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Obama Makes Secret Visit To Afghanistan On Anniversary Of Osama Death; Will Designate Country Major Non-NATO Ally

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Just when we thought the president didn't have any tricks left up his pre-election sleeve on the anniversary of Osama's death announcement, here he comes and surprises everyone with what has just been disclosed as a secret visit to Afghanistan, where in a televised statement at 7:30 pm Eastern, the president will announce a strategic partnership with president Karzai, and where he will designate Afghanistan a major non-Nato ally - the "first such designation of the Obama presidency."

From Reuters:

President Barack Obama arrived in Afghanistan on Tuesday to sign an agreement charting future relations with the country, making the secret trip on the first anniversary of the killing of al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden.

 

Obama plans to deliver a televised address to Americans later on Tuesday.

 

The U.S.-Afghan Strategic Partnership Agreement will set conditions for a U.S. presence there after a 2014 deadline for the withdrawal of most NATO combat forces.

 

As he fights for his re-election, Obama is seeking to portray his foreign policy record as a success.

 

His re-election campaign has made bin Laden's death a key part of that argument, and the president's visit to the country where militants hatched the September 11, 2001 attacks will reinforce that message. It also opens him up to criticism from Republicans, who say Obama has politicized bin Laden's death.

 

After leaving Washington under cover of darkness late on Monday and flying overnight, Obama arrived at Bagram Air Base before visiting Kabul.

 

He planned to meet with Afghan President Hamid Karzai at his palace and will later make remarks to troops at Bagram. From Bagram, he also plans to deliver formal remarks about the Afghanistan war at 7:30 p.m. EDT (2330 GMT).

 

Obama's speech will focus on the strategic partnership agreement and is likely to put an emphasis on his plans to wind down the costly and unpopular Afghanistan war where nearly 3,000 U.S. and NATO soldiers have died since the country was invaded in 2001.

 

After a U.S. troop increase that Obama ordered in late 2009, U.S. and NATO forces have managed to weaken Taliban militants, but the movement is far from defeated.

That's all great. Our only concern is for the secret service: considering the local conservative agenda, will there be enough entertainment for Obama's sworn protectors to distract themselves in the time before and after the president declares his foreign policy an epic success?

Well, there are always poppy seeds...

 

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Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:18 | 2388965 Troy Ounce
Troy Ounce's picture

 

 

Clown is still in the news?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:24 | 2388977 battle axe
battle axe's picture

So how big a check did he just hand Karzai? You know it has to be huge to buy off those rat weasels. Get our troops out of Afghanistan, we are BROKE. Also let us not forget, we are going to get sucked into that black-hole called IRAN.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:37 | 2389022 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

More MSM distraction.

Today is the REAL anniversary of unconscionable price manipulation in silver.  Prices fell more than 20% in a matter of minutes during off hours in the Asian market, followed by an unprecedented 5 margin hikes in 9 days.

Osama is the distraction to keep the US "reserve" ponzi going, silver represents freedom from Obummer and the fascists.  Which do you think gets reported?  This is all too surreal.  Even Hollywood has more success making citizens believe fairytales.

 

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:38 | 2389063 SHEEPFUKKER
SHEEPFUKKER's picture

Did Osama's body turn up yet? lol

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:56 | 2389125 Joeman34
Joeman34's picture

The real question is...  will the secret service now have an Afghani hooker scandal???

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:02 | 2389159 fockewulf190
fockewulf190's picture

Bullish for Ron Paul. Expect US military contributions to rise exponentially.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:12 | 2389195 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

He had nothing better to do... They were aerating the greens at Burning Tree CC this week...

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:35 | 2389232 ihedgemyhedges
ihedgemyhedges's picture

Tell me Putin isn't throwing shit all around his office right now.  The Russians got ran out of Afghanistan like the French retreating when fireworks go off and now we have an "ally" with poppy and rare earth minerals.......................amazing, huh?????????

PS TD mentioned poppy first.  And yes, I had a New Year's hangover and watched all 5 parts of this post:

http://www.zerohedge.com/news/presenting-exchange-stabilization-fund-5-parts-real-plunge-protection-team

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:33 | 2389554 smiler03
smiler03's picture

Afghanistan a major ally? I haven't heard anything so ridiculous since the last US GDP growth figures. 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 19:07 | 2389605 NeoRandian
NeoRandian's picture

Quite. Bomb a third world country into pre-stone age conditions, occupy it for 10+ years, install a puppet dictator, train its army to shoot your soldiers in the back and now its an ally? What type of ally? It has *no* GDP without US aid. It has *no* effective military. What good does it do us as an ally? If the entire population of Afghanistan disappeared overnight, we would actually get more benefit from being "allied" with it.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 22:40 | 2390060 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

i liked the show better when bush stuck something in his codpiece and strode across the deck.

Wed, 05/02/2012 - 04:02 | 2390439 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

I tried declaring my girlfriend a non-marriage ally, but my wife put the kabosh to that notion! :>D

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:15 | 2389397 Betty Swallsack
Betty Swallsack's picture

Pfft!  All I know is that should I ever be able to locate, and then shoot, either Sasquatch/The Easter Bunny/The Boogey Man/Santa Claus/The Keebler Elves/insert mythical crature here; I'm most certain that the very next step wouldn't be to dispose of it/them in a large body of water.....then claim that I did.

If you believe what the lamestream media presstitutes/white house souse are hawking, I have some of Saddam's WMDs to sell you.

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:56 | 2389127 resurger
resurger's picture

No problem BA, The Government can still print money & test new weapons on innocent civilians (Lab Rats according to the DOD)

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:54 | 2389473 12ToothAssassin
Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:21 | 2388990 Freeskier
Freeskier's picture

"Communism is when you are starved.  Fascism is when you are dinner." - Freeskier

http://freeskierpov.weebly.com/

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:32 | 2389033 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

 

 

This trip appears to be an Afghan and Camel show.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:40 | 2389070 Whoa Dammit
Whoa Dammit's picture

Nah, its the  'OPEium show. :-).

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:32 | 2389035 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

Ah, those staunch Afghan allies! With all their armored divisions, battlegroups, advanced EW knowhow, and all we have to do is give them several billion per month.  And they kill our men once in a while. Bother, that! Yup, another fine descision by our Dear Leader.

I see no reason they cannot be allowed to join NATO.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:34 | 2389048 Hedgetard55
Hedgetard55's picture

They only report those "friendly" attack incidents when someone is killed, they don't if just wounded or not hurt.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:56 | 2389123 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

It is beyond parody this time.   It's like he wants to rub the nations face in his doo for failing to love him enough.   Afghanistan has been a UN clusterfrack since the week after we routed the mullahs (easily), then years later Odumbo comes in and triples down on the cost of the whole stupid sharade with his surge-then-leave-by-a-fixed date plan.    To hell with the place and its barbaric tribal sheep shagging opium growing culture, unless they have some resources under their soil, in which case we should TAKE it.  They should thank the west for not exterminating them, and for preventing the soviets from doing so.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:45 | 2389266 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

I believe the Soviets decimated Afghanistan and still were unable to defeat the people there. The US will be well served to learn this lesson.

Estimates of the Afghan deaths during the 9 year Soviet invasion vary from 670,000 to 2 million. 5–10 million Afghans fled to Pakistan and Iran, 1/3 of the prewar population of the country, and another 2 million were displaced within the country. In the 1980s, half of all refugees in the world were Afghan.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:00 | 2389145 knightowl77
knightowl77's picture

Seriously...Afghanistan is supposed to be "a major ally" ????

What kind of crack is Obama/Osama on? Does this guy have ANY self-respect???

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:09 | 2389181 Grinder74
Grinder74's picture

It's not crack; it's opium.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 19:57 | 2389709 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

.

Seriously...Afghanistan is supposed to be "a major ally" ????

What kind of crack is Obama/Osama on? Does this guy have ANY self-respect???

His teleprompter told him that the American people are too stupid to know the difference between the bought-off bureaucracy in Kabul (which will remain an ally until the bribes aren't big enough) and the rest of Afghanistan, which will never be an ally of anyone since it's not a cohesive political unit.

As far as self-respect, it's probably equivalent to that of any other actor currently employed as a teleprompter reader.

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:58 | 2389134 mr1963
mr1963's picture

By the time the election rolls around Obama will have singlehandidly flown the helicopter (the one that did not crash of course), saved several helpless and hapless seal team members from certain death, planned the mission, steered the ship to dump the body, and of course, would have been the one to take the kill shot.

Anyone else long for the days when leaders like Eisenhower, Lincoln and yes, W didn't claim 100% responsibility for anything and gave credit to the people who actually carried out the mission? Or, didn't provide themselves an escape hatch by basically entering into a contract with the general in charge of the mission to take the blame if it went poorly?

This guy is a complete arse, no decorum whatsoever.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:06 | 2389171 TheGardener
TheGardener's picture

Clowns ruling the world. Or so they think they do.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:40 | 2389264 undercover brother
undercover brother's picture

The Manchurian Candidate strikes again!

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:49 | 2389466 DosZap
DosZap's picture

So the Taco in Thief went to visit his relatives?.How quaint..........................this last minute horseshit is fooling NO one.

Don't beat the hell out of me for 4yrs, and then say I am SO sorry!.

Pls forgive me,(until after my erection).

His NEW campaign slogan goes back many years the word (FORWARD), to Commies, and devout Marxist governments.................

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:19 | 2388970 Manthong
Manthong's picture

So does the secret service adapt to the local customs there and go for the boys?

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/dancingboys/

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:22 | 2388993 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

No, that's probably the #1 reason there won't be any SS scandal during this little shindig.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:44 | 2389086 Whoa Dammit
Whoa Dammit's picture

However, the sheep and goats do have their back legs crossed in fear.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:32 | 2389039 RafterManFMJ
RafterManFMJ's picture

Ancient Arab saying, "A woman for children, but a boy for pleasure."  Hold on - Obama's making them our treasured ally is making MUCH more sense...

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:36 | 2389051 Manthong
Manthong's picture

They may not be as adverse to youthful gayness as some would like to believe.

http://onenewsnow.com/Politics/Default.aspx?id=1585206

                      http://cnsnews.com/node/56196

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:20 | 2388973 Mad Max
Mad Max's picture

This could provide the shortest timeframe yet for a country to go from major ally to major enemy.

It does not seem that the Afghan people or army particularly like the US.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:24 | 2389000 duo
duo's picture

I suppose a visa waiver program for Afghan tourists is next.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:20 | 2388978 brewing
brewing's picture

pre-empting american idol? sacrilege...

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:30 | 2388979 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

YGBFKM ~ This will go down as Obama's "Mission Accomplished" moment...

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:20 | 2388980 youngman
youngman's picture

Funny....no actually sad....this after the bloodiest month for our servicemen ever in the theater.......but then again Obama cares less about the servicemen...only himself......does anyone know how many were killed last month....no you don´t because the MSM does not report it anymore now that the Socialist is in power....but if it was Bush..it would be every day and every hour...

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:26 | 2389011 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

You have to want it to see a difference.

US citizen collin powell admit that for the iraqi war, the US military did not bodycount (the killed 'enemy')

The free press suspended reports on casualties the very same they are doing for Obama.

Obama is your typical US citizen president. Even though he is light on personal power exercize due to being a negro.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:43 | 2389084 machineh
machineh's picture

You type "surprizingly" well for an AnEncephalic! (look it up -- prolly not in your ESL course book)

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:59 | 2389137 viahj
viahj's picture

know much about tieneneman square?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:05 | 2389170 knightowl77
knightowl77's picture

I do know that more Americans have died in Afghansitan in the 3 years 3 months that Obama has been president than in the 8 years Bush was prez...but where are the Anti-War protestors now? Where is Code Pink? Where is the press trying to get pictures of the fallen servicemen returning to Andrews AFB?

 

But but he does have a Nobel Peace Prize....

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:22 | 2389217 marathonman
marathonman's picture

The press are safely tucked away in BHO's back pocket.  Or under his desk ala Monica Lewinsky.  It's gotta' be pretty crowded there.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:41 | 2389568 smiler03
smiler03's picture

American Casualties in "Operation Enduring Freedom" also known as Afghanistan...

http://icasualties.org/OEF/USCasualtiesByState.aspx 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:21 | 2388982 gimli
gimli's picture

Wow --- I just formed a strategic alliance with my local Dunkin Donuts this morning --- Barrack and I think alike.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:20 | 2388983 Jonas Parker
Jonas Parker's picture

"... where he will designate Afghanistan a major non-Nato ally - the "first such designation of the Obama presidency."

 

I think I'm gonna puke!

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:34 | 2389046 Steaming_Wookie_Doo
Steaming_Wookie_Doo's picture

Celebrating the 1 yr (fake) anniv of a Zbigniew Brzezinski stooge's supposed death. Did you see the story this a.m. where Osama had "put out a contract" on Obama. Puhleeeze! Ya think OBummer will be marking the anniv of that copter-load of SEALs (involved in the Bin Laden cleanout) who mysteriously died shortly thereafter?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:30 | 2388985 LongSoupLine
LongSoupLine's picture

No matter how far away he travels from Chicago, he'll still be a Chicago politician...crony feeding crook.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:21 | 2388986 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

The poppies must flow

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:56 | 2389129 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

Is opium being genetically modified?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:39 | 2389263 Arkadaba
Arkadaba's picture

Most likely

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:21 | 2388987 Joebloinvestor
Joebloinvestor's picture

I wonder who he can fundsraise with over there?

Maybe we will catch a break and he will fucking stay there.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:21 | 2388991 Joebloinvestor
Joebloinvestor's picture

Secret Service needs to replenish their poppy collection......

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:24 | 2389001 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

Hamid Karzai... This US citizen's election was so rigged that even the other US citizens had to admit the election was rigged.

Quite an accomplishment.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:24 | 2389004 GS-DickinDaMuppets
GS-DickinDaMuppets's picture

Maybe it's just me, but Prez Obozo is one sick puppy when it comes to foreign policy...

 

...doing GOD's work....GS-DickinDaMuppets

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:27 | 2389426 lotsoffun
lotsoffun's picture

the guy has a nobel peace prize.  so shut up.  he's the world's greatest asset.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:29 | 2389430 lotsoffun
lotsoffun's picture

from kenya, to indonesia, to hawaii to chicago to d.c.  we are all very fortunate.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:26 | 2389005 I Am Not a Copp...
I Am Not a Copper Top's picture

OSAMATERRORTERRORTERROROSAMATERRORTERR...you get the picture

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:29 | 2389006 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Most favored drug nation status.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:22 | 2389527 zerozulu
zerozulu's picture

You can call Afghanistan what ever you like but that country is the empire's grave yard.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:26 | 2389007 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

This is all just a diversion.

PBS Frontline tonight 2nd part of Money, Power and Wall Street: with an inside look at how the Obama administration, including a divided economic team, has handled the crisis and how the financial world has returned to many of the practices that created the meltdown in the first place....was set to air tonight.

Teleprompter-in-Chief may prempt. This IS NOT a coincidence.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:29 | 2389026 battle axe
battle axe's picture

Obama and his people are a little too slick for that. It would be too heavy handed. 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:37 | 2389054 brewing
brewing's picture

or too fucking stupid to think it up...

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:00 | 2389141 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Too heavy handed for the president whose speechwriters dared moot that we'd look back at the moment of His election as the moment when.... the seas began to fall?    

Too heavy handed for the handlers who put him amongst the styrofoam greek columns?

 

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:41 | 2389074 Village Smithy
Village Smithy's picture

Part 1 was, I thought, very well done. It did however make me feel like puking...again.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:57 | 2389335 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

Part one was a puff piece. Tried to make Jamie Dimon look like a savior. I guess PBS doesn't want to lose its corporate sponsorships.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:34 | 2389434 SoCalBusted
SoCalBusted's picture

...not to mention showcasing Krugman as an "expert"

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:27 | 2389013 Dealer
Dealer's picture

With allies like this, who needs enemies?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:28 | 2389014 Mercury
Mercury's picture

...in a televised statement at 7:30 pm Eastern, the president will announce a strategic partnership with president Karzai, and where he will designate Afghanistan a major non-Nato ally - the "first such designation of the Obama presidency."

Is that above or below major NATO non-ally?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:28 | 2389018 ZeroPoint
ZeroPoint's picture

Non NATO? What a joke. How many soldiers from how many NATO allied countries are running around Afgahnistan?

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:28 | 2389024 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

Not enough to be counted as a NATO major ally?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:00 | 2389150 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Being included in NATO would be an insult even to Afghanistan's mockery of an army.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:28 | 2389019 DonutBoy
DonutBoy's picture

Can we get some campaign photos of Obama operating a drone?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:28 | 2389020 Let The Wurlitz...
Let The Wurlitzer Play's picture

I cant wait to see the banner behind Barry tonight while he is speaking...

"Mission Accomplished"

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:30 | 2389029 youngman
youngman's picture

A month after we leave...there will be a coup...and Shiaria  law will be imposed....done...a non Nato enemy again

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:01 | 2389156 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

No need for a coup, the current regime is good with sharia.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:48 | 2389580 smiler03
smiler03's picture

But the current regime doesn't go round blowing up historic monuments, shame on them. 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:31 | 2389034 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

OBAMA DEBT LADEN

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:44 | 2389089 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Hello Sailor!

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:33 | 2389556 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Dude, do one of Barry in spec ops gear whacking Tim bin Laden!

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:31 | 2389036 penexpers
penexpers's picture

Where's Williambanzia7's image of Obama in front of a massive opium field gaurded by black-clad Darth Vader-ish police?

Wed, 05/02/2012 - 02:26 | 2390373 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Should be this field.. after all, Emerald city is on the other side.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RG2keYgBiZc

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:32 | 2389037 penexpers
penexpers's picture

Hahaha! Look at my timestamp and William's...

The force is strong with us both.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:33 | 2389038 metaforge
metaforge's picture

Hey Hamid - all your natural resources are belong to us!

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:33 | 2389041 kralizec
kralizec's picture

Will he say Afghanistan "punches above their weight class"?  LOL!  Pound for pound, Obama is both the biggest lightweight and the most full of shit!

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:34 | 2389042 DavidC
DavidC's picture

Obama - forgive my language but a fucking hypocrite 'We don't want to make mileage out of bin Laden's death'.

DavidC

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:34 | 2389043 onthesquare
onthesquare's picture

So the United States president is the head of NATO.  What next? they will think they run the united nations.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:35 | 2389049 machinegear
machinegear's picture

Friends like these, who needs enemies?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:03 | 2389162 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.  

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:18 | 2389209 machinegear
machinegear's picture

Point taken, and the US has that covered and then some!

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:36 | 2389053 Sturm und Drang
Sturm und Drang's picture

I wonder if they disarmed everyone since POTUS was in the house and protected by Secret Service.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:37 | 2389058 Hedgetard55
Hedgetard55's picture

I hope if he speaks to the troops he makes them disarm first, like Panetta had to do.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:38 | 2389065 Metalredneck
Metalredneck's picture

Gotta keep that opium flowing.  More campaign contributions from the needle...

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:44 | 2389085 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Oh, ObaMao has a strategic partnership....who gives a shit?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:44 | 2389090 digalert
digalert's picture

Got to cement that ally relationship, you betcha, US troops grow the best opium. No shit! Our soldiers helping grow opium to help the Afghanistan economy and maintain status as the worlds top opium producer...and they told us it was al Qaeda?

http://publicintelligence.net/usnato-troops-patrolling-opium-poppy-field...

https://www.cia.gov/library/publications/the-world-factbook/fields/2086....

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:04 | 2389167 pods
pods's picture

Dope money makes the world go round.

Dope money lubricates the dirty wheels of our intelligence apparatus.

Ask Gary Webb. Wait, he shot himself.  Twice.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gary_Webb

pods

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:46 | 2389092 undercover brother
undercover brother's picture

secret meeting with karzai, secret deal with Russia.  how many more secrets were there that were actually kept?  this guy should scare the crap out of every american.....and even some of you non-americans

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:53 | 2389102 ThisIsBob
ThisIsBob's picture

Good move.  We get natural resources and a wee bit of land for a pipeline.  Not to mention the continued destabiization of Iran with plentifull herion, which, by the way, is about 50% of the GDP.

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 15:57 | 2389131 lincolnsteffens
lincolnsteffens's picture

This is great news. The lone outpost of Kabul where the hunkered down "Government" has to have US Military protection to survive is going to be a strong ally and help us fight the rest of the world that we don't pay off. On top of all that, Afghanistan is a great ally in fighting the war on drugs!

You can't make this shit up.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:01 | 2389147 Whoa Dammit
Whoa Dammit's picture

Obama's speech tonite:

"The friend of my enemy...Uh, no that's not how it goes... The enemy is my friend..Uh, that's not it either,..Well, I tell you, if I had a wife... Uh, she would look just like Karzai....Wait, that's ....Hey!! can't somebody get my teleprompter to work in this shithole country?...

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:25 | 2389231 owensdrillin
owensdrillin's picture

Now that's fucking funny.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:00 | 2389148 onlooker
onlooker's picture

 

The Big Lie works. Obama is the big lie. Obama does not work, he is broken. What is wrong with this picture.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:02 | 2389149 Alcoholic Nativ...
Alcoholic Native American's picture

The news this morning was non stop Bin Laden.  Quite impressive.  

 

Adam Yahiye Gadahn, the american who was pretending to be Usama Bin Laden for the majority of the post 9/11 Al-Qaeda releases because you know, Usama was dead wrote in 2007....

""Since the 11th, many of America's policies have come under the influence of the Mujahideen, and that is by the grace of Allah, the Most High. And as a result, the people discovered the truth about it, its reputation worsened, its prestige was broken globally and it was bled dry economically, even if our interests overlap with the interests of the major corporations and also with those of the neoconservatives, despite the differing intentions."

"And for your information media, during the first years of the war, lost its credibility and manifested itself as a tool of the colonialist empires, and its condition has often been worse than the condition of the media of the dictatorial regimes which march in the caravan of the single leader.""

Adam pretty much hit the nail on the head.  Jihad until judgement day bitches.  Allahu Akbar.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:06 | 2389174 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

The MSM is acting on orders from the Obama campaign after it attempted to spike the football over the military killing Bin Laden, a fait accompli practically speaking, as to the President's choice in the matter.   He couldn't have called off the strike and remain President.   Still, he managed to fuck it up for us maximally, for example with the supposed burial at sea story.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:14 | 2389199 Alcoholic Nativ...
Alcoholic Native American's picture

They probably summoned him into a room and informed him, guess what! You are going to kill Osama Bin Laden today, put on your serious face.

Obama has 6 feet of dirt on him, don't expect anything from this clown but business as usual.

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:29 | 2389545 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

"Although I have been critcised for only working 6 hours a day, I must now reveal I have secretly trained as a chopper pilot and spec ops killer. I built the assault chopper myself, designed a new bullet and hand loaded all our ammo. I flew to A-stan in a U2, shooting valuable photos on my way. Once I was there, I singlehandedly flew my hand-built chopper to Bin Laden's opulent palace, where, in fluent Arabic, I pleaded with him to surrender. He went for his rifle and I was forced to kill him at 20 feet with one shot right between the eyes. After saving the lives of my back-up crew, I flew out in my special chopper and personally saw Bin Laden was recylcled to use again when we need an enemy. Mittens would never be able to do this! You must re-elect me as Premier!"

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:06 | 2389172 CryingBear
CryingBear's picture

yay!!!

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:24 | 2389223 boeing747
boeing747's picture

If this is secret visit, then it means situation there is still as bad as before.

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:29 | 2389238 orangegeek
orangegeek's picture

Obama can campaign all he wants.  If the markets tank, Obama is out.

In 2004 Bush was relected - bull market.

In 2000, Bush was elected (by a smidge over Gore) - changing of the guard - bear market.

 

In 2008 it was Obama's turn.

 

By the look of this weekly chart, Obama is going to be looking for a new job by November.

 

http://bullandbearmash.com/index/sp-500/weekly/

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:42 | 2389271 Jake88
Jake88's picture

They shut Bin Laden up nicely. Embarassing and damning stories will never be told.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:52 | 2389315 Bagbalm
Bagbalm's picture

The Afgans are killing our soldiers, but hey, that's what they do in Chicago and LA when they come home too. If they were any better friends they could vote for him. (Crap, I shouldn't give them ideas.)

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:00 | 2389338 alfred b.
alfred b.'s picture

 

  Well, at least now I know why I saw Obama's picture on a milk carton this morning....!

   Plus I can just imagine the Pentagon mafia rolling over with laughter...their ship has just  come in...

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 16:58 | 2389348 Cult of Criminality
Cult of Criminality's picture

"As he fights for his re-election, Obama is seeking to portray his foreign policy record as a success."

Huh ?

ROFLMAO

Funniest shaat I have heard all day thanks

BAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAAAAAAA

Laughing so hard tears are streaming  BAHAHAHAHAHAA

Live the dream,Rock on Bro Ahahahahahaaaaaaaaaa

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:00 | 2389355 Fix It Again Timmy
Fix It Again Timmy's picture

Nothing like having an army that runs on hashish for an ally - "Semper High"........

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:09 | 2389391 dexter_morgan
dexter_morgan's picture

hookers and hashish for all!

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 17:16 | 2389406 MFL8240
MFL8240's picture

The US clown back on TV to show off his one accomplishment.  Opps, forgot, it was Cheney and Bush who caught Bin Laden, and the Navy Seals who kiled him. Obama was playing golf!

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:10 | 2389506 spekulatn
Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:20 | 2389519 jonjon831983
jonjon831983's picture

Well, this is a sneaky way of maintaining presence in the region.  The friend you don't want to stick around the house.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:21 | 2389526 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

Secretly, uder cover of darkness, Barry, under orders from HRH QE of England, secures an agreement with Hamid over the dope fields.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 18:43 | 2389574 Fix It Again Timmy
Fix It Again Timmy's picture

Barry flies nearly 10,000 miles to sign a gourd with Hamid Krazy?  What the hell is that all about?

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 19:08 | 2389611 Norma Lacy
Norma Lacy's picture

April Fool's Day on mayday...   He must have gotten a new weight belt - how else could he sink so low.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 19:15 | 2389624 Dr. Gonzo
Dr. Gonzo's picture

I thought we were still at war with Afghanistan and were still getting shot at, shot down, bombed, ambushed, ect. How exactly do you make someone who you are still in the process of invading and subdueing your best ally? Does Hallmark make a card that says: " I know you all hate us and want us to leave and or die. I know we said we were just coming to get a boogie man. I know we're stealing the lion's share of your opium and I know we plan on stealing all your minerals and setting up pipelines...but would your puppet dictator we installed for you be our puppet dictator's best friend for a photo op?"  I can't wait to see this triumph heralded in the USSA fake nightly newscasts. 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 19:29 | 2389642 djsmps
djsmps's picture

And as Hitler toured Warsaw, he announced that he was designating Poland to be the first non-Aryan ally.

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 19:40 | 2389663 booboo
booboo's picture

Obama: "watch this, I bet I can make a May Day speech from a Muslim country and the americans will clap like seals"

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 21:35 | 2389874 supermaxedout
supermaxedout's picture

Bin Laden was never the reason why Afghanistan was invaded. The reasons were oil, gaz, copper, gold  etc, etc. Not that the US would have needed these commodities that desperately  but it was necessary to control this stuff in order to maintain the Dollars reign, which is equal to world dominance.

And from the very beginning South Pakistan which is separating Afghanistan from the sea was on the wish list too. This region which was for a short time even an independent state, before Pakistan was founded and finally took over this region called Belouchistan/Waziristan. Before WWII the Brits already wanted to build a railway into this area to get the riches from this region.  My opinion is that they wanted to make this region also a vasall mini state like Quatar, Kuwait or Brunei, so that they can easily and "legal" extract the riches from these territories far away from the UK.  Poor countries with natural riches. They can never enjoy their riches because the big guys are in the game.

I doubt that there exist one man (local)  in Afghanistan who regards himself as a friend of the Americans or Brits or any other Nato soldier. In the opposite whole Afghanistan hates them from the bottom of their heart.  The reasons are simple but for Westerners hard to understand, because they do not live anymore in a real extended "family" as the Afghans still do (tribal society). But its really simple. Imagine, you grow up among your cousins and uncles, sisters and aunts and all love each other and live in peaceful harmony. You really enjoy it to live among your relatives when growing up. You feel protected and not alone.  The law and peace is provided by the family head and there is no greater crime than not to defend whole heartely the honor of the familiy which includes all familiy members without any exception. The base of the family is the emotional togetherness plus the outspoken law to defend or take revenge for each and every member of the family. No matter what a member of the family did, he can be a murderer or criminal. It does not matter at all.

Revenge is not something hot blooded. Its cool and planned. And revenge gives their lives a sense. They live and wait for the moment of their revenge. It may take twenty years to wait till "their" man is making a mistake and then they are there. Its a conspiracy of a whole familly and families are related with other families with the same structure. These related families are allies and do secretely assist each other.

Now just count how many families in Afghanistan have lost already a beloved member.  Most probably each and every family.  Therefore it is without doubt, that the highest wish and desire of all the Afghan people is to kill foreign soldiers. They only do it now not so often because its to dangerous and endangers the whole familiy.  But when the time comes then comes the time.

Under these prerequisites its clear why the war in Afghanistan had to be continued over at least one generation. Without the total destruction and the eradication of the familiy and tribal structures the US/UK can not be succesful. They have to fight the civil Afghan society. Its there one and only enemy. There was not an Afghan army existing the US could fight. An Afghan army is what the US is trying to establish but as a matter of fact they are giving arms to their most deadliest enemies who hate them with all their hearts. 

 

Tue, 05/01/2012 - 22:50 | 2390091 2tired 2share
2tired 2share's picture

Wow! Shocked and amazed! Thanks for the art William! Omama must be really hitting the campain trail, at least over there. AlQueida, is done? Wooo Hoo! Kiss My Booty. I feel so safe? Not too mention how many Dollars did he packed  for his lunch meeting with Karzai? Anyway love this site this is my second time posting, and I always enjoy reading each and every one of your blog posts. However Omama can bite me!

 

 

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