasemi

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:03 | Link to Comment Dick Darlington
Dick Darlington's picture

Looks like oil is not the only thing spiking...

12-13 10:00: French banks borrowing from ECB EUR 158.5bln in October 2011 vs. Prev...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:03 | Link to Comment Jumbotron
Jumbotron's picture

High oil helps create inflation.

Less money for the sheep to buy iShit.

Less money to pay off 1st and 2nd mortgage.

Economy tanks....(faster, harder, better)

Bernanke now has excuse (faster, harder, better) for QE (n).

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:30 | Link to Comment infotechsailor
infotechsailor's picture

succintly put. except for the fact that the bernank and banks are the ones creating the inflation. the high price of oil is just a symptom , and the strait closing is just a scapegoat for the rising prices of everything.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 17:31 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

fiscal policy can not create oil. inflation is definitely a bernank bastard child but ever increasing shortage of the liquid that drives our entire economy has its own special effects.  

 http://gregor.us/fossil-fuels/old-oil-depletes-and-the-new-oil-is-slow/

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:05 | Link to Comment LookingWithAmazement
LookingWithAmazement's picture

Oil already going little down. Armageddon over.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:06 | Link to Comment Vergeltung
Vergeltung's picture

dirka dirka!

 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:07 | Link to Comment Franktastic
Franktastic's picture

good thing i have my 50cc scooter, that is good for 100 mpg...not to good for the snow tho.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:19 | Link to Comment flattrader
flattrader's picture

Move to a warmer climate.  Grow potatoes.

Get a dual.  Learn to distill potatoes. Get an E85 convesion kit for bike.  Store some gasoline.  Mix booze and gas together.

Now you can put booze in your tank and belt some back.  Drive/bike while everyone else is walking.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:07 | Link to Comment PaperBear
PaperBear's picture

Is it going to stay closed ?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:09 | Link to Comment Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Ok. At last count the US was at war or otherwise engaged in battle with/in/for 5 Arab countries, and had boots on the ground in 8 (that we know of). So adding a 9th is just a walk in the park. 

Make the Persian Gulf the 6th American Great Lake

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:17 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

we're not at war silly, we're fighting terrorism with contract security forces. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:16 | Link to Comment CitizenPete
CitizenPete's picture

This isn't Dennis the Menace loosing his kite in Mr. Wilson's yard. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:59 | Link to Comment Matt
Matt's picture

Actually, it sort of is, if you think about it.

Crotchity old civilization, young uber destructive civilization. Hopefully, in the end they somehow become friends. Its like Dennis the Menace as directed by Michael Bay.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:08 | Link to Comment topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Ok false alarm from what i can tell.

They are conducting training to close the strait, but are not actually closing it during the training.

Did George Washington hack Tyler's account?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:42 | Link to Comment tmosley
tmosley's picture

Where did you read that?

I don't see anything clarifying it one way or the other.

Edit:  It seems irresponsible to allow civillian traffic through a war game zone.  I could understand if they kept a corridor clear for civillian traffic, or were otherwise directing it through the area.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:27 | Link to Comment Tyler Durden
Tyler Durden's picture

If you have any concerns, please refer them to RanSquawk, and the market, both of which reacted to initial news distribution.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:17 | Link to Comment Potemkin Villag...
Potemkin Village Idiot's picture

@Tyler

What would be as much (if not more) interesting is if any of you could dig up who was able to FRONTRUN the spike...

I'll pay to see that...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:08 | Link to Comment clones2
clones2's picture

Yeah - "explodes" is a little strong of a word.  I think "pops and fades" is a little more accurate.  I was scared for a second though. :-)

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:09 | Link to Comment americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

A couple of bucks a barrel is not "exploding". Now give me $25 a barrel and I'll duck and cover.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:10 | Link to Comment I am a Man I am...
I am a Man I am Forty's picture

this is why i'm heavy in oil stocks, iran and bernanke and the warmongering us

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:14 | Link to Comment thunderchief
thunderchief's picture

No need for panic, folks.

This is Iran just saying they want to go Anal. 

For the first time.

I think they may get an answer very soon.

As much as it may hurt.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:11 | Link to Comment Ying-Yang
Ying-Yang's picture

This was a reference to US Defense Secretary Leon Panetta's warning Friday,  Dec. 2  "…any disruption of the free flow of commerce through the Persian Gulf is a very grave threat to all of us" and a red line for the US."

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:12 | Link to Comment scatterbrains
scatterbrains's picture

gotta boost those retail sales numbers some how might as well start jacking gas prices.. what else is there ?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:14 | Link to Comment El Gordo
El Gordo's picture

Obama called to say thanks for helping out with his Destroy America agenda, and as a token of his appreciation, they can keep the drone.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:14 | Link to Comment marcusfenix
marcusfenix's picture

Obama- "hello is this the Iranian dept of foreign affairs?"

Iran- "yes, who is this?"

Obama- " uh this is president Obama"

Iran- "who?"

Obama- "president Obama from the United States"

Iran- (crickets)

Obama- "ok, well listen it seems that you may have mistakenly taken one for our recreational model airplanes into your possession"

Iran- " we do have one of your top secret, uber high tech, super stealth drones in our possession at this time, yes that is true"

Obama- "no,no I think you misunderstand, it's just a fancy RC car that can fly, something the boys in Afghanistan use during their down time to relax, you know have some fun, it reminds them of home"

Iran- " it has high tech digital recorders and cameras"

Obama- "yeah well...we have some landscape photography nuts, and the scenery is very nice in Afghanistan, lots of...sand and rocks"

Iran- "it has carriages for missiles and bombs"

Obama- "oh, well that's, hunting you know? Americans love to hunt, it's in our DNA"

Iran- " hunting?"

Obama- " yeah you know it's deer hunting season and well, we did want our boys to miss out so..."

Iran- "deer hunting?"

Obama- "yeah, yes..yes"

Iran- " in Afghanistan?"

Obama- "sure"

Iran- "with hellfire missiles?"

Obama- " yeah, well listen, this is all just a big misunderstanding and we are really sorry it strayed into your airspace, so I was wondering, could you maybe send it back, we'll happy to pay for shipping?"

Iran- (unintelligible shouting in Arabic, but obviously cursing in stunned disbelief)

Obama- "um, hello?"

Iran- " I'm sorry but I do not believe that will be possible at this time"

Obama- "oh well, could you maybe blow it up then? maybe you could invite the Swiss ambassador to watch, he umm, likes to watch things...explode"

Iran- "no" (click)

Obama- "oh well, at least I tried, now where is that report written by Donald Rumsfeld ten years ago that proves beyond a shadow of any doubt that Iran has a fully working version of the bomb? ahh there it is, now then we'll just change the date to today, and the authors name to...ahh...somebody from the IAEA and viloa'... hmm I wonder if I will squeeze another nobel peace prize out of this?"

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:23 | Link to Comment junkyardjack
junkyardjack's picture

Next time they should put a bomb inside so it can destroy itself, what is this amateur hour?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:21 | Link to Comment Potemkin Villag...
Potemkin Village Idiot's picture

I'm guessing that they could start a collection of them, then just dump them in the narrow passageway of the Straits of Hormuz and say...

"Here they are, come and get em"...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:21 | Link to Comment BigJim
BigJim's picture

Good thinking. That way, if China/Russia/Iran HAVE got the access codes, they can just blow up all our drones while they're still sitting in our hangars.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:30 | Link to Comment flattrader
flattrader's picture

I wondered the same thing myself...and yes, apparently it is amatuer hour.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:54 | Link to Comment American Sucker
American Sucker's picture

Most Iranians don't speak Arabic; they speak Farsi.  Farsi is written with the Arabic alphabet (technically an abjad) but is unrelated to Arabic.  If this seems weird, consider that Hawaiian is written in the Latin alphabet.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:56 | Link to Comment Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

Call placed from Obamas private Black Berry, thats why the Iranian official didn't know who he was talking to cause the caller ID wasn't the White House number. 

 

LOL @ Donald Rummy report! as you hear feverish pen scratching over the names on the report as Obama is licking the ball point end of the pen making the corrections. good one.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:15 | Link to Comment Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

Your move Obama

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:19 | Link to Comment SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Obama is not sure how to 'Community Organize' this one...after all its not some tiny North African country, its Russia and China.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:24 | Link to Comment Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

Let me help out ... send in the US Navy and send warning shots right across the bow of every Iranian ship. Apologies to all who can't stomach leading from the front.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:28 | Link to Comment kralizec
kralizec's picture

All you have to do is call it "practice"! 

;)

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:52 | Link to Comment Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

You're right up there with 'em, huh, chief?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 17:16 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

yes, part of the top brass perks include down time to blog on sites like this.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:07 | Link to Comment Cui Bono
Cui Bono's picture

"Community organizing" is EASY... China brings the rice, Russia the Vodka- and you get them both to tell you how much they like your three bean salad. Voila, you gots a dialogue.

Most people don't know that Chuck Norris invented three bean salad.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:16 | Link to Comment Shooting Shark
Shooting Shark's picture

Big deal.  Short it, 'cause it'll be right back where it was.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:18 | Link to Comment SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

So much for all the 'oil short' calls from the permabulls...didnt a lot of Wall Streeters have that trade 'on'?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:19 | Link to Comment dirtydog
dirtydog's picture

Sensationalist headline and article, a) it isn't confirmed they have closed it yet and b) a 1% price rise isn't 'exploding'. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:26 | Link to Comment Savvy
Savvy's picture

Uh yeah. So Tyler shouldn't post anything until it's too late to something about it. Gotcha.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:48 | Link to Comment Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

It's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission.

Retract or correct if nessesary but the spike happened before the news.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:22 | Link to Comment The Swedish Chef
The Swedish Chef's picture

About fuckin´time. I´ve been watching my long Brent warrant do nothing for ages. Make my some money, baby...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:25 | Link to Comment Potemkin Villag...
Potemkin Village Idiot's picture

Bad news is... You're going to have to pull your hand out of your ass long enough to hit a keystroke to lock in your profits...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:23 | Link to Comment firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

I call the helicopter.  I'm a pro at blowing up oil refineries in BF3.  I like being the gunner though. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:24 | Link to Comment Mikehy
Mikehy's picture

Houston ship channel closed this morning due to a collision. this will be partially responsible for the move up as well.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:25 | Link to Comment kralizec
kralizec's picture

US needs to practice opening the Straits of Hormuz...too bad the US lacks competent leadership...

Iran wins again...

;(

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:27 | Link to Comment blueridgeviews
blueridgeviews's picture

How does a piss-ant country like Iran close one the most heavily travelled oil routes on the earth?

Answer:

They don't, for long.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:24 | Link to Comment BigJim
BigJim's picture

It's not very wide. And it's not very deep.

A bit like you, I guess.  ;-)

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 14:33 | Link to Comment mick_richfield
mick_richfield's picture

1. lay mines

2. attack the 5th Fleet with Sunburn and Yakhonts missiles.

3. sink several supertankers in the straits.

4. attack the Saudi oil terminal at Ras Tanura

Then, my favorite part...

5. When the US is entirely focused on Iran, the Russians detonate an EMP weapon above the east coast of the US.  Forensics on the weapon and the delivery vehicle implicate the Islamic Republic.

A great way to win a war is to make sure your enemy doesn't know that you are fighting him.

 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:28 | Link to Comment the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

Carpet bomb pallets of fiats on those suckas

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:28 | Link to Comment azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

but....but... they gave back those 2 punk hikers. How bad can they be?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:33 | Link to Comment Tsar Pointless
Tsar Pointless's picture

The Amerikkkan Empire taking on the Persian Empire.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Persian_empire

Place yer bets! I'll go with the culture that's been around the longest.

For you historically-challenged Amerikkkans out there, that would be the Persian.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:00 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Pointless one ! We are the history of western civilization ! We passed through Persia two thousand years ago on our way to New York ! You probably believe the mud dwellers on the banks of the Nile built the Pyramids.....that was us.....3000 years ago ! We took our civilization on the road following the receding ice ! I laugh in your Russian yak milk ! Go back to Moscow....you got problems there ! Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Russia, China and Norko are next ! We are going to civilize all the heathens....that's our glorious destiny !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:02 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Go to your room....Steppe Child !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:40 | Link to Comment e-recep
e-recep's picture

The Iranians live pretty much without any debt. We must bring democracy to them. They look so appetizing, uh pardon me, oppressed.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:29 | Link to Comment Potemkin Villag...
Potemkin Village Idiot's picture

The Iranians live pretty much without any debt

So THAT's why Israel hates them so much! I knew there must be a reason!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:47 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

I told you we were fucking with them big time ! Panty wearing liberal trolls ! How will the blame America and Israel first trolls explain this away ! Where's China ? Huh? Russia's wimping around Syria.....probably per our instructions ! Bush's war on terrorism is playing out you doubters of little faith ! I laugh in your mother's milk ! Comedy Jihad Spectatin' the Spectacle !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:28 | Link to Comment Robert-Paulson
Robert-Paulson's picture

.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:03 | Link to Comment karzai_luver
karzai_luver's picture

zero

 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:54 | Link to Comment Robert-Paulson
Robert-Paulson's picture

http://finance.yahoo.com/echarts?s=GCZ11.CMX+Interactive#chart3:symbol=g...

 

 

Can someone explain this chart?

 

Apparently gold has hit 1740 today- 8 times

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:58 | Link to Comment Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

HFT?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:59 | Link to Comment stocktivity
stocktivity's picture

Yahoo's chart isn't working...try this - http://www.marketwatch.com/investing/future/gold/charts

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:04 | Link to Comment Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

You know what that proves to me? I could be wrong, but it's proof that there is a pre programmed trading range, and the Algos are working hard to keep the range correction under the pressure of risk on. jus sayin.. rigged game.  

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:13 | Link to Comment jomama
jomama's picture

for starters, that chart is dated the 11th, and today is the 13th...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:28 | Link to Comment Robert-Paulson
Robert-Paulson's picture

Negative...My chart says the 13th

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:43 | Link to Comment Robert-Paulson
Robert-Paulson's picture

The chart is titled Dec 11, but the date is the 13th

 

Yahoo on some serious acid today

 

Check this link showing the 1740 graph

 

http://finance.yahoo.com/q?s=gcz11.cmx

 

Something caused this chart to do this

 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:57 | Link to Comment Schmuck Raker
Schmuck Raker's picture

Pheew. That was close.

For a second there, I thought we might not get back our drone!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:07 | Link to Comment High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

http://www.rense.com/general64/fore.htm

 

i remember reading this several years ago.  in war games in the early 2000's most of the american fleet was sent to the bottom of the gulf of hormuz.........

 

does one sailor on these ship ever stop to contemplate what sitting ducks they are out there , with these damn supersonic anti ship missles around here and there?  remember, despite any defensive methods known as of this moment, there are no known defensive measures to counter these new stye of anti ship missles. they are just too fast and they skim over the ocean at about 6 feet and are very hard to pick up and there is no advanced warning.  it is insane to position any of our ships within  that strait..........total insanity........

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:11 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

You talk of insanity....as if it pertains to others ?  That's one of the definitions of insanity ! Grow a pair or renounce your citizenship ! That would show some sanity ! Monedas 2011 Troll Patroll

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:15 | Link to Comment High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

grow a pair or renounce my citizenship....?   hmmm.  i see..........

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:21 | Link to Comment MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

It's nice they let them have access to computers. Therapeutic.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:27 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

You could be the first naturalized citizen of Palestine ! That would be quite the invention ! I laugh in UNESCO's powdered milk ! Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Milk Run !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:34 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Miscreant....go find an Alpha male to bond with ! I won't laugh in your milk....that wouldn't be gentlemanly !  Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Agent 007 !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:28 | Link to Comment MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Was I wrong? Are you not a wild and crazy guy, you comedy Jihadist you?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 14:33 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

"The Jerk" with Steve Martin is my Koran ! ´Nuff said ?      I joke about "milk boarding".....maybe I'm on to sumpin' ?     Brut Boarding ?   Beer Boarding ?   Ripple (an economical sweet wine preferred by the idle class) Boarding ?  And for our Muslim friends......PIG BLOOD BOARDING !     Love ya, Miscreant !    Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Fool For Soft Legs With Humour !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:02 | Link to Comment JR
JR's picture

We learn from history that the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor was facilitated by Roosevelt’s duplicity in providing a potential target which would bring us into a war, with Roosevelt’s advisors hoping that the Japanese would “fire the first shot.”

Secretary of War, Henry Stimson: “The question was how we should maneuver them (the Japanese) into…firing the first shot without allowing too much danger to ourselves.”

Pearl Harbor, of course, was a little worse than they had anticipated for a target. In putting US military ships in harm’s way, Drifter is exactly correct in assuming the worst; far from being “insane” in this instance, his examples exemplify a patriot.

Early in WWII, a British Secret Service operation, Operation Ultra, had obtained the German coding machine, gaining access to all Hitler’s secret communications.  Ultra informed the Allies that the Germans were planning a massive bombing raid on Coventry, England. If they evacuated, Hitler would know they were listening to his plans. Churchill ordered that nothing be done; the Germans bombed Coventry; thousands of women and children were killed, totted up by the Allies as “collateral damage,” and the war continued….

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 15:37 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Every five year old knew Coventry war production was a target ! Duh !  Could you be a little more precise on the deaths and casualties from "that" first "surprise" air raid ? Me thinks you doth inflate the numbers ! RIP the fallen in the Battle of Britain ! I will never besmirch that valiant struggle ! Semper fi !   Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Rampant Revisionism Run Amuck !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 15:49 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

You are a Revisionist Perma-Troll living in a make believe Socialist ether net !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:12 | Link to Comment SoNH80
SoNH80's picture

The Iranians will have their exercise and go home, without firing a shot.  Point made, ace card flashed.  I wonder if the ghosts of LBJ and McNamara are floating around the Persian Gulf, though?  And if the Iranians are so dumb as to actually fire the first shot.... anyhow, this pith-helmet woggery takes me back to my days on the HMS Piffle during the Boer War and the Katanga Crisis... yehhss... pass the brandy old boy....

BTW Russia will do doodely-squat, maybe make some dough by selling weapons and materiel.  The Chinese will stand by and watch, laughing.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:17 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

I give Iran about 6 months ! Just like they shit their swadling clothes before Reagan showed up ! The Iranian regime will be gone before the next Republican president is sworn in ! Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Stop listening to CNN if you don't have the mental capacity to read between the lines ! I laugh in your Camel's milk !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:19 | Link to Comment Imminent Collapse
Imminent Collapse's picture

+1

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:22 | Link to Comment warezdog
warezdog's picture

Time to fill up the cans in the garage, top off the car tank and generator.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:26 | Link to Comment PMakoi
PMakoi's picture

Obama:  I'd like you to give us our spy drone back.

Ahmadinejad:  You didn't say "Please".

Obama:  Please?

Ahmadinejad:  I will shove it up you ass.

Obama:  I will shove the USS Enterprise up yours!

Ahmadinejad:  Ha, I laid down puts on oil a week ago!  I will be buying your Navy next year on eBay!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:04 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Pomeroy !       Obama is to the decent Americans as Akmadinejad is to the decent Iranians !    Things will be fine when they're both gone ! Cheers !    Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad White Paper !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:11 | Link to Comment karzai_luver
karzai_luver's picture

Well for puppets they both have purty mouth.

Possibly you could drown in their "milk" shorty.

 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:30 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Are you suggesting "Milk Boarding" ?   Nooooo !!!!    I talk ! I talk !   Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Thank You Liberal Dim Wits For Inflating My Already Healthy Ego !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:30 | Link to Comment dcb
dcb's picture

I think we should start training the somoli pirates to do this stuff, let them gop after the iranian navy.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:45 | Link to Comment Judge Arrow
Judge Arrow's picture

My dears, when the Iranians make good on their threat an annihilation of Iran's assets, military and economic will occur in less than two weeks. The mullahs are about to make the mistake you cannot make and survive: Never Believe Your Own Bullshit.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:06 | Link to Comment Tinfoil Hat
Tinfoil Hat's picture

Just as Libya was going to last only days? Granted we haven't seen the full might and fury of a modern military focused all in one place. People love to brush off "those stone age towel heads". We really don't know what is going to happen in the arab world should Israel launch a strike on a sovereign arab nation. There can be a lot of talk right now, but should jews start raining death on muslims alliegances will certainly be tested.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:30 | Link to Comment Savvy
Savvy's picture

We really don't know what is going to happen in the arab world should Israel launch a strike on a sovereign arab nation.

 

Sure we do. Lebanon bitch slapped the Israelis in 2006.  

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 14:52 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

To be a "Sovereign Nation" you need a sovereign.....not an Islamo Fascist Fuck Head !   Muslims are 1000 years into arrested development.....quit trying to lionize the swine !   Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Lionizing Them Puts Their Sorry Asses At Risk As Being Worthy Adversaries !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 15:10 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Libya did last days ! One of the shortest Fascist Flushes in years ! I love to brush their fleas into their camel's milk !   Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Fast Track Liberation Movements !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:18 | Link to Comment JR
JR's picture

Dear Starship Commander: Your World War III scenario eliminating Iran in two weeks is a bit much, even for the imagination of George Lucas.

Reminds one of Navy Secretary Frank Knox’s famous evaluation prior to Pearl Harbor: “We can wipe the Japanese off the map in three months.”

An attack on Iran at this moment, as all reasonable Mid-East observers would agree, is an opening for world war with the involvement of Arab countries, Israel/US, Russia, China and the rest. And, at this point, suggestions of such an attack are, at the very least, not useful.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:27 | Link to Comment Savvy
Savvy's picture

Too funny. How's that Iraqi cakewalk working out for you.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:46 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Hellooooooo !!!  It was a cake walk !   150 to 1 kill ratio when you include the collaterals !  U:S: losses minimal but grieved none the less !   Drilling under way in Kurdistan   !   Kurds now in better position to support Kurds in Turkeystan facing another Armenian style genocide ! Turkey denied cheap oil !  Troops on to Jordan/Syria border !  Yellow cake stored in Damascus "Home Depot" disguised as garden gravel !   Moles can't see the rout because the roots get in the way ?     Monedas 2011  Comedy Jihad Hangin' Out In The Hangin' Garden !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:01 | Link to Comment robertocarlos
robertocarlos's picture

Why don't we just limit the output of oil daily at some lower amount like 40 million barrels and share the oil evenly with all 7 billion people. It would be a credit in our bank account and we could trade the credits for other goods. Those who gulp down oil like water would have to trade for an increase of their allocation.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:17 | Link to Comment LookingWithAmazement
LookingWithAmazement's picture

In a teacup - told you so. Iran will not be attacked, it's too dangerous.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:48 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

Looking the other way with amazement !     The attack has been underway for weeks.....where have you been.....milking your goat herd ?  Monedas 2011 Comedy Jihad Pastor To The Unwashed Liberal Goatherders Of The World !

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 14:35 | Link to Comment warezdog
warezdog's picture

Who was it that said the US will become the largest oil producer in the next 10 years? I heard it recently but can't find it now, he suggested that the gig is up in the middle east and Putin has known it for years, that's why they've spent billions on that pipe line to the sea just north of china.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 15:11 | Link to Comment DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

"oil" producer. The real stuff, the sweet crude barely under the ground, the stuff that built the last one hundred year economy and its growth cycle is almost gone- unless you call invasion easy 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 14:41 | Link to Comment Dcheeth2
Dcheeth2's picture

Russians have just parked their joke of an Aircraft Carrier off UK waters. 

Being shadowed by one of our destroyers. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 20:03 | Link to Comment HungrySeagull
HungrySeagull's picture

Let it go up I don't care. Again a bit of extra fuel on hand and a horse to go about town. That's plenty.

 

Iran has fantasy and altered reality if they think they can choke off the Hormuz traffic. All those itty bitty speedboats, oil rigs and shore installations would make a good training exercise with live fire.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 20:59 | Link to Comment navy62802
navy62802's picture

Make sure you keep your vehicles topped off. We are going to wake up one day, and this is going to have happened overnight. Much like today ... but luckily today it was a false alarm.

Wed, 12/14/2011 - 00:01 | Link to Comment CrisisMaven
CrisisMaven's picture

May I venturee a suggestion: probably some clever Iranian banker has let the clergy in on the game of how to profit from first buying long positions, then spreading the rumour of a closed strait of Hormuz, then buying short positions and denying said rumour. What a droning uproar in markets :-)

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