Man Pretends To Be Hank Paulson To Make Fake $353,000 Mortgage Payment To Citi, Succeeds

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Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:52 | 1566548 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

The Greasy Paulson gets the Cheddar, bitchez!

[Even when it's only a pretend Hank 'Tanks in the Street' Paulson]

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:59 | 1566570 Ancona
Ancona's picture

+353,000

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:30 | 1566664 SMG
SMG's picture

Good thing they caught the "criminal imposter"  Hank Paulson who stole $353,000 and not the "honest real" Hank Paulson who stole $850,000,000,000 for his banking friends.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:35 | 1566683 traderjoe
traderjoe's picture

And deferred his GS capital gains in the process! Double bonus!

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 17:15 | 1566780 Josh Randall
Josh Randall's picture

put it on the UNDERHILL's!

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 19:14 | 1567132 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Tierra Del Fuego.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 17:26 | 1566804 sdmjake
sdmjake's picture

Dammit SMG, you owe me for the drink i just spit out on my keyboard. That is freakin hilarious.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 17:55 | 1566875 Gringo Viejo
Gringo Viejo's picture

A contemporary American hero.  LMAO2

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 22:54 | 1567726 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture
by SMG
on Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:30
#1566664

 

Good thing they caught the "criminal imposter"  Hank Paulson who stole $353,000 and not the "honest real" Hank Paulson who stole $850,000,000,000 for his banking friends.

 

+ Epic Truth. Hits hard. Hits True.

Well said.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 17:47 | 1566849 waylon153
waylon153's picture

Damn, even the government realizes how worthless fiat is now. This guy steals $300K and all he gets is a mail fraud charge and gives up his car?  How much is $300K in Zimbabwe bucks? 

Good thing he didn't buy gold with the funds otherwise he would have gotten the death penalty.....

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 19:24 | 1567155 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

The lesson? Next time, don't use the Post Orifice.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 22:43 | 1567698 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

Maybe he should have aimed higher and used Ben Benanke's account?

Made me think of a great Mark Knopfler song, Postcards from Paraguay:

One thing was leading to the next
I bit off more than I could chew
I had the power to sign the cheques
It wasn't difficult to do
I couldn't stay and face the music
So many reasons why
I won't be sending postcards
From Paraguay

I robbed a bank full of dinero
A great big mountain of dough
So it was goodbye companero
And cheerio
I couldn't stay and face the music
So many reasons why
I won't be sending postcards
From Paraguay

I never meant to be a cheater
But there was blood on the wall
I had to steal from peter
To pay what I owed to paul
I couldn't stay and face the music
So many reasons why
I won't be sending postcards
From Paraguay

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spu66V3H1bc&list=PL0FF6286F0667A6F0&index=2

 

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:54 | 1566551 caerus
caerus's picture

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:55 | 1566554 andybev01
andybev01's picture

Sweet!

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:55 | 1566558 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

I LOVE IT!!!

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:48 | 1566712 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kUyutryL_SY&feature=feedlik

Keiser Report: Banking Looters (E173)

Cameron should SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Cameron is in the Bankers Pockets!

JUST LIKE OBAMA / BUSH / CLINTON!!

 

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:55 | 1566559 Racer
Racer's picture

Poetic justice

Brilliant!

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:56 | 1566560 HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

So...I assume this still works

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:32 | 1566675 traderjoe
traderjoe's picture

So the belief among the sovereign crowd is that your birth certificate creates an account in your name at the Treasury. I can't link right now, but as I recollect, the account is used in part by credit companies to create money (for the double entry part). You can theoretically also use this account to draw money and make payments. I wonder if this is related to all of that.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:35 | 1566687 pods
pods's picture

So does this mean that O had to use his wife's account?

Thanks for reminding me about all that traderjoe, I research that from time to time and get lost in all the law mumbo jumbo.  Now I know what I am going to do tonight.

Any solid links on this?  (Besides Cornell law library)

TIA!

pods

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 17:52 | 1566841 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

pods, someone was on ZH last year & shared a whole bunch of links.   unfortunately, all that stuff was archived and the forum went poof!   i do remember that most of his references were from cornell, fwiw.    good hunting.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 18:24 | 1566979 Iam_Silverman
Iam_Silverman's picture

"get lost in all the law mumbo jumbo. "

Is this in re the STRAWMAN argument?  I have read about that before, and yu are right.  I am not sure about the truth in the discussion.  But, I am willing to hear a layman's explanation as to why I should declare myself as a sole entity and deny the encumbrance of the STRAWMAN ledger entry...

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:46 | 1566705 Burnbright
Burnbright's picture

Yes, I believe you are correct.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 17:39 | 1566832 1fortheroad
1fortheroad's picture

Its called a (secured party creditor).

http://www.redemptionservice.com/contents/secured_party_creditor.asp

 

Or just google secured party creditor

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 17:54 | 1566874 tip e. canoe
tip e. canoe's picture

small but important edit : scroogle secured party creditor

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 17:45 | 1566840 Winisk
Winisk's picture

That thought crossed my mind as well.  Sounds like something a Freeman would try. 

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:56 | 1566561 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

They'll make a movie about that guy...

and I'm going to watch it.

 

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 18:05 | 1566926 DosZap
DosZap's picture

<Sudden Debt
on Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:56
#1566561

They'll make a movie about that guy...

and I'm going to watch it.

 

SD, Hey,DB COOPER got NADA on this dude.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 22:24 | 1567648 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Prolly is DB Cooper! ;)

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:59 | 1566562 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

 The only difference the second time around: Gardner requested slightly more money

I'M OBAMA AND I WOULD LIKE TO WITHDRAW 1 BILLION FROM MY PERSONAL SAVINGS ACCOUNT!

HERE IS A COPY OF MY BIRTH CERTIFICATE!!

 

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:59 | 1566571 vocational tainee
vocational tainee's picture

I am mr, rompoy and I wii tax it..

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:11 | 1566614 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

I don't think Obama has a European or American account ;)

I'd better try that in the Cayman's

 

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:48 | 1566714 prophet
prophet's picture

There is no hope and nothing will change.  Vote for me again.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 22:22 | 1567645 Shineola
Shineola's picture

Ah, yes....But, since it's Barry O, this clever ploy might get us caught.......unless...... we got a witch doctor to tattoo that certificate on a zebra hide... 

 

As far as I'm concerned, that would be a hell of a lot more convincing that the computer generated one from Hawaii. -Shine

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:03 | 1566566 Drater
Drater's picture

Project Mayhem bitchez

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:57 | 1566567 Cdad
Cdad's picture

LOL!  LOLOLOLOL!

LLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLL!!!!!

...and I only had to read the headline.  City must be trying to compete with Blight on America bank for most putrid national bank, which would put it in the running for most putrid bank world wide.

What a great story, Tyler.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 15:59 | 1566572 The Swedish Chef
The Swedish Chef's picture

Well, finally something good! Got me laughing pretty hard. Thnx, Tyler....

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:00 | 1566575 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Tyler.

Stop asking so many damn questions and just cash the fooking check already. The world is full of greater fools.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:08 | 1566607 Sancho Ponzi
Sancho Ponzi's picture

I wonder if this is how Timmay pays his mortgage?

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:15 | 1566627 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

With somebody elses money...

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 18:39 | 1566986 Iam_Silverman
Iam_Silverman's picture

"I wonder if this is how Timmay pays his mortgage?"

Probably not - but I'd sure like to see the check (or money order) he used to pay his taxes with!

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:00 | 1566577 machineh
machineh's picture

I'm gonna charge my mortgage to the Barack Obama 2012 Presidential Campaign Committee.

And even include a little 'Helping American Homeowners' blurb to make it look authentic, along with a Banzai7 donut logo.

I can't lose!

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 20:42 | 1567343 Payable on Death
Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:05 | 1566581 Mercury
Mercury's picture

Yeah, that sounds like a TBTF bank.  Just yesterday I was talking to a friend whose brother was living in Singapore last year working for Nestle or some place.  One day his HSBC account gets credited 70k Euros out of the blue.  The next day, another 40k Euros.  A couple days later a friendly private client services rep calls up and asks if he'd like to enroll in one of the bank's fantastic wealth management programs.

Uh...no thanks.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 17:04 | 1566757 M.B. Drapier
M.B. Drapier's picture

Yes. If (emphasis on if) Citi had a practise of quietly doing smallish but meaningful favours for Key Business Influencers, then it would be not surprising at all if no-one was keeping a very close eye on the bookkeeping for this goodwill program. Maybe it would also be not too surprising if no-one was putting much effort into ID verification, as that would also tend to generate paper trails and maybe piss off the KBIs. Again, I'm not saying there was such a program at Citi - and even if there was, there's no sign that the real Hank Paulson ever took advantage of it. But Citi might be a rock worth looking under.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:03 | 1566583 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

If he tried it twice before he succeeded, I have to wonder if he had inside help getting the payment accepted. Especially since he "distributed the proceeds to others."

Sounds like a racket to me. The only thing that could make it more interesting is the infamous Linda Green.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:04 | 1566587 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Someone might withdraw tens of millions from JP Morgan Chase Bank NY, pretending to be The Bernank, and buy gold and silver with the fiatski paper.

 

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:07 | 1566602 optimator
optimator's picture

They probably pass a bunch of these every day that are real, so the pretend one wouldn't draw any examination.

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:09 | 1566612 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

+ 1,000,000,000 BernankBux (worth 1/20th ounce of Au)

Tue, 08/16/2011 - 16:18 | 1566640 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Actually mortgage fraud of the institutional kind extends back at least 20 years. Spend some time with Catherine Austin Fitts for a primer on this Love Fraud American Style.

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