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Rumor Of A Rumor Confirmed: Rehn Regurgitates Desperate Bank Recap "Plan"

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Rumor time, just as expected:

  • EU'S REHN SAYS THERE ARE PLANS TO RECAPITALIZE EUROPEAN BANKS - BBG

When the FT fails, drag the viceroy of New Feudal EuropeTM into it. EURUSD shoots from the hip without any regard for logic or math. And here is the math: the combined European banks' (yes, all those banks that virtually all passed the stress test as in they DONT NEED NEW CAPITAL) market cap, in addition to being lower than that of Apple, is about half of what the banks needs to raise to meet Goldman's liquidity needs. In other words, banks will dilute themselves by at least 200% to become viable. And they plan on pulling this off without a mutiny by existing shareholders how again? Oh yes, the word is "nationalization." And that will surely confirm that Europe is stronger than expected. This broken market is now trading only rumor to rumor, each of which is getting more and more desperate and more ridiculous.

 

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Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:23 | 1702834 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

Broken record bitchez

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:32 | 1702880 101 years and c...
101 years and counting's picture

as long as the retards keep buying the same rumor, keep rolling it out there.  really is quite hilarious and provides excellent shorting opportunities.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:53 | 1703285 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

Don't ever listen whatever Brussels says,
Even though an EU nationalization of TBTF is definitely a scenario.

I don't understand this "New Feudal EuropeTM" thing Tyler is fond of, is anywhere a link to a ZH article that explains it?

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:23 | 1702837 Dog Daze
Dog Daze's picture

DIE bitchezzz

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:26 | 1702849 LookingWithAmazement
LookingWithAmazement's picture

This system will never die. People get squeezed.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:54 | 1702958 fuu
fuu's picture

Keep licking that boot toady.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:15 | 1703068 Lord Welligton
Lord Welligton's picture

Do you have anything other to offer than stupidity.

Like an analysis of your position?

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:23 | 1702838 LookingWithAmazement
LookingWithAmazement's picture

No Armageddon. Bye bye crisis.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:28 | 1702859 magpie
magpie's picture

Why that's just ramptastic.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:49 | 1702949 The4thStooge
The4thStooge's picture

There's this thing called mathematics. You can only pretend that it doesn't exist for so long before the reality of it overwhelms the fantasy. It is mathematically impossible for Greece to repay its debts, and mathematically impossible for banks to stay solvent when that debt is leveraged 30:1 on banks' balance sheets. If you think that 1929 can't repeat itself then you have no concept of the cyclical nature of history. Remember, you're the one saying "it's different this time, no crash." Those people are always wrong.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:52 | 1702961 spiral_eyes
spiral_eyes's picture

People forget the crash of 1926. That is the real analogue to 2008. 1929 will be closer to 2011.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:54 | 1702969 Translational Lift
Translational Lift's picture

Rumor has it that a Greek farmer was digging for coal in his back yard and uncovered a huge amount of coal.....it magically turned to gold over night and in his generosity paid off all the debt owed by the PIIGS.  See.....no problem after all!!

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:00 | 1703005 Mec-sick-o
Mec-sick-o's picture

Your sarcastic comment is an analogy to printing fiat and pay debt.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:16 | 1703066 Spirit Of Truth
Spirit Of Truth's picture

As an economist, let me assure you that you can use mathematics to believe whatever you want to believe.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:16 | 1703071 Lord Welligton
Lord Welligton's picture

Do you have anything other to offer than stupidity.

Like an analysis of your position?

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 20:45 | 1704103 Corn1945
Corn1945's picture

I don't get it. You're down almost 2000 Dow points and still gloating!

I bet you'll still be talking out of your ass when we have a four digit Dow.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:24 | 1702840 Outlaw Of The W...
Outlaw Of The Wasteland's picture

Almost makes me wistful for chollie gasbagarino's daily 3:30 tape bombs.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:24 | 1702841 RSloane
RSloane's picture

It will continue to get more desperate as it speeds up its freefall. There is no unity in the European Union.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:30 | 1702871 tom a taxpayer
tom a taxpayer's picture

Sarkozy breaks partnership with Merkel and points to new partner: shocking photo of EU leadership break-up.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/eu/8784530/Europes-prob...

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:34 | 1702890 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture
'Europe’s problem is that no one knows who’s in charge'

That's the beauty of a democrazy.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:58 | 1702989 english serf
english serf's picture

Perhaps he was just pointing there to explain to merkel what he is

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:26 | 1702845 JPM Hater001
JPM Hater001's picture

Look mummy there's an old plane up in the sky...cue guitar.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:30 | 1702872 moonman
moonman's picture

Good Bye European Union...Good Bye

 

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:37 | 1702898 caerus
caerus's picture

mother should i trust the government?

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:40 | 1702910 I Got Worms
I Got Worms's picture

Mother, do you think they'll try to break my balls?

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:26 | 1702851 scratch_and_sniff
scratch_and_sniff's picture

Dont know if there are many people rushing to consider what you are saying TD, not to sure many people will care at this time...

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:55 | 1702971 fuu
fuu's picture

Aww one of the system's little toadys is trying to gloat.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:26 | 1702852 Triple A
Triple A's picture

fuck all the rumors. at least i got my outoor harvest about ready.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:27 | 1702854 DalaiLamaInAShark
DalaiLamaInAShark's picture

NFE!  I love it.  And it has a Viceroy no less....

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:27 | 1702856 Motorhead
Motorhead's picture

"...getting more and more desperate and more ridiculous."  Must be some mistake.  I thought I was reading about the US Federal Reserve.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:28 | 1702862 RSloane
RSloane's picture

There is a common theme....

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:31 | 1702858 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

'This broken market is now trading only rumor to rumor, each of which is getting more and more desperate and more ridiculous.'

Again, as in the States this will probably calm things down. This will sink in only later when the whole process needs to be done again. Outrage will be calmed and people will slowly go back to sleep. This is all really too predictable, surely nobody actually thought that the SQ gives in without deranged nonsense 'solutions'.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:29 | 1702865 monopoly
monopoly's picture

So we ignore every rumor and do nothing different. How stupid do these people think we are?

Oh, and lastly, Denninger mouthing off how stupid we all are and look at the blow-off tops and how it is all over. Somebody pass the barf bag.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 20:06 | 1704024 oldman
oldman's picture

mono.

"How stupid do these people think we are?"

it seems that the answer to the above might be:

"not as stupid as we think we are", because when these comments are read 'they' seem to be 'us'     om

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:30 | 1702868 JLee2027
JLee2027's picture

Payments/Bond rollovers due today from Greece?  I thought several billion Euro's today were to be rolled. Did that happen?

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:30 | 1702869 Seasmoke
Seasmoke's picture

soon it will be every country, bank, man, woman and child for themselves.....no one working together here

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:30 | 1702870 fyrebird
fyrebird's picture

Unicorns now shit rumors?

Does anyone here remember the good ol days when they shat skittles? Ah, the memories ...

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:31 | 1702874 magpie
magpie's picture

No in fact they now shit HOPE.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:45 | 1702940 Smiddywesson
Smiddywesson's picture

Unicorn deflation.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:31 | 1702875 freethinker4now
freethinker4now's picture

BIG COCKS

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:31 | 1702876 youngandhealthy
youngandhealthy's picture

Nationalized for a short while...like US did 2008....

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:32 | 1702878 PicassoInActions
PicassoInActions's picture

Rumors are cool, it means we are in range bound and it's not a bad opportunity for forex. Up,down,up,down.

Any ideas where Euro will gove when trichet is going to speak tonight?

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:33 | 1702879 RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture

As usual, banks and retail outperforming everything today.

Gold profits being booked to buy beaten down names

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:36 | 1702894 Stack Trace
Stack Trace's picture

Do you try hard to have idiotic ideas or do they come naturally to you?

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:40 | 1702913 taraxias
taraxias's picture

No, trust me he tries hard. Then he sits back and masterbates on how many red arrows he'll collect.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:37 | 1702901 tickhound
tickhound's picture

as "usual"

Hey Vizzini, you keep using that word.  I do not think it means what you think it means.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:33 | 1702886 LookingWithAmazement
LookingWithAmazement's picture

Armageddon underway - sell PMs, run for cash. Adagium of today.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:34 | 1702888 RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture

Possible "False Breakout" in long bond futures, big reversal today

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:37 | 1702899 Blorf
Blorf's picture

Everyone with two neurons to rub together will sell to the Fed.  30 year bond at 2.75%?  No thanks.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:35 | 1702892 RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture

NEM already roundtripped back to its opening print.

Ratio Traders about to get hosed???

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:36 | 1702893 Madcow
Madcow's picture

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The Feds realize that the Ponzi is collapsing – and they know they are powerless to stop it. So, they will simply sit back and wait for the total destruction of the asset markets.  When the dust settles, and assets are trading at pre-1980 levels and the citizens of the West are bankrupt and homeless – they will point to a new, international super-Fed as the savior who can “re-start the economy” (probably not the IMF or any other organization that has proved to be overrun by sex criminals).  The super-Fed will begin a new – bigger – better Ponzi.  But the new Ponzi will be used to capitalize and fund the growth of Asia and Africa – not the “West.” The “West” has served its purpose.  There is no longer any wealth to extract – so it will be left to rot.  Anyone who doesn’t look forward to 30 years of deflation, depression, bankruptcy, civil unrest, and cannibalism should leave the USA or Western Europe immediately if not sooner.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:43 | 1702924 caerus
caerus's picture

would you say it was "udder chaos?"

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:43 | 1702929 sabra1
sabra1's picture

that's why i told my parents i demand to be born in canada! canadian tire money has never lost value!

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:38 | 1702905 youngman
youngman's picture

and gold and silver is down big...lol....what a world we live in...a bankrupt bank is worth more than gold and silver in an investors mind...we are wacked

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:40 | 1702911 oogs66
oogs66's picture

what is rehn's job if they dissolve the eurozone?

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:42 | 1702917 magpie
magpie's picture

Janitor of the €uro Museum.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:44 | 1702931 Gubbmint Cheese
Gubbmint Cheese's picture

Selling Batteries at Radio Shack.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:45 | 1702935 Dick Darlington
Dick Darlington's picture

He will become a prison bitch in some nasty country. He's not welcome in Finland anymore.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:00 | 1703008 Clorox Cowboy
Clorox Cowboy's picture

Are you implying an alterior motive?  Surely Rehn is only interested in the best interests of the people! /sarc

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:42 | 1702918 Byte Me
Byte Me's picture

Next up -- double leveraged Rumour ETFs...

F knows what they'll track -- Pols speech index??

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:43 | 1702923 youngandhealthy
youngandhealthy's picture

The whole idea IS to "crash" gold....dont you get it?

it's fiat v.s. gold....

second USD v.s. ROW

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:43 | 1702926 youngman
youngman's picture

sponsered by FT..they have all the good rumors

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:43 | 1702928 Ruffcut
Ruffcut's picture

It's not about buying rumors of rumors. More like buying rumors riddled with lyin, cheatin and stealin. Chucky Ponzi never realized how intense the game could be played.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:51 | 1702952 agrotera
agrotera's picture

Tyler, you need to get into the script making and sell TV or movie rights for a storyline "Gossip Boys" and it would be a MUCH bigger hit competing with "The Apprentice" audience much larger than the "Gossip Girl" audience....real life is always more interesting than fiction. 

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:51 | 1702953 marcusfenix
marcusfenix's picture

surreal...I wonder if this is how the people on the titanic felt just before they realized that A. the "unsinkable" ship was indeed, sinking and B. there were not enough life boats to go around and C. the terrible realization that their money could not buy them a seat on a lifeboat no matter who they threw how much at because , well, the ship was sinking and an exit was worth more that all the fiat paper in the world.

It looks like we are going to have a green close today so somebody is still paying attention to the band...but the ship may now be listing enough now so that the rumors of a fix will start falling on deaf ears...

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:51 | 1702956 Peter K
Peter K's picture

22:00 CET, and the eurocrats are still trying to get the words right :)

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:52 | 1702957 FoieGras
FoieGras's picture

How is the market broken? This is a typical bear market. Nothing new or broken here at all. Business as usual.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:52 | 1702959 rambler6421
rambler6421's picture

I feel like shitz bitchez.......gold and silver down big time. 

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 15:56 | 1702977 daily bread
daily bread's picture

Just go long on "RMR".

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 17:16 | 1703438 max2205
max2205's picture

Learn to hedge high RSI plays or quit posting

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:01 | 1703011 Sequitur
Sequitur's picture

Observations:

DZZ is a fucking horrible bear etf. Gold down huge, it should have moved a lot more today. Never purchasing it again.

GLD puts -- holding them through the weekend, I think we see 140 GLD next week. GLD is fucking garbage, it is going to crater. Worthless paper with zero yield, who are the idiots that buy this crap.

Still holding some of my physical maple leafs. Best sell I've made this year was some monster silver boxes last weekend at 40.75 or so per ounce. Those boxes are heavy, snapped the Mint strap on one of them.

Utilities and Exxon -- held my utilities. Will continue to hold them. I love them, they barely budged through this latest selloff, and I get paid every month for owning them, people will always need water and energy. Picking up some Exxon Mobil shares, just nibbling.

Municipal bonds: I continue to hold them and may pick up some more, but have and will continue to avoid CA, NJ and IL.

Shorts: sold my NFLX, GLD, and GS puts for wayyy too cheap last week. Guess I shouldn't complain about making small profits in this market, but could have had monster gains had I waited out the Fed.

Deflation: it's the name of the game. Shit is still going lower, including stocks, commodities, and yes precious metals. Will buy a house for cash in the 2013-2015 time frame, because housing is going to continue to get crushed.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:03 | 1703017 Dick Darlington
Dick Darlington's picture

09-23 15:17: Ireland's Deputy PM says do not need more bank aid from ECB or EU

So they have 150 bn from ECB, 50+bn from their OWN central bank (ELA-program), 80 bn from the bailout bandwagon ie european taxpayers, then there's NAMA which sucked something like 80 bn bad shit from the banks. Did i forget something? That's in Ireland, folks. A tiny little small economy. They don't need more? I've heard this many times from Ireland but we'll see. How's those full recourse mortgages people have, people who bough on the top and saw their houses lose 60% in no time? No problems coming from those?

 

BNP Parbas (BNP FP) US CEO says BNP has not been looking to raise external capital - CNBC Fri, 21:20 23-09-2011

 

Oh, they too don't need capital? Salgado said earlier today that spanish banks DON'T need more capital either.

 

So what the **** is this mouthpiece of the EU-dictatorship talking abt? Noone needs capital. The banks say it, the "stress test" say it so what's the big noise?

They're ALL liars. And on top of that they're in panic. And when they're in panic they will make bad mistakes. That's how EU works. Lies, denial, panic, mistake. And i sincerelly hope the next mistake will be the last.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:03 | 1703022 aerial view
aerial view's picture

Don't worry, they have everything under control just like they did 3 years ago when Hank "the skank" Paulson decided it was necessary to bail out the TBTF banks. The curtain has been pulled 3/4 open on these "wizards of economic destruction" and still most of the public doesn't see or want to see what is happening. At some point either voluntarily or involuntarily everyone will stop paying their mortgages, credit cards, car loans, taxes, etc and force the banks and govt into submission; until then we will remain debt slaves to the biggest swindlers and ponzi schemers of all time.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:09 | 1703036 Duffminster
Duffminster's picture

Jim Sinclair, the most respected and accurate long term gold analyst in the world just issued this headline:

 

Market Violence Will Create Large Bear Trap

"Dear Extended Family,

A quote from CIGA Eric today completely encapsulates what we are experiencing in the gold market:

This is a repeat of 2009 – actually even more extreme readings than 2009. We are severely oversold today. Anyone not buying here does not believe in the fundamental story. In my opinion, this will be a huge entry point by 2012.

In conversations with Kenny we examined the worst case scenario in terms of the correctness of Eric’s comment with which we both totally agree.

Our conclusion is:

Market situations like this will be found to have held and created bear traps in several instances of similar pattern action over the past 30 years WITHOUT having continued further down to first major support. The current corrective pattern over the past 23 trading days strongly implies that the move below $1690 would continue on down to the core at $1665 at minimum as first bottom, and in the extreme to $1615, but not below $1584. This will happen prior to exhaustion and a return to the full bull trend.

So far the remaining successive levels of $2450/$2510; $2850/$2900, and $3280/$3330 are not affected.

Gold shares are being impacted by a field of problems as a result of the large short positions held in almost all. They are being taken advantage of today by pressuring the entities in hopes of causing long term holders to collapse in their commitments.

Respectfully,
Jim"

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:10 | 1703045 NEOSERF
NEOSERF's picture

PLANS TO RECAPITALIZE ain't quite the same as agreement which is the next step and that is where this ALWAYS TRIPS UP...there is no unity and the "plans" always involve spending German and French money to plug holes...

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:13 | 1703053 Peter K
Peter K's picture

French money:? You mean British money.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:26 | 1703120 richard in norway
richard in norway's picture

fake money, its all fake money

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:20 | 1703084 Peter K
Peter K's picture

They've obviously found a new way to make money :)

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 16:32 | 1703153 navy62802
navy62802's picture

Despite the recent crash ... GOLD Bitchez!!! (and silver)

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 17:06 | 1703377 supermaxedout
supermaxedout's picture

The problem is that  it is never enough money to save the "Greek System".

I tell you why: The Greek state itself is completely disfunctional with the exemption of the military.  Unfortunately the Greek military is a big dark hole in itself. Please have in mind that the military of this tiny nation is involved alongside the US in Afghanistan and Kosovo and other costly missions away from home.  The defense budget of Greece is in proportion to the Greek economy about twice the size of UK. Greek has Eurofighters, Submarines all the goodies produced by the "defense industry". In other words an important market for France, UK, US and Germany.

So what do we have. We have a functioning military spending big bucks buying all kind of military goods.

And we have the rest of Greece state which is simply not functioning.

The State is not able to collect taxes in a substantial way. Because the taxpayers simple bribe the tax collectors. In other words you have a state with a huge budget but with only marginal income. By the way, 25% of the total workforce in Greece is employed at the goverment (compare this to 9% in Germany while nobody can claim that these 9% are not enough to manage the public sector Germany) . 

Payment for the Greek government employees is usually not that high but on the other side there is not much to do (due to the high number of government employees). This gives time for side occupations which are very popular.  Not to mention that bribes paid by the "productive part of the population" is increasing the income significantly.

The problem is not the economy in Greece.  If it would be an economic problem one could find a solution. Maybe it would be painful procedure and would take a decade but there would be hope that things can improve.

But this is not the case in Greece. The problem is the system. Its simple not possible to improve it because the corruption is so deep rooted. The only solution is to destroy the system totally and then introduce radical changes.

So the question is not if Europe wants to help Greece. This is out of question. But the problem is, that when a patient (the Greek economy) is terminal ill the best doctors and all the good will can not help. Greece has a spreaded economic cancer called corruption. The Greek system is dying because it is running out of liveblood to say fresh money supply from external sources

The consequences of a Greek default may have grave consequences but I simply see no possibility to avoid it. Because in Greece enough is never enough. All the money is just simply disappearing in a black hole while the "productive part of the population" in Greece gets poorer and poorer.

So Greece has to collapse otherwise Europe is going kaputt.

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 19:32 | 1703945 zorba THE GREEK
zorba THE GREEK's picture

There is too much opposition to central banks monetizing debt now, so we will have to 

wait for crisis stage to be reached and for fear to overcome the populace. At that point, 

outcries for central banks to act will drown out the critics and the inevitable printing and

debasement of currencies can continue unabated until inflation progresses to hyper-inflation.

This is the only way out of our debt problem that is acceptable to politicians today. All other

avenues are viewed as political suicide. 

Fri, 09/23/2011 - 21:52 | 1704220 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

Thats all they got anymore.  They are throwing these out like somebody throwing pots and pans at some monster trying to get them in order to get to some form of safety.  Where are they going to get the money to bail out the hundreds of billions if not 2 Trillion or more that the EU have in debt swapped to each other.  They can't go to Germany because they are in the same boat and they need whatever money they have to somewhat save their economy.  France is lying so much about Societie Generale that already other countries are pulling investments out of that bank.

Sat, 09/24/2011 - 00:31 | 1704470 DrunkenMonkey
DrunkenMonkey's picture

I do love the comments on Europe that come out of the US.

But what of American leadership ? Between a lame-duck Teleprompter-in-chief, a crazed central banker and a majority house leader that bursts into tears at the drop of a hat ..

Sat, 09/24/2011 - 01:20 | 1704525 RoadKill
RoadKill's picture

I don't understand why author thinks this plan is bad.

We all seem to agree that Euro banks are under capitalized.

90% of you seem to feel this is a big enough deal to cause the system to crash. (Not saying you are wrong - I'm just modest enough to admit I don't know for sure).

Euro banks have shown they won't voluntarily issue equity.

So what is wrong with governments forcing a recap? I mean other then the fact that you are short and are rooting for millions of people to suffer just so you can make a $?

Seems to me the best resolution to this is for Greece to default, but remain in the Euro. No one will lend to them, which forces them into SEVERE austerity - thus reducing PIIS desire to also default. And France, Germany et all... force their banks to recap at market rates despite dilution to current owners. And instead of giving tax payer $ to Greece, save them for a Euro TARP should it be needed.

Not sure what the fault in this plan is other then S@@t doesn't hit the fan and some people's fall out shelters, guns and ammo, stock piled gold and bags of beans and rice - turn out not to be good investments.

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