Uncle Obama Wants You! ... To Bail Out Europe

Tyler Durden's picture




Just the headlines. They speak volumes:

OBAMA SAYS U.S. `READY TO DO OUR PART' TO RESOLVE EURO CRISIS. - BBG

OBAMA SAYS SOLVING EURO CRISIS OF `HUGE IMPORTANCE' TO U.S. - BBG

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Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:08 | 1921828 1835jackson
1835jackson's picture

Where do I even start?

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:12 | 1921870 CPL
CPL's picture

By purchasing m16's and crates of bullets.

 

Glad the US taxpayers are on the hook for it all.  Isn't that nice of Europe?  Suckered into catching the Queens' and Kings of europe's farts and then calling them all roses.

 

 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:18 | 1921932 Rahm
Rahm's picture

By dropping a deuce in the white bowl.  They can take that deposit to the bank!  Bitchezz

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:26 | 1921997 flacon
flacon's picture

Looks like we are going to have to start trading more paper money for real gold again.... 

 

"A sentiment of trust in the legal money of the State is so deeply

implanted in the citizens of all countries that they cannot but believe

that some day this money must recover a part at least of its former value.

To their minds it appears that value is inherent in money as such, and

they do not apprehend that the real wealth, which this money might have

stood for, has been dissipated once and for all.

 

This sentiment is supported by the various legal regulations with which

the Governments endeavor to control internal prices, and so to preserve

some purchasing power for their legal tender. Thus the force of law

preserves a measure of immediate purchasing power over some commodities

and the force of sentiment and custom maintains, especially amongst

peasants, a willingness to hoard paper which is really worthless...

 

If, however, a government refrains from regulations and allows matters to

take their course, essential commodities soon attain a level of price out

of the reach of all but the rich, the worthlessness of the money becomes

apparent, and the fraud upon the public can be concealed no longer."

 

John Maynard Keynes, Economic Consequences of the Peace, NY, 1920, p. 239-40

 

 


 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:28 | 1922035 camaro68ss
camaro68ss's picture

just put it on my credit card, i still have a few thousand left on it. Who cares anyways, my grandchildern will be footing the bill and there not even born yets so lets keep this party going.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:29 | 1922046 BaBaBouy
BaBaBouy's picture

WOW .... USa Hell Starts ...

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:39 | 1922135 Troll Magnet
Troll Magnet's picture

shit...i am not going to say anything negative about our commander in chief.  he deserves our utmost respect.  

(did you read that, NSA?  i only praised obama.  please don't assassinate me)

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:55 | 1922243 Manthong
Manthong's picture

If the Fed could commit $7.77 to in 2009 to select banks, there is nothing stopping it from committing $777.7 trillion in 2011 to the entire world.

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2011-11-28/secret-fed-loans-undisclosed-to-congress-gave-banks-13-billion-in-income.html

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:25 | 1922337 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

Economic policy dictates this.

Understand only that.

The reigning economic policy, the ONE the world uses, dictates lowering the curencie's value to increase price, to maintain "stability".  It is written in every single textbook and taught by all the PhDs.

Inflation is a mandate when "dealing" (in the case of the NWO, they have dealt it) a crisis. 

It is like back 40 and 50 years ago when frontal labotomies were prescribed to mentally ill patients.  Bernanke is in the business of economic frontal labotomies.  He, Lagarde, and the Heads of State (Obama, Sarkozy, Merkle) have cut your brains out.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 17:22 | 1922812 JohnG
JohnG's picture

Lobotomies are actually still done, ECT too....I thought they had stopped.  My Dr. said they still did, I just had to ask.....

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 17:49 | 1922901 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

 

 

No kidding?    Well that does explain a lot of what's going on in academic circles then.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 21:09 | 1923637 GenX Investor
GenX Investor's picture

Kudos to Zero Hedge for getting a shout out on "seekingalpha.com"  Way to go y'all, keep the establishment honest. 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:58 | 1922254 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

I'll start it then.

I have been writing this for a long time, and I get junked more than anything for this, but the IMF is coming for your souls.

The Global Banking Cartel, the New World Order, wants no one to be sovereirgn.  Not people, not Nation States, no one and no thing can have their rights.  This is because these fuckers want all the power; every last ounce of it.

They have wrecked your economy, they have destroyed your means.  Now they will take you last right of thought and free will.  You will owe them everything.

The IMF is coming for your souls.

It is beyond where it was two years ago when I started writing this.  This is now a means to save yourself.

BUY SILVER

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:08 | 1922363 Troll Magnet
Troll Magnet's picture

Hendrix,

I think they're already here.  Been here awhile.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:23 | 1922426 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

We had some time to do something about it.  We had time to gather a force and take back our rights.  That time is gone.  Save yourselves.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 22:21 | 1923807 DosZap
DosZap's picture

Lennon,

We still have time, and more than enough RESOURCES to take it back,when it gets BAD enough we will.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 17:00 | 1922681 Sunset chaser
Sunset chaser's picture

True, true, but the good news is they've been lying to us so long they have started to believe their lies.

Case in point; they are still paper trading along with the rest of us, instead of having already bought up all the gold and silver. There's your edge over them.

They appear to be having some success getting governments to sell off tangible public assets like property/relics to pay down paper money debt. Countries that are agreeing to do this are beyond stupid. The debts will end with the banks.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 19:34 | 1923336 el Gallinazo
el Gallinazo's picture

Same here, Troll Magnet.  Actually I am dedicating the following Grateful Dead song, Dire Wolf (Don't Murder Me) to Obama.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hhqyg_dTaTg

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:43 | 1922157 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

$$$ USD is world's reserve currency.  Gotta break it out to help the Europeans  It is only fair.  /sarc

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:47 | 1922194 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Told ya this morning that the summit would be a covert bailout.

Here's what Van Rompuy had to say after the meeting. Language very suggestive:

 

Europe&US remain partners of 1st & last resort. Our "entente cordiale" was a mainstay in the past&will remain so in the future

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:35 | 1922511 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Well then, last and final resort it is.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 18:04 | 1923024 NumberNone
NumberNone's picture

It's called a suicide pact...

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 17:44 | 1922946 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

 

 

Ya know if the shoe was on the other foot I would certainly expect the French would line both sides of the Champs-Elysees in droves supporting the U.S. in kind.

 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 21:22 | 1923673 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

A Bright future awaits you in comedy! :>D

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:51 | 1922220 J 457
J 457's picture

I hope you just forgot the <sarc>. 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:11 | 1922387 Whoa Dammit
Whoa Dammit's picture

Obama can put it on Moochelle's Sapphire Card if he insists upon helping out.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:30 | 1922037 BaBaBouy
BaBaBouy's picture

.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:19 | 1921939 saiybat
saiybat's picture

m16s and bullets. Don't forget clips, lots of clips and and a genuine ak47. You need a m60 too and a colt 45. Hell, get a howitzer too and bullets for it.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:25 | 1922006 CPL
CPL's picture

I'm getting a sharp stick and a rock.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:26 | 1922015 saiybat
saiybat's picture

Get one of those with a grenade launcher

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:10 | 1922383 dracos_ghost
dracos_ghost's picture

Case of Tequila and a tab of acid.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 18:58 | 1923231 NuckingFuts
NuckingFuts's picture

Make mine a double.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:25 | 1922010 MarketTruth
MarketTruth's picture

Don't forget about your need for trained snipers with their 50 and spotter in tow.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:45 | 1922178 saiybat
saiybat's picture

Yeah I forgot about a sniper rifle. Get a barret .50 but really you don't even need that you can kill somebody a mile away with a desert eagle .50 they take the same bullets anyway so you can put your desert eagle clip in your barret

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:47 | 1922576 Manthong
Manthong's picture

..not so subtle sarc

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:36 | 1922108 sabra1
sabra1's picture

what about towels? you need towels, you know!

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:03 | 1922324 GenXer
GenXer's picture

$1.28 Chinese towels that use poisonous color dye. Beat up whomever is around to secure your supply of towels bitchez

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 19:28 | 1923315 Matt
Matt's picture

Towlie says: Don't forget to bring a towel. http://www.spike.com/video-clips/5mqqb4/best-of-towlie 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:57 | 1922267 XitSam
XitSam's picture

M16s use magazines, not clips.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:30 | 1922487 Vergeltung
Vergeltung's picture

yep. heh, the novices always give themselves away.  :-)

 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 17:26 | 1922834 JohnG
JohnG's picture

+ .223 * 30.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:43 | 1922530 saiybat
saiybat's picture

Sports Illustrated?

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 17:00 | 1922687 SWRichmond
SWRichmond's picture

But the magazines themselves are reloaded via clips, or at least they can be.

I found this pictorial for those who are city boys and don't have any fucking idea what they're talking about:

http://www.instructables.com/id/How-to-load-an-AR15M16-magazine-using-St...

 

 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 21:25 | 1923683 Dave Thomas
Dave Thomas's picture

Oh and don't forget lots of Tannerite for blowin up beavers!

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:28 | 1922478 Atlas Shrugging
Atlas Shrugging's picture

They're called magazines, or mags.  I dare you to go on a gun forum and use the word "clips"!

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:57 | 1922664 tekhneek
tekhneek's picture

Yeah. That's the 4 rules I give to all first timers that I take to the gun range.

  1. Never shoot a gun sideways ("gangster style").
  2. Never call a magazine a clip.
  3. Never look down the barrel of a gun, even if you're 100% sure it's empty.
  4. Never aim the gun anywhere (up/down) other than down range.

Pretty much covers it all.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 17:46 | 1922955 SilverRhino
SilverRhino's picture

Clips are for Garands and Moisan Nagants

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 23:59 | 1924013 Bagbalm
Bagbalm's picture

They are called magazines.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:22 | 1921978 Kaiser Sousa
Kaiser Sousa's picture

by using said firearm to blast a mother fucking banker and a banker owned, bitch made politician...

next.....

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:58 | 1922281 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

CPL wrote:

Glad the US taxpayers are on the hook for it all.  Isn't that nice of Europe?

Bullish for GE, since it won't cost them a cent.

 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 17:48 | 1922406 The Big Ching-aso
The Big Ching-aso's picture

 

 If Europe doesn't fail because we bail them out but then we fail because we did bail them out, what would that make us?

a.  Dipshits

b.  Rubes

c.  Slaves for life

d.  All of the above

 

If you picked d.,  All of the above, congratulations your I.Q. is over 80.

 

 

 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:34 | 1922510 UnderDeGun
UnderDeGun's picture

Cheaper Than Dirt. 500 bulk pack 556 for 98 bucks.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 18:05 | 1923031 JohnG
JohnG's picture

Reload.  For 98 bucks I can reload several thousand.  Just anneal the tips of the casings and they last a lot longer....sit them in a pan of water filled almost up to the neck and heat them red hot with a torch and tip them over.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 23:00 | 1923906 ZeroHour
ZeroHour's picture

Are you referring to TulAmmo (AMM-2905)?  Have you used this ammo before in an AR? 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:58 | 1922650 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

CPL Said:

"Glad the US taxpayers are on the hook for it all.  Isn't that nice of Europe?  Suckered into catching the Queens' and Kings of europe's farts and then calling them all roses."

 

Exactly.

Gradual rescission of the Magna Carta and the march back to serfdom and indentured servitude for the masses.

Mass media is so effective in training the baser instincts; just look at all the salivating "shoppers" on crack Friday.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 18:02 | 1923021 earleflorida
earleflorida's picture

deliciously aromic is the smell of one's shit vapors, well said

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:14 | 1921892 Chief KnocAHoma
Chief KnocAHoma's picture

Obama: Shut up bitches and eat those freaking peas!  We must bail out Europe because they gave me a Peace Prize and they still like me. Plus me and that French dude joked about that Jew guy and it was really fun.

 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:14 | 1921896 economics1996
economics1996's picture

Kill the PIIGS.  Live free or die.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjYLRxHWKiQ

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:35 | 1922100 Troll Magnet
Troll Magnet's picture

Vote for Ron Paul or live your life as a slave!

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:15 | 1921901 Unprepared
Unprepared's picture

A reverse round kick to his chin would get you warmed up.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:17 | 1921924 jdelano
jdelano's picture

It is time to impeach this f$#king idiot.  

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:32 | 1922072 Tommy5454
Tommy5454's picture

He is a puppet, there is only one man running right now who is any different. However, the fact that Obama is coming out for this ensures that it will get politicized and therefore maybe will not pass the Republican Congress because they like to play games and pretend to be on opposite sides. If they really wanted to resolve this at the expense of the American People the Fed would jsut open up swap lines further or print. I think that those of us who do not want to bail out Europe should take this as a good thing because it means it will never get done.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:43 | 1922162 Everybodys All ...
Everybodys All American's picture

Impeach the puppet and then whoever else wants this new world order bs.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 19:48 | 1923374 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

If impeachment was in the cards, it would have happened during the first term of George W. "Chimpy" Bush, not the third term.

 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:21 | 1921964 Mike2756
Mike2756's picture

Sounds like stage 3.

http://youtu.be/HSD1d-6P6qI

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:35 | 1922097 Normalcy Bias
Normalcy Bias's picture

Bammy's got to keep his minstrel show going long enough to get him past the 2012 elections...

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:37 | 1922117 Mactheknife
Mactheknife's picture

>Where do I even start?

How bout...How is any of this "our part"?

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:43 | 1922160 Troll Magnet
Troll Magnet's picture

goldman sachs...jp morgan...that's "our part."

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:40 | 1922141 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Bailing out European govt "workers" and the banksters.  Still - ZH has loads of union goons and Obama lovers.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:07 | 1922246 Pegasus Muse
Pegasus Muse's picture

OBAMA SAYS U.S. `READY TO DO OUR PART' TO RESOLVE EURO CRISIS. - BBG

It's bend over time for the American Taxpayer.  Just take it like a (wo)man and think positive thoughts.

 

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:56 | 1922659 dirtbagger
dirtbagger's picture

Obama doesn't give a popcorn's fart about Europe unless they are sending him campaign contributions.   This is more of the same old shit exactly.  Bailing out US banks who have been stupid enough to hold European Bank asset backed bonds and derivatives as collateral and then releveraging these worthless assets forty-fold.

Think of it as MF Global on Steroids with the US Taxpayer holding the supposedly segregated accounts.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:57 | 1922266 totem
totem's picture
  • Obama says "Europe's problem boils down to a lack of new plans."
  • Obama says US will 'do our part' by sending a plane-load of planners to help Europe.
  • Obama says "Plans underway to create a bi-partisan 'Super-Planner-Selection-Committee' in congress."
Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:23 | 1922460 XitSam
XitSam's picture

Germany won't bail out Europe. ECB won't print to save Europe. And Obama want me to pay for Greeks to retire at 52?!

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:53 | 1922642 Ruffcut
Ruffcut's picture

Is he that uncle that is always accused of molesting the little ones?

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 17:23 | 1922817 digitalhermit
digitalhermit's picture

OBAMA SAYS SOLVING EURO CRISIS OF `HUGE IMPORTANCE' TO U.S. BANKS - BBG

There. Fixed it for ya!

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 23:11 | 1923922 Chuck Walla
Chuck Walla's picture

Shove huge stick up taxpayer's arse, break off, rinse and repeat until morale improves.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:08 | 1921829 dereksatkinson
dereksatkinson's picture

I'm sure it will be the Fed + IMF

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:26 | 1922012 CPL
CPL's picture

IMF is an extension of the FED for third world loan programs under food for guns program.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:29 | 1922048 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

Wrong. Fed + IMF are two very different tentacles of a squid. *wink*

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:40 | 1922137 CPL
CPL's picture

Shit sorry! 

 

Forgot that we are supposed to talk about the agencies as if they are separate even though they reside on the same network infrastructure and building in NYC.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:28 | 1922042 Captain Kink
Captain Kink's picture

The Fed will purchase $2T worth of Heidelberg Printing presses, and then print with said presses the $2T to make payment.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 16:20 | 1922434 Stax Edwards
Stax Edwards's picture

The money room over at the fed has been littered with their catalogs lately.  The pages are all stuck together on the one addressed to Ben.

Dis: Long Heidelberg

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:09 | 1921835 fonestar
fonestar's picture

Ladies and gentlemen, get ready to PRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRINT!!!!!

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:09 | 1921837 non_anon
non_anon's picture

hey hey O, say it ain't so

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:09 | 1921839 Larry Darrell
Larry Darrell's picture

Fuck Obama and his handlers.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:15 | 1921907 fonestar
fonestar's picture

keep your powder dry

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:18 | 1921934 Concentrated po...
Concentrated power has always been the enemy of liberty.'s picture

best comment I've read in months.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:21 | 1921968 Larry Darrell
Larry Darrell's picture

I felt it would convey how I feel, even if it didn't spell out all of the fact finding that led me to feel this way.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:43 | 1922165 Freddie
Freddie's picture

Careful.  More than a few on ZH love the muslim.

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 15:11 | 1921840 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

OBAMA SAYS U.S. `READY TO DO OUR PART' TO KILL USD.

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