JPM Halts Share Repurchase Program

Tyler Durden's picture

Remember when Jamie Dimon showed the Fed who's boss and preannounced it was starting a share repurchase program? Turns out the Chairsatan will have the final laugh:

  • DIMON SAYS JPM IS SUSPENDING SHARE REPURCHASES
  • DIMON SAYS SUSPENDING REPURCHASE PROGRAM ISN'T RELATED TO LOSS
  • DIMON SAYS SUSPENDING REPURCHASE PROGRAM ISN'T RELATED TO LOSS
  • JPM'S DIMON SAYS THERE'S UNREALIZED $8B IN PROFIT FROM CIO
  • JPM'S DIMON: DOESN'T SEE INVESTIGATION TO UNVEIL BIG SUPRISES
  • DIMON SAYS LOSS IS AN ISOLATED EVENT

And the joke of the day:

  • DIMON SAYS FORTRESS BALANCE SHEET REMAINS

But at least Bank of America will be announcing a dividend any minute now. And so the hits just keep on coming.