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Obama's Latest Bailout Plan Summarized In 4 Words: "3000 Bucks For Thingamajigs"
For those who missed Obama's post-NFP sermon on Friday, here is a summary of the Keynesian-in-Chief's latest plan to fix the country: $3000 for everyone to buy "thingamajigs." We wish this was a joke.
The farce gets going 25 seconds in.
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NOBAMA 2012 ! ! !
NOBAMA NOROMNEY 2012!!
Meet the new boss, same as the old - http://articles.cnn.com/2008-02-13/politics/bush.stimulus_1_rebate-checks-economic-stimulus-act-stimulus-bill?_s=PM:POLITICS
"The package will pay $600 to most individual taxpayers and $1,200 to married taxpayers filing joint returns, so long as they are below income caps of $75,000 for individuals and $150,000 for couples. There is also a $300 per child tax credit.Watch Bush sign stimulus bill into law"
Hope and change kickin in.......finally!
O's got electrolytes, bro.
My thingamajig automatically goes up every morning and down when I go to sleep.
Ladies and gentlemen, fellow Americans, good citizens of the world. You have heard me speak about our rapidly increasing Federal deficit. You know that I have come out against the wasteful spending that characterizes our government, and you know that I feel that our inability to address the cause of our escalating debt is due to a lack of leadership in Congress and the failings of the Bush administration that I inherited only a few short years ago.
Good people of America, did you ever ask yourself, "What would I do if someone suddenly dropped three thousand dollars in my lap, right now?" Folks, three thousand dollars is a lot of money. I know what you could do with three thousand dollars. We all have whatchamacallits and whozits and thingamajigs that we have to buy over and over to keep up with twenty-first century life. Three thousand dollars would go a long way to buying these things, these necessities, and if everyone spent three thousand dollars at the same time, imagine the bump that would give our economy!
Well, if Congressional leadership is lacking then I will not sit idly by, not as long as I am President of this great country. Today I am calling on Congress to provide tax breaks for each and every one of you to the tune of (pause for effect) Three. Thousand. Dollars. That's right, I said three thousand. This will be money that will go directly into the pockets of the American people, just in time for election season so that you can use your thingamajigs to be sure to get out to the polls and vote. Voting is what makes this country great! And I know you are probably thinking that just because you already don't pay taxes you may be left out. But don't worry, you will still get your fair share!
You may hear some people say that spending this kind of money on whatchamacallits and thingamabobbers and boondoggles is bad, that this is antithetical to American values. But you know as well as I do that these people are extremists and fat cats and they don't want what is good for the American people, that these people want to take away your rightfully earned three thousand dollars. Well, we are watching the situation closely. And to these extremists let me be clear; the people will have their money; they will have their three thousand dollars. We do this for the greater good of Americans of all walks of life.
Thank you, good night, and God bless America.
too bad china now makes all our thingamajigs.
Votes inflate too.
Someone tell him it's gonna take $30,000 2 buy my vote. Hell yeah I'll thingamajig dat show like no tomorrow mofo.
How many widgets can I buy for $3,000?
$3000 thats only $9,000,000,000 of printing. the banks got $700,000,000,000 for the first bailout we should get the same thats $233,000 each
- The President of the United States, Barack H. Obama, June 1st, 2012
"It's for the greater-good." - Dr. Paul Special-K
Speaking of crooks:
MF Global Trustee May Bring Corzine Negligence Claims
http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2012-06-04/mf-global-trustee-believes-claims-may-be-made-against-corzine.html
I want to replace the thingamajig in the Oval Office. Can we do that for $3000, because I'd pay that amount to replace it. (And I'll pass around the hat to see if anyone else wants to get rid of him too.)
'$3000 thats only $9,000,000,000 of printing.'
I think you're missing a few 0's there. Try $900 billion. Waitaminute. $3,000?! Quick, someone get banzai7 on an bernanke indecent proposal, stat!
You would be correct if the population was only 3 million.
Isnt 'Thingamajigs' a racist term?
To avoid future math problems use scientific notation:
3 x 10^3 ($bribe/person) * 3.5 * 10^8(US population) ~10^10^11 = 1 T$! (A little less than our current deficit)
Ain't these community organizers great!
(I just want axcess to the $: A real quote from a Rodney King rioter/looter when asked what this riot was all about)
I'm with you. $3000 is not enough. I want $30000, and I want it before everyone else gets theirs so I can go out and buy PM before price takes off.
I've got gadgets and gizmos a-plenty
I've got who's-its and what's-its galore
You want thing-a-mabobs?
I've got twenty
But who cares? No big deal. I want more
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0r9W2Hlxa0
Maybe Banzai can go somewhere with this.
Agreed, $3000 of thingamagigs from this fucktard is a stimulus for the Chinese who specialize in making that kind of shit, 150M recipients is less than 1/2 Trillion, a few hundred points down on the DOW.
Chomp change , or maybe Chimp change which is like, I give you $3000 and you monkeys vote for me and the deficit increases another notch ......................if he gets re-elected, then we really deserve him!
Choom change... or maybe Choom we can believe in.
Agreed. 3000 is not enough. Romney, what do you bid? My vote goes to who ever gives me the most free shit.
Vote for congressman, at least $500. Judges, city council -- $100 each. Pay up, bitchez.
Because right now, businesses are hurting.
.
He doesn't need your vote. Soros will be counting the ballots in Spain . ;o)
from widget to thingamajig = progressive ebonic economic theory.. its the new thing(amajig).
Bushmaster makes some pretty nice thingamajigs.
Yes they do. Lake City also.
Springfield Armory M1A SOCOM I ~$1600, plus either a Trijicon holographic sight or a decent scout scope ~$550, plus 1,000 rounds of 308 Winchester rounds ~$600 = $2750....leaving $250 for a nice Swamp Rat Ratmandu knife and gun cleaning supplies.
Thanks Dear Leader!
No, this will not lead to ...
i n f l a t i o n
"What would I do if someone suddenly dropped three thousand dollars in my lap, right now?" "
Most of Obama's Base Voters would head straight to the local Casino with it, just like they do now at the first of every month, when the Free Gubment Money! comes...
Why? They'll get better odds at the local crackhouse.
O has caved to the 0.1% on everything important except for 1 thingamajig --- bombing Iran. That's why I see O not winning, remember it's not the voting that matters, it's who counts the votes - Iowa Primary this year. BTW Romney is close friend with Netanyahu and will happily bomb Iran and be a good puppet for the 0.0001%.
Well, if the NYT story is correct, O has kept up a newer, more gentler type of warfare with Iran.
pods
a virus begets a virus
Let's See $3000 * 300 Million Americans = $900 Billion. Or was this just for taxpayers (excluding non-working people)?
Just for the "taxpayers" who pay no income taxes.
Don't buy the hype. He's just trying to save the Facebomb IPO. "Thingamajigs" is code for "Facebook shares".
OMG
I fear you may be onto something. Oh the pain. A ponzi sharing plan.
I am waiting for the counter-offer myself.
Perhaps Mr Paul could offer a nice even Eagle.
Bring-it on baby!
This cheap hustler will stop at nothing to get reelected. I'm waiting for his 'October Surprise' student loan forgiveness plan...
These cheap hustlers will stop at nothing to get reelected. I'm waiting for their 'October Surprise' student loan forgiveness plan...
There, fixed it since you forgot CONgress and the rest of the criminals running the show.
He's pretty smart for saying that. It could mean gold/silver coins or firearms.
FREE OBAMA MONEY, FROM HIS STASH!!
Does anybody in the media recall this is what Bush did?? Or is the politically-correct DoubleThink too strong?
Also, does anyone remember that the REPUBLICAN Stimulus Plan was to give every TAXPAYER $5,000 in early 2009, instead of giving trillions to Obama's cronies as political payback?
Ghetto
Hmm I like it.
An (color) Ipad in every home.
I hope those guys are taking notes.
Janice needs to work that in:Oh Lord won't you buy me a new SUV. My friends all got Ipads and I'm stuck with this PC.
"THANK YOU."
Yes, I remember that. But what's really amazing is they gave the current mouthpiece a Noble Prize and his acolytes believed he was The Messiah v2.0.
And now he's a economic genius. The miracles never cease.
Ah since I work 70 hours per week I guess I don't get the motherfucking freebie. At least I can pay for it, though. Fuck this *********** ************ shithole.
you should stop working for dollars and start working for things obama can not print (like gold etc)
Well there is some flowthrough to things like PMs and mining shares...
Oh yeah I remember that one - spent the money towards my vacation in Greece then. True story.
I'll do the same thing this time I did last time- $600 got me a spankin' new 30-30 with a Bushnell elite firefly scope. Didn't figure a lever action needed a scope like that, so I traded it for a pretty decent 870 Wingmaster.
Sure, not as evil-looking as some prefer, but they do the trick in a pinch. $3000 will get me a 1911 and a tactical .410 for the misses, with a little left over for PMs and dried beans.
I hated that shit then, and I REALLY HATE that shit now. Why does this only come up in an election year? Hmmmm, buying votes maybe?
It reminds me of the Town Hall meeting Obama had during his 2008 campaign, i believe...
He completely stutters and is absent minded when teleprompter FAILS...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDJSVPAx8xclol
lol at breathalyzer for asthma patient.
Well, at least Romney would not actively and purposely undermine the country and its Constitution as the Hawaiian Allende is doing. While perhaps not the optimal choice, Romney's still a better choice.
time to lower your current dosage friend...
obama = bush3
oromney = bush4
Not even close. Obama makes George W. look like Albert Einstein and Bill Clinton look like Abe Lincoln.
Hmmm, maybe he is still stuck reading the 1st amendment.
I didn't know that the 2nd amendment was unclear:
(I used the commonly accepted as ratified version of the amendment, which is a bit more ambiguous as it removes some commas. The version ratified by Congress was much clearer.)
pods
I'm not claiming Romney's great; I'm simply claiming that he doesn't have a history of actively undermining the US Constitution and actively attacking the fiscal integrity of the United States government, as the Hawaiian Allende does.
Well if you are claiming he doesn't have a history of actively undermining the US Constitution then you have not read the post you were replying to.
Unless you are now using the conjunction "actively undermining the US constitution AND actively attacking the fiscal integrity of the United States government" as your premise.
To that I would chuckle when you lump US government and fiscal integrity together in the same sentence.
And it case you might think I am supportive of the other side due to my argument, I see no acceptable evidence that he was actually born in Hawaii.
pods
How is undermining the second amendment not undermining the constitution?
If you gonna print and give to banks, might as well give some of that to the people. Helicopter drop to each household= tax break for those who pay taxes and gift to those who don't.
That's how you buy votes. Brilliand
Considering I still owe over $4k to Uncle Sam, I would bet this stimulus would be credited to what I "owe". Then again, I am one of those evil rich people whole will make more money than what is allowed for this helicopter drop.
In any event, I guess Obama has some Bernanke mini-copters - http://www.amazon.com/Wheels-Propper-Chopper-Helicopter-Folding/dp/B003S5RXCC
They'll put it in your pocket with one hand while the other lifts your wallet. How's that $3000 compare to the tax bomb coming 1/1/13? Remember the 'stimulus' in 2008? They put $6-1200 in everyone's pocket with borrowed money and then they Hoovered it back out by running gas up to $4+ a gallon. How long did that money last?
WTF? I missed that one, 6-800 in every pocket except for your disabled vets, we got 250. I do not favor any stimulus aside from a days pay for a days work, but if you are going to drop money on the public it damned well needs to be equal.
Well I didn't see it at all. I'm self employed and was told it was not available except as a tax credit but for whatever reason my accountant said I wouldn't see it...frankly I could give a crap about $600 or $3000, I just want to keep it in my pocket in the first place. Why give it to .Gov and have them blow it and borrow it back from the Chinese and then send it back to me.
Don't you remember Bush's $300-$600 deal? Handing that shit out like making it rain on hookers at scores... where did that money go? It literally did nothing to stall the crash... not even a hiccup or second look... nosedive.
There is a fundamental misunderstanding about what "rational" people do with money when it's just handed to them... we cannot model moral hazard... if we desire certainty and consistency, then moral hazard simply has to be avoided...
But cancelling your debt to the government would not be stimulative. They will actually give you the FRNs and prevent you from paying off the debt with it. Don't think so? They prevented banks from repaying bailout loans early.
Notice how he is hunched over the lectern, head bobbing left and right to the teleprompters. It takes him a little bit to realize he got a laugh, a positive reaction, and see how his attitude changes from another dreary speech he has to give to happy Barack, smiles, he stands up straight, ad libs some to continue the laugh. What this guy truly wants is not respect or support, but to be adored.
First impression when viewing the (thankfully short) video was that it played just like any game show where the host actor suddenly got a lift from the audience during a bunch of dull contestants and played it for laughter - the equivalent of love from an audiance.
As seen on any campaign trail, Obummer just wants to be loved, by anyone and everyone, and laughter seems to be the best substitute - after all, it worked for Carson, and Leno, and (Bob) Hope - some of the best-loved men in the televised media for 40 - 50 years.
And, like the others, Obummer is just an actor - doing the bidding of some directors, whose names we dare not speak.
Does Lord Rothschild come to mind ??? Wonder who all will be on the conference call tomorrow?
Not surprised at all. The last two QEs were eaten by the banks. If given to the people to spend, it'll actually enter the economy, be spent on ithings, and then stuffed into Apple's engorged cash account. Inflation - check. Bought votes - check. Obummer 2012.
Neither a Republican nor Democrat be
Give me $3000 so I can buy some silver and gold thingamajigs.
I'm never going to get my washout gold fills am I? wtf
If they give me $3000 I will use it to file Chapter 7 and leave the country.
LOL nice.
My name on the NYT website was nobamanomour- until they blocked me... Clicked on ob's banner ad for dinner with bo. (ZH can always use a little coin) Noticed his site asks what "state/region/province" you are from. Canada uses provinces. I thought we used states down here. Ain't it illegal to take $$$ from non US sources for fed campaigns?
I want mine in GOLD please.
Hail to the 44th and Bestest White President ever!!!
Tyler-did you mean Keyan-in-chief instead of Keynesian-in-chief? A common oversight.
Obama's new campaign slogan: Lean Forward We're Not Done
http://www.sodahead.com/fun/obamas-new-campaign-slogan----lean-forward/question-2681837/?feed=2446067&new=1&scroll=1
Love that motto: where can I get one for my car?
Obummer 2012: "Lean forward taxpayer, we're not done yet!"
BULLLLLIIIIIIIIIIIISH(it)!!!!!
Dumb guys make me feel all warm and cozy inside. Gee he's a swell guy Wally! Meet me at the malt shop.
A skeptic might say that Obama was trying to buy millions of thingamajigs for $3,000 each, if by "thingamajigs" you meant "votes".
But, I'm in dire need of some whatchamacallits.
No no no. Not whatchamacallits.
You can't buy whatchamacallits with government money. That's crazy.
Thingamajigs. That's it. Buy thingamajigs. It's the patriotic thing to do.
So you're saying the whatchamacallit manufacturers better step up their support for the president's reelection?
I say this is discrimination against the widget manufacturers.
That's dat ole boolshit
They are all in China anyway, so what's the diff.
"If you don't buy Thingamajigs, the terrorists will win. Go shopping bitchez." George W. Obama.
3X thingamajigs & 2whatchamacallits!!!!
it's1778- punch it innnnnnnnnn
Or lever up with Whatchamacall options and Thingamaputs.
And what about Sprockets?! Here at Spacely Sprockets we are also feeling slighted. Are our spockets not good enough? Are our lobbying efforts not lavish enough.
The big O didn't touch your monkey? Oh ah...wrong Sprockets
I prefer Cogswell Cogs.
$3000 to encourage hiring = good idea
$3000 to buy shit from China = dumb idea
But let's consider the source. An American politician.
The Whatchamacallit Manufacturers better step up their support for the president's reelection, or the IRS,DOJ, EPA, and Jesse Jackson is liable to show up at the door.
How the heck is this going to help? Every damn whatchamcallit and thingmajigs I see nowadays are made in China.
Mmmm, Whatchamcallits, the best candy bar ever.
lol
damn...I was sure hoping for some gizmos...
Balderdash ! I make doomahickeys and I am pissed.
Baldrick has a cunning plan.
Blackadder +1485
BTW, for all the Blackadder fans out there, there's been talk for a few years now about the possibility of a new season (or "series" as the Brits say) of Blackadder, re-uniting the entire cast. The most recent talk (circa last October) is significant for the fact that its source was none other than Rowan Atkinson. Plenty of problems come to mind, such as Hugh Laurie's TV success this side of the pond means he commands a really huuuuge consignment of German sausage for his part in it ... or of it ?!
Here's a link to a story in The Mail with plenty of pics. Do try not to get distracted by all the stories running down the right side of the page about starlets in tiny bikinis and the astonishing length of the Duchess of Cambridge's legs and other such fluff ... pip pip, I say, carry on then.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2044028/Rowan-Atkinson-hint...
i am working on it right now.
Funny how his drawl comes and goes.
for a zionist Kenyan raised in Indonesia, the Northeast and Hawaii he sure flips to a southern black preacher accent with some ease.
Gary Oldmam was on NRP over the weekend. I'm not a huge movie buff, but I've always like Oldman and really like the Nolan's Batman movies. For the life of me, I never knew he was British. They were talking about accents and voice coaches and how he actually needed a voice coach to relearn his British accent. I would bet every ounce of silver... he has coaches for this stuff.
Nah, he attended "Reverend" Wright's black church for 20 years straight. He had calculated he wasn't black enough, culturally, and needed more cred in the community, back when he was trying to instigate hope and change via Saul Alinsky model community organizing. The "me black people too" shtick is just that.
He was in Golden Valley, Minnesota. I don't get it. Playing to the MPR snobs' white guilt self hatred?
Mebbe a bit of white guilt but likely a touch of the old fear of the angry black man; the shoutin', pulpit thumpin' righteous badass.
But then again it could just be the teleprompter talking.
Zionist? ONly just before election time the rest of the four years he sold israel up the river.
I noticed the accent, too. I wonder who taught him the word whatchamacallit?
poor Israel
poor, poor, poor Israel
unfortunate, not poor. Worked hard to create a nice house in a bad neighborhood. Lots of racists abroad who dont care.
Now that white people cannot pick on blacks or gays they need israel to be outlet for their tendency to hate
So you must have missed the article about how he carried on Israel's battle plan with the Stuxnet virus?
no i did not miss the article that reported the program began before he became president or the propaganda, now that it is election time, that he was the one directing it, like the navy seals that resuced the american yach hostages, but in fact it was the seals and the nsa doing it by themselves and he reprimanded them for it later.
i also did not miss the articles about how he has treated israel's pm and how he has sided against israel on almost everything until now that the election is nearing and he needs jewish peoples' votes.
Back to the suject of his accent, I kind of detect a bit of racism to white people, a mocking tendancy, in his stereotype of poor white people who talk like that. Or maybe that is just my projection?
Uh, bu - Um - Uh , um uh - uh uh uh
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_cO0IpLClLOQ/TG3R2nv5aJI/AAAAAAAABw0/Gx4twEFTsa...
Sweet. That will buy a shit load of ammo, brown rice and pinto beans and another 3 or 4 drums for the AK's.
THANKS BARACK!
Nearly two more ounces gold!
Not by the time you get it....
I hear you can make a little bit o' money in that there market thingy if you can accurately predict price movement. Maybe, one should get da gold now. And maybe a triple levered etf or some futures contracts.
Maybe.
Or one ounce of gold and changeyoucanbelievin.
wow
we are fooked.
I think, um, I don't know, but I think you can write fucked on this site. Can't you?
Fooked has a nice Scottish ring though.
If you ran an east west line across the British Isles at the latitude where Birmingham is located "fooked" is in infact the correct usage of the word fucked north of this line.
I need a thingamajig from the Asian massage parlour.
Funny I was just thinking more alone the lines of an asian for my thingamajig.
$3,000 will buy how many 'Happy Endings?'
Depends were you are as the index varies
$3,000 will buy how many 'Happy Endings?'
Dunno.....where's Spitzer this morning?
A majig for my thing.
Careful you don't wind up with something like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O09K8EmURhM
is this a thing or a majig??
Band name: Thing A and the Majigs.
I think they opened for the Choom gang, no?
I was actually thinking the Choom Gang would find Majigs to be racist.
I always wanted to start a country band called "Dick Deliverance and the City Slickers".
What is even more scarey is the audience seemed delighted with Barry and his promise of $3,000 and then laughed in unison at the thingamagig comment. How did they manage to assemble a whole auditorium full of muppets I wonder?
They took a survey and asked, "Are you in the market for thingamajigs?"
Those who answered "yes", got dinner with Barack and Michelle.
Dinner is served:
- celery stick appetizer
- low sodium free-range chicken soup
- spinach leaf salad, no dressing
- kung-pao tofu main course
- sugar free fat free flavor free vanilla ice cream dessert
- 15.9 ounce diet coke
If you haven't noticed, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but the country is full of them.
You're correct bshirley it never ceases to surprise me though :)
Look behind OBama and see the demographic his campaign team chose to have televised while he spoke. Voter persuasion is a subtle thing.
"How did they manage to assemble a whole auditorium full of muppets I wonder?"
Maybe a $30 "advancement" was collected on the exit plus optional voter registration forms pack for the real patriots.
With all due respect Tyler, the farce began with that speach in 2004 - not 25 seconds in.