This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.

Unelected European President Holiday Humor

Tyler Durden's picture


For an unexpected dose of holiday humor, and a surprisingly spot-on prediction of the future of Europe's monetary system, we go to none other than unelected head of Europe, Herman van Rompuy himself.

And embrace change we must (not to mention stash and hoard just as Kyle Bass has done with nickels), preferably with open palms, as very soon no paper money, initially European and then generically speaking, will be left.


- advertisements -

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:07 | 2469736 Mark123
Mark123's picture

Did he steal that quote from Obama?  What a full blown twit!!!!!!

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:09 | 2469742 Concentrated po...
Concentrated power has always been the enemy of liberty.'s picture

yes, he should have a sex change. he and obumma should both move Forward! with this immediately.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:47 | 2469846 Aziz
Aziz's picture

All aboard the choomwagon, wait... I mean the changewagon...

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:31 | 2469950 Colombian Gringo
Colombian Gringo's picture

Real change would be tossing out his bald arse, except that somehow he was never elected....hmmm I wonder how that is possible in a so called democracy.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:08 | 2470021 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

I am in complete agreement with President Van Rompuy. The time for change is here. The current European economic system is simply not working, and is in dire need of economic reforms. I know nerdy libertarians are not going to like this, but the first thing that needs to be implemented in Europe is Eurobonds. It is simply impractical for struggling European countries to rely on their present convoluted relationship with the ECB. Once Europe is issuing Eurobonds, the ECB will be able to monetize European debt with ease, and the European commission will be able to finance rescue packages for struggling states WITHOUT tedious referendums. And don’t get me wrong – I too am personally very frustrated at European leaders. They have frankly proven to be impotent and timid in their efforts for a united Europe, and although their hearts are in the rights place, their actions have lacked the strength and authority that this crisis demands. 

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:10 | 2470025 falak pema
falak pema's picture

you have earned your bounusss

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:11 | 2470027 Colombian Gringo
Colombian Gringo's picture

Do you also think it is acceptable that the countries of Europe should become united, under an UNELECTED LEADER?

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:53 | 2470062 falak pema
falak pema's picture

Herr Barosso like his predecessors has been running the Euro commission since 50+ years; aka the commercial arm governing the common market  of EU. MR ROmpuy is just a door mat for Merkozy, who don't want to talk to the 25 others in the EU. So they get Rompuy to carry their message for them, their surrogate nation state colleagues. Just like Barosso does and all those others did for Mitterrand-Kohl etc; since the EU got serious about integration.

Nothing new there; the principle of EU is the nation states DECIDE on political front and delegate on commercial/economc front to the Commission who executes what the signed Treaties have established at NAtion state level, monitored in Crisis mode today by Merkel and Hollande; as before by Merkozy. Don't look at the doormat look at the masters of the house. Your question is meaningless once you understand how EU works. Majordomos of 10 downing street appear to have power like whitehall ushers; appear...not HAVE. To appear is NOT to have, its to have not. Ask Earnest. 

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 20:20 | 2470435 Poor Grogman
Poor Grogman's picture


Actually its soon to be "Emperor Van Rompoy" to you all.

just wanted to clear that up....

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:36 | 2470066 Blammo
Blammo's picture

I am increasingly disenchanted with democracy....If you want to exersize authority over others by seeking office, you have what I call a tyrant gene, and automatically self select as unworthy (in my view), whether elected or not...

I don't know what the solution is, but electing the glibbest of the glib, sure the hell ain't it.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:32 | 2470162 Matt
Matt's picture

You mean Representative Democracy.

There are other models; I doubt Direct Democracy can work beyond a municipal level.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 19:40 | 2470363 blunderdog
blunderdog's picture

Representative republic coupled with direct-democratic veto from the masses is probably about the only concept that hasn't been tried somewhere.  Something simple like "any law without 60% of popular public support" can never pass.

The basic premise would be: anything that couldn't garner the support of 60% of the public is too controversial for government to be given any power over it.

I personally don't see much point, but I recognize that a lot of folks want to be able to call the cops or seal the borders or get bankruptcy protection sometimes.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 19:50 | 2470382 nmewn
nmewn's picture

"Representative republic coupled with direct-democratic veto from the masses is probably about the only concept that hasn't been tried somewhere.  Something simple like "any law without 60% of popular public support" can never pass.

The basic premise would be: anything that couldn't garner the support of 60% of the public is too controversial for government to be given any power over it."

Hmmm...gonna have to grind on hand, I like it for the simple fact it slows the avalanche of bullshit edicts streaming from DC.


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 20:28 | 2470449 Poor Grogman
Poor Grogman's picture


I like the simplicity and functionality of it.

It may not have worked in the "mass media age" where it was/is easy to manipulate public opinion, but as an idea for the future...

In the "blogging age" it could definatly throw some sand in the gears of Statism. (war on .....) ism.  That type of thing.

The other advantage  is that everyone could support such a concept.

as you said.. worth chewing over...

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 21:43 | 2470557 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

Bottom line is that we don't all get to decide on the policies or directors of companies private or public unless we have some skin in the game i.e. shareholding.

So why do we have an electoral system where those that don't work, and don't have any capital employed have a say in the way we run the country? Universal suffrage doesn't work. The system should be, you don't pay taxes, you don't vote. Not until we stop giving power to those that will only take will we ever have an economy that thrives. Not until then can we have an environment where businesses can thrive and redeploy capital where it matters.

It simply isn't possible...

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 21:34 | 2470544 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Ancient Greek method of implementing law(s):

"Anyone wishing to propose a new law had to do so while standing on a public platform with a rope around their neck. If the law was passed, the rope was removed. If the law was voted down, the platform was removed."

Tue, 05/29/2012 - 03:16 | 2470910 Offthebeach
Offthebeach's picture

That is what a jury trial/jury nulification is all about. If 12. Citizen peers aren't all for the supposed law the it isn't a law. The people are the law. As it is now, represenitive government are the corporation tools for managerial control of the dumb, fat sheeple.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:57 | 2470196 jimijon
jimijon's picture

Well I have posited that the Internet makes for a new governance model that has not yet been implemented. The reason of course is change, real change always hurts the status quo the most. My political theory is what I call Socialocracy. Here we move all regulatory oversight to the people. This means that all corporations and government agencies must produce accounting and documentation to the public. 

Then the public will have full responsibility to see if company XYZ is really poisoning, polluting, stealing, drug running, laundering, etc. Transgression are brought to the Judicial system, which also then gets rated on its success or failure in agreeing with the findings of the people.

I have written more, and even have been thinking of a special website or such. Anyway, for my shameless promotion you can check out some of my writings at


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 21:35 | 2470546 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

"Why Nations Fail: the Origins of Power, Prosperity, and Poverty" by Daron Acemoglu, James Robinson; ISBN 0307719219

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 23:46 | 2470752 Harlequin001
Harlequin001's picture

and what makes you think you have or should have any rights to my private conversations, agreements and contracts with my private trading partners?

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:25 | 2470053 The Monkey
The Monkey's picture

What a load of bullshit. Talk about trying to put lipstick on a pig.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 18:59 | 2470284 tbd108
tbd108's picture

Pigs everywhere are insulted and likely to sue for slander!

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:59 | 2470108 rodocostarica
rodocostarica's picture

A Little lame this time MDB. But I still love your satire. Give us more bonds. It just makes us nerdy Libs that much more secure in our anti fiat gold and silver investments.  Do you think that any of us nerdy Libs want to see total worldwide chaos?

Actually I weould prefer not to need gold to protect myself. But alas you and your ilk (I know you really are a nerdy lib) have made this neccesary.


So fuck Rompuy and all the other asshats in Europe and in the US. That includes you Bernank and you too Obama and Romney.

We got us a bitch running Costa Rica and she just had lunch with the Pope today. Maybe even met the butler. Ineffective but she leaves me alone.

Meanwhile Tyler any chance you can cut us a special deal with Hula to allow access of the videos from third world countries like Costa Rica? I get this message:

Sorry, currently our video library can only be watched from within the United States


Pura Vida.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:04 | 2470122 nmewn
nmewn's picture


"Once Europe is issuing Eurobonds, the ECB will be able to monetize European debt with ease, and the European commission will be able to finance rescue packages for struggling states WITHOUT tedious referendums."

Why do you even need debt issuance at all?'s an unneeded step, just print up euros and pass em out, free money for everyone!

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 18:04 | 2470209 koperniuk666
koperniuk666's picture

Love ya MDB;  You've picked up where Robo trader left off......


Are you really Tony Blair??  Or some other out of work comedienne?


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 22:07 | 2470612 Fake Jim Quinn
Fake Jim Quinn's picture

I see things differently MDB. The Western Europeans are very hard working people; in those 35 hours per week they work, six vacation weeks for newbies, two more weeks for St. This and St. That holidays, they are extremely productive and deserve three to five years of unemployment insurance, rigid labor laws to protect them and overall protectionist trade policies to preserve their hard fought lifestyles. Without these, they could not discuss politics in cafes all evening and weekends and discuss how the Anglo-Saxon model of labor engagement is so barbaric. And it would allow those young ruffians to get work at the expense of the much older people who after all deserve the fruits of the heroic efforts during and after WW II, which they accomplished entirely on their own, and paid back whatever measly help they did get from barbaric capitalists.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:25 | 2470147 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Clicked on the link, and now am getting ads for "Win a dinner with Barack". If I can get a ride in the Choomwagon doing ceiling hits, I'm totally entering the contest.


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:27 | 2470151 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Slewie, you're ridin' shotgun.

Tue, 05/29/2012 - 01:07 | 2470836 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

i think i have a date with hanoiJane that nite, alphabetski...

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:30 | 2469761 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

"Herman van Rompuy"

I envision a Benny Hill skit involving a man with a big ass, striped pants, spats, a villianous moustache, franticall chasing a half dressed serving maid around the bedchamber.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:30 | 2470158 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Gully Foyle

Why do I always read it as Rumpy?

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:08 | 2469739 Trimmed Hedge
Trimmed Hedge's picture

He forgot about "hope"...

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:08 | 2469740 Mark123
Mark123's picture

What he really meant to say:


Debt serfdom is the only way forward. If we want to shape our future we must embrace debt. This is true for all European countries

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:32 | 2470065 The Monkey
The Monkey's picture

Not going to happen. It's already politically infeasible and it's going to get much worse before it gets better. It's a matter of physics at this point, not policy.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:24 | 2469750 tony wilson
tony wilson's picture

more change

no hope

just oblivion.


herman von goring ramrodpoy reminds me of the skit.

you would think death is bad enough but it geys a lot worse.

it never ends it never ends.


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:13 | 2469754 RiverRoad
RiverRoad's picture

Only problem is everybody's got their own definition of "change" over there...Maybe they should start with him.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:13 | 2469755 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

I plan to embrace change this afternoon when I heat up my grill...

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:05 | 2469882 Manthong
Manthong's picture

That 2,000 nickles from the clip is positive change.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:17 | 2469759 Popo
Popo's picture

Speaking of "Resisting change"....

"For the sake of historical truth I must verify that only the Greeks, of all the adversaries who confronted us, fought with bold courage and highest disregard of death."

Adolf Hitler, speech before the Reichstag, 4 May 1941

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:18 | 2469774 Hulk
Hulk's picture

"The Phalanx"  Coming soon to a European theatre near you...

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:17 | 2469765 sangell
sangell's picture

NIgel Farage nailed this guy when, to his face, he said he resembled nothing more than a 'bank clerk'.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:43 | 2469837 Non Passaran
Non Passaran's picture

That wasn't nice.

So Nigel later apologized - to bank clerks.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:53 | 2469853 tobus
tobus's picture

That was a really prophetic speech by Farage. See the bold section below. He predicts that Van Rompuy intends to be the quiet assasin of European Democracy and Europe's nation states. So far we've had 2 of Europe's great democracies replaced with pro EU pro Euro ex bankers and economists. Mario Monti in Italy and Papademos in Greece. Next will be the dissolution of sovereignty for all Eurozone countries with a centralised fiscal policy. It's really happening.

"You have the charisma of a damp rag and the appearance of a low grade bank clerk. The question that I'd like to ask, that we're all going to ask is: Who are you? I'd never heard of you. No one in Europe had ever heard of you.

I would like to ask you president: who voted for you? And what mechanism, oh I know that democracy isn't popular with you people, what mechanism do the peoples of Europe have to remove you. Is this European democracy?

Well I said though that you are competent and capable and dangerous, and I have no doubt that it's your intention to be the quiet assasin of European democracy and of the European nation states. You seem to have a loathing for the very existence of nation states."



Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:41 | 2470078 The Monkey
The Monkey's picture

This idea that Europe will come together under a federal umbrella is running completely counter to seniment in the streets. The hopes and dreams of policy makers oupled with the omnipresent central banks have set up one of the largest mispricings of risk, ever.

Prices are a mirage.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:41 | 2470175 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

mmmh... you are getting Farage out of context, IMHO.

If you want to understand his tirade against Van Rompuy, you have to watch a different YouTube item,

here (

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:17 | 2469766 Belarusian Bull
Belarusian Bull's picture


One of the best videos on the subject of "change"  out there.


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:18 | 2469772 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:07 | 2469894 Treason Season
Treason Season's picture
Why does John Malkovich want to kill me?

In 26 years in the Middle East, I have never read so many vile and intimidating messages addressed to me. Many now demand my death. And last week, the Hollywood actor John Malkovich did just that, telling the Cambridge Union that he would like to shoot me.




Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:08 | 2470022 falak pema
falak pema's picture

so you are robert fisk? or his spokesman?

Tue, 05/29/2012 - 10:53 | 2471684 Treason Season
Treason Season's picture

Dear Mr. Free Wheeling Freddy Free Prose Falak Pema,

 Punctual punctuaction shall it be.


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:18 | 2469773 Jena
Jena's picture

First CityWide Change Bank     "It's What We Do"

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:32 | 2469808 djsmps
djsmps's picture


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:33 | 2469810 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

Translation:  "Austerity for you plebeians, more money for central banks, profligate governments, and apparatchiks like me."

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:37 | 2469820 ivana
ivana's picture

pure Gollum ... where does NWO find all these creatures?

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:39 | 2469825 web bot
web bot's picture


<finger tapping> I'm waiting... I'm waiting....

Where's Nigal Farange? 

I'm waiting...

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:55 | 2469848 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

i think they may have shot the bloke for trying to chew rumpoy's face off

here's some more funnies from scotland and libya:

Libyan PM Tells UK will Co-operate in Lockerbie Investigation

yes!  they are gonna re-open the case, BiCheZ! 

Libya's interim prime minister Abdurrahim El-Keeb reaffirmed his commitment to co-operate with Scottish authorities over the 1988 Lockerbie atrocity, telling Lord Advocate Frank Mulholland the issue was a priority but asked for clarification (as recorded by slewieNewz):

>>>dearLord:  wtf?

>dear interimPM: panetta wants the CIA cleared by a blue-ribbon panel of fuktards

>>>dearLord:  anette who? 

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:00 | 2469869 web bot
web bot's picture

Hey Slewie,

Did you ever think in your lifetime that you'd see the western world coming apart at the seams? The financial overlords have a lot to answer for...

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:28 | 2469938 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

yep!  1971 comes to mind, LTCM,... web-bo_T

i tell my buddy:  i've been fuking wrong for 40 years, now!

he sez:  slewie!  you are right!  the world just hasn't realized it, yet...


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:36 | 2470167 Jendrzejczyk
Jendrzejczyk's picture

Research Matthew Gannon and Lockerbee. The rabbit hole goes deep.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:55 | 2470195 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

they're gonna frackin frack that hole

you can bet yer alphabetski on it

iran did it 

to israeli students from syracuseNY?

yeah!  that's the ticket!

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:40 | 2469828 pcrs
pcrs's picture

WHat does the #cyprus mean?

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:12 | 2469906 Conrad Murray
Conrad Murray's picture

Cyprus is the next target the unelected vultures of the EU wish to see overturned and brought into the full clutches of their homogenized, multikulti, destruction of democracy and sovereignty, plan for enslavement via odious debt.

#cyprus = pound cyprus = pound the people of cyprus into submission to our evil plan of domination by usurpation.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:24 | 2469934 pcrs
pcrs's picture

Is he twittering with 'cyprus' ?

These people are dangerous but also completely nuts.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:20 | 2470044 magpie
magpie's picture

Nah, it's a playground he can't touch.

The kids are too big so he can only prattle about with the Obamao's second hand slogans.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 18:02 | 2470174 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

@ pcrs: #cypress

that is code for the cypressOverpass on oakland which pancaked during the first game of the bayBridgeWorldSeries during the 1989 lomaPrieta quake

she's comin down!  pancake breakfast on mainStreet?  L0L!!!

Cypress pic

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 14:44 | 2469842 valley chick
valley chick's picture

I can only hope that there is a special place in hell for these socialist, marxist, communists leaders.  :/

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:07 | 2469893 Satan
Satan's picture

I can guarantee it.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:59 | 2470074 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture

Nah, hell's been full up for decades.

Admittedly we made room for Nixon, but after that we had to turn on the 'No Vacancy' sign and turn away lots of lost souls.

Last I heard, everyone's been hanging out in limbo, hell's waiting room.

Ya know, there's been talk of adding a 10th level in hell to hold all these new souls, but after the Facebook IPO fiasco, I just don't think Jamie Dimon and JPMorgan can be depended upon to raise the needed construction funds.

Gotta go, the minions are holding a big bash for Bono and even the Great Satan has to RSVP.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:29 | 2469945 MiddleageThinni...
MiddleageThinninghair's picture

Why can this video only be streamed in the USA?




Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:17 | 2470135 css1971
css1971's picture

There is something other than the USA?

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:48 | 2470185 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

somebody isn't happy w/ lizzy_36?

what video?

the syrians have been bad and can't watch TV till wednesday?

poirot sez so?

bifurcation of internet toobs by bankstering/spook/MSM interests?

yer wlcm!

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:35 | 2469962 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Change is the only way forward. If we want to shape our future we must embrace change. This is true for all European countries 

Change brings with it the following options: fight it. accept it and make decisions based upon what have learned or deny it and print.

In your case Mr. NWO you'll be buying nickels and printing.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 18:15 | 2470229 monad
monad's picture

"Change" is their universal PC threat form. It means "Do it our way or we'll have to dispose of you. Do not inconvenience us. Resistance is futile. Sooner or later, we'll wear you down. Look, kittens! Awwww"

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:44 | 2469974 alfman
alfman's picture

rompoystiltskin forever!

he's president of the united states of europe, presented by wall-street/the city.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 18:16 | 2470232 monad
monad's picture

Rompoystiltskin! Rompoystiltskin! Rompoystiltskin!


Nope, didn't work. Quick, get an axe.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 15:49 | 2469984 PontifexMaximus
PontifexMaximus's picture

Unglaublich! What a big, big scumbag, makes me vomit! Who the hell allows this douchebag a platform to perform his rubbish? A pure non-valeur!

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:02 | 2470011 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

Hey Hermie, what's this we shit?

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:03 | 2470014 magpie
magpie's picture

Another case of Marie Antoinette syndrome.

Pass the bread.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:23 | 2470041 The Final Countdown
The Final Countdown's picture

Holiday humor as in 'ha ha that's funny' humor, or as in 'some kind of sick perversion' humor?

l guess the latter, as I don't see anything to laugh about here.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 16:43 | 2470082 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture

Maybe you should toke on a Philly Blunt for awhile and come back before the munchies start a callin'.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 17:20 | 2470138 The Final Countdown
The Final Countdown's picture

I'd rather not spoil good grass by stuffing it in a cigar, but maybe you can relay your advice to van Rompuy's twitter, he looks like the kind of guy who enjoys cigars. He might actually even tweet something worth laughing about that way.

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 18:23 | 2470250 Pure Evil
Pure Evil's picture


Mon, 05/28/2012 - 18:19 | 2470239 azzhatter
azzhatter's picture

I imagine this Von Rumpoy as a guy who got picked on a lot in school, probably got knocked around a little. He looks like a pussy boy. I suspect he's getting even for a lot of shit that came his way because he's a punk. Fuck him, hope he dies in a fire

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 20:57 | 2470497 potlatch
potlatch's picture

Change the punchline on the part2 clip of the SNL bank skit:


"People ask us how we make money, and we say, trust."

Mon, 05/28/2012 - 22:52 | 2470683 Pairadimes
Pairadimes's picture

I believe that's pronounced 'van Rump Boy'.

Tue, 05/29/2012 - 01:30 | 2470851 Inthemix96
Inthemix96's picture

Herman, barroso, benedit-cohn, the whole lot of you cunts, fuck off and leave us alone you two bit second grade fuckheads.

Seriously, put a fucking monkey in a suit, couldn't do a worse job than any of these fucking shysters.

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!