Osama's Grand Plan To Destroy America: President Biden

Tyler Durden's picture

In celebration of the one-year anniversary of the Corzining of Osama, a stash of letters uncovered during the raid that killed the Al Qaeda mastermind uncover a truly terrifying 'grand plan'. As the NY Daily News reports, Bin Laden planned to target more airplanes at Petraeus and President Obama with the cunning plan that a successful assassination would propel an "utterly unprepared" Vice President Biden into the Oval Office - and send the US spiraling into chaos." In the aftermath of Solyndra and the realization that Biden's key economic advisor was Jon Corzine this actually sounds like a brilliant plan. The full list of 17 Bin Laden letters can be found here with English translations and the Combating Terrorism Center's report is embedded below. Luckily for all of us, it appears the weakened Al Qaeda had no means to pull off such high profile attacks and Osama even reflected on his frustration with the inability of spinoff terror groups to inflict real damage on the West. Oorah!


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GOSPLAN HERO's picture

Joe Biden went full retard before it was fashionable.

Gully Foyle's picture

I think SAW has the better franchise.

The Osama brand seems to have petered out and just doesn't conjure the same excitement.

NotApplicable's picture

Say it ain't so, Joe!
Say it ain't so!

Buckaroo Banzai's picture

<-- Osama died years ago, this is a bunch of made-up psy-op bullshit

<-- I actually believe this bullshit.

JustObserving's picture

Obama is Nobel Peace Prize winner.  Would he lie to you?

Would he start a war? ... never mind.

Have the audacity to hope that he is telling the truth.

narnia's picture

Maybe Obama is an unknowing participant in the psy op.  

UP Forester's picture

Doesn't anybody get it?  OBL was the greatest arch-nemesis the US could ever create!

Whoever did this one up surely got promoted, I mean, a fortune-telling terrorist a la Nostradamus?

Who else could have known that 7 years after his death a semi-black man would be grinding the organ, and his monkey-assistant really was a fur-challenged mutant Rhesus monkey?

Fukushima Sam's picture

This story brings to mind an image of a bunch of CIA agents sitting around a conference table, making up all the "evidence" they "found" in the Osama compound and laughing their assess off over this gem.

Comay Mierda's picture

some of said agents probably worked with OBL when he was on the CIA payroll

BBC: Osama bin Laden was CIA agent & Al-Qaeda Never Existed - Invented by CIA


Vampyroteuthis infernalis's picture

Putting unprepared Biden into office? Since when was Obamao ever prepared. OBL (I mean CIA), you disappoint me.

Henry Chinaski's picture

Ha! I knew it.  Biden as VP has done more to protect Obama than anything the Secret Service can do.

Harlequin001's picture

'Bin Ladin’s frustration with regional jihadi groups and his seeming inability to exercise control over their actions and public statements is the most compelling story to be told on the basis of the 17 declassified documents.'- in other words, Osama was not in charge of any Al Qaeda at all, but was made out to be the 'leader' of something far more sinister for other more dare I say it, 'patriotic' purposes.

Funny that... Not.

Clashfan's picture

Great link, Comay. Thanks.

Benjamin Glutton's picture

I believe different B/S.


1. Zawahiri gave targeting info on OBL loyalists in Pakistan

2. Zawahiri sent OBL wife to him to expose OBL

3. The common interests were Mubarrak(Zawahiri),Kaddafi(al Libi),al Qaeda off Saudi back Syria split from Iran.

4. Zawahiri has assisted in Libya and Syria.

5. Zawahiri continues to betray factions he does not control(Yemen)OBL told his loyalists to scatter too late.

6. we get to keep our boogeyman and an intelligent jihadi we can deal with(Zawahiri).



al Libi escapes from Bagram...WTF????



It is a given that .gov is dishonest but it is also largely incompetent so it's easy to assume OBL escaped. It strains credulity to credit our CIA with suddenly brilliant insight based on old torture intel. Lastly real time targeting info of active AQ in Pakistan and elsewhere was just too plentiful to come from anywhere but inside AQ(Zawahiri/al Libi). JMHO.

socalbeach's picture

kind of encouraging so far - less than 10% (3/34) of ZH readers are dunces.

A Nanny Moose's picture

Frightened citizens are more....um....pliable.

Randall Cabot's picture

I assume that Osama took some time off from channel surfing through the porn movies to come up with this plan.

sgt_doom's picture

So this is the guy who was supposed to be affiliated with the 9/11 op?

Why does this sound weird?  He suddenly became retarded?

You might believe one or the other, both believing both is truly nutty?

Buckaroo Banzai's picture

It's a test to see just how stupid and demoralized the US population is. The feedback they've been getting so far is: really, really stupid and demoralized.

goldfish1's picture

The New York Daily News? C'mon.

tarsubil's picture

Let me see here. What was his career path? Frat boy, ambulance chaser, slum lord, politician. Sounds about right. The American Dream.

Ubama al Biden 2012 - Forward March

The Big Ching-aso's picture



Osama Bin Buried.   Yippee kai yay.

AnonymousAnarchist's picture

The OBL post-9/11 interviews (where he consistently denied having anything to do with the attacks) make for much more interesting reading (probably because they don't read like B-movie government propaganda).

Also more intersting. Of course, if you follow ICYMI, all of this is so old as to be boring.

narnia's picture

This is clearly a shadow government psy op.  My gut tells me this is setting the stage for seizing Balochistan when they march into Iran.  

smb12321's picture

But I thought "for a fact" we were going to invade Iran two months (or was it weeks) ago?  If you're making predictions, at least try to keep them in synch with others on the board.  I believe the operative time is now October for the invasion.  And won't holding onto Iranian territory be popular with the military folks? LOL

narnia's picture

Only a supreme dumbass would look at this and not question intentions: http://www.aljazeera.com/indepth/interactive/2012/04/2012417131242767298...

Richard Chesler's picture

Hard to believe that taking out the corrupt bankster-puppet-in-chief would bring even more chaos.


Silveramada's picture

Can u believe it? the killed Osama B.laden twice and they still busy boogieman us with him???LOL

Problem Is's picture

+1... Correct analysis...

jez's picture

They keep killing him, but he won't STAY dead.


Dang furriners. Cain't trust 'em an inch.

rufusbird's picture

Just wait! In about 2 years they can kill him again and no one will remember he is already dead!

FOC 1183's picture

Into chaos? Yes.  But think of the entertainment value Biden would have provided

Stoploss's picture

Sure took a long time to "translate" that shit.


Whatever. Fodder for the believers.

Midas's picture

This is a big fuckin' deal!


---Joe Biden.

krispkritter's picture

Biden on Corzine: This is a big fuckin' steal!

On Osama: This ain't fuckin' real!

On Fast and Furios: Holder's rigged the deal!

On Pelosi: What an idiotic clapping seal!

Biden is WH comic relief...


smb12321's picture

I swear that sometimes Biden makes Bush look halfway intelligent!  I'm still not sure if he really means what he says or if it's all an act to attempt to appear stupid.

Betty Swallsack's picture

No body and no pics, but wait....we, we, we got letters! Lots of letters.  It only took a year to translate them, but look!  They all say that you should still be very afraid and allow TSA to go down your pants and send you to the microwave scanners to have your DNA broken down.

How much more mileage will they get from waving around the dead guy, some eleven years after he died from renal failure?






Jena's picture

Betty Swallsack:  We got letters! Lots of letters.


Kind of like that Vanity Fair article about Obama's girlfriend.

Buckaroo Banzai's picture

Word in the Chicago bathhouses is that Barry likes to suck the cocks of older white gentlemen.

Betty Swallsack's picture

Ewwww.  Just what are YOU doing in those bath houses to have heard those words?  Ewwww.

Papasmurf's picture

Plus he admitted to being in Chicago.

Jena's picture

I cannot look at Rahm Emmanuel on television without thinking of the things I've read here.  I hear he has Presidential ambitions.  That can't be true, can it?

DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Good observation.  REALLY scary question too!

Clashfan's picture

Um, Buckaroo, I think you got that backwards? The stuff I read (apparently from or linked to Madsen--everything I could find seems to originate from that one source) said that he liked to be fellated by the older, white men. Correct me w/a link, please, if I'm wrong.

DaveyJones's picture

that was my first thought. Kind of the reverse (but same truth) of the Homeland Security Act that was thousands of pages but immediately ready after 911