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Van Rompuy And Barroso Announce €440 Billion EFSF Fully Functional; Now, How Do They Expand It To €3 Trillion?

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Following the Slovak approval vote earlier, the EFSF is now fully functional, or so say Europe's two unelected leader Herman Van Rompuy and Jose Barroso (full statement here). Which is great, considering it only took Europe 3 months to ratify something that was supposed to be operational 2 months ago, and take over for the ECB's SMP declining bond purchases sometime in mid-September. And now, as Zero Hedge explained back in July, comes the hart part where the Eurozone realizes that the EFSF, which recently has found it has more uses than a Swiss Army Knife and can be used as a central bank, as a guarantor, as an insurance policy, as a CDO squared, cubed, etc, etc, or at least so the rumors go, has to be expanded from $440 billion to €3.5 billion. Recall: "slowly the sell side is coming to the realization that not only will the EFSF have to be expanded (that much was known), but that Germany, and specifically the outright economy, will be on the hook by an unprecedented amount of money. And expanded it will have to be: not by two, not by three, but by a cool four times, to a unbelievable €3.5 trillion which according to Daiwa's Head of Economic Research, Grant Lewis, is an act which will be necessary to convince financial markets of euro area resolve to save Italy and Spain." That was two months ago. Finally, the governments, which back then religiously denied such reporting as scaremongering, are getting on the bandwagon. It was none other than Le Figaro, mouthpiece of the country that has the most to lose from the inability to ringfence a Greek fallout, that said yesterday: "The euro area reflects one of several options to increase by up to five times, or more than 2500 billion euros, the firepower of its relief fund for countries in financial difficulty (EFSF), said on Wednesday AFP European sources." In other words, the target number is now known, and nobody is ashamed to put it out there: between €2.5 and €3.5 trillion. The only question is what form it will take: yesterday it was a bank, today it is an insurance "fund", tomorrow who knows - gotta keep those rumors a surprise after all: they don't call the EFSF the modern version of the Swiss Army Bailout knife for nothing.

And since the rumor du jour, until it is formally rejected by the market as impractical, is the use of the EFSF as an insurance net, here is Dow Jones with its take:

France said Thursday that allowing the euro-zone rescue fund to provide insurance on bonds issued by countries that cannot tap markets is one of the options being considered to increase the vehicle's firepower, as the bloc seeks to reassure investors that it can deal with the fallout from the deepening sovereign debt crisis.

 

France favors turning the euro zone's bailout fund into a bank that can easily leverage its resources, but recognizes there is strong opposition to
the idea, a senior French official said Thursday. 

 

"The best option is still that the fund becomes a bank...and acquires leveraging capacity," the official said, speaking ahead of the meeting of finance ministers and central bankers from the Group of 20 industrialized and developing countries. "It's an uncertain hypothesis because the ECB has already given a negative opinion." 

 

If the EFSF were to operate as a bank, it could buy sovereign debt and use that as collateral to borrow further funds from the ECB. Germany opposes allowing the bailout fund to tap ECB funding, because it fears it would place too many risky assets on the central bank's balance sheet.

 

Faced with the stiff opposition, other ideas are making progress in euro zone negotiations, including using the EFSF to insure bonds or bringing in the support of other European or international funds, the French official said. The official did not go into details on how other funds could be brought in but said the bond insurer idea is known to be effective. "It's part of the hypothesis that we've been discussing and working on," the official said. "It's a system that works well...which can encourage foreign investors to return to the euro zone and would be a deterrent form of leverage." 

 

A proposal put forward by German insurance giant Allianz SE (ALIZF, ALV.XE) estimates the fund could cover EUR3 trillion of bonds if some 20% of debt issued is insured. It was unclear if the French official was referring to the Allianz plan.

And so on, and so on, all in keeping with whatever is the ridiculous meme du jour.

The only problem, yesterday, today and tomorrow, is the open answer to the question of who will pay for this €2.5-3 trillion rescue net? Because we now know that China, which is busy bailing out its own banking system is out of the picture, while the US has its own major problems - the last thing the Fed needs is for the general populace to realize the Fed is once again directly bailing out failing European banks, like it did with Dexia.

So, once again: who pays for this wacky, wonderful, rumor mill, which is the only thing that drives markets these days?

 

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Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:42 | 1770183 Jonas Parker
Jonas Parker's picture

Amateur Night in Dixie  - Eastern Edition

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:43 | 1770189 jaap
jaap's picture

unelected bitchez.....

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:52 | 1770242 Manthong
Manthong's picture

“The best option is still that the fund becomes a bank...and acquires leveraging capacity”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_5kv8QeBBc

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:06 | 1770325 rajat_bhatia
rajat_bhatia's picture

How they expand it? Well. As the German pope would say : " go forth and multiply!"

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:38 | 1770473 trav7777
trav7777's picture

looks like they are trying to jack their sheet up to where the Fed is going

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 19:48 | 1771775 eureka
eureka's picture

Exactly - but they'll never catch up to US FED.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:42 | 1770489 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

What would Chavez do?

It actually pisses me off beyond belief, even if it's going to make me rich if they keep fucking it up.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:20 | 1770400 TheSheepWolf
TheSheepWolf's picture

Googletranslate this.... Z Á K O N 350/1996 NÁRODNEJ RADY SLOVENSKEJ REPUBLIKY o rokovacom poriadku Národnej rady Slovenskej republiky§ 96(3) Ak národná rada návrh zákona neschválila, nový návrh zákona v tej istej veci možno poda? najskôr návrh zákona v tej istej veci možno poda? najskôr o šes? mesiacov odo d?a neschválenia návrhu.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:45 | 1770190 Pretorian
Pretorian's picture

Now Eu put 440bilion in the banks and banks leveraged  10times 440c10= 4 trillion or wait they can use  Goldman FX-equity platform x400 and make it 40 trillion. And short squeeze all the mtf in the world who  masturbate on a bad news....

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:44 | 1770194 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

van Romper and Barroso will soon meet their fate.

They will end like Fra Dolcino did in the 14th century.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:19 | 1770385 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

"The only question is what form it will take."

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:40 | 1770480 redpill
redpill's picture

that thumping sound is Banzai kicking himself for not thinking of this one first, haha

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:44 | 1770195 Nascent_Variable
Nascent_Variable's picture

I'm afraid Europe will find our Debt Star quite functional when they try to restructure Greek debt.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:56 | 1770256 Mike2756
Mike2756's picture

Witness the power of this fully armed and operational EFSF!

http://youtu.be/r1VKpldKrDU

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:36 | 1770468 Ethics Gradient
Ethics Gradient's picture

Does that mean Trichet will throw Von Rompuy down an elevator shaft whilst an injured Nigel Farage looks on?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:00 | 1770266 augie
augie's picture

EDIT* mike's clip is better.

Rebel alliance for life.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:03 | 1770306 CvlDobd
CvlDobd's picture

+1000 if that is Star Wars

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:52 | 1770196 DormRoom
DormRoom's picture

European leaders are nuts to use leverage.  The correlation risk is unbelievably high.  If the PIIGs bond yield continues higher, and Europe enters a 1-2yr recession, pushing debt:tax revenues higher, and given the correlation risk, Germans can wave goodbye to a secure financial future.

let's not forget the effects of a Chinese hard landing on Europe.

If the EZ implodes, so does the rest of the world, so yeah--thanks Europe, for leading us into the apocalypse, right when I should be graduating.

 

p.s.  Hasn't the mathematical model by the CIBC guy--Lin--used to value CDO risk been disproven? So how is Europe evaluating risk for a monoline EFSF?  I understand the sunk cost in the European project, but sinking more $$ into it is going to overturn the world.

 

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:53 | 1770243 jdelano
jdelano's picture

is graudating like a donkey punch or blumpkin or are you satirizing the state of our education system?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:03 | 1770286 DormRoom
DormRoom's picture

what evs. I have basic hunting/shelter survival skills. I'm ready for the apocalypse.  Unfortunately, I'm a heavy sinner, so I won't be raptured.

 

p.s.  watching Europe build the leverage EFSF, is like seeing the Manhantten Project unfold.  They are building a financial atomic bomb; a weapon of mass destruction.  And if you believe contangion will be contained, then you're foolish--they may prolong the inevitable for a few months, but the fuse is lit.

 

And when that EFSF bomb goes off, we are all f*cked.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:08 | 1770332 jdelano
jdelano's picture

are youse talking to me?  Must not be--I'm with you brother, been riding Paul Revere style for months and praying they aren't actually stupid enough to follow through with this.  Just let damn bondholders take haircuts, we can all make a little money shorting into the crash, then buy stocks cheap (no, like really honestly cheap, not Bloomberg cheap) and eke out a few percent a year for the next decade of Japan style blow growth.  Sure, some pensions will have to fail, but that beats a trade war cum real war cum fiat currency collapse....  

 

(p.s.--manhattan) 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:29 | 1770410 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

And when that EFSF bomb goes off , we are all f*cked. global money managers will have little choice but to buy U.S. Treasuries.  

Darth Geithner FTMFW!!!!

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:41 | 1770482 wang (not verified)
wang's picture

European leaders are nuts to use leverage.

 

doesn't matter the destination is the same

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:58 | 1770542 falak pema
falak pema's picture

their aim is to end the USD reign...the euro is just a stalking horse..for new DM reign.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:06 | 1770319 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

I understand the sunk cost in the European project, but sinking more $$ into it is going to overturn the world.

Here's your problem.  You're assuming that the CB's are not willing to kill themselves in the hope to maintain the current status quo.  There is no logic, no rhyme, no reason.  Just pure madness.

Seems to me that you're studying Fin Eng.  You should have went to med school, I'm wishing I had.

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:45 | 1770200 GeneMarchbanks
GeneMarchbanks's picture

zEURo coming soon!

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:46 | 1770201 kaiten
kaiten's picture

Bank licence, I guess.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:46 | 1770203 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

It's really quite easy actually. First off you start with "the big sweaty wad of dough"...go get your magic pixie dust...sprinkle...and WHAMO!...from sweaty wad to Cool Trillion.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:46 | 1770204 SeverinSlade
SeverinSlade's picture

Krugman says that the Martians are now bailing out their own banks and stock market...Went on to say that Uranus has plenty of money and is ready and willing to bail out planet Earth.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:17 | 1770379 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

he never saw a bail-out he didn't like
i hope he gets his keynesianism so over-stimulated
that he starts twittering his styooopid ideas
w/ tyler

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:25 | 1770409 redpill
redpill's picture

un·sus·tain·a·ble? ?[uhn-suh-stey-nuh-buhl]

adjective: not sustainable; not to be supported, maintained, upheld, or corroborated.

Example: "Johnson stop coming into my office and telling me we're losing money on the bottom line! The only thing that matters is our revenue is up!"

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:48 | 1770216 SemperFord
SemperFord's picture

"So, once again: who pays for this wacky, wonderful, rumor mill, which is the only thing that drives markets these days?"

Martians, DUH!!!

But seriously, that really is the question, just piling debt on top of debt WTF!!! It can't be paid off, must be a worldwide default.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:51 | 1770235 SeverinSlade
SeverinSlade's picture

The Contagion is spreading to Mars...

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:01 | 1770299 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

We must go to mars then! Fire up the rocket Charles!

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:49 | 1770217 PaperBugsBurn
PaperBugsBurn's picture

its so obvious these Tylers are betting on a euro collapse. iow, talking thjeir book.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:54 | 1770250 jdelano
jdelano's picture

you don't "Bet" on an inevitibility.  You capitalize on it.  

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:49 | 1770218 TheSheepWolf
TheSheepWolf's picture

The good thing is that Sulik's chances on blocking ESFS are not bad right now. AFAIK they cannot do 2nd round of voting immediately. Parliament have to wait 6th months before another vote. Constitutional court ftw

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:49 | 1770220 redpill
redpill's picture

This can has been kicked so many times, there must be a lot of bloody toes in Europe.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:50 | 1770222 centerline
centerline's picture

Ahhh... the sound of a can getting kicked and the distinct sound of tin hitting concrete only a few feet further down the road.

Time for the hot potato to be tossed back here to the US where we will once again have a turn to roast on the spit of financial insolvency.

Can't wait to see what tricks are up our master's sleeves this time.  Are we on a slow grind into dismantling Western Civilization?  A strategy of buying time  until China implodes?  Afloat on nothing more than stupidity and multitudes of idiots all tugging the same rope?  Who knows.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:50 | 1770224 Mongo
Mongo's picture

United Nations of Ponzi

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:51 | 1770227 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

They give the money to JPM, who practices fractional reserve lending at 40x.  JPM then returns the EFSF a loan of 3 trillion plus a 17 trillion line of credit to make the interest payments on that loan for a the next 20 years.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:53 | 1770532 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:50 | 1770229 nobusiness
nobusiness's picture

fuckiing bailout world.  Bailout the rich, fuck to common man.  TO THE STREETS!  Oh shit I can't I have a job.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 16:45 | 1771091 saulysw
saulysw's picture

ooops. replied to wrong comment. Carry on!

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:51 | 1770233 AccreditedEYE
AccreditedEYE's picture

HAHA. Who knew you Germans were such a generous lot. Looks like you didn't learn your lesson from this experiment the 1st time around... time for a refresher course. (PS- Good luck enforcing those "tough" austerity measures.)

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:51 | 1770234 Cogence
Cogence's picture

> "$440 billion to €3.5 billion"

Did you mean €3.5 trillion?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 16:45 | 1771100 saulysw
saulysw's picture


I agree. And 4x 440B is 1.76T, unless leverage is used (which increases the risk).

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:52 | 1770239 unionbroker
unionbroker's picture

The Germans are not going to commit economic suicide,i don't know why this THING still has legs

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:54 | 1770251 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Because bullshit walks...on legs like this. 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:57 | 1770262 centerline
centerline's picture

Is perceived as mutually assured financial destruction.  The EU "is" Germany, and Germany "is" the EU at this point.  They can cry all they want, but they are as trapped in this nightmare right along with everyone else.  That is, unless they want to go through the temporary pain to get out.  Either way, it is pain.  Therefore, it seems to me that max pain will come the wrong way before it turns around and goes the right way.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:04 | 1770309 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

it's a centipede.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:05 | 1770314 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

Because they're long and SEXY. And tptb know "all you got is a pocket pussy."

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:30 | 1770447 Dr. Acula
Dr. Acula's picture

>The Germans are not going to commit economic suicide

They did it twice last century. What makes this century any different?

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:47 | 1770505 falak pema
falak pema's picture

American hubris, that is the cause of this melt down that the world has to assume. Or accept doom. Its pax americana that has to die and in its death there will be blood. Financial or otherwise.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 15:09 | 1770547 Dr. Acula
Dr. Acula's picture

Please explain how "American hubris" is responsible for other countries using fiat currencies, fractional reserve banking, inflationary monetary policies, Baron Keynes' bogus pseudoscience, socialistic policies, etc.?

If 1+1=3 isn't working out for you, maybe you should try consulting the metric shit-ton of knowledge available for free on the Internet.

http://mises.org/Books/humanaction.pdf

http://praxeology.net/anarcres.htm#heritage

http://mises.org/literature.aspx

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 15:50 | 1770778 falak pema
falak pema's picture

Do you know how to count and contextualise past facts? The crisis of Euro sovereigns is the same as that of US 2008 FIRE/WS  hyperinflated asset melt down. Same banks running like headless chickens, not wanting to recognise the huge debt accumulation on their books of CDO type US toxic assets, like Dexia and french banks. Sucked into international world wide financial ponzi, they then upped the financial ante further, trying to balance their books by taking on 'supposed easy money earner' the 'sovereign debt'; that ALL bond issue regulators and advisors like S&P, Moodys and the Squid said were riskless, as covered by the ECB and Germany's back stop!

"You can't lose money on euro sovereign debt, as ECB will bail you out and its "risk free" institution, as secondary emitter of alternative reserve currency of the world." Those were their very words of these financial shills!

Based on this impeccable assessment by the 'regulatory capture' of these financial regulators who were not only above reproach, but ALL on the same financial page,  the Euro Banks bought into it massively,to recoup their CDO toxic losses; forgetting that Portugal and Greece were not Germany and France. That is called being sucked into the Madoff ponzi. Capische?

Now this sacred financial bortherhood of banks, with more opaque off-balance sheet, shadow banking investments, that they had accumulated in a mad spiral, than they would never, EVER, have dared to publicly avow to their shareholders, in their wildest dreams, have their collective butts perilously hanging in an abyssal void between two fragile stools. They are in financial purgatory like never before.

Do you get the picture Dr Acula, paragon of virtual free market baloney...? That's where we are, and its not a question of french banking 'garlic' thinking, or Greek 'moussaka' thinking, or Italian 'spaghetti' thinking; its international debt finance that has its nuts on the executioner's anvil...It's gonna hurt... its an international banker's mind set...inspired by Reaganomics mantra...said differently...by AMerican Hubris... That's the basic issue that new financial regulation must reign in, world-wide. Get the picture...Herr Doctorr...? 

Its a chain reaction world wide of cause and effect...It prefigures the end of an age of a certain mind set. The Reaganomics mindset, signature tune of a certain age that lasted thrity years....American financial geopolitical hubris, based on NWO.

Romney wants to go back there...good luck to him!

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 15:51 | 1770838 Spitzer
Spitzer's picture

Soverign debt default in Europe would kill Bretton Woods 2(Fed/dollar ponzi). Obviuosly the American tax payer is paying for this in a round about way and not the German tax payer.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 16:00 | 1770877 falak pema
falak pema's picture

The US has more to lose if its world wide financial architecture fails. I don't dispute that. When you build a financial empire you assume the efficiency and global outcome of your global design, if you pretend to Caesar's role. As you are the main beneficiary when times are good, of USd reserve currency status, of 'exorbitant privilege'. You assume also the down side when you lose your legions, its standards and its surrogate spear carriers. If in the fall out of that failure, those surrogates declare their independence that is normal. Either you come back as lead player, or else you resign!

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:52 | 1770241 Mr Lennon Hendrix
Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

who pays for this wacky, wonderful, rumor mill, which is the only thing that drives markets these days?

Future taxpayers are on the hook for the leveraged system.  Pay later, pay later, pay later, pay later........

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:54 | 1770245 redpill
redpill's picture

When this bitch finally blows it will really be quite spectacular.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:54 | 1770248 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

It's outright theft.  Taxpayers on the meathook to pay off lazy, shiftless bondholders and bankers.

 

Bye-bye 'real economy', hello lost generation.

 

Just like in the USA!  The global leader in Mickey Mouse applications...in all dimensions of life.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:54 | 1770249 broke433
broke433's picture

Wait, why are they talking about this if they already had total agreement on a detailed plan that will be unveiled at the end of the month???

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:55 | 1770254 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

Yippee!  Eu 440 BILLION to buy TOXIC CRAP from DECLINING STATES.  Time to go shopping for SHITTY BONDS!    Boy oh boy, the world is saved!

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:55 | 1770255 M.B. Drapier
M.B. Drapier's picture

the last thing the Fed needs is for the general populace to realize the Fed is once again directly bailing out failing European banks, like it did with Dexia

Surely it's a bit optimistic to assume that the general public would particularly notice the bailout this time either?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:58 | 1770279 Tsar Pointless
Tsar Pointless's picture

Right toe!

Sadly, 99% of us 99%-ers are 100% asleep.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:55 | 1770257 Tsar Pointless
Tsar Pointless's picture

Oh my gosh! Look what I have done! I have lit myself aflame by dousing myself with gasoline and thusly striking a match!

I will attempt to stop the burning of my body by dousing myself with more gasoline.

That is not insanity, is it?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:03 | 1770303 centerline
centerline's picture

Well, if one was to build a debt bomb, they had best use as much debt as possible.  Nothing worse than too small a device and having wounded left over to deal with after it is detonated!  Way too messy.  Just doesn't do a proper job of wiping out those pesky unfunded liabilities.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:57 | 1770268 broke433
broke433's picture

And why don't they do what JP Morgan did and use half of the ESFS funds to bet against PIIGS debt and profit from this so their GDP will skyrocket

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:53 | 1770530 falak pema
falak pema's picture

that's typical WS play : the right hand doesn't know what the left does. It gets you fast into the dustbin...Don't expect the germans to be as dumb as WS.. and US Congress...this is all to end pax americana...So the Euro is just a stalking horse to bring down king Dollar ..then Deutschmark will be uber-alles in the ruins of anglo-saxon financial Armageddon. You can't win em all ya know...

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:58 | 1770271 falak pema
falak pema's picture

its gonna be denominated in Zimbabwe euros... Or libyan euros...once France starts its libyan colony working full throttle. Or Gabonese euros...or Qatari euros...or maybe...Putin Euros.

How about Chinese euros...printed in Oulanbatour. Anything goes, all participants welcome.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:57 | 1770273 IrritableBowels
IrritableBowels's picture

OT, but CNBC is talking about investing in gold by NOT investing in gold. I heard, "invest in RE in mining towns", "invest in XX gold stocks/ETFs", even "don't worry about it, BECAUSE IT'S PROBABLY IN YOUR 401K."   I can('t) fucking believe it on so many levels.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:57 | 1770275 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

Breaking on Bloomberg:

German banks are preparing for losses of as much as 60 percent on their Greek government debt holdings as European officials push for more private-investor involvement in a rescue of the debt-stricken country, said three people with knowledge of the matter.

The country’s banks held a conference call this week and participants discussed the potential for losses on Greek bonds of between 50 percent and 60 percent, though no final figure has been set, according to the people, who declined to be identified because the talks are private.

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2011-10-13/germany-s-banks-said-to-prepare...

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:59 | 1770285 Timmay
Timmay's picture

Europe, if you sprinkle sugar on top of shit, it is still shit.

"What if we sprinkle it with POWDERED sugar?"

"Shit."

"How about if we smother it in 12 inches of sugar?"

"Shit."

"What if we cover it in 12 inches of sugar, open up a line of credit against this sugar to buy even more sugar and then sprinkle that on top?"

"Still Shit."

"Ok, how about if we do all of that but then offer the sugar as collatoral against bond sales at such an incredible multiple there is no way anyone could see our sh.. , sorry assets because by then it will be impossible to decifer between the true value of anything! It will all be sugar!"

"You will have an incredible pile of shit. A shit of epic proportions that will crush you when people simply figure out the sugar you used to sprinkle on the shit is shittier than the shit it covers."

"Ok.... how much will you give me for this shit?"

"Ah, finally a good question. I will give you shit for your shit, since the currency I am paying in is shit, but that just might be more in the marketplace than the next guy who asks me to buy his shit."

"So, it's all shit in the end?"

"Yes."

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:01 | 1770297 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

the market obviously only cares about the sugar high.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:06 | 1770322 broke433
broke433's picture

Actually, if you have infinity sugar the shit will disappear:

Shit/infinity = 0

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 16:48 | 1771113 saulysw
saulysw's picture

Yes, but they are trying to hide the shit with more shit.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:11 | 1770349 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

You have such a limited imagination. You don't sprinkle anything on it! Instead you make it huge and then change it's name to "poo." next thing you "people can't get enough of that shit!"

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:37 | 1770464 Zero Govt
Zero Govt's picture

i think the pension funds and all the other herding international investors have had enough of swallowing shit from Sucks, Citi, Morgue et al 

thankfully their private action (lawsuits) will do what the still worthless corrupt fukard Regulators won't do and take these Big Crooks to the cleaners 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:41 | 1770486 Pancho Villa
Pancho Villa's picture

Actually shit has some value because it can be used as fertilizer. More like toxic waste.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 13:59 | 1770287 alien-IQ
alien-IQ's picture

just add water...it'll expand...really.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:22 | 1770318 Dick Darlington
Dick Darlington's picture

Eurofanatics have totally lost it. Forced actions dictated on member states, total loss of democracy, complete insolvency whether it's the overleveraged and undercapitalised banks or the sovereigns. They have a fever and they think the only cure is more debt. They've tried it with Greece and failed, then they tried it again with more debt with Ireland and Portugal and failed again. Now they will try it again with Italy, Spain and the megabanks, only this time with massive leverage and they will fail. The circular nature of the ridiculous "stability" fund in which Italy is supposed to guarantee 139 billion, Spain 92,5 billion and France 158,5 billion to "ringfence" Spain, Italy, France, french (and other) banks and continue funding Greece, Portugal and Ireland is beyond twilight zone. And all these eurofanatics are concerned is "investor confidence". WTF?! They don't even try to fix anything. They want to keep their political utopia alive and continue the same deadborn policies and debt accumulation by taking on massive amounts of new debt. And that's supposed to restore the fookin CONfidence?! And keep in mind that in case a country steps out, contribution keys would be readjusted among remaining guarantors and the €440 guarantee committee amount would decrease accordingly.

Seriously, u have to be mentally ill to buy this bullshit, not to mention to put your money in it. This, as the whole political utopia called eurozone, is doomed. Only now the repercussions will be 2.5-3.5 trillion bigger.

For the increased guarantee commitments, see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/European_Financial_Stability_Facility

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 18:34 | 1771489 Ghordius
Ghordius's picture

Hmmmm... What if... What if...
It's just "dragging feet"?

Remember, Timmy gave instructions to do something, pressure is high.

Meanwhile your "Eurofanatics" are not that keen on it as you think.

This stupid guarantee-fund-might-become-a-central-bank is, if you think about it, a ready-made-bad-bank. A waste basket.

ECB's tumor, ready to grow already detached from the ECB.

Confidence? In banks & sovereigns? If you don't belong to them just stay away. Too dangerous to short, to hold, to touch...

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:08 | 1770334 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

It's easy to convert €400B to €3.5T.  Just have the guy with the fattest fingers typing on the one comp that controls € printing.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:26 | 1770430 Black Forest
Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:31 | 1770451 Zero Govt
Zero Govt's picture

no just get Goldman Sucks to split €400bn offshore into 1,000 parcels and get JP Morgue to leverage it ...it's worked for decades ...until it doesn't !

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:08 | 1770337 M.B. Drapier
M.B. Drapier's picture

Seems BNP Paribas is feeling the pressure ... and that whingy Germans are starting to dicover the more useful targets for their wrath. They might work their way back to the German banks next...

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:43 | 1770495 Black Forest
Black Forest's picture

Here the initial BNP "interview" published by Handelsblatt:

http://translate.google.com/translate?sl=de&tl=en&js=n&prev=_t&hl=de&ie=...

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:11 | 1770350 TheSheepWolf
TheSheepWolf's picture

The last useful thing we got from US were potatoes. Fuck the printing madness. I am out of this gigantic casino.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:20 | 1770395 kito
kito's picture

MORAL HAZARD! MORAL HAZARD! MORAL HAZARD! MORAL HAZARD!

CONTAGION IS NOTHING MORE THAN A BAD MOVIE!!! THE MORE BANKS THAT FAIL AND GET BACKSTOPPED, THE SAFER THE MARKETS FEEL. SUCH A DELICIOUS IRONY!!!! ALL THE TALK ABOUT DEXIA AND THE FALLOUT IS BULLSHIT!!! MARKETS WANT MORE EVIDENCE THAT THE SOVEREIGNS ARE THERE TO FIX THE BOO BOOS!!!! WAIT TILL GREECE FAILS AND THE MAJOR BANKS GET BACKSTOPPED!!! THE MARKET WILL TAKE OFF LIKE A BAT OUT OF HELL!!!! PWEASE DADDY---MAKE THAT BAD BAD GROWLING BEAR MARKET GO AWAY!!!

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:39 | 1770423 Zero Govt
Zero Govt's picture

So unanimous voting is out the window too... Slovakia said 'No Way' but the EC Communists, sorry Commisionaires, went ahead anyway

like the Laws of the EU Constitution nothing (legit) gets in the way of the suicide socialist juggernaut ...what a bunch of lemmings . . . . Lennons?

Govt is Anarchy run riot in society

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:33 | 1770456 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

How?  Easy, you print money.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:35 | 1770462 bbq on whitehou...
bbq on whitehouse lawn's picture

The EFSF is like a credit card that all the nations pinky swear to make payments on. It can be 440 billion, 3.5 trillion or any other number.

The issue is when the bills come in, who is really going to pay them or will they just kick that bill can down the road too.

Then they will agree to a second credit card to pay the bills racked up by this EFSF one and the can kicking begins  all over again.

Im thinking that as long as the debt stays on the credit books and out of the pocket books all will be can kicked.

Like those instant lotto tickes the markets have become nothing more then tex revenue for the state and its ticket printers.

Unfortunately there will be no real economy as that would take more then moving money and chairs.

Its looking like dacades of slow decline like Japan with a failure at the end as more and more capital goes into hideing.

No great deflation no hyper-inflation just long tragic capital distruction while issues of new credit expand to take on the roll capital once did.

A great credit nothing comes this way.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:47 | 1770504 DosZap
DosZap's picture

Will they NEVER learn, there is NO WAY to correct these fiscal disasters without first becoming FISCALLY responible.

They can throw trillions at this until Ghenna freezes over,ain't gonna happen.

It's like giving kids access to a candy store, and telling them, you can only have ONE piece.(and leaving them alone).

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:47 | 1770507 wang (not verified)
wang's picture

Why is Mr. Market not celebrating this wonderful news?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:51 | 1770521 Commander Cody
Commander Cody's picture

So, are all the EZ participants good to go in ponying up their share of the 440B much less the 3.5T?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 14:58 | 1770539 Dick Darlington
Dick Darlington's picture

Spain who's EFSF guarantee amounts to almost 100 billion (which is supposed to be used to bail out Spain, lol) has VERY big troubles and FINALLY the msm is starting to pick up on it a little bit.

Headline from story in FT:

Spain set to miss deficit reduction target

 

http://www.ft.com/intl/cms/s/0/251ebe4a-f4c3-11e0-a286-00144feab49a.html...

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 15:02 | 1770557 AldoHux_IV
AldoHux_IV's picture

The fed will act as broker and will graciously lend the money we don't have.  End the fed.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 17:17 | 1771254 Ned Zeppelin
Ned Zeppelin's picture

The Fed and its member banks loan money into existence every day. The key here is that there apparently no restraint on that magical power. Unlimited funds created for unlimited purposes.  Geithner is over there with the G-Spot 20 to tell them to get over it and start filling up that ECB balance sheet with tons of shit, and hand out Euronotes in exchange until there is no more bad Eurodebt that is not backstopped. 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 15:03 | 1770560 nyse
nyse's picture

How bad could it go?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 15:09 | 1770563 Bartanist
Bartanist's picture

These red serpent (sun worshippers, luciferians, blah, blah) types really think they are doing what they have been instructed to do to create maximum chaos and provide the "maximum experience" for the souls on earth, when maybe it is their test so that they discover that what the are doing is wrong.

The exit from a pyramid is from the bottom, not the top.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 15:09 | 1770583 Vuvuzela
Vuvuzela's picture

img src = "cancer / santa.jpg" width = "300" height = "225" /

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 15:49 | 1770826 Finance Addict
Finance Addict's picture

Stress tests will be new-and-improved--but based on faulty data? And watch how banks are already trying to wriggle out of taking Greek losses: http://bit.ly/r6VbcB

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 15:50 | 1770832 Market Efficien...
Market Efficiency Romantic's picture

a little off-topic, but the idea has been on my mind for a few days. Don't know if it's stupid, very real or just abstract.

If there is a cultural side to value (and that is the core of the Austrian school), perceived value can be established in society, as has for instance the wealth of the general public due to a continuous increase in real estate valuations. If that perceived value gets destroyed (bursting of the bubble), econimists argue that people now see the real value of their belongings,

Putting it a little different, that is deflation of the perceived value, a social constructivist value, if you like. Would the FED policy of printing but only in certain areas (such as deflated perceived values aka QE1) not serve to heal a defect regarding the assets with perceived cultural value.

I know, this is a very abstract and rather academic exercise, but I think taking an almost theological position such as the absolute truth of supply and demand-driven market pricing from an objective mind demands constructing an antithesis.

This is sure not meant to defend the banking cartel and the bernankster, it is more concerned with the social effects and an analysis and assessment thereof.

I would really appreciate your thoughts, if they are not ideologicaly or politically motivated.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 16:26 | 1771001 Scalaris
Scalaris's picture

3.5 trill should suffice for that forthcoming Anglofrench banking jenga.

All we need now is some multiplicative financial wizardry and we are all set.

 

And you people were worried..

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 17:05 | 1771193 metastar
metastar's picture

Now witness the firepower of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL battle station!

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 17:14 | 1771241 Ned Zeppelin
Ned Zeppelin's picture

Is it me or is this interesting because the Euro-area by reason of its structural "confederacy" must do in broad daylight that which the Fed could do under cover of darkness, i.e., backstop the insolvent banks with trillions of essentially secret loans?  Can the Euro-zone pull this off?

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 17:36 | 1771317 plantigrade
plantigrade's picture

Wondering how violent things will get when this Ponzi madness crashes and Europe wakes up destroyed.

But hey it will be nobody's fault as usual.

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 18:32 | 1771416 Element
Element's picture

Faced with the stiff opposition, other ideas are making progress in euro zone negotiations, including using the EFSF to insure bonds or bringing in the support of other European or international funds, the French official said. The official did not go into details on how other funds could be brought in but said the bond insurer idea is known to be effective. "It's part of the hypothesis that we've been discussing and working on," the official said. "It's a system that works well...which can encourage foreign investors to return to the euro zone and would be a deterrent form of leverage.

What a joke. Contrast this outrageous rubbish with what those same bankster/politico liars 'agreed' to in April and May 2010's, 'Shock and Awe' of 760 billion euros ... PLUS  ... a separate 3-year ~140 billion Euro Greek bailout ... to end all bailoutz ... and it's all turned out to be MUCH LESS in practice, than they unilaterally 'committed' to ... minus democratic inputs ... which were deemed an irrelevant class of considerations ... the people are after all just the scummy taxpayer.

So now we're expected to believe in 3.5 Trillion euros of rescue funds instead?

They could only bluff their way to ASSERTING they could possibly raise HALF of the last nominal Shock-n-Awe figure, that they pulled out of their collective Khyber pASSes ... and it took 17-months to get even to this point! In that case, don't expect this 3.5 Trillion euros to appear for I'd say about ... a decade ... but actually, it won't be there at all, when it's needed ... like soonish.

What a sad and pathetic (dieing) circus. What worthless insane scum the worker-producers of Europe have riding rough-shod over them.

The REAL Shock-n-Awe is still coming ... from the worker-producers of Europe.

--

Europe's $1 Trillion Plan - by Reuters - May 10 2010

http://www.portfolio.com/business-news/2010/05/10/european-union-approve...

European Union members approve a nearly $1 trillion bailout “shock and awe” plan intended to shore up euro zone governments shut out of credit markets.

European Union Economic and Monetary Affairs Commissioner Olli Rehn (L) and Spain's Economy Minister Elena Salgado (R), whose country currently holds the rotating Presidency of EU, address a news conference at the end of a European finance ministers meeting at the EU Council in Brussels, May 10, 2010.

European central banks began buying euro zone government bonds under a $1 trillion global emergency rescue package agreed on Monday, sending the euro and European stocks and bonds surging on relieved markets.

The "shock and awe" plan—the biggest since G20 leaders threw money at the global economy following the collapse of Lehman Brothers in 2008—triggered a global stock market rally after panic selling last week.

But it left longer-term questions about whether Europe's weakest economies can manage their debt and how the European Union can develop more coherent economic and fiscal policies to underpin the single currency.

The European Central Bank immediately began implementing its part of a deal hammered out by EU finance ministers, central bankers and the IMF in marathon weekend negotiations.

The package of standby funds and loan guarantees that could be tapped by euro zone governments shut out of credit markets, plus central bank liquidity measures and bond purchases to steady markets surprised financial analysts by its sheer scale.

"The euro zone is certainly regaining confidence," European Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso told reporters, hours after an 11-hour meeting of EU finance ministers ended in the early hours of Monday as Asian markets opened.

Risk premiums on peripheral euro zone sovereign bonds plummeted, as did the price of insuring them against default on the volatile credit default swap market, while German bund futures tumbled by a two full percentage points as investors sold safe-haven debt.

"The EU has taken a decisive action to stamp out the speculative attack against the euro and this should be sufficient to bring some calm into the market," said Klaus Wiener, head of research at Generali Investments.

German Chancellor Angela Merkel, who for months resisted pressure to aid Greece with a debt crisis that eventually sent market tremors around the world, said the measures were necessary to guarantee the future of the euro.

"This package serves to strengthen and protect our common currency," she told reporters in Berlin. "We are protecting people's money in Germany.

Merkel consented to the massive rescue plan after her center-right coalition lost a regional election on Sunday and U.S. President Barack Obama and French President Nicolas Sarkozy telephoned her to ensure Europe would take the necessary steps to support the euro and keep global liquidity flowing.

A German government spokesman stressed the EU was not turning into a "fiscal transfer union" and it was possible that not all member states would take part in bilateral aid.

Britain, which is not in the euro and has a caretaker government following an indecisive general election last week, said it would not participate in the rescue or loan guarantees.

In concerted action, the U.S. Federal Reserve reopened currency swap lines with several central banks to try to assure markets of dollar liquidity and the European Central Bank said it would buy government debt to steady investor nerves.

That decision, urgently sought by anxious European banks, reversed a long-standing reluctance to use what many economists call the "nuclear option" under market pressure.

Group of Seven and Group of 20 finance ministers offered public backing of the measures.

However skeptics questioned whether the euro zone could hold together over the long term and buttress a fragile currency union with stronger political and fiscal instruments.

"By establishing a 750 billion euro fund to bailout Greece and aid other struggling governments, Germany and other strong European states are chasing a dream—a single European currency and broader European unity—that may have no place in reality," said University of Maryland professor Peter Morici.

Former IMF chief economist Kenneth Rogoff told BBC radio that weak euro zone economies such as Greece and possibly Spain and Portugal would still have to restructure their debts to make them sustainable, despite vehement official denials.

The emergency measures are worth much more than any previous attempt by the 27-nation European Union or the 16-state single-currency group to calm markets.

EU Monetary Affairs Commissioner Olli Rehn told a news conference the package "proves we shall defend the euro whatever it takes."

They agreement was reached after the crisis over debt-laden Greece drove sovereign debt yields and insurance on this debt to record levels, which Sweden's finance minister blamed on the "wolfpack behaviors" of financial markets.

Economists said the move at least bought Europe some time to calm bond markets but High Frequency Economics said in a research note the package was "still too vague to understand."

The $1 trillion package consists of 440 billion euros in guarantees from euro area states, plus 60 billion euros in a European stabilization fund that could be disbursed to help euro zone states if needed on strict austerity conditions.

EU finance ministers said the International Monetary Fund would contribute up to 250 billion euros, taking the total to 750 billion euros, or around $1 trillion.

IMF head Dominique Strauss-Kahn said any action by the global lender would be on a country-by-country basis.

The ECB said its decision to buy bonds was justified by governments' agreement to greater fiscal discipline, abandoning resistance to asset purchases just days after ECB President Jean-Claude Trichet said the idea had not even been discussed.

The scope of the purchases was yet to be determined and they would be offset by liquidity-absorbing operations so that the stance of monetary policy is unaffected, the central bank said.

The ECB last year announced a 60 billion program to buy covered bonds but this would be its first move into buying government debt.

--

Yeah ... rriiiiigght ... totally credible.

 

"I feel a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced." 

Obi-Wan Kenobi - the Destruction of Alderaan - STAR WARS

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 22:20 | 1772083 Quang M
Quang M's picture

Who will fund this 2.5 to 3.5 to 4.5 Triilion Euro?

The Answer is easy. It is G1000. Outter space alien, all europe countries, Asia, North America, Middle East, North pole and South pole too. Plus Santa Clause and Tooth Fairy need to join in too...

lol...

 

Thu, 10/13/2011 - 22:39 | 1772118 dalkrin
dalkrin's picture

Wish me luck all you fellow ZHer's:  I am scheduled to take a vacation to Europe early next year to visit two friends:  one in northern France, one in Italy (or she may be in Berlin). 

Will keep a vigilant eye on the developments up until my departure.  If things look dicey at the last minute, I shall sensibly abort the mission.

To think, I was afraid of traveling within the US back in September!

Still, in this climate of unprecendented governmental and corporate heavy-handed botch-moves to keep the world afloat, I consider my precautions if anything far too glib.

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