In New Levels Of Bizarro-Land-Ism, IMF Denies Its Own Rumor On Bond Market Intervention

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Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:18 | 1741685 mayhem_korner
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Whoops!  IMF showing its ace on the flop instead of the river...

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:21 | 1741705 Ahmeexnal
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Forget about shorting the markets. They will come out with contradictory rumours every 5 minutes.


Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:27 | 1741756 SMG
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I think all these rumors are an attempt by the Oligarchy to delay the crash a little bit longer until they and all their lackey's are in the positions they want to be in.   I think what all these unsubstantiated rumors over the past few weeks mean, is that the crash is very close and the powers that be want to make sure they have thei i's dotted and t's crossed before they pull their finger out of the dike.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:31 | 1741780 Ahmeexnal
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The only possible positon the oligarchs will find is on their knees, with their hands and head between wooden shackles, with a basket under their heads!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:46 | 1741849 fuu
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The kaishakunin would then perform kaishaku, a cut in which the warrior was decapitated. The maneuver should be done in the manners of dakikubi (lit. "embraced head"), in which way a slight band of flesh is left attaching the head to the body, so that it be hung in front as if embraced.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:31 | 1742003 Timmay
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There are many stories on record of extraordinary heroism being displayed in the harakiri. The case of a young fellow, only twenty years old, of the Choshiu clan, which was told me the other day by an eye-witness, deserves mention as a marvellous instance of determination. Not content with giving himself the one necessary cut, he slashed himself thrice horizontally and twice vertically. Then he stabbed himself in the throat until the dirk protruded on the other side, with its sharp edge to the front; setting his teeth in one supreme effort, he drove the knife forward with both hands through his throat, and fell dead.


Come on Bernanke, don't be a wuss.....

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:36 | 1742023 Timmay
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In his book Tales of Old Japan, Mitford describes witnessing a hara-kiri:[5]

"As a corollary to the above elaborate statement of the ceremonies proper to be observed at the harakiri, I may here describe an instance of such an execution which I was sent officially to witness. The condemned man was Taki Zenzaburo, an officer of the Prince of Bizen, who gave the order to fire upon the foreign settlement at Hy?go in the month of February 1868,—an attack to which I have alluded in the preamble to the story of the Eta Maiden and the Hatamoto. Up to that time no foreigner had witnessed such an execution, which was rather looked upon as a traveller's fable. The ceremony, which was ordered by the Mikado himself, took place at 10:30 at night in the temple of Seifukuji, the headquarters of the Satsuma troops at Hiogo. A witness was sent from each of the foreign legations. We were seven foreigners in all. After another profound obeisance, Taki Zenzaburo, in a voice which betrayed just so much emotion and hesitation as might be expected from a man who is making a painful confession, but with no sign of either in his face or manner, spoke as follows:

“ I, and I alone, unwarrantably gave the order to fire on the foreigners at Kobe, and again as they tried to escape. For this crime I disembowel myself, and I beg you who are present to do me the honour of witnessing the act. ”

Bowing once more, the speaker allowed his upper garments to slip down to his girdle, and remained naked to the waist. Carefully, according to custom, he tucked his sleeves under his knees to prevent himself from falling backwards; for a noble Japanese gentleman should die falling forwards. Deliberately, with a steady hand, he took the dirk that lay before him; he looked at it wistfully, almost affectionately; for a moment he seemed to collect his thoughts for the last time, and then stabbing himself deeply below the waist on the left-hand side, he drew the dirk slowly across to the right side, and, turning it in the wound, gave a slight cut upwards. During this sickeningly painful operation he never moved a muscle of his face. When he drew out the dirk, he leaned forward and stretched out his neck; an expression of pain for the first time crossed his face, but he uttered no sound. At that moment the kaishaku, who, still crouching by his side, had been keenly watching his every movement, sprang to his feet, poised his sword for a second in the air; there was a flash, a heavy, ugly thud, a crashing fall; with one blow the head had been severed from the body. A dead silence followed, broken only by the hideous noise of the blood throbbing out of the inert heap before us, which but a moment before had been a brave and chivalrous man. It was horrible. The kaishaku made a low bow, wiped his sword with a piece of rice paper which he had ready for the purpose, and retired from the raised floor; and the stained dirk was solemnly borne away, a bloody proof of the execution. The two representatives of the Mikado then left their places, and, crossing over to where the foreign witnesses sat, called us to witness that the sentence of death upon Taki Zenzaburo had been faithfully carried out. The ceremony being at an end, we left the temple.

The ceremony, to which the place and the hour gave an additional solemnity, was characterized throughout by that extreme dignity and punctiliousness which are the distinctive marks of the proceedings of Japanese gentlemen of rank; and it is important to note this fact, because it carries with it the conviction that the dead man was indeed the officer who had committed the crime, and no substitute. While profoundly impressed by the terrible scene it was impossible at the same time not to be filled with admiration of the firm and manly bearing of the sufferer, and of the nerve with which the kaishaku performed his last duty to his master.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 15:34 | 1742421 JW n FL
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Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:41 | 1742039 Sambo
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The CNBC observers are going to get freaked out reading this.....

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 14:28 | 1742174 Libertarians fo...
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I truly don't understand all this extreme and gruesome hostility. It's not just the "oligarchs" you hate the poor, too.  Hell, you guys even hate the middle class like teachers, police officers and fire fighters if they're in a union. Your hatred cuts through everyone:  from the oligarchs, to bankers, to the politicians straight through the middle class, down to the poor and down-trodden. You guys just hate everyone who exists outside your small sphere of extreme, goofy libertardian ideologies.  

Class warfare seems to be a popular topic these days, and you idiots are as guilty as anyone.  It's so hypocritical of you guys to accuse Obama of class warfare, when the comments section here at Zerohedge is littered with exactly that: class warfare against everyone!  The poor, the rich, the Republicans, the Democrats, teachers, blue collar workers.... everyone... you guys are at war with everyone.


Libertarians 2012:  Get Rid of the AirTraffic Controllers!    

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 15:22 | 1742381 fuu
fuu's picture

Why hello there liar boy!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 15:27 | 1742394 LongBallsShortBrains
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I love you.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 15:36 | 1742431 faustian bargain
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Trolltards 2012: Freedom Is Slavery!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 18:13 | 1743102 Jedi Longsabre
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Don't get rid of air traffic contollers. That might cause slight increase in accidents. Just privatize them like in those libertarian bastions Canada, Great Britian and New Zealand. Oh, yeah it can't be done because it is a union job, what was I thinking

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:40 | 1741831 Eagle1
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I agree, you are exactly correct. This whole thing is a staged event.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:43 | 1741839 PaperWillBurn
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I think the endgame is well underway, and the outcome is not saving the public, but managing the transition to a new system, while hopefully keeping the same ruling class. That will not be disclosed while 'the players' jockey for advantage and position, 'turf' and the privilege of rents, if you will, well ahead of the crowd.

The European Central Bank and the Federal Reserve will bail out the banks again, and seek an 'orderly resolution' to the Greek situation. This will involve either an overt or de facto devaluation of the Euro and the Dollar. Make no mistake, the Dollar will not be allowed to appreciate dramatically for the same reasons that all the other currencies wish to avoid such an outcome.

The Dollar and the Euro are the relativistic value expressions of the financial system. They have no substance otherwise, no permanence except for the will of keepers of the system. The DXY is only an expression of the Euro and Yen and a few other fiat currencies. They are created at will.

And so in advance of the coming devaluation, gold is hit hard in order to maintain the confidence in the fiat system, with the clumsy propaganda pieces in the compliant mainstream media, and so that when bullion rises in reaction to the currency devaluations it will be easier to control, as Paul Volcker had suggested.

"That day the U.S. announced that the dollar would be devalued by 10 percent. By switching the yen to a floating exchange rate, the Japanese currency appreciated, and a sufficient realignment in exchange rates was realized. Joint intervention in gold sales to prevent a steep rise in the price of gold, however, was not undertaken. That was a mistake."

Paul Volcker, Nikkei Weekly 2004

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:08 | 1741943 ElvisDog
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Make no mistake, the Dollar will not be allowed to appreciate dramatically for the same reasons that all the other currencies wish to avoid such an outcome

What? To protect the vibrant U.S. export economy? I find it amusing that after all that has happened over the past three years there are still some people who cling to the "Central bankers are omniscent" meme.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:36 | 1742020 Troll Magnet
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be careful thinking the end is near.  i've learned awhile ago not to fight the fed as they can fuck with you at anytime of their choosing.  they will drag this shit out for as long as they can because they know that IF/ONCE things implode beyond control, people will be coming for them.  

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 17:19 | 1742934 ElvisDog
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I do agree that the doom-and-gloomers usually get the timing wrong. They underestimate the ability of the status quo to keep the game going with a stick save. However, I disagree that the Fed is in control of everything and things are going according to some master plan.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:48 | 1741865 ghostfaceinvestah
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Agreed, this is also why they crashed gold prices, so they can pick up more physical before it all comes crashing down.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:52 | 1741882 ZeroPower
ZeroPower's picture

Crashed? You bugs seriously need to re-visit what crashes look like.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:53 | 1741890 junkyardjack
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The only safety will be treasuries

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:58 | 1741913 SheepDog-One
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Near 50% drop in silver is a pretty good crash.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:07 | 1741941 Ruffcut
Ruffcut's picture

Deny your denial, bitchezz.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:28 | 1741760 redpill
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We've always been at war with Eastasia.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:19 | 1741689 GeneMarchbanks
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IMFull of SHit.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:21 | 1741709 mayhem_korner
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Don't be so hard on yerself, GMB.  :D

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:39 | 1741818 Popo
Popo's picture

I believe the term is "crying wolf"

... and the thing about crying wolf is that is stops working eventually....

... and then the wolf eats your face off.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:50 | 1741873 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

It sure does Popo.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:19 | 1741694 wombats
wombats's picture


Who pays attention to the IMF baffoons?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:25 | 1741744 baby_BLYTHE
baby_BLYTHE's picture

Christine Lagarde is just a puppet and was handpicked by the Rothschild family to facilitate world economic plunder and wealth transfer.

G. Edward Griffin covers IMF fascism in great detail in The Creature from Jekyll Island. I Highly recommend every ZHer read his masterpiece.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:46 | 1741850 hussaifa
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Read it - I Second, Third & Fourth this comment.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:01 | 1741921 NotApplicable
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When that's finished read Carroll Quigley's "Tragedy & Hope: A History of the World in Our Time."

It's their freakin' playbook.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 14:44 | 1742257 ChemicalAli
ChemicalAli's picture

You're quite right, but you fail to mention that G. Edward Griffin plagiarized Eustace Mullins. 


Eustace Mullins had al the answers WAY before the fraud G. Edward Griffin.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:19 | 1741695 nyse
nyse's picture

Anyone interested in taking a swing at a pinata, here you go - BlackStone Outlook: Europe/US:

Comments reatled to slide 5 would be of particular interest to me.

Dare you try and refute the bull case? Well, I dare you.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:38 | 1741810 Panafrican Funk...
Panafrican Funktron Robot's picture

I put about as much stock in what Blackstone analysts say, as I do Morgan Stanley analysts.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:19 | 1741696 sabra1
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funny how this report came out after european markets close!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:03 | 1741931 NotApplicable
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It's almost as if they had a clock...

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:20 | 1741702 Fips_OnTheSpot
Fips_OnTheSpot's picture

Inverted rumors!!

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:20 | 1741704 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

This isn't surprising in that, spilling the beans on secret operations is usually frowned upon.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:21 | 1741714 SheepDog-One
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Layer upon layer of rumors and denials that rumors were rumors in the first place...the only thing that fuels the world markets today. Pretty scary.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:28 | 1741764 Quinvarius
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All they know is suddenly a big checkbook opened somewhere.  Someone blinked.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:21 | 1741717 Carl LaFong
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Is there really any difference whether they intervene directly in the EU bond market or loan the funds to governments or central banks to do the same?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:23 | 1741727 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

We dont have any clear idea how, but everyone is going to pay everyone else although everyone is broke but all is well anyway for today....que FT rumormill to provide next mad market momo spike.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:25 | 1741743 Fips_OnTheSpot
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legal strings? wait...

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:05 | 1741937 NotApplicable
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Every instrument has its own counter-party, so I'm sure there is lots of jostling for the best (read: safest) seat in the house.

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:24 | 1741735 carbonmutant
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Eurozone crisis is Mad Hatter’s tea party...

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:27 | 1741753 Money 4 Nothing
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Please tell me that was the last shit taco for the day?

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