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The Kardinals Of Karlsruhe Kaption Kontest

Tyler Durden's picture





 

Behold the Kardinals of Karlsruhe. The only question is what they are about to say...

And here is why their ultimate decision is far more important than any party-line, ethically-conflicted decision that could ever come out of the joke that America's Supreme Court has become, as we warned three weeks ago.

 


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Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:26 | Link to Comment Cursive
Cursive's picture

Where is the audition for the remake of "The Handmaid's Tale?"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:30 | Link to Comment FOC 1183
FOC 1183's picture

2nd from the left is calling for an audition of "The Kardashian Tail"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:38 | Link to Comment The Monkey
The Monkey's picture

The size of the giant cock put all of us on guard. Unfortunately, we could not resist.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:56 | Link to Comment Jay Gould Esq.
Jay Gould Esq.'s picture

"The Battle of the Iron Chefs-Karlsruhe commences with tonight's theme ingredient: Parboiled European Stability Mechanism. Allez Cuisine !"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:11 | Link to Comment GenX Investor
GenX Investor's picture

I'm not a woman I'm not a man I am something that you'll never understand I'll never beat u I'll never lie And if you're evil I'll forgive u by and by

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:18 | Link to Comment SilverIsKing
SilverIsKing's picture

"A Italian, an Irishman, and a Jew walk into a bar..."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:28 | Link to Comment Major Major Major
Major Major Major's picture

A priest, a rapist and a pedophile walk into a bar...

...and that was just the first guy

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:58 | Link to Comment Ancona
Ancona's picture

So......who's the dick that thought a fucking red dress and a damn fez was a good uniform for a Supreme Court Justice?!? When you find him, let me know so I can kick him in the fucking balls because I look like an idiot in this thing.

I need another shot.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:34 | Link to Comment flacon
flacon's picture

Fuck uniforms and fuck letters-after-one's-name (pH Dee, B.S.), oh, and fuck honarary degrees (aka Nobel Peace Prize). 

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:40 | Link to Comment FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

With these clown fucks making key decisions, Europe deserves what is coming.

It looks like an old Monty Python skit, WTF?

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:57 | Link to Comment Joe Sixpack
Joe Sixpack's picture

This is how big Merkel's ass is.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:12 | Link to Comment eatthebanksters
eatthebanksters's picture

Heisse Scheisse!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:19 | Link to Comment Oracle of Kypseli
Oracle of Kypseli's picture

We categoricaly state that we do not watch porno

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 00:10 | Link to Comment Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

We. Are.Done.With.This.Fancy.Dress.

Klown Kompany

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 07:15 | Link to Comment johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

Democratic ideals are a big topic of discussion right now; not in Germany, but other parts of the world talk about them. We in Germany have learned our lesson with democratic ideals; if the rest of the world praises these ideals, we can only answer that the German people had the chance to live within the purest form of this ideal, and we ourselves are now reaping the legacy left by this democracy. We then get a lecture on the wonderful goals of war, especially from the British side. Great Britain has much experience in proclaiming goals of war, considering they have waged more wars than anyone else. The goals they proclaim today are fantastic: the creation of a new Europe. This Europe will be a just place, and the general equality will make arms unnecessary, so we can all disarm. This disarmament is supposed to kick start a period of economic blossoming, trade and movement should commence, especially trade, much trade, free trade! And from this trade, culture is supposed to bloom, and not just culture, but religion, too. In one phrase: the golden age is supposed to dawn. Unfortunately, this golden age has been described in a very similar fashion on several occasions, and not even by prior generations, but by the same people that are describing it yet again today. It's like a very worn-out groove on an old LP. We should pity these gentlemen, who haven't found a new, big idea to hook the people on, because they promised the same things in 1918: the goal of war then was also a "new Europe" and a "new equality", this new equality whose main element is abolishing a nation's right to self-determination. At that time, an equality that would make arms unnecessary in the future was promised. Thence issued the program of disarmament of everyone. And to make this disarmament especially manifest, it was supposed to be crowned by a union of all disarmed states, which had decided that, in the future, all differences (at least no one doubted there would still be differences) between them should be, well, as it is the custom among democracies, be talked to pieces in open discussions. Under no circumstances should there be any more shooting. And at that time it was already said that the consequences of this disarmament and this worldwide parliament would be an incredible blossoming, a blooming of industry and especially (and much emphasis is always put on this) of trade, of free trade. Culture, as well, should not be disregarded in this process, and while one spoke a little bit less about religion

at the end of the war than at the beginning, we at least were told, in the year 1918, that it would be a blessed era that God would smile upon.

 

----quoting adolph hitler

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 08:50 | Link to Comment Joe Sixpack
Joe Sixpack's picture

Would you like frits with your McShnitzel?

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 00:26 | Link to Comment prains
prains's picture

unt over yu muzt bend anz we inserrt zis larje dilldoo

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 10:24 | Link to Comment StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

No vun expex de jerman inkwizeeshun! :>D

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:34 | Link to Comment Thomas
Thomas's picture

I feel like a giant tampon.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:36 | Link to Comment flacon
flacon's picture

That white thing below their head is the sperm's tail. 

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 23:20 | Link to Comment Manthong
Manthong's picture

My first thought, too..

The Tampax mascot competition.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:55 | Link to Comment nmewn
nmewn's picture

At least you are in a warm, soothing, comfortable place...could get a little bloody from here on out though ;-)

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:12 | Link to Comment smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

.....that is a good bingo......

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:54 | Link to Comment Darth..Putter
Darth..Putter's picture

caption;

"Yes, yes, the rule of law!!  It's about this long!" 

"HAS ANYONE SEEN IT?"

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 00:35 | Link to Comment NumberNone
NumberNone's picture

"I've got this great magic trick.  As you can see I've got nothing up my sleeve but I'm going to make the entire European Union disappear..."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:55 | Link to Comment Miles Kendig
Miles Kendig's picture

System Of A Down - Toxicity: http://youtu.be/iywaBOMvYLI

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 23:09 | Link to Comment Anusocracy
Anusocracy's picture

Ben Bernanke's surgical team announces that there was a great deal of blood loss during the brain implant procedure.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:24 | Link to Comment TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

Keine Kleptokraten können wir kondonen.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:38 | Link to Comment The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

 

 

 

"Ach du Liebe!  Vat do I phucking look like to you peoples?   Das Kapitan of the Hindenburg?"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:24 | Link to Comment fightthepower
fightthepower's picture

They will do whatever it takes to forward the NWO. Just as Judge Roberts voted for Obama care. The German court will somehow push the NWO agenda. I'm not sure how they get to them, but somehow they do.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:34 | Link to Comment putaipan
putaipan's picture

Bendover Bundesverfassungsgericht.

in german.... "seriously,,, it was this big and none of us could take it"

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 01:14 | Link to Comment putaipan
putaipan's picture

told you they v'unt take it....

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:30 | Link to Comment Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

"Ich bin ein beginner..."

 

 

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 04:40 | Link to Comment Boxed Merlot
Boxed Merlot's picture

Wife: I don't want ANY spam!

Man: Why can't she have egg bacon spam and sausage?

Wife: THAT'S got spam in it!

Man: Hasn't got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it?

Vikings: Spam spam spam spam (crescendo through next few lines)

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:28 | Link to Comment unrulian
unrulian's picture

...only those of small mind and gross incompetence can't see that they are naked

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:31 | Link to Comment Rahm
Rahm's picture

Black robes?  HA, eat your heart out John Roberts!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:37 | Link to Comment vast-dom
vast-dom's picture

Do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-NEIN!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:41 | Link to Comment francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

We will continue to say "Karlsruhe" until you bring us... A SHRUBBERY!

~~~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zIV4poUZAQo

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:46 | Link to Comment Oleander
Oleander's picture

Pie Jesu Domine, dona eis requiem

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:32 | Link to Comment Pool Shark
Pool Shark's picture

 

 

[BONK]

 

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:03 | Link to Comment Bicycle Repairman
Bicycle Repairman's picture

Nobody expects the Karlsruhe Inquisition!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:26 | Link to Comment TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

"Put her in the komfy chair!"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:23 | Link to Comment withnmeans
withnmeans's picture

Again, you cannot go wrong with the classic tales of Monty Pythons.... 

No matter how bad it gets, keep Monty Python movies close by. They can get you through even the toughest of times. 

 

Period

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:44 | Link to Comment vast-dom
vast-dom's picture

meanwhile in Greece the hate violence increases:

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/07/11/world/europe/as-golden-dawn-rises-in-g...

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:59 | Link to Comment old naughty
old naughty's picture

Do, a deer in the headlight...
re, a drop of sun no more but the gold stays up...
mi, i name i call myself, no respect for...
fa..rt...
so...a threed pulled thru the eye of the needle...
la...ti...
nein, nein, nein.
Speak, hear, see, no more muppet toads in water.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:53 | Link to Comment Agent P
Agent P's picture

We look FABULOUS!!!!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:49 | Link to Comment sunaJ
sunaJ's picture

"and then Draghi told us that the Nazi and Hitler jokes would continue until we relented, and then he said we looked ridiculous in our faggy red robes and I was like these threads are crimson, bitch..."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:53 | Link to Comment JamesBond
JamesBond's picture

i's still laughing....

 

jb

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:28 | Link to Comment TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

...in the kourt of the krimson kiiiiiiiiiing.....aaaaaaaah

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:00 | Link to Comment fireangelmaverick
fireangelmaverick's picture

Caption "Now imagine a cock this wide going through the eye of the needle. That is what it will take to rescue Spain and Italy".

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:44 | Link to Comment I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

"The last time we shoved black microphones up our asses they were THIS BIG!"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:28 | Link to Comment DCon
DCon's picture

Klaus Karl Katrina Kristian and Kevin

 

Not as hot as the Kardashian's but the Kardashian's cannot break the euro

 

 

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:28 | Link to Comment chet
chet's picture

Welcome to the 16th annual Vatican rib-eating contest!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 23:19 | Link to Comment Alpacanio
Alpacanio's picture

I can't stop laughing! This is sooo bad. We are screwed,glued and tatooed...

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:28 | Link to Comment SHEEPFUKKER
SHEEPFUKKER's picture

Are these the new employees at Red Lobster?

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:48 | Link to Comment Sancho Ponzi
Sancho Ponzi's picture

I wonder if my [daughter/son/wife/husband] getting run off the road was really an accident?

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:33 | Link to Comment falak pema
falak pema's picture

that lady looks like she can pole dance when the lights are dimmed. Are they auditioning for the Crazy horse saloon or the red herrings olympic team?

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:28 | Link to Comment HD
HD's picture

"Time to make the donuts"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:29 | Link to Comment machineh
machineh's picture

'We demand that a LARGE pizza [extends hands to show size] be delivered to our chambers no later that 1 pm. OR ELSE!'

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:42 | Link to Comment TomGa
TomGa's picture

"We are the Kardinals of Karlsruhe, and we demand a sacrifice.  A common currency. (cough, cough) No, a shrubbery! And a nice one too with a little white picket fence and...."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:29 | Link to Comment Cursive
Cursive's picture

Hey there little red riding hood

You sure are looking good....

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:06 | Link to Comment Cursive
Cursive's picture

@fuu

Thank you!  I love this version by Amanda Seyfried.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ag8JyPCe_d0&feature=related

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:33 | Link to Comment MiguelitoRaton
MiguelitoRaton's picture

Napkins are tucked in, now we begin Nathan's hot dog eating contest

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:31 | Link to Comment Shizzmoney
Shizzmoney's picture

"Our specials today are the California Rolls with Spicy Chicken, the Filet Mignon, and of course, our World Famous Greek Debt Eels."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:32 | Link to Comment MiguelitoRaton
MiguelitoRaton's picture

They can be bought...just like Justice Roberts.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:37 | Link to Comment Rainman
Rainman's picture

or disappear by dawn...just like der fuhrer would do

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:32 | Link to Comment cartonero
cartonero's picture

Kardinals Kicking the Kan

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:37 | Link to Comment LMAO
LMAO's picture

"We are Red, we vote Red, Red binds us and will always protect us.

Heil Rothschild!"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:36 | Link to Comment rufusbird
rufusbird's picture

"The briefcase of 100's needs to be a cube about so big..."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:42 | Link to Comment MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Glad to see you dude!!!

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 00:15 | Link to Comment New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

I still have nightmares about his invitation to take me back to his shack for a "smoke." :-0

- Ned

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 23:57 | Link to Comment rufusbird
rufusbird's picture

Rusty Shorts, that is a rather profound statement...if I understand you correctly...

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 00:16 | Link to Comment tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

"Legend aside, the first mosque around the Kaaba was built in the late 7th century and has undergone several re-buildings and renovations following various instances of destruction, by force or by fire.  The monumentally marbled dimensions of the Grand Mosque (a 7-acre expanse that can accommodate 1 million worshipers at one time and whose elevators can transport 100,000 people an hour) were designed and built by the Saudi Bin Laden Group in the early 1950s. The renovation took 20 years and, along with the renovation of the Prophet's Mosque in Medina, cost $18 billion."

http://middleeast.about.com/od/glossary/g/me081120a.htm

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:36 | Link to Comment Rock the Casbah
Rock the Casbah's picture

At least they're standing up - and not on their knees

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:37 | Link to Comment cowdiddly
cowdiddly's picture

It is a TAX.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:37 | Link to Comment Piranhanoia
Piranhanoia's picture

Our chief weapons are.......

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:37 | Link to Comment Town Crier
Town Crier's picture

Welcome to Kardinals of Karlsruhe.  Will this be for here or to go?


Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:43 | Link to Comment Paul Atreides
Paul Atreides's picture

And now for something completely different...

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:11 | Link to Comment Wakanda
Wakanda's picture

And now for something completely irrelevant...

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:04 | Link to Comment Paul Atreides
Paul Atreides's picture

Monty pythons is always relevant!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:38 | Link to Comment Clowns to the l...
Clowns to the left_ jokers to the right's picture

"NObody expects the German Inquisition!"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:39 | Link to Comment Sleepless Knight
Sleepless Knight's picture

I want a $5, $5, $5 footlong.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:40 | Link to Comment walcott
Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:42 | Link to Comment walcott
walcott's picture

The fresh baby for the sacrifice should about this long head to toe preferably.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:00 | Link to Comment buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

The Red Queen demands a warm PIIGS belly for her feet.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:46 | Link to Comment Silverhog
Silverhog's picture

Yes, how many chicken pesto pizza's would you like?

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:49 | Link to Comment fuu
fuu's picture

Tonight on Iron Chef we prepare a meter long bull penis with olive oil, fabes, and saffron.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:51 | Link to Comment Clever Name
Clever Name's picture

We are the knights who say "Ni"!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:59 | Link to Comment ghengis86
ghengis86's picture

"nein!"

FIFY

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:51 | Link to Comment buzzardsluck
buzzardsluck's picture

'we have this much integrity'

 

also, wtf is up with those hats.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:51 | Link to Comment thegr8whorebabylon
thegr8whorebabylon's picture

Ich bin ein Berliner.   (but the jelly's falling out).

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:53 | Link to Comment CrazyCooter
CrazyCooter's picture

I can't think of a damn witty thing to say, so, I will go with "The Cardinals disapprove" ...

http://musictimeline.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/cardinals.jpg?w=300&h=253

Regards,

Cooter

P.S. Those clothes make them look like buffoons.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:55 | Link to Comment same old story
same old story's picture

Hi All,

first time poster and long time reader of the site.  Thank you Tyler for all that you do. To all the posters on here thanks for adding to my education,  and at times making me laugh so hard.  

 

"You see this pile of cash? Take it and bail out the PIIGS."

 

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 18:58 | Link to Comment ghengis86
ghengis86's picture

We Kardinals have made our final determination: Hillary Clinton's penis has this much more girth the Angela Merkel's. We will rule on length after a few more months of study.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:01 | Link to Comment CrimsonAvenger
CrimsonAvenger's picture

Bring us the keyster of Kim Kardashian - it drives us krazy!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:01 | Link to Comment Solon the Destroyer
Solon the Destroyer's picture

"All Euro sovereigns sing along with us...

"When you're fiat and they know it, clap your hands!

"When you're illiquid and they know it, clap your hands!

"When you're insolvent and they know it and the market wants to show it, when you're insolvent and you know it, clap your hands!

"Now doesn't everyone feel better?"

 

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:11 | Link to Comment cbxer55
cbxer55's picture

OUTSTANDING!

Wish I had the mind to come up with these zingers.  ;-(

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:02 | Link to Comment lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Kraut bastards demonstrating what 6 inches looks like in "metric speak"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:53 | Link to Comment Miles Kendig
Miles Kendig's picture

No small wonder a metric 150 IQ is so overrated

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:05 | Link to Comment csmith
csmith's picture

The guy on the far right is Kaptain Kangeroo...

 

Or Ernie Borgnine. I can't tell.

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 00:59 | Link to Comment walküre
walküre's picture

Bawney Fwanks brother?

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:06 | Link to Comment The Swedish Chef
The Swedish Chef's picture

"The wad is going to be this thick and it´s coming out of your pocket"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:08 | Link to Comment drbill
drbill's picture

What they are about to say is, "we find the ESM is allowed because ...." What they are thinking is, "Shit, we only have 3 months to justify allowing the ESM even though its blatantly unconstitional". Basically a rerun of the Obamacare farce.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:08 | Link to Comment bank guy in Brussels
bank guy in Brussels's picture

As Tyler Durden writes:

« ... the joke that America's Supreme Court has become ... »

Bravo, Tyler and ZeroHedge for the courage to say that.

ZH principals in the USA, are on the sh*tlist for the FEMA concentration camps, for sure.

Indeed, though, why do judges need to wear the robes and garments of priests? Is it because they always tend to 'sacrifice' somebody?

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:18 | Link to Comment Wakanda
Wakanda's picture

I got dibs on a top bunk at "camp".

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:49 | Link to Comment post turtle saver
post turtle saver's picture

You smell a little ripe, citizen. Here, step into the shower...

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:14 | Link to Comment cbxer55
cbxer55's picture

A shower? For ME?

Gee thanks! Bet it'll feel real good.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:10 | Link to Comment Ignatius J Reilly
Ignatius J Reilly's picture

Much to our surprise, fahrvergnugen was not in the dictionary, but we like the word in these circumstance anyway.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:12 | Link to Comment oddjob
oddjob's picture

"We merged with the KKK to form KKKKK"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:11 | Link to Comment Seize Mars
Seize Mars's picture

They will cave in. Wherever there is fiat money, there is corruption.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:17 | Link to Comment thegr8whorebabylon
thegr8whorebabylon's picture

5 blind mice, see how they rule, red white and cruel.

one got caught by a farmers wife

she cut off it's tail with a carving knife

it's what the piigs ate for the rest of their lives

5 blind mice

 

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:19 | Link to Comment Fred Hayek
Fred Hayek's picture

Greek finance minister: "I wasn't expecting the German Inquisition." (Figures in red leap onto the scene)
Lead Inquisitor: "Noooooooo one expects the German Inquisition! It's our greatest weapon . . along with a fanatical devotion to the Bundesbank-our TWO greatest weapons, along with a fanatical devotion to the Bundesbank and a deep knowledge of Rothschild chicanery-our THREE greatest weapons . . .

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:21 | Link to Comment agent default
agent default's picture

This won't hurt, it's only this big.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:24 | Link to Comment Catflappo
Catflappo's picture

Not a caption - but the lady looks pretty hot doesn't she?   Or is it just that the two either side of her have faces only their mothers could love?

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:28 | Link to Comment John Law Lives
John Law Lives's picture

2nd from the left is saying:

"We want Subway sandwiches with sausage schnitzel and spicy sauerkraut... and they better be a full foot long..."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:29 | Link to Comment thegr8whorebabylon
thegr8whorebabylon's picture

Introducing, from the left; Stille naght, hilega naght, kyrstal naght,

adolf naght and guden naght, the whirling dervishes of Europa.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:31 | Link to Comment Salt
Salt's picture

We'd like to welcome our audience to our game show, "What's That Smell"!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:07 | Link to Comment mudduck
mudduck's picture

Um, I will take 'smells like an asshole factory' for five Alex.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:16 | Link to Comment cbxer55
cbxer55's picture

So sorry, I had five-alarm chili for lunch.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:32 | Link to Comment Brindle702
Brindle702's picture

No one expects the Spanish inquisition!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:33 | Link to Comment thegr8whorebabylon
thegr8whorebabylon's picture

The Pirates of Penzance, take one.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:39 | Link to Comment urbanelf
urbanelf's picture

"I fucking hate women."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:47 | Link to Comment Lost Wages
Lost Wages's picture

"No elitist Freemasonic brotherhood here. Please move along."

Wed, 07/11/2012 - 00:25 | Link to Comment monad
monad's picture

Oooh

Money money monay,

Money money money.

Money money monay,

Money monay money.

(refrain)

But what they're thinking is, "Ha! I get paid bank for this, chumps. Diplo-matic immunity even... I got nothing on under these robes, bichez!"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 19:59 | Link to Comment Gunga
Gunga's picture

Gold Bitchezzzzz

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:04 | Link to Comment pd303
pd303's picture

"Meine Herring und Damen, you musst payen attention:"

"Ist das nicht eine Schweinerei ? Ja, das ist ein Schweinerei ! Schweinerei, Schweinerei, yes indeedy das ist so!"

"It's a Schweine in a Schweinerei, even to an Eskimo!"

( apologies to Dr. Seuss/Cat in the Hat )

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:07 | Link to Comment Overfed
Overfed's picture

"You want fries with that?"  "Supersize is only 50 cents more."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:13 | Link to Comment LouisDega
LouisDega's picture

"We are the priests of the temple of Syrinx"

Lyrics by Professor Neil Peart

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:12 | Link to Comment cpnscarlet
cpnscarlet's picture

"Hullo Muddah, hullo Faddah. Here I am at... Kamp Toquemada..."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:17 | Link to Comment Totentänzerlied
Totentänzerlied's picture

Ich bin der Herr dem Höllenfeuer! Ich verkünde euch! Eurobonden! Ach? Was? Err... Europäische Stabilitäts-Mechanismus!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:18 | Link to Comment ZeroAvatar
ZeroAvatar's picture

"What have I.....

 

     What have I.......

 

            What have I done to deserve this?"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:26 | Link to Comment optimator
optimator's picture

Und dan singen wir:   

  Ich hab mich ergeben     mit Sauerkraut und Speck,   mit Knöpfle und mit Läber,   drum bin ich auch so fett.

 

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:34 | Link to Comment cohutt
cohutt's picture

 

It's sing along with the Kardinals hour kiddies, follow the bouncing Deutsche Mark


If you're broke and you know it klap your hands (klap your hands)

If you're broke and you know it klap your hands (klap your hands)

Ok now everyone try it....

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:36 | Link to Comment Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

 

Kardinalz Kan Keep Krautz Komfy Kicking Krap Kanisterz Kilometerz

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:39 | Link to Comment Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

 

Breaking news on BBC--UK military can put SAMs on your roof even if you say No.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-18778723

Residents have lost their High Court battle to prevent surface-to-air missiles being stationed on the roof of their tower block during the Olympics.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 22:00 | Link to Comment adr
adr's picture

bwahhhh hahhahahahahhhhaaaaahha ha ha

It's so sad it's funny. Although I don't think anyone would try to rob your house if you had missiles on it.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:42 | Link to Comment JohnG
JohnG's picture

Just the tip.  I promise.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:43 | Link to Comment same old story
same old story's picture

 

"okay, okay we will give you the money. now can we get our clothes back"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:44 | Link to Comment marco1324
marco1324's picture

If you run this far Merkel the machineguns will get you. If you run any further....there is no further.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 20:54 | Link to Comment zorba THE GREEK
zorba THE GREEK's picture

And they are to be taken seriously dressed like that. That reminds me.

What do you call a Nazi wearing a $2,000 hat? Answer: The Pope.

Sorry if I offended any Nazis.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:01 | Link to Comment Crook County
Crook County's picture
"Vee don't zink you can do ze bailoutz!"
Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:05 | Link to Comment sangell
sangell's picture

Springtime for Merkel and Germany, winter!

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:07 | Link to Comment sangell
sangell's picture

Springtime for Merkel and Germany,

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:13 | Link to Comment Bunga Bunga
Bunga Bunga's picture

"The world will go under from tomorrow morning, tanks will be rolling on the streets, everyone will get crazy and kill everyone, people will be drowning in their own blood. It's all our  fault!"

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:15 | Link to Comment Wakanda
Wakanda's picture

"They asked for this much, but we only have this much..."

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:18 | Link to Comment Monedas
Monedas's picture

If you wanted to dress as far different as you could from the feared SS uniform .... what would you do ?        Monedas        1929         Supreme Court Robes Least Likely To Scare Circus Clowns

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:38 | Link to Comment Big Picture
Big Picture's picture

   What they are thinking in little clouds above the heads.

 

1st on the left. Hope she is not cooking F'ing snitchzel again tonight. I want a Whooper.

2nd from the left. I am going to tell the new joke about the size of my penis.

Middle. I hope he is not going to tell another penis joke.

2nd from right. The booger joke is way better.

Far right. If I was sober, I could be a judge of sober second thought {manical laughter in background}.

Tue, 07/10/2012 - 21:40 | Link to Comment Big Picture
Big Picture's picture

    Oops.

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