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USS Enterprise Holding Drills To Attack Made Up 'Faux Theocracy' Shahida States And 'Pesky Garnetians'

Tyler Durden's picture




 

A few days ago we presented some speculation on what the final deployment of the 50 year old USS Enterprise aircraft carrier in the Arabian Sea may mean from a strategic standpoint, today we get to hear it from the US Navy itself. And just when we thought we had heard it all, we now get confirmation that the farcism that has defined capital markets for the past 3 years is slowly migrating to military planning. "The carrier and its entourage of support ships are in the Atlantic Ocean, somewhere east of Florida, with land completely out of sight. But for the purposes of the drill, they’re cruising near the fictitious Treasure Coast. Maps displayed on the bridge’s monitors show the contours of the Eastern Seaboard, the Gulf of Mexico and a good chunk of the Midwest, but all state borders have been removed and replaced with a handful of countries that come with their own boundaries and political allegiances. Enterprise and its strike group are focused on Garnet and North Garnet, countries that support terrorism on the Treasure Coast. They’re fundamentalist Shahida states — a faux-theocracy — and they want to reunite with Pyrope, one of the nine other made-up countries. On Enterprise, intelligence analysts evaluate the situation, fighter squadrons plan sorties, and the ship’s newspaper, “The Shuttle,” prints an extra section that details the international political situation. It’s a novella set at sea that grows more complex as hours past. “Those pesky Garnetians,” strike group commander Rear Adm. Walter Carter Jr. told sailors after a day packed with maneuvers, launches and landings."

But lest anyone get the pesky though that this is all just a ridiculous way to hide the true ambitions of the carrier, we get the following: "The Navy says the training isn’t specifically tailored to a possible U.S.-Iran scenario.“We’re training for all the mission areas,” said Rear Adm. Dennis FitzPatrick, commander of Strike Force Training Atlantic. Those include anti-submarine warfare and counterpiracy missions." But then again: "The drills do have applications for potential tension with Iran, however. Treasure Coast includes a fake strait about 200 miles east of Orlando that, like the Strait of Hormuz, is about 35 miles wide at its narrowest point.“There obviously is an emphasis on where we think the ship will go,” FitzPatrick said."

More humor from the Navy Times on what is currently going on at the USS Enterprise:

Capt. William Hamilton stands on the footrest of his chair on the bridge, looking through a window and down at the flight deck below. A mechanical pencil, a notebook and an iPod Touch with a stopwatch program are all within arm’s reach.

 

The skipper is trying to prove his ship can quickly launch and recover airplanes, one of the requirements to certify the Navy’s oldest carrier as ready for its 22nd and final deployment.

 

The 50-year-old Enterprise is expected to deploy this spring to 5th Fleet. The launch-and-recovery drills at the end of January were part of a composite unit training exercise, a comprehensive final exam designed to prepare the carrier and its strike group for any type of operation, emphasizing those it is most likely to encounter when it deploys.

 

Besides launching and landing aircraft, the strike group is preparing to rescue fishermen captured by pirates, much like ships of the John C. Stennis Carrier Strike Group have done recently. The ships also are practicing cruising through contested straits, a drill that will prepare them for any possible tension with Iran as they pass through the Strait of Hormuz.

An aircraft carrier... the third one in the region...being used to "rescue fisherman captured by pirates"...     :0

The farce goes on:

When Hamilton isn’t watching the flight deck, he squints behind his wire frame glasses and scribbles details into the notebook or clicks off splits with the stopwatch app. He’s like a baseball statistician tracking every pitch, hoping that his team is ahead of the count. He wants each launch and trap to take a minute or less, and he knows how close each one comes down to two decimal places.
...
For now, Hamilton is fixated on launching and recovering aircraft as quickly as possible. Timing is important because the ship must hold a steady course and speed during such operations, making its movements predictable and an easier target for an attack. The faster the carrier can launch and recover aircraft, the sooner the ship can take evasive maneuvers and throw off enemies.

 

Even though one of the forward catapults is down for repairs, things are working out well for Hamilton. Then the evaluator throws him a knuckleball: There’s an issue with a tanker, and they need to figure out a solution. It will cost the carrier time, but it will train the crew to handle complications that could occur during a real mission. The evaluator diplomatically tells Hamilton that he shouldn’t worry about it hurting his score — he’s just a few minutes into his launch cycle but already ahead of schedule.

Frankly, we are at a point where we fail to see where reality ends and where The Onion begins. For anyone who wishes to befriend CVN-65 Enterprise on facebook can do so here.

 

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Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:16 | 2131130 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

Pesky wabbits

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:31 | 2131181 Silver Bug
Silver Bug's picture

The war games continue to intensify. Hopefully this year doesn't go postal.

 

http://ericsprott.blogspot.com/

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:46 | 2131233 ACP
ACP's picture

This all sounds like an episode of Star Trek.

Garnetians?

Why doesn't Kirk just threaten them with the Federation's secret weapon - carbonite?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:09 | 2131327 HoofHearted
HoofHearted's picture

The whole explanation sounds like, "These are not the droids you're looking for."

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:16 | 2131354 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

"Luke - you're ghey."

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:32 | 2131434 Spastica Rex
Spastica Rex's picture

Prime. Directive.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:08 | 2131584 Slartebartfast
Slartebartfast's picture

Uh...er....I believe you meant - corbomite?  Carbonite was Star Wars.  Let's get our silly references straight, shall we?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:57 | 2131542 Centurion9.41
Centurion9.41's picture

The "games" and scenarios are part of EVERY deployed battle group's STANDARD OPERATING PROCEDURE. 

Before everything went digital, every time battle groups passed each other, one into theater to take station and the other leaving station, they executed a battle plan turnover that included all the classified charts, records, etc., from the theater war gaming of prior battle groups.

The only difference today, there's nothing to turn over.

Only a fool thinks the military that isnt CONTINUOUSLY planning and playing out war scenarios.

To point to war game activity as a solid indication of war build-up is simply the fantasies of an ignorant fool.

And the names of the good & bad guys are thought up by young officers, most under 30 years old.  Remarkably similar to the fascinations and machinations of many of the posts in ZH.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:43 | 2131714 Joe Sixpack
Joe Sixpack's picture

Probably true, but still worth a blog post.

Mon, 02/20/2012 - 14:30 | 2178066 Centurion9.41
Centurion9.41's picture

The point at which a "probably true" question becomes a lie of deception is determined by the knowledge and intent of the one making the assertion.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 17:31 | 2131936 Matt
Matt's picture

Just curious, is the 9.41 a reference to Texas Penal Code?

Mon, 02/20/2012 - 14:23 | 2178047 Centurion9.41
Centurion9.41's picture

Actually, no Matt.  The origin of the name is biblical; a nexus of the Centurion who considered himself not worthy and the warning of the millstone.  That said, I love the connection to the Tx penal code.  It fits perfectly with the overall philosophy of the pseudonym.  So I consider your question a great fortune.  Thank you for asking!

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:43 | 2131711 Randall Cabot
Randall Cabot's picture

August 1914 anyone?

 

'Israeli attack will prompt Pakistani response'

February 5, 2012

A diplomat based in Islamabad said on Sunday that an Israeli attack on Iran would force Pakistan to support a Iranian response, according to the Israeli website Ynetnews.com.

Both Russia and China have said that an attack on Iran would be an attack on their national security.

"Iran is our close neighbor, just south of the Caucasus. Should anything happen to Iran, should Iran get drawn into any political or military hardships, this will be a direct threat to our national security," Dmitry Rogozin, Russia’s deputy prime minister and former envoy to NATO, said in mid-January.

"China will not hesitate to protect Iran even with a third world war," said Major General Zhang Zhaozhong in December.

http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-4185684,00.html    

 

 

 

 

http://www.infowars.com/diplomat-says-pakistan-will-retaliate-if-israel-attacks-iran/  

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:53 | 2131264 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

Listen up bitchez!

http://www.2exodus.com/Alois%20Irlmaier%27s%20Prophecy%20page.htm

(Alois Irlmaier a native German, a simple, devout Christian he was interviewed by writer Conrad Adlmaier in the nineteen fifties and what he said assumes an ominous new significance, particularly in the light of recent developments. In essence he saw the approach of another world war, asked what causes this war, he responded:)

Everything calls peace. Shalom! Then it will occur -- a new Middle East war suddenly flares up, big naval forces are facing hostility in the Mediterranean -- the situation is strained. But the actual firing spark is set on fire in the Balkans: I see a 'large one' falling, a bloody dagger lies beside him --then impact is on impact. Two men kill a third high-ranked. They were paid by other people. One of the murderers is a small black man, the other a little bit taller, with bright-colored hair. I think it will be at the Balkans, but I cannot say it exactly.

After the murder of the third it starts overnight. I see quite clearly three numbers, two eights and a nine. But I cannot say what it means and cannot state a time. The war begins at sunrise. He comes along very rapidly. The farmers sit in the pub playing cards, when the foreign soldiers look through the windows and doors. Quite black, an army comes from the east, but however everything occurs very rapidly. I see a three, but I do not know if it means three days or three weeks.

Massed units march from the East into Belgrade and moved forward into Italy. Thereafter three armored wedges immediately advance with lightening speed in the north of the Danube over West Germany towards the Rhine ñ without preliminary warning. This will occur so unexpectedly that the population flees full of panic to the west. Many cars clog the roads ñ if they had stayed at home or not used the main streets. Everything, which will be an obstacle for the rapidly advancing tanks on high-speed motorways and other fast motorways, will be down-rolled. I cannot see the Danube bridges above Regensburg anymore. Hardly anything remains of the big city Frankfurt. The Rhine Valley will be devastated, mainly by air.

I see three spearheads coming. The Russian does not stop anywhere, while running in his three wedges. Day and night they run in order to reach the Ruhr-district, where the many furnaces and fireplaces are. Day and night the Russians run, inexorably their target is the Ruhr-district.

Immediately the revenge comes from across the large water. However the yellow dragon invades in Alaska and Canada at the same time. But he comes not far.
And then it rains a yellow dust in a line. When the golden city is destroyed, it begins. Like a yellow line it goes up to the city in the bay. It will be a clear night, when they begin to throw it. The tanks are still driving, but those who sit in theses tanks become quite black. Where it falls down, everything will become quite dead, no tree, no bush, no cattle, no grass, this becomes withered and black. The houses still exist. I don't know what it is and so I cannot tell it. It is a long line. Who goes over this line, dies. Then everything in the spearheads breaks down. Nobody will come back anymore.

 

 


The airplanes drop a yellow powder between the Black Sea and the North Sea. Thus a death strip is created, straight from the Black Sea to the North Sea, as wide as half of Bavaria. In this zone no grass can grow let alone humans live. The Russian supply is interrupted.

From the east there are many caterpillars. But in the caterpillars everybody is already dead, although the vehicles keep rolling on, in order to gradually stop automatic. At the Rhine the attack is finally repelled. From the three spearheads no soldier will come home anymore.

The pilots throw off their small black boxes. They do explode, before they touch the soil, and spread a yellow or green smoke or dust. What comes into contact with this becomes dead, whether it is human, animal or plant. For one year no organism is allowed to enter this area, otherwise it will expose itself to the largest mortal danger. These boxes are satanic. When they explode, a yellow or green dust or smoke arises, everything that comes in contact to it, is dead. The humans becomes quite black and the meat falls off their bones, so sharply is the poison. nobody from these three armies will come home anymore.

Then I see someone flying, coming from the east, who drops something into the large water, so that something strange will happen. The water lifts itself as high as a tower and falls down, then everything is inundated. The whole action will not last long, I see three lines - three days, three weeks, three months, I don't know exactly but it wonít last long.

And then:

There is an earthquake. The southern part of England slips into the water. One part . . . disappears, when the thing falls into the sea. The countries at the sea are endangered of the water heavily, the waves go high as a house; it foams, as if it would boil. Islands disappear. A part of the proud island sinks, if the thing falls into the sea, which the pilot drops. Then the water lifts itself as high as a tower and falls down. What this thing is, I do not know. When it comes, I do not know.

During the war the big darkness comes, which last 72 hours. It will become dark at a day during the war. Then a hail impact, consisting of lightening and thunder, breaks out and an earthquake vibrates the earth. Please do not go out of the house at this time. The lights do not burn, except candle light, the current stops. Who inhales the dust, gets a cramp and dies. Do not open the windows, cover it completely with black paper. "Outside the death by dust goes around, many humans die. After 72 hours everything is over. But again: Do not go out of the house, do not look out of the windows, and keep the candle light burning. And pray. Overnight there will die more humans than in the two world wars before.

 


Do not open the windows during the 72 hours. The cattle falls, the grass becomes yellow and dry, the humans will become quite yellow and black. The wind drives the clouds of death off to the east.

The city with the iron tower (Paris?) becomes the victim of its own people. They ignite everything. Revolution is, and everything is going wildly.

The large city with the iron tower is on fire. But this has been done by its own people, not by those who came from the east. And in Italy it is going wildly too. They kill many people there and the Pope flees, but many clergymen will be killed, many churches collapse.

In Russia a revolution breaks out and a civil war. The corpses are so much that you cannot remove them off the roads anymore. The large ones among the party leaders commit suicide and in the blood the great guilty is washed off. I see a red mass mixed with yellow faces, it is a general riot and horrible killing.

The cross comes to honours anew. The Russian people believe in God anew. They sing the Easter song and burn candles in front of sacred pictures. By the prayers of Christianity the monster from hell dies; also the young people believe anew in the intercession of the God's mother.

If everything is over, a part of the inhabitants have died, and the people are frightened of God anew.

The laws, which bring death to the children, become invalid. Then peace will be. A good time. The Pope, who had not to flee across the water for a long time, returns. When the flowers bloom in the meadows, he will return and mourn for his murdered brothers. After these events a long, lucky time comes. But the people have to begin there, where their grandfathers began. End!

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:00 | 2131296 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

Gully please Fedex me whatever it is you are smoking.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:48 | 2131468 Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

News headlines Search: "3 Mushroom farmers get lost in the woods for 6 day's" Well, their home now. Explains alot.

http://www.chron.com/news/article/AP-Newsbreak-3-lost-in-Ore-considered-eating-dog-3048357.php

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:02 | 2131557 knukles
knukles's picture

"Roomhunter#1:  Like   uh     are we   uh       hmmm   home  yet  

 

"#2:  wuh        uh             t     ?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 17:52 | 2131795 Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

Family claims to have taken shelter in hollowed out tree for 6 day's, Authorities report, no hollowed out trees found in the alleged area, only sapplings.

According to the report from the young son, claims to Authorities that he is a fighter pilot and he lost his black boxes to drop over enemy territory. Sent to local SKIP unit for further evaluation.

Doctors still can't explain brown rings around families mouths, left Doctors baffled. More at 5:00

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:13 | 2131607 sushi
sushi's picture

Gully please Fedex me whatever it is you are smoking.

---

Just tell me how to position myself downwind. With what he's got just taking the breeze should be quite a hit.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 17:36 | 2131959 Max Hunter
Max Hunter's picture

Gully please Fedex me whatever it is you are smoking.

If you sign for that, it becomes a Federal crime..

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:30 | 2131427 blindfaith
blindfaith's picture

 

 

WOW...you almost had me pee my pants.  Screen play right?

god anew hugh...sorry moved and left no forwarding address.

********************************************

Diogenes was asked, "What is the difference between life and death?

"No difference."

"Well then, why do you remain in this life?"

"Because there is no difference."

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 19:06 | 2132228 OmPonzi_PonziOm
OmPonzi_PonziOm's picture

I had the same dream last night but I thought it was the Thai Food I ate.  You missed the part where the female anti-Christ and the the female Savior duked it out mud wresteling at Stonehindge.  You shoulda slept in.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 19:24 | 2132285 Dugald
Dugald's picture

Nostro Dumass plagiarised....

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 20:25 | 2132432 HardwoodAg
HardwoodAg's picture

Stay inside and drunk for 72hrs, and don't eat the yellow snow.

No problem

Tue, 02/07/2012 - 02:12 | 2133079 A Nanny Moose
A Nanny Moose's picture

Two men kill a third high-ranked. They were paid by other people. One of the murderers is a small black man, the other a little bit taller, with bright-colored hair.

So Heat Miser and Gary Coleman are going to kill somebody important? Wutchoo talkin 'bout Willis?

Tue, 02/07/2012 - 08:35 | 2133403 Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

So that's what happened to Sammi Davis Jr. and Ronald Mc Donnald?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 23:25 | 2132819 Buck Johnson
Buck Johnson's picture

Actually the Enterprise is looking at being decommissioned.  It would be a perfect target for a false attack in the gulf to say that Iran sunk it when in reality someone else did.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:17 | 2131133 Fluffybunny
Fluffybunny's picture

I don't see a problem. In military exercises you almost always have fictional enemies that atleast remotely replicate your probable enemies.

Heck, in the Finnish military the fictional enemies can always, with a bit of reading between the lines, be understood as the Russians.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:29 | 2131168 Alea Iactaest
Alea Iactaest's picture

[delete]

 

sorry

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:39 | 2131218 prains
prains's picture

faux attacks using faux fuel borrowed from faux friends using faux dollars,sounds about right fluffy?? where's my .22

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 23:40 | 2132846 my puppy for prez
my puppy for prez's picture

...and being reported 24/7 on Faux News... 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:35 | 2131431 Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

9/11 was a military exercise too. It was named, "Operation Bizarre Coincendnce" Just joking, It was called "Operation Northern Gaurdian" here is the link.

 

Don't seem so fukin far fetched anymore now does it?

http://www.oilempire.us/wargames.html

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:50 | 2131510 Cadavre
Cadavre's picture

.. ictional enemies that atleast remotely replicate your probable enemies.

I am of the opinion the only fictional and / or probable enemy we have is the chickenshit face that stares back at us from inside the mirror.

The Talmudic Dandies that smell of an altar boy's soured tuna sauce and self-convinced they're in charge of this game wanted to hit Syria for the same thing Bloomberg and the Mayor of Oakland have been doing to the OWS movement. The world is a poker game and everybody is holding the same royal flush - and yet - they're still throwing worrthless chips into the pot like somehow it will make a difference.

OWS is the "barking dog" that "does not bite". The next one will bite an` that be fer sure and when he jab that big yellow fang right down them usurper wannabes' throat and beleive me baby, it gonna hurt like protonic reversal on steroids - the dandies be dribbling yellow and red on the snow under their feet like a field dressed dickless buck that just had his musk glands pruned from it's inner knees.

What I loved most about the art ...

Capt. William Hamilton stands on the footrest of his chair on the bridge, looking through a window and down at the flight deck below. A mechanical pencil, a notebook and an iPod Touch with a stopwatch program are all within arm’s reach.

Unless he pull a Carnival Cruise Capitan number, hell "still" have his feet on the "footrest" after mooring the old lady dead center astride of Hormuz then get crispied  and drown as a couple of "our only friend in the middle east" Dolphin Class Wolf Pack subs send her to the bottom with a lavish :chosen" broadside for a butt fuck session with Davy Jones.

What walks the deck of the USS enterprise? I see dead people walking - when will our uniformed services employees realize that their benefits will the way of other pension funds - and that the protection they were promised for circumstances of dark demise are as valid as the words on the parchment at the Jefferson Memorial. GI: You want to take care of your family - then live - do not allow yourself to be a target for the claimants of Abraham's divine legacy placement.

The Kosher Nostra wants Hormuz closed - they've essentially closed it already - but now they need something for revisionary history canons they feed to the dumb downs on main street like SOilent Green - ooops - prescience gets fuzzy - will there still be a main street after the final reconciliation - will it look ike london bridge circa middle ages and generously garnished with the heads wearing the faces of all our CSPAN celebs rotting atop the prongs of "made in america" pitch forks?

You could hear the orcs hanging out at a Lexington and 59th Latte Parlor smaking their lips at the prospects of Hormuz being plugged. Just think of what all that action will do for the faux US GDP and the dollar carry.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:19 | 2131136 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

Actually, if it wern't for bombs and sundry things that kill in military hands, it is an on-going clown-show where only mediocrity can shine. 

Straight-jacketed, Moribund Mania. 

And I think this 'exercise" and it's ridiculous premise is just rubbing it in the world's faces and sending some big hints. Let's see if we can decipher those.

ori

/san-onofre-33rd-parallel-4th-7th-feb-/

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:22 | 2131145 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

Operation Irani Liberation, am I close?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:28 | 2131171 cossack55
cossack55's picture

I's likes it.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:29 | 2131172 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

:-) Well, the faux theocracy, Shahida is interesting.

Shahid in Persian and Arabic means Martyr.

hmmmmmm...... And pyrope. Pyr is Fire. 

Rope of Fire? 

That kind of deciphering.

Martyr and Rope of fire or Fire-rope.

Now what do you say?

ori

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:42 | 2131225 diesheepledie
diesheepledie's picture

or Martyr and Europe is on Fire

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:42 | 2131229 nevadan
nevadan's picture

The mineral pyrope is a member of the garnet group. Pyrope is the only member of the garnet family to always display red colouration in natural samples, and it is from this characteristic that it gets its name: from the Greek for fire and eye. Despite being less common than most garnets, it is a widely used gemstone

Nice try but it looks like a mineral theme what with Garnet and North Garnet as terrorist countries.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:45 | 2131237 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

Unless they chose Garnettia so that Pyr-rope would work?

Code is never in your face you know? ;-) 

ori

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 17:47 | 2132000 Meta Fundamentalist
Meta Fundamentalist's picture

Let me guess, the carriergroup calls herself 

Goldmanite ?    :)

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goldmanite

 

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:47 | 2131240 Cocomaan
Cocomaan's picture

Yep, you beat me to it. Call the country Shaheeda means that our government has no intention of negotiating with anyone.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:56 | 2131280 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

I doubt your average NA citizen has heard of this word. Sounds like 'our' gubmint is in someone else's hands. It's cool though, I'm sure they're righteous just keep paying them taxes.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:02 | 2131303 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

I think the only code being broadcast to NA sleeple is : Look, big, shiny ships and roaring aircraft and afterburners and go go go!!!!!!

Shahida and Pyrope is for someone else.

ori

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:49 | 2131250 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

Oh regional Indian

"Do you know what a shit rope is Julian? It's a rope covered in shit that criminals try to cling to. Y'see, the shit acts like grease, and the harder you tighten your grip, the more you slide down it"

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:08 | 2131325 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

I was unaware of that meaning for Shahida- had to look it up. Additionally, a verb; to witness or testify, from which one gets "Shahadah"

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:19 | 2131360 AbruptlyKawaii
AbruptlyKawaii's picture

it's farsi you stupid fuck stop spamming your worthless fucking blog persia hasnt existed for 2500 yrs are people born in florence Roman you fucking turd? do they speak latin/roman you fuckwad? are iranians cats or rugs???

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:27 | 2131413 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

Keep your ill-informed ass in your mom's basement, douchebag. Now read something, edify yourself...

Persian (?????, IPA: [f????si?]) is an Iranian language within the Indo-Iranianbranch of the Indo-European languages. It is primarily spoken in Iran,AfghanistanTajikistan and countries which historically came under Persian influence. The Persian language is classified as a continuation of Middle Persian, the official religious and literary language of Sassanid Persia, itself a continuation of Old Persian, the language of the Persian Empire in theAchaemenid era.[3][4][5] Persian is a pluricentric language and its grammar is similar to that of many contemporary European languages.[6]

Persian has ca. 110 million native speakers, holding official status respectively in IranAfghanistan and Tajikistan. For centuries Persian has also been a prestigious cultural language in Central AsiaSouth Asia, and Western Asia.[7]

Persian has had a considerable influence on neighboring languages, particularly the Turkic languages in Central AsiaCaucasus, and Anatolia, neighboring Iranian languages, as well as ArmenianArabic and other languages. It has also exerted a strong influence on South Asian languages, especially Urdu, as well as HindiPunjabiSindhiSaraikiSylhetiBengali,Oriya and Nepali.[3][6][8][9][10][11]

 

ori

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 17:37 | 2131964 Cpl Hicks
Cpl Hicks's picture

Fight Club!

I'll hold your coat, ori.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:01 | 2131505 V in PA
V in PA's picture

I thought it should be called "Operation Trade in Fucking Dollars or Die Bitch". At least the average goober would finally understand what this is all about.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:24 | 2131151 john39
john39's picture

22nd deployment, the master builder... 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:19 | 2131137 Jacks Cold Sweat
Jacks Cold Sweat's picture

Well i poked CVN-65 Enterprise on Facebook. I PRAY IT WONT POKE ME BACK

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:22 | 2131149 kridkrid
kridkrid's picture

not that there's anything wrong with that...

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:19 | 2131138 PapSmear
PapSmear's picture

Sounds bullish

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:20 | 2131139 HD
HD's picture

"Drills To Attack Made Up 'Faux Theocracy"'

It's the Romulans.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:24 | 2131156 john39
john39's picture

too bad its not the ferengi...

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:31 | 2131183 HD
HD's picture

Ferengi are just unscrupulous traders, like bankers...I mean, are you suggesting unscrupulous bankers are some kind of a threat to global safety and peace?

Sounds far-fetched.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:44 | 2131231 The Fonz...befo...
The Fonz...before shark jump's picture

the ferengi are space jews without the superiority complex.....PERIOD

 

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:20 | 2131140 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

US citizen playground...

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:20 | 2131632 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

Tibet-enslaving Chinese citizenism gambling house and opium den...

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 18:08 | 2132079 prole
prole's picture

Actually it's a Taiwan Nuking Low-Level female drug courier executing poor helpless woman drowning next to you indoor pool so you swim right by doing your laps because you don't give a fvck about humanity citizen's playground. (But you were right too!)

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:21 | 2131141 Beard of Zeus
Beard of Zeus's picture

"Farcism"?! LOL

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:25 | 2131157 john39
john39's picture

farce/facism

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:31 | 2131178 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture
The Wages of Obfuscation: Farcism and the AIG Timebomb:

http://www.zerohedge.com/article/wages-obfuscation-farcism-and-aig-timebomb

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:32 | 2131186 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture
The Silver Curtain by Marla Singer: http://www.zerohedge.com/article/silver-curtain
Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:34 | 2131189 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture
On the Pensioning of Roman Veterans; Part II of the Silver Curtain:

http://www.zerohedge.com/article/pensioning-roman-veterans

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:21 | 2131143 TradingJoe
TradingJoe's picture

THERE WILL BE WAR!

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:52 | 2131519 V in PA
V in PA's picture

Will be? War?

 

There are Kinetic Military Actions.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:22 | 2131147 juggalo1
juggalo1's picture

It takes a long time to turn a vessel as large as an aircraft carrier.  Our course is set for "War with Iran".  I still see us picking up steam.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:40 | 2131466 blindfaith
blindfaith's picture

 

 

" I still see us picking up steam."

Funny ( or not) I see us picking up the fucking TAB on this.

Congratulations, we are now entering the great war period between the Christians doing Gods work, the Muslems also doing Gods work, and the Jews who also are doing Gods work, and all the others claiming to be doing Gods work ( less the Russians and Chinese who are helping things along a tiny bit).

To fucking bad none of them are right.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 18:38 | 2132109 Disenchanted
Disenchanted's picture

"between the Christians doing Gods work, the Muslems also doing Gods work, and the Jews who also are doing Gods work"

 

Even funnier is they're all doing the work of the same 'God'...The Abrahamic religions.

 

But honey badger don't give a shit, why should we?

 

Oh that's right, that's our(USA) tax dollars at work...good thing we don't have a huge debt load or anything.

 

...

 

oh btw and sort of off topic...anyone know why Vernon Wayne Howell changed his name to David Koresh and who the Hebrew word Koresh(Arabic "Quryash") refers to? Some say the Hebrew Koresh refers to Cyrus the Great of Persia and the Arabic word Quryash to Mohammed.

 

Anyway getting back to David Koresh:

 

When priests, preachers, and prophets get too independent and their teachings go beyond what the state will tolerate, those leaders become enemies of the state.  It is then in the interests of the state to snuff them out.

 

It is possible that David Koresh may have been such a leader.  What was so controversial about Koresh's teachings?  Among other things, Koresh was teaching that Bible prophecies would be fulfilled in a land other than Israel.  He was teaching that a Savior would come from Iran.  He was teaching doctrines that paralleled the teachings of Mohammed.  In these things, David Koresh's theology must have been dangerous to certain vested interests.

 

Quite an interesting tale, and the rest is here: David Koresh & The Cuckoo's Egg

 

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 23:31 | 2132828 my puppy for prez
my puppy for prez's picture

Why don't they just drop a huge load of toxic assets on Iran instead of DU....that'll show 'em!  lol

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:23 | 2131150 Conrad Murray
Conrad Murray's picture

Best line ever...

An aircraft carrier... the third one in the region...being used to "rescue fisherman captured by pirates"... :0

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 23:28 | 2132825 my puppy for prez
my puppy for prez's picture

Well, you know that rescuing fishermen from pirates can be a VERY sensitive and delicate mission!  First, the fishermen don't want to let go of their nets, then the fishing hooks get caught up in all that kevlar, and the pirates beg to check out those AK's....it really gets quite chaotic, ya know....

And that is why this very intricate rescue mission takes many, many tries.  And that's that....

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:24 | 2131153 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

The idea that an aircraft carrier can make an evasive maneuver is absurd.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:37 | 2131207 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Well, against a row boat or an inner tube.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:51 | 2131752 nonclaim
nonclaim's picture

Not absurd, not in WWII anyway. By the ministry of information but real battle action:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Padz6WVSGBc

~3:00 and ~5:00 (specially) for sharp turns

~4:00 evasion not working well, but only by a few seconds.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 20:57 | 2132501 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

Much of this footage from Battle of Santa Cruz Is. (part of Guadalcanal struggle), 26 Oct. 1942. On the right-hand menu there's Tochibayashi's 28" computer animation of same....quite well-done. A few more years of development, and it'll be like being there.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 20:35 | 2132450 Tuco Benedicto ...
Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez's picture

The ultimate evasive maneuver is to be sunk!

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:32 | 2131162 X. Kurt OSis
X. Kurt OSis's picture

I didn't realize a CVN was part of the Bold Alligator 2012 excercize?  14,000 troops are involved in this thing along with virtually all of the Atlantic amphibious fleet.  That's about 7 full strength marine expeditionary units.... all for a rapid response invasion type excercize.  If you look at the drills, they are preparing an invasion against an enemy with a reasonably capable navy using mines to protect this theoretical "strait.  Now add in at least one carrier group, and we got ourselves one hell of a war with the Irani... err I mean Garnetians.

Google "Bold Alligator."  Plenty of previews for the next CNN action movie coming soon to a theater (of operation) near you!

Here is one: http://militarytimes.com/blogs/battle-rattle/2012/02/05/operation-bold-alligator-2012-underway/

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:55 | 2131271 Idiot Savant
Idiot Savant's picture

I hope the 2012 drill is going better than the 2002 drill.

http://www.rense.com/general64/fore.htm

The Worst US Naval Disaster Since Pearl Harbor

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:52 | 2131520 X. Kurt OSis
X. Kurt OSis's picture

It's all part of the grand strategy.  Just rolling right over a newly acquired client state is: a) no fun, b) not very profitable for the war machine, and c) not very entertaining for the sheeple.  You want to make it look hard (struggle and lose a little early on), so we use lots of really expensive weapons that make really big booms that get nicely captured on grainy green nightvision CNN cameras that are both "shock and awe'ish" and sterile.  Big green flash, big loud boom, no video of flying body parts of women and children.  That's how you fight a fuckin war!

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:15 | 2131610 knukles
knukles's picture

And all along I thought that it was Operatio Funky Chickenshit.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:27 | 2131166 par4
par4's picture

Beam me up Scotty, there is no intelligent life on this planet.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:32 | 2131184 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

Please take me with you.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:34 | 2131191 prains
prains's picture

take multidimensionalgoober with you

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:31 | 2131177 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

perhaps the funding for this exercise is being paid by the filming of the upcoming Ender's Game????

 

Train while producing a movie!

 

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:31 | 2131182 Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

Captain! .. Captain! You forgot your AAA card!

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:40 | 2131220 fuu
fuu's picture

He only has a AA card now.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:35 | 2131194 goatmug
goatmug's picture

Mark my text..... With 3 groups in the Gulf we are sure to see the "Iranians" or CIA or some other group accidently unleash a exocet missle into one of our carriers thus providing the necessary political cover and provocation for attacks on Iranian sites. 

While I love and support Israel, if I played PM for a day, I wouldn't even NOT consider accidently firing one myself and fingering Imadinnerjacket so I could pull the US in a little skirmish or two in Persian territory.  The by-product of course is the ability to drop a few bunker busting bombs into nuclear enrichment sites as a bonus. 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:01 | 2131297 Abitdodgie
Abitdodgie's picture

 "While I love and support Israel "    Well someone has to.      

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:30 | 2131426 Sabibaby
Sabibaby's picture

You must be talking about a false flag occurring in the Gulf of Mexico and the US blaming it on the Garnetians.

Who/What are these "Iranians" you speak of?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:35 | 2131195 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Cue the Star Wars Imperial March.

Or this @ 5:47 in:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EaXrSMXsmwQ

 

[FZ - Eat That Question from Grand Wazoo]

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:39 | 2131204 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

Jew and Muslim epithets galore on this post for sure.

...some black guy needs to throw that in his lyrics. 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:47 | 2131245 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

Yes Bob.  Epithets!  And....more epithets! 

 

To which may I add:

 

Ill-formulated racial diatribes

Nationalistic warlike bellowings

Dire predictions of doom for enemies of some sort

Ignorant pronouncements of realpolitik-y arglebargle

Furious badly spelled personal attacks

Trollish insertions of hot button symbolism

Hitler

Despairing or supercilious imprecations for world peace

Queries about which stock to 'play it' with

and

A partridge in an incincerated pomegranite tree

 

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:06 | 2131305 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

Did I go overboard?

Just a friendly reminder your paragraph structure is poor. 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:08 | 2131322 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

I hope not, the Enterprise has quite a wash to her.

 

(don't worry it's not possible to go overboard with satire or irony these days)

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:25 | 2131341 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

Ok. Good Job. 

All civilizations and races are equal....no differences anywhere. At least we can agree on that.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:30 | 2131425 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

Ah no, sir.

US citizens have clearly the upper end when it comes to push humanity onto the path of infinite growth, unsustainable debt and possibly, destruction of all civilizations.

With such achievements, they can not be equal to any civilization that be.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:55 | 2131503 bob_dabolina
bob_dabolina's picture

No. Everyone is equal period. There is no delineation. 

Men are as tall as women. Men are as short as women. Black is white, white is orange but we all bleed red. That's why we have a black male football team competing against an asian female team. It's because we're all equal. 

We all come from the same cookie cutter

If you don't agree, well, you're a racist pig. 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 17:52 | 2132021 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

It is enough to be a US citizen. Racism is a core element of US citizenism.

Useless to be a pig.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 18:18 | 2132107 prole
prole's picture

Well said by an obsessed retard troll whose entire focus is a seething hatred of Americans.

Go run over some more kids you POS.

/How on Earth did someone as stupid as you even get on the net?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:37 | 2131209 toomanyfakecons...
toomanyfakeconservatives's picture

One Russian-designed, Iranian-made supercavitating torpedo (underwater missile) could really ruin this boat's day.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shkval

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:10 | 2131331 Silver Dreamer
Silver Dreamer's picture

I generally hate using Wiki for a source, but this line near the bottom of the article was worth repeating:

"All current versions are believed to be fitted only with conventional explosive warheads, although the original design used a nuclear warhead."

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 19:41 | 2132328 Phil Free
Phil Free's picture

Mmm, yes.  "...are believed to be fitted only with conventional warheads..."  We -think- that, if you see one, it won't be nuclear.  Think.  Fun to be had by all!!

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:39 | 2131215 fuu
fuu's picture

Is there yellow cake involved? I like a good yellow cake with frosting.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:49 | 2131252 tmosley
tmosley's picture

Pray to God you don't drop that shit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Db3UbxmMRr8

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:18 | 2131366 Jena
Jena's picture

fuu: Perhaps more fitting for ZH than yellow cake:  Gold cake, bitchez, close enough to Mom's recipe: http://bit.ly/y0wsLz   (Not recommended for those watching their cholesterol.  Or anything else, probably.  But once a year...)

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:29 | 2131420 IrritableBowels
IrritableBowels's picture

Aluminum tubes!! AAAAAHHHHH!!!!

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:40 | 2131222 the grateful un...
the grateful unemployed's picture

ah the smell of victory in the morning, and bombing elephants along the Ho Chi Minh Trail

sampans in the So China Sea were called target practise

CG cutter is patrolling the So China Sea, deck watch spots a ship profile he does not recognize

Captain radios a warning, this is the US CG, identify yourself or we will open fire

few second went by, response, this is the USS New Jersey, sir, you may fire when ready...

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:48 | 2131248 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Didn't the Jersey fire projectiles about the size of a CG cutter?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:01 | 2131301 Vince Clortho
Vince Clortho's picture

volkswagons

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:11 | 2131339 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

So we're back to blaming Hilter again...

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 17:57 | 2132041 Cpl Hicks
Cpl Hicks's picture

Careful, Hilter might drop a daisycutter on your briar patch.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 18:33 | 2132150 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Gotta catch me. I'll be out knocking the little jockeys off the rich Beverly Hills lawns.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y72cWf59Alo

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 18:41 | 2132175 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

The crux of the biscuit is the apostrophe.

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:42 | 2131226 Fix It Again Timmy
Fix It Again Timmy's picture

The Seven-Year Itch - it's time to start another one...

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 14:58 | 2131286 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Is the bombing lamp lit?

'Cause ya know, we got'em.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:09 | 2131329 andyupnorth
andyupnorth's picture

Dammit!  The gubberment is making it increasingly harder for us peasants to compete against the millitary in buying fuel and raw materials!

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:16 | 2131355 Silver Dreamer
Silver Dreamer's picture

Defending the petro dollar is expensive, but someone has to do it! har har

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:22 | 2131394 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

Best.

Back like the old days. Save the military men in those times have behaviour codes like honour, contrary to US citizen soldiers.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:30 | 2131659 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

...or nose picking, Tibet-enslaving Chinese citizenism soldiers.

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:14 | 2131350 VelvetHog
VelvetHog's picture

Captain Jerk, and Old Whora should give those bad people the Vulcan death dick and get it over with.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:17 | 2131365 Silver Dreamer
Silver Dreamer's picture

Thanks for the laugh.  I've heard of the Vulcan Death Grip, but not the Vulcan Death Dick.  Is it as quick?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:20 | 2131381 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Vulcan death dick

Puts a new light on Vulcan mind-meld or is it mind-fuck?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:46 | 2131728 Money 4 Nothing
Money 4 Nothing's picture

Ear penetration this time. Can you hear me now?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:31 | 2131433 unrulian
unrulian's picture

too bad you didn't hedge your iq score before that post...oh wait perhaps that's the problem

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:18 | 2131367 rumple23
rumple23's picture

Just a question, which event is  a cover for the other? Iranian War or Greek Default.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:19 | 2131375 Jena
Jena's picture

Yes.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:21 | 2131393 Silver Dreamer
Silver Dreamer's picture

Problem, Reaction, Solution.  The Greek Default is part of the problem.  A war with Iran will be part of the reaction.  We all know what the solution is already?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:54 | 2131530 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

Slavery for all and whoever doesn't lick boots doesn't get peas?

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 19:45 | 2132341 Phil Free
Phil Free's picture

No Peas for Yoo!!

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 19:44 | 2132340 Phil Free
Phil Free's picture

Where's Clint?  Adapt, Improvise, Overcome.  Yeah, C'mon.

 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:20 | 2131379 Bearish News
Bearish News's picture

Niall Ferguson says "it feels like we're on the verge of some creative destruction" in Iran. Ugh.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:27 | 2131410 AnAnonymous
AnAnonymous's picture

War is an evil. But sometimes a preventive war can be a lesser evil than a policy of appeasement.

_________________________________________________
Appeasement?

One wonders what US citizens do when they want to antagonize.

US citizen trash talking.This guy is an intellectual failure whose all mode of thinking depends on actions like that.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 18:23 | 2132119 prole
prole's picture

"One wonders what US citizens do when they want to antagonize?" I can tell you what they do! They invade Tibet and exterminate their culture. They murder millions of their fellow (traveler) citizens and call it a "Cultural Revolution" They threaten to invade and conquer peaceful Taiwan. They ignore drowning swimmers in a pool They shoot helpless women in the head with AKs from about 2 inches away. They do a lot more stuff too but I get tired

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:31 | 2131430 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

Why'd you have to bring that British shitnugget into this? He's like the Hugh Grant of violent garbage war propaganda....

Tue, 02/07/2012 - 03:36 | 2133177 Iwanttoknow
Iwanttoknow's picture

Very well said,GMB.read one of his incredibaly boring and pompous books.POS.

Tue, 02/07/2012 - 08:35 | 2133402 Archduke
Archduke's picture

The Daily Beast will have its Ishmaelia.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:37 | 2131451 Negro Primero
Negro Primero's picture
USS Enterprise (CVN 65) AT3 Justin Kernen from Mukwonago, Wis., joined the Navy four years ago to see the world and better himself. Kernen enjoys snowboarding, golfing and watching the Packers. In the future, he hopes to start a family and finish his degree. — in Mukwonago, WI.
Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:43 | 2131477 lolmao500
lolmao500's picture

And more oil on the fire for the neo-cons.

http://news.yahoo.com/iran-boosts-nuclear-bunker-diplomats-184920735.htm...

Iran boosts nuclear work in bunker: diplomats

Iran is believed to be expanding uranium enrichment activity deep inside a mountain, diplomatic sources said Monday, a move likely to add to tension with Western powers that suspect Tehran is seeking nuclear weapons capability.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:59 | 2131516 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

 

coupla things here

  1. i would like to see a carrier w/ EAT ME on it's deck
  2. i don't we need to evacuate orlando based on this report, but we can not rule it out, i mean:
  3. (paste)  Treasure Coast includes a fake strait about 200 miles east of Orlando that, like the Strait of Hormuz, is about 35 miles wide at its narrowest point does indicate that it is somewhere...
  4. ...near and possible even in the fuking water, i would hope, here, but with
  5. a) land completely outa sight, and
  6. b) (paste):  An aircraft carrier... the third one in the region...being used to "rescue fisherman captured by pirates"...     :0
  7. shewie's a-singin the capeCanaveral/TreasureCOASTlBlues b/c i fear the swabbies may have sat upon one too many joysticks, here, sportsFanz, and boy!  the gerbils are just really going insane in there, now!
  8. ...but, on the third hand, if they do 'find' that wrecked bullion galleon,...
  9. ...nobody would ever figure it could be libya's gold, after all this fuking insanity, ...riiiight? 
  10. L0L!!!
Mon, 02/06/2012 - 17:33 | 2131947 gravedestruction
gravedestruction's picture

in the [n]uking water

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 18:36 | 2132157 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

L0L!!!

if we wanna ass-u-me that "east" has a higher probability of being more accurate than "about 200 miles (miles! omg!)", then we'd "probably" be right, too! 

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 15:56 | 2131536 Thomas Jefferson
Thomas Jefferson's picture

If I worked on the USS Enterprise I would call in sick.  They are going to false flag the sh_t out of that ageing radioactive beast.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:05 | 2131568 Rodolfito
Rodolfito's picture

A rare insight into how they administer mind control in the military.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:11 | 2131594 Ropingdown
Ropingdown's picture

The Enterprise is about to go on its final deployment.  It's scrap soon.  Run aground in the appropriate place on the Iranian coast of the strait it can simply become a military base large enough for ongoing operations.  If the mining and torpedos are a problem, it can provide excellent cover for the ships directly behind it.  This entire concept clarifies why we should be sending battalions of 75-year-olds (how old is Cheney now?) as front line troops in the middle east:  Half the people that age can be grouchy as hell at times thus producing 'fighting spirit', and the other half most likely long for some real excitement.  It doesn't take much fitness to pull a trigger.  It could be billed as an 'adventure cruise' by AARP, so long as AARP gets a 30% commission which includes an obligation to advertise.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 22:05 | 2132633 Milestones
Milestones's picture

HaHa, I'm one of those old fucks and enjoyed the spanking!! Funny.                  Milestones

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 23:09 | 2132785 my puppy for prez
my puppy for prez's picture

As long as they are just ol' GLOBALISTS.

My sweet mom is 80 tomorrow, and my pop is 84 and is never cranky!

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 16:36 | 2131691 Miss Expectations
Miss Expectations's picture

Capt. William Hamilton stands on the footrest of his chair on the bridge, looking through a window and down at the flight deck below. A mechanical pencil, a notebook and an iPod Touch with a stopwatch program are all within arm’s reach.

Capt. Francesco Schettino stands on the footrest of his chair in the forward lounge, looking through a window, scoping out the decked out dancer from Eastern Europe.  A raging hard on, a fruity drink and a  firm touch deep in his front pocket...running the familiar program that's always within arm's reach.  He never felt the ship shutter as it ground along the rocky outcropping...


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