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Obama Wants His Drone Back

Tyler Durden's picture


Several days after being humiliated by Iran which either shot down a EQ-170 drone, or worse, hacked into its navigation system and landed it, Obama has decided to double down, and stick the other foot in his mouth. As ABC reports in connection with Obama's handling of this embarrassing predicament, ""We've asked for it back. We'll see how the Iranians respond," Obama said at a news conference. Obama said he wouldn't comment further "on intelligence matters that are classified." Great, the only problem is Iran will never return it, as they have already indicated, for the simple reason that it has already been reverse engineered 5 ways from Sunday somewhere deep in the bowels of one of China's unpopulated cities, which just doubles as a very populated military intelligence base. The only good news is that within 6-9 months every American will be able to buy a personal stealth drone for a new low, low price at their friendly neighborhood Wal-Mart. Our only concern is whether FoxConn will be able to handle the supply of both iPads and straight for re-export drones: it would be ironic if this massive military embarrassment ends up as being a catalyst to short Apple.

From ABC:

A senior Iranian military commander, however, said on Iranian television Sunday that not only would Iran not turn over the drone, but warned of a "bigger response" to the "hostile act" of crossing into Iranian airspace.


"No one returns the symbol of aggression to the party that sought secret and vital intelligence related to the national security of a country," Iranian Islamic Revolution Guards Corps [IRGC] Lt. Commander Gen. Hossein Salami said, according to Iran's Fars News Agency.


U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton said told reporters today that "given Iran's behavior to date, we do not expect them to comply" with Obama's request. Defense Secretary Leon Panetta also said he didn't expect Iran to hand over the drone, but told reporters, "I think it's important to make that request."


Several Iranian state-run media reports claim the country plans to "reverse engineer" the RQ-170 Sentinel and "will replicate the captured U.S.-built stealth aircraft in the future." In another report featured on Iranian television, an Iranian lawmaker claimed the country's experts were almost finished extracting data from the drone and would be using some of it to file a lawsuit against the U.S. for its "invasion," according to a report by The Associated Press.


"Military experts are well aware how precious the technological information of this drone is," IRGC Aerospace Forces Brig. Gen. Amir Ali Hajizadeh said last week according to local reports. "It can play a key role in Iran's intelligence interactions with the U.S. rivals."

On the reason of the "interception"

According to U.S. officials, the drone was on a classified surveillance
mission for the CIA in western Afghanistan when operators lost control due to a malfunction. From there, the drone glided into Iranian airspace before crashing.


The Iranian military initially claimed it had "shot down" the drone, but later said it was able to bring it down with relatively little damage through an electronic attack. Pentagon spokesperson Capt. John Kirby told reporters last week there was no indication the drone was brought down by "hostile activity of any kind."

As for the top secret drone itself...

The Sentinel, an unarmed long-range surveillance drone known as The Beast of Kandahar, was such a closely held secret that the U.S. Air Force did not even acknowledge its existence until late 2009.


Panetta said it was unclear what technological value the drone could still have, depending on its condition.

Here's a guess: the non-technological value may be low but the barter value is enough to where Iran will leverage it to get anything and everything from the Chinese, to whom the technological value will be quite enough.

And as a reminder, here is the Iranian video of the captured drone:


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Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:11 | 1972236 user2011
user2011's picture

If Obama return the Nobel peace prize, Iran shall return the drone.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:16 | 1972253 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Euro might not survive christmas:


Jacques Attali, the former president of the European Bank for Reconstruction and Development, said that the euro would only last before Catholic Christmas. There is no more than a 50/50 chance for the euro to survive until this Christmas, the economist said.


This means war with iRan will be launched before christmas.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:51 | 1972365 mophead
mophead's picture

The Iranian military initially claimed it had "shot down" the drone, but later said it was able to bring it down with relatively little damage through an electronic attack. Pentagon spokesperson Capt. John Kirby told reporters last week there was no indication the drone was brought down by "hostile activity of any kind."


Don't believe any of this stuff. The plane was delivered to them intact. The Illuminati puppet masters play both sides of the field. What will Iran  do with the drone? Hand it over to Russia and China. The development of the predator drones will come back to haunt us, literally. You are witnessing propaganda in preparation for WWIII.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:06 | 1972427 pods
pods's picture

I am a bit more worried that they will be freely flown around the US and that Russia or China is not to blame.


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:19 | 1972469 Iam_Silverman
Iam_Silverman's picture

"I am a bit more worried that they will be freely flown around the US"

Already happening according to a recent Drudge Report link.  I am hoping that this will help to nullify this threat to Americans fourth amendment rights by making the controlling signals known to all - for jamming or outright takeover of nosy drones.


On the other hand, I agree that it was flown into Iranian airspace and "gifted" to them.  Most probably to give them dated technology or to wow them with our abilities.  I would find find it amusing if while they are deconstructing it an unexpected detonation occurs.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:27 | 1972489 nmewn
nmewn's picture

"Already happening according to a recent Drudge Report link."

I wonder how an .06 or 7mm works on em.

And finding a taxidermist to stuff one of those suckers must be a real chore ;-)

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:38 | 1972520 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Foxconn should have a functional equivalent of this, being built alongside iPads, in about a year, sold to anyone and shipped free, for the low, low price of 1/800th of whatever it cost the U.S. taxpayers (now that the very bloated MIC R&D and testing was already covered).

It's just like when Lipitor goes off patent, only more so!

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:07 | 1972588 nmewn
nmewn's picture

It would be cool wouldn't it. Our own citizen drone fleet...the

Clearly, this calls for a blue ribbon panel of experts to be formed and then come forward with a proposal of a brand new regulatory body formed under DHS. Quickly adopted in the dead of night in a last minute omnibus spending bill of course.

Well, it was fun while it lasted.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:11 | 1972600 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture



A drone droning about a drone.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:14 | 1972604 nmewn
nmewn's picture

You lose your puppy or sumpin?

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:32 | 1972636 Triggernometry
Triggernometry's picture

C'mon, give it back!


Pretty Please??

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:35 | 1972773 Atlas_shrugging
Atlas_shrugging's picture

Far more embarrassing are the videos of the Iranians parading around the captured miniature drone pilot, blindfolded and unaware of the mass rioting, chanting and screaming obscenities at him for being an American dog.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:48 | 1972797's picture

I suspected that there was a tiny little Francis Gary Powers in there.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:16 | 1973531 Bicycle Repairman
Bicycle Repairman's picture

Wake up Wolf Blitzer.  He's needed to host a new ABC show.  "Nightlight: Day XX, America's Drone held Hostage".  Oh, the humanity.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:40 | 1972641 Doña K
Doña K's picture

One thing that is hard to explain is the choice of color. This looks more like a 3rd world country color. I am thinking this is not American made. Maybe it's Iranian made out of styrofoam. The grille is such low tech. and the bottom which can reveal spying cameras and weapons is purposefully hidden from view. Maybe it's a replica sent there as a practical joke to see Iran's reaction.

No matter what it is and whoose it is, it's there for the viewing world for propaganda to the sheeple. Welcome to the United states of entertainment. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:58 | 1972819 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

Too bad it's now always about fighting and killing.

Awesome would be if the drone suddenly popped up a video projector, and played some funny stuff. Like a Mickey Mouse cartoon. A true Onion Moment.

I mean, just look at the pure theatrics of asking for it back. Perhaps, next, the US will ask countries it has bombed to return unexploded munitions?

The theater has really been reduced to the absurd, clearly targeted at the Lowest Common D!



Tue, 12/13/2011 - 07:19 | 1973132 Element
Element's picture

Or it plays back, "help me Obi Wan, you're my only hope."

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:14 | 1972841 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

The lower part was hidden from public view by the iRanians in order to conceal the fact that this model does not sport a landing gear.  This motherfucker levitates!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:46 | 1972900 Bartanist
Bartanist's picture

Would explain the lack of damage, eh?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:52 | 1972903 old naughty
old naughty's picture

Yea...scripted like Jeff Gold-blum (funny name) and Will Smith flew into alien space to plant a virus in Indpendence Day...sweet. Ha.

May be they did flew the dummy drone in under a captured Iranian aircraft. Ha. Ha.

So poker play by Obumma. Show me the "real" mccoy? Ha. Ha. Ha.

Entertainment at its best. Absurd, said ORI.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 07:16 | 1973129 Element
Element's picture

Yeah, was wondering about that metal-primer colour myself ... an unpainted prototype? ... or a radar absorbant applique? ... that just happens to look like a messed-up nappy.

Bazza, you sure you want this back?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 07:31 | 1973148 BigJim
BigJim's picture

When compared to the photos of the RQ-170 that I've seen, this does indeed look like a plastic mock-up. It's shint white, whereas the photos suggest it's normally a matt gray. Which makes me wonder.... did the US build a 'mock', low-capability RQ-170 to fly over Iran, so the Iranians would/could down it, thereby providing a pretext for escalations when they (inevitably) refuse to hand it back? And also... give the Iranians a false sense of their own capabilities? So they think the can see/down an RQ-170, when in reality, their skies are full of them, flying around undetected?

Or did the Iraninas build the mock-up themselves? Because the actual drone was badly damaged on landing/crashing? Or because the original has already been shipped to China?

Once you start pondering this stuff, the possibilities are endless...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 08:35 | 1973242 bombimbom
bombimbom's picture

and the most plausible possibility being the one you and others bizarrely try to deny. Iran has got his hands on a real RQ-170S.

I agree with those who think that Russia and China will be thankful and happy. and that's the best profit Iran will take from it.

I should warn you americans that Iran is the bite too big to chew that could turn the composed downsizing of the US hegemony into a harsh collapse. much like WWI for the UK empire and WWII for the european powers. Especially China is waiting and salivating.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:35 | 1973627 BigJim
BigJim's picture

Nice mischaracterisation of my post.

What I'm discussing is why the Iranian 'RQ-170' doesn't look much like any of the photos we've seen.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:58 | 1974160 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Those are interesting thoughts bombon.
A US harsh collapse means europe turns back to feudalism in the best case scenario.
The other option is turning into a caliphate.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:37 | 1972656 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 I always pay attention. +1  Patience is a virtue?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:26 | 1972755 trav7777
trav7777's picture

an .06?  Are u nuts?  These things fly well beyond small-arms range and you won't even know it's up there nor be able to hit it.  You'd need AA guns to hit one and the fkin thing is you gonna even see it?

The doctrine for shooting at aircraft with small arms is the static wall of fire principle...anyone thinking that a rifle with a maybe 400 yard effective range is going to down an aircraft is a total fool

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:04 | 1972828 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 Check Tepco. And Cyclone season in the Southern Hemisphere. { sp ?}   Merry Christmas!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:39 | 1972892 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Makes sense now.

Ogolfer's base in Australia is not to piss off China.  Seems like major evac will take place down under.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 04:52 | 1973042 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

You really have no clue what you're talking about do you? a 6mm only has an effective range of 400yards now? LOL! Moron.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 07:24 | 1973137 BigJim
BigJim's picture

Aimed straight up?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:24 | 1973577 msamour
msamour's picture

There's a machinist in the US that made a Gatling gun with .308 barrels. If you tied an electric motor to the hand crank. I bet it would take it down eventually. There are a number of very smart people. Not only that. I know of some kids that are developing sound seeking rockets as school science project. If you can see it, or if you can hear it you can take it down.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 05:38 | 1973071 hunglow
hunglow's picture

Hooper: That's a twenty footer.
Quint: Twenty-five. Three tons of him.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:28 | 1972490 Paul Bogdanich
Paul Bogdanich's picture

Obama sounds like a guy that kicked a soccer ball over the fence.  Hey, ya mind tossing that back?  What a tard.  Of course they are not going to give it back. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:01 | 1972649 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

We asked for it back.

He forgot to mention the recon strategy that the military had considered to take it back.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 06:20 | 1973097 Potemkin Villag...
Potemkin Village Idiot's picture

We asked for it back.

Exclusive breaking News!...

Ahmadinejad's reply...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:01 | 1972696 sosoome
sosoome's picture

and Hillary announces they probably won't give it back...well duh.

The entertainment value is priceless.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 06:28 | 1973102 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

Monica Lewinsky could have given Hillary a mouthful of Clintonesque if things were arranged a bit differently.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:50 | 1972805's picture

It's at the Alamo. In the basement.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 02:48 | 1972981 covsire
covsire's picture

Lib media is still out there calling Obama a smart man.  The farce continues.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:47 | 1972669 Cathartes Aura
Cathartes Aura's picture

Homeland Security is giving out .gov fiat loans to help the local policing forces get their very own drone - I think Texas is one of the first to add it to their arsenal, and other state Congress-critters have voted to allow them access to airspace. . .

with all those aerosoling jets, getting a bit crowded up there - wonder if the drones can see through the aircrap?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 06:29 | 1973104 ToNYC
ToNYC's picture

Occupy mylar-lined tents.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:49 | 1972800 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

My suspicion is that those remote controlled drones are extremely susceptible to electronic override by an very strong signal.  That plane had no visible damage and it's not built to fighter jet standards.  It's basically a monster sized REVELL model.  I think Iran figured out how to take over the controls and flew that sucker in for a nice, smooth landing.

Doesn't bode well for the next 'Shock and Awe' campaign, does it?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 02:25 | 1972949 ServingMyKing
ServingMyKing's picture

They may be susceptible to jamming but the bird would fly home if control was lost.  No way to override, the communications would be encrypted and uncrackable.  Hard to think of a scenario where the intact bird ends up in enemy hands by accident.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 06:06 | 1973084 smore
smore's picture

That bird won't fly!

The Dead Drone sketch
By Pepe Escobar

CIA spook: Oh yes, the, uh, the RQ-170 ... And your information is incorrect, that was in eastern Afghanistan. What's, uh ... What's wrong with it?

Journalist 1: I'll tell ya what's wrong with it, buddy. It's dead, that's what's wrong with it.

CIA spook: No, no, it's uh ... it's resting.

Journalist 1: In the freaking Iranian desert? Look, buddy, we all know a dead drone when we see one, and I'm looking at one - in Iran - right now.

CIA spook: No, no, it's not dead, it's ... it's restin'! Remarkable drone, the RQ-170, ain't it? Beautiful radar-evading piece of technology, right? Can't tell you more about it because it's classified.

Journalist 1: "Classified" doesn't cut it. It's stone dead.

CIA spook: Nononono, no, no! It's resting!

Journalist 1: All right then, if it's restin', I'll wake it up! [Shouting at a joystick] 'Ello, Mister Dodo Drone! I've got a lovely fresh IRGC [Iranian Revolutionary Guards Corps] target for you if you just show ...

[CIA spook hits the joystick]

CIA spook: There, it beeped!

Journalist 1: No, it didn't, that was you hitting the remote control!

CIA spook: I never!!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 07:26 | 1973141 Element
Element's picture

And if they can do it to that (if they did that is), they maybe also able to do it to cruise missiles now that all the new upgraded varients support realtime datalinks and can be continuously re-targeted in flight.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 07:53 | 1973173 fajensen
fajensen's picture

Well, since at least 2005 the military has been using COTS (commercial, off the shelf) hardware and equipment. The control systems are therfore Made In China, probably the US part of the design, the software f.ex., would likely have involved several exceptionally gifted Chinese engineers.

This is why "we" are reduced to bombing rubble into smaller rubble and fighting tribespeople: Any real opponent would just buy the "kill-codes" from the PLA via the Chinese clone of ebay. All credit cards accepted.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:56 | 1972563 Cabreado
Cabreado's picture

The simple fact that Lies not only usurp technology in net influence, they exploit it full-tilt along the way... that is where to place your worry -- whatever worry you have left to give.

The Simpleness of lies and their destructive force, so forgotten.


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:14 | 1972605 NewThor
NewThor's picture

The simple fact is...

If you lose your Spy Drone in hostile territory, you don't ask for it back. EVER.

another thought,

IF 9/11 had never happened, would America be so willing to have an army of drones?

We've got a $500,000 drone here in Texas now patrolling the skies.

This backs up my theory that good sci-fi writers were actually prophets.


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:28 | 1972630 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Regardless as to whether everything's an illusion, designed to keep divide & conquer as a strategy alive, I see a future of mankinds inexorable proclivity towards war and violence fought with gnat sized drones, possessing more raw computing power each than a now modern Apache, blackening the skies.

Disposable, super-advanced, silent, swarming killers, blackening the skies, bitchez.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:41 | 1972662 Royal Fleming
Royal Fleming's picture

those things are old tech....join the 21st  nano about a swarm of them over Iran..try shootin one of them down..or hackin em...future bitchez...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:25 | 1972754 erg
erg's picture

How about nano-tech RFID dust.

Last chance saloon for free humanity.

Anyone ever see the bigdog in action? Creepy. Relentless.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:01 | 1972694 Cabreado
Cabreado's picture


I'm sure that there are some good sci-fi writers, but it seems you misconstrued my comment.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:25 | 1972863 NewThor
NewThor's picture

I was not disagreeing with you, sir.

Just adding another simple fact to your simple fact.


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:58 | 1972566 mophead
mophead's picture

I am a bit more worried that they will be freely flown around the US and that Russia or China is not to blame.


In a war scenario you can have it both ways. "Uh, no sir, that was not one of our drones that blew up all those innocent Americans, it must of have been the Russians". We will go to war with Russia. I've been saying this for over a year here on ZH.

I believe this card explains the predator drones:


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 02:33 | 1972963 Freddie
Freddie's picture

The thing looks fake.  The web has plenty of pictures of that model and it is looks somewhat like it but not that close.   Why is the teleprompter islamic lying?

I wonder if FoxConn cane make a home teleprompter game like the RockStar home game?  You can make all these BS speeches like the islmo puppet.  Say lines like "eat your damn peas!"

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 03:19 | 1973002 Capt Tripps
Capt Tripps's picture

Does stupid hurt?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 05:04 | 1973048 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Sadly, it doesn't seem to be painful to the carrier. :>(

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:05 | 1973306 prole
prole's picture

Lol not much I can add to that, but if the teleprompter is so Islamic, why doesn't he just ring up his fellow Mohammedin Amedinejad, and ask him for his frisbee back?

I believe it is in Islamic law that if a Moslem brother ask for help you must or somehow ~will?!~ provide it.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:01 | 1974172 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Yeah, tell that to the Sunni and Shiite. Brotherly love, like Cain.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 04:04 | 1973020 e2thex
e2thex's picture

There's a different game being played here.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 06:22 | 1973101 IamMarla
IamMarla's picture

it has a dent on the left wing ridge and several scratches. it was for sure hacked and had a system interrupt. the thing fainted and fell out of the sky onto some kind of soft ground. The Swiss asked politely for the US to have it back in private last week. It is one of the toys the US would have liked to keep quiet with its shark skin cloaking capabilities. the thing likely does not need a battery or power source. I have to laugh because it has nothing to do with the present American Administration at all. It has to do with a defense department in the throws of defections and corruption and likely much more. fun to watch from afar.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 08:43 | 1973253 Momauguin Joe
Momauguin Joe's picture

"Asking for the drone back" is so ridiculous that what initially smelled like a Trojan Horse is now plain as day.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:01 | 1972409 mophead
mophead's picture

Jacques Attali, the former president of the European Bank for Reconstruction and Development, said that the euro would only last before Catholic Christmas. There is no more than a 50/50 chance for the euro to survive until this Christmas, the economist said.


This means war with iRan will be launched before christmas.


My sources told me that something significant would occur on or a couple of days before christmas. Without any details given, it might be the Euro crisis or war with Iran, or both. Though I lean towards a Euro crash or beginnings of a crash. I stated this on ZH on December 1 2011.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:25 | 1972485 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Something significant to be announced tomorrow near Geneva.

G-d particle is now being mass produced.

Pb + Higgs -> Au + X

Transmutation bitchez!

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:07 | 1972587 mophead
mophead's picture

Let me add a little more. The plan/plot is intended to spoil Christmas so as to start the new year on a bad foot (which is putting it lightly). 2012 is intended to be very tense. Though I believe the hammer will drop after Obama is re-elected.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:55 | 1972909 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

I think Ogolfer needs major unseemingly never ending war before elections. It's the only chance he's got to give 4 more years of Hope and Change.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 02:16 | 1972940 Bartanist
Bartanist's picture

Yes, according to Lindsay Williams, Obama has promised everyone that there will be war with Iran no later than Sept/Oct of 2012. The Teleprompter needs it to ensure his election victory because no sitting president has EVER failed to get re-elected during a major war. 

However, the hope is that all of the covert sabotage the US and Israelis are pressing on Iran will cause them to get mad and strike out. Then the US will falsely claim Iran is the aggressor and attack. Most likely if Iran does not strike out another false flag event will be play-acted by the US government and Israelis and that will be the excuse. (the odds on favorite is for the US government false flag event to happen in Atlanta)

The biggest question is whether it will be WWIII and how extensive it will be. The Russians have already armed the Iranians with high speed missiles to take out the US ships in the Perisan Gulf and outside the Straits. So, the navy will be used as a sacrifice to the Teleprompter's re-election campaign.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 02:59 | 1972991 Tom Servo
Tom Servo's picture

I have always assumed the war would be the pretext to declare martial law / a draft of all unemployed folks and college loan, government debt slaves.  Oh by the way, we're cancelling the November elections until this rough patch is ironed out.  Win / Win / Win.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:56 | 1974150 Faulkner
Faulkner's picture

Why Atlanta?

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:56 | 1972560 Chupacabra-322
Chupacabra-322's picture

Just paraphaseing Gerald Celente but doesn't hey say something to the effect of "when all else fails they take you to war". 

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:58 | 1972567 americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

December 24 is the dark of the moon. Ideal time for aerial attacks. Merry Christ-what-a-mess y'all.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:20 | 1972733 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

The Euro could go almost anytime...but the Iran War is not yet. Right now there's one US Carrier Battle Group in the eastern Med, one in the Persian Gulf. Not nearly enough firepower, even with an Israeli add-on, to prevent Iran from shutting down the Hormuz Straits, hammering the oil terminals, and killing the dollar. When it goes to 2+2 CBG's, maybe 2+4, some combination like that, then it's BigWar. Still won't work....but ZOG is determined to try.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:31 | 1972766 trav7777
trav7777's picture

Syria goes first...then Iran.

To do Iran is going to require some kind of uprising that we can "defend" and some kind of signon from "the Arab League" and shit like that.

Once we build the coalition for cover, we move.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:08 | 1972829 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Something is wrong in the picture. There's no way China+Russia will sit this one out.

Why take out the long range missile R&D lab and then have the media declare that the explosions must have been an accident.

iRan would not admit their site was demolished by foreign forces (pride, major sin) so they just never aknowledged the fact.

Will that be used as cover when iRanian nukes "accidentally" explode in situ?

Then we will have the MSM racist media declare "See, we told you brown people should not play with nukes. Now lets go over and take Paki's nukes before they blow themselves up like the ayatollahs.".

This way iRan is taken out, without a real declared war, negating China+Russia the cover to enter in iRan's defense.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:12 | 1973513 Bicycle Repairman
Bicycle Repairman's picture

Catholic Christmas?  What's the other one?  Unitarian Christmas?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:05 | 1974200 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture


Now go back to your trailer and keep watching "Dancing with the Stars".

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:50 | 1972371 SHEEPFUKKER

Please return it, or I'll start bombing for reals. Sincerely yours, Obummer. 

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:17 | 1972464 erg
erg's picture

I think the literally heartless ghoul Cheney suggested the same thing. How old is this tech exactly? It seems that by the time we ever get a wind of such things it's 10 or 20 years old.

By now they're probably totally autonomous and able to communicate with each other.

That's crazy.

Batshit DARPA crazy.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 07:47 | 1973165 Element
Element's picture

Yep, it looks like it's pre-desktop PC old. Would not surprise me if it really is old.

I read a few years back that LockMart were examining the feasibility of developing a prototype F-35 version that was fully autonomous, with the weight and space savings from having no regular cockpit or pilot support system and avionics, then used to support a tactical laser.

And this possibility is clearly not out of the question because at about the same time the USN did in fact develop and demonstrate an autonomous refueling system for fighter jets, where the pilot no longer had to do the refuelling, the F/A-18 did it all by itself.

And the implications are that this means is you have an large unmanned low observable autonomous refueller, and a flight of autonomous F-35 fighters, with lasers or JASSM-ER stealth cruise missiles circling off your maritime EEZ 24/7 ... and you probably wouldn't know it.

Which therefore means, expect a lot more anti-satelite weapons and anti-drone systems and tactical lasers to appear, to deal with them quickly.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:21 | 1972474 European American
European American's picture

Did you say "start bombing for reals" or "start bombing for Israels?" or is that what you meant, were implying, cuz they're just frothing at the mouth for any excuse to get rid of those "revisionists".

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 02:50 | 1972982 saiybat
saiybat's picture

Obama makes another address to Iran

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:51 | 1972376 chunga
chunga's picture

When the "facts" come out it will be learned that the drone was on a humanitarian mission and Obama will earn another Nobel peace prize.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:52 | 1972377 SilverRhino
SilverRhino's picture

I would pay real money to see President Ahminijihad (or however it's spelled) say that on Iranian national television.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:10 | 1972723 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

he wants his approval rating back too

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 03:34 | 1973013 mr_T
mr_T's picture

Finders keeperzz biatch.

Thatz like.. a peeping tom taking pictures and videos of ur wife and knocking on the door to get your gear back after they ripped it out of the wall. At first I thought it was a hoax. Now I believe they really do have it. How did they get it in one piece... Electronic RF hijacking? This is much more embarrassing than the U2 incident.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 04:07 | 1973025 gangland
gangland's picture

Obama wants his groove back. fixed.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 06:31 | 1973105 Papasmurf
Papasmurf's picture

Clawbacks bitchez!

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:11 | 1972238 sunnydays
sunnydays's picture

I Love it.  Can't wait to get one at Wal- mart!  I will wait in line for that!

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:43 | 1972343 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

No need to do that; will have them by the end of January.


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:12 | 1972447 holdbuysell
holdbuysell's picture

Just be careful of those overzealous mobs. If a woman used pepper spray to get an Xbox, what will some consider using to get a (used to be) top secret drone?

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:13 | 1972242 Catullus
Catullus's picture

Oh man.  if it could deliver the mail....

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:21 | 1972269 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

And fetch beers from the corner convenience store.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:32 | 1972309 Mae Kadoodie
Mae Kadoodie's picture

And scratch my ass.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:05 | 1972423 Teamtc321
Teamtc321's picture

With a few adjustment's, I would name it Robo Blow Jo..........

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:21 | 1972473 Iam_Silverman
Iam_Silverman's picture

"if it could deliver the mail"

I wonder if it hasn't already delivered a message of some sort.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:29 | 1972495 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Take me to your leader.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 05:59 | 1973081 Potemkin Villag...
Potemkin Village Idiot's picture

if it could deliver the mail....

That's what it was doing in Iran in the first place...

It was delivering a 'Happy Kwanzaa' card from the TOTUS & his wife to Ahmadinejad...

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:16 | 1972252 savagegoose
savagegoose's picture

lol you can have it back, w're flying arounbd washington, all you have to do is hack it,  check out  some of our recent photos...

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:31 | 1972306 scatterbrains
scatterbrains's picture

not cool man.. i clicked on the link and now some defense algo has me patterned as person of interest for visiting ZH/Ron Paul/Whitehouse building google satellite view.


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:41 | 1972337 Bwahaha WAGFDSMB
Bwahaha WAGFDSMB's picture

Whew, thanks for the warning.  I was about to click the link when I saw your post.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:06 | 1972832 geekgrrl
geekgrrl's picture

Dude. Everyone in the country already has a very thorough dossier, and ZHers get the nice red folders. :-)

What I find not cool is all these damn drones. I heard a story this morning that some folks "stealing cattle" (yes cattle) that wandered onto their farm in North Dakota were busted by drones. Terrorism? Hardly. A legitimate dispute. Yet the police immediate go to the drones. It never was about those muslims, it was always about keeping Americans in line. It's about the militarized police state. It's about the American Nazi's that never went away at the end of WWII, who have taken over the country and yet nobody seems to notice. It's just mind boggling. IMO, oathkeeper/militia folks are in the crosshairs; this is just a practice run. Ultimately, they are coming for all of us, anyone who dares to speak up. But at the end of the day, well, I take that back, pretty much any time of the day I'm a loudmouth muckraking speaking-truth-to-power sort of person. So I'll see you in the camp?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 02:01 | 1972919 old naughty
old naughty's picture

Good one, GG. So, needs to know how to use the aya-to-la guards to control the masses.

Lo-tech transfer. Done.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 02:27 | 1972956 geekgrrl
geekgrrl's picture

LOL. You can worry about Iran all you like. I'm much more concerned with the douchebags who think they're running this place.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:09 | 1972439 European American
European American's picture

Hey Look, there's Barry getting cornholed by Reggie on the WH roof.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:30 | 1972633 calgal
calgal's picture


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:57 | 1972818 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

How is it that GoogleEarth blocks out the buildings (and Antartica), but Google itself lets you count the Secret Service Agents and where they're staked out?

Maybe the HS should raid Google as a terrorist accomplice.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:17 | 1972255 JustObserving
JustObserving's picture

What is the chance that US will return a drone violating US airspace? The audacity of hope never ceases to amaze me.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:33 | 1972292 DormRoom
DormRoom's picture

zero chance of Iran returning drone to US>


Iran will give the drone to China. And China will continue to U.N. veto, and protect Iranian interests.


Pakistan gave China pieces of the downed stealth blackhawk used to kill Bin Laden  Now China will have the drone, and reverse engineer the fuck out it.


Stealth & material technology all in one package.


Worse, China can analyze the onboard communication system, and learn how to hack it.  They already have been able to hack US satellites.  So it's possible China could use some hacked satellites to infect drones.


Also China already has the RSA key built into most defense subsystems.


Could you imagine what would happen if US drones are hacked, and start bombing friendly combatants?


China just leveled up with this drone.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:36 | 1972318 cynicalskeptic
cynicalskeptic's picture

Want to bet China was already involved helping Iran on this ?  There were reports of a hacked operating system some months back.... revenge for Stuxnet?


As far as bombing allies goes... Isn't Pakistan already po'd that we HAVE killed Pakistani Army troops?   No need to hack in for that....we're already killing the wrong people on our own.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:39 | 1972330 DormRoom
DormRoom's picture

The only thing that would make sense is if the drone itself has a stuxnet variant payload for China.


It's suspicious that the drone was downed, but the US didn't send in black ops to destroy it.


If I were Iran, or China I'd watch out for a payload in the drone that would infect their computers.


The US would love to cripple China with a stuxnet virus, like they did Iran, without any bombing, or military action.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:10 | 1972414 Rynak
Rynak's picture

Let me put it this way: ANYONE inspecting enemy software in a non-sandboxed environment, deserves to get fucked.

Then again, considering your post further down (the US military using stoneage RSA encryption, crackable by anyone who can use google), it would appear that technical incompetence is a quite popular thing.

Which in turn is ironic - a few month ago, i got into contact with someone who historically has been quite involved in the "elite of compsci", and personally among many things worked on the eurofighter project.... and who explained, that the US military (and recently banksters) have been the biggest employees of the IT market.... a while back having 33% (THIRTY-THREE PERCENT!!!) of the IT-employment marketshare.....

... and the outcome is stuff like RSA and Stuxnet? WHAT THE FUCK??? What kind of incompetent horde of morons are they employing anyways? Do they have something like a flatrate on the majority of the most incompetent IT workforce, or something?

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:34 | 1972512 omniversling
omniversling's picture

Good way to deliver a payload of Morgellons (for blood curdling transgenic horizontally gene-transfered Advanced Biological Weapons see:

I'd be nowhere near such a prize without a full CBW HazMat kit if I was an Iranian official...all of a sudden the entire military command, scientists and technicians in Iran/Chian/Russia fall down dead with a mystery flu 2 weeks from now...

Sue for Peace now...urgently, before something truly out of all proportion consumes all of us not in the Owners Club.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:37 | 1972654 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

Have you never worked for the government? There's a reason we don't want them to run our health care, financial system etc.- they are inept. Sometimes there are brilliant exceptions but most the government has people dig holes then fill them in. Everything is in done in triplicate on outmoded equipment with more career advancement coming from attending a ethnic sensitivity seminar than from accomplishing a goal. This is why we DON'T want them to have more control over us.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:37 | 1972673 Rynak
Rynak's picture

That's right, i haven't. I didn't expect them in the current system to overally result in more than "below average" efficiency, but i - at least in matters critical to fortify the power of the system itself - did not expect them to deliver a quality, that seem MULTIPLE DECADES back in time. Mea culpa.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:30 | 1973358 fnordfnordfnord
fnordfnordfnord's picture

After the last few years, I think there's a much stronger case for having the inept replace those who are currently taking us all to the cleaners.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:36 | 1972516 Arrowhead
Arrowhead's picture


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:22 | 1972475 Seer
Seer's picture

People have been poking these things for a while now.  Nothing new except that we now have "headlines" that get to use "Iran."

Insurgents Hack U.S. Drones $26 Software Is Used to Breach Key Weapons in Iraq; Iranian Backing Suspected

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:34 | 1973367 fnordfnordfnord
fnordfnordfnord's picture

Iraq; Iranian Backing Suspected...

Look, anybody could have loaned them 26 bucks. I'm just saying.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:37 | 1972325 john39
john39's picture

Yeah, maybe zato would finally get the fuck out of all the countries it shouldn't be in.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:41 | 1972336 Rynak
Rynak's picture

Sorry, but there is no way the most important US military comms, are secured by mere RSA encryption.... that would be like a stupidogasm.


... or ***IF*** that is the case, goodbye USA.... you just managed to get owned for unquantifiayble (infinite) technical incompetence alone.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:53 | 1972374 Rynak
Rynak's picture

google 1 : US military security 0

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:58 | 1972392 seek
seek's picture

Erm, the video downlinks for the drones were unencrypted until very recently.


Multiple stupidgasms.

The good news is that most of our military won't turn on us, and the ones that do will face a pretty large base of sophisticated hackers in the US, so the toys may not work quite as planned. TPTB drinks a little too much of their own kool-aid sometimes.


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:15 | 1972456 DormRoom
DormRoom's picture

sssh.. don't tell Rynak.. ddude's vein is already bulging.  this news may send him over the edge.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:28 | 1972482 Rynak
Rynak's picture

See, i don't expect bleeding-edge competence among the workforce of govs. After all, most of the people making decisions, have no fucking clue about the matter. But i would have expected at least a state-of-the-art that is about 15years behind.......

...this instead is just... anyone even halfway competent - actually, anyone competent enough TO USE GOOGLE, can crack their comms.... and in the case of the earlier drones, even anyone just capable of understanding digital video codecs (formats) (in a perverted way, that someway makes sense: if you don't have any significant security, you may as well spent no money on security at all).

I guess, i'm just amazed how this stuff has not resulted in any disastrous failure. Let me guess: Mutual incompetence? So, any county with at least 50% of military strikepower can beat the USA, just by being able to use google and knowing ahead of time everything they're gonna do?

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:45 | 1972538 seek
seek's picture

No disastrous failure because of the ultimate, biggest secret.

If anyone is around your computer, shoo them away, what I'm about to tell you is top secret, NOFORN, SCI shit.


We really don't have any enemies. We haven't for a long time. So a secret part of the government makes them up so we have someone to fight. Occasionally they try to piss off someone enough to attack, so we can point at a non-made-up "enemy." But really, no one is out to get us and everyone just wants to be left alone.

Remember, don't tell anyone. Burn your computer screen after reading this.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:37 | 1972640 Rynak
Rynak's picture

"We" (in the case of the USA, not really applying to "me") may not have any "attackers" who can beat BOTH "our comms AND force", but that does not mean, that the USA and its related "friends" do not have enemies.

Bottom line: Good point, even if perhaps taken too far. The overall "point" of you stands though - given material <insert your favorite term> force, there may not even be the need for significant comms security, simply because of raw physical force (which not only includes military force). So, "we" may be able to dominate nations even while doing it in the (technically) most stupid and low-tech kind of way available to "us".

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:55 | 1972680 dwdollar
dwdollar's picture

STAY WHERE YOU ARE. The SWAT team is on their way.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:46 | 1972356 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

DormRoom asked:

Could you imagine what would happen if US drones are hacked, and start bombing friendly combatants?

The unhacked ones have already been doing that in Pakistan for months.


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:42 | 1972532 willien1derland
willien1derland's picture

Send a couple of fully armed drones to Wall Street & take out the offices of the FRBNY, Goldman Sachs, JPM, Citi, BoA, MS & the rest of the financial terrorists work areas including the optic fiber lines & infrastructure installed to support HFTs overnight while the banksters are in their homes dreaming of their year end bonuses...BUT PLEASE LEAVE THE OFFICES & Studio of CNBC as I would LOVE to see those bunch of hacks explain away the events...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:06 | 1972707 UpShotKnotHoleGrable
UpShotKnotHoleGrable's picture

goddam i think i love comment ive seen since july 2007.

bring on the drones then, where is anonymous when you really need them.

bring on the drones, this aint gonna be no ddos attack. lower Manhattan = target rich environment.

cnbs is in new jersey, fast money would have plenty of time for reaction, before hellfire.


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:28 | 1972491 Sizzurp
Sizzurp's picture

I have always suspected the Chicoms hacked this thing from the ground in Iran and then landed it.  Iran gets the propaganda bonus and China gets the drone on the down low.  Whatever the case, it's a huge intel prize for china, and a disaster for us.  My guess is that thing had to be operating deep inside Iranian airspace.  No other reason to risk an asset like that for a mundane mission against the Taliban.  We keep seeing further escalation of this covert battle, so it probably won't be long before it shifts to overt action.  At this point both sides have a very light trigger cocked and ready.  The euro crisis isn't helping either.  All the stars are aligning so to speak and the full moon rises.


BTW, alittle something for Ron Paul fans

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 05:04 | 1973047 NidStyles
NidStyles's picture

Why would China have to go through that effort? They can just pull the damn thing off the assembly line there. You are aware that all of the electronics are made there now right?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:24 | 1972750 monmick
monmick's picture

What if it's a Trojan horse?

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:48 | 1972367 xela2200
xela2200's picture

Obama is just talking because He has to. Did we ever get that U2 back? Or is Fidel still using it as an ashtray?

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:08 | 1972592 IQ 101
IQ 101's picture

Just observing,the US sent back 12 Mexicans last year for violating US groundspace, why would they not send back airspace observers from Bangladesh or who ever will be droning us with our own tech in a month or three.

It will all end with drone battles over the West coast, more fun than a drunk stripper.

This all smells like horseshit, no?

it is a glorified model aircraft. has a few neat light cameras,satellite linky thinky thing and some heat sensory stuff is my guess.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:18 | 1972258 Cheesy Bastard
Cheesy Bastard's picture

drone1    /dro?n/ Show Spelled[drohn] Show IPA noun

1. the male of the honeybee and other bees, stingless and making no honey.

2. a remote control mechanism, as a radio-controlled airplane or boat.

3. a person who lives on the labor of others; parasitic loafer.

 Obama wants his drone back?  I didn't even know Michelle left.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:17 | 1972737 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

4. a mindless worker or sales person - Urban Dictionary 

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:17 | 1972259 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

i heard a short audio of bilary when i checked the radio @ mkt close and there was quite a bit of laughter from reporters when she said the request for t iran to return it had been made but she wasn't expecting compliance...

could this be a trojan drone?


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:25 | 1972288 nonclaim
nonclaim's picture

What if the drone is real but not the real thing? A flying honeypot, for lack of a better metaphor.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:52 | 1972378 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

What if it's actually a flying teapot, piloted by pot head pixies from the planet Gong?


Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:26 | 1972487 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

Trojan drone with a suitcase nuke on board.  Just waiting for the right time to blow Ahmadinejad to his meeting with allah.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 22:25 | 1972480 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

everytime a zeroHead touches his/her joystick, it is monitored by 9 different spy networks

every stroke, too

err,...keystroke, BiCheZ!

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 23:04 | 1972580 americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

And a big raised middle finger to them all! May they all get cancer and die a painful lingering death.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 01:20 | 1972854 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

I caught the spooks turning on my webcam recently. Thank you noisy firewire iSight.

Now I understand why all laptops come with integrated webcam. Those are silent, users never imagine they are being surveilled.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:27 | 1972294 Fish Gone Bad
Fish Gone Bad's picture

+1  That has been my thought since this story broke.  Not only is it NOT a stealth drone, it is actively gathering information.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:34 | 1972320 scatterbrains
scatterbrains's picture

or did some software company leak the code so Iran could intercept and land it and thus kicking of World Drone War-I  and thus kicking up demand for bigger better software.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:35 | 1972321 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

While also dishing out STUXNET to every bluetooth able smartphone within reach.

Mon, 12/12/2011 - 21:44 | 1972347 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

I'm not certain, but I believe stuxnet is a windows based entity.

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!