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Van Rompuy Slashes The "Future Of The Eurozone" From 10 To 7 Pages

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Now even the beggars (Gollum, Barosso, Juncker, Monti and lately Draghi) appear to have given up hope they can be choosers. While on Monday the press was abuzz with speculation that Van Rompuy was about to unveil yet another epic (and completely impractical) plan of future Eurozone integration, the FT now reports that just 24 hours later, "Herman Van Rompuy, president of the European Council, on Tuesday published a significantly scaled-back version of the highly-anticipated plan for the future of the eurozone to be debated at a summit meeting this week. The seven-page plan, which calls for progress towards commonly issued eurozone bonds and the eventual establishment of central EU treasury, is less ambitious and less detailed than earlier drafts, including a 10-page version circulated as recently as Monday." At this rate, the final draft will consist of three pages... of blank checks. And the glitch in the matrix will be complete if the first entity this plan is presented to will be US congress. Which would be oddly fitting: after all someone has to pay for other people's socialism.

From the FT:

That proposed giving EU institutions the power to rewrite national budgets and urged eurozone leaders to use their €500bn rescue fund to recapitalise European banks.

 

While earlier drafts of the report also contained detailed short-term measures that could be taken to address the current market upheaval, the draft published by Mr Van Rompuy on the website of the European Council contains far fewer details and suggests no timetable for implementation.

 

Still, the proposal – which urges the eurozone to work simultaneously towards a banking union, fiscal union and political union – contains measures that move beyond what some member states have indicated they are willing to accept.

In other words the time to fade this Friday's latest worthless summit, which not even the big banks have any hopes for, is now.

 

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Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:50 | 2561117 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

Hank Paulson 101 playbook.  Soon von Rompuy will be on his knees before Merkel.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:51 | 2561120 Squishi
Squishi's picture

NO! I am the New Greek Finance Minister!

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:55 | 2561129 Colombian Gringo
Colombian Gringo's picture

Rompuy will not be on his knees but in her crotch if he wants a deal.

 

Your only hope Rompuy to change Merkels mind is to go down on her. Eat the 'black forest' and you might have a chance. No one will doubt your convictions or courage.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:58 | 2561144 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

Why argue?  You are correct.  Paulson was an American prude.  Von Rompuy is a real European romancer.  WB should be able to bring a few images our way of how the EU was won, hopefully.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:06 | 2561167 Whoa Dammit
Whoa Dammit's picture

No worries though until Von Rumproast gets his memo down to 3 pages. That's when we will know he's really serious.:-).

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:18 | 2561209 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

it was easy... all they had to do was delete a few "ummmm" & "like"'s from the proposal...

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 10:23 | 2561420 piliage
piliage's picture

When it gets down to one bullet point that says "Germany Pays", wake me up.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 11:41 | 2561766 FEDbuster
FEDbuster's picture

It will be written on the back of a paper napkin and passed around the room.  Three words, "That's All Folks"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_kwXNVCaxY

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:16 | 2561200 Dr. No
Dr. No's picture

"Captain, I don't know how you feel about this shrimp, but if you'll
eat it, you never have to prove your courage in any
other way..."

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:30 | 2561250 old naughty
old naughty's picture

Oh, you mean there's nothing worse forthcoming? What a relief...

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:36 | 2561277 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

The horror...

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:03 | 2561160 dereksatkinson
dereksatkinson's picture

Saving the printer ink!

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:51 | 2561126 WALLST8MY8BALL
WALLST8MY8BALL's picture

 The Lord, the Lord Jehovah has given unto you these fifteen...

SMASH

 Oy! Ten! Ten commandments for all to obey!

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:33 | 2561262 old naughty
old naughty's picture

but he's down to 7...and may choose 3.

wonder which 3 he would pick?

Hummmmmm.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:53 | 2561128 slaughterer
slaughterer's picture

"In other words the time to fade this Friday's latest worthless summit, which not even the big banks have any hopes for, is now."

We are taking opposite side of this fade play.  Too many colleagues will be pumping into EOQ.

The road to Goldman's 1285 is littered with surprises.  ;-)

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:35 | 2561272 trebuchet
trebuchet's picture

EQ still floating on lots of hopium ATM.... All the bad economic news hasnt been priced in as yet:  50% Likelihood of euro collapse plus -1% to + 1% US Growth   (exlcluding any other surprises) places S& P at 1200-1250.....

 

Ctrl + P is not coming coz central bank coordinated message is " let the govts do the lifting this time, enough monetary policy, the marginal benefits exceed the costs" 

Which pushes ALL asset classes down...

 

That's my take at the moment, newsflow on a daily basis seems to strengthen it but any event could flip things either way, so Im out. not wanting to get whipsawed on any asset

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:53 | 2561133 el-kalif
el-kalif's picture

post Rio+20 paper saving

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:54 | 2561135 mrktwtch2
mrktwtch2's picture

they are losing there credibility (not that thet should have any)..pretty soon anything they say will be a sell event..germany once again holds all the cards..

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:56 | 2561136 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

WHY NOT GO JAPANESE?!

DOUBLE THE TAXES OVERNIGHT!!

http://www.chicagotribune.com/business/breaking/chi-japan-doubles-its-sa...

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:19 | 2561213 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

That is one possible response. Of "very few" actually.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:29 | 2561244 Rainman
Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:22 | 2561219 post turtle saver
post turtle saver's picture

Doubling the sales tax seen as positive for markets... W T F.

"The only way to save growth is to kill it."

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:23 | 2561229 Dr. No
Dr. No's picture

You have to spend money to keep from going broke.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:59 | 2561147 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

More financial terrorism.  All paper is dead, get physical, get to know your neighbors, chance favors the prepared mind, always has.  The only way to kill the "state" beast is to starve it.  All eCONomies are local and becoming more local by the second.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 08:59 | 2561148 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

Why not send the Americans the rebuilding costs for the damages done at Normandy in 1944?

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:01 | 2561155 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Why not send it to the Germans?  So Germany is the best house in the Ghetto, now what?

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:13 | 2561188 The Reich
The Reich's picture

bcoz we had built the Atlantic Wall.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:23 | 2561226 Biosci
Biosci's picture

A huge Keynesian stimulus program!

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:16 | 2561197 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

... imagine your on vacation at the beach with a lot of friends...

...and suddenly...

...out of nowhere....

AMERCIAN TOURISTS TRASH THE PLACE AND STEAL YOUR BEACHTOWELS!!!

Would you want to pay for their mess?!

think about it...

 

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:23 | 2561228 disabledvet
disabledvet's picture

I keep the pictures of your topless bathing women as a cherished treasure... :o

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:00 | 2561149 Alejandrito
Alejandrito's picture

And i ask to me:

who do chose to Van Rompuy?

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:20 | 2561212 cahadjis
cahadjis's picture

Quieres decir "quien ha elegido a Van Rompuy"? O otra cosa?

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:00 | 2561152 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

Zorro Van Rompuy!  Give that man a cape and a little black mask!

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:01 | 2561156 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Hey Gollum, I'll send you my plan, it's only one page!

If someone could help me with the 'Copy' button; I can't reach while sitting on the copier.

 

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:03 | 2561158 Rainman
Rainman's picture

"Everybody got a plan until they get hit ! "

Mike Tyson

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:08 | 2561172 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

"Life's what happens when you're making other plans." - J. Lennon

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:26 | 2561239 sdmjake
sdmjake's picture

The prudent see danger and seek refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it. 

Proverbs 27:12

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:59 | 2561338 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Pussies 0:0

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:23 | 2561231 post turtle saver
post turtle saver's picture

"Old too fast, smart too late." - Mike Tyson

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:03 | 2561159 spanish inquisition
spanish inquisition's picture

Does this signify a deflationary event? 10 to 7 pages. I think he is appointed but if this shuts up politicians by 30%, I am all for it!

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:08 | 2561176 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

The 30% was fiscal requirements, so still hyperstagflationary.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:08 | 2561174 Negro Primero
Negro Primero's picture

 

"TOWARDS A GENUINE ECONOMIC AND MONETARY UNION"
Report by President of the European Council
Herman Van Rompuy

http://www.consilium.europa.eu/uedocs/cms_data/docs/pressdata/en/ec/1312...

...if you can't avoid rape, enjoy it!

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:09 | 2561178 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Look at the ceiling and think of the Queen.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:34 | 2561268 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

pump & circumstances

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 10:00 | 2561342 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Blimey!

(slow...over the plate....)

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:10 | 2561182 Joe A
Joe A's picture

Germany's answer is one word on one page: NEIN!

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:20 | 2561215 brooklynlou
brooklynlou's picture

At this point Merkel should just get a t-shirt launcher and start shooting t-shirts at  the various finance ministers. The t-shirts will have "Nein!" in large letters on the front and "4th Reich Victory Tour" on the back with a list of all the capitals who had their economies destroyed and the dates it happened.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:23 | 2561227 Joe A
Joe A's picture

A free T-shirt and a Spiderman towel. Boy, it must be christmas!

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:13 | 2561186 Hermann
Hermann's picture

van Rompoy is desperate to get this agreed before the crash (it must be soon!), after all what his little document proposes for his masters is the purpose of all of this eagerly facilitated debt.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:16 | 2561198 Eddy Vluggen
Eddy Vluggen's picture

Why "must" it be soon? Could take years, if properly managed.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:14 | 2561190 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

What another scaled down plan to further a plan?

Another Summit that accomplishes nothing?

Unpossible.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:22 | 2561221 brooklynlou
brooklynlou's picture

A meeting to discuss an upcoming meeting.

On the plus side, I hear the mini-muffins that they serve at the breakfast buffet are to die for ...

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:34 | 2561269 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Must have been what the 2 day Finance Minister in Greece sampled last Friday.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 10:03 | 2561351 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Garcon, nous voudrons le Beluga, d'ac?

 

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 10:28 | 2561433 piliage
piliage's picture

I'm really really really sure with sugar on top that this 18th summit about the Euro and Greece will REALLY be the one that solves all of their problems. Honest... Really...

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:15 | 2561194 Eddy Vluggen
Eddy Vluggen's picture

Congratulations; you just earned another guest-writer. The idiot comments on socialism need rectification.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:24 | 2561232 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

It seems Mein Herr, that your papers are not in order.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:25 | 2561236 localpacific
localpacific's picture

When you look at the eurozone(and EUR/USD) it is important to remember technicals also Daily Market Review by FXCC 

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:27 | 2561243 post turtle saver
post turtle saver's picture

Barosso... that Maoist scumbag. No surprises here.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:33 | 2561259 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

Paulson got funding for his fiction by pitching just a log line - I guess the market is drying up for sequels for this genre?

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 10:00 | 2561344 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

Direct to (riot) video.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:48 | 2561301 Hayabusa
Hayabusa's picture

If you take the time to read Van Rompuy's revised "plan" you will see it's all about more integration/centralized power.  Is it just me?.... centralized power and mutualisation of debt from the strongest economies to the weaker poorly managed ones are at the core of the problem... so instead of decentralizing debt so that systemic contagion cannot take place (AGAIN and AGAIN)  Rompuy et al are using the crisis to further concentrate power/centralize the Eurozone which will of course result in fewer and fewer people having more power/control over the many.  Even in the U.S., Obama et al challenged and shot down most of Arizona's immigration bill and put the status of illegals at least on par with that of the the rest of us legals... Arizona's schools, hospitals, etc., are being overrun and the resulting tax burden is horrific... yet another case of the federal government trumping the state government and telling them what to do via centralized power - not good.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 10:13 | 2561330 monad
monad's picture

This isn't rocket science. Monopoly always ends this way, end being the operant term. Everyone goes negative to the player who runs all the hotels, who starts making side deals with the bank then buys the bank to forgive the player managing the bank's debt - if he's not also the player running the bank in the first place, making loans to himself. Noone else has any money left and he doesn't want the game to end because he's the king, baby - in his own mind. Everyone starts accusing everyone else of cheating, which by the end noone can remember if they did or not because of all the soft banking they all did in order to stay in the game when they went upside down, everyone looking the other way until it got too unfair. Usually some time is spent arguing over the rules. If the game was fair & balanced it would also be pointless. If they played Monopoly in whatever obviously cruel and ideologically delusional education Von Rumpoy & friends went through, they'd know this.

 

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 09:59 | 2561340 Kina
Kina's picture

Brilliant headline in so many ways. lol

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 10:09 | 2561371 Euro Monster
Euro Monster's picture

Whose puppet is Mr. von rompuy??? :O

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 12:50 | 2562077 post turtle saver
post turtle saver's picture

I'm starting to think Von Rumprider and the rest of his rag tag fugitive fleet of centralized planning hacks are fifth columnists for the Chinese.

Next we're going to start seeing these clowns publish five year plans for Europe. It's become that ridiculous.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 11:02 | 2561576 Nobody For President
Nobody For President's picture

On a long enough time line, every European grand economic plans' survival rate drops to zero.

Time line being < one week in this case.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 13:43 | 2562213 tony wilson
tony wilson's picture

when van rumpleponz is laid to rest.

let us gather around his gold leaf casket chest..

ponder at his life at his hopes and dreams of  youth.

let us dwell on this von rompuy man.

  a bland mediocrity a hatchette man

an unprincipled toady for cabal cartel inc.

gentlemen let us ponder above his grave then together trample the dirt down.

Tue, 06/26/2012 - 23:35 | 2563903 monad
monad's picture

Forget that. Feed him to the sharks. Do it now, he'll be dead soon enough.

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