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Ok, You Better Be Sitting Down For This One...

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Seriously...

  • STRAUSS-KAHN FILES COUNTERCLAIM IN LAWSUIT BY HOTEL MAID - BBG
  • FORMER IMF CHIEF SEEKS DAMAGES FROM HER FOR ALLEGED FALSE CLAIM - BBG

Time for the Onion to admit reality has bested it and graciously close down.

 

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Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:24 | 2426499 CPL
CPL's picture

How DARE YOU  let me stick my dick in your ass

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:24 | 2426503 CPL
CPL's picture

Here's a summons.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:27 | 2426522 Gamblor
Gamblor's picture

Clearly not that simple.  Still, have to credit his opponents, who recognized his Clintonian-sized appetite for sex and baited the fish hook, line and sinker.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:38 | 2426578 GetZeeGold
GetZeeGold's picture

 

 

Not only is he not going to tip her.....he's demanding a refund.

 

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:47 | 2426634 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

So? Dominique Straus-Kahn is not allowed to stand up for himself and challenge this insulent fraudulent woman? Dominique Straus-Kahn is the former HEAD OF THE IMF MORONS! He doesn'thave to put up with insulent nonsense like this from anybody. ESPECIALLY not from a pathetic unaccomplished members of the "general public".

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:08 | 2426745 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Ben Bernanke is a moron. 

 

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:28 | 2426881 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

I agree with him entirely. If you can't stick your dick up her arse, sue the bitch.

She probably deserved it...

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:29 | 2426884 WALLST8MY8BALL
WALLST8MY8BALL's picture

ManBernKrug!

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:21 | 2426831 ThirdWorldDude
ThirdWorldDude's picture

Dominique Straus-Kahn is the former head of the IMF morons...

 

You got that one right!

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:48 | 2426970 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

semi colon; after "head" or (of the IMF morons) would have been a nice touch...

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:35 | 2427217 DaddyO
DaddyO's picture

 

 

That was my thinking as well, jaded maybe.

DaddyO

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:28 | 2426877 KandiRaverHipster
KandiRaverHipster's picture

can you point me to any conspiracies or theories on why he was setup and deposed?  when the story initially broke, i was of the opinion Sarkozy was afraid DSK would run against and beat him for the French presidency.  but anything on, say, DSK wanting gold to play a more important part in monetary policy or advoating a move awayfrom a Dollar-centric system would be appreciated.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:23 | 2427140 Iwanttoknow
Iwanttoknow's picture

One was that DSK was trying to replace dollar with something like SDR.I cannot vouch for the veracity.Also google paul craig roberts on DSK.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:39 | 2427241 KandiRaverHipster
KandiRaverHipster's picture

thanks!  this is EXACTLY what i was looking for.  http://onlyinamericablogging.blogspot.com/2011/05/paul-craig-roberts-on-...

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:28 | 2426526 Hard1
Hard1's picture

You've been served

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 13:34 | 2427829 JeffB
JeffB's picture

deleted

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:28 | 2426533 battle axe
battle axe's picture

This asshole and his arrogant wife should be hit with baseball bats. What scumbags..

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:31 | 2426551 stewie
stewie's picture

Maybe a scumbag, but that's beside the point.  He was framed by TPTB.  Go get'em tiger.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:36 | 2426565 tocointhephrase
tocointhephrase's picture

He stuck his dick in the wrong place, its called the IMF

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:39 | 2426575 ThirdWorldDude
ThirdWorldDude's picture

He'll get'em for sure, now that the (s)election in France is over.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:02 | 2426716 Abitdodgie
Abitdodgie's picture

DSK had found out there was no gold in Foft Knoks when he left the hotel he left his phone because he was been tracked, they thought he was still at the hotel, then he made a phone call from the aircraft ,thats when they got him and the docs to prove there was no gold. the maid just started working at the hotel that day.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:37 | 2426564 Eireann go Brach
Eireann go Brach's picture

Welcome to the new America where Obama says you do not have to take responsibility for anything any more, so now even filthy French fucks can sue the maids they molested!

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 12:17 | 2427515 sgt_doom
sgt_doom's picture

Well, if anyone's been actually following this case, including the excellent reportage by investigative NY journalist, Epstein, she's got a seriously questionable criminal past, and is a highly suspect plaintiff!

I'd say DSK has a well-built case (and tons of money for the lawsuit).

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:27 | 2426519 kaiten
kaiten's picture

GM should sue government for bailout.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:27 | 2426523 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Since the date of the alleged incident they have both mutually agreed to fuck each other. At least that is plain as day.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:29 | 2426527 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

No, no let us not jump to conclusions.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:29 | 2426528 Downtoolong
Downtoolong's picture

She doesn't have any money. He's probably hoping for a settlement of 50 BJ's.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:30 | 2426545 eigenvalue
eigenvalue's picture

50 BJ's? But she is HIV positive...

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:40 | 2426598 toady
toady's picture

So is he...

A match maid in heaven?

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:48 | 2426632 Gavrikon
Gavrikon's picture

I'd just as soon stick my dick into a wood chipper than into that african petri dish.  Anyone exercising judgement that poor should be, well, the President of France.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:30 | 2426530 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

These people are jus nukkin futs. Why do people feel the need to watch reality tv when it doesn't get any goofier than real life?

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:30 | 2426532 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

The little perp goes to jail, the big perp always walks - same as it ever was.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:29 | 2426538 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

DSK LinkeDin PROFILE

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:41 | 2426600 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

You are one sick mother f**ker Banzai7.

And I love it. :>)

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:58 | 2426688 cossack55
cossack55's picture

Got anything in there about The Onion assuming control of the NYT Op-Ed page?

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:29 | 2426539 junkyardjack
junkyardjack's picture

I assume in the countersuit he claims, when a woman dresses like that she is asking for it...

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:45 | 2426624 toady
toady's picture

You need to say it in a deep voice & with more authority :

ANY woman that DRESSES in a MAID UNIFORM is ASKING FOR IT!

And you better hope for an all-male jury...

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:31 | 2426547 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

Let us wait for the "document dump" first...

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:32 | 2426549 zilverreiger
zilverreiger's picture

what if he was set up?

how many cocks does that woman have to suck now to repay him?

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:35 | 2426558 Dien Bien Poo
Dien Bien Poo's picture

just one. Ben Bernanke.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:42 | 2426601 fuu
fuu's picture

The judges would have also accepted:

 

  • Jamie Dimon
  • Jon Corzine
  • Timmah
  • Mike Bloomberg
Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:39 | 2426577 Appleseed
Appleseed's picture

Maybe this will help prevent more false accusations.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:40 | 2426584 giovanni_f
giovanni_f's picture

Come on. DSK's sexual predilection was known long before. Only when he became a threat to the system, he had to be corzined. His mistake was to have clear ideas about a post-dollar-centric financial world order. The world is not a secure place for high ranked position holders with heretic ideas.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:51 | 2426645 toady
toady's picture

What does he think he will get? Set the record straight? Her first born son? Indentured sex slave?

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:50 | 2426647 SDS Trader
SDS Trader's picture

"Time for the Onion to admit reality has bested it and graciously close down." - LOL - so true...

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:51 | 2426648 Morphine Drip
Morphine Drip's picture

Why is my inbox filled with spam for IMF  anal lube. ** At discount prices**

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:52 | 2426660 Gavrikon
Gavrikon's picture


The New York City hotel maid who accused former International Monetary Fund chief Dominique-Strauss Kahn of sexual assault has allegedly worked as a prostitute, the New York Post reports.

A source close to the defense investigation told the Post that the Sofitel Hotel housekeeper would have sex with male guests at the hotel for money.

"There is information... of her getting extraordinary tips," the source told the Post.

The source also said that the maid had "a lot of her expenses -- hair braiding, salon expenses -- paid for by men not related to her."

 



Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2011/07/02/hotel-maid-accusing-strauss-kahn-rape-reportedly-worked-as-prostitute/#ixzz1uwjAVwly

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:59 | 2426693 Lets_Eat_Ben
Lets_Eat_Ben's picture

How like the elites, take every last dime that pion has!

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 09:58 | 2426700 web bot
web bot's picture

To call this man a cockroach... discredits the environmental benefits that cockroaches provide.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 17:33 | 2429067 Sokhmate
Sokhmate's picture

cockroaches are actually an engineering marvel of mother nature.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:06 | 2426727 Beaver_Valley
Beaver_Valley's picture

If only she had swallowed the evidence....

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:18 | 2426812 Canadian Dirtlump
Canadian Dirtlump's picture

Eh, good for him. That low end savage has pretty much been proven to be a criminal. DSK is no doubt a womanizing pervert, but it appears here he got railroaded after getting some free stanky on his hangdown.

 

Now about those charges Christine "leather couch face" LaGarde was up on that went into thin air..

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:19 | 2426819 WTF2
WTF2's picture

DSK is obviously ill.   Normally the claim for damages by a defendant would be after a trial produces no evidence of any wrongdoing by said defendant. 

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:20 | 2426822 Motorhead
Motorhead's picture

Le gauche caviar Francois Hollande is loving every bit of this as he begins rearranging Sarko's office.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 10:56 | 2427012 theTribster
theTribster's picture

The guy was totally framed, twice no less! I do not believe that he tried to rape a maid, that is ridiculous given the money the guys has and the circles he ran in. Obviously, he was ready to run for the President of France against Hollande so they took him out. The reality is he could be very dangerous that's why they pegged him - twice.

He may be a total scumbag but I don't believe he tried to rape maids at hotels, sounds ridiculous. In fact, knowing that he ran the IMF pretty much guarentees he was a scumbag, maybe Hollande will make him Prime Minister -:) That would certainly be a curve ball...

Nevermind, Hollande picked some other dude to be Prime Minister. Not a very well known guy apparently, like Hollande. Let's see if they can change Europe and force the Germans to relent on their austerity demands, I think they will make progress with Merkel because she knows she has to relent, at least a little. Angela's party got fried in the elections so she has to make some adjustments, she's smart enough to know that.

Tomorrow he picks the Parliament, so again we get a chance for Kahn to get involved in French politics after all. I expect he and Obummer will get along well given they are both socialists.

Lebanon is crumbling into complete civil war. By the end of this year the Middle East may be engulfed in war, its completely out of control and we are sponsoring it (along with others). Western cultures are fucking up the entire world, in every sense, from the environment to the financial and political systems. How long before the system break down and cease to function? (not long I suspect, mid to late summer).

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:50 | 2427310 BlackVoid
BlackVoid's picture

"How long before the system break down and cease to function? (not long I suspect, mid to late summer)."

I agree with your post, except for this one. The sheep is still asleep, it will not collapse just yet.

Maybe DSK tried to defect to the light side.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 14:04 | 2428167 Archduke
Archduke's picture

uhm.  he was running against Sarkozy at the time.  not hollande.

 

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:05 | 2427051 Dan The Man
Dan The Man's picture

I think DSK knows something.    She was probably coerced by the CIA and DSK wants to see them do a dog and pony show for a while. He wants his pound of flesh. BAHAHA. 

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:17 | 2427096 falak pema
falak pema's picture

ha, ha, ha , ha... "Nafissa, you seduced my dikk for the wrong reasons and now you must pay. Just look what it cost me! It could be me who is taking the plane to Berlin and not that unknown shill called Hollande. All he knows is to say 'cheese' in front of the TV cameras! Whereas I, I know how to sing 'Cum shake rattle n roll baby', to Angela! No way she could have refused, no waaaaay! I would have got two birds with one hip turn : Angela and Greece." 

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:32 | 2427190 derryb
derryb's picture

it was an orchestrated political takedown that was a success. He would probably be the French president today had it not accomplished its mission.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 11:33 | 2427195 Hannibal
Hannibal's picture

STRAUSS-KAHN wanted to bring back the gold standard but got "setup" by the Powers-That-Be instead.

Wed, 05/16/2012 - 01:18 | 2430453 e-recep
e-recep's picture

any evidence that supports this claim?

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 12:50 | 2427747 Manny
Manny's picture

He was falsely accused of a ghastly crime. And now he is suing the maid who made those false accusations. I do not find a fault with that.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 14:21 | 2428236 Clovis Man
Clovis Man's picture

The fun part will be to see who his lawyers call in for depositions and hearing what they have to say. That may be what he's really after rather than the maid's paycheck.  After all, he has plenty of free time right now, and what could be more fun than trying to depose the CIA?

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 15:13 | 2428442 kurt
kurt's picture

Looks to me like he is still trying to fuck her.

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 19:19 | 2429474 TheProphet
TheProphet's picture

This is unbelievable

Tue, 05/15/2012 - 19:18 | 2429479 TheProphet
TheProphet's picture

While you're feeling glib about this situation, remember: this guy is very rich and powerful, and in possession of a bully pulpit. And If they can fuck him over like this, then you know they can do it to anybody they wish.

If this is a railroading (as many here think), you should be very afraid.

Back to specifics. Kahn's message here is very clear: he is not going to pay her off. This should get interesting.

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