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Twitter Hit By Major Service Outage

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Yes, Twitter is down for everyone, apparently impacting countries around the world. No need to strap on the kevlar vest and be on the look out for the stealth choppers...

 

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Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:47 | 2547668 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

No one will know I had diarrhea today.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:48 | 2547673 Conventional Wisdumb
Conventional Wisdumb's picture

I do!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:51 | 2547694 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

It's on. Internet and banking global shutdown taking place. You have just Won a vacation to FEMA camp Kalifornia.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:54 | 2547715 PY-129-20
PY-129-20's picture

Meanwhile in the UK:

"NatWest online banking meltdown: Millions of customers unable to move money or pay bills as accounts freeze"

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2162630/NatWest-Royal-Bank-Scotl...

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:01 | 2547735 sunaJ
sunaJ's picture

Comcast is down for me, too. Last hour. A rare event. Hmmm...

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:18 | 2547788 IBelieveInMagic
IBelieveInMagic's picture

Kitco is down for maintenance :)

Yahoo finance has no indexes.

Oh well, time to paint the tape.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:29 | 2547840 old naughty
old naughty's picture

wat...wat...happened?

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:17 | 2548076 prains
prains's picture

don't worry god's gift to everything the engineers are on it

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:48 | 2548181 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Comcast is down because they just suck. I always have problems with them.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 21:33 | 2549505 RiverRoad
RiverRoad's picture

How convenient.........Always seems to happen on market days like this.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:12 | 2547772 ACP
ACP's picture

So this sound like just a dry run for the real thing then, with a little realism thrown in.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:15 | 2547781 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

A little ugly on the side.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:33 | 2547718 Tippoo Sultan
Tippoo Sultan's picture

Do not panic. This is merely a regularly-scheduled HAL2012 government data mining op, which will be completed shortly.

Now, move along, folks. Nothing to see here.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 21:04 | 2549424 mjcOH1
mjcOH1's picture

Oh, the humanity.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:03 | 2547743 Hippocratic Oaf
Hippocratic Oaf's picture

Abso-fuckin-lutly. The FED is loading software. Freedom be damned!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:08 | 2547760 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

The camp with the difference, never mind the weather; when you're shipped to FEMA, the 'oliday's forever!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:07 | 2548037 CaptainObvious
CaptainObvious's picture

+1 for quoting the greatest album of all time.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:28 | 2548120 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Certainly on the short list. I'm a Quadrophenia fan meself.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 21:10 | 2549442 cruxofthebiscuit
cruxofthebiscuit's picture

"The price of meat has just gone up
An' yer ol' lady has just gone down . . . "

Not a personal reference, mind you. Except the meat part.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:49 | 2547676 fightthepower
fightthepower's picture

Fuck you Bernanke!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:51 | 2547693 NuYawkFrankie
NuYawkFrankie's picture

Post O' The Day ;)

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:55 | 2547714 DeltaCharlie
DeltaCharlie's picture

Bank Holiday begins!! Yay. 

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:14 | 2547776 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

Better close down my backyard

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:41 | 2547895 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

You say that like it's a bad thing. "Ignorance is bliss" applies here.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:47 | 2547670 FL_Conservative
FL_Conservative's picture

It's ALL going down now!  You can't resolve the issue if it's caused by central planning!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:48 | 2547677 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Mrs. Cog broke it. Sorry about that guys. :)

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:50 | 2547689 Dagny Taggart
Dagny Taggart's picture

lol - code eleven - twitter down

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:53 | 2547701 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Mrs Cog breaks everything she touches.

EVERYTHING.

<"What's that? Yes dear, I was only kidding.">

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:28 | 2547822 The Limerick King
The Limerick King's picture

 

 

My wife has an Amazon grip

What once was a gusher's a drip

Some pleasure, some pain

Some financial gain

There's no need to order a snip

 

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:55 | 2547973 The Limerick King
The Limerick King's picture

It has come to my attention that this limerick may contain some unintentional Canadiana ....some of us Canucks refer to a vasectomy as a "snip" (e.g. "He just got snipped"). My apologies for any confusion (You know what they say about explaining jokes.....I think it's the same for limericks!)

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:54 | 2547975 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

There is nothing to the rumor that Cog has been gripped and snipped.

Nuttin' I tell ya.

<Yes dear, I'll go shopping with you in a minute.>

Now where was I? :>)

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:29 | 2548125 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Wait - was that an octave higher?

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:49 | 2547680 Jonas Parker
Jonas Parker's picture

Oh no! My "tweets" have been "bleeped"!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:49 | 2547681 EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

With Twitter down, where will they announce that they'll be straight back up again?

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:49 | 2547685 BLOTTO
BLOTTO's picture

Twitter can be such a TWAT

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:51 | 2547688 CvlDobd
CvlDobd's picture

It went out about the same time the Dow stopped dropping. Must of been the inability of Tyler to spread truth so everyone bought the stocks lie.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:50 | 2547690 PersonalRespons...
PersonalResponsibility's picture

404 Bitzhes!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:53 | 2547706 g
g's picture

Twitter is stupid anyways, who cares.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:26 | 2547824 Strider52
Strider52's picture

WTF is "Twitter"?

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 20:29 | 2549321 Sokhmate
Sokhmate's picture

a virtual space to twat.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:53 | 2547708 john_connor
john_connor's picture

End of days

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:56 | 2547716 ThisIsBob
ThisIsBob's picture

Iran.  (And good for them.)

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:57 | 2547724 t_kAyk
t_kAyk's picture

Can we please do this to Farcebook?  Pleeeeeeaaase???

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:00 | 2547732 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

Mayans

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:03 | 2547745 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

There's more than one? :)

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:09 | 2547761 knukles
knukles's picture

(California Val Girl Voice)

Waaaaaiiit...
What's with that calendar if they're all dead already?

I doooon't get iiiit....

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:11 | 2547770 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

OMG

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:20 | 2547797 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

I am soooo not inviting the Mayans to my slumber party.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:07 | 2547758 spekulatn
spekulatn's picture

Bath salts, bitchez!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:02 | 2547741 Bob Sacamano
Bob Sacamano's picture

This might help June productivity.....

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:05 | 2547750 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

DHS?

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:24 | 2547813 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

No way. DHS love Twitter. One pass over the site and they know 99% of what American's care about at any given second on any given day.

And if they don't like what they see they can change that by tweeting just what it is they want everyone to think.

Social media. What a lie that is. Goebbels would be pleased.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:56 | 2547897 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

My point is that they may be doing some Digital Forensics...

+1 on Goebbels

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:05 | 2547751 traknologist
traknologist's picture

Anyone notice the simultainous 100 point drop in 2 minutes? lol 

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:06 | 2547752 Bullish Bear
Bullish Bear's picture

Twitter was brought down by everyone calling Restoy on his bullshit bank audit.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:07 | 2547756 RichardENixon
RichardENixon's picture

Bullish Smoke Signal training schools.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:16 | 2547786 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

long skywriters!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:07 | 2547759 Martin Silenus
Martin Silenus's picture

How will I tweet updates for my cat's blog?  That does it, I'm suing.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:10 | 2547766 Negro Primero
Negro Primero's picture

...and in Norway:

"Oslo Stock Exchange confirms massive attack"

Oslo Stock Exchange open web pages in recent days has been subjected to several attacks in the form of massive unwanted traffic. The site is currently taken down and are not available to external users. The following pages are not available: www.oslobors.no www.osloabm.no www.osloborsvps.no We apologize for the inconvenience.
http://translate.googleusercontent.com/translate_c?hl=en&ie=UTF8&prev=_t...
Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:15 | 2547783 traknologist
traknologist's picture

Sounds like a pretty good reason to black out twitter to me!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:13 | 2547773 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Glitch in the Matrix. PETA got pissy about using cats...

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:21 | 2547804 John Law Lives
John Law Lives's picture

"Twitter Hit By Major Service Outage"

Good riddance.  Too bad it can't be permanent.

 

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:25 | 2547815 chunga
chunga's picture

Moody’s Said to Be Poised to Announce Bank Downgrades Today

Moody’s Investors Service has told banks it may later today announce downgrades of the credit ratings of as many as 17 lenders and securities firms with global capital markets operations, according to two people with knowledge of the plans.

 

The announcement may come after the close of trading in New York today, said one of the people, who asked to not be identified because the information is private.

Bank Run!

 

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:25 | 2547818 WAMO556
WAMO556's picture

AT&T internet down in SoCal

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:25 | 2547821 Practical Irrat...
Practical Irrationality's picture

Think of all those poor Algos that are unable to think straight without keywords from Twitter.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:27 | 2547826 Nader_Nazemi
Nader_Nazemi's picture

Time to fry my hard disks. 

I can see MIBs out on my front porch. 

Better yet, let me get my shotgun ;)

But twitter just like Failbook are fads. 

 

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:48 | 2547869 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Say hi to Elvis. And as mentioned in other posts, it's 00-slug-00-slug (or alternately, slug-00-slug-00...) until full.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:32 | 2547850 ChrisDG74
ChrisDG74's picture

What the fuck is a "Twitter?"

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:34 | 2547855 NotApplicable
Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:46 | 2547922 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

I'll take "What rhymes with dot com balloons of the 90's" for $200 Alex.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:47 | 2547929 NuYawkFrankie
NuYawkFrankie's picture

Re Twitter hit by major service outage

 

How Tweet It Is!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:56 | 2547980 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

2 up arrows.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:50 | 2547951 canardo
canardo's picture

Twitter down, world ends.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:02 | 2548015 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

YouTube at 2300 GMT.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:02 | 2548018 Negro Primero
Negro Primero's picture

...nope, all the contrary!

Twitter goes down, productivity skyrockets

"In the aftermath of this social media tragedy, I offer my sympathies to anyone who is suffered Twitter withdrawal symptoms like I am and invite him or her to seek comfort on my or on msnbc.com tech's Facebook pages."

(MSNBC's Rosa!)

 

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 13:55 | 2547981 mrktwtch2
mrktwtch2's picture

my lady friend's pussy is down for maintenece (that time of the month) but should be up and running by sunday..is this news i should put on twitter..lol

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:06 | 2548034 Lost Wages
Lost Wages's picture

If Twitter keeps crashing, that means the site is going downhill and people will start leaving... which means an IPO must be right around the corner.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:18 | 2548089 cougar_w
cougar_w's picture

I have the next service to replace Twitter loaded onto a web site right now.

no /sarc

They are going down.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:09 | 2548041 Negro Primero
Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:32 | 2548132 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

#WhileYouWerePretendingToWork

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:17 | 2548077 Roland99
Roland99's picture

Shitter

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:19 | 2548092 JohnG
JohnG's picture

It's back for now.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:34 | 2548135 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

It's working again. I guess I can put the AR back in the closet.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:36 | 2548144 Budd aka Sidewinder
Budd aka Sidewinder's picture

Mark Zuckerberg: You froze the account.
Eduardo Saverin: I had to get your attention, Mark.
Mark Zuckerberg: Do you realize that you jeopardized the entire company? Do you realize that your actions could have permanently destroyed everything I've been working on?
Eduardo Saverin: We have been working on.
Mark Zuckerberg: Without money the site can't function. Okay, let me tell you the difference between Facebook and everybody else; we don't crash, ever! If the servers are down for even a day our entire reputation is irreversibly destroyed.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:40 | 2548155 matrix2012
matrix2012's picture

just read over all the amusing posts at twitter about its outage :) just search "OUTAGE" there!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 14:47 | 2548179 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Nope it's dead again...better get the AR back out.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 15:25 | 2548331 Dead Canary
Dead Canary's picture

Yes, yes! An eagle just circled my house three times and flew south. Also, I examined the entrails of some road kill in front of my house. There were THREE livers. Bad omens indeed!

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 21:11 | 2549444 mjcOH1
mjcOH1's picture

My cat his filled his litterbox.  And the Fresh Market was out of Dirty Bastard Ale.

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 16:00 | 2548516 John Doeman
John Doeman's picture

UGNzai supposedly behind the attack. 

 

http://cylaw.info/?p=1042

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 17:28 | 2548844 Umh
Umh's picture

Maybe the NSA tap went down?

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 21:04 | 2549398 cruxofthebiscuit
cruxofthebiscuit's picture

"The price of meat has just gone up
An' yer ol' lady has just gone down . . . "

(Mis-placed post ... please move on.)

Thu, 06/21/2012 - 21:08 | 2549437 mjcOH1
mjcOH1's picture

Eagerly awaiting the twit-valanche when service is restored?

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