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So Much For A "Record Black Friday": November Retail Sales Miss Big

Tyler Durden's picture


Earlier we just got confirmation out of Best Buy that one can not, as expected, offset negative margins with near-infinite volume (as the stock tumbles). Now we get advance retail sales proving that all speculation about a record Black Friday was just that. Oh, and a lie. In short - everything missed. Advance retails sales in November (including Thanksgiving) came at 0.2%, on expectations of 0.6%, and down from a revised 0.6%. Retail sales less autos was 0.2%, half of the expected 0.4%, while ex Auto and Gas also printed at 0.2%, also missing big. So... where did all the money go, aside from generating even more negative profits for retailers, who now have to eat a huge cash hole in addition to everything? Or were speculations that Black Friday was a bust, spot on? Expect lower Q4 GDP revisions based on this data.

From the report:

The U.S. Census Bureau announced today that advance estimates of U.S. retail and food services sales for November, adjusted for seasonal variation and holiday and trading-day differences, but not for price changes, were $399.3 billion, an increase of 0.2 percent (±0.5%)* from the previous month and 6.7 percent (±0.7%) above November 2010. Total sales for the September through November 2011 period were up 7.4 percent (±0.5%) from the same period a year ago. The September to October 2011 percent change was revised from +1.1 percent (±0.3) to +1.3 percent (±0.3%).


Retail trade sales were up 0.3 percent (±0.5%)* from October 2011, and 6.8 percent (±0.7%) above last year. Nonstore retailers sales were up 13.9 percent (±2.3%) from November 2010 and gasoline stations sales were up 12.9 percent (±1.7%) from last year.


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Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:39 | 1973378 fonzanoon
fonzanoon's picture

So far futures have barely moved on this news. Dupont revised their outlook UP from their previous revision DOWN 2 days ago.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:45 | 1973405 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

Congratulations to ZH for calling out the Black Friday hype well before this confirmation. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:49 | 1973420 CORNGUY
CORNGUY's picture

Numbers don't matter.


Only Speculation.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:03 | 1973479 curbyourrisk
curbyourrisk's picture

Numbers don't matter.

Speculation is just a feeling.



Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:49 | 1973692 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Numbers do matter! See, it takes the power of "negative margins with near-infinite volume" to create the magical confidence we know as TBTF.

Remember, we have to do something

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:56 | 1973447 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Dupont re-crystaled their balls from 'outlook negative' 2 days ago to 'outlook positive'? 

Based upon what, ramp in explosives sales?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:08 | 1973499 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Executive bonuses will now be larger.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:37 | 1973633 walküre
walküre's picture

They "misspoke"

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:39 | 1973379 My Taint
My Taint's picture

SNAP cards don't work at Best Buy? Fuck me.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:57 | 1973450 jeff montanye
Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:38 | 1973641 Potemkin Villag...
Potemkin Village Idiot's picture

BEST BUY to roll out it's new grocery department in 5...4...3...2...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:40 | 1973381 AngryGerman
AngryGerman's picture

since when are fundamentals important again??

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:40 | 1973382 Saxxon
Saxxon's picture

That was the joke about WMVN in early 2000;

"We're losing money on every sale".

"That's OK, we'll make it up in volume".

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:50 | 1973426 midgetrannyporn
midgetrannyporn's picture

$2 waffle makers told the tale.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:17 | 1973539 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

So that pepper sprayin cunt didn't need to blast everyone for her mind control machine....I mean Xbox.  I'll give her Xbox.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:24 | 1974316 Almost Solvent
Almost Solvent's picture

Make it up on volume.


Reminds me of the Michael Scott Paper Company.

Serving Scranton's Paper Needs In 2009.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:40 | 1973384 Irish66
Irish66's picture

Fomc to peg unemployment to what?  Little help!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:19 | 1973546 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Due to the excessive rain in the Ohio River Valley and unexpected snow storm in the Northeast, unemployment rose as interviewees couldn't get to the interviews out there.  Here's Tom with the weather.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:40 | 1973654 Potemkin Villag...
Potemkin Village Idiot's picture

Weatherman Tom here:

Today's forecast: "In the ROCKY Mountains... Cloudy... In the CLOUDY Mountains... Rocky"

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:40 | 1973386 MassDecep
MassDecep's picture

"Expect lower Q4 GDP revisions based on this data"

Expect lies and distortions from the Czars.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:53 | 1973435 junkyardjack
junkyardjack's picture

Spending was down because people were worried about the floods in Thailand

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:59 | 1973463 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:41 | 1973387 the 300000000th...
the 300000000th percent's picture

But, but, but were in a recovery?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 13:55 | 1974745 TruthHunter
TruthHunter's picture

That's correct sir... were in a recovery

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:42 | 1973392 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

I swear I got a larger chocolate ration in November... I really do!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:18 | 1973542 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Not only was your ration increased, but the hedonic adjustment found that 10g of chocolate in its current form is the equivalent of 11g of last year's.

Lucky you!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:44 | 1973671 Flakmeister
Flakmeister's picture

That Hershey's vs. Godiva thingie.... got ya...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:15 | 1974257 ElvisDog
ElvisDog's picture

Along similar lines, I was in the store yesterday and wanted to buy juice. The first carton looked small. I read 59 ounces on the label. I thought "fucking bastards" and looked for a 64 oz container, because I hate it when they reduce the package size. I found out that there are no 64 oz juice containers any more. They're all 59 oz.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:24 | 1973578 Freewheelin Franklin
Freewheelin Franklin's picture

No Red Cross package for you next month.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:42 | 1973395 TradingJoe
TradingJoe's picture

Obviously in the market's view .2% seem to be hardly a "big miss", I truly wonder WHAT WILL!?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:19 | 1973548 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Missed coupon payment.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:47 | 1973396 Janice
Janice's picture

I hate Best Buy. They don't return your emails and hang up on you. The customer service at Best Buy is as poor as McDonalds. The Best Buy employees just wring their hands and explain why they can't help you. However, a friend who works at a local gun shop said that sales were booming. No pun intended. He said that he's never seen the place so busy.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:57 | 1973452 junkyardjack
junkyardjack's picture

I went to best buy a few years back and spent $300-400 bucks on a wii, an extra controller and a bunch of games.  I didn't watch the cashier as she put all of my stuff in bags, stupid me I thought you could trust them, and I get home and I realize that 2 of the games that I purchased aren't in the bag.  I go back to the store and tell them that 2 of the games were not put in the bag and they look at me like I'm trying to rip them off.  I say why would I spend nearly $400 buying a video game system and then come in to try to get $50 back for some games, it makes no sense.  They looked around the cash machine where I purchased my stuff, didn't see the games as of course the cashier already moved them somewhere else and that was that.  I never went back to Best Buy again, I will laugh when they eventually go out of business, pieces of shit.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:15 | 1973527 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Problem is they can only afford to hire retards now. I remember back in the day, Best Buy would actually have some sales people who knew what the hell they were talking about. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 14:01 | 1974774 TruthHunter
TruthHunter's picture

They're in the technology business.  If they cared they would note the time on your slip,

have security check the video, give you refund, and fire the clerk.  What's so hard about that?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:15 | 1973526 the black arrow
the black arrow's picture

A n employee at cabelas told me that if it wasnt for the gun desk, they would likely close that store

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:28 | 1974343 MachoMan
MachoMan's picture

Which is strange because the margins on guns are nil...  but rare, collectible, and class 3 stuff is a different ballgame...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:44 | 1973672 pods
pods's picture

I abhor Best Buy.  Obnoxious lighting, shitty music, poor organization.  Giant ADD clusterfuck!

Crikey, the only way you could get me to want to be there was if it sold drinks and had girls in cages.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 22:41 | 1977086 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Meh, never did like go-go boots; now, transparent, fsck-me platform high-heels -- MEOWWRR!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:43 | 1973398 Cdad
Cdad's picture

This is good news.  Maybe American zombie shoppers figured it out, and pocketed cash instead of useless, Chinese made, redundant tech bobbles.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:03 | 1973480 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Lets hope that is the case! The worthless bankers, who only know how to make a living by fractional reserve lending of fiat credit they counterfeit themselves, would flip out if 'the consumer' turns penny pincher.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:44 | 1973403 warezdog
warezdog's picture

I had a feeling that all the "record black friday" reports were bogus and even if they were real I was betting most of that money was spent using credit cards.  Seriously, are we EVER going to get ANY real stats from ANYONE?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:46 | 1973411 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

hahahahah, lamstream media was stating how much of a record breaker it was but then in the end it was a wet fart.  Those women fighting over towels should haver turned it up a notch and fight for Chanel number 5

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:46 | 1973412 Milton Waddams
Milton Waddams's picture

just pull up a chart of one of the many publicly-traded 'dollar stores' (formerly five-and-dime stores, soon to be one hundred dollar stores) relative to, say, amazon, for an indication on retail trends.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:48 | 1973416 duo
duo's picture

I bought a Toshiba tablet from the Office Depot next door to the local Best Buy (litterally 30 feet from door to door).  OD and BB had the same price, wouldn't deal, but at least Office Depot didn't treat me like a criminal.  Salespeople were equally ignorant about the products at both places.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:49 | 1973421 My Taint
My Taint's picture

Go in. Price it. Then buy it online for less. The American Way!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:11 | 1973510 fuu
fuu's picture

And use the Amazon price ap to piss 'em off.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:48 | 1973417 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



Black Friday = Red Friday

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:50 | 1973427 Tsar Pointless
Tsar Pointless's picture

Considering that every thing you buy is up nearly 10% YOY (or much more in isolated/specific cases), the fact that retail sales unadjusted spending is up slightly more than 7% YOY doesn't sound so impressive, now does it?

My household will be reducing spending beginning now, as I am losing my job in two weeks. Two people, one unemployment check. I should turn that into a television series.

"You, Me and UC" or something like that.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:45 | 1973678 Absinthe Minded
Absinthe Minded's picture

Sorry to hear that TP. My father in law just got laid off, computer engineering, I wonder where his job went? Red dots come to mind though. No offense ORI. His wife has a disability and can't work, so there's another person we all have to carry on the UE max because of job outsourcing. Ain't life grand?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:08 | 1973837 therearetoomany...
therearetoomanyidiots's picture

Sorry to hear that Tsar, i've been there a while, 2 folks OOW and the one's remaining unemp runs out for good this week, for us.  


AM - one of the biggest bullshit stories on television is the one the MSM is floating for the past couple of months, in support of the corporations, that they can't find any candidates here to fill these high tech jobs.   That's why they need to rubber stamp green cards for indians and chinese to come here and do the engineering work.  Not to mention all the back door code those clowns can build into our most important systems, what happens when we don't get along with these countries?  


The reality is that the labor pool is CHEAPER there, it's cheaper to bring those bastards here to right all the code, design everything, because the US has too high a standard of living, and likewise, paychex.   This is what this whole thing is about...lowering our standard of living so that corporations can make more money.    Bye bye middle class, it was nice knowing you...



Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:32 | 1974017 Citxmech
Citxmech's picture

Bought a case of canning jar lids last month. Just checked what I paid and this month they went up $20.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:50 | 1973428 SnobGobbler
SnobGobbler's picture

actually is a loss if you account for inflation. best season eva'!!!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:51 | 1973430 youngman
youngman's picture

Well if I was a retailer...I would be analyzing this bigtime...its not a good business plan to give away everything on one day...and then to starve the rest of the time...the labor you have to hire and train for that one day is expensive too....

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:01 | 1973473 darkpool2
darkpool2's picture

If you can only fill your store with the bottom feeders, who have zero loyalty beyond give- away days, then its time to revisit your business model.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:17 | 1973538 warezdog
warezdog's picture

Talk about givaways, they had a promo to give away free subwoofer cabinets with a purchase of a subwoofer in late november. I found $50 subs and ordered one at a time to get a "free" dual 12" enclosure, repeated this 3 more times each time choosing to pickup the speaker at the store and have the cabinets delievered. Long story short the cabinets were 58lbs each and delivered by UPS and retail today for $179 each, go figure how they made anything since the subs I bought were on sale already for half price. Cabs sold on CL for $75 each and I broke even on the subs, thanks BB for netting me $300!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:06 | 1973487 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

I'm sure they did analyze it.  I wouldn't be surprised if holiday hiring isn't way up, with less people being full-time.  Additionally, I see Best Buy closing some stores next year to lower costs. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 14:17 | 1974834 batterycharged
batterycharged's picture

yeah, 120,000, didn't ya hear?  Good thing for economy pumpers those temp jobs don't show up in weekly claims.

All upside!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 15:47 | 1975332 batterycharged
batterycharged's picture


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:10 | 1973504 Snidley Whipsnae
Snidley Whipsnae's picture

youngman... Brick and mortar retail sales have been losing ground to on line sales since at least 1998 but since an enormous amount of money has been allocated to shopping centers the pace of brick and mortar collapse is relatively slow.

I see lots of closed and partially closed shopping centers in this area...and many homeless people wandering about aimlessly.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:00 | 1973795 therearetoomany...
therearetoomanyidiots's picture

"I see lots of closed and partially closed shopping centers in this area...and many homeless people wandering about aimlessly."

It's the truth.

And people say zombie movies are fantasy...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:54 | 1973434 augie
augie's picture

@Cdad That's dangerous talk. Could get you labeled an Alqueda sympathizer, best to keep shopping and take our pills.

Sent from iPhone

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:59 | 1973464 Cdad
Cdad's picture

No pills here.  As for what someone might label me, I'm not worried about that now.  "I have been to the mountain...I've seen the other side."

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:05 | 1973478 jeff montanye
jeff montanye's picture

"or associated groups".  to be specified at a later date.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:53 | 1973436 The Deleuzian
The Deleuzian's picture

QE III anyone???

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:01 | 1973471 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

That boy has cried wolf way too many times.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:06 | 1973488 The Deleuzian
The Deleuzian's picture

But the wolf finally came!  Wait...That story didn't end well did it...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:02 | 1973475 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



Nah.  Ben's not going to unleash the $Kraken on this.  Equities continue their decoupled levitation, so there's no visible market indicator to panic TPTB.  And the last round of ECB coordinated bank liquidization should buy them through 'til New Year's at least. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:06 | 1973489 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Nah, time to bring it all down. No one believes in nonsense QE anymore, its not 2008 after all, and no one is fooled.

Besides, 'QE' is what pisses off americans the most right now, they identify it with 'handing free money to the rich', last thing Obama wants with his all-time low approval ratings...and $4.50 gas in his election year? 

Its not going to happen.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:12 | 1973508 The Deleuzian
The Deleuzian's picture

Then the deflationary spiral has finally arrived...It was always lurking...Now for all to see, fangs and all!!!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:26 | 1973588 mayhem_korner
mayhem_korner's picture



Possibly.  But deflation (of durable assets) has been creeping in all along since '07.  OTOH, all of the digital liquidity that has been propping up the TBTF banks has been but a dribble into circulation.  So the inflationary effects of the prior QE and Twist efforts have not really been felt yet.

To me the question is when will the retail masses really start bank runs in earnest.  That's when inflation will break out and a more full abandonment of debt obligations (asset deflation) will also accelerate.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:33 | 1973619 The Deleuzian
The Deleuzian's picture

Good Lord!!!  Bank runs...That's all we need...That and more Zombie apocalypse TV shows!!!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:55 | 1973441 EasterBunny
EasterBunny's picture

If adjustment were made for everything except price, wouldn't this actually mean an inflation adjusted (even using government stats) decline in sales? Maybe I read this wrong....

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:25 | 1973575 r101958
r101958's picture


Edit: Of course, that is assuming they use real inflation numbers (as opposed to those published by the gov't) and that they actually publish that report.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:55 | 1973442 takinthehighway
takinthehighway's picture

According to SurvivalBlog, gun sales were way up on Black Friday.

Maybe the sheeple are starting to wake up...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:19 | 1973552 TSA gropee
TSA gropee's picture

To a limited extent probably, but my take is that those non-kool-aid drinkers are realizing more and more that lead is the other precious metal and that their delivery systems probably won't lose value.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:55 | 1973444 John Law Lives
John Law Lives's picture

Time for FT to float yet another bailout rumour re. the EU...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:59 | 1973465 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Rumors now have about a half hour effect? Better save it till 3:30.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:56 | 1973449 kralizec
kralizec's picture

Ho! Ho!  Oh, &$#@!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:57 | 1973454 Sardonicus
Sardonicus's picture

has SWHC or TASR reported sales yet?  That could make a difference. 

Some shoppers may have reallocated their spending after the shootings and mace attacks.

We might be okay yet.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:58 | 1973455 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

And the Wall St media whores are exposed once again. So much for their gushing over the RECORD black Friday nonsense. 

So sorry, it didnt work pump jockeys.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:58 | 1973456 chunga
chunga's picture

Is this adjusted to reflect firearm sales? Headline on Yoohoo. This is insane.

U.S. Retail Sales Rise for Sixth Straight Month
Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:41 | 1973644 therearetoomany...
therearetoomanyidiots's picture

"Retail sales rose 0.2 percent in November, the Commerce Department said Tuesday. That's lower than October's gain, which was revised higher to show a 0.6 percent increase. Still, more spending on retail goods is the latest sign that the U.S. economy continues to grow at a slow but steady pace.

The report is the government's first read on monthly consumer spending,"


This is the psychotic telling the psychiatrist everything's okay...and the media is the psychiatrist telling the family, everything is okay...and, viola, we have a massacre...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:59 | 1973457 TideFighter
TideFighter's picture

YoY Pepper Spray sales were outstanding. For 2012 Christmas, go long tasers and .380 snubbies (purse size).

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:59 | 1973460 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

Then there's the shrinking product phenomonon...Recently noticed that dunkin doughnuts have gotten smaller, the Ocean Spray Cranberry Sauce can has gotten shorter, the toilet paper rolls have gotten narrower.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:00 | 1973468 TideFighter
TideFighter's picture

Stop shopping at the mini-mart.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 09:59 | 1973461 Non Passaran
Non Passaran's picture

Great call TD!

It's nice to see last week's hype surrounding the 5am deal unravelling fast as well. Finland is having second thoughts, the UK doesn't seem so "isolated" any more, etc.

Perversely, I've begun to enjoy fake good news - because they always turn out to be well, fake, but without any embarrassment on the side of MSM and political fucks who make them up as they go. Hilarious!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:00 | 1973470 SamAdams1234
SamAdams1234's picture

Dont worry, Lil' Lindays Graham, McCain and Liberman will have the USA in a Keynsian Warr in IRAN and SYRIA.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:04 | 1973483 MFL8240
MFL8240's picture

More lies from the goverment pupets!  What a fucking clown show!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:08 | 1973484 island
island's picture

As Howard Davidowitz is quoted in an article on 12/2:

“If you look at the high-end customer, they don’t participate in early rushes,” Davidowitz said. “They ignore it as complete madness. So, nothing that exciting happened (this Black Friday). The hysteria is everywhere and the message is, of course, wrong.”

"At the end of the day, if you want to know ‘How’s business?’ the answer is not so good and that’s the truth.”



Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:05 | 1973485 Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

There is no sustainable recovery and there have been no prosecutions.  Geithner and Bernanke have been failing and yet they remain in their respective positions. More debt, more QE, more media lies, more risk, and larger too big to fails. Now it appears that Obama gets re-elected on failed policy and no accountability. Unbelievable.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:11 | 1973511 island
island's picture

Couldn't agree more.  The government has been totally captured.  A two party system where people pick the lesser of two evils is just a drawn out trip to hell.  We need to 1. get money and undo influence out of politics, and 2. proportional representation. 

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:06 | 1973490 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:10 | 1973506 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

LOL 47 inch LED....2 dollars.

PLEEEEEEEZE someone buy our crap we've been stuffing the channel for months, we'll just leave it out back come and TAKE it!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:16 | 1973532 fuu
fuu's picture

A Craig's List IPO would solve our problems.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:12 | 1973515 tarsubil
tarsubil's picture

Thank you. Man, things are just getting too f'ing grim for me lately.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:14 | 1973524 Snidley Whipsnae
Snidley Whipsnae's picture

Banzai... Where is the $29.95 reverse engineered drone aircraft?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:39 | 1973643 karzai_luver
karzai_luver's picture

Sams Club members only !




Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:47 | 1973685 fuu
fuu's picture

That's cheaper than those little micro helicopters!

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 11:08 | 1973850 marcusfenix
marcusfenix's picture

Obama- "hello is this the Iranian dept of foreign affairs?"

Iran- "yes, who is this?"

Obama- " uh this is president Obama"

Iran- "who?"

Obama- "president Obama from the United States"

Iran- (crickets)

Obama- "ok, well listen it seems that you may have mistakenly taken one for our recreational model airplanes into your possession"

Iran- " we do have one of your top secret, uber high tech, super stealth drones in our possession at this time, yes that is true"

Obama- "no,no I think you misunderstand, it's just a fancy RC car that can fly, something the boys in Afghanistan use during their down time to relax, you know have some fun, it reminds them of home"

Iran- " it has high tech digital recorders and cameras"

Obama- "yeah well...we have some landscape photography nuts, and the scenery is very nice in Afghanistan, lots of...sand and rocks"

Iran- "it has carriages for missiles and bombs"

Obama- "oh, well that's, hunting you know? Americans love to hunt, it's in our DNA"

Iran- " hunting?"

Obama- " yeah you know it's deer hunting season and well, we did want our boys to miss out so..."

Iran- "deer hunting?"

Obama- "yeah, yes..yes"

Iran- " in Afghanistan?"

Obama- "sure"

Iran- "with hellfire missiles?"

Obama- " yeah, well listen, this is all just a big misunderstanding and we are really sorry it strayed into your airspace, so I was wondering, could you maybe send it back, we'll happy to pay for shipping?"

Iran- (unintelligible shouting in Arabic, but obviously cursing in stunned disbelief)

Obama- "um, hello?"

Iran- " I'm sorry but I do not believe that will be possible at this time"

Obama- "oh well, could you maybe blow it up then? maybe you could invite the Swiss ambassador to watch, he umm, likes to watch things...explode"

Iran- "no" (click)

Obama- "oh well, at least I tried, now where is that report written by Donald Rumsfeld ten years ago that proves beyond a shadow of any doubt that Iran has a fully working version of the bomb? ahh there it is, now then we'll just change the date to today, and the authors name to...ahh...somebody from the IAEA and viloa'... hmm I wonder if I will squeeze another nobel peace prize out of this?"

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:14 | 1973493 virgilcaine
virgilcaine's picture

Deleveraging in the consumer mkt continues.. way too many stores to few "buying" customers.. I think most just go to the mall to walk around.

The best buy experience ranks right up there with Mcd drive thru.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:08 | 1973498 The Deleuzian
The Deleuzian's picture

Long Passports???

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:09 | 1973503 Sardonicus
Sardonicus's picture

obama would not have it so easy if the republicans would stop fielding candidates that are better suited for birthday party clown jobs and also if they quit catering to the "wal-mart shoppers for jesus" crowd.

this country has become a sickening joke

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:12 | 1973512 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

We'll never make it till election day...and even if they could manage that feat somehow, THEN what?

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:20 | 1973561 The Deleuzian
The Deleuzian's picture

I concur...Whatever THEN what is...It ain't good...That's for sure...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:28 | 1973536 virgilcaine
virgilcaine's picture

Deleveraging..the  Global Economic pyramid is built upon chinese wall board, creaky floor boards and a broke us consumer. It's done.

 "Ghost Chinese Disneyland".. it about sums it up where things are.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:22 | 1973566 drivenZ
drivenZ's picture

Do these numbers include online sales? If not they're obviously sorely lacking. I wouldnt go jumping to conclusions. ZH was also calling for negative GDP prints for Q3, so they're not infallible


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:33 | 1973615 youngman
youngman's picture

but for a state that needs huge sales tax revenue increases and labor increases...internet shopping is not a good way to sales property employees...same product...less benefit for society

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:39 | 1973649 drivenZ
drivenZ's picture

good point, but that's less of a reflection on the state of the consumer and more on the resulting economy

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:26 | 1973591 marcusfenix
marcusfenix's picture

looks like the santa claus stimulus came up a tad bit short this year...

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:36 | 1973630 PulauHantu29
PulauHantu29's picture

Hard to believe anything in MSM nowadays. It's like the weather...better to open the window and look outside for yourself.

Tue, 12/13/2011 - 10:49 | 1973699 Ying-Yang
Ying-Yang's picture

Big sales numbers will come during the week AFTER Xmas then......... lookout below. January will be dead as a doornail. The after Xmas sales will NOT save the buying season as the New Year will bring death and despair to retailers. The early price cuts will impact margins and retailers everywhere will cut payrolls more than last year. It is going to be a hard cold winter with no sales increases going into Spring.


Tue, 12/13/2011 - 12:20 | 1974292 skepticCarl
skepticCarl's picture

The 6% year over year sales increase looks o.k. to me.  I think that the retail sales are showing neither a strong recovery nor a bust, but confirm the current slow growth of the overall economy.  No, it's neither good nor bad news, just ho hum data.

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