JPM Pwns Nancy Pelosi
Last week we had the mispleasure of suffering a subdural hematoma or 7 after reading CA Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi's formal response to the gas price shock, in which it became abundantly clear that the amount of heavy metals in the California water supply is directly proportional to the insolvency of said state. Yet the only thing better than the resulting cathartic post, which had over 57,000 reads, and hundreds of comments, is JPMorgan doing the very same to what some allege is the most corrupt and incompetent legislator in the history of the US Congress. Which, to our and our readers' utmost delight, is precisely what happened today, when JPM Private Bank CIO Michael Cembalest decided to clinically deconstruct her argument into its constituent utterly insane components. Below we present the carnage.
From JPM Private Wealth
Output from the Congressional Centrifuge
...House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi issued the following press release:
“Independent reports confirm that speculators are driving up the cost of oil, hurting consumers and potentially damaging the economic recovery. Wall Street profiteering, not oil shortages, is the cause of the price spike. In fact, U.S. oil production is at its highest level since 2003, and millions of acres have been cleared for additional development. We need to take strong action to protect consumers from this speculation. Unfortunately, Republicans have chosen to protect the interests of Wall Street speculators and oil companies instead of the interests of working Americans by obstructing the agencies with the responsibility of enforcing consumer protection laws. They have also repeatedly opposed our efforts to end billions of dollars in outdated taxpayer subsidies for oil companies enjoying record profits.
We support efforts by the Obama Administration to expand domestic energy resources, including natural gas and renewable sources like wind and solar that create jobs in America and will end our dangerous dependence on foreign energy supplies. This can be achieved because today, the United States currently has more oil and gas rigs at work than the rest of the world combined, and imports of foreign oil have decreased.
We call on the Republican leadership to act on behalf of American consumers and join our efforts to crack down on speculators who care more about their profits than the price at the pump even if these spikes harm the American consumer and our economy.”
I am of course not going to comment directly on this, for many reasons, including not wanting to spend my days at California’s solar-powered detention facility in Chuckawalla Valley. However, for anyone interested in the specific points raised in this press release, I have included some charts on the unfortunately binding constraints of science and energy economics. Enjoy.
Now let’s get to the interesting part. The press release implies that natural gas and renewable energy can reduce American dependence on foreign oil (“end” is the word used). This is an appealing proposition, particularly with Brent oil prices now 5 times higher than natural gas prices on a BTU basis. So, let’s assume that the US wanted to cease all oil imports from Venezuela, Russia and the Persian Gulf. This would reduce oil imports by ~30%. If Americans still wanted to drive around just as much, absent an increase of 2.8 million bpd in US domestic crude production, electricity would have to replace the foregone gasoline. Ergo: how much wind power or natural gas would be needed, assuming electric cars at 200 watt hours per km? And what policies would be needed on fracking, eminent domain, and subsidies for high voltage direct current power lines to transmit electricity at acceptable loss rates?
Note: the charts below only account for the foregone gasoline component of the imported crude oil. Gasoline is only around 45%-50% of total refined products. The US would also have to come up with suitable domestic or foreign replacements for the rest of the barrel: jet fuel, heating oil, fuel oil, lube oils, asphalt, etc. This topic is often neglected in discussions about reducing reliance on foreign oil: we do a lot more with it than just drive cars.
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Stupid bitch.
I was going to comment but Rastadamus has summed it up more succinctly than I could so I'll just give the ZH brother a +1
yup
It appears from the red arrow count that Nancy reads ZeroHedge.
That deranged fucking cunt Nancy Pelosi, let me stop right there before I really tell you what I think about that hideous Skeksi whore.
That bitch and everyone else knows exactly why gas prices are out of control.
The Federal Reserve bitches devaluing the dollar, flooding the investment banks and the entire planet with watered down Federal Reserve notes.
See Pelosi in this movie;
The Dark Crystal "Skeksis Dinner"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57vaKllPg7k&feature=fvwrel
We should really talk about the insurance industrial complex at some point in time.
I just thank the powers of the higher realm for giving me a deepening solar minimum.
Solar maximum for 2011, possible solar minimum for 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x7759662
http://www.spaceweather.com/
http://climatedepot.com/
http://wattsupwiththat.com/
Petrol Pelosi. Catchy.
Someone has to be the devil's advocate with so many grunting partisan responses. Let me preface by saying that in this case the devil is in fact both party's. Given that we exist in a dysfunctional managed economy, that our political psychopaths believe they can maintain, is understood by most here but fully appreciated by few. Though Mrs. Pelosi so obviously fails to cite the truth of what is wrong in America today we should not ignore the proper context of her statement born of necessity some 40 years ago.
The system as we know it is 30 years mired in horrible domestic/global economic policy brought about by the collapse of our governments only viable enemy. Once upon a time our politicos were restrained somewhat by the need to appear benevolent in comparison to the USSR but those days are gone. It seems that we are now the focus of previously restrained malevolence torching all that we understood America to be while the populace is left to argue over which are arsonists and which are firemen.
I see much criticism of Mrs. Pelosi but I give her credit for attempting to address a real issue that has been aggravated by our own foreign policy regarding Iran. It was not a free market solution to enact fat finger sanctions against Iran yet many here see no merit in free market balancing CFTC position limits. What has the loyal opposition to offer other than trans-vaginal inspections and Tart Reform Hearings on contraceptives conducted by old white men? Leave our sweet tarts alone! In fairness the pipeline to hell might be helpful but will have only a minor impact and none at all on unnecessary bubbles.
You are here...grab a fire hose and deal with it. Take a look at the links which attempt to define and quantify the oil speculation issue or continue to dream that a selective free market for the few using phony fiat hypothecation and derivatives yields acceptable results in a faux market.
"Gentlemen, I have had men watching you for a long time and I am convinced that you have used the funds of the bank to speculate in the breadstuffs of the country. When you won, you divided the profits amongst you, and when you lost, you charged it to the bank. You tell me that if I take the deposits from the bank and annul its charter, I shall ruin ten thousand families. That may be true, gentlemen, but that is your sin! Should I let you go on, you will ruin fifty thousand families, and that would be my sin! You are a den of vipers and thieves."
-Andrew Jackson
http://www.mcclatchydc.com/2011/05/25/114759/wikileaks-saudis-often-warn...
http://www.mcclatchydc.com/2012/02/21/139521/once-again-speculators-behi...
http://www.mcclatchydc.com/2012/02/27/140158/federal-judge-weighs-whethe...
Petroleum Jelly Pelosi...
The 2012 Pelosi GTxi SS/RT Sport Edition
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rAqPMJFaEdY
the command and control central banks will be joined by the rationing of oil in the not too distant future.....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=klvsD9AUSFc
fucking peasants
It's what you keep trying to do, huh, Nancy?
My, grandma, what a big strap-on you have...
She is a sith lord you know, probably paired with Hillary. Their best media pictures barely hide it.
Too much bitch, cunt etc. make these comments seem inspired by the Santorum school of predordained masculine supremacy.
Let's confine our insults to non gender references.. after all there is no extra X chromosome in gasoline. BTW, how do market forces force a rise in prices when demand at the pump for gasoline is off 25% year over year?
Look at the correlation between central bank balance sheets and net non-commercial WTI contracts. Some of it is investors hedging against inflation, some of it is just pure inflation. There is also the likelihood that global production of oil is declining in a non-transitory way.
?
Pelosi is a slunt.
The Federal Reserve bitches devaluing the dollar, flooding the investment banks and the entire planet with watered down Federal Reserve notes.
While I agree that Pelosi is a bitch, I am confused about your point quoted.
If oil is going up solely due to the devaluation of the dollar, then why are nearly all other commodities, except gold silver and a few others, down in price over the last year?
Not trying to start a bunch of shit, just asking about what seems to be a hole in this view you present.
Inflation in the things you need, deflation in the things you just want cause you don't have a job.
If Nancy keeps "channeling" Hogan's Goat.....they are gonna yank her "private jet to the Climate Conference" priviledges
That was much better than ANYTHING i could have come up with
Stupid bi.... oh, nevermind.
Well done. That women is clinically insane.
http://ericsprott.blogspot.com/
nancy pelosi is neither stupid nor clinically insane. nor is obama, eric holder, the occ, the sec, the fill in the blank of the crony capitalist system. nor was the administration that preceded them.
they are self-aggrandizing sociopaths, cynical manipulators of the sadly misinformed and easily "tribalized" u.s. voters. note still that many posts hit either republican or democratic politicians as if there were a practical difference on such issues as bank fraud, corrupt campaign contributions, endless foreign wars, endless war on drugs, endless coddling of israel, civil liberties destruction, regulatory capture .... they keep the abortion issue burning to keep the tribes apart, apparently. works for them.
Bang on. As long as Americans are trapped into the false left/right republican/democratic paradigm, we are doomed to having the likes of Pelosi ruining our lives whilst enriching hers and the banksters.
' kill 'em all' as metallica said
I agree with most of what you said except Pelosi truly does seem to be dumb as a box of rocks.
Yeah, she's dumb alright. Reminds me of a line from Terry Bradshaw: "I'm so dumb, I had to hire someone to fly my private jet!"
There are many ways of making lots of money and friends that do not require a microgram of intelligence or wit.
Being rich does not prove you are smart or to be envied.
"tribalized" u.s. voters
+1
Unfortunately, few people have spent the time or effort to actually look at what a "unit of energy" means. If more Americans understood how energy is measured and how much energy there is per liter of fossil fuel, we would be able to have an informed discussion, recognizing the extreme technical difficulty in replacing such an energy-dense source. Instead, politicians traffic in platitudes back and forth at each other, secure in the knowledge that few people understand what they are talking about any more than they do. Sadly, when people are dumb enough to trust a politician like Pelosi, they are dumb enough simply to accept what she says. "She's in charge. She has information we don't have." Possible only because of what you said: tribalized voters. Nice phrase that! If she's against the "others", she must be okay. Some people are incapable of the reasoning necessary to rationally discuss options, and that's one thing. But for those who could absorb the information if they simply spent the time and effort to educate themselves... those are the people who are so damned lazy it's just despicable.
If only we could burn Pelosi and her ilk in our internal combustion engines we'd have the problem solved.
Lie-O-Diesel!
Another point to consider is the poor efficiency of the internal combustion gasoline engine. More energy gets wasted as unburned fuel and heat than gets used by the vehicle.
"Stupid bitch."
Agreed...
But Barney Frank is an even stupider bitch...
Chris Dodd is an even dumber, stupider bitch...
And Obama Bin Lyin'... The stupid bitch's, stupid bitch...
you're such a racist! Bwaaaahaaahaaaaa!
Politicians, Bitchez!!!!
Well put.
Politicians like Pelosi will never hesitate to spout any lie, no matter how stupid or ignorant, if it means she can keep being power broker/pupper master for another day.
Disgusting.
What truly amazes me is that there are so many really stupid people who lap up her bullshit...
Her sycophants are patiently waiting for the next small idea to come outta her mouth.
I'm betting the gangsters in the "District of Corruption" will talk her into rolling out the first of the "Price Controls" rhetoric.
First comes gas and fuels....then comes food
Come on now, give the good citizens a pass.
Politicians, after all, display nearly all of the same behavioral traits as sociopaths, including glib, superficial charm, and a masterful ability to manipulate people through speech and oratory. It's no wonder they can make people believe their lies.
After all, whenever the neighbors of a convicted serial killer get interviewed, the reaction is always:
"Oh, but he was such a quiet, nice young man! He helped me carry my groceries in! There's just no way he could be a serial killer!"
In much the same way, for politicians, it's:
"Oh, but she was such a good speaker, and well-dressed, and she graduated from Harvard! She sounds really sincere when she talks about wanting to help us little people! There's just no way she could be a lying politician!
The only people that do live in one half of the smallest "big city" in the US - SF. Everyone else knows what she is...
McNoob: ELECTIONEERING: Members of the current ruling party are DEPENDING on the economy not getting worse. Increases in fuel costs get the public cranky. This particular administration is well known for blaming everyone else, because it couldn't be the PRESIDENT's policies. To wit: His present policy of pressuring IRAN is leading to threats to cut off oil supplies; and in fact they have already "cut off" exports to several European countries preempting their imposition of further sanctions. Environmental policies of current administration = not helping. Obama even said he wanted the price of oil to rise as part of his environmental scheme. Add FED printing....
So now we need they need a boogey-man. In this context Nancy's statements make perfect sense from the political lens. Remember: we have to pass the bill to see what's in it!
I wonder if her broom is more enviornmentally friendly than flying a plane back and forth to California at public expense...?
here, here, now to kill some mutants in Fallout 3
Rasta, this is possibly the best and most accurate comment I've seen in 3+ years of reading ZeroHedge. Very succinct.
This woman has lots of kids. who would fuck this woman? Thing, alien, whatever the hell she is. I still wouldn't fuck it
They should take her to the Antiques Road Show.
Cunt Disorderment is more like it.
Yeah....but....Wall Street is greedy. So...graphs....Republicans......oil.......
OBAMA 2012!
"The public sucks, fuck hope".
Campaign slogan, George Carlin.
That's a Bad Attitude....and you'll never be a part of their Club
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYIC0eZYEtI&feature=related
Scribbles.....
1. Apt Nom De Guerre - perfect for the Obamazombies
2. No. Pelosi is greedy. Trouble is, she's permeated your porous brain (what there is of it), with her serial lies and deceit.
3. See cliff. See feet. Run to cliff. Run fast. Jump over.
Good boy.
The only problem is that we will have no drinking water left in our Nation's water tables with all the fracking!
Whether or not this poster knew what he was saying does not matter.
Don't care about fracking contaminating water table. That's not likely. Hugely different depths.
BUT.
Fracking requires a lot of water. A LOT of water. For the fracking process itself. So the poster wasn't all that wrong.
ups for being logical and not buying into the hysteria.
recycling at least some of the water isn't that big of a deal, it just costs more than injection and the equipment isn't readily available yet. obviously geography and climate are key. in many areas where shale is produced, water isn't scarce at all. where i live many operators contract water supplies out of private ponds and lakes, or pay the state to pump out of rivers etc. the amounts used might sound like a lot, but trust me even a smallish river would never notice. the daily flow of a decent sized creek would easily have several times sufficient volume for the entire fracturing process of a nearby well.
then there's alternative methods such as using propane instead of water, i have heard results are encouraging but i don't know how expensive it is.
natural gas is a bridge we had better use, because the other ones are either rotten or burning.
So what you are saying is:
1) the risk of any wells contaminating drinking water, active or shutdown, is 0%?
2) ALL water is ground water; there are NO artesian springs ANYWHERE near any shale? No deep sources of water at all?
As the other poster mentioned, there is water recycling and also methods that don't use water, so water consumption will fall of fairly quickly. Imagine if water cost $0.10 per gallon, how little would be wasted?
The pimp hand striketh.
stratfor has sent out an email about the hack job. short story....business is to fucking good...will never close down!!!!!! can't keep a good propaganda machine down for long. now where is the u.s.s. geo. bush the first??????
yes and i wonder how the wicked witch of the west and husband are making out with the business of buying forclosures is going? yep...this pair of slime balls went from war profits since 2001 to the forclosure property business since 2008. wonder how much farm land in the central valley in california they bought up? seeing how she helped shut off the water flow to the valley. we will know when the buying is done...when the water is turned back on!!!!!
I'm George Friedman, founder and CEO of Stratfor.
As most of you know, in December thieves hacked into Stratfor data systems and stole a large number of company emails, as well as private information of Stratfor subscribers and friends. Today Wikileaks is publishing the emails that were stolen in December. This is a deplorable, unfortunate -- and illegal -- breach of privacy.
Some of the emails may be forged or altered to include inaccuracies. Some may be authentic. We will not validate either, nor will we explain the thinking that went into them. Having had our property stolen, we will not be victimized twice by submitting to questions about them.
The disclosure of these emails does not mean that there has been another hack of Stratfor's computer and data systems. Those systems, which we have rebuilt with enhanced security measures, remain secure and protected.
The release of these emails is, however, a direct attack on Stratfor. This is another attempt to silence and intimidate the company, and one we reject. As you can see, emails sent to many people about my resignation were clearly forged.
We do not know what else has been manufactured. Stratfor will not be silenced, and we will continue to publish the geopolitical analysis our friends and subscribers have come to rely on.
As we have said before, Stratfor has worked to build good sources in many countries around the world, as any publisher of geopolitical analysis would do.
We are proud of the relationships we have built, which help our analysts better understand the issues in many of these countries through the eyes of people who live there.
We have developed these relationships with individuals and partnerships with local media in a straightforward manner, and we are committed to meeting the highest standards of professional and ethical conduct.
Stratfor is not a government organization, not is it affiliated with any government. The emails are private property. Like all private emails, they were written casually, with no expectation that anyone other than the sender and recipient would ever see them. And clearly, as with my supposed resignation letter, some of the emails may be fabricated or altered.
Stratfor understands that this hack and the fallout from it have created serious difficulties for our subscribers, friends and employees. We again apologize for this incident, and we deeply appreciate the loyalty that has been shown to Stratfor since last year's hack.
We want to assure everyone that Stratfor is recovering from the hack. We will continue to do what we do best: produce and publish independent analysis of international affairs. And we will be back in full operation in the coming weeks. We look forward to continuing to serve you.
Tyler:
Do I really have to suffer from off topic Infomercials now?
Stardate February 27, 2012: today we learn the CEO of Stratfor doesn't know how to buy gold online. LOL
Neither is the Federal Reserve. You do seem to provide the more available and value-add service though, and we appreciate your allowing Tyler to share it with us here.
"secrecy, the very word is repugnant in a free and open society...
...We decided long ago that the dangers of excessive and unwarranted concealment of pertinent facts far outweighed the dangers which are cited to justify it.
...Even today, there is little value in insuring the survival of our nation if our traditions do not survive with it. And there is very grave danger that an announced need for increased security will be seized upon by those anxious to expand its meaning to the very limits of official censorship and concealment"
JFK
Transparency marks the true strength of any political entity. People can be extraordinarily forgiving, if they are just told the truth in the first place.
How's this for transparency?
The keywords that'll get you flagged by .gov data-miners, and put on a watch list. How many can you hit?
http://blog.alexanderhiggins.com/2012/02/27/official-list-words-feds-monitored-social-neworking-sites-86741/
Two things about computer security Stratfor and you don't understand:
1. DON'T BUY A COMPUTER
2. IF YOU BUY A COMPUTER DON'T TURN IT ON
Fuck yeah! Stupid crooked lying greedy thieving elected democrat bitch from San Francisco. Doncha just love her? One more facelift and her nose is going to split right down the middle. I wish the plastic surgeons could do something about all those turkey wattles in her neck. She grosses me out.
Be a little more understanding please. It's a well known fact that Reptilians are very hard on their host bodies. Blame the implant not the host!
All people have to do is vote her ass out of office.
San Francisco also had that creepy war monger Tom Lantos. Further proof that democracy stopped working.
Every time Pelosi opens her mouth, it's either some deluded lie, or some idiotic speech.
Ridiculous.
That face lift is so tight I don't think that idiotic pie hole opens per se...
But on the other hand... it never closes...
I see nothing wrong with Ms. Pelosi statement ... it is precisely what Mr. Obama and most liberals believe. They neglect to understand that we live in a world of greedy, evil speculators that happen to live in almost every other country in the world. She is just quoting the Democratic talking points of 'evil oil' vs. the common man and we (Pelosi, Reid, Obama) have done more to get oil flowing that any other administration (ever)!
Just remember that it's Bush’s' fault ... not one iota of a thought that Greenspan and the Bernack had anything to do with it. This purposeful obfuscation is the evil we are now forced to live with.
of course it's bush's fault, and reagan's and ghw bush's (and clinton's and obama's). who appointed and reappointed greenspan? first reagan, then the rest at four year intervals. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alan_Greenspan
who appointed/reappointed bernanke? g.w. bush, then obama. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Bernanke
Kinda hard to beleive that she is perpetually elected here. I talk lots of politics and I dont think i have met one person other then my grandma who has ever voted for her. She is a parasite that there is no cure for. she just wont go away or get sick and die. I would strongly advise folks to look into getting a cord or two of wood stacked up and ready. I sell a little firewood to help pay for my gas and always explain to people how in a grid down scenario you can use the firewood to cook any food you might have.
She is the mightiest fundraiser in congress. That's how she keeps her seat at the table.
Her constituents can blame her for paying some of the highest prices at the pump in the country.
http://www.easy-tax-information.com/support-files/gasoline-taxes-by-stat...
On natural gas I have a friend who works in the industry out in PA and says they have so much natgas they have no where to store it so they end up just burning a lot of it.
Is Michael Cembalest the one honest and honorable person in the den of putrid lying psychopathic soul-less criminals which comprise that lesser vampire squid otherwise known as JP Morgan? Because the article seems spot on, although they happily raped the MF Global customers as well as homeowners and a lot of other people in their rather criminal-yet-quotidian way of going about their business.
she might be a stupid Biatch.
but she's also a dumb cunt.
8 greens to zero as of this moment. Really?
You know, I have this weird fantasy whereby Tyler gets to see all the greens and reds we give people and kicks people out accordingly.
Maybe that fantasy won't come true, but here's to hoping your fantasies won't come true either! LOL
Thanks for nothing, tdogg. It's been anything but special.
DAT'S RAYCISS!
Vic Vinegar's avatar implies sour push and savoir douche
Vic Douchewash
At the rate your reds are stacking up,Vic your fantasy should come true for you in about 15 minutes.
Arent you the twerp who wants to be hall monitor?
I think she deserves to be mounted....I mean by a taxidermist, of course! Along with probably many others from congress.
Thanks for clairifying your statement. At first, I thought you were proposing something vile and disgusting.
"I think she deserves to be mounted"
At your own risk alfred...
Like I have said before... The only thing tight on Pelosi is that face lift...
shes should end up in the dogfood factory...