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Obama's Latest Bailout Plan Summarized In 4 Words: "3000 Bucks For Thingamajigs"

Tyler Durden's picture




 

For those who missed Obama's post-NFP sermon on Friday, here is a summary of the Keynesian-in-Chief's latest plan to fix the country: $3000 for everyone to buy "thingamajigs." We wish this was a joke.

The farce gets going 25 seconds in.

 

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Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:46 | 2491459 Mariez
Mariez's picture

This man is a complete and utter joke. His economic policies include thingamajigs, dohickies and whatchamacallits. Brilliant. 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:46 | 2491460 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

This asshole was speaking at Honeywell, largest maker of Thermostats. He referred to them as "thingamajings". What a fucking douchebag. A 50 year old man who doesn't know what a thermostat is??

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:49 | 2491482 Global Hunter
Global Hunter's picture

He doesn't need to know he has servants for that, as long as he has blow, young men, basketball and golf all he needs to know is how to read a teleprompter.  It seems to be the "elite" class is ruling on borrowed time IMO

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:57 | 2491554 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

Barkeep....some blow for me and a beer for my teleprompter.

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:32 | 2491786 uno
uno's picture

that's probably why he ALWAYS needs the teleprompter, no short term memory.  'Yes we can' was chosen for his 3 syllable limitation.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:50 | 2491491 uno
uno's picture

he must of wasted so many brain cells in the choom wagon

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:54 | 2491523 Global Hunter
Global Hunter's picture

actually getting back in the choomwagon would knock some sense into him and help to make him a little more circumspect, its the blow that's fuelling the man now.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:36 | 2491805 BliptoP3
BliptoP3's picture

This asshole was speaking at Honeywell, largest maker of Thermostats. He referred to them as "thingamajings". What a fucking douchebag. A 50 year old man whose teleprompter doesn't know what a thermostat is??

Fixed it.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:52 | 2491909 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

That's a mil spec teleprompter, i.e. works in a wide range of temperatures, ergo doesn't care about temperature, ergo doesn't care to learn about thermostat thingamagiggers.

Wouldn't be awesome if he mentioned say, fixing the economy as a job for thing one and thing two?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 11:05 | 2491971 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

You don't need thermostats in Indonesia.  Or Kenya.  Or Hawaii.  So; no, maybe not.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:46 | 2491462 HungrySeagull
HungrySeagull's picture

HOORAY! Hey SILVER MAN! MARK ME DOWN THREE THOUSAND HANH!?

I'll vote for the scumbum.... (Not that it matters.)

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 11:35 | 2492117 Marginal Call
Marginal Call's picture

I'm waiting for Romney's counter offer.   Reverse IPO the USA Corp this election. 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:46 | 2491463 semperfi
semperfi's picture

Why not $300,000?  Or $3,000,000?  Why not really stimulate the economy and reassure re-election?  And a free iPhone, unlimited data & talk plan, for 4 years - for everyone?  Why not include Greece in on the deal as well?  Hmmmm?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:52 | 2491511 agNau
agNau's picture

Plan B. July Fourth.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:47 | 2491467 Rusticus
Rusticus's picture

Bullish for those gold  thingamajigs !

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:47 | 2491468 Terminus C
Terminus C's picture

... and the crowd ate it up.

Rather than thinking, "omfg this guy has no clue what he is doing!" They thought, "gee he's so funny, I do need a new thingamajig."

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:53 | 2491522 LFMayor
LFMayor's picture

pretty sure those crowds get trucked in man.  And they're akin to those styrofoam greek pillars he used.... fake and plastic.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:17 | 2491706 kridkrid
kridkrid's picture

The crowd ate it up and he was emboldened by it.  It was actually interesting to watch.  It wasn't by design, I don't think... it was a bit of a gaff... but he recovered and turned it to his favor.  The person above who posted a reference from Idiocracy nailed it.  It works because collectively, we are sooooooo dumb.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:47 | 2491469 ArrestBobRubin
ArrestBobRubin's picture

You know who to thank for turning POTUS into something that could look like Dubya or Owebombya. And all of DC like Babylon.

Never forget.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:47 | 2491470 Sandmann
Sandmann's picture

$3000 ? Is that all he is prepared to pay for a vote ?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:53 | 2491521 Sabibaby
Sabibaby's picture

Hopefully Mitt will come out and offer everyone $5000!!!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:15 | 2491678 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

I'm just hoping for future tax exempt status......sorry Grandma.

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:54 | 2491921 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

I will vote for Obama in exchange for diplomatic immunity myself.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:01 | 2491581 junkyardjack
junkyardjack's picture

That's all the citizens are worth, in the USA voters buy you...

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:47 | 2491474 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

Excellent article. I laughed, I cried, I projectile vomited.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:50 | 2491490 achmachat
achmachat's picture

I haven't used the term "projectile vomiting" since my daughter was around 5 months old!

ah.... good times! good times!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 12:57 | 2492422 pods
pods's picture

I concur.  Brings new meaning to the phrase "Keep your mouth shut."

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:49 | 2491479 AssFire
AssFire's picture

With my $3000, I'll take 2 of those St Gauden thingamajigs.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:54 | 2491920 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

I'm upgrading from ikea to the real deal.   Leather.   Already stocked up on popcorn.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:49 | 2491480 agNau
agNau's picture

Send the check. I have some "silva-MA-jigs" I have been putting off buying due to lack of fiat!
Silva-MA-Jigs !!!!!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:50 | 2491897 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

I have about $100K of little golden thingamajigs hidden around my property

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:49 | 2491485 takinthehighway
takinthehighway's picture

Amazing to me that he would mention paying down credit cards with the money, as his handlers certainly wouldn't want people escaping their debt servitude.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:49 | 2491486 djcando
djcando's picture

More hope from the dope!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:29 | 2491767 ArrestBobRubin
ArrestBobRubin's picture

Or was it the coke? :-)

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:50 | 2491488 Mariez
Mariez's picture

The only reason the audience are laughing is that the President just promised them $3000. 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:50 | 2491489 Wishfulthink
Wishfulthink's picture

Did u say Kenyan-in-Chief?

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:59 | 2491571 GOSPLAN HERO
GOSPLAN HERO's picture

"thingamajigs"

Dat be a rayciss term!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:31 | 2491777 ArrestBobRubin
ArrestBobRubin's picture

Hey who ak-sed you? :-)

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:50 | 2491493 DavidC
DavidC's picture

Is it my imagination or is he beginning to sound more and more like G W Bush?

DavidC

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 14:26 | 2492825 TraitorsHang
TraitorsHang's picture

I have *no* idea why you got junked for that post. I thought the same thing when I heard the clip. Bush's $600 bought me 38oz of Ag. Maybe this $3000 will buy me as much.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 17:43 | 2493660 sullymandias
sullymandias's picture

OMG Obama is totally channelling GW Bush in this clip!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:51 | 2491495 kralizec
kralizec's picture

What?  No Doohickies!  That's it, I'm pissed!

/

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 12:28 | 2492309 DosZap
DosZap's picture

Really, he screwed up big time............Wijits are the NEW thing.

Cat do the 300k thingie, that would enable foks to haul ass.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 13:02 | 2492430 robertocarlos
robertocarlos's picture

There would be a new $300k 'leaving the country' tax.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:53 | 2491496 dwdollar
dwdollar's picture

Fine by me.... That'll buy a hundred ounces of silver. Most of the inflation will be in iGadgets I'm sure.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:51 | 2491497 EZYJET PILOT
EZYJET PILOT's picture

Just like his fake birth certificate thingymajic

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:51 | 2491501 valley chick
valley chick's picture

will need alot of thingys...ISM NY Index is......uh oh....

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:51 | 2491502 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

Jeezus.  Make it fucking stop.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:12 | 2491667 johnQpublic
johnQpublic's picture

yes, dear lord who art in heaven, do this day, please, just make it stop.

in the name of the father, son and the holy ghost

make it stop

amen.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:51 | 2491503 sudzee
sudzee's picture

Trillion dollar promise. Where is that money coming from???????????????

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:01 | 2491568 Rynak
Rynak's picture

From those to whom he then gives it back?

:-)

Actually, strike that.... it is even more ridiculous: "Hey, how about i'll make everything 10% more expensive, ergo you'll all earn 10% less.... and for this, i will give you 3000$?"

Zombiecrowd "Yay!!!! Thank you, you're so generous!"

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:02 | 2491594 aleph0
aleph0's picture

 

 

"Where is that money coming from?"

Why the new VAT of course ! 
... after he gets re-elected !

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 11:02 | 2491955 SokPOTUS
SokPOTUS's picture

From his stash.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:52 | 2491504 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

 

 

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:52 | 2491505 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Can we all pool our money and buy a new POTUS instead?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:09 | 2491642 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Ron Paul for the win!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:22 | 2491737 Kayman
Kayman's picture

Sorry, you must be a member of the Club to buy a President.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:52 | 2491506 jpc578
jpc578's picture

And we wonder why the economy sucks.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:10 | 2491657 krispkritter
krispkritter's picture

Yeah, we're beyond wondering why Obama sucks. (that was just some crazy college stunt, really!)

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:52 | 2491507 frenchie
frenchie's picture

0.o

W T F ???

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:52 | 2491508 AL_SWEARENGEN
AL_SWEARENGEN's picture

Disgraceful,  Constitutional scholar my arse,, 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:52 | 2491510 Cursive
Cursive's picture

American patriotism circa 2001/2012:  Shop till ya drop!  He just surpassed Dubya for dumbass pandering.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:55 | 2491536 Raymond K Hessel
Raymond K Hessel's picture

Not yet, but he still has until November to get there.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:56 | 2491543 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

I never thought there would be a president I would hate listening to more than GW. I was wrong. I won't make that mistake again. Fool me once, shame on... me. Fool me twice... shame on... won't get fooled again.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:03 | 2491583 AssFire
AssFire's picture

Fool me twice?... Well- then you have some really BIG TITS!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:04 | 2491607 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

I actually hated listening to Clinton more.  Something about that perpetual shit-eating grin.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:12 | 2491673 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

Agreed.  When these types of people start talking, I always check to make sure my wallet is still in my pocket.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 14:05 | 2492629 Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

He just needed more slack.

 

-BD

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:53 | 2491518 lynnybee
lynnybee's picture

yup.   $3,000 sure could help my stacking & stocking efforts .    thank you, Mr. President !   

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 13:11 | 2492460 ZeroPoint
ZeroPoint's picture

My thoughts exactly. But I think this time around it will be spent ammo & more #10 cans with a 30 year shelf life.

 

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:54 | 2491524 Salt
Salt's picture

He said the magic word, thingamajig. I was expecting a duck to drop down.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:05 | 2491617 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

That was funny.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:54 | 2491526 Coldfire
Coldfire's picture

On some great and glorious day, the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

H.L. Mencken's prediction has come true. Again.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:19 | 2491717 Meatballs
Meatballs's picture

And it will be a repeat either way.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:54 | 2491529 Ted Baker
Ted Baker's picture

MORGAN STANLEY IMPLIED VOL NOW GREATER THAN FB ABOVE 70%...TIME IS TICKING FOR MORGAN

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:55 | 2491531 CreativeDestructor
CreativeDestructor's picture

'r fucked

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:55 | 2491533 debtor of last ...
debtor of last resort's picture

Great leadership we have on this planet. Weird stuff. Good for bullion.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:00 | 2491535 Arnold Ziffel
Arnold Ziffel's picture

I can buy two more high quality (and very useful) didgeridoos.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:56 | 2491541 JmanSilver.Gold
JmanSilver.Gold's picture

HOLY SHIT !  Are you FUCKIN kidding me ?  Well, its barry the bankster puppet, nevermind I even asked.

THINGAMAJIGS FOR FURNACES !  YEAH that will fix everything !   LOL wow

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:56 | 2491544 Global Hunter
Global Hunter's picture

I'd prefer $3,000 worth of frivolous chotskis

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:56 | 2491547 Conman
Conman's picture

Hmm what about the widgets and whatchamacallits?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:56 | 2491550 GOSPLAN HERO
GOSPLAN HERO's picture

"thingamajigs"

Dat be a rayciss term!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:01 | 2491584 Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's picture

OK I have to say it:

He wants us all "nigga rich".

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:27 | 2491756 DeadFinks
Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:58 | 2491560 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

The next bail out package will be"refund" checks to the pleebs to buy votes

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:58 | 2491562 junkyardjack
junkyardjack's picture

NASDAQ testing 200 day MA...

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:58 | 2491563 Ace Ventura
Ace Ventura's picture

Wow. Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States. Don't he make us proud?

Can we get a RESET here, please? 1776 Version 2.0, anyone?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:58 | 2491564 Conman
Conman's picture

in other news, "stocks are well off the highs" - all wouldnt we love to hear cnbc say this over and over

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:58 | 2491569 Kina
Kina's picture

Is that 3,000 for everybody in the world, or just Americans.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:58 | 2491570 midgetrannyporn
midgetrannyporn's picture

A Honeywell thermostat is $60, not $3000 (not yet anyway).

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 09:59 | 2491573 IrritableBowels
Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:00 | 2491576 pepperspray
pepperspray's picture

Hey- What do you call a thingamajig for the ChoomWagon?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:00 | 2491578 UTICA CLUB XX PURE
UTICA CLUB XX PURE's picture

So he's proposing a printing of enough money to pay every American $ 3,000.00? 

That's 311,591,917 people X $3,000 = $ 934,775,751,000 "Lets Get That Done!!! Fukin Joke. Looks like a comedy show. Are Americans really this stupid??? God!!!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:00 | 2491579 Alex Kintner
Alex Kintner's picture

WTH, at this point why not. They already gave away Trillions to the bankers. Fuk it, pull all the plugs out and let the ship go down in one massive party. I'm beyond caring now.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:00 | 2491580 gold-is-not-dead
gold-is-not-dead's picture

Thank God, thingamajigs!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 11:28 | 2491582 fuu
fuu's picture

Gold crossed $1620 right after he said that.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:01 | 2491585 ziggy59
ziggy59's picture

It's actually five words

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:02 | 2491590 lynnybee
lynnybee's picture

i just watched that clip again .    i want to puke .    asshole!   banker plant !   ex-C.I.A. guy with familial ties going back decades, not even born in this country !    wake up, people / sheeple !! 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:10 | 2491653 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

Lynny!!  You are getting so jaded!  I remember your first post...  So wide- eyed and wondering...  Frustrated with your neighbors and family...  No one would listen...

So I wonder:  Are they listening yet?  And have they wondered whatever happened to that sweet li'l old lady they walked and talked over every day?

It's always great to see you here.

 

Tomato.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:02 | 2491592 mess nonster
mess nonster's picture

Did you say "KENYAN in charge?"

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:03 | 2491596 JuicedGamma
JuicedGamma's picture

FUBAR

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:03 | 2491598 REALTRADE
REALTRADE's picture

You can buy all the thingamjigs and whatchamacallits you want, as long as you don't buy any doohickeys. Thats sir, is not allowed.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:03 | 2491599 Kina
Kina's picture

I think that was $3,000 for each American banker, to buy thingamajigs for the bunga bunga parties.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:07 | 2491636 the grateful un...
the grateful unemployed's picture

$3000 for the bankers to lend out to consumers who already have too much debt in order to buy thingamajigs.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:03 | 2491601 chebetts
chebetts's picture

What's up with his Texan draw?? Is it me or is he sounding more and more like Bush??

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:06 | 2491626 HungrySeagull
HungrySeagull's picture

GAH!!! **CHOKE.. VOMITS all over the boards...

Cue Blazing Saddles damn it!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:09 | 2491645 LFMayor
LFMayor's picture

LOL,  I thought of the little old lady in the street.  "UP YOURS, N...!"

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:05 | 2491619 baja canada
baja canada's picture

Are the unions on board with this?  Thingamajigs are manufactured in Mexico with Chinese parts.

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:06 | 2491624 Roland99
Roland99's picture

I've got whozits and whatzits galore.  I could use a few thingamajigs

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:12 | 2491668 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

...looks a lot like a fork...

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:42 | 2491850 Roland99
Roland99's picture

was hoping it would more like a spork.  Much more useful.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:09 | 2491625 GOSPLAN HERO
GOSPLAN HERO's picture

What does one get when one crosses an alcoholic Kenyan buck with a dumb white girl from Kanasas?

Answer: a thingamajig

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:15 | 2491693 gwar5
gwar5's picture

What is black and white, with red eyes, and has two middle fingers that always point up?

 

A Choom-U president.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:09 | 2491647 gwar5
gwar5's picture

Somebody rang my Thinamajig??  Here's some Thingamajig mockery from the Twitterverse, courtesy of Twitchy.   Make up your own....

 

Mocking of Obama's 'thingamajig' continues with sidesplitting - Twitchy 

 

 

          "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this thingamajig."

 

          "Dammit Jim! I'm a doctor, not a thingamajig!"

"Look! Up in the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! It's a Thingamajig!"

"A thingamajig in every pot!"

"Hey guys, can't I just finish my thingamajig?" 

"Read my lips. -- No. New. Thingamajigs."

"Luke. *I* am your thingamajig." 

"Ask not what your thingamajig can do for you, ask what you can do for your thingamajig."

 "The purpose of education is to replace an empty mind with a thingamajig" - Malcolm Forbes 

"Give me liberty or give me athingamajig."

  

"I only regret that I have but one thingamajig to lose for my Country" 

Keep your friends close and your thingamajigs closer. 

   Thingamajig and Change!
"I am become death, the destroyer of thingamajigs." 

 

 

Oh, our aching thingamajigs!

***

Update:

Twitter’s mockage made The New York Times!

 

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:13 | 2491675 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

Dude:  that thingamajig really pulled the room together...

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:09 | 2491648 PaperBear
PaperBear's picture

More debasement of currency.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:09 | 2491650 Alcoholic Nativ...
Alcoholic Native American's picture

I could use 3000 bucks, good idea. 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:10 | 2491654 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

I missed it. Whos $3000 are we going to get? His? Is he giving someone else my $3000? Is he just printing it up so it's only half my money? Unless he's telling me i can keep my own damn money, he can get stuffed!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:21 | 2491686 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

...izz cummin' frum hizz STASH!!  OBAMA MONEY!!!

Das wyy we VOTE for hymm!

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Ojd13kZlCA

 

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:10 | 2491655 UTICA CLUB XX PURE
UTICA CLUB XX PURE's picture

"Lets get that done right now"

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:10 | 2491658 Canadian Dirtlump
Canadian Dirtlump's picture

This cult of personality gets more disgusting by the day. Like a bad stand up comic playing to his most ardent fans.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:10 | 2491659 Bluz
Bluz's picture

Great, I can buy more silver.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:11 | 2491661 pacu44
pacu44's picture

12on Paul

 

Wife and I will buy gold/silver :)

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:11 | 2491664 Meatballs
Meatballs's picture

Meanwhile, the other side of the coin doing themselves proud...

http://www.policymic.com/mobile/article/id/9163#comment-share-link

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:12 | 2491665 John Law Lives
John Law Lives's picture

"We wish this was a joke."  -  ZH

Well, it is a joke. The fact that this person is the TOTUS is an even sicker joke.  Choosing Obumble for TOTUS over Dr. Ron Paul would be akin to passing over a bottle of Dom Perignon for a bottle of Night Train.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:12 | 2491670 UTICA CLUB XX PURE
UTICA CLUB XX PURE's picture

Watch it again and just look at the zombies...

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:13 | 2491680 Hedgetard55
Hedgetard55's picture

$300,000 would be that much better, no?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:14 | 2491683 shovelhead
shovelhead's picture

Drunk walks into a bar and yells "Drinks are on me."

Bartender says, "Your credits no good. Piss off."

Drunk yells "Drinks are on him."

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:18 | 2491709 Boxed Merlot
Boxed Merlot's picture

Who cares if there's no fuel in the tank, squirt some more ether in that carb, it's bound to start!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:24 | 2491742 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

Excellent allegory

 

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:30 | 2491773 John Law Lives
John Law Lives's picture

Clever.  Mike in East Texas used that analogy on the 'Overnight With Charley Jones' show early this morning.  Mike in East Texas is the man.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 13:45 | 2492640 Boxed Merlot
Boxed Merlot's picture

I had no intention of being clever.  I would've attributed it to him had I heard it.  The analogy is actually very easy to see and is nothing more than stating the obvious.  We all know how it will end.

 

More ether backed cyphers and longer period of servitude.

Tue, 06/05/2012 - 10:32 | 2495818 John Law Lives
John Law Lives's picture

"I had no intention of being clever."

I was complimenting you re. the astuteness of your observation.

Unless you live in Texas, I doubt you would have ever heard of Mike in East Texas.  He is a regional personality who participates weekly on a local radio program.  On Monday morning, he made the same observation you did, and he used the same analogy.  

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:18 | 2491710 XRAYD
XRAYD's picture

A thngmajig for my furnace!  Yah, just what I need for the long cold SUMMER.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:18 | 2491713 savagegoose
savagegoose's picture

$3000 wil get you a gold thingamyjig,

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:19 | 2491720 realitybiter
realitybiter's picture

1)  I have some serious dislike of his predecessor

2) That said,  If his predecessor had said this it would be on SNL for a month straight.  Comedic careers would have been launched.  Bill Maher, ugly mug and all, would have been smugly mocking the "Idiot in Chief" 24/7.

3) The only people less capable than this fellow are those that voted for him and the journalist who are silent.

 

It is a disgusting, pathetic state of affairs.  WTFU you retards.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:22 | 2491738 johnjkiii
johnjkiii's picture

Shoot man, I got 3 Thingamajigs, 2 whatchamacalits & a cockamamie for only $500 Bucks. I'm going out now 'cause I saw whatzits on sale for only $300 & a 2012 Hoozamawaht, 4 cylinder with a CD player for $2000. With the $200 left over I'm gonna short the dollar.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:40 | 2491829 denny69
denny69's picture

Hey, my neighbor, Whozeewatsiss, went to that same store and he forgot to tell me the name. So, what's the name and where is it? Does Obummer shop there?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:24 | 2491745 swmnguy
swmnguy's picture

I've had this little joke for 3 years now, watching as the losses of the finance industry roll right onto the public balance sheet.  According to some sources, the US has spent over $12 Trillion in one way or another, propping up the Ponzi.  I've been saying we'd all be better off if they'd taken that money and sent a check for $40,000 to every man, woman and child in America; to do whatever they want with it.  I've said they're just fooling around and trying to cover themselves up to now, and we'll know they're serious when they take such a drastic step.

Of course, I knew that would never happen because, while most people would use that to spend down their debt and solidify their financial situation (and you'd think that would be considered a good thing), that would eliminate the consumer debt in the economy, and without consumer debt, there isn't any actual money in the economy any more.  So they'll never do it; or at least not until $40,000 is enough to buy 1 can of ersatz coffee and 2 loaves of bread.

Does the President know something we don't?

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 11:59 | 2492203 Marginal Call
Marginal Call's picture

If everybody paid down their debt by 40K and those that didn't have 40K in debt spent or invested their 40K all the banks would be solvent and lending like crazy again to start a new cycle;  or if you were now debt free you're no longer paying interest on your debt and can just paygo for everything you buy.  The money would end up in the same place as the first bailout (the banks), but with much of our debts wiped clean.  Instead of the original bailout adding to our public debt, and going straight to the bankers which just gave us the shaft.

 

That would be 100x more effective than the banker bailout, but it would still fail because it wouldn't address the cause of the crisis.  

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:27 | 2491757 realitybiter
realitybiter's picture

"It's the thingamajig, Stupid"

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:28 | 2491758 GubbermintWorker
GubbermintWorker's picture

Fucking wow! So, were done with bread and circuses and down to crumbs and circuses?

 

If I get $3000 its going to guns, gold, or ammo.

 

Oh, maybe silver too!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:28 | 2491764 HD
HD's picture

Hey, I'm not proud - my vote is up for sale...good enough for congressman, good enough for me. Maybe Mittens will cut me a check for $4000....

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:30 | 2491772 theTribster
theTribster's picture

[sarc=on]

My vote is worth way more than $3,000 and I don't need any thingamajigs right now. Besides, Mittens promised me $3500 and he said he likes me best so there Obama. I'll need at least $4000 to consider voting for you, let's face you have the money so just send some my way and vote for you I will...

[sarc=off]

How insane is this? The video is too short to get any context out of those statements, guess I'll have to work a little and find the full video to I can hear what other goodies he be promising us. You have to give him credit though, telling people he will give them money is always a pretty good vote getter, now Mittens will have no choice but to see Obama's position and raise him at least $500 - maybe by November we'll be getting a full years salary (at minimum wage) based on who we vote for. Now that's democracy and capitalism at their finest, don't ya think? Our political system has become a joke that has zero integrity, none whatsoever.

I can't listen to him but for a few minutes, same with Mittens - the shit actually starts to stink right through the television (or radio) and makes me gag - they are two very stinky men. Obama is a lier and Mittens is an idiot - great choice! Maybe we get lucky and the whole financial system melts down sooner than later and we get to put Ron Paul into the nomination because at that point the sheeple will finally figure out Ron is right and has been right all along...

It could happen if everything falls into place in terms of timing, we need the crash to start and be at its peak by early August before the republican convention. Then at the convention - MILLIONS of people show up (republicans and democrats) demanding that Ron Paul be made the candidate and Mittens goes back to destroying companies and stealing their value. Obama shits himself because they have NO defense against Ron.

Obama might have to consider using the NDAA and the drones to eliminate Ron as a candidate otherwise he'll get his ass handed to him come election day. Even the majority of Blacks and Hispanics would vote for Ron, shit we would probably have Europeans and Asians coming over to push for Ron. The world knows we have to change things, and they know (more then our population) that Ron Paul is the only viable answer right now...

So, hope for the crash to come sooner than later, we need a peak just before the republican convention if we are to have any chance at all. Remember, Ron is still a candidate he did not relinquish that status (nor did the nitwit Sanitation)...

I'm not giving up, while its a long shot it is possible that it could work, especially if things really go tits up (which is likely).

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:55 | 2491916 Element
Element's picture

America! ...  Fuck  Y E A H !!!

 

I'd buy some new strings for that puppet ... sorry ... muppet ... these ones are much too easy to see.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:30 | 2491774 JmanSilver.Gold
JmanSilver.Gold's picture

thingamajigs will fix everything, Lord Barry has spoken.  SO let it be,,uhhmmm  ,,uhh,,,,ummm,,,oh yeah,,WRITTEN,,,,and ummm,,,uhh,,,OH YEAH,,,DONE !

Obviously valerie didnt send the teleprompter to MN .

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:31 | 2491775 luckylongshot
luckylongshot's picture

With every trillion dollars added to the deficit costing around $25 million per day in interest alone ( at 1%)..even a promised $3000 does not fill me with confidence that Obama has things under control...however if he was to promise to end the fed and return the power to issue money to the people (as per Thomas Jefferson)then that would be a game changer. Borrowing from the Rothshilds to give Americans money to spend is only benefitting the Rothshilds..not the American people.

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:35 | 2491780 4 wheel drift
4 wheel drift's picture

let's give the irs some chinga-majigs every aprul 15......

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 10:32 | 2491785 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Impeach him!

Mon, 06/04/2012 - 11:11 | 2491999 therearetoomany...
therearetoomanyidiots's picture

Plenty of reasons to...I'm with you...

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