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Sorry Yahoo, Hopefully Third Time Will Be The Charm

Tyler Durden's picture





 

Next time Microsoft offers to buy you, you say yes.

  • YAHOO SAID TO LEAN TOWARD DIVIDEND, BUYBACK INSTEAD OF SALE
  • YAHOO SAID TO CONSIDER SELLING ASIA ASSETS ALONE

 That's right - another "take under." Sorry to anyone who bought this stock on a take out/13F clone play.

 

 

 


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Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:21 | Link to Comment HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

ZH must be in Atlanta, Bitchez!

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:23 | Link to Comment HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

FWIW, Yahoo = Google. 

In 2001.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 19:24 | Link to Comment Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

yahoo= google facebook crappy online news 1.0

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 21:39 | Link to Comment Aguadulce
Aguadulce's picture

You're giving them too much. Lycos circa '98......bitchez

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 04:41 | Link to Comment malikai
malikai's picture

Altavista, bitchez!

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 04:03 | Link to Comment FinHits
FinHits's picture

Yahoo, please google "repeated failure".

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=repeated%20failure

 

no game
  Characterized by having it all on the surface (good looks, education, money) and yet failing miserably with the opposite sex, likely due to a personality flaw (ex. pretension, misogyny, excessive prissyness). 
Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:26 | Link to Comment HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

Everyone drunker than me, Bitchez.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:27 | Link to Comment HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

Intrevention, bitchez.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:30 | Link to Comment HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

typo, bitchez

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:29 | Link to Comment HelluvaEngineer
HelluvaEngineer's picture

_mce=bogus bitchez

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 22:14 | Link to Comment Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture

Dude ... time to hit the sack. ROFL

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:29 | Link to Comment FunkyMonkeyBoy
FunkyMonkeyBoy's picture

... All forgotten about by Monday.

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 01:13 | Link to Comment Silver Bully
Silver Bully's picture

What was that? I wasn't paying attention again.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:44 | Link to Comment NOTW777
NOTW777's picture

when do they simply move to china and show them what true censorship can be

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:52 | Link to Comment greensnacks
greensnacks's picture

Softbank unravelled Ziff Davis like this a few years ago and some of the same people sit high up in Yahoo's Corp. governence. They shed ZD's magazine, TV, conference and other divisions, issued new shares for ZDNet, paid a dividend, then merged ZDNet with CNet. I would expect they do something very similar with Yahoo and Microsoft or Google. Same initial concepts being explored and the same people calling the shots.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:48 | Link to Comment g1ass
g1ass's picture

sorry, slightly off topic i know.. im not sure if this has already been on here or not, been in work all day but

 

the bbc is reporting that germany just "FOUND" an extra 55bn euro's lying around in a nationalised bank, the kicker its called hypo real estate... it's almost just starting to get a bit, well sad.

 

link   http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-15503097

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 19:28 | Link to Comment Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

THAT story is funny.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 18:53 | Link to Comment jcaz
jcaz's picture

Jerry Yang get baked again?   Idjit.....

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 19:18 | Link to Comment oceanview76
oceanview76's picture

A cool $55B Euro's "found" by the Germans.  Riiiiight.  Mommy, Daddy!  Look what the fairy godmother left under my pillow!  They didn't even have to waste the ink  and paper to print the money, what a bargain.  Tomorrow's news?  Greece finds $550B euros in a cookie jar in grandma's house.  Every citizen now returns back to work with full pensions and perks.  

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 01:16 | Link to Comment Silver Bully
Silver Bully's picture

Burlesconi found some money in his couch cushions after his date left. Herr Merkel was always loose with her purse.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 19:16 | Link to Comment midgetrannyporn
midgetrannyporn's picture

YHOO makes money, lots of worse companies around. I don't see the problem other than they should have taken MSFT's offer. Spilt milk bitchez.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 19:44 | Link to Comment peekcrackers
peekcrackers's picture

the year 1999 called and said they want there .com bubble back

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 19:36 | Link to Comment SwingForce
SwingForce's picture

Here's the dope: Buy YHOO. Convert all ads to Google's Adsense, collect big monthly check. Not a new idea, that's what AOL does. Chaz Bono's on, gotta go (puke).

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 20:01 | Link to Comment JuicedGamma
JuicedGamma's picture

Funny thing is that early on the Google boys came over to Dave Filo and he gave them a hand up.  In business don't ever help your competition, buy them out or fuck them over.

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 22:49 | Link to Comment Fish Gone Bad
Fish Gone Bad's picture

Here is an even funnier thought: Yahoo was one of the dogs Goldman Sachs brought public.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 20:33 | Link to Comment ricocyb13
ricocyb13's picture

Yahoo's only growth-area are its chinese Alibaba-Group assets. Instead of focusing and working together with Alibaba, they are selling it because of stupid shareholders demanding for this. Their core market in the US is saturated, no growth there. The only clever guy is Jack Ma. Wrong strategy again.

 

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 05:39 | Link to Comment frank888
frank888's picture

Mmhh.

 

You should go have a look the the agreements between YHOO and Alibaba. Its a VIE structure. In short these kind of structures are just there to turn the chinese laws, there are not legal... Xinhua has indicated ( during the conflict between MA and YHOO about ALIPAY ) that they will clean that up soon...

 

In short, the value of their participation can be close to..ZERO if the chinese want !

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 20:33 | Link to Comment Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Sorry YHOO, I parted from your free data collection spamville years ago. Seems like only yesterday when I signed up for Netzero (free internet dialup access) and was tortured with Nigerian emails about wealth redistribution opportunities.. Today, I have a native email, high internet speed and no spam to deal with.

Shhhhhhhhh, don't tell any Apple phone owners--- using the cloud is no different than MSN, Yahoo, AOL, etc. Your information is populated and guess what? Spam will begin to appear on your phone. What a fucking poorly managed marketing plan Mr. Steve Jobs did. When your current phone plan exceeds incoming email/text.. Your carrier will penalize you. Meanwhile, the importance of Gaia and reducing fossil fuels will ring throughout new car, home, appliance, phone, TV, computer, toilet, and whatever they dream up ad campaign.

It's all good, as long as you pay for service increases to fund (example, our 4G LTE system that doesn't exist). Don't mind those pesky charges on your bill. We need your Ponzi funds (capital) to build our new system that we currently advertise on TV. Without those taxes, we cannot raise enough capital to deliver what we already told you that is available.

 

All the Ponzi scams models fall under the same pretense.. Repeating again, " new car, home, appliance, phone, TV, computer, toilet, and whatever they dream up ad campaign."

 

Sorry for my rant. This bullshit gets so old.

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 06:58 | Link to Comment JuicedGamma
JuicedGamma's picture

Netzero software installed viruses on my computer.  Biggest PIA ever.

 

Do NOT ever use Netzero for any reason!

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 09:31 | Link to Comment Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

The Netzero era was about 12 years ago for me, I lasted about a year under their free internet service, then migrated to MSN's $19.99/month dial up plan.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 20:48 | Link to Comment The Fonz...befo...
The Fonz...before shark jump's picture

I told them to check the sofa cushions

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 20:53 | Link to Comment molija6
molija6's picture

Daniel Loeb just penned an angry letter so hard. 

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 21:33 | Link to Comment Raskolnikoff
Raskolnikoff's picture

I remember using YHOO before the first bubble burst in early 2000, it was a great site with fantastic stock boards and many links providing info about many companies on Nasdaq and other indicies. The design of the message boards and info provided for each company and sector was great, now with two bubble bursts and a third one appearing to be the charm, YHOO really sucks and the stock boards are dead and the only thing left are what appear to be political robot posters slinging mud at each other.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 22:10 | Link to Comment Taint Boil
Taint Boil's picture

 

 

Yahoo is nothing but a virus that infects your entire computer. Had a Yahoo e-mail once but had to cancel the account because I couldn’t stand the full page ads when I had to log in.  Their ads LMAO, their personals LMAO ha ha ALL FAKE and is a joke (from what I hear). Tell you what let me Google that for you So, for all you morons in your mother’s basement …. Hate to break it to you but  SHE IS NOT REAL. Yahoo is nothing but a huge advertisement and I would go as far as to say everything you read on Yahoo is a paid insertion.

 

Yahoo belongs with the "Flip that house" .......... 1200 sq ft ranches with broken windows going for $700,000 ha ha ha. We all know how that turned out.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 22:30 | Link to Comment Westcoastliberal
Westcoastliberal's picture

It makes zero sense for Google to even propose buying Yahoo because that would seal the deal on their monopoly.  It makes a lot more sense for MSN just to buy them as MSN is serving the ads as it's set up right now.

Yahoo had a window of opportunity to at least equal Google and they blew it; went the wrong way.  But Yahoo can still deliver advertiser results, especially combined with Bing!

Why the hell they put their users through the transition to MSN's interface (which was inferior) is way beyond me.  And another unreported faux pas was how they handled the accounting when they switched...it took months and repeated requests to get refunds from the old system after the new had "cut over".

There's a lot you could do with the old Yahoo "Panama" system (which users suffered through for months as they did their "beta-testing" live online.  But the end result was pretty cool; in some ways even better than Google's ad system.

MSN needs to just buy Yahoo and be done with it.

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 07:03 | Link to Comment greensnacks
greensnacks's picture

It makes a lot of sense for Google to inflate the price so a competitor has to pay more for it.

And while everyone is eyeing Microsoft and Google as potential suitors for whatever remains of Yahoo in 5 months, I wouldn't discount AOL too. Check out Eric Hippeau's career. This guy ran Ziff-Davis, was part of SoftBank Capital and went on to become a director of Yahoo? Well he was the CEO for the Huffington Post too, which was bought by AOL recently. If Alibaba and Yahoo Japan are sold, what is left is a few internet assets and alliances with AT&T. The amount of redundancies that could be eliminated by a merger between Yahoo and AOL could be beneficial to shareholders, but maybe not so good for employees.

Fri, 10/28/2011 - 22:41 | Link to Comment Godisanhftbot
Godisanhftbot's picture

 The yhoo stock message boards alone are worth 50 billion.  whats the matter with these people ???

Sat, 10/29/2011 - 05:24 | Link to Comment frank888
frank888's picture

Mmhh..

 

My view is that YANG and the other founder ( who have together around 10% of YHOO ) want to take it private. Right now they do not have enough money to get the control alone.

 

So, they will sell the Asian assets ( it seems without taxes ? ) then give back the money to the shareholders. Roughly they will get 1.2 billion US$ ( 12 Billions for YHOO ) . May be they will give back also the cash actually in YHOO.

 

Once that will be done they will take YHOO private.

 

I cannot see why the above should be necessarily bad for the actual shareholders ?

Mon, 10/31/2011 - 02:58 | Link to Comment slvrizgold
slvrizgold's picture

Yahoo stock message boards are COMPLETE PIECES OF SHIT.   Just post anything critical of bankster, govt, Big Pharma, military-industrial complex, wars, etc etc.   AND THEN WATCH IT DISAPPEAR.    Yahoo censorship is like living in fucking China.   And all that pop culture crap is enough to make somebody puke until the dry heave.    Those guys are the fucking devil LOL.

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