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Le Figaro Discloses France Has Prepared An Emergency "Just In Case" Nationalization Plan For "2 Or 3" Banks

Tyler Durden's picture


There are three phrases the market never wants to hear. Ever. They are "contingency", "just in case", and "only." Alas, it just got all three of them in an article just released by French Le Figaro which, per Bloomberg, has disclosed that "France has been working for a number of days on a plan that would allow the state to take a stake in the country’s financial institutions if needed, Le Figaro reports, citing a source. The plan, the article continues, is being prepared “just in case” it’s needed and only 2 or 3 banks may be affected under plan." So, let's get this straight: France has scrambled to put together a nationalization plan to bail out just "2 or 3" banks, "if needed"... Uhhh, all we can say to this is, LEEEEEEEROOYYYYYYY JENKINS. Although the person we would most love to hear say it, is the person who until two months ago was the French minister of finance and currently head of the world's most irrelevant and disorganized organization.

Full Google Translated story:

Paris prepares a plan to help its banks


The Agency for State Holdings (EPA), meanwhile, has been working for several days in a scheme that would allow the French to enter the capital of financial institutions.


In the heart of summer, the little phrase from the Executive Director of the IMF, Christine Lagarde , the need for recapitalization of banks in Europe had created an uproar on this side of the Atlantic, both in government than among bankers. In France, especially, we stick tooth and nail for several weeks this summer's strategy, namely the implementation of the plan to rescue Greece from July 21 will address concerns and to redress market the situation.


But according to our sources, Paris is ready to act. If the level of European support-which must still be approved by some national parliaments, provides that the EFSF to recapitalize banks, the agency of state ownership (EPA), meanwhile, has been working for several days in a diagram that would allow the French to enter the capital of financial institutions. "It's just in case ..." said a source familiar with the matter. Unlike what happened in 2008, which had pushed Bercy that all banks should call the financial office that had opened so that no-it-is stigmatized, only "two or three banks "This time would be affected by the device. "We're not in the same situation three years ago," says another source. And today, some are not willing to "pay" for others.


The Ministry of Economy, which is feared to fuel distrust of markets, it ensures that no recapitalization scenario is under consideration.


Controversy over the "AAA"


Whatever the option chosen at the end, France will act in any case keeping in mind that it is under the eye of the markets. Wednesday, after the announcement of the guarantee provided by the state borrowing by Dexia, the controversy over its continued financial rating "AAA"-one that enables it to borrow on the markets with the best price was great. This is Laurent Fabius who opened hostilities on the consequences of the guarantee provided by France. For the former Socialist prime minister, if the State "turns it on its back, it means that our triple A will not be comforted." Europe 1, he found the issue "very worrying". François Fillon has dryly responded, asking "several times to turn his tongue in his mouth before using expressions that are not accurate." The Prime Minister tried to reassure the public, adding that the state guarantees to Dexia will be "paid". However, he acknowledged, "no one can say in advance that this guarantee will cost the French taxpayer, although naturally each guarantee operation, there is a risk."


The Minister of Economy, Baroin, agreed meaning to the microphone RTL . "It will not increase the debt of the French state since, according to Eurostat, which is the body ESS, all the guarantees to banks are not included in public debt." Reasoning is true, as they are not lacking ...


But it is a rating agency who has probably the most reassured Wednesday: "It is clear that increased financial commitments is not a good thing, but efforts to support the banking system can be positive" and strengthen its note, assured Maria Malas-Mroueh, an analyst at Fitch Ratings in charge of France.


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Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:31 | 1743155 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

remember the maginot, BiCheZ!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:38 | 1743187 redpill
redpill's picture

Seulement deux ou trois banques, pourquoi pas tous?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:41 | 1743206 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture



Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:18 | 1743603 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Heck, the Euro-Brits over at FT know how to deal with a little French complication.

Maybe an encouraging word in the Lex column can send the S&P up another hundred points.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:15 | 1743807 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Sacre bleu, Deux-Deux!!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 22:16 | 1743959 akak
akak's picture

Apres les banques, le deluge.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:38 | 1743693 doomz78
doomz78's picture

On a oublie des autres 50 banque du monde.  Qui qui va sauver Bank Of America, Jp Morgan et Citigroup?  Estit de niauchons!!!!  La Reserve Federale.  Gagne de tata.  Ils peuvent toutes manger mes fesses.  Mes petits chouchou.  Achetee de l'or et de l'argent.  Achete du cuivre et de l'huile si vous vouler un epargne.  Mes colices.  Dormer bien!!!! muah. 

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:43 | 1743213 max2205
max2205's picture

Ah Shantee

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:02 | 1743282 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Chérie, j'ai rétréci les banques!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:14 | 1743313 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

No problem, a quick crunch of the numbers reveals we have a 32.333% (repeating of course) chance of survival.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:29 | 1743357 nmewn
nmewn's picture

So you're saying we have a 1 in 3 chance...with all this positive energy how can we lose? ;-)

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:30 | 1743364 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

Europe's mess explained in under 3 minutes:

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:43 | 1743890 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

try this instead:'s six minutes tho.

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 02:11 | 1744415 Mentaliusanything
Mentaliusanything's picture

Sovereign Debt explained for dummies

Yes its Clarke and Dawes again

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:28 | 1743648 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

This is fucking with my serenity.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 22:33 | 1743990 I did it by Occident
I did it by Occident's picture

une nouvelle bataille de Verdun? 

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:11 | 1744072 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

quick number crunch -- 32.333% chance of survival.

+1000 LMAO


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:47 | 1743441 catacl1sm
catacl1sm's picture

Je ne pas me devoir.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:13 | 1743580 Hulk
Hulk's picture

Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:42 | 1744139 floydian slip
floydian slip's picture


itchy itchy ya ya heya

moca chocolat-te ya ya



Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:23 | 1744238 akak
akak's picture

Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?

Merci, mais non.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:01 | 1743770 strannick
strannick's picture

Avez-vous d'or pour mon Chunnel, Monsieur?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 22:31 | 1743985 zorba THE GREEK
zorba THE GREEK's picture

WTF    Did I hit the Goggle 'translate to French button by mistake'

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:06 | 1744059 Prometheus418
Prometheus418's picture

It's all in good fun- I took way too much French in high school and college, and it never, ever gets used.  Probably reads like pigdin at this point.  Any excuse to justify wasting all those hours...

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:51 | 1744308 knukles
knukles's picture

The waste problem is not that it doesn't get used.  The problem is that it's French.

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 01:07 | 1744342 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Chinese is now more popular amongst language students.

Can't blame them. Chinese culture is far superior to french culture.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:12 | 1743310 Two Towers AU AG
Two Towers AU AG's picture

Well Moynihan just mentioned on Kudlow that "Bank is America is sufficiently capitalized and will not be impacted by the contagion should it arise out of Europe"..

Note: He did not say BOA does not have exposure to Europe... Probably ML has more history associated with its hey days...

Nor did he say Customers will get access to their online banking by endof day today.. :( :(

put together it means only one thing.. BAC is a deer with headlights reflecting in its eyes..

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:58 | 1743767 upWising
upWising's picture

Just returned from Bank of America where I closed an sizeable account open for quite a few years.  I waited while three other people did the same thing.

"¿ Why are you closing your account ?" the "Personal Banker" asks.

My sugar-coated response: "Your fee structure is crazy, Your stock price is crashing, your website is crashed, the bank is up to its blind eyeballs in derivatives, and I am skeptical that BofA is 'too big to fail.' I want to get out while the getting is good."  

Personal Banker responds with a  Wince, a painful grimace, a long contorted look of absolute bowel-driven agony and then.... "Well the Show Must Go On.  ¿ How would you like your money, in 20's or hundred's ?"

My response: "I will take whatever is on sale."  Account closed.  FIve people waiting behind me, no doubt attempting to do the same thing. 

Must just be a coincidence.


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:40 | 1743884 papaswamp
papaswamp's picture

Unfortunately the fuckers have my mortgage so I can't close everything.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 22:25 | 1743975 wisefool
wisefool's picture

Unfortunately if you just read the words, they have all US citizens mortgages.

I really wish Bill would have done bawney back in the day (instead of monica)  and not had time to refresh the American Comunity Improvement Act.

Again, if you only read words, history will say Bill Clinton was the last president to create a national surplus. He just sold our land to the IMF and our Jobs to a giant sucking sound.

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:11 | 1744199 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

The IMF had you long before BillyBob!


Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:22 | 1744231 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

They probably do not have your mortgage, they just service the loan -- just like they do mine (Freddie or Fannie owns my mortgage).


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:10 | 1744071 Prometheus418
Prometheus418's picture

I can't shake this nagging feeling that it's a hell of a good contrarian trade to go long BAC these days- not all-in, of course, but it might be worth risking a little in a side pocket.

Time will tell.  I'm not acting on it, just got that little whisper in the back of my mind.  Sometimes that little whisper is right.

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:32 | 1744261 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

What took you so goddam long?  I left Regions and went to my local S&L (top rated) 2 years ago!  I see Regions has just imposed a truckload of new account and card fees.   They can burn in hell with all the rest of 'em for all I care.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:35 | 1743665 Pegasus Muse
Pegasus Muse's picture

Sacré bleu!  Un nouveau noir se pavane tous les jours!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:54 | 1743760 BandGap
BandGap's picture

C'est vrai! Pensez-vous trop?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:38 | 1743879 papaswamp
papaswamp's picture

Looks like they are also bailing out Belgian ones too...perhaps they will bail out everyone.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 22:15 | 1743956 Coldfire
Coldfire's picture

Under the 80-20 rule BNP, SocGen and CA practically comprise the entire French banking sector.

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 05:51 | 1744558 Archduke
Archduke's picture

seulement deux ou trois banques, pourquoi pas toutes ?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:31 | 1743158 Harbourcity
Harbourcity's picture

Tyler, was a big fan of Wow back in 2006 - thanks for the timely nod.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:34 | 1743169 centerline
centerline's picture

Never played it - but I remember this one circulating the internet back then.  Funny then and still funny now.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:38 | 1743191 xtop23
xtop23's picture

Leroy was funny but type in "Onyxia Wipe WoW" 

I played Everquest years ago but gave up online gaming when I decided Id rather get laid than eat Cheetos and yell at my computer screen.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:44 | 1743216 fuu
fuu's picture

More DoTs, more DoTs, c'mon more DoTs. Stop DoTs.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:26 | 1743347 Bad Asset
Bad Asset's picture

For the Horde ... bitchez.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:26 | 1743637 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Watch the fucking tail!!!

All I can say is ROFLMAO

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:27 | 1744110 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Bip Bippadotta says +10

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:05 | 1743293 dracos_ghost
dracos_ghost's picture

Man, Tyler is on a roll today. First the Spock post which was infinitely funny and now LEEEROY JENKINS.

Thanks for the comic relief.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:32 | 1743159 xtop23
xtop23's picture

 lol hilarious

 cue deer ........ Annnnnndddddd,,,,,,, SCENE.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:33 | 1743162 centerline
centerline's picture

Leeeerrrrrooooyyyy Jenkins. LOL. Classic. Made me laugh after a really long day, followed by a really long week, month, year... you get the picture.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:36 | 1743181 cnsteph
cnsteph's picture

AHHAHA  I laughed even before I saw he posted the video.  Non-gamers won't fully understand the refference.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:12 | 1744079 Prometheus418
Prometheus418's picture

Forget "fully-" I couldn't make heads or tails of any part of it.  But, I am glad some of you got a chuckle out of it- any little light right now is worthwhile.

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:35 | 1744270 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

I wasted half my life and a ton of quarters in the 1980s on video games -- I'm cured.   If ya wanna fight, take it to the streets for real.   Real blood is a lot different, and let's not even talk about actual pain....

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:36 | 1743178 doomandbloom
doomandbloom's picture

Remain fucking calm!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:50 | 1743235 X.inf.capt
X.inf.capt's picture

and keep your bug out bag....close!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:35 | 1744124 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Green, I agree, but condo dwelling Mr. and Mrs. Bearing are not in a position to become farmers.  We will have to Bug In.



Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:36 | 1744275 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

Can I crash on the sofa?   Promise I won't rummage the trash.

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 04:09 | 1744490 bigkahuna
bigkahuna's picture

Must install hydraulic turret for bug in. Then crash and take rotation on the turret.

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 12:20 | 1746112 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

My itchy trigger-finger is ready!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:36 | 1743180 Harbourcity
Harbourcity's picture

In the Wow vein, to borrow a Chuck Norris fact from days in the Barrens of Wow...

"The Fed counted to infinity - twice."

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:36 | 1743182 Fanakapan
Fanakapan's picture

The Irony is Delicious, the Frogs elect a Thatcherite Midget, and arrive at that creeds final destination within 5 Years.


We Limeys at least streched it out for 30 :)

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:48 | 1743232 chump666
chump666's picture

"Thatcherite Midget" hahahahahaah....

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:37 | 1743183 fuu
fuu's picture

I farking love you Tyler.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:37 | 1743184 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Well nationalizing the banks was the plan all along anyway. Enjoy, serfs.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:39 | 1743193 Derpin USA
Derpin USA's picture

Did you mean bankinization of the nationals was the plan all along?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:20 | 1743830 Quentin Daniels
Quentin Daniels's picture

Once the banks and the governments have completed their mergers, the resulting entities sure won't be republics, or democracies.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:37 | 1743186 ItsEvolutionBaby
ItsEvolutionBaby's picture

at least i got chicken

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:38 | 1743188 LookingWithAmazement
LookingWithAmazement's picture

French banks saved, no crisis, no end of euro, no Armageddon. Boring world we live in.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:14 | 1743812 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

Wait until French Revolution II hits and you're really gonna be looking with fucking amazement.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:41 | 1743203 nyse
nyse's picture

This shit is funny as hell. 

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:43 | 1743212 Cassandra Syndrome
Cassandra Syndrome's picture

How can France cover this all without ECB support who in turn need printed up funds from thin air?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:47 | 1743214 sitenine
sitenine's picture

France and Dexia are both still AAA? Morons.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:20 | 1743610 knukles
knukles's picture

But Redemption, Salvation and Atonement of Sins,
Goldilocks fucking downgraded Dexia to sale from hold this very morning!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:44 | 1743218 chump666
chump666's picture

France you deserve to get your credit rating stripped.  F*cking con artists

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:44 | 1743219 Shell Game
Shell Game's picture

At least I have chicken -Leroy Jenkins



Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:45 | 1743222 paul_Liu
paul_Liu's picture

This is great.

Looking for ZH vs MS part3?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:45 | 1743223 Fips_OnTheSpot
Fips_OnTheSpot's picture

Nothing to see here. Move along, IF NEEDED.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:46 | 1743227 RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture

Proof that TPTB was "At the Ready" to roll out whatever was necessary to stave off an implosion.

You don't think these guys are dumb enough to allow the whole system to crash, do you???

With the 30-yr. yield at record lows while running a $15 trillion deficit, that is proof enough that the impossible can be achieved.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:51 | 1743241 xtop23
xtop23's picture

I think you overestimate them. They are scrambling to get things buttoned down before we engage ludicrous speed.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:01 | 1743279 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Captain! The printer! She canna take much more!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:26 | 1743351 juangrande
juangrande's picture

Damnit Jim! I'm a doctor not a SPERM WHALE!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:23 | 1743623 knukles
knukles's picture

OK, Milton!  Your're on the next landing par-teee.  Make sure you wear your nice clean new Red Jersey.  We don't wanna make a bad impression with those nasty Klingons.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:31 | 1743365 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

what's the matter colonel sanders, chicken?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:48 | 1744148 CrazyCooter
CrazyCooter's picture

I hate to have to one-up ya buzz, but ...



Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:52 | 1743243 chump666
chump666's picture

They are totally dumb.  Any debitor nation relying on a creditor fix will be soley and f*cking disspointed when that 'creditor' "implodes".  I would start to lock that in, Europe/US will both go into an ecomomic iceage, timed for ironic.  But lasting for a lot longer.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:53 | 1743246 tmosley
tmosley's picture


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:54 | 1743253 PY-129-20
Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:59 | 1743262 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

The US federal budget deficit is 1.3T not 15T

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:03 | 1743286 hambone
hambone's picture


jealous jealous that Robo can make up his own new, unique definitions and you are stuck w/ same old, same old!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:40 | 1743382 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

Bleeding crimson with jealousy 

So jealous of Robo that it stings the fabric of my existance. I only wish it wasn't so transparent.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:25 | 1743636 hambone
hambone's picture

Yeah, there's a lot to love w/ Robo...if only we could all be so...Robo-like.  What a world that would be?!?!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:39 | 1744132 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Facts are facts.  Good catch b_d.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:00 | 1743274 kengland
kengland's picture

It's what they can't see in front of them is what will kill them. It's just about happened in 08. It never is the same the second time around. The more hands in the cooking, the more precarious it gets. There are many hands now.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:10 | 1743304 nmewn
nmewn's picture

"You don't think these guys are dumb enough to allow the whole system to crash, do you???"

Cuz like, they've been doin such a intelligent job over the last few, fer

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:18 | 1743327 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

SO funny watching all this today, the might reduced to running a dead empty Ponzi of a market based upon rumors of rumors.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:46 | 1743440 nmewn
nmewn's picture

I just shake my head anymore SheepDog.

The trend (one month, six month, YTD) is clearly down...the older kids who got all that free candy are trying to sell the sour center parts to the younger ones in the same ole sticky

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:25 | 1743633 knukles
knukles's picture

I managed to re-sell the hairy end of the lollipop a couple of times.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:03 | 1743781 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Thats just wrong on so many levels...but please continue on the basest ;-) 

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:40 | 1744135 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Ha ha ha!!!  Laugh of the evening, thx nmewn!

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:38 | 1744283 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

You meant to say they're not SMART enough to let the system crash.   Where's yore head at boy?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:50 | 1743236 lapedochild
lapedochild's picture

Isn't this ultimately bullish? With Italy's UniCredit also being downgraded we effectively put then on the government tit and reduce risk?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:50 | 1743237 love
love's picture

fucking brilliant, this is exactly the way i picture this playing out

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:50 | 1743240 walküre
walküre's picture

Rien ne va plus!


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:00 | 1743272 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

j'ai du papier...?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:09 | 1743302 walküre
walküre's picture

les meilleures papiers de popo pour les plus grande kaka!


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:57 | 1743263 PulauHantu29
PulauHantu29's picture

Sarkozy's séance may be needed to raise Napoleon from the Crypt for help:

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 06:29 | 1744590 falak pema
falak pema's picture

the only thing that seance will raise is a desire for her jewels, both on her forehead as below in her nether regions. Go long bull's horns! Before they get nationalized.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:59 | 1743269 YesWeKahn
YesWeKahn's picture

Merde alors.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:00 | 1743275 dropdeadfed
dropdeadfed's picture

We can offset our GDP woes if we all purchase WoW and sell in-game gold to teh Chinas?


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:19 | 1743328 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Its the end of the World.....of Warcraft.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:02 | 1743280 monkeyshine
monkeyshine's picture

There is an old saying that it is better to cut off your whole hand in one fell swoop than to do it one finger at a time. So France puts all three phrases in one press release gets it all done and over with.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:04 | 1743287 M.B. Drapier
M.B. Drapier's picture

Aaah, bank guarantees that might not cost anything. This brings me right back.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:04 | 1743288 chump666
chump666's picture

hahahaha " Leroy you are stupid as hell..."



Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:37 | 1743873 Messianic
Messianic's picture

hahahaha "Brian Moynihan, you are stupid as hell..."


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:04 | 1743289 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

but....but.....the stress test results were good

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 02:41 | 1744439 Mentaliusanything
Mentaliusanything's picture

Stress tests all Clear but the prostate exam was Bummer 

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:08 | 1743300 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

LEEEEEROOOOOYYYY JENKINNNNSSSS!! Hey at least I got chicken motherfukas!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 23:36 | 1744125 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Leeroy's just talkin' his book.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:09 | 1743303 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

32.32% rate of survival.....think they were a bit optimistic.....LOL

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:16 | 1743318 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Thats a 32.33% (repeating, of course) survival rate. Should be able to take that .33 and default swap derivatize the SHIT out of it! 

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:11 | 1743309 Obaminator
Obaminator's picture

Stick a fork in it.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:14 | 1743314 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Quelle Suprize....AN anaylst at a French rating agency in France, saying the bailing the bank at the expense of the country is a good thing. Probably the same one wha rated Ireland, when it bailed its banks BUT just before it then required a bailout.


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:19 | 1743326 M.B. Drapier
M.B. Drapier's picture

Yes, we've seen this movie before in Ireland. It's all so very familiar ... ah, there are the promises that the guarantee probably won't cost anything! Of course the ending may be quite different this time, for various reasons.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:28 | 1743356 hambone
hambone's picture

Day by day, bit by bit, the contagion has worked it's way from the tiny islands, to the EU underbelly, now deep into to the near CORE, and soon the virus will infect the heart of the CORE...


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:23 | 1743621 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Its an amazing thing to watch really. The thing they love & desire so much (debt) is whats killing them.

Ah well, throw another stack of Franc/euro's on the fire monsieur, its getting cold ;-)

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:18 | 1743324 vote_libertaria...
vote_libertarian_party's picture would THIS be a credit default triggering event?


Or does TPTB say 'All contracts are voided'


No insurance for YOU.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:20 | 1743331 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

We'll see what rumors they come up with to 'fix' this black swan.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:23 | 1743337 jmcadg
jmcadg's picture

I'm gonna use my 'intimidating shout', we're gonna need divine intervention, we've got 32.333 repeating of course chance of survival.

Leeeeeerrrooooyyyyy Jenkins.

Godammit Leeroy you dumbass.

That was hilarious. Thanks TD

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:26 | 1743350 jmcadg
jmcadg's picture

Is tomorrow gonig to be an Epic day:

French nationalisation talk,


SNB data dump

ECB rate announcement

Jobless Claims


Wow, have I missed anything, Greek default!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:33 | 1743371 nah
nah's picture

it is now fashionable to bail out banks

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:34 | 1743374 darteaus
darteaus's picture

This sound bite is simply released to give a "heads up" to the public for the nationalization.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:36 | 1743379 jmcadg
jmcadg's picture

RIP Steve, Decent legacy dude.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:41 | 1743393 Threeggg
Threeggg's picture

You mean to tell me the french have more foresight than the webmaster of BAC.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:40 | 1743394 RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture



OK you guys, our deficit is $1.3 trillion and the national debt is $13 trillion and off-balance sheet crap probably totals $133 trillion.

In the end, it doesn't matter if its a trillion or quadrillion.

These "investors" who were running pell mell into our Treasuries for safety are not going anywhere.

At the first whiff of trouble or a crisis, those same clowns will be fleeing like a herd of Wildebeests right back into Treasuries, and they will be dumping gold, oil, copper, platinum, and everything else.

Same thing happened in 2008.

It just happened again in 2011.

Why would it be any different later?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 19:59 | 1743509 malek
malek's picture

Best of luck for your 100% treasuries position!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:07 | 1743559 MrSteve
MrSteve's picture

I will be different later because later, the fiat US Treasuries and FRB notes wil be adversely impacted by hyperinflationary "printing" pressures.

That's one. What ever China does to save its bacon is #2 and whatever the "Saudi kingdom" does to save its oil-based currency-wealth parked in City and NYC reserves is #3.

Pick a number!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:46 | 1743732 tmosley
tmosley's picture


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 21:50 | 1743912 jomama
jomama's picture


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:58 | 1743766 nmewn
nmewn's picture

"In the end, it doesn't matter if its a trillion or quadrillion."

In the end, to a paper pusher, correct.


And the point of seeing it all beforehand and avoid living a lie would be?........

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:34 | 1744266 electronpaul
electronpaul's picture

They'll be runing to Chinese treasuries...

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:34 | 1744267 electronpaul
electronpaul's picture

They'll be running to Chinese treasuries...

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 00:41 | 1744290 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

Ok, RobotTrader, how come you can call a gold bubble, but not a Treasury bubble?   Biased much?

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 01:05 | 1744340 knukles
knukles's picture

I'm not sure that there's not anything that's not a fucking bubble anymore at this point. 
I mean the whole world has gone to hell in a laundry bag of dirty jockstraps and all anybody does is pretend that things are gonna be A-fucking-OK. (The jocks will magically come home cleaned and starched for free.)  Nobody wants to hear (well, except ZH'ers ex-ZHer's Trolls) anything about reality. 
A view of the world to which I can testify firsthand.  When most people ask about what they should be invested in they want answers within the paradigm of the old traditional asset allocation models.  Even hint at what one expects (TSHTF, all hell breaking loose, bundles of Joyless Unintended Consequences Surfacing Like Boils) and one gets looked at like they're Nut-Fucking-Crazy.  So now the best advice I can give people is that I am hoping for the best and paliing for the worst; they should get their affairs in a shape whcih allows them to sleep well at night. 

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 12:26 | 1746145 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

I rest really well!  The gold and silver lumps under the mattress lend only solace and peace to my sleep.

Oh, and one of these for my Moss 500:

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:05 | 1743548 The Fonz...befo...
The Fonz...before shark jump's picture

Don't worry the French know what they are doing, this will protect them in the long run..........just like the Maginot line did

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:14 | 1743561 THE DORK OF CORK
THE DORK OF CORK's picture

"Nationalise money and not the Banks" - Irving Fisher.

If France takes this bank debt on its books its only option is to buy Gold on a massive scale.

It could easily just turn customer credit deposits into Goverment money and let the bond holders with the private debt contracts - but the bankers run France - like everywhere else in Europe.

They will destroy the currency.

 We have seen this soap opera already in Ireland - its shocking really.


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:29 | 1743655 WizDumb
WizDumb's picture

Remember this comes a week or so after the french announcement that you cant buy more than 600$US in Gold w/o a bank transfer...


Fiat death 

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:38 | 1743687 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

Buzz n'est pas content

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:37 | 1743691 itstippy
itstippy's picture

This is just a clear warning to the jackals not to mess with French banks:  Paris now has a bazooka in their pants.  If all they had was a squirtgun they might be forced to use it, and it might have proven inadequate.  But since they have a bazooka in their pants, and the jackals know they have a bazooka in their pants, they won't have to use it.

It's a strategy that works every time.  French taxpayers need not worry. 

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 01:30 | 1744369 wisefool
wisefool's picture

Hank Paulson is teaching the next generation of UChicago econ PhD graduates as we speak. No Sarc. He is on the facualty.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 20:40 | 1743701 doomz78
doomz78's picture

The answer is 50 trillion.  That is the world answer.

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