Nonfarm Payroll Increase Less Than Expected At +80K, Unemployment Rate Drops To 9.0% Vs 9.1% Consensus

Tyler Durden's picture

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silver500's picture

Yes 9%, Everything is working!

God bless Obama

oh_bama's picture

ZEROHEDGE-----NOW IT IS THE RIGHT AND PERFECT TIME TO LOOK FOR REVISIONS!!!!!

paarsons's picture

I  said we would drop to 9 percent.

Everybody called me a cunt.

I was right again.

http://fucklloydblankfein.blogspot.com

Terminus C's picture

Who gives a shit about this number, it is quite obviously fabricated and means fuck all.

Perhaps you were called a cunt because you are, actually a cunt.

paarsons's picture

I'm quite the cunt.

In fact, cunt is my favorite word.

I'm a viking on his way to the 3rd bottle of soju.

I shall die soon.

But who fucking cares?

http://fucklloydblankfein.blogspot.com  

ThatThatcher's picture

You're  more than 'quite' annoying. Your blog sucks by the way :)

Benzass Miphist's picture

You are one hilarious disturbed motherfucker. Love your blog's cunt heavy prose. Never tried Jinro Soju but soon will. Maybe it will replace my two "Four Locos" when I mow the motherfucking lawn.

Raskolnikoff's picture

I wouldn't trust your mother-in-law nor eat all that crazy food she's sending you. My Mother-in-law is from Southern China, I'll only eat the stuff she makes when I need a laxative.

mkkby's picture

Why are they even bothering with all the 19 century stupid surveys?  They HAVE THE DAMN tax records.  A computer can count the number of workers in 2 seconds.

deez nutz's picture

hope and change, bitchez

depression's picture

Outstanding !

At this pace of "recovery" we should be at 8% throw in a 0.2 tenths drop or two and we could be at 7.5% by election day !

Keep up the good "work" you 99 weeker's falling off the back of the wagon, and a big shout out to our good friends at the BLS for those "timely" adjustments.

DarkestPhoenix's picture

My brother works for the Bureau of Labor Statistics.....he's an economics, statistics and political science triple-major, recipient of the Anthony Constantino Award in Economics and the smartest man I know.  He says they're hamstrung, and can't really report the real statistics, since their data gets skewed terribly.  His exact words to me were, "Nobody likes it when you tell them that real unemployment is at 22%."  He went on to state how the BLS does not factor in people whose unemployment benefits have expired ("The 'logic' is that they must not be looking for a job, so they aren't 'really' unemployed, they just choose not to work."), people who are not eligible for unemployment benefits or people who have recently graduated and cannot find work.  Basically, the 9% number is only people who recently lost their jobs and are still drawing unemployment.

mkkby's picture

Ask him this:

Why are they even bothering with all the 19 century stupid surveys?  They HAVE THE DAMN tax records.  A computer can count the number of workers in 2 seconds.

slaughterer's picture

Take that Joe Lavorgna. 

Archimedes's picture

Unemployment rate drops? So how many fell off the dolls? 300K?

GeneMarchbanks's picture

#occupy puttin the masses to work?

Hansel's picture

It worked in Oakland.  The mayor gave all public employees a paid day off to protest, except for all the cops, who were asked to work overtime to police all the new protesters. link

Dr. Engali's picture

Good job Joe Lavorgna. As usual you are the most wrong. You deserve a raise. I wonder what the birth/death number is.

BlueStreet's picture

And the scam rolls on.

virgilcaine's picture

999.. Its the hot number...Number Nine..Number Nine..

JPM Hater001's picture

You forgot the decimal. 

 

Unemployment in 2014 - 99.9%

TruthInSunshine's picture

While the devil's always in the details, and this jobs report and official miss, and even bigger, BLS "massaged" [i.e. birth/death record, dropped UEI rolls, etc.] report is far worse than is being touted, in even more depressing news, Canada lost 54,000 jobs, which is the equivalent of the U.S. losing 540,000, for the month.

Green shoots, eh.

DarkestPhoenix's picture

At that point, I may not be employed, but at least I'll have a stack with the same purity rating.

mkkby's picture

Possibly true if Obama's forced health insurance goes through.

junkyardjack's picture

The economy doesn't need it.  Didn't you read the report? Unemployment dropped, we're back to a booming economy...

depression's picture

Another side benefit here is, this kills any incentive to pass any part of the Obama Job's for America stimulus programs.

Put a fork in it.

mkkby's picture

I hear Obama's great new plan is for everyone to work part time so there's enough jobs to go around. /sarc

... only with the forced health insurance coming up in 2 years, it might not be such a joke.

TooRichtoCare's picture

it's a good number....notwithstanding the fact that the initial headline number is slightly below consensus.  Revisions to prior months, a major positive. A drop in unemployment.  (And also worth mentioning, the major increases in the Household Survey, which you can ignore if you want because it's a quirky & inconsistent number but if it shows consistent gains then maybe it has some smidgen of credibility?)

jdelano's picture

Are you kidding?  Anyone who pretends they don't understand that unemployment is dropping because thousands of the unemployed are falling off the end of 99 weeks and GIVING UP ALL HOPE OF EVER GETTING A JOB AGAIN is lying through their teeth.  This country is giving out its death rattle.  

jekyll island's picture

Do you ever wonder why GS is so good, yet when their bigshots leave for other companies they fail?  Perhaps being the head of the banking cartel and being able to tell the Fed what to do gives them an advantage.  Getting the employment data and knowing what the Fed is going to do ahead of time would be useful information, wouldn't it?   

chubbar's picture

I can show you consistent gains month after month if you let me change the scale on the ruler at will. That's all these guys do, continually modify the formula. How the fuck in gods green earth can anyone believe there is only 9% unemployment? Really, just how? You think not counting folks after a year looking for work is legitimate? You think counting folks who take a minimum wage job to put food on the table while proceeding to look for real work is legitimate? PHDs flipping burgers, engineers working checkout lanes, really? 45 million on food stamps? No one who follows how the BLS calculates unemployment believes the absolute bullshit being shoveled by our gov't. I've stopped paying any attention whatsoever to what comes out of any gov't agency.

This is one big smoke screen compliments of the BLS. They will use whatever formula is necessary to show under 10%. That's the big number that the US will never exceed as long as the scale to measure it is under the control of the politicians at BLS.

The Axe's picture

actually very small improvement with revisions...

Dick Darlington's picture

Gross on NFP:

*U.S. STILL IN AN ANEMIC, JOBLESS RECOVERY, BILL GROSS SAYS

rubearish10's picture

Still leaves US at the mercey of Europe!

apberusdisvet's picture

Financial services up;

health services up;

construction and manufacturing down.

UNSUSTAINABLE PATH TO RECOVERY

Cursive's picture

@apberusdisvet

This is the FIRE economy.  It's the only growth industries we've had for the last 20-30 years.  Sad.

Benzass Miphist's picture

Healthcare is up alright. But exploding numbers of previously privately insured patients now on motherfucking medicaid. The lesser numbers of insured patients can't even afford their copays and are foregoing needed care.

Cursive's picture

Meh.  I guess there's something for bulls and bears in this report.

fonzanoon's picture

We are going to be stuck in this ditch for a long time

rubearish10's picture

Could have been a "deeper ditch" if it wasn't for the FED, harr harr.

Dain Bramage's picture

I want Mark Zandi's job.  ALways bullish, always wrong, get paid lots of money.

Beam Me Up Scotty's picture

What a shill.  Its too bad I can't punch him in the mouth through the TV.

oleander garch's picture

Until the TBTF banks are shrunken enough to drown in a bathtub, there will be no improvement for the masses.  Too bad for them.

Sandy15's picture

That's because they are PAYING the OWS protestors.  If those morons were not getting paid, they surely wouldn't be sleeping in tents, cold and rain.  However it is NOT long term employment.  Remember the other protest in Wisconsin, we added jobs then but quickly lost them again.  LOOK at the numbers!!!

Ben Bermonkey's picture

BLS= Bureau of Liars Statistics

razorthin's picture

Maintain that trading range between the 200 and 50 DMA is the most optimistic goal the ponziclowns could hope for.  This should do it.

LoneStarHog's picture

BIRTH/DEATH = +ONE HUNDRED & TWO THOUSAND (+102,000) ?!?!?!?!?